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How To Motivate Yourself To Move Forward In Life | Jordan Peterson
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Single people making less than $23,000 a year or a married couple who make less than $31,000 a year Even if you don't think you qualify, it pays to find out go to ssa.gov/extrahelp paid for by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services And so as far as I can tell, what you do is you specify your long-term ideal maybe you also specify a place you want to stay the hell away from so that you're terrified to fail as well as excited about succeeding because that's also useful you specify your goal you do that in some sense as a unique individual you want to specify goals that make you say oh, if that could happen as a consequence of my efforts, it would clearly be worthwhile because the question always is, why do something? Because doing nothing is easy, you just sit there and you don't do anything that's real easy the question is, why would you ever do anything? and the answer to that has to be because you've determined by some means that it's worthwhile and then the next question might be, well where should you look for worthwhile things and one would be, well you could consult your own temperament and the other would be well, you kind of look at how, look at what it is that people accrue that's valuable across the lifespan look what, so you do a structural analysis of the sub-components of human existence and already did that you need a family, you need friends like you don't need to have all these things, but you better have most of them family, friends, career, educational goals, plans for, you know, time outside of work attention to your mental and physical health, etc you know, that's what life is about and if you don't have any of those things well, then all you've got left is misery and suffering so that's a bad deal for you so once you set up that goal structure, let's say, and that's really in many ways that's what you should be doing at universities that's exactly what you should be doing is trying to figure out who it is that you're trying to be and you aim at that and then you use everything you learned as a means of building that person that you want to be and I really mean want to be, I don't mean should be, even those things those things are going to overlap and it's important to distinguish between those because that's partly, and this is back down to the micro routine analysis, so as I say, well, you're going to try to make yourself more industrious okay, number one, specify your damn goals because how are you going to hit something if you don't know what it is that isn't going to happen and often people won't specify their goals too because they don't like to specify conditions for failure so if you keep yourself all vague and foggy which is real easy because that's just a matter of not doing as well then you don't know when you fail and people might say, well, I really don't want to know when I fail because that's painful so I'll keep myself blind about when I fail that's fine, except you'll fail all the time then you just won't know it until you've failed so badly that you're done and that can easily happen by the time you're 40 so I would recommend that you don't let that happen so that's willful blindness, right? you could have known but you chose not to okay, so once you get your goal structure set up, you think, okay, if I could have this life it looks like that might be worth living despite the fact that it's going to be, you know, anxiety provoking and threatening and there's going to be some suffering and loss involved in all of that obviously, the goal is to have a vision for your life such that all things considered, that justifies your effort adopt the mode of authentic being and that is something like refusing to participate in the lie, in deception in the lie to orient your speech as much as you can towards the truth and to take responsibility for your own life and perhaps also for the lives of other people and there's something about that that's meaningful and responsible and noble but also serves to mitigate the very suffering that produces, say, the nihilism or the flea or the escape into the arms of totalitarian to begin with you need something to shelter you against your own vulnerability you can think about the world this way, you can think about it as your orderly little plan that's a place and you can think about it as the place that things that disrupt your plan comes from that's another place, this is a bigger place than this because there's an endless number of things that can disrupt your plan and only a tiny number of them that can, you know, that will help you work it out so part of the question then too is like are you the friend of your plan or are you the friend of the thing that disrupts your plan and I would say you should work to become the friend of the thing that disrupts your plan because there's a lot of that and then if you become the friend of the thing that disrupts your plan then you start to develop strength in proportion to the disruptive force and that's really what you want, you want to be able to implement your plan obviously but you want to be able to take on the consequences of error and learn from it and then you win constantly because even if something goes sideways you think there's something to be derived from this that's wisdom fundamentally plan a life you'd like to have and you do that partly by referring to social norms that's more or less rescuing your father from the belly of the whale but the other way you do that is by having a little conversation with yourself about as if you don't really know who you are because you know what you're like, you won't do what you're told you won't do what you tell yourself to do you must have noticed that it's like you're a bad employee and a worse boss and both of those work, you know, for you you don't know what you want to do and then when you tell yourself what to do you don't do it anyways, you should fire yourself and find someone else to be but you know, my point is that you have to understand that you're not your own servant so to speak you're someone that you have to negotiate with and that's and you're someone that you want to present the opportunity of having a good life to and that's hard for people because they don't like themselves very much so you know they're always like cracking the whip and then procrastinating and cracking the whip and then procrastinating and it's like God it's so boring and such a pathetic way of spending your time I started to pay very careful attention to what I was saying I don't know if that happened voluntarily or involuntarily but I could feel a sort of split developing in my psyche and the split and I've actually had students tell me the same thing that has happened to them after they've listened to some of the material that that I've been describing to all of you but I split into two let's say and one part was the let's say the old me that was talking a lot and that like to argue and that liked ideas and there was another part that was watching that part like just with its eyes open and neutrally judging and the part that was neutrally judging was watching the part that was talking and going that isn't your idea you don't really believe that you don't really know what you're talking about that isn't true and I thought hmm that's really interesting so now I've and that was happening to like ninety five percent of what I was saying and so then I didn't really know what to do I thought okay this is strange so maybe I fragmented and that's just not a good thing at all mean it wasn't like I was hearing voices or anything like that I mean it wasn't like that it was it was well people have multiple parts so then I had a this weird conundrum is like well which of those two things are me is it the part that's listening and saying no that's rubbish that's a lie that's you're doing that to impress people you're just trying to win the argument you know was that me or was the part that was going about my normal verbal business me and I didn't know but I decided I would go with the critic and then what I tried to do what I learned to do I think was to stop saying things that made me weak and now that I mean I'm still trying to do that because I'm always feeling when I talk whether or not the words that I'm saying are either making me align or making me come apart and I think the alignment I really do think the alignment is I think alignment is the right way of conceptualizing it because I think if you say things that are as true as you can say them let's say then they come up they come out of the depths inside of you because we don't know where thoughts come from we don't know how far down into your substructure the thoughts emerge we don't know what processes of physiological alignment are necessary for you to speak from the core of your being we don't understand any of that we don't even conceptualize that but I believe that you can feel that and I learned some of that from reading Carl Rogers by the way who's a great clinician because he talked about mental health in part as a coherence between the the spiritual or the or the abstract and the physical that the two things were aligned and there's a lot of idea of alignment in psychoanalytic and clinical thinking but anyways I decided that I would start practicing not saying things that would make me weak and what happened was that I had to stop saying almost everything that I was saying I would say ninety-five percent of it as a hell of a shock to wake up and I mean this was over a few months but it's a hell of a shock to wake up and realize that you're mostly dead wood it's a shock you know and you might think well do you really want all of that to burn off it's like well there's nothing left but a little husk five percent of you it's like well if that five percent is solid then maybe that's exactly what you want to have happened this thing you can do is teach people to write people who've been staggeringly successful and watch them throughout my life I mean those people you don't want to have an argument with them they'll just slash you into pieces and then not in a malevolent way it's like if you're gonna make your point and they're gonna make their point you better have your points organized because otherwise you're gonna look like and be an absolute idiot you are not gonna get anywhere high five casino high five casino is a social casino with real prizes and big biggest hits at high five casino dot com the hottest games right from Vegas and all winnings go straight to your bank account hundreds of exclusive games free daily rewards and come back to get free coins every four hours only at high five casino dot com high 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