Pod Is My Copilot
PiMC: Episode 123 - Get Stuffed, or Rodan Likes Them Like Dudley On Diff'rent Strokes
Taylor has an emergency, Taffy has a glimpse of the future in her past, and Rodan forgets to call his mom...It's our third annual Thanksgiving show, just in time for all your holiday travels. We are thankful for all of you!!!
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[music] Happy Thanksgiving from Potters Mike co-pilot, with Taylor the Latte Boy, Tappy Carlisle, Huffington, and Rodanne. [music] Well I tried to make it Monday, but the hail storm closed, oh hair. So I carjacked me a Hyundai, 19 hours in I'll be there. I've got no more paid vacation, and your family's always rude. But I bust my butt to get there for the food. [music] Well I keep on thinking 'bout your sisters' boys and berry pies, and the sweet potato casserole brings teardrops to my eyes. Though there's loads of cargo hydrates, and the fat gram counts of sea. It's my first excuse to gorge since Halloween. Will you feed me walls and drumsticks? Will you heap beans on my plate? Will you stop me, tell my bomb sticks, out where your chair can't bear my weight? Though my seams are ripping, I don't mind saying I heart Thanksgiving. You've just download episode 123 of Potters Mike co-pilot. Go and touch yourself now, with your host, Tappy Carlisle, Huffington, Rodin. Say hello to the masses, Rodin. I was confused, I didn't know what to do. I'm keeping you on your toes tonight, and of course, the illustrious Taylor the Latte boy. Gobble gobble gobble. Do you need to be stuffed? Actually, it was, ironically no. Have you been stuffed today? I may have been stuffed today. Excellent! Congratulations. Unfortunately, I live with a Jack Hammer, who apparently only has two settings, two and ten. So he doesn't engage in the slow ride, take it easy? Right, no. It was okay, I think it's, whoa, whoa, what are you doing, what are you doing? So Kevin basically made it like 25 seconds in. It's like the quickest part is my co-pilot episode for Kevin B. Oh good. Now it was, it was, it was one of those, today's kind of, you know, gloomy out and there's, we finally, for reasons that I'll get into, finally had where I can relax a little bit and then it just sort of was like, you know what? Let's fuck. Pretty much, that's exactly what I said. Well, you know, relaxing does help, I will say. Well, yeah. Easy. Especially if you're going to go two to ten in one thrust. No shit. Literally. Well, it was, it was a lovely way to spend seven minutes with my partner. It was seven minutes in heaven. Right. No, trust me, it wasn't seven minutes. He, okay, the funny thing is that he's about two or three episodes behind right now. So by the time this gets out to him, it won't matter. Exactly. He said he's going to listen to them on the way down to Miami to see his family for Thanksgiving. So by the time he actually hears this, he'll be far enough away that he won't be able to actually strike. So when there's some, you know, family of four in their motorhome heading down to South Beach, and they see some, you know, hysterical Cuban one. What the fuck? You're right. Silently in a car. Santa Maria. Mother in the house. He brings up everything. Yeah, that'll be. Okay. I do have to tell one more funny story that involves Babaloo and sex and actually involves Tappy and Tank. Oh, God willing. Mm, hot. They came over last night and brought gelato. And this just goes to shows you the mind of what I live with. And I, they, they brought us gelato because we were supposed to meet them for a drink, but we ended up staying home again for reasons I'll probably get into later. And Tappy brought me, what did you bring me? Blackberry. Blackberry sorbet gelato. Oh, blackberry sorbet gelato, which was delicious. However, it had, it was obviously made from fresh blackberries because it had tons and tons of seeds in it. So tanka, Tappy, leave. We're getting ready to go to bed shortly and which I'm like, God, that gelato was so good. But it had so many seeds in it to which I hear coming from the other room, I'll give you my seed. Oh, God, wow, he's a dirty one, isn't he? Yeah, he's a deviant, but he's my deviant and I love him. Dirty. So how are we tonight? It is our third annual Thanksgiving show. Harai. Wow. You sounded like special ed from cranky anchors there. By the way, by the by, speaking of special ed and crank yanking, have you watched the new family guy yet? No, not yet. There's one part of it where I maintain sit and he was like, you know, reading and kind of, you know, pleasing me a little bit just to kind of sit by side me while I'm watching this ridiculous show that you make me watch. And there was one point where we both looked at each other and just shook our heads because of the sheer ridiculous of it, but I, I, I laughed out loud. So I didn't know if you'd seen it. I love that I have you watching family guy now. I know it's ridiculous. It's so you though that the humor there is so you. I will say last week's episode when, oh, I dawned on me who the baby reminds me. Yeah. By the way, what's the baby's name? Stewie. British John. Seriously, the next time we watch the show, we did show art for the week. Now I have to do something completely new. The next time the excuse me, I am in charge of art. Thank you very much. But anyways, okay, excuse me, I delegate you to show art and I decide if I want to use it or not. Thank you very much. Oh, wow. We're having a piss and match, ladies and gentlemen, stand back and watch again. If you would like to pee on me, there'll be an additional charge. We've discussed this. Anyways. That raises $75 an hour to 100. I assure you, it was a lot more than that anyway, totally off track. She has to pay for her children's Christian school somehow. