Pod Is My Copilot
PiMC: Episode 10 - The John Goodman Chronicles.....
It's a Beachcast, kittens! Taylor and Taffy head down to Clearwater, Florida for a free two night stay at a hotel (courtesy of Taylor's work), and they bring Lola Lafayette and Drum Riley Calhoun along for the ride. We ramble on for quite a while, talking about topics like John Goodman (not the actor...it will make sense), Judy Blume, 70s Soap Operas, Gorilla Salads and Clean Workspaces, Favorite Words, and yet another story that makes Taylor look crazy. Welcome our two first guest co-hosts, won't you? We are stong...we are in invincible, we are Pod Is My Copilot....(Oh, and look for Rodan in next week's episode) Music: Brain Bukit: Run Rabbit/The Chase.
[music plays] You're listening to "Pod is My Copilot" with Taylor the Latte Boy, Taffy Carlisle Hupington, and Rodin. [music plays] Okay, now. [laughs] I hate all of you. Hi, this is Taylor the Latte Boy, and you're listening to a very special beach episode of "Pod is My Copilot." She's not going to be able to talk to this whole entire person. She's not. She's just going to sit there and cry. Rock back and forth. Is there something you want to share with the group? No. [laughs] Is she making you rock hard? As I had said on the blog recently, I had won a trip, a two night stay out at the Clearwater Hilton, in beautiful Clearwater, Florida, and I asked some friends to join me, so Taffy is out here tonight. Hello, lovelies. Hello, this is Taffy Carlisle Hupington, and this is actually the first time that Taffy and I have taped an episode in the same room. We're so forward thinking. Okay. It's one of the few things you guys haven't done in the same room. It's because you guys are country before country was cool. We're country, y'all. Well, we also have some special guests in the house tonight, and that would be the very often spoken of but never heard from before. Lola Latte. Hello, everyone. [laughs] And Drum Riley Calhoun. Hey, y'all. [laughs] So we are all sitting around after having a lovely meal together at the restaurant in the hotel. We're all spent. Whoo. That sounds dirty. You just said we'd all done everything in a hotel room before, so it didn't turn your net. Okay. All right. Okay. So, and we spent some time out on the beach and hung out and talked, and then I thought it might be a good idea for us to start taping, because this was actually one of the apparently things that was a draw for Lola and Drum to come out to the beach was to be on an episode of the show. So they didn't want to hang out with us. No. They would come out and talk. Absolutely. I told you it's the only reason we came. Well, at least they were honest. Well, there you go. But I ain't one to gossip, so. [laughs] So, Lola, would you like to tell us anything about yourself? Um, no. Well, I think, as recently mentioned on the blog, she, the littlest little Lafayette, just graduated from high school. Yes, the big ceremony on Monday. Oh, congratulations. How does it feel being the mother of a high school graduate? Uh, hmm. I don't know. I don't think I can be the mother of a high school graduate, because I'm myself. I'm only 25 years old. Because she is still high school, because we are five years old. Okay. So, Drum, do you have anything that you'd like to add to the? About Lola? [laughs] Yeah, please. I can tell stories. Okay. Tell a story, but I won't. Thank you. So, both of you wanted to be in the episode, but neither one of you have anything to talk about. That's correct. Give us a topic, and we'll discuss. Okay. Freeways are neither free nor the way. Disguise. [laughs] Shut up. Why do we park on driveways and drive on driveways? [laughs] Rachel Ray. Everyday with Rachel Ray. I see Rachel Ray magazine. What do we think about Rachel Ray? Dumb-o. I think she's on crack. I like Rachel Ray. Do you like sitting and watching her whole entire show? Yeah, I do. Me too. All the time. Don't I? Yeah. And you don't find her the least kind of... Sometimes she's annoying. I find her very annoying. I used to love Rachel Ray. I find her very annoying. I find her very annoying. She's kind of become a character. That's exactly it. You see old episodes, right? Like Kelly Ripa. She's like calm and collected, and then a new episode, she's like, just a freak. Well, and also, you can also tell the new ones and the old ones, not just by the wedding ring, but 'cause the weight goes... And her hair gets big and flat and wide and blonde and black. And she's built like a 12-year-old boy, except with sort of boobs. I mean, she's kind of... But she's very... I don't know. She's too flighty or too weird or too odd to watch for the whole episode. A lot of the food network people, though, sort of become character. Well, Jiaara, with the head, and the smiling and the... No bother! No bother! Yeah, I can't do her. No. Or Walter Barrio. I can't watch him either. You know I'd rather step on my lips and speak bad about somebody, but my Paula? What's going on with the hair? Her hair is so big these days, but it's going on. Yeah, it's still blueish, purpleish, greyish. It's filled with secrets. I'm sure her head full of fun. I haven't watched a Paula episode, and I can tell you how long it's been. Well, you should watch some time, 'cause her hair is big as her kitchen. She was just on with one of the guys from Queer Eye on Oprah, judging some invention thing, and she was very, very... Big hair. She was big hair, and big bones, and big eyes, and... She's not a big bone gal for a while. No, but she was almost like... She was kind of possessed. She was talking to Banks on America. She was talking to Banks! Oh, we have to talk about her next time, huh? Don't can't be started. It's been nice talking to you all. Jazleen, Jazleen... The next name I'm going to call is... Jazleen! Yeah, no, it was wrong. The