Butts in the Seats Podcast
Big Man, Tiny Car (5/29/2000 Nitro)
(upbeat rock music) (upbeat rock music) - Welcome to the Buds DeSeats podcast, episode number 110. - What does that mean, Nick? - It means I had to go, oh shit, it's shot time. - It's shot time, baby! - Let's do it. - All right, I've not had. (laughing) - Well, I was here too. Cheers. - I feel like the base of a tropical drink. Anyway, tell everybody what you just made us. - So that was pinnacle whipped and marshmallow liqueur. - Yeah, we keep finding new reasons or new ways to use pinnacle whipped, and it's always delicious. - But hello, I'm Nick, alongside Emily. - Hello. - And the occasional squeaky out of unearthless. - Yeah, we have made him step aside at this point. So hopefully no more squeaks, maybe some barks from downstairs, but we'll see. - Today, we're here to talk about the May 29th, 2000, W.W. Monday nitro. Actually, not a terrible show. - It's debatable. - We disagreed a little bit. Some high highs and some low lows. - It's a show, it is something, I don't know. This show had such chaos energy to the point where like, my notes are kind of useless. I'm going off of my memory and hoping that you took really detailed notes, 'cause you usually do. 'Cause I couldn't keep track. I couldn't take note to everything. It felt very early days nitro where it's like everything's happening all the way. - Yes, I did write, like this was like a 99. - Yeah. - So unfortunately, I don't really have any backstage notes. The biggest story from all this would have been the fact that Tammy is now gone. - And that's very obvious in a very certain segment. - Oh, I guess the other thing is, apparently a couple months ago, it's like the spring break kind of segments and all that. There was apparently a bikini contest that got very much out of hand and it was like, originally it was unnamed W.W. wrestlers. And now it's like, well, it was buff bag well and he was pulling some tops and some bottom strings. - Yeah, that doesn't surprise me. We haven't seen buff in a minute. - Yeah, he suspended. - For that? - No, I mean, he punched the... - Oh yeah, I forgot about that honestly. - So I guess let's get straight into the show, 'cause we had a lot to go over this. - Yeah, this is a full episode, strap in. - It's May 29th, 2000 live from Salt Lake City, Utah. 7,700 in attendance, which not bad. - Not the worst. - Only 4,000 paid. - Yeah, that sounds alright. - And 12,000 were announced to be there, which is just a lie. - Mm, hm, hm, hm. - Ratings Y has showed it a three to, uh, Ros 6.4. - It's, we've had worse. We've had worse ratios. - And we start with the Thunder Recap, which is kind of crucial you need to see some of this, 'cause like, yeah, Kevin Nash is now the champion. - Yeah, thank God we watch that Thunder, 'cause, oof. - There's a lot that comes up from that Thunder, this one. - Yeah. - But at the actual Nitro, Olimo arrives. It's Ric Flair. He's back from his brain aneurysm. - Yeah, you know, he had an aneurysm. Quick jump back into reality. - He's here with his family, and he tells his family to stay in the limo. He's-- - They don't. - Well, he's 10 steps away, and then they get kidnapped. - 'Cause they get out of the limo. - Why is there so much kidnapping on all, every show? Somebody can kidnap on every fucking show we watch. - 'Cause somebody decided that kidnapping was edgy. I mean, I guess it is, but it's very, like, scooby-doo, I don't know. So I don't know whether I want him to be kidnapped, or he just starts a kidnapping character, but we need Kidman to be a kidnapper. - Kidnap man. Rare sighting of Ric Flair's wife, though. - Yes. - We never see her. - She would have appeared at the very end of that home invasion kind of thing. - Again, I mean, that makes sense. I just don't remember recognizing her being there. - We didn't get the opening pyro and see the asylum above the ring. - Oh, good. We're having another asylum match. Yay. - The commentary tonight is Tony Shavani, Mark Madden, and Scott Hudson. No more, Bobby. Hope you had your fill. - Scott Hudson is such a forgettable commentator. - Yeah. - Why is he here? What does he bring to the table? - New WCW champion, Kevin Nash, comes out to the ring, and then Scott Snyder comes out right after. - Immediately. - To the point where it seemed like Kid Nash is being interrupted, but like, no, they're together. That's fine. - I mean, not even though, because Nash didn't even say anything. He got to the ring and then Scott Snyder's music hit. So it didn't feel like an interruption. It just felt like, "Oh, I'm here too." - Remember how Scott Snyder's the US champion? - No. - Also, we're back down to two ladies. We had a brief moment of back to three, but now it's just Shakira Madezia with him. So Kevin Nash, thanks Scott Snyder for his help on Thunder. And then notes that reboot Nitro was only eight weeks ago. - How? How is that possible? That feels like so long ago at this point. - He runs down basically what's happened to all the millionaire's club. It's like, yeah, everyone's kind of fucked besides me. - Yeah, he's not wrong. - Nash does note in terms of the millionaire's club that Scott Snyder is an ally. I'm like, "It is almost June." - I don't know that he's an ally though. - Probably not. Nash named Rob Scott Hall and he's like, "Yeah, Scott wants to come back." - So at first he was starting to say like, "Oh, I have a friend down south who might be wanting to come back." And I was like, "Oh, he's being coy and whatever." And then he says, "Yeah, Scott Hall." Okay, we're just naming names. It's the reverse of the, I'm not gonna name names, but you never should've been broken in this business. Kevin Nash, you use that word. Yeah, I think I mentioned before, we are fully in Kevin Nash trying to get Scott Hall re-hired by any means in television time necessary. - I feel like this is just what Kevin Nash does for a career because he does this on TNA. - Yeah. - Like all Kevin Nash is doing is trying to get his friend a job and his friend keeps losing the job. - Yeah. - Man, he's a good friend. So that was me. I'd be like, "Dude, stop, you're fucking the situation up. Sorry." - Nash wants to show how hard it is to kill a legend and brings out Rick Flair. Rick Flair says that he Nash and Scott Siner are being on the same page. He's a big problem for Russo. And I'm like, "Yeah, doesn't Scott Siner actually hate you?" Rick brushes over the whole health thing. He's like, "People wanna know what happened. It's fine." Cool. - Basically they didn't actually write anything 'cause they didn't expect anybody to actually question it. - Rick says he's still wrestling at the Great American Bash and he's gonna find Russo tonight and more or less beat his ass. Nash then grabs the mic again. He's like, "Well, you got stripped of this belt. You're the rightful champion." So you are now the champion again. - Good guy, he's not wrong. - So Flair is now a 16 time world champion, which I guess to us means, oh, he's not winning it again at any point. - I guess that's true. I didn't think about that. - This is title change 17 on the year. - This one though I like. This makes sense because Kevin Nash is correct. Rick Flair did not lose this belt. Stole this belt was taken from him. - Yeah, it's crazy. - It's not wrong. - It's crazy how members of the click keep winning the world title and not having to do the job to drop it. It's weird how that keeps happening. - Okay, I'm not even looking at it like that. I'm looking at it from like an ethical standpoint. Like he is right. - I think at this point, Nash is a three time WWE champion. The first one he literally handed to Hulk Hogan. Second one, I think he just lost to Hulk Hogan. And then this one hands off again. - At least he lost one. - Jeff Jarrett comes out to the stage. He is incensed and is like, you're all women. Got him? - Yeah, what? - Yes, he does kind of insult them that they're all women, but he is more so saying, is this the view? Which is more of an insult, honestly. 