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. No. Yes. He does. Stewie reminds me of British John. And now next time you watch it, picture British John saying those things. The episode of him asking the dog to kind of, you know, take your thumb and your index finger and run it up your tail back and forth, I giggled about that for a week. That was ridiculous and, you know, it's British John. Every time I see it, that's what I think of. And then I think of British John saying those things to someone and then that just tickles me and down there. So, yeah. Oh, and you're no, no place. And my no, no place. No, please. There's nothing. No. About that. Really? No, the last two shows that we've had for Thanksgiving have actually been kind of nice sweet shows for the most part. We've been doing this five minutes. Nothing but filth. I think we're talking about filth for the last minute. And speaking of filth later on in the show, I have a letter. Oh, yay. Yes, I do. So. Is it Thanksgiving themed? It is not Thanksgiving themed. Is it someone that wants to dress up like, you know, a pilgrim and they want you to do something like Pocahontas? I'll poke your honest. So last night, when we were at the, you know, Lotte Boy Babaloo House, I announced them. Taylor, the Lotte Boy, always has Thanksgiving with us. He has for the last several years and at the Whittle Carlisle's House. And apparently she invited her neighbors who are a family from India, except Tank says, so we really are having Thanksgiving dinner with the Indians. Oh. Yeah. I'm like, okay, you're not sitting next to me at the table because when lightning strikes the house. No. Taylor goes, not that kind of India's like, stupid man. No. But you know, your mother has headdresses ready for them if you want to eat with a chef to wear these. No, she's going to say, put an apple in your mouth and lay across the table. Wow. All right. Are you serving monkey brains? Okay. You? Okay. Line. No, I already said Babaloo is going to be in Miami. Exactly. Nice. Nice. This is the part of the, this is the part of the trip where he's actually turning around an alligator alley to drive back to beat the shit out of me. All right. Set up a bitch. So, we have Rodan on tonight and the reason why we have Rodan on was where we were thinking we were going to have him on is because Rodan is still in Louisiana. I am. I am. I know. Yeah. I forgot to tell my mom that I wasn't coming down. Nice. Oh. How did that go? That's good. It was okay. I mean, she called me like midday yesterday. She asked me how the drive is going. I was like, what drive? Oh, no. No, it has been a crazy week and just, I was like, oh my God, I can't believe I forgot to tell her. So you're not coming home at all? No. I mean, to this point, I'd be coming up on Wednesday and driving back on Saturday. I mean, it makes me sad for you to not see your family, but it makes me sad for Taylor and I because we were hoping to shop with you, but I was hoping to shop with you guys too, because I've been checking out all the ads and trying to get an understanding of where and where I'd want to go and what I'd want to buy. Yeah. Okay. Like you'd get to choose where you were going to go shopping, but okay. It's fun that you think. Well, I mean, what I was going to buy when we got there, not so much when we're going. I know you control that. Oh, good. It's good that you realize that. Although, I will say that I believe that we are going to best buy. I do think that Taylor has convinced me that I need to take him to what you know. I thought you had said that you wanted to go to Best Buy and they apparently they open at seven. Oh, wow. Then they usually open at five or six. Oh, maybe. Well, I don't. Well, maybe maybe I am. I stand corrected. At Best Buy, though, get this. There's already a bunch of their stuff that's for Black Friday sales, at least here at this Best Buy, are already on Black Friday prices. Really? I kid you not. I know. I was at Best Buy earlier tonight just scoping it out, because I went to Target too. I went to Target today to kind of scope out prices and stuff. That's funny. You should mention that. Best Buy had a bunch of signs saying Black Friday prices today. Well, that's kind of cool. Stuff that was in the ads, yeah. Well, but I think that some of the stuff they're probably going to, I mean, there are going to be those big ticket items that they're going to wait until Friday morning to. No, these were like some of the big ones. These are like the 32 inch TVs for $2.99. Wow. They had like palettes of them throughout the store and it's like Black Friday pricing today. Oh, see, because we actually, we need, I think, the TV that we have that we bought from the widow Carlisle, I think it's getting ready to go. Oh. Well, even better at Best Buy, did you see that they had those LG washer dryer combos for essentially buy one, get one? I just read about that, but combined washer and dryer, they're 350 