winner of America's Next Top. Top. Top. Moth. Dilt. Thank you. That was hot. Excuse me. German is such a delicate flower. He is. He's a petite flower. Yet to blossom. A lot blossom. I have the feeling part to him have been defloured long ago. Drum several parts of him. So, let's see. What else can we chat about? Do we have any questions that we want to ask them? Have you and Drum have ever been in a relationship for our listeners who don't know you? Yes. Drum and I are exes. So... Long. But do all your exes live in Texas? No. No. No, they live in my house. Oh, that's so... Coming up in our door. We've been waiting for you. No, but we have another... Two more weeks. That's it. Another acquaintance. Sounds like someone's been counting the days. I mean, there's a count for someone with big red exes across days. Well, if I must admit it, it's 13 days. But that's okay. We have another acquaintance who, when their relationship broke up, they remained in the same house for a while. That's true. Who? Who? John Goodman. Oh, John Goodman. John Goodman would remain in the house with... It's not the actual John Goodman, of course, so please don't sue us, John. But it is a friend of ours, and she's a lovely girl. And yes, she does look like John Goodman. We lovingly refer to that. John Goodman. John Goodman. Behind her back. She would never be able to find out how to find this. So we don't have to worry about her listening to it. Actually, she'd never be able to find her back. So... Or... Except you do know what's going to happen. As soon as these two get to Orlando, they're going to play this for her. No. Never. But she still won't know who we're talking about. She's not that bright. Tell me, guys. Tell me. Tell me, Karen. Why are you calling me Karen? Because it's your middle name. Uh-huh. We have another friend whose name is not Karen, but if any of you have ever heard the Dane cook thing about the friend that nobody likes... She is a bag of douche. (laughter) So, and he uses the... Karen is the example. And so we have this other friend that we call Karen sometimes, and she doesn't understand why we call her Karen, but it's because we don't like her. But fortunately, her middle name really is Karen. And fortunately, she is a bag of douche. (laughter) It's a win-win. Yeah. So we have John Goodman and Karen. Mm-hmm. And John Goodman's betrothed or ex-betrothed stayed in the house for how long? Well, he refused to move out until they could figure out how much equity they had in their home, and that she would come up with half of it to get it into leave. But then one night, she came home and her car was gone, because we had parked it in the alley behind her house. So we all went there, and the cops came, and we're sitting there in the car waiting for a come-out, and the police officer walks out and hands me a gun. And I said, "What?" I had to apparently protect the gun and keep it out of the house because it was under the waterment. Because apparently, she has one half of Boris and Natasha, and at least you walk around handing her guns all day. She's the sheriff. She's the sheriff. Oh God. Well, Rodan's not here tonight, so I have to make some bad '80s sitcom reference. That was quite a bit. How is Rodan feeling? Rodan is doing much better. He had his surgery. They actually found three fractures instead of two fractures, so it took them a little bit longer in surgery, and then... Yes? Yes? I had to think for a second. Focus. Focus. Focus. So then they had to give him more. If you can remember him taking focus back to your focusing on and on, you don't need focus back to her. They ended up giving him some really good meds, so I've talked to him a couple nights, and he's sorry he couldn't be here, and I think he's a little sad that he can't be part of this podcast. Yeah, he'll suck it up. Yeah. Okay. I just remember she said it. I didn't. I believe that Lola had the same problem that Rodan has. I did, however, I wasn't sent home after two hours. Yeah, exactly. I was in the hospital for five days and had nine weeks of physical therapy. Is Rodan going to physical therapy, do you know? I don't know if he has some physical therapy, but I don't think it's nine weeks. Nine weeks. How did you break your ankle? I was walking and I tripped and fell. Oh. Great story. I broke. I mean, that's honestly what happened. I broke both bones that hold your foot to your leg, and my foot really did flop her out and get that bench. Okay. From now on, that story is going to be, I was punching, jumping out of a hot air balloon. How old were you? I was. This was in 1988. So I was. Four. So you were 19 years younger than you are now. Correct. Okay. That is correct. Which way she was born? Trauma's so quiet. Trauma's quiet. Well, I didn't break my ankle. That was actually the third time I broke my ankle. You almost broke mine? That time you pushed me down the stairs. I pushed you down the stairs. Yeah, but you remember? Well, when I was standing at the top point, harder, harder, and you hit him one time. No, that time I sprained my ankle, and I jokingly told everybody you pushed me down the stairs. Oh. Because I fell down the stairs. Now, you know, you almost broke your ankle at the bowling alley. That's true. I did. I stepped in a hole. Walking. Walking. Walking. I don't think I would have. He would have never been hurt from again if you'd fell in a hole. The particles were the same too. Oh. Because you do need an oyster knife to get in there. Oh. And I set the gloves. Well, I was walking back to my car and I stepped in the hole, and my whole foot turned black. Oh, God. It was horrible. It was pretty. But it turned black, black, and black. Now, I can now explain that black man, black man. I don't think that's true. I think you're a black man. Where did you come from? But, you know, Lola