'Cause the view is just a fucking annoying show. - It's probably doing better ratings. - Maybe, but have you ever watched an episode of The View? - No. - Oh my God, it's painful. It's painful to watch. It's five middle aged women just yapping. So I'm unclear if Jarrett books these matches or just announced that Russo has booked these matches, but we have Kevin Nash versus Rick Steiner and Tank Abbott. And if Scott Steiner interferes, he'll be on toilet duty next week. - With a toothbrush. - Yeah. - That was the crux of that. You have to clean toilets with a toothbrush. - Scott interrupts and says, talking out your problems is overrated. And then he just notes that it's like, my frees get out of line. I gotta slap him around a little bit. I'm like, oh, okay. - Yeah, he admitted to domestic abuse. - Cool. - He also tells Jeff Jarrett to come down, bend over and kiss his ass, which prompts line of the night. Screw you, slap ass Steiner. God, your verbiage is just so crisp, Jeff. - In case you forgot, Jeff Jarrett also has stroke. - Yes. - I don't think you need that. - I can't keep noting every time he says he has stroke or that he is the chosen one. - It's been a minute. - That would be half the podcast. - No, it's been a minute since he's given us the stroke. - True. His finisher is the stroke. - Yeah, but I'm thinking of the promo where he tells us that he has stroke. - I said the way he's been booked lately, he ain't in this fucking finisher. - He does not have stroke recently, it doesn't feel. - Jarrett then books him versus Rick Flair for the title tonight and Flair's like, no, I'm good. - So that was the other thing that was kind of confusing to me. Jeff Jarrett comes out and he's pissed that Nash just gave the belt over to Flair. Like he's mad about it. He's like, that's not how this works, whatever. But then he just flips and immediately accepts it. He's like, okay, so I'm gonna fight Flair. Like, why don't you say like, no, I'm gonna fight Nash and get the belt because he's the one that has the belt. Like, you're just backtracking on your own argument right away. - Well, I think he's just mad about it, but also, in your scenario, chicken shit, Jeff Jarrett wants to fight a seven foot man. - I mean, I'm just saying like, lean on your laurels a little more like, stand for what you believe in. If you don't think that Rick Flair should have the belt, then don't accept that Rick Flair has the belt. Don't think that you can win the belt off of him. - But Flair say he's off tonight, brings out Vince Russo in a new blood tank top. Really, he's a t-shirt with the sleeves cut off. Like, dude, what, okay. - 'Cause he's from New York, he's edgy. - Russo says that he's one step ahead and brings out David who has Beth Flair and Reed Flair and Reed isn't a headlock and yes, they've been kidnapped. - Yes. - 'Cause commentary, as you noted earlier, he doesn't know his family's been kidnapped. It's like, oh, yeah, I guess he doesn't. - Yeah, he went and I'm known. If I was Rick Flair, I would be so pissed. 'Cause like, I left you 10 minutes ago and you somehow have already gotten kidnapped. Just stay in the fucking car. What did I say? - Yeah, there is the elevator like, "Why'd you even bring him?" - Right? Yeah. I guess his intention was to bring them for them to be safe 'cause he's like, he can watch over them, but he left them immediately. - So Nash Steiner and Flair take out security and chase Russo and David Flair. So yeah, we have a new champion. We don't have a title match for the pay-per-view yet, but Rick Flair's back. - Yay. It never actually felt like he was gone. - Yeah, he was gone for like a week. - Yeah, this being a big return, not really a thing. That's why I think he kind of brushed off the aneurysm storyline 'cause he's like, I- - Well, I didn't, yeah. Backstage, we see Vampiro pulling up in a fuel truck. - Yeah, why? - 'Cause fire. - He's not driving a fire truck. - It's a spooky truck. - Oh my God. - Backstage, Rick Flair tries to find his family. We go from that to a 1-800-collect plug and I'm like, "What 800-collect your family, Rick? Jesus." Back from that commentary is like, Rick Flair has agreed to the match. When did he have time? - He's running around backstage. When did he have time? - Also, we actually get him verbally confirming the match later. So I guess that's just like- - Oh, with our girl Pamela. - Yeah, well, she's great. The filthy animals come out to the ring. Disco's rocking a Portland Trailblazers jersey 'cause local sports teams. - Go team, go sports. - Disco tries to cut a filthy animals promo but he's being corrected on the verbiage by everyone in the group. Disco offers a lumberjack match to anyone in the MIA, which very much kind of should have been GI, bro. I don't know why it wasn't. He's not here for the segment. Because then Conan grabs the mic and he has his arm wrapped up with the- - Yes, he's very clearly injured. - But he grabs the mic and he calls out GI, bro. And I'm like, "So clearly this is gonna be disco "versus Booker T." - No. - We get the misfits and action theme hitting. What the fuck was this? - This music sucks. - It definitely sounded like a dub which I think didn't help that they come out to the stage and they wait for pyro to go off. And I'm wondering if the pyro is more in time with the original theme? 'Cause they just stand there waiting for this little pirate to go off. - Yeah, it was really awkward. - Lieutenant Loco runs towards the ring. It's a jumping shoulder block on disco over the ropes. And we have our match. It's the tenant Loco versus the disco inverter. - I can't keep track of what these stupid names are. It's Chavo. - Tebow's suplex that no one sees 'cause they're all looking at major guns coming out to the ring now. - Oh man, this broke my heart. - Loco dives onto all the filthy animals. Conan, very smartly when he's hurt, stand to the back of the pile and just casually falls over at the end. No contact was made. - Yes. Sorry, the part that breaks my heart is a little bit later. I forgot that there was stuff in between honestly. - There's a match. I know what broke your heart. - This match is not great. - That was fine. - I didn't know. - Disco drops Loco on the ropes and hits a cobra clutch leg sweep. Loco is thrown out of the ring to the filthy animals as commentary notes that Scott Steiner versus Shane Douglas is booked for later. - Ew. Why? - I hate Shane Douglas. - I look at my notes. I'm like, what did I say? Oh, just Shane Douglas. - Just Shane Douglas. - I thought they said here that the handicap match is gonna be in the asylum, but no, the Scott Steiner matches in the asylum. - I don't remember. I mean, that makes sense. You can't have three guys in that asylum. It's not big enough. Especially also with the angle you have for that. - Mm-hmm, true. - Disco dances on the second rope and misses a diving elbow. Loco throws disco onto the ramp. So the MIA go after him up the ramp in the ring, Rey Mysterio attacks Lieutenant Loco and is gonna go for the Bronco Buster, but Liv Morgan, sorry, major guns distracts him. Yes, although very similar moves here because, oh, my feminine wiles, I'm so vulnerable. - Yeah, but unfortunately, Rey gets a little, a lot hornier than Dom has in current day. Honestly, Rey is as horny as Liv is during these days. - Yes, oh my God. - He's like undoing the belt about to pull his dick out. - He's making hand motions, like, you know, I don't even know how to describe it. Like hand motions to get her to go around. - A blowjob. - Yeah, I don't wanna say it, it's crass, ew. But he's such a horn dog and it's so, Rey, come on. - Angie, come get you, man. - Come get you, man. Whose man's is this? - So Rey is just like sitting on the second rope as major guns, rips her shirt. I mean, it's like, basically the same out of clothing underneath. - He might as well be a cartoon dog doing the Abu guys. - Yeah, she low blows him. - But not like that. - No, no, kicks him in the dick. And by kicks him in the dick, I mean kicks the turnbuckle pad under his crush. Turned a DDT from Loco on a disco and Chavo Lieutenant Loco wins. - Chavo, just call him Chavo. I'm not doing this to Lieutenant Loco shit. - On the ramp, Nitro Girl Tigris checks on Rey and then comes into the ring to attack major guns. Tony Schrodze think, what's happening here? Mark Baden's like, well, that's Rey Mysterio Jr's girlfriend. - Since fucking win. - Again, get Angie on the horn. - Angie, where are you girl? I feel like they just remembered that they have Nitro Girls. They're like, oh shit, these girls are still in the payroll. They should be doing something. - Or is it that they're willing to have X amount of women appear on TV and now that Tammy's gone, it's like, oh, we got a little bit of luck. - Oh, we have a slot, maybe. - I think in reality, this is just, well, they have major guns, so Field the Animals need a girl. - Which is so confusing because their girl used to be Tory. - Yeah. - Is Billy Kidman not in the Field the Animals anymore? - I think he just, yeah, he's more part of the new blood 'cause are the Field the Animals in the new blood? - I think. - Yeah, the, I hate to give praise to the invasion, but at least they all were, you know, t-shirts to let you know where they stood. - It was very clear. - So Tigris attacks major guns. This somehow requires 12 people to separate them. - These girls are just, they're so strong. They're, they're hatred towards each other. They're jealousy is just so strong. - Yeah, this is the first time they've interacted. - Never. - Yeah, as a match, this was, it was fine. I mean, you know, both of these guys can go. - What did the audience think was happening? - I don't know. - Like, if Tigris just comes down and you're just in the crowd, you're like, why the fuck is she here? - Cat fight. - Fuh! - I don't know what they're gonna do with the pay-per-view with these guys 'cause they kinda did the match on Thunder. And again, Ray