Pod Is My Copilot
PiMC: Episode 42 - Grimace Bukkake, or You'll Be Pregnant By Sunrise
So, any show where we can go from talking about group sex to Wolfgang Puck pots and pans on the turn of a dime and it makes sense shows that we are all....off. We get a bit slap happy in this one by the end - lots of laughing. Can you hear them? They Talk About Pod Is My Copilot. (telling lies, well that's a surprise!). blog: http://www.podismycopilot.com/. myspace: www.myspace.com/podismycopilot, e-mail: podismycopilot@gmail.com, facebook group: Ok, so I Love Pod Is My Copilot. You can listen to this or ay archived episode of PiMC at http://www.podismycopilot.libsyn.com/.
Once upon a time, there were three little girls who went to the police academy. They were assigned very hazardous duties, but I took them away from all that and now they work for me, of my name is Charlie. Hot as my co-pilot, starring Taylor the Latte Boy, Taffy Carlisle Huffington, and Rodan as Bosley. You're listening to episode 42 of Pod Is My Co-Pilot. We are joined with Taylor Crazy Bear, the Latte Boy. Really? You're starting to be right away? Ms. Taffy Carlisle. I need palliative care. Ms. Taffy Carlisle Huffington, and myself Rodan. I've missed my boys this week, and my boys, I mean you two. I don't feel like I've talked to either one of you very much this week. I know. You posted on the blog, we were all supposed to know you were sick, I'm like, how did I don't remember you saying you were sick? I've been sick for like ever. A week and a half, too. We talked about me being sick on the last episode. Fucker. I thought it was just that you were getting sick, now that you were sick. We didn't realize that herpes actually meant sick, but okay. Well, if anybody can fight it, you can. That is true. Has anyone ever told you you're my hero? I'm the wind beneath you. And that wind would be a queef, but anyway. Suddenly, I'm feeling better. I am here for your pleasure. Wow. Okay. Wow. So how are we all doing? We're lovely. How are you? I'm inside your illness. I'm actually feeling much better. I just have this nasal thing going on. I just sort of want to shoot my nasal load all over the place. It looks about the same, I'm sure, but yeah, and I was just before we started recording. I said to Mr. Rodan, I have to go run in the bathroom and do a little bump in the bathroom. A.K.A. nasal spray. Wait, so if his spooge and his scottop stuff looks the same, so his spooge is green? No. No. Ew. That is kind of gross. Ew, that's so not right. Why am I suddenly thinking of John Goodman? I told you how to get rid of that far. And it's never going to happen. Explain to the listeners what you told me I should do on Friday. Oh, I didn't see you on Friday. And you saw me on Tuesday, but that's fine. I see. How quickly they forget. No, but I mean, it feels like it's been forever since I've seen you. I know. I agree. I agree a hundred percent. All right. So tell everybody about this weird, crazy, not the thing you're trying to do to me. It's not crazy. Anyone who has allergies knows they have heard of a nasal bidet. A nasal bidet looks like a gravy boat on steroids. Oh, like a neti pot. A neti pot. That's exactly what it is. Thank you. Taylor thinks I'm crazy. I said no. I call them nasal bidets, but neti pots are their actual name. You can buy them at any medical supply store and it looks like a gravy boat with a little tiny spigot. You put the spigot in one side of your nose, you tilt your head over a sink and it goes up through your nasal cavity, cleans out all the dust and bacteria that's in your nose and it runs out the other side. Now, obviously you want to do this with a little warmer water and you want to add a little salt into it and dissolve it. My youngest daughter has allergies and especially, unfortunately, to Spanish moss, which covers the trees around our house. Oh, God. I was going to say, that's your tree and your front yard is totally covered in it. About three times a year, she gets to wear her eyes and everything about her gets all stuffy and red and pitiful. The neti pot is the only thing that makes her life livable and I explain to him if you're super congested, make the water just a touch warmer and I'm telling you, it'll get the shit out of there and he's like, that is never going to happen. Oh my God, I came and believed you'd suggest that. And I said, I'm telling you, it's amazing, you do it two, three times and you're going to tell a difference and he refuses to do it because he's a big giant girl. Well, but I did get the baby syringe or the ball syringe thing. Yeah, she did get the ball syringe, which is- Yeah, she did get the ball syringe, which is- Which is- And it didn't work because I was touching my brain. I am convinced that- I told you- I had to cut the end off. Okay, why would I cut the end off? That's- Because you're not a baby? No, just to make it wider. Why would I make it wider than it wouldn't be able to get up my nose? Well, it's a sign of the babies. Yeah, that's for babies, like itty bitty infants. Yeah, you need to have it wider, so you need to cut the end off of it and then- But it was all the way up in your nose. Shut up in your nose. That's because it wasn't getting anything, it needs to be- the hole needs to be bigger. Don't worry, I can help you with this. Well, if anybody knows about getting their hole bigger, it would be you, so- You have to trust me. You said that with that thing on my leg and you were taking extreme pleasure