piece, they're normally 700 a piece. Yeah. Interesting. I know. Like our listeners really want us to talk about this. And we are providing our listeners with, with relevant, relevant information. That's right. Yeah, but it's not going to be relevant two years from now when somebody's going through and listening all the time. The microcosm of what the prices are in 2009, 40 inch TVs are $1.99 now. Exactly. What the hell is going on here? It's kind of like, you know, two years ago when gas was, you know, $3.85 or something and, you know, we were talking about that. Yeah. It's kind of funny you say that because today planes, trains and automobiles was on like some, you know, random, I don't know, FX or whatever. And it one shot the cars going by and in the background, gas is 87 cents. That's great. Yeah. I don't know, I don't know, six, seven, whatever, but it's 87 cents as it's going by. And I actually paused it to look at it because I thought you've got to be kidding me. So. Yeah. No, I believe it. I believe it. Well, that's like, you know, occasionally when Drummond and I were living together and we would watch cops and in the background, like when they were doing a car chase, you could see the gas was, you know, $1.15 or $1.21 and it was just like, wow. Back of the day. So say we become those old people who, you know, when I was in high school, you know, over Cleveland was president and, you know, our cars ran on banana peels, whatever. Well, we actually, I remember that I got my car and then I got my car for Christmas on my 17th birthday. And like a week later was when we officially went to war in Iraq. So gas prices went from 87 cents to like $1.50. Nice. And you know, I only had $20 a week for lunch and gas and it took me pretty much, I would just, I never ate, which is why I looked emaciated and all my pictures. Happy Thanksgiving, everybody. You're a mess. I've been, I've been thinking of all of the food that I want to eat on Thursday. And honestly, there's only like three things I want to eat and none of them I can have. And it makes me a little sad because it was kind of gross for you to blow tank right there at the table. Yeah, it's never been done before. Happy Thanksgiving. Please. It's not Easter. Exactly. It is the Lord's Day. Not really, actually. Hmm. Sex on Thanksgiving. Yeah, why not? As long as it happens before the turkey feast because last thing you need to be is stuffed before you get stuffed. Well, now that I have the image of Paula Deen's turduckin in my head, I don't think I'll ever want to have sex on Thanksgiving again. So thank you for that, Taylor. That's what went through my head. For those of you who don't know, go to the blog, there's a video of Paula Deen making a turduckin. And when she puts all of the meat on top of one another before she cooks it, it looks like a big hippo's vagina sitting on top of her countertop. How many hippos have you looked at their vaginas? I'm just curious. I know, right? Are you watching the story channel? Enough. You and I went on many vacations with John Bevin. We both know what a hippo's vagina looks like. Wow. Yeah. Well, the truth has never been told. We watched the Barefoot Contessa Thanksgiving thing tonight, and that kind of was the kickoff for me as far as the Thanksgiving is this week. This is I get to have turkey and stuffing and blah, blah, blah, blah, went out and got me all of the ingredients I need to make cheesecake because we're doing a thing at work where all of my children's program, we're having lunch together on Tuesday. We're all responsible for bringing something and I've been told I have to bring my cheesecake and I'm making, what is it, cornmeal, blackberry cupcakes, muffins, cupcakes, something or along those lines? Yeah, making those for Thanksgiving dinner at the widow Carlisle's. Yes. We're having 17 this year, so have a couple. Have a couple extra. The recipe only calls for 16, so I have to double the double the amount. No, I would just just bring whatever it makes. There's going to be plenty of things there. I will share mine. I'll share mine like $14 on blackberries for those things. I'm doubling the goddamn order. The more blackberries the better. So Rodin, what are you, if you're going to be up north, what are you going to do for Thanksgiving? Do you have plans? I do not know. I'll probably do something with Professor Dr. Scott because Wolfie's doing something with his family that day obviously we've only been dating for four weeks. Oh no, I think that's a perfect time to meet the family. Yeah, right? No, no, no. To the family. Oh, no. Like most men in this area, it's more uncommon for someone to be out to the parents than it is for someone to be positive, so. Really? Yeah, I know crazy, huh? That surprises me. That does surprise me. It surprises me, but it doesn't surprise me. It surprises me for younger people. It doesn't surprise me for... No, yeah. There is an age line there. I think under 21, you find a lot more of that. Or as Rodin likes to call them, Friday and Saturday night. So, well, but, you know, now I guess they just become people, you know, gay guys in the 30s and 40s in the South just become distinguished gentlemen. Exactly. You know, or bachelors, you know, lifetime bachelors. Yeah, it's very the 60s around here when it comes to that kind of stuff. It's like 60s sitcoms. So they're all British. You