doesn't know the love of the black man. The sweet bitterness of chocolate love. You know. Yeah, this is never going to be hurt by you anymore. I'm already editing out big trenches. I've already heard it all down, so. Minute three through nineteen. Basically, you'll hear it. The intro. All of our names are then. Thank you for listening. I thought it was my co-pilot. Deany, but Deany. Deany. I like our music. I was going to change the theme music, but I thought you should keep it. It was sounding no from Taffy and Urband. We would like that. Because it's very, it's, you know it's us. And you know it when we're getting ready to end and I like it. It's our brand, our trademark. Even though somebody else wrote it. Right. Something we can have shirts to pause my co-pilot. Okay, get on that. I make sure they have really tight necks. Oh, yes, please. Mock Turtle Neck. Mock Turtle Neck. Well, that's what a mock Turtle Neck is. [laughter] Or I have a completed version to anything around my neck. Any kind of collar, any kind of shirt, any kind of necklace makes me gag. Except for husbands' thighs. [laughter] They are creamy. [laughter] Hello. Good morning. So Drum and Lola are going to Orlando with friends of ours, including Karen and John Goodman in a couple weeks. Absolutely. And are you excited about this trip? Absolutely. Anything to get away for a while. And what are you going to do? We are going to go shopping. We, meaning Drum and I. We, meaning collectively. To get away from John Goodman and Karen. Absolutely. I have the feeling that John Goodman will find a way to get into that car. Uh, no. I don't think so. Uh, I bet you will. [laughter] No. I don't think so. Are you two of me in the same room? Because if not, she will be wise. There's five bedrooms and no. There's only like six of us. Oh, hold on. That's good. None of us really need to share. Except for the one couple that is going in, I'm sure they will share. They might be the ones that want to get away from each other, quick ask. Very possible. [laughter] But yes, we'll be doing shopping and we'll be cooking dinner. We're going to be having a summer, a welcome summertime theme. Hamburg is hot dogs. All good summertime food. Are you going out? Are you going dancing and going to a club? We still have those passes for Pleasure Island, so. That's very true. Pleasure Island is a nightclub up in Orlando. Not far from us. Owned by. Disney World. Disney. Yes. It's part of downtown Disney. Yes. What stories that have come out of Pleasure Island, do you like to share a story? Yes. John Goodman was performing a sexual act behind one of the bars. And again, no relation to the actual John Goodman. I thought John Goodman was in the DJ booth given the DJ. I believe that was another trip. Oh, okay. And that's when John Goodman was still had their clothes on when we were there. And the security guy came and got her and said, "Hello, I'm glad to see you tonight." With your clothes on. But what happened the night before leading up to that? She was naked in the bathroom of eight tracks, which is the disco bar. Wasn't she naked in the men's bathroom room? I'm not sure I was there. And this was when my child and Karen's child was with us. So it was. That's classy. With a K. It's classy. I can't. Oh, God. Do you have any Pleasure Island story drama? Um, I only, the only thing I really remember of Pleasure Island is you all making fun of the way I was dancing at the BET Club. I don't remember that. I don't even remember. I hope to be with you. Yes, we did. Remember, you make kind of me dancing like this with my little hands up. I think we might have actually done that. Yes. Perhaps that was Taylor and his Go Wide Boy. Go Wide Boy. Go Wide Boy. Go Wide Boy. Go Wide Boy. I do not dance with glow sticks. They are imaginary glow sticks. He's got glow sticks. He likes to dancing with himself. Oh, oh, oh. But when we all came in. I was thinking about what story that you told about with the businessman and you were all dancing in BET. Oh, no. That was not BET. That was eight tracks. With all the what insurance form. Was it like. Merlinch. Yeah. Merlinch. When they all came and they had a big convention there and they were all in love with us and we were whipping their ties off and spinning them around and smacking on their bets with it. They all loved us. Sometimes at night. I'm quite sure we are on the Internet somewhere. I'm quite sure that we are still on someone's wallpaper on their laptop. Exactly. And this poor gentleman, tell them what you said. He said, hey, we were dancing with him and having a good time and just being flirtatious and nothing too serious and he was very, very thankful that we were being this way. We couldn't quite understand why. He said that his wife would not even rub suntan lotion on his back. Let alone get out and dance with him on a dance floor. You know what? Karen's husband went one time and he got down on one knee and saying, I think I love you by David Cassidy and she got mad at them. She said get up off the floor. Which is why she is a bag of douche. Yeah. Do you have any pleasure on the story? That's not the story that I was talking about. But I can't give away. If I'd say this story that this happens and I give away the punch line. All of you were dancing in a circle and a gentleman was standing behind you and yelled something out into the crowd. You know that was in mannequins when we were all having... Very lemon drop. Very lemon drop shots and the bartender had told us that in order to have a proper raspberry lemon drop it was very, very cold outside when we had come inside to get warm. He said well if you want to get warm the best way to do this is to put the sugar on your friends neck and lick it off. So of course Lola and I were... Body shots. Body shots. So we were having such a good time