in like digging gunk out of my shin before. And you know what? It was a good thing that I did. So shut up. That's not the point. All right then. I think you're leading to let Miss Taffy mother you a little bit and just get over it. She just wants to show up at my house saying, "I've heard that you were feeling ill." That's right. Had a heavier and a chill. I'm here to help restore your pluck. Because I'm the nurse who likes to, and then I slam the door on her face. That was the very first one message I ever left on his phone. That I think was the moment that we became friends. Yes. Now that you say that, I honestly think that because you and I hadn't really hung out too much, but I was homesick from work and she called and that was the first thing she said to me and I roared and made me feel better. That maybe our defining moment for our friendship. Aw. Aw. I never thought of that before. That and the best story ever that came out of Orlando, but that's for the 100th podcast I know. Wow. I know. And we were friends much longer before that. For a long time before that. That was the one and only night that you and I were truly drunk together. Um, yeah. I was actually thinking about that story. There is a good chance that we may be telling that story soon. Well now we can't tell a story without at least drum, drum and lola preferably, but we have to have at least drum. Well, but we, okay, we'll talk about that a little bit later on, but we may be telling that story sooner than I think you were thinking, like you, I know you want to save it for like the 100th podcast, well, because we're going to be meeting a couple of people next weekend. Oh God. So this way they're going to love that. This way we would have an active audience to respond to the story. That's true. We could do a video podcast of their reactions since they love to especially Michael and FYI, I know this is a side note, but if you all haven't been to Q cast, check out the new video. Oh my God. I love him. I love him. Anyways, we should totally do a video podcast of their reaction to the story because we should probably explain what we're talking about. We're going to be meeting Kevin and Michael for dinner and they're coming down to Saint Pete to have dinner with us next week. And so oh, by the way, Michael, this is the first you're hearing about this. Tappy said it was okay. If you came down Michael has a free standing reservation at our table and by table she means her face. And by face I'm in between tank and I in the nest of love. Oh God. Yeah. In other words, there's a Q cast room in the Huffington estate again on my face. And Mr. B in a Cupid outfit hanging by wires over the door. Mr. B in a Cupid outfit. That's the title for episode 42. You have to tell the British John story. I have got to tell you, I have secretly giggled like it stoplights and by myself and just here and there, just the mental picture of what he did at Disney World has tickled me in places down deep that only a selected few have been to. I got to tell you that is going to be one of the I have so much respect for him after hearing that story. I want to hang out to him and I love him just from that story alone. British wrote in British John mentioned on Q cast Connecticut that when the day that we saw them at Disney World, it was very, very crowded and it was very busy and he was a little bored. So he purposely took some ice cream and smeared it around his mouth and pretended to be retarded for a few minutes. Really? Yeah. Can you just, my brain goes to the absolute integrate and all I can picture is him standing dried ice cream like holding the zipper on his pants, jumping up and down in front of one of the companion bathrooms, acting like he's retarded until Michael or Kevin grab him and jerk him into the companion bathroom so he can go to the bathroom. And I got to tell you, it has actually stunted me for doing things. I cannot get past that image, it just, I, oh man, yeah, I, I just can't, I love him. The bottom line, that is the greatest thing I've ever heard in my life. They're wonderful. They're all wonderful. Yes, but the Tracy, the Tracy Almond video is, I can't talk about it. And the funny thing, the funny thing is right before I download that podcast, yesterday was my day where I can get the 30 new songs on E music for the monthly subscription. And I downloaded the best of Tracy Almond. Really? Just download that, had just got done listening to that song and then was like, oh, I have a new cue cast, you know, video. And it was that song and it was the weirdest thing. I called Michael about 30 seconds after I watched it and he just started laughing. He goes, I knew you were going to call me when you saw it. I was like, that's fabulous. It is. That's fantastic. Aww. Aww. So how was your way, Kritan? It was good, even though I worked and it didn't work. I was like, that was the conviction, by the way. Honestly, thy name is Rodan. It was good. It was, it was good because all I did at work all week was pretty much sit looking and hitting the refresh button on Engadget and CNET as they were releasing stuff from CES. That's what I did. I explained to Taffy with CES as she has no idea. Oh, the Consumer Electronics Show in Vegas. Vegas where they released the 119 inch flat screen? Yes. What? Yeah. 119 inch, 98,000 available in what, May? Yeah. It replaced the 100 and 300, which was the biggest one they made. Is it Panasonic? I think so. And there's also like, that's not the