know, if they're kind of flamboyant, they're still just, you know, not really gay, just. So you're surrounded by men who look like Paul Lind and Larry Tate from Bewitched? Right. Oh. Mr. Hurley from, you know, Threes Company. Oh. Who's done? No, Don Nots wasn't supposed to be gay on Threes Company, was he? I don't know. I know that he always thought that Jack Tripper was, didn't he? Yeah. But he didn't necessarily like that's not like he was going after him. I always thought Don Nots was gay on that show. And he just thought that Jack was. Hmm. That changes the whole show for me now. Hmm. Very interesting. You're trying to figure out why Don Nots and Jack Tripper weren't. Well, there goes your doctoral thesis. Exactly. What am I going to do now? Because it's the episode where, you know, something crazy happens and then there's, you know, a mix up and then, you know, it's all resolved with some double entendres thrown in through the, through the door as somebody's eavesdropping through the regal beagle. Yeah. The regal beagle. Lauren Dan, I'm sorry to hear that you won't be with us. I know that Chuck E. Cheese is all over Orlando's or breathing his eye every day. Oh, that's wrong. That is wrong. It's a little true, but it's wrong. I don't go that young yet. Oh, no. So is 19, is 19 too young? I think so. I went on a date or two with the 19 year old and it, it, it, no. I just, speaking of 19 year old men, Taylor, I cannot believe you posted a picture of that douche nozzle on our blog, naked or not. He is a dick. Levi Johnson. Well, I wasn't like, I was like, wow, this guy's hot. I said, wow, this guy's got weird armpit hair. No, that doesn't have weird armpit hair. And is it mirrors? Is he short? I think he's kind of short. Yeah. Okay. That helps explain a little bit of his body to me because I'm just like, he's kind of like a bobblehead doll. Really big head and little body. That can be, you could, you could work with that actually if you really thought about that for a second. If anybody could. Rodan could. Exactly. Rodan likes a challenge. Bobbleheads unite. Rodan doesn't like a challenge. I do like a challenge. I was going to say, Rodan does like a challenge. I mean, I think he likes them simple and easy and stupid too, but I think he also likes a challenge every once in a while to keep him, you know, on his toes. I mean, no disrespect to any of the boys that you've ever dated. Thanks. I appreciate that. Rodan kind of likes them like Dudley on different strokes and he's a Gordon jump character. Have you ever played photographer? Let's get in the shower. You're sick. You're a bad man. Wow. I'm actually playing some of my things in my mind. Yeah. This is the most random Thanksgiving episode I've ever done. I know. I think we should go to the Widow Carliles, all dresses, pilgrims. Just because. I think you should go all goes dressed as Indians and planned for war. With our muskets and our arrows, it would be awesome. Talk about a video podcast. We'd have to blur everybody's pictures out, but that would be awesome. I want you to know Rodan that I tried to get Taylor and Babaloo to do a video podcast with me on Thursday night and they both said no. Our listeners, I was thinking of their right to choose happiness and laughter and mocking and they shut them down. I wanted to take folding chairs and sit in the middle of the local theater to watch all the little weird Twilight people come and stand in line at 11 o'clock for the 12 o'clock movie and you know what it was going to be? You know exactly the clientele that was going to be there at that hour. I really wanted to go and take a video podcast and either of them would do it. Now keep in mind that it took her till after 12 o'clock to gnaw through the ropes from the chair that I tied her to so that she couldn't do it herself. And then also she had to take her computer to the Apple Store after I smashed it so that she couldn't edit the movie. Excuse me, I believe I was doing something else that evening. What were you doing? I was sitting in the emergency room with you. Oh, you... Thank you. Not until after midnight though. I was sitting in the emergency room until almost one o'clock because when I came by Starbucks at the mall, I believe that's where all the adults were hanging out after they dropped off their children. Yeah. I will accept your formal written apology and triplicate, thank you very much. You... Okay, but the point is, you was even said earlier, no don't try and do this, miss me with the whole... You told me that because when I said I'm not staying out until midnight, you even said, we don't have to stay out until midnight. We'll just totally go and watch them because you know they're all going to be lined up at about 10 o'clock. So we'll just take a video of them then. It's true. I didn't call you until midnight saying I need you to come to the emergency room. Yes, however, the podcast is stars Taylor, Taffy and Rodan. And while I have no problem doing a video podcast of my own, it would have been nice if you could have assisted me. I even said if you didn't want to go, the Babaloo could go with me and he said, "No." That's fine. Aww. I know, it made me sad. It brought a tear to my eye. Now, the whole concept, you know what you're talking about, sounds actually kind of funny because people were crazy about this whole new moon thing. Ugh, yeah. I