and all of us, there was a bunch of us there, had had many, many shots and we were laughing and none of us were driving. We had hired a bus for the night and a very large man behind all of us went I love lesbians. And so of course all of us cracked up and was laughing. He's like I want to hang out with you guys so bad. We're like come on. We don't care. No more to marry her. Are you going to buy us a shot? Come on. But you cannot lick me. I'm sorry. The only one that's allowed lick me is Lola and only on my neck. Unless she asks nicely. I remember the first time I ever went to Pleasure Island with Taylor and he thought he lost his ID. Oh god. Two and a half hours I spent looking for the ID and it was actually in his Lola. I had a lot to dream about. You were hysterical and beside yourself. Well because it was like the first time that you and I had gone away at any place and I was meeting all these new people and this was because I had met the shut up. I was not going to touch it to me. I had met. What's your name? Taffy is the first time that night and the first thing she says to me is. Hello I'm Taffy. Have a shot. Yes. So we started doing shots and then all of a sudden we were going to Pleasure Island and I put my wallet so that I would not lose it in a special section of my wallet that was like behind things. You put your wallet in special section of your wallet. I put an ID in my special. Everything he has is in a special section. Keep your wallet there. Nice. Decline. Decline. Approved. And then I realized that I had. And actually Karen was the one that walked around with me while I looked for it. And then I realized. For at least an hour. She's such a good friend. That's how Ruka quieted it. Crickets. Crickets. Yeah. That actually is a great John Goodman story. Go ahead. So we are all in a car driving through North Carolina. We are going on a road. What? Skunk Hill. Skunk Hill. Driving to Skunk Hill which she is a friend of ours. She has a cabin up in the mountains. Skunk Hill is not a friend of ours. You could be referred to as Skunk Hill I guess. Well. Driving to a friend of ours who owns a cabin called Skunk Hill in Franklin, North Carolina. Her address. The money is on the top right. Because the money on the dresser. We can just refer to her as the mountain. So and John Goodman was in the car. So John Goodman tends to not speak a lot. So unless spoken to because she's kind of creepy like that. No we're talking. We've been in the car for approximately six to eight hours at this point. So Taffy pulls out her book of if which is the book that she often asks Rodan and I questions from when we end a podcast. So during this ride she's asking questions and I will give an example of what happened. So if you could pick one person to spend a year with on a desert island. Who would it be? Taffy. My husband. Your husband. Jason Priestley. I would say Ben Affleck. John Goodman. Okay. Yeah. It was pretty much dead silence. So to every question with the exception of one if memory serves. I don't remember what question she answered you. Who's the most important person in your life. Oh yeah. Her guy daughter. Who was Hana. Hana. No we don't say her name. Oh because nobody knows. Like six months old or something like that. Six hours old. Yeah. And then proceeded to talk about how we didn't understand the responsibilities of being a Godmother. Yet everyone in the car was essentially a parent. Yeah. And to which level referred turned around and said as opposed to the responsibility of being an actual parent. So. And why we still keep this person around well. Entertainment value. That's all I can say. I'm sure she has a good heart. She does have a good heart. I don't say I think she has a good heart. She does. And she's a great gift giver. She gives the best gifts ever. What about the gift she gave me? What are you trying to say? No. She's lovely. She always brings us trial size things like candles and candy bars and lotions. Dove Dove. Dove. One of each. And then goes into lip gloss. Very, very when I was with her a couple weeks ago, we were in a store and she found something that she had given to you, gentlemen, I believe during the last trip. A blowjob. Yes. Right. She had herpes. She had herpes in a store. She was very concerned about whether the male folk of our group. The man folk. A man folk. Um. Texas. Of their gift. Approved of their gift. I would never even remember what the gift was. I said, well, you know, they never said that. Tampons. Oh, that's what those came from. Tampons. No, what was it? Some kind of bod, body spray stuff. Oh, like, axe or something. Yes. Because men who are over the age of, you know, 15 are going to use axe. All she used were axe over my Burberry London. Thank you so much. Exactly. But, you know, it was connected to a key chain, a clip on key chain. Well, that alone made it worth 99 cents. That's right. They were $1. Thank you very much. We're Solomon at Dollar General. Well, it's the thought account. Absolutely. Thanks, John Goodman. Thanks, John Goodman. Buck Buck! I have a question for everyone. And that question would be if you could only read one book for the rest of your life. What book would it be? Oh, why are you shaking your head? Well, why would she read a book because it's any good? I'm going to make it in a miniseries. Thank you. Are you looking to me? I'm looking for anybody. Anybody want to answer it? Why would you want to read a book over and over and over and over because you know how it's been? Okay. What is your favorite book then? I've heard about you people. I've heard about you people. I've heard about you people. I've heard about you people. Yes. I read "Are You There Got It's Me" Margaret. Because all of my friends read "Are You There Got It's Me" Margaret. I wanted to be in on the group. Unfortunately, all