is still hurt. - Right. Technically, I mean, he can still, he can do his stupid little blowjob things in the corner, I guess. - You go backstage, it's Pamela Paulshock standing right in front of Vampirro. Great blocking there. - Good job. - She asked, what's with the gasoline truck? Is this another one of your sicko plans? - Vampirro's like, who are you? - Well, he first says, don't worry, only the sinners will burn in hell. And they're like, who are you? Immediately cuts her off. - Immediately, it's like, you don't fucking matter. - Vampirro says there's gonna be a fire night and staying that'll be on your head. - Got him. - Chronic then suddenly appear beating down Horace Hogan into the interview set. Sean Stasiak and Chuck Palumbo save him. Both of them have fun new nicknames. - Oh, I didn't catch the nicknames. I was so focused on the madness that this episode was or this segment was. I just could not keep track of it. - Yes, he is perfect, Sean. - Oh, yes. - And the event, Chuck Palumbo. Oh, bud, but you're on the undercard in your own fucking nickname. - Oh, 'cause he was the main event. Oh, we got downgraded. Oh, buddy. - This is not the last we see these guys. We see a lot of everyone in this segment. - I don't like that. - Backstage, Miss Hancock is headed to the ring. We're actually bothering to advertise the pay-per-view. We get a lot of ads. - Yeah. - Like very specific, like for like, hey, this match is happening that Sunday. - Yeah, I was saying that this episode felt a lot like early night show for us. This is very different. Remember, we used to go into the pay-per-views and have no idea what was happening. Now, at least we're getting like some form of advertisement. - Miss Hancock comes out of the ring. She says that she knows everyone thinks she's a stick in the mud, but she can let her hair down and have a good time. - Who thinks she's a stick in the mud? - I think 'cause she dresses like a librarian. 'Cause she holds a clipboard. - She says to hit her music and let's her hair down, starts dancing. Chris Candino interrupts alone. - This is the segment where you can really feel the lack of Tammy. - Immediately, we cut to backstage in the kidnapping room. - Then the kidnapping room. - David Flayer's like, I gotta go. - Why? Why? Even Vince Russo says like, why? Why do you have to go? Why? - And then, well, Russo then also yells at Beth and Reed. - Is Beth Reed's mother? - I wanna say yes. - Okay, I'm trying to like understand the hierarchy, not the hierarchy, but the familial bonds. 'Cause I know she's not David's mother. - Yeah. Candino says Stacy doesn't care about wrestling and threatens her to not stick her nose in his business. And he like, next time it won't be so nice. And then like goes to beat the shit out of her. And I'm like. - This was very clearly supposed to be a Tammy spot. This Tammy was supposed to have all of these lines, obviously, and they just didn't bother to rewrite it for the story or something. I don't know. But this one is one that felt very weird. And then, you know, everything else happens. But it just, it very much felt like you guys needed to finish off the Tammy story somehow. And making Chris take her lines in the segment was the way to close it out. - David Flayer makes the save. - Why? - David and Candino awkwardly brawl. And so Rick Flayer comes out to beat up David. - Why? - Well, 'cause they have a match. - Okay, but why now? - I mean, I guess 'cause he's alone but not surrounded by like 40 security guards. - He's about to be. - Yeah, 'cause R&B security break this up as David helps Miss Hancock to the back. Rick just manages to like slip away from security and follows them. But commentary is like, oh, I don't think, I don't think Daphne's gonna be happy about this. You know, he's fiance. - He's fiance. - Yeah, but you keep asking why. - Yeah. - Emily, I can't believe watching all these nitros. It's not obvious to you that in real life, David Flayer and Stacey are dating. So obviously you read the dirt sheets and you know that. - Oh my God. - Yeah. - That's why. - That's why. - Fuck you. - I legitimately think they suddenly had Daphne and David be engaged to set up just this. So she has more of a reason than that. - They could be a cat fight. - Oh yeah, there's going to be a match between Daphne and Stacey. - Wow. God, Vince Russo is the most insufferable person on this fucking planet, isn't he? - Yeah, Vince Russo going, why are you going out there? It's like fuck you, dude. You of all people know exactly why this is happening. - That's so annoying. Oh, that makes me angry. I hate that. I hate that a lot. - Yeah, I got it. I can't believe you need to pay attention in these shows, Emily, God. - Oh my God. I knew that David and Stacey dated 'cause we've had the whole conversation of how, like how did she go from David Flayer to George Clooney? That doesn't make any sense. But I didn't think that it would come in-- - I know a massive downgrade. - I didn't think that it would come into play. This early, at least. - Outside of the arena, I guess probably earlier today, paparazzi to pick photos of Kimberly. They're like, oh, Mrs. Page, I'm not Mrs. Page anymore. I'm just Kimberly. - She doesn't have a last name. She's like Beyonce or Cher. - We didn't see a clip that happened on Friday of her throwing out DDP stuff at his house and there is some porn level acting here from Kimberly. - Yes, and her assistant. Yeah, 'cause they were jumping back and forth between last Friday and this week. It goes back and forth a couple of times later on too. But they're in the basement and she's going through all of his trophies and accolades and pictures and memorabilia. She's like, that's trash, that's junk. And the assistant goes to throw away something else and she's like, that's a picture of me. How dare you even consider throwing that away? I'm in that picture. - Honestly, I just turned into a game that I spy for me. I'm like, oh, what cool shift is DDP? 'Cause one of them was a big DDP master card poster. - Yes, they have the big credit card thing. - So I'm the phone with Eric Bischoff. She says that she's in the shrine of DDP and I'm like, Sarah? It's Paige, she's got some sort of shrine. - Oh, no. - They were building Lauren, they didn't even know it. - Vince Russo and Eric Bischoff may not watch their own product, but Vince McMahon watches it. - No, he doesn't. - One of Vince McMahon's groans watched it. - That's actually a major issue with the invasion. Is that Vince McMahon clearly did not watch Nitro? - Yeah. - To quote Jim Ross, "I was busy Mondays." But yeah, I can't believe he's throwing away all DDP stuff. - Yeah. - In the boxes, just marked crap. - Which I think is funny. - In the arena, we get GI Bro coming out to the ring for a promo. He's also now rocking face paint. - I like the face paint. - I like the face paint with the whole ensemble. I don't like it when he's just in the rest of the game. - When he takes everything off, actually has a match. - Yeah. - He says, "People have been asking me, why are you GI Bro?" - Valid, valid question. - I used to be GI Bro, now I am again. - Cool. - Come on. Bro calls out Sean Stasiak for the Great American Bash in a boot camp match. - What is a boot camp match? - We're gonna find out. - I'm intrigued. I have an idea of what it's going to be, but it's not gonna be that. - It's gonna be a Nigerian Trump match, Emily. - It's just gonna be a match. I always have hope with Booker T because he's part of my favorite gimmick stupid segment match that has ever been. - Getting not a match. - It's a match in my heart, but he has the capability to be creative and figure something out like that. So if they want to do a boot camp match, oh, we could go find a boot camp. We could do this. It'd be cool. - GI Bro then calls out a big goof, Mike Awesome. And then throws the footage like a month and a half ago of Mike Awesome hitting an awesome bomb on Booker on Thunder. It's like, you're trying to take me out. I'm like, I mean, that's just his move, but-- - That's his job too. You're wrestlers. - Yeah, I don't know why we felt that he had to add context to this match. - There was no context needed. - So Bro tells Awesome to bring his ambulance out, and yeah, Mike Awesome backs the ambulance into the arena. We don't have an ambulance match. - Why do we keep having ambulance matches? - 'Cause there's gonna be one on the pay-per-view. - Why? - 'Cause career killer, isn't it? - No. - So around the start of this match, Tony Schwan just like asked the group like, hey, you know, David Flair saved Miss Hancock. I'm still really focused on that. Let's go Hudson's like, I can't imagine Daphne would be happy. I think my wife would be really pissed at me if I saved another woman. I might, you know, she might just like leave all together if that happened. I'm like, you can't help people out, Scott. - Oh, what? - How are things at home, man? You talk? - Are you one of those people that can't like make eye contact