mean, like... No, no. Crazy, crazy. Well, my daughters are included in that. They were not allowed to attend the midnight showing because it was a school night but they went immediately after school Friday night. Apparently, all of the shows were sold out on Friday from people who would go to the show, come back out, buy tickets and go to the next show. That's gross. That when they got there at five o'clock and one of the girls they were meeting was already in line and Lollipop said that they were about 50, 60th back from the line for the movie that started an hour and a half later. And she said there were people literally coming out of the shows, buying their tickets and getting back in line. She said it was... Every single seat was packed in the theater so I was like, "Well, okay, good, good." And she said there was tons of moms. One of my friends from high school was wrote on Facebook that actually she wasn't a friend of my from high school. She and I didn't get along but she and I are friends now because that's what you do on Facebook. You collect people that you went to school with. She said that she went to a show and that she would probably go and see it in an over 21 theater again because it was nothing but screaming girls every time that one of the two guys came on that everybody would just scream. That's exactly, believe it or not, what the little less Huffington said, that they wanted to go see it again and they wanted to go see it when it wasn't going to be opening weekend because she said we missed half the dialogue every time Taylor Lautner came on screen. She said it was like being at a Jonas Brothers concert. She said it was... They would scream for five minutes. She said and you missed tons of dialogue until at one point she said a couple of the girls were just like shut up because you know we actually want to hear the movie and I'm like okay this is my 13 year old telling me this story at least you know I'm glad that I'm sure that there's an element of he's dreamy but... Well she was saying shut up to her sister. Exactly. The 17 year old. Exactly. But I don't know. So why were we at the ER, Taylor? Yeah, I guess it's time to tell that story. We sort of sprinkled that in and then went talking about Taylor Lautner. It was a teaser. Yeah. So in the ER, I'll give the short version because I really don't feel like getting all the way into it. Rocco, my pug, got sick very quickly on Thursday night while we were watching the Project Runway finale. Probably because of who won Project Runway, that's why he got so violently ill. But he started vomiting and wouldn't stop and so we took him to the vet and Taffy met me there. I took him to the emergency vet and it turns out that he had pancreatitis. So, which for those of you who don't know is an inflammation of the pancreas and is often caused by a fatty food. Like they get a hold of something that they're really not supposed to get. And a couple of nights before, we may have had meatloaf and I may have given him just the tiniest little bit of meatloaf. And apparently because I said the doctor, the doctor says the amount doesn't matter. It's just it's something about the fat that gets in their system and it creates problems and it could be fatal. So he ended up staying the night in the ER on an IV and then I had to pick him up the next morning at 7 o'clock in the morning and take him to my vet so that he could go to my vet on an IV and pretty much I have spent the last two days watching his every single move. He is home now. He came home Friday night right before they closed and pretty much any time he moves Bob Blue and I jump to see what's going on with him. He didn't eat for the first 24 hours that he was here in the house. So I said to Bob Blue, after talking to the vet about it, he said, you know, make him a hard boiled egg with a little bit of rice in it. Because that's what you want. Dogs who are normally flatulent eating hard boiled eggs, but whatever. And so he we made him that and he went to town on it. I mean, he went put his head in the bowl and never came up for air. So we so we know that he's doing okay, he's drinking some water, but he's doing something weird now instead of just sitting and eating in the bowl, he's going and grabbing like mouth, mouth full of food and then walking over to the rug and dropping it all on the rug and then slowly eating it that way. That's what Raleigh does too, but he's never done that before. It's the weirdest thing. He is eating now. Yeah, no, he is eating and he is drinking water and that's evident from when he wants to go out to pee. He he's like a race horse. So between the IVs and the amount of water he's drinking, he's he's good to go. But it was very scary. And you know, my my biggest fears about ER, the costs of going to an ER for a vet pretty much came true. It was very expensive. So but he's doing better and that's that's all that matters really. Yeah. That's and that's what I have to be thankful for this year, you know, as if I don't have enough to be thankful for, but that's particularly it was particularly scary considering that, you know, I just lost Otis about two months. It's only been about two months, you know, and you know, she's using words like could be fatal and IV and he has to say the night and all that. And I was well, taffy can attest to the fact that I was a wreck