life screen, which is like 15 feet, like 10 feet. Yeah, but that's like a what, a quarter of a million dollars or something. This one is supposed to be the, it's under 100,000. It's like, I mean, not really 'cause with tax will be over, but it's like 98 plus, but it's, it's Panasonic. If you're paying 98, what's another 7? What's another 12, exactly. I don't know. Yeah, right. Yeah. Wow. Because the bracket to mount the thing I think they said was like $5,600 or something and it has to, you have to sign all these waivers once you have a professionally installed. It's sad that I know this much about it actually. Have you ever, have you ever been out there and went to the Consumer Show? Oh my. I would love to. I went in 1996 and I have to tell you, wow, you will leave there and went to. And there is no frickin' way Taylor could go because he can't walk through Best Buy. He can't walk through Best Buy without finding out things he wants to buy. You go in there and you go home and you go, I hate everything in my whole house. Everything has to go. Stupid brand new iPod. Shh. Shh. Shadows do a million pieces. No, no. No, no, no. Not even iPods. Stupid toaster. I mean, everything that's electronic you hate. Yeah. Oh. Yeah. Well, that, that screen that's like, you know, wall size, that's like billboard size for your house. The only thing I can think of is why, because it's like I call the live screen or whatever. The only thing I can think of is how do you watch porn on that because things are going to be so big and so crazy. It's like giant vagina. It's coming to eat me. Oh my God. It's the movie. What's the movie called? Teeth or something. Why are you watching porno with vagina in it? Thank you. Well, not me, but I'm just like, I, I, I, I would be traumatized the rest of my life watching a big wall screen. I don't watch porno on television anymore. He watches porno on his computer. Did I say that out loud? I believe he did. We all know that's the way it is. Don't. I do occasionally. Actually, that's not true. I have one DVD. I do have one porn DVD. You and your sticky keyboard. Oh God. That's only least talking to Luke. That's not true. Right. Yes it is. It's saran wrap over the keyboard. It's fine. It's hermetically sealed saran wrap on the keyboard. That's why you went to Sam's about that big roll of glad press and seal. That's such a great idea. No, I do that. All right. That's disgusting. I do have, I do own one DVD and it's kind of weird to watch it on TV versus like I remember when I was a kid having VHS tapes that I had like, you know, stuck under the mattress, so to speak, and all that sort of thing. So, I mean. Why don't you get porn as a child? It was passed down from like, you know, seniors in high school to sophomores in high school and all that sort of stuff and so. God. Have the little us having to do. I have a porn ring and have it. But when you watch, you know, when you watch a VHS tape, it's very, there's the greenie aspect to it versus DVDs are very clear. So the first time I actually sat and watched the DVD. I was very like, this is actually bothering me because it felt like it was somebody's home movie versus something that was on like, you know, so it, I only watched it for about three minutes, which honestly was all I needed. But that was still, it was just very disconcerting and actually the worst part is at the very end, there's a fisting scene, which I didn't know and I was like, Oh, oh, all of a sudden the guy taffy. Next time you come over, I'll show it to you. It is the freakin'. Oh my God. Oh my God. And this is a real conversation that took place on Friday in the middle of the scrapbooking aisle of the local Target. So my favorite part of the porn is when like, you know, the really big football guy is like getting on with the coach who's like this little twink and then all of a sudden the football guy goes down on a force and the twink gives it to him hard. Oh my God, that's so awesome. I'm looking at him going, I am looking at scrapbook things that are in the shape of a megaphone. It got us out of the scrapbooking aisle, didn't it? That's true. Touché. Oh, nice. How did we even get talking about that? How do we get talking about all the things that we talk about? Thank you. I don't know. Hey, by any chance I'm going to change the sector. I sent you a series of pictures and your response to was, okay, why, which I didn't understand your response. Of course, I'm sure you didn't understand the pictures either. Exactly. That's why I said, okay, why. Explain to the listeners the pictures. Okay. So the little less Huffington, we are going to London and Paris in about four weeks. And one of the restaurants we are eating at is called Beach Blanket Babylon. And if you should go to their website, it's incredible. I'll put it in the show notes. If you send me the link, I'll put it in the show notes. It's very couture, high fashion, gothic, ethereal. It's just this amazing restaurant that I've wanted to eat at for quite a while. And the little Stuffington is very much into design and all things, hot couture and odd and anyways. So she had this idea that she wanted to, on Saturdays, we usually have Saturdays where we take pictures where, you know, it's like, let's do each other's makeup and take pictures just because it's something fun to do. And she watches America's Next Top Model. So I decided that I was going to take her picture jumping on the trampoline. And I said, okay, go get dressed. I want