of my friends were girls. Nobody explained me why they all read it. But you learned about periods? I did learn about periods because at the end, she looks in underpants and there's a spot of blood. She don't talk confused and then she's all excited because she's actually having a period. I've ruined the book for any 14-year-olds who might be listening to the podcast. Read forever. It's a lot better. You get to learn about Ralph. Do you know that we had a sign, our parents had a sign of permission. So for us to be allowed to check that out of our library at our high school and our high school. This is back in the mid-80s. But I mean, that's not that kind of thing. Did you have, never mind. Did I have to, what? I'm not his thing. Okay, you did. I was going to say, did you have to sign a permission? Did your parents have to sign a permission ship to allow you to date your teacher? I did not date my teacher. You fucked him. I did not. I went to a dance and I went to eat a couple times. A couple times. Okay. And by dance, she means sex. Did you go to eat with someone a couple times? No, it is not the same. It is not the same as watching TV, though. Do you know what is going on? No, no, no. I can't say you make the rabbit ears. And he was very close. And I was 17 and he was 21. So it was not like it was completely gross. Even though technically he was my science teacher at the point. Okay. And his name was Mark. I didn't say his last name. Okay. And he was very nice. I don't know if I'm bad about it. Good. All right. And sucked at me, Puzzy. Wow. I'm pretty sure he was probably gay, actually. Oops. Fuck. Which explain what's my fascination with? The gay. Taylor and George Michael. Because we're gay here at the Sunny Motel. Drum. Favorite book? Favorite Judy Bloom book? I read forever, but it wasn't a favorite. What is forever about? Oh, please let us tell you. Okay. There's an older sister and a younger sister and the younger sister goes to camp. And the older sister has a boyfriend. And they have sex. And she describes it in where she looks at his face, why they're having sex. And his eyes are half closed. And she thinks everything's weird. And she wants to put the aftershave on his balls. He's afraid that it'll burn. And so he has to not do it. And he has a blot of the sides of a watermelon. Yeah. And then the little sister-- Why does she want to put the aftershave on his balls? Because they're in the bathroom and she wants to do it. And he says, go ahead. And then he goes, no, wait. They'll sing. And the little sister likes to crochet and macrame. And she puts like little blue mushrooms on the pockets of her jeans. And she wears them on the date. And everything's great. But then she goes to summer camp to be a counselor. And she meets another boy. I think-- And then her grandfather dies. And when they show up to see her and the boy are holding hands. And they drop their hands really quick. Because now everyone knows her. I'll find the book. I haven't-- Who does the older sister? The older sister. The older sister. Who has had sex. And Ralph is the name of his penis. Wow. [LAUGHTER] We're talking about-- This was in 1981 or 2001. Or 2001. I read it. It was in the '70s. Yeah. They did make it into a Made for TV movie. But-- They did? Yes, absolutely. Because any books that are done are going to be made into a Made for TV movie. It's just like how to eat fried worms. That's a real movie. And that was our first book that I ever read. Wasn't that Beverly Cleary? Mm-hmm. Yeah. It's a great book. And Ramona. It's a super fudge. Super fudge. See, to see "Tales of Fourth Grade," nothing is my favorite reading book. I love that book. Never read it. And then "Super Fudge." And then apparently there was a-- With Peter Hatcher? You never read "Tales of Fourth Grade." No. Oh, that's awesome. When was that book out? Like when you guys were in fourth grade? I thought I was probably married and already-- [LAUGHTER] She is elderly. [LAUGHTER] Yeah. No, "Tales of Fourth Grade" I think is a great book. I love all Judy Bloom books. Except I never ever liked "Dini" or "Tiger Eyes." I didn't read "Dini" at all. I never read "Tiger Eyes." I think I read "Dini." Is "Dini" about the girl with the black family that lives and moves up the street? I have no idea. I couldn't tell you. I'm lucky I read "Forever." Never heard of it. She read "Forever" just because there was sex involved in it. Absolutely. I'm sure one of your friends, and I can think of the exact one that did it. One, yes, I know exactly who did it. Probably said, "You have to read this book because it's already in." She was like, "Give it to me." And then went to the bathroom at the roller skating rink and read it. [LAUGHTER] Like "Porkies." Oh, like "Porkies." Like your "Porkies" book that you read? My "Porkies" book. Which, by the way, they are releasing all three "Porkies" on DVD this Tuesday. Oh, Lord. I will never forget one. I was not able to see the movie, so I got the book "Porkies." And the very first chapter is called "Meet Me." [LAUGHTER] Oh, no. I will never forget that. I was in the fifth grade. They call you "Meet." "Meet." You can't take her into the bathroom. She's just a freshman. She's about to become an instant senior. [LAUGHTER] So you remember things when you read them. What are you looking at? I read things all the time. Okay. Well, what's your favorite book? You didn't answer the question. My favorite book of all time is the amazing adventures of Cavalier and Clay. I was thinking of that book. It is very good. And I didn't think I'd like it. What's it about? It is about two guys that are Jewish in the 1930s. And they become one of the creators of a bunch of different comic book characters. And the one is a Russian Jew, I think. And he experienced, you know, he had to get out of Russia before