at one point. So and you and as anyone else would have been, I mean, let's get real. That's, you know, yeah, that's it was totally completely warranted. I mean, obviously you have a dog that's very sick and you don't know what's going to happen and you're just coming off of losing Otis. I mean, that was completely, I mean, even if you hadn't just lost Otis, I mean, I would have been, I would have been in the fetal position in a corner. So I, yeah, no, you handled yourself fine. Okay. I didn't, I didn't, I didn't have to pull you off of a nurse that you had, you know, with her feet dangling two inches off of the ground where you're like, where's dog? Give me the motherfucking dog. Yeah. So all in all I would say that was, you know, a superb ER visit, if it doesn't end in bloodshed of a nurse or something where, you know, it's terms of endearment and you're not terms of endearment. Is it terms of endearment? Yeah, terms of endearment. Yes. Is it terms of the drugs? Right. Right. Exactly. Give my dog the drugs. Right. And it's a success. Give my dog the drugs. The titled episode one, two, three. Exactly. So I said what I am thankful for. Taffy, what are you thankful for this year? I'm thankful for the same things I'm thankful for every single year. I am thankful that I am married to the person I married to, that I have the children that I have, that my best friend gets to live within a phone call away, literally, to be at my beck and call. And my best friend is my beck and call girl. And that I have more than I need and I understand that and appreciate it every day. And my puppies. But I would say, I mean, that's, that's true. I can't think of anything else that I am grateful for everything. I mean, literally, I'm grateful for everything. I had a moment today, which I'm not going to go into on the podcast, but I had a moment today in the middle of a grocery store that, yeah, it was not, it was, it was not good for myself personally, but it was, it was a moment. - Not good for yourself because you observe something or not good for the grosser, you know. - No, no, it was, no, no, no. - No, no, no, no. - I got the neck and chest by you with a huge gourd. - No grocers were injured in the course of the story. So now I'm, I'm just, yeah, I, I complain about people who wear you know, ringer tees. I don't complain about any part of my life. So I'm grateful for it all. - I wear a ringer tee to the gym. - Oh, to the gym, exactly. - You're not going, you know, out to church. So there's a difference. (laughing) - So what are you grateful for Rodin? - Um, I was thinking of trying to think about that. I've kind of been a way too busy mood lately or way too busy kind of status. I feel thankful, but I really am thankful for my job. I'm thankful for my friends that I have here who keep me sane when I'm not on doing a show with you guys. So, oh, 'cause the Monroe is a, interesting town. - Monroe, Monroe, a hell of a town. - Yeah, that's it. So, I mean, it's been a hell of a year. So I'm just, I'm very thankful to have gone through it and to have, you know, my job, my career, and, you know, my friends, both you guys and then the friends, local friends that made the round town. - Aw. - That's nice. - And Riley, 'cause without Riley, I'd be nuts. - Okay, then Riley's not doing a very good job. Thank you. - No more nuts, I'd be nutty-er. - Nutty-er. - You'd be our nutty-buddy. If you were a cookie, you'd be our nutty-buddy. - Oh, God, I love nutty-buddies. - I love nutty-buddies, too. I didn't know you like nutty-buddies. - I love them. That's one of my favorite cookies of all time. - Really? - Yep. - Band them from mine. - Okay, we're done talking about you. So tell me more about how you like nutty-buddies. (laughing) - Yes, that's, whenever I go to any place like Coldstone and I have to get a mix in, I always get nutter-butters. I love them, they're perfect in every way. They're perfect in milk, they're perfect in ice cream, they're perfect by themselves, they're perfect. They even at, sometimes the year they sell the dark chocolate dipped ones, yeah, they're perfect. They're the perfect cookie. - They're good to line a lasagna with. (laughing) - Yes, because you know, peas good, jam good. - Beef good. - I will say that I am thankful that Lollipop, it is her senior year that she has been accepted to various colleges, that she has not made me a grandmother and that I still enjoy being around her, so. - It's only November. - Well, that is true, that is true. And you know, the quarterback does come home from his Christmas break, you know, or for his Thanksgiving break this week, so give 'em time. - Bellamy, Bellamy is back in town. - Bellamy. - Tate just gave me the face of why would you go there? Why would you say that, why? - I'm looking forward to seeing Bellamy. - Hi Bellamy, I don't understand anything. - Oh, I guess he looks like a European twink porn star. - Oh, that's right, I remember, but I didn't know his name. Yes, I remember when you saw his graduation picture, you're like, oh my God, that's like a porn star. - Well, because you wouldn't let me call him all day sucker because he was dating Lollipops, so. - And thank you for that. (laughing) And thank you for that, you're a mess. - Oh, I'm thankful for Best Buy. (laughing) I'm thankful for Starbucks. I'm thankful for Starbucks. - Yes. - I don't care how pathetic