to take pictures of you jumping on the trampoline to which she comes outside in her sister's ball gown. So what ended up, where I looked at her and went, really, and then Lollipop did her makeup and it was all very kind of sort of drag queeny and bizarre and I don't know. And the dress is really in some areas too big for her and some areas too small for her. It's just bizarre and it's hot pink. And the sun was setting just the right angle that it caught her hair and I took some of the truly weirdest pictures of her jumping on the trampoline in this pink dress. And honestly, some of them look like they could go on this on this website because they're very grainy and I was playing with all the editing on, I was using one of the new cameras a girl's got for Christmas. So I was playing with, you know, let's take it on landscape. Let's take it with sepia tones and all this other stuff. Some of them are really, really cool. Some of them are completely frickin bizarre. So I sent them to you. She was like, send them to Taylor, send them to Taylor. He'll love them. And then your response back was, okay, why? And she's like, he didn't get it. I'm like, I'm sure he did. He's just being a jerk. Well, thank you for that. No, she wanted, she wanted your critique of how fabulous she was and instead you went okay. Well, I enjoyed the picture of her where she's doing the split and she's got her hands and she's sort of facing forward. Yeah. That's, that's a cool one. But it's just it was a very, like, you know, I should really know better that when there really isn't any sort of thing in the title of what I see the little paperclip, that there's going to be some weird fucking picture of some member of your family. Exactly. I just sent you an email to have your fucking picture of a member of my family with nothing in the subject line. Go to your email. I'll just do it in a little while. Yes. But no, you know what? In fact, I will find a pick one of the pictures on here that doesn't necessarily show her face and I'll let you post it if you want to because some of them are quite cool and some of them are completely bizarre, but all right, that's okay. So can I tell you all about what happened to me last night? Does it involve a fist? No, it does not involve a. No, I did not watch my DVD. Um, okay, well, I have to back up in that I had decided that it was supposed to be a little bit cooler over the next couple of days and by cooler here means like, you know, 63, 70. Yeah. Yeah. By cooler here, it means 96 and I decided I was going to make chicken bog, which I think I've talked about on the show before. It's pretty much it's a polity and recipe, which is chicken and rice and you take smoke sausage and all sorts of spices and bay leaves and yummy and it costs about $4 and you can eat off of it for about three months. So I thought I would make this. So yesterday I go with my friend Bridget, who is a coworker of mine and also a listener of the podcast. So say hi to Bridget. Hi Bridget. Well, so we walk around the Saturday morning market, which is this thing that they do downtown during like the cooler months of the year where they have, you know, the Artisans gallery and they have all of the, you know, the, like the farmer's market and all that sort of stuff and they've got all this really great produce and different, you know, stands where you can get, you know, fried cheesecake and all these. It's like a little fair that they do every morning and it's totally expanded and there's all sorts of great things. When we decided that we were going to go someplace where we were going to sit down for lunch and in the process of trying to find a place, we walked into this little store called Sherry's, which is sort of a little, it kind of is like Nicholson house back in Hyde Park where it's got all these little artsy things and little quirky books and, you know, like the Mick Wright greeting cards that have all the old pictures from the 70s and the funny things on the inside of them, all that kind of stuff. Right. One of the decorations are that they have old time glass soda bottles up on the top shelf of their book area and they had an old bottle of Welch's grape soda. Oh my God. So and I, and Bridget and I both saw at the same time went, "Oh my God, grape soda. I haven't had grape soda in forever. That's so awesome. Grape soda, grape soda, grape soda." She, so we go have lunch. She drops me back off at my house. I have to go to Publix to get the stuff that I need. So I get, I pick up the chicken. I pick up the sausage. I pick up the rice. And I had needed bagels for breakfast in the morning and they just had the bagels in the same aisle that they have all the soda. So I say to myself, "You know what? I have grape soda about once a year. I think I'm going to have grape soda with my chicken bog tonight." So I walk my little ass down to the soda, I grab chicken bog, I grab grape soda and I put it in my cart. It's Fanta grape soda. So which the whole time I'm picturing Beth from the Mad TV, the Wanna Fanta, don't you wanna Wanna Fanta? So I get home and I, you know, am very much wanting to not go crazy with making a mess with the chicken bog because I have to like quarter the chicken and then you have to take all the meat off the chicken and there's bones everywhere. Okay, we'll discuss how to do that easier later. Okay, well that's focus. So I may, you know, take all the bones out and everything and I put all the chicken back in and everything and