the Nazis came in and all this sort of stuff. And then, of course, one of them ends up being gay. So it's about gay guys and comic books and... Everything that you're fortunate. Yeah. And it's a really, I won the Nobel Prize, or the Pulitzer Prize. The Nobel Prize. [LAUGHTER] For Peter. It wasn't so high. [LAUGHTER] So, and it's a really good book. So, and it's by Michael Shabon. Shabon. So... Shabon. Shabon. Shabon. Shabon. Shabon. I'll have to give it a look, see. Probably not. I still have to get you to read week three. I almost brought week three for you to... Kings of O'Ranar. No, it's the book about the killer bunny. Thanks, Youtubai. That was a... [LAUGHTER] That's why I thought it was in the chair on Lost last weekend. Wait. Well, no, because he kept talking, he like has the bunny. The character Ben on Lost has a bunny and when in the flashback when he's a child, he kind of like sends the bunny through the electrical fence to make sure it works. And so, when the bunny makes it free, he grabs and puts it in his bag. And then, when they kind of get up to this old house and like a flash forward, and the adult business standing there, and he's like, "Look, it's my friend or whatever's in Jacob, and you don't see what's sitting in the chair." And for a second, I thought it might still be the rabbit, which kind of freaked me out a little bit. And then, when the house spoke and I thought with rabbit speaking, then I'm going to seriously be going down. [LAUGHTER] So, see? Kill rabbits. Okay. I wouldn't make my Python reference, but I can't because Lola has no tolerance for one of my life. Lola hates all things British and she hates all things soup. [LAUGHTER] I love soup. And the-- And the-- We both like soup. And Nicole Kidman. I dropped the microphone, sorry. She hates Nicole Kidman too. Oh, well. Well, that's becoming easier to do. Yeah. She's getting freakish looking. She is a ghost. With the eyebrows and the 14 layers of Botox on her face. And her hair is the same color as her skin. Right. And it starts back about here at about two o'clock. If you're looking at the side of her face as a clock. Because we're six head. That's right. She has an eight head. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] So, Lola, who do you think is hot? Who do you think we should add to the cute guys of the podcast? John Stamos. He's on there. I don't believe he is. I don't think John Stamos is on there. No, I don't think John Stamos is on there. I believe I've asked for him several times. I think Billy. Oh, I don't think you've asked for him several times. You've made him for him once. I think we should try twice. We should find a picture of his belly button on there. There's a video on the bell belly button. Well, then maybe we'll have to put the belly button. Because I have no idea what you guys are talking about, so. His belly button looks like Matt Rolloff's nose. I'm telling you. We put Josh on there for you. I put Josh on there for you. Josh. Read this husband. Oh, yes. Joshua. Joshua. His name is Josh in real life. He's hot. He's very, very handsome. When I looked him up, I was like, "Damn, he is cute." He's very cute. Break me off. He's a lot like you guys. I can't get past soap operas though. I just can't. I can't get past the music and the sappy stories and the really bad acting. I mean, I'm sure that if someone- Sounds like an afternoon with Taylor to me. Wow. And we're done with pot is my co-pilot. That's impossible because they have sex on soap operas. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Welcome to pot is my co-pilot with Lola Lafayette inside. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. I used to watch all my children. I was a huge all my children fan in college. Are you guys young enough or old enough to remember a soap opera college search for tomorrow? Mm-hmm. Search for tomorrow. Do you remember the love of life? No. My aunt Frances used to watch search for tomorrow. And all I remember is that back in like 1976 or whatever, I would have to go stay at her house during the summer and she would always watch search for tomorrow. And there was a baby face killer. And the edge of night and the doctor's always good one. The edge of night? That's right. I forgot about the doctor. My mom watched Ryan's Hope. Yeah. It was like Ryan's Hope. I met General Hospital in days of her life span. No way. The only ones that were ever on about around any of our aunts were always the CBS ones. The as world turns young and restless. My husband's grandma and grandpa to this day at one o'clock. You do not come to their house because they will both sit. His grandfather is obsessed with young and restless. And they can tell you every backstory on every character and how this family's done this family wrong and all those other w's that they're going, "I have to kill myself." No. But you know what? I'm quite positive of somebody who doesn't watch a lot of television, watch some of the shows we watch at night. They think the same thing. Bad acting. You know. Yeah. What? I'm an afternoon with Taylor. That's what I was thinking. I'm sorry. That's the name of our new podcast. This episode, an afternoon with Taylor, is both delightful and sappy at the same time. It's better than cool and grotesque. That's an afternoon. John Goodman. Wow. vagina talk with John Goodman. Oh. Come on now. We've all seen way too much of that vagina. Thank you. The grille salad. Now you get mad when I call it the real salad. I figured I would do it before you did it. Like buckwheat in the headlock. Oh. That's not strong. But remember? Buckwheat is now shape ball. Buckwheat is she. Oh. No. John Goodman decided that she would announce to all of us that. I got a Brazilian. She had a Brazilian except her suitor of the moment is the one that gave it to her. What? Yes. Yes. Because he liked it. Fresh. Better naked baby. And we both said I don't know if I would let someone I have known for 30 years do something like that to me. Let alone someone I have known for. 30 minutes. 