that sounds, I truly, truly am grateful and thankful to Starbucks. I am. And Disney World, and Disney World. I'm thankful for Disney World. I'm thankful that I live an hour away. - It will be a Disney World on Thanksgiving. So everybody, this will go out before Thanksgiving. Watch the Thanksgiving day parade because you may see Taffy and I in a crowd of four billion people. - Screaming and jumping out and going, "That's my baby!" - Yeah, exactly. (laughing) - I'm thankful for my new Sprint Hero. - I don't know what that means, but that sounds kind of dirty. Is that like a bug? - It means I can download iPhone-type apps to my brand new phone. It's awesome. - Excellent. - God, do you sound like a commercial just then? - I was gonna say, really? So now we're doing commercials. - Well, that's the case. And I'm grateful for my biggest loser workout with Bob Green that I did today. How's that? - I'm thankful for my water bottle. - I'm thankful for my dark night action figure. - Your dark night action. Are you just looking for things on your desk that you're thankful for? - I'm thankful for my dark night action figure. - Do you love the lamp or are you just? - Exactly. I love lamp. - I love lamp. (laughing) - Oh. - So who's ready for porn? - Who's this? - What? - Who was ready for porn? Who's ready for porn? Oh, your letter, okay. - Yes. - I'm sorry. - Oh, go for it, baby. - Okay. - Well, we're nearing the 34-minute mark, so I figured I know you want to keep it under some sort of a something or other. First, let me tell you that this came in an envelope that is typed and inside it is a coupon. Let me read the coupon. It says, "This coupon is good upon redemption "for one treatment of the works." (laughing) And it expired to 26, 1986. Now, before I read this note, I'm going to do a little preemptive strike. A, I'm from Waynesville, Ohio, where, you know, the idea of anything remotely, at least not in my life when I was 15 years old, I didn't know really a lot of songs by, you know, I knew all the main songs by Prince and the main songs by George Michael, but all the B side stuff, I had no idea. So in this particular letter, someone happened to quote a Prince song, trying to pawn it off, I believe, as their own, and I had no idea that that's what it was. So this is how the letter goes. Taffy. Hi there, how have you been? I'm glad that you called the other night. How do you like the typing? Because remember, there was typing. Hopefully I don't make too many mistakes, but who knows? So how was your sex life? Right to the point. Okay, mine finally picked up. A few weekends ago, I went out with this one girl who had some really good experience. She decided that our date would be a one night stand. It was outrageous. Her mom had bought her this book called Sexual Positions. So she and I borrowed it for the night and experimented with different positions. Wow, I was so impressed that I decided to order this book for myself. Hopefully you and I might get to try some of the things that we didn't get to the other night. Oh, hold on. The rest of it goes on crap that has nothing to do with anything. As far as anything that's remotely dirty, except at the end of it, it says, I'm not saying this just to be nice to you, but I sincerely wanna fuck the taste out of your mouth. Do you relate? (laughing) Signed, Tank Huffington. (laughing) Let me also reiterate that in 1985, I was 15 and Tank was 18. Thank you. Oh, wow. He's shaking his head this time. (laughing) Who would've been this girl with, and do you guys sleep? Apparently her name is Mindy. Apparently her name was Mindy. And yes, and-- Your cousin? Not my, you know, that's exactly what he said. He goes, it wasn't your cousin, Mindy. No. (laughing) So, allegedly, that's her real name. Allegedly. Whatever. Mindy Cohen, Natalie, from the Facts of Life. That's who you fuck around. Exactly. So apparently, you're going, you know, you're trying to get a girl to do weird sex stuff with you. So you talk about doing weird sex stuff with somebody else, and then you end the note by saying, I ordered this book for myself, and I'm not saying this just to be nice to you, but I sincerely want to fuck the taste out of your mouth. Do you relate? I like the whole sincerely. Sincerely. I really want to fuck the taste. Very truly yours. Exactly. No, no, no. In fact, the way it is signed, hold on. I will actually get the actual opening back up. Good day. I love you. Tank. Your quivering mass of male sexuality. Oh my God. Thank you. I'm supposed to sit across from a table from this man on Thursday. He's literally looking at me and shaking his head at me and tricking his shoulders like I cannot believe you just read this. You just say, just like you always get on. I want to know, have you shared this letter with your daughters? No. Well, they have to have something to do as they go to Mass on Christmas morning. Jesus. Do you know that I have the very first letter set in 1983. I have all the letters, including all the letters from when he went to Desert Storm all the way up and all the cards and everything that he has sent me. I keep them all. It's ridiculous, I realize. Did he quote Raspberry Beret in any of those? Your mess. OK, so wait, did you answer my question about the book? Do you guys still use it? Or have you memorized it or what? I never saw the book. That's a very good question. Rodin