with women? - Well, I think he is just for, but that's because of himself. - But like, maybe, maybe couple's therapy. - Yeah, you know, he would have his way to do it, which, you know, obviously that's implying something, but like, Scott's like, if I helped a woman, like Jesus do, so actually, if I saved a woman and I'm like, that implies a more dire circumstance with someone need saving. - Like if someone, if a woman is about to get hit by a car in traffic and you move her, how dare you? Your divorce now. - So Mike Awesome brings the halo and brace to the ring. Yeah, bro, attacks awesome on the ramp and they brawl to the ring. Awesome, vaults Booker into the ring who lands on his feet, but awesome hits a slingshot shoulder block. Awesome, Powerwom's bro and goes for a diving clothes line, but Booker kind of has the drop kick and they fuck up a drop down and leapfrog spot before Booker hits a jumping clothes line and a scissor kick, like, moment awkwardness, they got it back. They then head towards the ambulance and awesome hits bro with the halo. Awesome signals for an awesome bomb on the ramp, but DDP runs out, hits awesome with a steel chair, DDP and Booker double urinagi, awesome, off the stage through a table on the ground and oh, it's a rough landing for all Mike Awesome. - It is a rough landing, but there's also no way to make that comfy. - I'm not even, well, there's that element of it, but also when the table breaks, like the one half comes back down, like, on his face. - Yeah, hits him on his face. - The two then load him into the ambulance and GI bro wins. - I actually really like this one. - I would say. - This one was fun. - Well, shocking Booker T and Mike Awesome. I really like the smash. - I don't give a shit about Mike Awesome, but Booker T was very fun. - Yeah, I wish it had more time. - Yeah. - Maybe it wasn't an ambulance match. - Maybe, no, this one was fun. This was, like, much needed. I like Booker T, I just want to watch more Booker T. - Yeah. - Look, his push is coming. He just got to be a little more patient. Backstage, Sean Stasey act, Chuck Palumbo, and Miss Elizabeth, mock GI bro, 'cause they are now in charge of her kidnapping. Someone knocks on the door, and then they slide a note underneath, and Chuck Palumbo goes over, reads the note. 419, got him in it? No, this is stupid, don't you laugh at him, like. Also, the night of the door slid the note. The door was unlocked. I want you to think about the actual logistics of this, 'cause it required them to go find paper and a pen. Nowhere Chuck Palumbo and Sean Stasey act were, slide it out of the door, and hope he turned his back. And the door was unlocked. - I still, I think the line, it's 419, got him in it for chronic, I think that's hilarious. That's hilarious. - I forget if it's later or on thunder, where they come out and chronic 419 shirts. - That's gotta be soon. - I saw it, I was like-- - Oh, then-- - It's either later in this show or it's on thunder. - I think it's this show actually, 'cause I think I noticed that. - It's fucking stupid. - I love it, I think it's hilarious. - So yeah, chronic beats down. Like, you wanna say Palumbo and O'Hare, 'cause I know they become a tag team. Shut O'Hare's not even fucking here yet. - No, I don't even know who that is. - Liz takes off to where we don't know. - She's just gonna get kidnapped again, it doesn't really matter. - Team Bischoff heads to the ring, and Hulk Hogan arrives at the building. - Oh my God, he's back. - Yeah, Hulk Hogan says that he is back up now, and we see the Goldberg monster truck pull up. - Yeah, Goldberg. - And then a much smaller car pull up. - Yeah. - It's Goldberg. - In the tiny ass car. - He's just back, that's how you find out. - That's how he returns. - What the literal fuck? - You were way more pissed about this being his return. I'm more pissed that he didn't get out of the monster truck. - Well, the funny thing is, I thought they were gonna try to imply, oh no, he was totally like, they didn't wanna show him getting out, because they kinda hide the car in the first shot, but later on we see Goldberg get into this car. - It is comically small for how big Goldberg is. Oh my God. - I should also be noted, Hulk Hogan and Bill Goldberg do not interact on this show. So what the fuck was his backup about? - I don't know, 'cause yeah, he's not his backup. - Yeah, but yeah, Goldberg's back. That's... - I imagine this is going to be your worst bit. - Yeah, yeah. - It's just, I kinda, there's a small part of me that kinda gets it in terms of you want people. Like, oh shit, he's here. Now you can call your friend and say, change the channel, Goldberg's gonna be doing something. You know what else you could do? - Advertise him. - Yeah, hey, Goldberg's gonna be here next week. - Maybe actually do something with that stupid monster truck? - Yeah. Well. - Yeah, I mean, you don't even need to advertise. You just need to create some sort of intrigue that maybe Goldberg will show up, 'cause you're not doing anything enticing with what you have. - Yeah, him being here this week felt random. - Yeah, it was not necessary, it wasn't warranted, it was weird, I'm happy he's back. - Yeah, we'll see more of him later. Rick Flair is looking for his family. David still has Miss Hancock. We see that Goldberg and Scott Siner were on the cover of Sports Illustrated Kids. - Why? - There was a rumor at the time that it was gonna be Goldberg and The Rock and WWE Office like, no, if WWE is there, we don't want him on it. - Damn, the article was like, is professional wrestling real, or is it real sport or something? - Yeah. - It was innocent. - Yeah, I mean, Sports Illustrated Kids, it's not gonna be. - Heart-hitting journalism. - I was gonna make a joke about a wrestling scandal and I'm realizing I'm so spoiled for choice, I don't even know what joke to make. I'm like, oh man, there's a lot there. There's too much meat on that boat, I don't know how to attack it. - Oh, God. - We get Eric Bischoff, Billy Kidman, Tori, Horace Hogan, the cat and Kimberly coming out to the ring. - Again, the cat is the most random addition to this group. - He gets put in charge of thunder. Mark Madden says at the top of the hour, Goldberg is very likely to interfere in the Kevin Nash and a cat match. - Yeah. - Eric Bischoff does his usual disingenuous bit. The cat keeps repeating the last bit of Eric Bischoff's promo to where Bischoff's like, you need to stop. - Yeah, I couldn't tell if that was a worker shoot 'cause part of that was like Bischoff in like your fucking annoying stop. - I think it's a work because Eric Bischoff is just surrounded by people who annoy him. - True. Yeah, you picked your entourage. This is your own fault, brother. - Eric Bischoff says that Hogan doesn't have the guts to wear his red and yellow anymore. And if he did, you know I'd personally rip it off. - Sure you would. - Bischoff says he has a parting gift for Hogan. The special referee, the great American bash, is gonna be Horace Hogan. - Yay. - This is one of the least creative picks you could have done. - Yup. - Everyone said came back a couple weeks ago. - For the one episode, yeah. Is he coming back? - Way later in the year. - Oh, the way you said that I thought you were like, "Don't forget." - Yeah, you know he shows back up in W.S.W. - Oh, I know he comes back. I just don't know when. - Yeah, I think it's a wrong one. - Obviously before that moment, but I don't know when. That's gonna be the hardest episode for me to review. - It's cut from the network. - Good. - 'Cause it's gruesome as hell. - They can watch it. - Oh my God, no one should watch that. I can't watch it again. Even when it comes time to watch it in the match, I'm not going to watch it. I can't do it again. - I don't know, the spot next to Scott Norton's looking pretty ugly. - You want the picture of Sid decimating his leg next to Scott Norton? You sicko. - Hey, it's one man. You can't remember one thing you can't forget. So Hogan comes out to the stage, tells Bischoff that the red and yellow will never die despite the fact that you're not wearing it. - He's wearing black. - Yeah. - And Hogan swears at Bischoff and says, "Okay, Kibbin and Horace's ass." And Hogan says that after he wins, he's going to win the title at the pay-per-view in July. You don't know Bisch at the beach is next, do you, Hulk? - Yeah, he just keeps saying July. - He's done this before. I remember we kind of noted. - It's very me. It's like the next one, whatever that one is. I keep saying Bisch at the beach when I'm supposed to be saying great American Bisch. Like, I mix those up constantly. - Bischoff says, "Ah, it'll never happen." And Hulk Hogan heads towards the ring and we cut to backstage and we see Goldberg walking towards the ring area. And we go to commercial and back from commercial, Hulk Hogan has cleared the ring and everyone's gone. - Yeah, huh? - What the fuck? - What? - Also, he clearly didn't need any fucking backup. - Yeah, that's true. He was like, "Oh, bro, backup, why do you need backup?" This was the most infuriating thing when they're like, "Oh, during the commercial, here's what you missed." 