30 minutes. That I picked up on this little website called Myspace. I got to tell you. Would you ever let somebody shave you chacha? I don't think so. No. Would you? Would you guys ever let anybody shave around your business? I think our business is a little different than your business. But people still cut and shave it. I mean girls still have things you can do. Well if they had the intention of cutting my penis off maybe I wouldn't be concerned. Would you let a grater who wanted to shave your balls? Would you let them? Probably. Really? You wouldn't be scared to death? No. Really? You have an incredibly incredible level of trust because I... Is it because it would be a male or would you let a female do that or would you think that a female you're not... Right now we're going to race her. Right now we're going to race her. I'm going to race her. You're going to blow her. The podcast is going to take a drastic turn now. Hit the video camera because it's a video podcast. We shave Drums Balls. Maybe it's because you can see what you have and you can see and make sure that they're doing a job that's delicate whereas we would be on complete and utter blind face. That makes me very nervous. Very very nervous. I don't know. Can you all see my balls anyway? Who had? On more than one. On more than one billboard. That's not the point. They could be seen from space. Would you let someone shave your business? Taylor? Maybe he has. No. You have freshly shined. Me? No. Okay. You should step back and say what? I really don't want my business shaved. Okay. If somebody decided they wanted to. I got to tell you, yeah, there's no way I would ever shave mine because... God. They didn't return. No, no, no. That I died period would not be good. Yeah, ages. Uh-oh. Yeah, you have that there for a reason and that business needs to be a little, yeah. No. See, that was the problem Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan. All of them got in. If they had had little business going on down there, you wouldn't be able to see y'all. God gave them because they've been stuff covered in up. That's right. It's like, it's gross. Well, I don't like the giant as anything. Girl parts for you guys out in there. But when they make it like that, they just don't look right. Just not. What are they look like? I melted candle with hair in it. That was... Bored upside down butt cake made out of ham. Oh! No. That's not right. That's not right. That's not right. Do you want to know what it looks like? Yeah. I don't want to talk about it. No, it doesn't look like a starfish. That's the other... That's around the corner. Oh my god! No, no, no, no, no. No lemonade around the corner. Chocolate's made? Thank you. Yeah, this is never gonna be here. Oh, it's fantastic. I don't know what that is. There are parts of it. No. Again, this is Patamico Patamico. Patamico. He's the Nazi editor. Why not? The Nazi editor. We'll see. Mm-hmm. Yeah, when you two leave, we're gonna do our own part. [laughter] Oh, lord. Oh. What's our time? I don't know. Let's see. We are at... Oh, god, we're at 39 minutes. Oh, we're good. We could talk for days. Yeah. We could talk for days. Do you have any other questions? Do you have any other questions? We both have asked a question. Would you guys like to ask anything? Mm-hmm. Of the group. Um, Taylor, what is your favorite word in the English language? [laughter] The first word that came to mind is cocksucker. [laughter] Okay. But I never used that word. She couldn't ask what your favorite pass down most. And, um... His favorite words are power bottle. [laughter] I want to be A. And Ms. Daffy? Yes. Oh, my favorite word? Mm-hmm. It's sappy. Okay. I would probably say laughter or laughing or anything that makes someone laugh. Okay. Because it's very hard to be sad when you're laughing. Because laughter through tears is my favorite emotion. But no, I would say laughter. All right. And drum. I don't think my favorite word will come as any shock to any of y'all. And, actually, it's two words. Oh. Motherfucker. [laughter] Because... Ask the motherfucker. Motherfucker. I must, um... What are yours? I must thank Taylor for my new favorite word. Which is? Or my new set of favorite words. I do not go through a day without saying fucking fuck, fuck, fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. I don't care where I am. I don't care what I do. I draw my favorite clip on the floor. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. I can't open something fucking fuck, fuck, fuck. I just wanted to thank you. You're welcome. I'm your second closest favorite. God damn it. God damn it. That is one of the first things that Taylor ever said to me when I met him. But he didn't actually say directly to me. He was speaking to the refrigerator. But that's all. Well, tell that story. Dear listeners, you have to understand that drum and load the work together, as well as have been friends for about, since God was a drum. Well, I've known each other for 17 years. Mm-hmm. Absolutely. There was a cell of, there was a party over at drum and Taylor's house. And, um, I was invited with John Goodman. What's John Goodman there? John Goodman was there. She's just so memorable. You forgot. And, um, I remember your purse. She was part of a buffet table. Yeah. I mean, she was a buffet table. [laughter] Oh, God. [laughter] I'm good, Laura. [coughing] And, um, I walked. Taylor made it a moment. I made it a moment. I'm alright. Go ahead. I walked into the party and I was carrying a purse that Taffy had given to me. And it was a black and white per, dog purse from the big dog store. And I walked