wants to know where the book is. And if I still have it, I don't recall ever seeing this book. Not that he ever needed a book, thank you very much. But anyways, no. Hey, hey, hey. Hi, hi, hi. You know, I don't recall ever seeing that book. I feel gypped. You're going to make it up to be fine. Jesus. I won't be able to walk in Thanksgiving. I hope you're aware of that. I was going to say, he's done his time. Let him go, my god. Oh, you've raised the bar for couples everywhere already. He's done his time. Join us next week when Taffy and Rodin will be hosting our Christmas special. [INAUDIBLE] So you're doing good? I did call him a douche. I did call him a douche. He's got to be using all these stupid words that he uses all the time. And then I come up with him, and I hear his words coming out of my mouth, and it makes me giggle. I've got her saying, banging. Yes. Be real. And not in the, let's get to ramming way. But actually, just, you know, yeah. It's a banging club. No, no. Things like, did you guys bang the other-- Right, yeah. As we're sitting in Starbucks, you know-- Right. Well, the local Christian schools lacrosse team is standing two feet away. Well, we're at, you know, Bible study. Right. Oh, Lord. So I have a question. I have an etiquette question to ask both of you, which that alone should scare the hell out of our listeners. In fact, I'm asking you two etiquette questions. Oh, yeah. Because Taylor and I are known for our etiquette skills. Exactly. Here we go. Normally, a gift I would give people who serve me on a normal basis, don't say anything, would be a Starbucks gift card or something like that. And as Taylor knows, Ted and I have actually become friend, friend, like friends with the people who work at our local Starbucks. What do I give them as a holiday gift? That's my gift. I'm clearly not going to give them a Starbucks gift card. But what is an appropriate-- I mean, I literally see these people every single night of my life, practically. What is an appropriate gift to give them? That says, I appreciate you fixing my law take correctly and spending time to chat with me and share your personal life. But I don't want to take you home and wear your skin as a hat. So where is the level there? What is an appropriate gift? OK, one thing that I think that might be good would be something like Rodin just said at Best Buy gift cards are-- actually, you know what, iTunes gift cards would probably be good. I would say $10 iTunes gift cards. Because some of them gives them for apps. Some of them use them for music. Just about everybody that works there probably has an iPod. That's true. I would think that. And I would almost-- I consider doing like a Panera gift card or something because our Starbucks is close to a Panera. But then I thought that's kind of cheesy and I didn't like that, so I needed help. But I like the iTunes gift card. That's a good idea. But I want to keep something that's around $10, because there's four or five of them I really like. And I want to-- but $10 to Hollister isn't going to get you an earring. So-- Oh, $10 that iTunes gets you at least a couple? Because he can't get you an album anymore, but he could get you at least a couple of songs. An album? Thank you, 1985. He did say that. He did say that. Yes, thank you. But well, they still call them record stores, too. So what are you going to do? Yeah. Yeah, OK, that's a good idea. Well, if Hollister's have any suggestions, please send them our way. And where could they send those? Are you kidding me? They can send them to potasmycopilot@gmail.com. Very good. Woo-hoo! Look at me. Yeah. And where's our blog, Rodan, the one that you go to all the time? potasmycopilot.com. Very good. Or you could be our friend on-- And what is our Facebook group called? Either one. OK, so I love potasmycopilot. There you go. Suck it! [LAUGHTER] That's actually not part of the title, people. No, it should be. That's a totally new part of our title. All right. Well, I think it's time to wrap it up, because I actually have to work on a Monday instead of my usual day off to edit. So I want to try and get to show. Oh, those bastards. I know, right? So and I want to try and keep it so that that way we get it out to all of our listeners, for those of you guys who are traveling for Thanksgiving holiday. If you are traveling, please be safe and enjoy whatever you're doing, whether you're spending time with family or enjoying the holidays by not spending time with family. Everybody have a wonderful and blessed, happy Thanksgiving. Be careful, be safe, and get stuffed. Yeah, there you go. Taffy's motto, get stuffed. Excellent. All right, everybody, happy Thanksgiving. This is Taylor. And Taffy. I'm Andrew Dan. Happy Thanksgiving, everybody. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. [MUSIC PLAYING] Well, I keep on thinking about those pilgrims 16, 20 feet. It's their fault that by blood pressure and cholesterol increased. If you want health-washing dishes, I've devised a brilliant plan. I'll just fall asleep and blame the trip of fan. Will you feed me? Tell there's nothing. Will you feed me broiler loads? Will you stop me for the stuffing until my gastric track explodes? And if I'm still living, I'll keep on saying, I heart Thanksgiving. [MUSIC PLAYING] Hey, go easy on those cranberries, old lady. I haven't had third yet. [BLANK_AUDIO]