'Cause that's not even for people that like were watching the other network. Like, "Oh, you missed this." Like, everyone missed this. This was just bad. - Yeah. - Blanket bad. What does this gain? What does this do for your viewership? - I think they just really wanted the top of the hour, like the go-birthing to line up. - So they had to just put it during the commercial, right? - Yeah. - Oh, I hate that. That's so stupid. Plan your fucking show better. - Well, it's the top of the hour and it's time for Kevin Nash versus Rick Steiner and Tank Abbott. Tank and Rick attack Nash mid-entrance and Rick Steiner hits Kevin Nash with a fucking pipe wrench. Oh, is that what that was? - Yeah. - Jesus. - Nash gets thrown into the ring, the bell rings. The asylum doesn't lower it. I'm like, "Oh, I guess this isn't the asylum match." - No, it's the other Steiner gets the asylum. - The heels beat down Nash until Goldberg's music hits. - Because of course it does. - But like, it almost like fades in 'cause there isn't like a big initial pop. - Yeah, that's true. - Like, the dish pops out there, but as soon as he walks out, holy shit. The crowd goes nuts. - Oh yeah, people freak the fuck out. I mean, valid. This guy's been gone for so long and there's the guy in the ring that's been calling him Ghostburg. Like, this is the moment. - Emily, that was too much emphasis. I need you to... - Ghostburg. - Goldberg spears Rick and Jack Hammersim as Tank Abbott casually walks to the back. - This is, okay, continue 'cause I have a lot to say about that. - Goldberg helps Nash to his feet and counters like, "Holy shit, he's helping the guy who broke his streak." And I'm like, yeah, that is kind of weird that they're on the same page. Goldberg grabs a mic and says he's been listening to Tank Abbott run his mouth. Tonight, the slaughter begins and the escape is no option. However, next week is our match. So next week in Atlanta, I'm like, oh, that's why you're not doing the pay-per-view. - This filled me with so much rage. - Yes, I'm aware. - I'm so mad because it wasn't even just the fact that Goldberg came out and he didn't do anything with Tank Abbott. It's the fact that Goldberg came out and Tank just walked backstage. He didn't even do a smirky little turn to camera. I was like, I'll get you, he didn't do anything. It was just like, oh, I hit my line. I'm gonna go backstage now. Exit stage left. Like, you didn't even look at each other. There was no eye contact. There was no stare down. There was, this was a moment where you could have acknowledged each other in a sense of there's going to be a fight and I'm gonna fucking kill you. And then Tank can leave and then Goldberg can go do his thing. There could have been a moment there that made this more poignant and they just were like, nah, I'm done. I think the way you can do this, the way you did it just a little bit better, is you need to have Tank leave the crowd, not just casually walk across the fucking hard camp. - It was just the casualness that Tank left. If he did it with any more attitude, any more gusto, any more anything, I would have been okay with it. - So next week, we have the in-ring return of Goldberg. And in terms of the segment. - I don't care. - Oh, I felt myself feeling hope. I'm like, I know this brand dies, but the crowd being so in a Goldberg, Goldberg bringing that energy and presence and I'm like. - I just wish it wasn't against Tank. - Apparently Goldberg's not fully healed up, so that's gonna be a quick fucking match. - I mean, sure. Okay, in that sense, then yeah, I am excited to see that energy come back. - Yeah. - And that amount of like the audience give a fuck, but it's Tank. - Yeah. - Fucking hate Tank. - But hey, after Tank, it'll be somebody. - Maybe Sid. - We already did that. We don't need to do the go after that. - It wasn't bad. We need something. Who else? Nash, Hogan, pass. I'm good. - I can tell you without spoiling much, Goldberg is going to main event to pay per view against Chronic. So backstage, Pamela tries to interview Goldberg. He doesn't want to talk. Gets into his very tiny sports car and leaves. - It's like a little clown car moment. Big man, tiny car. - Tony then plugs a nitro pre-show on WWE.com. And then we get Terry Funk coming out to the ring to face a mystery opponent. - Ooh. - So Funk cuts a little promo here, not much a note. He starts walking to the back to, I guess, go beat up Eric Bischoff and we get Vampiro. He's the mystery opponent. - How exciting. How thrilling. - Funk low blows Vampiro and pile drives him on the stage. So Vampiro low blows Funk now in the coffin. They then just, Vampiro then just like attacks the ref for literally no reason. - Yeah. - He didn't really understand Vampiro's motivations here. - 'Cause then he also starts yelling to like hit his pyro 'cause it looks like he's gonna like hold Terry Funk down on this spot. - Over the fire, yeah. - But he's not close at all. - No, not at all. That was his goal. - And then he doesn't try for it again. They brawled behind the stage and into gorilla. Vampiro attacks random people backstage, including Ed Ferrara, aka Oklahoma. So good, get your ass kicked. - Good. I didn't even realize he was still here. He did have a moment backstage that I feel like you had a little bit of catharsis with where he started like destroying all the pipe and drape. - Yeah, 'cause after this Funk hits Vampiro with a trash can and then like he describes like the whole set of it. They tries to use it as a weapon and I'm like, okay. - Fuck your pipe and drape. - Vampiro scoops slams Funk through a table as they just kind of walk and brawl and they manage to get over to the production truck and Vampiro falls through a random table set up nearby. - The fact that they got this close to the production truck like even commentary was like, they're gonna pull us off the air. They're like, oh no, what are they gonna do in the truck? I actually thought they were gonna go inside the truck for a minute. I believed it. - The goal of all this walk and brawling was to get back to the gas truck that Vampiro arrived in. Vampiro hits Funk with the hose and then sprays him with the quote unquote gasoline. - Yeah, we're supposed to assume that Vampiro is dousing Terry Funk with gasoline. - Or as Tony Joine notes, it might be jet fuel. - Yeah, why would there be a truck full of jet fuel? - Sting suddenly runs in from like the parking lot area, like not the arena side, the other side. - Yeah. - And makes the save, he shuts off the hose that has just been like going in the background. - Yeah, it's just flooding the parking pad now. I guess we're supposed to assume that Sting like just arrived. He just parked, he's like, hey, what the hell's all this? I guess. - Vampiro then grabs a blowtorch from the cab and security comes in to stop this ocean violation. (laughs) - It is an ocean violation. - I like how there's the real security and then R&B security. - Yes, I mean, R&B security is a joke because if this was an ocean violation, if we're going to pretend that this is an ocean violation, whatever, why was a gas truck allowed to be this close to the arena when it had no reason to be there? That didn't raise any red flags with anybody? - I think we're looking a little too deep into it. - I'm gonna. - I think it's a Brian David Gilbert video where he counts all the ocean violations in Smash Bros. stages. I feel like you have an entry. - Oh, oh, yes. I think I've seen something along those lines. So this match doesn't have a finish. - No. - It's whatever. But yeah, they. - Dairy funk matches haven't really been like clean recently anyway, or at least no one was lit on fire. - Yeah, I'm like wondering how they're gonna get around that 'cause usually inferno matches, they have a lot of, you know, smoke and mirrors, no pun intended to get around it. I think everyone's favorite is Kane's big paper mache arm. - Oh, yes. But yeah, I don't know how they're gonna get around that for these two 'cause neither one of them wears gear that's like really conducive to being lit on fire. - No, unless they both start coming out in like full long sleeves for the pay-per-view. - I'm just picturing like women in Saudi Arabia. - Literally, yeah, exactly, like coming out in the jumpsuits. - So it's somehow gonna be like way more sexual and BDSM. - Mm-hmm, yeah, I think that they need to realize that it's not about the cover up. It's just, it's about the intrigue. That's what makes things, that's what makes bodies sexy. - Fuck in Saudi Arabia, I could go on. - Elsewhere backstage, Rick Flair is still looking for his family, cut to his family. Shane Douglas just casually walks in and I'm like-- - Why? - What's the thing? Not only is Rick Flair not finding his family, he's not finding anyone. - Yeah, he is in an entirely