Archive.fm

Yours Truly Johnny Dollar Radio

Johnny Dollar - The Stolen Portrait

https://www.solgoodmedia.com - Listen to hundreds of audiobooks, thousands of short stories, and ambient sounds all ad free! Relive the excitement of Yours Truly Johnny Dollar Radio, where each episode revisits the classic tales of Johnny Dollar, the iconic freelance insurance investigator. Discover how Johnny unravels mysteries and battles crimes primarily through sharp wit and keen perception. This series is a treasure trove for enthusiasts of vintage radio dramas and detective mysteries.

Duration:
30m
Broadcast on:
18 Jul 2024
Audio Format:
mp3

Hi, I'm David Quince. One way to help manage type 2 diabetes is to regularly exercise. My exercise program can help get you into a routine that works for you. Keep in mind, managing butt sugar also takes the right. Diet. Hi, I'm celebrity chef Franklin Becker. Ever since I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes, I've adapted my cooking style without sacrificing flavor. If you want to learn more tips about diet and exercise, visit mytype2transformation.com. Lucky Land Casino asking people what's the weirdest place you've gotten lucky? Lucky? In line with the deli? I guess? I'm in my dentist's office. More than once, actually. Do I have to say? Yes, you do. In the car before my kids' PTA meeting? Really? Yes. Excuse me, what's the weirdest place you've gotten lucky? I never win and tell. Well, there you have it. You can get lucky anywhere playing at luckylandslots.com. Play for free right now. Are you feeling lucky? No purchase necessary. Boy, where can we buy law? 18 plus, terms and conditions apply. See what's right for details. Time now for yours truly, Johnny Dollar. The next half hour has its baggage packed to take a trip with America's fabulous breeder's insurance investigator, Johnny Dollar. At insurance investigation, he's just an expert. At making out his expense account, he's an absolute genius. Expense accounts submitted by special investigator, Johnny Dollar, two Frederick Kimball General Manager of Fine Arts Futures, incorporated in the art yard. The following is an accounting of my expenditures and the investigation of the stolen portrait under the Duke of Masson, or who opened the season on canvas back to? Expense account item one, $350, plain fare, New York to London. Item two, $125, replacement brand new light tan topcoat borrowed and not returned by fellow passenger during flight. We've cleared Gander Newfoundt living with four hours out, flying at 20,000 feet over the Atlantic. In the weather, fighting it out to see which could darken sky first. Most of the passengers were asleep, but the rough weather was giving the man on the seat beside me a rough time. Although the plane at level off his dinner was still trying to gain altitude. Among other things, he complained of pills, so I split down my topcoat and threw it around his shoulders. Oh, thank you, I'm sorry to be such a bother. Oh, I think I'll try a drink of water. No, don't bother, he's up, forward, maybe he walks back too far, he steps out for a breath of fresh air. I didn't think anybody was sick enough to do that. By the time I got to the back of the ship, there is these passes from yelling around the aisle, and I'll unplay me not to know anything about what had happened, but if my ex-brand hadn't jumped out of the plane, he'd been pushed. And that posed this tantalizing question. If he's been pushed, and since he's been wearing my light tan topcoat, was I the one who was supposed to be taking that 20,000 foot swan dive into the Atlantic? I looked over the passengers, and to me, they all looked guilty, but I knew they couldn't be. I also knew I had no chance of finding out which one was. Some things settled down, everybody started asking me to stewardess, to sedate, to help them get back to sleep. I asked her for some blank sympathy to keep awake. By four o'clock the next afternoon, I was in good health. In London, and in the office of your policy-holder, Dexter Morley. Yes, I've been expecting you a dollar, you know, a company capable if you were coming. They're very generous of them to send you all the way over here to help. That way I have to pay my expense account to make an honest living. Don't ever accuse my clients of generosity. Oh? Oh no, they aren't being soft-hearted benefactors, they're being hard-headed businessmen. If that painting stays lost, it'll cost them $250,000. Well, I've had a brief view from the beginning. Oh, it's like you're wondering your story, Morley, don't mind. I'm just sleeping. I see. Well, I'll make a brief dollar. Well, during my lifetime, I've developed an overwhelming appreciation for fine painting. Unfortunately, I have not been able to develop the fortune that should go. As a result, I haven't only not been able to buy any great paintings. I've not been able to afford to travel to the museums around the world where the great masterpieces hang. There must be a lot of people starting the same fix. Exactly. And that's what gave birth to my friends. I have organized what you might call the masterpieces of a month club. Most members are twelve of the top museums and galleries in the world. This plan calls for them to rotate their most famous paintings. In other words, if the people can't afford to come to the pictures, my schemes use the pictures to the people. I knew it. Every month. Well, it's very interesting, Mr. Morley. But