it's cooking. And then I'm like, "You know what? I've got a good 20 minutes, so I'm going to wash all of the dishes while I'm waiting for the chicken bog to finish. The only thing I have to worry about is my bowl and my pot and that's all I have to worry about washing afterwards. So I wash all the dishes, everything sitting in the dish rack, which Taffy got me, or actually Taffy got drum a couple years ago, but drum left it here. I apparently got the dish rack in the divorce, but that's be the only one there. But he's not better. No, I love the dish rack, I'm glad I got the dish rack. Exactly. So now I decide I'm going to have my grape soda. So I pick it up off the one counter and I move to go to where the cup is on the other counter and I start to turn the knob. And the next thing I remember is a sound and just seeing purple. Oh no. So I'm having the whole, I love Lucy where I'm making the, where I'm moving my mouth and I'm like trying it because, you know, it tastes really good. On the other hand, I'm realizing there's purple everywhere. I kept the, get the thing on, it had been sitting there for an hour. I don't know why it sprayed all over the place. It looks, I looked like Barney and Grimace had Bukaki all over. Oh my God. I was covered ahead of the time. Did you just say Grimace Bukaki? Yes he did, I think that should be the name of the show. There it is. That is not right. Grimace Bukaki. Now I have a primarily, I have red walls, but I have all white cabinets. Purple splattered all over the cabinets, all over the refrigerator, all over the floor, all over everything and all of the dishes that I watched are now got purple sticky specs all over them and the ice cube trays now have like purpleish, you know, she's colored water. A two liter. It was a two liter. I was standing in the middle of, it was like everything got hit. Now I'm standing, now I'm in my underwear with Clorox wipes and paper towels, wiping everything up, trying to get everything, you know, cleaned before. Meanwhile then also the dogs are getting a sugar high licking the floor and licking all the grapes owed off the floor. So did you have all of it, did you have any left to enjoy? No, I used up probably about a quarter of the bottle, but then the whole time I'm drinking and I'm just like stupid grapes owed every time I'm taking a sip of it. You know, that's. Did you hear that? Yes, I did. That was the alert that says I now have mail, but sorry, you can edit that out. That's from, you know, Napoleon Dynamite. I know. I'm sorry. But shut up. So that was my, that was the big thing that happened to me this week, isn't that sad? That was the most exciting thing that happened to me. That and I told you. No, you're a porn fan. It's really sad. The most. And by total we need to act it out. Wait, you have a porn fan about fisting? Put me in coach. That's how we got talking about it because it says, one of the stickers had put me in coach. And that was, all of a sudden I went into the tirade about, you know, some Falcon video pack 80 where, you know, actually was a throwback to Little League. We know. I didn't get to do little, you weren't part of the, you weren't on T ball or anything like that. Really? Look at me. Do I look like I was on Little League or T ball? Hey, excuse me. I have seen pictures of you when you were in high school and you weighed about 84 pounds. A shot up. Yes. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. My big Jordan night hair and my Zeke have reached he's going with my hands up in the air. I'm in gym class. Well, there had been a time. I'm sure when you were little that your parents might have thought you were going to be butche and maybe put you in T ball. I didn't know. I was in Cub Scouts. Shut up. Well. You learned the bear skin all the way to we blow. I'm sure you. I'm sure we. Right. Did any of your boy's downstairs look like Alec Baldwin. No. Canteen boy. Canteen boy. They all kind of like Merle Haggard. Oh God. Not Merle Haggard. What was the guy that was the guy that was no not Chris Lee Adams. What was the guy that was the spin off Merlin Olson? The guy that used to be at home. The guy that used to do that he was on the little house on the prairie spin off. It was like father Bob or father Jim or something and he used to sell the, he used to sell the flowers in the coffee mug for FTD. Are you still doing the commercials where you would say it was a little pick me up. Yes. Yes. Yes. I know you're talking about Mr. Keller. He was the, he was the head of my troop or cave or whatever the hell they called them. You know. The cave. Cause the caves on gay reference now since there's bears and cubs. Like is that like the name of a club or anything? I'm sure there is a bear cub somewhere in the world that is called the cave. Oh yeah. No doubt. No doubt. If you ever frequent of gay club called the cave, please call, please tell us about it. I've taught us my co-pilot at touchybail.com. Let us know. I have a question for you guys. Okay. And the question would be, I have to find it now. Only our doctors know for sure. No. I received a book for Christmas from one Miss Lola Lafayette and it is called The Little Book of Stupid Questions. Uh huh. And I have decided that I'm going to ask you a question because I didn't think I had anything to talk about this week. But apparently I did, but that's fine. Would you prefer your mate to be stupid and beautiful or intelligent and ugly? I don't have that problem. Stupid and