different arena, I guess. - So Shane Douglas casually walks in. Russo somehow even more casually tells Douglas, like, oh yeah, you have a match with Scott Snyder, like now. - And as much as I don't like Shane Douglas, he rightfully was like, what the fuck do you mean I have a match right now? Why do I have a match right now? - And Russo's like, no, it's a reward, it's for the US title. - Oh, why did you say so? - In a couple minutes, we're going to have Scott Snyder versus Shane Douglas for the US title. - Correct. - We cut to an ad advertising a US title match with Scott Snyder and Tank Abbott for the pay-per-view. - Oh, I didn't catch that. - Why? - I did not catch that. - Air this one, later guys. - What the fuck? - You literally could not, maybe I Scott Snyder's coming out would have been a worse title than Aaron, but this is a close second. - Wow, I did not even put two and two together. No one's paying attention. No one cares enough. - We cut to another clip from GDP's house on Friday. In reality, I don't know why we couldn't have just seen all this at once. It's not like it was happening live. - No. - But GDP gets to his house, all of his stuff is in the front yard. He's like, oh, someone ribbon me, bro. - Yeah, there's like old trophies and stuff. And he picked up one specific trophy. And he looked around and I was like, this isn't a fucking rib. Then he starts getting mad. - So the locks have been changed. Kimberly answers the door and says that it's her house now. She has cops with her who just tell GDP, like the best thing you can do is leave. - They're not wrong. Like if you escalate this, it's going to get worse. Like call a lawyer, leave the premises, figure it out. - Yes, but there's also a restraining order, which I don't know when that was. - Yeah, that one just kind of came out of nowhere. - Yeah, so the two cops need to work on their yes and a little bit because they just had their one points. But the one cop made you laugh a little bit because as he's like closing door to GDP, he's like, my kid's a big fan, by the way. - That felt kind of real, I don't know. - Backstage, Mike Awesome chats with Kimberly asking for her help facing GDP. He's like, hey, it's your husband. You probably has some good tips. I don't know anything. God, what? Mr. Sweaty Man. - Mr. Sweaty Man. - Yeah, Kimberly just talks about herself. Palumbo comes up, it's like, I lost Liz, can you help me? She's like, I know, I don't want to. It's like, well, you can go out and get TV time calling her out. Okay. - I mean, Chuck Palumbo gets it. He knows what she wants. It didn't. - Chuck Palumbo needs Kimberly to go out and get TV time 'cause he can't get any. - Oh, somebody's got to. But again, didn't Mike Awesome just get knocked out and thrown into an ambulance like half an hour ago? - He got thrown in like in the losing the match kind of way. - He got thrown through a table. - Yeah. - He was like unconscious. - Yeah, he's awake now. - And his first thought is to talk to Kim about DDP. - Well, he's facing DDP at the pay-per-view. - Sure. - If this dude kept kicking your ass, you'd probably want to tip or two. - I know, but this is just like a little too casual for what happened 20 minutes ago. - Yeah, I think-- - He's not even woozy. He's not even like ice pack on the head, nothing. - I think I can identify your problem a little bit 'cause it's the same realm I have with a lot of stuff on this show where we are revisiting stories like four times when we just need to hit him like once. - I mean, sure. It's the timing of this is what really confuses me. - The brand new chronic versus Palumbo and Stasiak gets like four, it's probably four segments of the show. Daphne, nowhere to be found. - Yeah. - Where's Curba? - She's not engaged, well she's planning her wedding. But like, she just got engaged and we never saw the engagement or heard anything about the engagement from David. Like, can we elaborate on that story a little? - Now, Kimberly's gonna go call Liz out. I am still vague on why Liz shows up here because the next segment is Kimberly, the event Chuck Palumbo and Mike Awesome come to the ring. - Just the event. - Kimberly, like tries to call Liz out, but it's interrupted by slut chance. I'm like, oh, fun. - Can you imagine if Chuck Palumbo gets demoted again to the event coordinator? - The PA. Kimberly calls Liz Squirt and-- - What? - Liz takes the fucking bait to come out to the ring. I'm just really like, why did you call me out here? - Why did you answer? - Liz says everyone is sick of Kimberly and asks Kimberly, like, what do you want, Kimberly? Kimberly clearly did not have a plan here 'cause just like, things are just like, get her. - Liz, you're doing this to yourself, girl. - Why'd you answer? Why'd you answer the phone? If you didn't want to be called, why'd you pick up the phone? - Kimberly scolds Liz for attacking here on Thunder. We do get a clip from Thunder, but it cuts off before we see her getting kidnapped and I was like-- - The best moment. - Yeah, Emily would have enjoyed seeing that again. - I think about that. - DDP's music hits and Kimberly just bails. DDP beats down both men and diamond cutters awesome. Eric Bischoff then comes out to the ring with some cops. - So once again, the whole reason for this segment was unnecessary. It's just like the Chris Candido thing earlier where it doesn't fucking matter what happens in the ring. It matters what happens after. Elizabeth and Kimberly, this didn't matter. - So Eric Bischoff has DDP arrested for violating their restraining order on his wife. Palumbo then attacks the cops and DDP with the muscle flexor. We didn't get Lex Luger making the save to no fanfare and no pop. I don't think people know what's him partially, 'cause he's wearing the big face mask. Oh, and it's not disguise, he's wearing a protective face mask. - Yeah, he just comes out, kind of clears the ring and takes Liz. I'm like, oh, that's the segment. No, Mike Awesome is then stopping DDP. So from the crowd, Utah jazz power forward, Carl Malone comes in and hits a diamond cutter. I'm like, awesome. - Sure. - The reason for this is that Malone and DDP have history. They may have ended a pay-per-view with each other. It was them versus Hogan and Rodman. - Oh, okay. I guess that makes sense. - Oh, we did not note that Donnie Osmond is also in the crowd. - Oh yeah, he is, 'cause I did make the joke about the Mormon and the Utah jazz. - Yeah. - There's a book of Mormon connection there to be made. - Malone helps DDP to his feet and they celebrate and that's the segment. Yeah, Lex finally has rescued Miss Elizabeth. - Thank God. - Just in time for us to never see Liz again in the entire world of wrestling. - Are you serious? - Yeah. - We're done. - We're done. - It's over. - Are you fucking kidding me? - It's over. - Oh my God. - Luger will be back in a couple of months, but they are unhappy with the creative. They wanted-- - Yeah, I'm just kidding. - Russo wants to do Kimberly versus Liz at The Bash. - Obviously. - And it's like, no, I'm not a fucking wrestler. - That makes me happy in ways that I can't even explain. - Yeah, Emily, you are done with Elizabeth. - I am thrilled. I want to play like celebratory music over this. Ding dong, it's done. Like, I never have to listen to her again. I'm sure she was great with Randy Savage. I'm sure they were lovely. I'm sure it was a wonderful thing in the 80s. I'm so fucking happy to never have to fucking talk about Miss Elizabeth ever again. - So our next episode is going to be WrestleMania 7, the reuniting of Randy Savage and Elizabeth. - Fuck you. - Yeah, Luger's unhappy with his creative as well and they leave I think her contract expires like in middle of the summer. - Is he done too? - No, he'll be back, I think by like October-ish. - So we don't get, we don't get Lex for a while though. - No, yeah, he has gone for a couple months now. - Yeah, Elizabeth is always a strange one 'cause especially with her whole relationship with Luger of very tragic end of her life. But someone who wasn't watching wrestling at the time, I've just, I've never really gotten it. I think she is one of those you had to be there. - I think I agree 'cause I recognize that she was a very big deal. And like she held something for a lot of people in the wrestling world. - Yeah, like one of her biggest things that like everyone remembers is, you know, she was always like going to be like the wholesome girl character. - Yeah, the girl next door. - And she showed up in like a little like short skirt and like red underwear while managing the mega powers and it was like, "Oh, oh my." - No, and I get that. It's like the, it's the girl next door getting with the big strong guy, the love story, it's beautiful, it's magical, sure. That ended 10 years ago. - Yeah, the problem was that ended, they got divorced and then they're like, "We'll pair you two up again." - Yeah. - Liz ran out of contributions at WSW a while ago and they very much were trying to