let's talk about the one that got away. Oh, yes, of course. I was nearly out landing the background of this case to delineate my responsibility in the matter. Well, so now we know that you feel personally responsible for the loss of the painting. Even though it's well-insured. Mr. Daller, no amount of money can get that picture he painted by the man who had originally painted it. The artist born nays and dead for more than three hundred years. Oh, a real gone guy. You know, if we fail to recover Bernays' masterpiece, the Duke of Masson, it would not only be a tremendous shot, but out to a tremendous loss to the root of us. Further, Mr. Drew and my reputation, the very first thing to be loaned arrives here in London from Paris four days ago. And the first night after I delivered to the museum, it has stolen off their wall. Okay, Mr. Moly? So much for the story. Where's the museum? It's the New Art Gallery at Coronary. Here's the address. I won't be able to accompany myself as I'm flying across the channel immediately to try to calm the official parish, the ones who loaned the stolen painting, they've been calling incessantly. Now, it's one of my assistants that's partying to meet you with the main entrance from the museum. Let's say, forty-five minutes? Okay. Later I'll be the man asleep on the step. Spencer Count, item three, sixton's paper, London Papers, to read while waiting for Miss Harding at museum entrance. No matter what I told Mr. Moly, I was afraid to go to sleep. Page one of each newspaper referred to my reason, the Miss Adventure, which had occurred on a plane the night before, a possible attempt on my life. Then along came another good reason for my lived grouping. This partying was on my opener. Speaking in artistic terms, no painter could completely capture her dimension. A sculptor could come closer, as far as I was concerned. So could she? And she did. What is this, a dog? It wouldn't leave. My Miss Hart, Mr. Moly indicated that I might find you asleep. I say that must have been a shocking experience on the way over. Oh, not only shocking but frustrating. Oh, yes, there was nothing much that could be done. We searched along enough to drop a few life rafts, some flares and a big blob of yellow oil to help mark the spot. Then all the pilot could do was call for the air to rescue boys in hopes. Yes, seeing in all the places, the whole day of court, shall we? Yeah, it could be that there, but for the grace of a light tan topcoat, go on. What was that? Oh, nothing. Well, shall we go museum-prawling? Yes, of course, though. Oh, there isn't much to see. There's just a flat place on the world. Oh, let's take a look at it. Hey, did you see a blank space on the wall? Oh, I did. You mean they stole the painting frame and all? Indeed, they did. Oh, aren't these the doing things the hard way these days? Usually, they just cut the painting out of the frame, stick it to the coat and make it get away. Yes, Mr. Moly, no. But perhaps this job was done by the pino. Or perhaps the burglar was interrupted, you had to make a run for it, frame and all. There are infinite profitability. Yeah, infinite. Thanks. Mr. Dollar, thank you. I've been disconnected here at the museum at his utter waste of time. I've gone over the home situation with a gentleman from Scotland Yard. I've written so much as a single finger, please. Miss Harding, I have yet to solve a case with a fingerprint. Sorry, I forgot. I mean, just can't stand at the end of the show of a 50-year woman. Oh, I wouldn't say that. It's according to what they are applying to a 50. I'm assuming you're busy. Mr. Dollar, I'm sure that I can send you a break in the trouble. I've awaited on an extraordinary amount of research on this case. I'll be careful what you tell me, Miss Harding. At this point, I can fuse easily. Mr. Dollar, a child can understand what I have to tell you. Sometimes a wide awake child is better than a sleepy man. Let's go ahead. Well, I'm busy to say, right here. Oh. There. You see, a blank wall. Now, Mr. Dollar, of the 12 former arties in London, I have discovered that nine are currently in prison. One is in hospital after four and four stories off of you. And the other two are at large, and maybe some providing it the addresses I have here. Hey, you sound more like a patron of the criminal courts than you do of the arts. The entire subject of criminal justice makes me. Now, have you seen enough of your blank wall? Yeah. Things are blank enough. Give me those addresses. And, why are you right? I think you better give me yours. Mr. Dollar, you don't eat. I don't eat. I don't eat. Oh, no. Delicious. [MUSIC] Spencer Coward, I'm four. Five shillings. Cab Faire to Scotland Yard. Tip to driver. Two bars. When it comes to money, I speak to all languages. Scotland Yard from the outside looked like big public school. Well, it has taught a lot of lessons to a lot of people. Inside, it was tea time. Well, I'm quiet for the officer in charge of the robbery, which I was concerned. I was led to an internship. I was in charge of the property and I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property and I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. I was in charge of the property. This complaint must be lodged by the legal owners of any stolen property. At that point and at that point only, are we allowed to act? You mean nobody called for help? Well, naturally, when the museum discovered the