beautiful. Okay. Mine is both stupid and ugly. At least tell me he's in the room right now. I rather, honestly, I think probably ugly and it's me and intelligent. Yeah, because in the long run, pretty is nice, but pretty is going to get boring really quick. See, I have you guys to keep me entertained. So I'm going with pretty, you know what I was going to say, I was going to watch yourself. Now in the long run, like if you were going to be with this person for like 30 or 40 years, you'd really want them to be stupid. I guess you, but on the flip side, you can teach someone to be smart. You can't teach someone to be pretty. So. That's not true. Exactly. Yes. You can teach somebody to be pretty. Well, yes, but not if they're, you know, wow, love it. I mean, wow, love it. Look at his vows. Good as he's going to. It's still kind of scary looking yet, you know, yes, you can better someone's the way they look. But I think your chances are probably bettering the way someone is, you know, articulates. What is the strangest place you've ever been naked? All right. It's just as where's the strangest place you've ever been naked? I know the strangest place I've ever been at somebody naked with me. No, I know the strangest place I've ever been naked. Okay. Go ahead. Where's that? Um, in a haunted house I was volunteering at. Oh, I remember that story. Oh my gosh. I forgot all about that story. Oh, dear. You and I, you and I have to talk later. I have made out with a guy that was a, um, that he was volunteering to. It was, it was a benefit for my work and he and I were in the rooms, the next rooms to each other. We were talked between when people would come in, I think, led to another. We ended up in the bathroom giving each other handies. Were you completely naked? Um, my pants were down around my ankles and so were his. Oh, well, shit. If that's what we're talking about. God. Yeah, right? Goodness. God. I would say probably the most interesting place that I was completely naked was Hyde Park and London back in the 80s. The first time I was ever eaten out, I was talking about that, like, one of the first episodes. I know, I know. And I was, I was completely naked except for a bra. So that's pretty completely naked. Okay. But as far as like being completely, completely naked. Hmm. Okay. Rodan. Well, the, it, the most interesting place I've been naked is actually not that interesting, but the results kind of were, um, about three weeks before, no, about a week before, um, autumn terms started for my freshman year at Eckerd. I went to the, I went to Playlinda, which is the nude beach over in Cape Canaveral with my boyfriend at the time, who's still in high school. I think he was a junior that I met through like the Delta youth thing and that was in Orlando. Earwax, boy. If you remember, I want to know why he had the threes. I think Taylor gave it to him. Well, because, because Rodan and Earwax, boy had a three way with my first boyfriend at a party that I was having in my roommate's bedroom while I was drunk, passed out in the other room. Not that I would have necessarily joined in on that, but that was not that he's bitter or still holding on to that at all. No. Yeah. He sold off that a little bit, but I got naked on the nude beach and I got burnt everywhere so that the first week of freshman term or autumn term at Eckerd college, I was peeling. Did your penis peel? Yes. Oh, God. It was my penis was my penis was so burnt. How burnt was it? And that's the other title for episode, pretty soon. Like, okay, now I'm going to ask you a serious question that you're going to get a lap, but I mean, if you have a sun burnt, you can put like aloe vera on it, but then I've heard that you can't put certain things down there because it kind of burns. Could you put something like aloe vera on your dick or would that burn or what did you do? Like, I don't know. I did put aloe vera on pokey, but uh, okay, you're a grown man for Christ's sakes. Come up with a better name than pokey. I still like pokey. It's really kind of what he is. Oh, God. He's the little orange horse from from Gumby. Jesus. I missed three ways really, not the movie three some, but you missed the orgies. I've never been in an orgy. Thank you very much. I think any time you have sex with more than one person, it's an old, no, no, no, it goes to, you have to have, you have to have more than you have to have four or more. No, because a four is a forgy. Okay, a five G. Okay, no, five. Then that gets good. I think that would be considered an orgy. That would be an orgy. I think you would. Well, you would know. Or. Hey, hey, hey, hey, I actually don't miss three subs. I don't know. Is someone always getting left out in a threesome? Not when I'm around. Because his ass has got room for me. Hey, wow. Thank you. Rode down. He's a gentleman. He's set it up. It's the Eiffel Tower. Viva la France. Viva la France. I used to find cards that were the Eiffel Tower and send them to drum and drum and tailor and say, thinking of you. Oh. Do you know what an Eiffel Tower is? Rodean? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You told me. I never heard it. Okay. We'll explain to the listeners then what an Eiffel Tower is. Who near him? Oh, go ahead. I see. I'm having trouble visualizing it, but it's essentially a guy in the front, a guy in the back and they high five over her head or his head or his head or my head. Oh, it's essentially what we use to find a willing. Wait, wait, wait, wait. You cast boys are coming down next week. Yes. Fire up those video cameras, boys. Yeah, right. Tank will never know what's coming. The next few cast will be, oops, I dropped my napkin ring. Did you get that? Sure. Taylor, no. Whoa, whoa, whoa, what's going on? Go over, go over, quick high five before he gets away from you. Click got it. That is one big hanging man. Raping straight guys is fun. Why am I laughing? Because it was your idea. Thank you. He's a little teeny kind of part of me that kind of enjoys the idea of tanking Taylor having sex. I know it's wrong. I know it's really sad. I know it's wrong. It'd be like, you know, kissing your brother, but he ain't my brother. He ain't heavy. He's my brother. Well, I used to have that about sprout. Like I would just, I really wanted to see someone else having sex with him. No, I don't want to see someone else having sex with him. I just, everyone's want to, it just gives me a little twinge of, I don't know, never mind. I was going to say that this has changed the subject, shall we? Oh, do you know what? I'm really excited about this week. What? Besides the fact that I'm like, that American Idol starts on Tuesday? Yes. Sorry. No, but, but thank you for that plug for us. Yeah. No, I'm, I'm really excited that I got a new set of pots and pans this weekend. Excellent. Well, fine. I bought the, there was a Wolfgang Puck set at Sam's Club stainless steel. It's very pretty, very pretty. So I cooked on it today and I think I ruined it already. Well, let me tell you something. I have the Wolfgang Puck stainless steel set. You cannot destroy it. You can beat the shit out of it. You can burn anything on it. They are the greatest pans in the world. Yeah. I love them. They're just so pretty. I just don't want to cook on them and ruin them. You can't ruin them. I'm telling you. Well, these are placed, the $25 canvas target set that I bought. You're that chef mate. Yeah. Oh my God. Yeah, no. It was the like dorm collection. I mean, it came with a like an eight inch frying pan and like a two quart sauce pan. It's all made of plastic. Pretty much. The teplon was finally wearing off and I'm thinking I really, I just really need upgrade. So and I have some dating offers and yeah, I have dating offers and I didn't actually go out on any this weekend. You gave poke arrest kind of you. I gave poke. Yeah, I'm sure you gave poke arrest on weekend. Don't forget I used to live next. I used to share a hallway with you. I believe you're the one who jerked off on he was in bed. Not the other way around. Let it go. Oh, yes. That's different. Now, in all fairness, it's not to say that I haven't jerked off in bed when he was. Oh my God. What? You've jerked off in bed with Tyler laying beside you. Are you serious? Well, I, well, I used to do things I didn't have no recollection of when I was. Oh, yeah. He has. I forgot about that. Yeah. No, so that's why it was so it's such great vindication because he used that against me for years and years and years. So the fact that I was able to say that I don't remember the story. That's the problem. I mean, I was. He was busy jerking up. How can you remember the. The story. I was, my mom was down visiting and I was sleeping in his bed with him while my mom had my room and I just remember feeling stirrings. The story is actually quite similar to the episode seven story. No, I know. That's why it was like, that was fun and like finally, but then I was kind of included in where he would sort of roll over and like hug on to me and I'm just sort of laying there like, you know, in my brain, I'm thinking, do I go for it? What do I do? Should I? Wait a minute. This is the second time. Okay. Because we had this big argument earlier on in one of the earlier shows about how many times that we've kind of messed around a little bit. That counting. No, that didn't count. That is one of the ones that counted out. Okay. Did you guys ever have like full penetrative sex? Oh God. No. No. Okay. That was a no and an. Big A. No, it's just an. Oh God. Penetrative. That's that sounds like I'm Jody Foster on a pinball machine in the accused. He's saying like that. Oh God. You're not sexy, Sadie. Come on. Come on, college boy. Rape is fun, not that we if that went totally offended everybody else in the world, that should be the. Not that we a pot is my co-pilot in any way, endures the act or, you know, thought of that, but you know, it makes a good funny. It does make a good funny and we don't cut funny to quote my. And we don't have funny. Funny. So speaking of cue cast, speaking of cue cast, um, cue cast and us apparently have a rivalry now with this whole review thing. Really. So it's like, what is it? Which is the point of where we even have theme music on their show now. Whenever they say pot is my co-pilot. And they talk about the fact that, you know, they have this many Facebook friends, we have this many Facebook friends and we have this many reviews and they have this many views. They play the family feud theme in the background. Oh, you have to, you really should not tonight because we're running a little long, but at some point you're going to have to tell your family feud story because I will tell you. Taylor did something really cool that involves a family feud. No, you didn't scratch that. You did something that. It's a long day. Come on. Never mind. Never mind. Never mind. Imagine. It was a match game. It was like family feud. What the fuck is she talking