squeeze that for all it was worth and I'm like, "Guys, you hired her knowing exactly what you were getting and then you kinda got mad at what the reality was." - Right, she was never a wrestler. Even the height of her WWE FQ, whatever career, she was never a wrestler. She wasn't really a promo either. - No, she wasn't even a manager, she was just a person. She was just a character. Stop trying to make her something that she's clearly not and doesn't want to be. It's hard to talk about her because she does have such a tragic end of life and I don't want, I'm trying not to like think about that, I'm really just thinking about like what I have seen her in and what I have seen her in annoys me. - Yeah. And that said with what Luger's doing right now, I'm fine with him disappearing for a few months. - Yeah, he's not adding anything either. - Oh, and I was mildly incorrect. I think they do eventually do do that Chuck Palumbo versus Lex Luger match, but it's like in January. It's not, you know, a part of this story. - No, it's nothing worth like holding her breath for. - We go from that whole segment to a Sting and Vampiro Human Torch match package and then we get Pamela Paul Shock. - Pamela Pumpkin. - She stops Ric Flair to interview him and if all the people who aren't giving her the time of day, why the fuck does Ric Flair stop here? - He's like in the middle of a run too. Like he's booking it backstage and then he just stops. - She's gonna fucking tackle him. She's like, "No, you're gonna talk to me." - Why, he is looking for his child. - So Flair says that the Jeff Jarrett matches on and I'm like, it was already, I thought. - Yeah, we've already established this. We established this like an hour and a half ago. - So then we go to Scott Steiner versus Shane Douglas in a US title Asylum match. - I've made the Asylum joke too many times. I can't keep doing it. - So Steiner grabs the mic from Dave Penzer to cut a little pre-match promo. Steiner says he brings out his two favorite freaks but knows that there's more freaks nationwide. And Emily, do you have the line of what the women here have to do to join his freak show? - I do not, I do not write it down. - I'm gonna read this as cold as I can. - Oh no. - Separate your hips and put your ass out and the daddy will make you pass out. - Ugh, ugh. - He does have a nice rhythm to it though. - He does. I would never say it's charming or that it works but I mean he knows who he is. - Yeah, he did go from I discovered foreplay back to I hit women and bent over for me. - Remember when he discovered aftercare, he was just lovely. - Steiner says he's gonna kick tanks ass at the Great American Bash and kick Douglas's ass tonight. Shane Douglas comes out to the ring, Steiner beats him down as the cage is still lowering including a press slam. Douglas low blows Steiner and hits a front falling suplex. Douglas hits a reverse neck snap and a swinging neck breaker as they very much are running into the walls of the cage here. This cage is just too small. It is so tight. - Douglas knocks Steiner down with multiple brass knuckle shots and this is where Tony Schwann is like, "Oh, the lax rules here in W's." You're in a fucking cage. - What, why are we talking about the lax rules? - We have to hit it like every fucking episode. - Oh my God. - He literally might've been the first dimension of it. - Maybe, yeah. - Steiner slams the franchise around the cage and hits a belly to belly, locks in the Steiner recliner and wins. I mean, the one good thing about these asylum matches is they have to stay short because there's not a lot of moves that they can do in there. It's just brawl matches. They can't do anything else. - Granted, I don't think the tank match of the paper is gonna go long, but you're telling me they wouldn't give this way too much fucking time? - With the right people they would. I feel like if they put Kevin Nash in there, it'll go 20 minutes. - Backstage, staying ahead towards the ring to face Billy Kidman and Hogan has seen kind of watching the monitor while wearing some of his red and yellow gear. It's like, okay, so he will wear it again. - Yeah, why did he show up wearing black if he did have the red and yellow with him? - I don't know, man. But he had a great American bash on and like, I'm once again noted like, oh yeah, there's no title match right now. 'Cause you keep changing who the champion is. So I'm like-- - That's true. - Like, flares the champion right now. Is it gonna be Flair versus David for the title as well? Considering what technically a Ric Flair loses, he has to retire, so. - He's not gonna. And that's not even a spoiler. Like he's not, even if he loses, he's not gonna retire. He'll disappear for a week. And then he'll come back like he did today or he's like, oh, I have an aneurysm. No, he didn't. - Flair next match. It's a match that on paper six months ago, we would have been like, oh my like-- - Best bet. - Yeah. - MVPs. - Automatic. Billy Kidman versus Sting. - Like, that sounds beautiful. It is not. - Sting throws Kidman around, but Kidman hits Kidman faction early and does the Hogan taunt. They each count her hip tosses until Sting hip tosses Kidman onto the ramp. And I'm like, that is just like the default, like rentable stage. That is rough. That is not a nice landing. - They're just throwing each other around in the show too. Like, it's rough to be a wrestler in WCW. - Sting throws Kidman back in the ring and then runs down the ramp for a big jumping clothesline. Kidman hits a DDT, but misses a diving splash. Sting hits a stinger splash and locks in the scorpion death lock. Vampiro runs out, hits thing with a blowtorch as Tory distracts the ref. Why would you need to distract the ref with all these lax rules in WCW? We don't want to see DQs. Kidman gets the pin. - But don't you want to see Tory like wiggle her butt a little bit? - Before we get into the post match of this, these guys did some fine action. Like, yeah. - They did fine, yeah. They needed a little bit more time. - Yeah. - They needed to be a legitimate match. - For like two, two and a half minutes. - Two more minutes, yeah. - What they got I think was like-- - Oh god, really? Was it that short? It was pretty, I don't know, it was pretty damn short. - I mean, the post matches what took it all over. - Yeah. Kidman Vampiro beat down Sting until Hulk Hogan runs out in the red and yellow. - There's he is. - His theme plays for a lot of this save. - Yeah, it was very, who's that wrestler in ECW? - New Jack. - New Jack, it was very new Jack or just like the whole segment is his music. - Eric Bischoff comes out with a chair, hits Hogan, Hogan immediately no cells. He grabs the chair and the rest of team Bischoff comes out and Ernest the cat miller gets in the ring and like sneaks past Hogan while Hogan is directly looking at him. Like sneaks the side and then kicks a chair into Hogan. - Eyes don't work, it's fine. - Horace joins the beat down on Hogan as the crowd chants for Goldberg, but like he did leave earlier. - Yeah. - But again, you were saying I have backup brother. No, you don't. - No, you don't. What backup? Who'd you bring? - The heels rip off a shirt and bandana, burn it in a trash can. And the way commentary treats is like, this is his only bandana shirt. - Yeah. Like, oh, it's a symbol of hulkomania. - Like the bandana is one thing, but the shirt he literally rips on a weekly basis. - Yeah, like he has a hundred of these. He has a hundred of these in his suitcase right now. - Vampir then drag sting towards the fire and it's like, I'm gonna murder you. But chronic's music hits. - Thank God. - This is, oh yeah, this is where they have the chronic 419 shirts. - Oh, okay, yeah, yeah. - They make the save and that's kind of it. - Yeah. - So Flair versus Jeff Jarrett is next and we just see Ric Flair heading towards the ring. I'm like, did you just give up on finding your family? - Yeah, I guess so. - We get a Flair, Flair video package and it's time for our main event. It's the same main event we had two weeks ago. It's Jeff Jarrett versus Ric Flair for the Disney title. - I think I've seen this film before. - David Flair comes out with Jeff Jarrett wearing a referee shirt. So I guess he's the ref for this. - Yeah, was that announced? - No, that's just a little surprise. Ric Flair is wrestling in his actual gear. I'm like, oh shit. - Yeah, and he looked good. He looked fine, I thought. - Yeah, he looks like a guy his age, but not like, oh, put a shirt on. Ric starts chopping Jarrett but keeps wanting to go after his son. Russo brings out the Flair family. Ric immediately runs up and attacks Russo. I don't think he was ready for that. - Yeah, I'm not sure. - Jeff Jarrett breaks this up, brings Ric back to ringside. Jarrett used to chair on Ric on the floor and then it's a big headshot and Ric is face down for quite a while. Pull him up, he's bleeding. - What was he doing face down? - Back in the ring, Jarrett hits punches to the cut. Flair