into their front door and the first thing that Taylor said to me was, "Oh, my God! I love your purse!" And I probably said it just like that. [laughter] Oh, my God! So then, probably an hour, hour and a half into the party. Everybody was having a good time, having some cocktails, gnashing on some snacks. All of a sudden, the whole house starts to ring in here. God did it! And we look into the kitchen and Taylor's yelling into the refrigerator and drum is just standing. They're pretty much shaking his head. [laughter] What have caused this outburst? Actually, to this day, I'm not quite sure. I think I opened the refrigerator door and somebody had sort of tilted a beer or a beer. I just remember a broken bottle, like a broken bottle of beer or something on the floor. Well, Taylor was already on edge because that was the first dinner party that we ever tried to throw. Taylor was on edge? And we had been fighting the entire day. Which explains their current relationship situation, but I think it is. That was like seven years ago. Exactly. It was at the very beginning. That was our first. That was the first time I decided to ever make anything from a recipe. And of course. I picked something out of Martha Stewart living. Oh, of course. What did you pick? You picked Paris Charlotte. Oh, God! [laughter] I was in tears. I was in tears and I don't understand how people do this all the time. It didn't turn out. They turned out awesome. They were really good. They turned out awesome. But it was... We had to peel and core like... 5,000 pairs. It was something like 25 pairs or something. [laughter] Or like 1,000 whichever as well. It was insane. It felt like fun. We were up until four in the morning the night before snapping green beans and doing all sorts of... Snap beans. Snap beans. Snap beans. Did we have beans? We had, yeah. I don't remember. I remember that because that was the last thing that we did. All I remember is hooters, lanes and your stinking pair of things. I remember one time we were in Orlando or somewhere and that was the job we gave to Karen was to snap all the green beans. Because she can't cook so we told her she could snap the green beans. I think you need to tell one last story and that would be the John Goodman shrimp story when she made dinner. Oh, and maybe I should warn you about our next Orlando trip. Oh no. Please help me. Tell the shrimp story. I already told her what she was making. Yeah, but she changed her mind. It's just she wants to become prepared. Already prepared. Tell the shrimp story. Tell the shrimp story. Tell the shrimp story. How far ahead of time. Oh, week and a half. Three weeks ago. She probably already made us damn beans and we're still not going for two weeks. A couple years ago, we were staying at Clorder Beach again, a bunch of us, and we were going to be celebrating Karen's birthday. And Karen's birthday was near Mardi Gras, although I don't really think it is. We were just having a Mardi Gras party and it happened to be Karen's birthday. It was August, but we decided that it was a Mardi Gras party. So we had this big Mardi Gras party. It was the voodoo lounge. Yep. Everybody was cooking different things during Mardi Gras or that are native to New Orleans. And John Goodman decides that she's going to make shrimp. Shrimp and linguine. Or some kind of cream sauce. Something. Okay. And she shows up to prepare her dish, which the rest of us have been cooking all day. It's taking just a tremendous number of hours preparation. And she walks in with a large Ziploc bag of pre-cooked shrimp, not frozen and devanged and peeled. Already boiled. And another Ziploc bag of already cooked linguine. That had been done about two or three days prior to her arriving. Yeah. It had sat in her car all the way out. Mmm. And then proceeded to want us to eat it. Yeah. It's almost as good as the stuffed mushrooms. She made one time. Ooh. Not strong. Not strong at all. So you have given her an assignment to bring to Orlando next month? I said make baked beans. I figured how hard is that? And tell me she has not already started making them. Well, she has obtained a recipe from her sister-in-law. And she was telling me all the ingredients that it takes. And she said, well, perhaps I'll cook the ground beef ahead of time. It takes roll that beautiful beef. (laughter) And perhaps- Is there supposed to be ground beef in beans? I don't want to say that. I don't want to say that. I'm a bacon. I just said, you know, I don't really don't think it takes that long to brown a pound of ground beef. Like three minutes? So perhaps you could do that there or even do it in a crock pot. But you might have to drink it. (laughter) And so I'm trying to convince her not to be so prepared because- Because you know that she will do it on Tuesday night. And we will be there Saturday. (laughter) Indeed. I would make sure you all have a tennis shot or something because- (laughter) Not so many beans. That might be a problem. Yeah. But again, big heart. She means well. Absolutely. She's just an idiot. (laughter) Oh boy. I think it's time to wrap up this episode of pot is my co-pilot. I think we bored Taylor. No. You haven't bored me, but- I just woke him up. certain people complained for the first episode because we were so long and- I believe that would be a low laugh at it. Well, it was a little drag on-ish. (laughter) I think we prefer the terms drag queen-ish. (laughter) So as always, you can email us at potismycopilot@gmail.com. That's the only one I know by heart. (laughter) Or you can go to myspace@myspace.com/potismycopilot or as always go to our blog which is oksopodcast.blogspot.com. So for the entire pot is my co-pilot crew, this is Taylor. And Taffy. And Lola. And Rome. Saying good night everybody. Good night everybody. Good night everybody. Bye. (music)