about? Okay. Taylor, you know how I have a secret, a love for Bob Newhart and Charlie Gibson? When I was little, when I was little, Richard, Richard Dawson, for a guy, I swear to God. Oh my God. That speaks volumes. When I was little, I used to think he was so cute. I can remember actually kissing the screen of the TV at my Aunt Francis's house because I thought Richard Dawson was so cute. It's wrong. It's wrong. It's wrong. And I explained what you are today. Good Lord. It was family feud. It was shock. Anyway, getting back to my point that I was trying to make, Q cast, yeah, Q cast is definitely trying to rev up some more reviews for iTunes and they're not even in our same category. Okay. They're in a completely different category. Okay. Everyone can love them and can love us. Isn't there enough love for the whole world? Can't we all just get along? Shut it. What I was trying to say is that we would love to have more reviews and we are actually currently at 68 reviews, which means somebody out there can have the opportunity to be the 69 reviewer. If that's not a motivation, I don't know what is. I think we should invite the 69th reviewer to do a spot on the show. No, but they can be the 69th reviewer. I know what. I would welcome maybe what should be our goal for the next week? 75? Is that asking too much? No, that's asking too much. Let's get to 70. I think that's asking too much. Let's see if we can get to 70, which is just two. Yeah. And also, I mean, I know that we have this, you know, this, you know, review wars, but I do want to say that if you listen to us, if you listen to any podcast and I mentioned this on the blog and you enjoy what they're doing, please leave them a review. I mean, it thrills me and Taffy and Rodin to no end when we check the reviews and see that the numbers have gone up. And I know that Kevin and Michael feel the same way when they get reviews. Taylor, Taylor will call me and go, we're up to 66. We're up to 67. Kevin and Michael don't get the joy as much as we do, but the fact is they still get reviews. Do you know why they don't get the joy as much as we do? Because they don't have as many reviews as we do. Oh, that's right. Oh, wow. In fact, we kind of get the happiness almost twice as much as they do. Oh, man. You know what? They get to have sex every once and while. I don't. This is my life. So actually, I believe you had sex last week. Oh, okay. So if you like what you're listening to, please, we weren't going to talk about that, please go to God is my co-pilot on iTunes and leave us a review and go to Q cast and go to it's not us. It's you and go to fellow monkeys and go to some of the other ones that I can't think of off the top of my head. And you know, just let them know how much you appreciate, you know, the work that they're doing. And again, we thank you for showing your appreciation for the work that we do as well. Yes, it's like podcast love for Valentine's Day. We're going to have to have a, you know, we should have a Valentine's Day episode where we talk about all of our old loves. That's an excellent idea. Okay. I will be sure to have the hot water going and the razor to open a vein after we get to the giving podcast, that sounds like a great idea. Now, I have certainly heard you talk about your ex loves. Don't you remember Mike, so and such in the taxi to the pizza hut in 10th grade? sophomore year. Okay. First of all, that was not where you're in college. Sure was. Oh, love love by a person, love by a person. Taylor the Latte boy story, love by a person. Rodianne, you are just what I needed today by darling. I hate you both so much, you know, good Lord. I was going to say, I think I actually have to have sex with somebody to be our listener this week. You're going to have sex with someone so they will be our listener. Don't you just said? I think so. Actually, it's somebody I met on mypartner.com and we've been talking for a little while. So, I don't have a nickname for him yet. I think I have to wait to meet him before I can come up with a decent nickname, but he started listening to our show and I think he's listening to our show to get background information on me before our show. Oh, what? Then it's your sure to have sex with him this week then. You'll be pregnant by signup. We've got like five titles for the show you have to stop. Oh, nice. Okay, bitches. What's the blog? Potismycopilot.com. What is our Myspace page? Crickets, crickets, crickets, crickets, crickets, crickets, crickets. I think it's Myspace.com maybe. Backslash Potismy Copilot. And where can they email us? At Potismycopilot@gmail.com. And what is the name of our Facebook group? Okay, so I love Potismy Copilot. Very good. God, we get gold stars today. Yeah. And you know what? Pretty soon? We're going to have a voicemail line. Can we call him? No. You and me to be studied. You're my best friend. Dear diary, you're my best friend. Nobody gets me like you do. I must be emo. All right, once again, I headed in my head that we're going to do a half hour show. We're almost at 50 minutes. So, thank you very much for, fuck you. Thank you very much for listening to episode 42 of Potismy Copilot. This is Taylor. Wait, is it 42 or 43? 42. Okay. This is Taylor. And Taffy. And Rodea. Good week, everybody. Bye bye. Bye bitches. Bye bitches. I was thinking of saying that too, but I'm always classy, always happy. Bye everybody. Always classy with Miss Taffy. Good Lord. Bye. Bye. a lot. a lot. (upbeat music) (upbeat music)