manages to start a comeback as David goes to grab the Statue of Liberty toy. Fun fact, apparently when he hit Terry Taylor with that, he gave Terry Taylor a concussion. - Cool. - It was him or Daphne, but yeah. - I think it was Daphne. I think Daphne did that hit. - Yes, 'cause Terry Taylor was supposed to appear on his special Brian Pelman tribute show. And he's like, "Yeah, I kinda can't travel right now." - Oh no. - We'll talk about that a little bit more on the next show. There's a lot of people who were there and a lot of people who weren't there. - Oh, okay. - But apparently William Regal and Chris Benoit had an amazing match there. - Oh. - There might be videos somewhere. There wasn't one point. - Yeah, I can't hear about this tribute show at all. So, you know, we haven't done "Time to Blade" in a very long time. I feel like we need to start bringing that back. - We'll do it for the pay-per-view. - Yeah. - Yeah, he's... - Rick and Hogan are both definitely bleeding. - Oh, a hundred percent Hogan's gonna bleed. - Rick takes the Statue Liberty toy away from David and hits David with it. We had a flare turnbuckle spot and he lands in front of Russo. Russo hits Flare with a baseball bat and then back in the ring, Jeff Jarrett locks in the figure four. Charles Robinson comes to the ring to be the new ref, but Flare kicks out of passing out from the figure four. Rick punches Russo and gets to the ropes. He had an inside cradle from Rick, almost gets in the win on a fairly quick count. Jeff Jarrett yells at Charles Robinson, like, "Yeah, it's kind of fair." Jarrett hits punches the corner before two low blows to Jeff Jarrett. We get another Flare turnbuckle spot. He ducks a clothesline, hits one of his own and actually hits a diving axe handle. Rick knocks Russo off the apron again. Like, how many times are you gonna take out Russo as part of this match? - Oh my God, too many. - He goes for the figure four on Jarrett. Jarrett pushes Flare into the ref. Russo strips Charles Robinson into the shirt, puts it on as Rick fights off security. It hits a knee drop on Jarrett. Flare drops Russo fucking again. Goes for the figure four on Russo. David slides Jeff Jarrett a guitar. Jeff Jarrett guitars Flare at Russo counts the one, two, three. - Oh my God. - So your new WSU champion, for the fourth time in, like, six weeks, Jeff Jarrett, title change number 18 on the year. - Woo! - It is still May. - I thought this match was kind of fun. - Yeah, the fans throw trash in the ring and the heels celebrate. They leave with the Flare family. Little Nate's just shirtlessly holding Rick as David Taunts Rick with his family. You know, the match, the finish was a little overbooked, but that's, you know, that's kind of par for the course. - Yeah, that's to be expected, honestly. - But like, wow, you give two guys who can wrestle some time. - That's the thing, yeah. Like, you almost forgot that Jeff Jarrett can wrestle because he's been booked so poorly and we're just like making fun of him all the time. But this was actually like, oh shit. This guy is talented. I forgot. - I thought it was a great debut for Jeff Jarrett. - Yeah, who the hell is this guy? Were they even hiding this guy? - Yeah, where has he been? - Oh my God. I hope we get to see more of him. - How would you, why would you say that? Why would you go and say a thing like that, Emily? But yeah, that's, that's this nitro. It's a weird show. - It's chaos. - But it's not a bad watch. - Honestly, no, I did have fun. I did have fun watching it. It was just very hard to take notes on. It's, this is one of those episodes that you have to just like, turn your brain off and watch. Like, I know you hate that phrase when it's like, turn your brain off TV. But this one, I think benefits from turn your brain off. - Yeah, I think a lot of my issues were with the logics of more or less the company and not necessarily the show itself. - Right, sure. - Like the playing an ad for a match after a different match showing Goldberg before he bigs his big return. Yeah, it was more so I'm, this, this show a fresher to be with the company more than the show. - Yeah, but it wasn't bad. Honestly, in like, in comparison to what we've been watching for this company, this was, this was fine. - Yeah, it's like, look, was there some stupid bullshit? - Yes. - Yes. - There will always be stupid bullshit. - Did Kevin Nash get out of doing the job? Yes. Did they spoil the Goldberg return? Yes, but there's enough good moments to make you forget about all that. Like, and it gives you the vibe of an, of an, like a April of 99 nitro. - Yeah, it definitely did feel like that. I do still struggle to find an MVP. I have a best bet, I have a worst bet. I continuously struggle with an MVP. - I, I think all of mine have to come from this, the same thing. - Oh, okay. - But yeah, let's, let's get into it. It is best bit, worst bit, an MVP. Emily, what is your best bet? - I was torn between the main event and the GI Bro Mike Awesome match. I think I'm gonna go GI Bro. - Yeah, I'm gonna give that an honorable mention. I kinda, I had that written down, honestly, for a while. - Yeah. - If there's one thing you're gonna watch from this show, it's, it's Goldberg's return. That is the best bit of this show is him coming, coming down and cleaning house. - I disagree. - I think just the energy it brings, even commentary is talking about how like, yeah, wow, everything feels a little more optimistic and maybe we're not fucked now. - Unfortunately, I sincerely disagree. - Yeah. - Because that is my worst bit. - Oh no. - That is my worst bit. - Ironically, my worst bit is the actual return of Goldberg. - The car, yeah. - It's, it's showing up randomly in a car as you're about to fade to commercial, where most people, really, we imagine that. Most people who are like, ah, I'm gonna go to the bathroom, like, you know, I didn't even fucking miss it. - My worst bit is really tank. - Tank. - Your best bit is Goldberg. My worst bit is tank. It's just unfortunate that they are interacting with each other or not interacting, I suppose. And that's the problem. - And then Emily, who was your MVP? - I don't know. My gut instinct was Rick Flair 'cause he's got so much to do tonight, but he was also being stupid all night. He couldn't find his family. And he stopped to talk to Pamela, like dude. - He was booked to be stupid. He executed it well. - I guess, let me think on it, you go. Who's your MVP? - I think it's Goldberg. - He doesn't do anything. - Dude, you don't understand the hope I felt in that moment. - Well, you're putting a lot of weight on that hope. You're just, you're setting yourself up for heartbreak, Nick. - Oh, I very much know I am. I know I am a lot more than you do. - You know what? I'm gonna give it to Rick Flair. He had a lot to do tonight and he did it all. - Yeah. Hey, you know what? He found some confidence. - He did and he took a shirt off. I'm so proud of him. - So next up, we're gonna have one more nitro before the great American bash. - Oh my God. - We're almost there, Emily. But until we get to there, you can listen to all of our back catalog on pretty much everywhere podcast and found, but notably we're on How About Cast Spotify and YouTube. - YouTube is new, so go check that out. - You can follow us on social media @buttsinapod except for on Facebook where we are the Butts in the Seeds podcast and over on our Patreon right around this time, we're reviewing Bash the Beach 94. It's the 30 year anniversary of Hogan debuting at WSW. And I'm sure that won't bring anything terrible to this company. - I'm sure it'll be fine. - But we also finished Hogan Knows Best. There's a lot of Hulk Hogan over there and-- - Yeah, it's kind of weird. It's becoming a Hogan Patreon for two people who keep saying that we hate Hulk Hogan. We sure talk about Hulk Hogan a lot. - But there's also Legends House, couple WrestleMania. There's a lot of stuff he's not on to, so you're full of Hulk Hogan. He's not on some of it. However, we are doing the TNA new Monday Night Wars and he is all over that shit. - Essentially, if you like hearing a shit on Hulk Hogan, Patreon's place to be. - I think we have almost as many bonus episodes on there as WSW has title changes in this year. It's close. - Jesus. - But that's patreon.com/Butts in the Seeds. Emily, any closing thoughts on this very varied nitro? - It was very varied. I'm ready for it to just be a pay per be already. This has been the longest build. I know it hasn't been the longest build. - It actually might be. - I'm wondering for us, is it the longest one? I'll have to peek at that and report back. 'Cause yeah, we may have the most amount of our episodes. - Yeah, maybe. - Maybe the furthest we've been between pay per be is in a while. - Feels long. - But until the go home show for Great American Bash, I'm Nick. - I'm Emily. - And thanks for listening to The Butts in the Seeds podcast. - Bye. 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