painting gone, they immediately rang us up. We went to court to gather primary evidence. Unfortunately, there was none. Well, what about the owners of the painting? The museum and Paris? As yet, we've heard nothing. We expect to momentarily. Inspector, just out of curiosity, what about this girl? Miss Harding? I'd say she's a jolly. I'm sorry. I mean, do you know anything about her? I'd say, did you do yanks carry off enough of our girls after the war? I'm not in the import business. I mean, as she known to you professionally. What? You suspect her? Well, not particularly, but she did give me this list. In her opinion, this is the who's who and where they are of your city's light-fingered art lovers. Let me see it. Well, quite complete and quite accurate, hardly the work of an amateur. When the world would a young lady like Miss Harding come into such information? That, Inspector Carrou, is exactly what I'm driving at. Back in Attack, he headed from Scotland Yard on my way to check into the Mount Royal Hotel. I gave my eyes a rest at the risk of missing the sightseeing, but my mind refused to follow suit. It now had three blank walls to stare into. The one in the museum, the one at Scotland Yard, and the most provocative of a tree to look at, the girl who knew too much. Miss Burial Harding? My mind also kept ruffling my nerve ends with a question. Was I supposed to be the guy who got dumped out of that plane the night before? We arrived at the Mount Royal Hotel, and I got my answers. Here we are, sis. That's the Mount Royal right. Stayed on it to where you can't miss it. What's the bill? To you? Just that'll be off the ground. How much? Do you want to check that? Oh, you'll figure it out. Phew! God, everything, Captain! Look out, don't the mind have caught it! That was a close one. You all right, doesn't it? Yeah. Lonnie, since the cars are back on the street, it's more dangerous to walk around now than it was when them ruddy buzzbonds were dropping. Yeah, a couple of good things about the buzzbonds, though. Nobody aims them at you personally, and nobody was at the wheel of serum. That made it official. I had been set up for a pigeon, and it was me, somebody had tried to turn into a seagull during that flight across the Atlantic. Expense account item five, three pound ten, available for services rented. How about that fourteen bucks for a bottle of scotch? I knocked off forty winks that felt like only twenty, and I grabbed a shower, shave, and a cab down Oxford Street and over to Soho. Expense account item six, five shilling, the legal limit on the price of dinner on English these days. I ate a nice place called tetanus, dinner being a bit of chicken, three choices of vegetables. Brussels sprouts boiled, Brussels sprouts creamed, and Brussels sprouts roasted. For dessert, I looked at the names and addresses of Miss Harding's two candidates for the boys most likely to have succeeded in swiping the missing portrait of the Duke of Masha. I was in the right district for one of them. I found myself in a dark and lonely muse. That may sound good to you, but in Soho, a muse is still only a place fit for ash cans and cats. I broke my way up the stairs of the address, the number one boy on Miss Harding's list. And a top step, I was breathing hard, and I wasn't all from a climb. I touched my teeth, and my knuckles and knocked on the door. Then I broke roll two, the basic instructions for the working snoop. I opened the door. All right, that lock never went to Yale. The door of a wood-burning stove across the room was open. The flames were radically painting the walls with orange lights, then erasing them back into black dark. I finally dared to breathe. Then I saw what I was looking for, lying on a table, its edges curled upward. An oil painting of a guy with short breeches and a long face. I started falling, but something bored my foot. I stared down at the floor in front of me. First it was pitch black, then the light from the stove flared up, and I saw that the object was what it... I thought it was, and I hoped it wasn't, a man wearing his head. And I don't mean his hair, it's farted in the middle. I rushed across the room, flipped them off the top of the stove, giving them a light, and looked for a telephone. There was none in the room of the corpse, so I tried to door the next room. And the door I was trying started erupting. In just a moment we'll turn to the second act of yours truly Johnny Dollar. But first we want to remind you that those delightful charming neighbors, Aussie and Harriet, are coming back home next Sunday night, coming back to CBN. You'll be able to join them on most of these same stations at 6.30 Eastern Standard Time, just before the Jack Benny show. Aussie and Harriet now have their own sons, Ricky and David, playing themselves in place of the young actors who formerly portrayed them. So make it a party for your whole family, when Aussie and Harriet, Ricky and David, come home with their farm and laughter to CBS next Sunday night. And now, back to yours truly, Johnny Dollar. When those bullets came crashing through the door at me, I dropped to the floor. Still on all whether my knees buckled or I meant to go down, and stayed where I was. But whoever it was on the other side of that door decided to take off, out the window. And to my feet, but by the time I kicked the door, I got to the window, I had that old mother Hubbard feeling, that Hubbard was there. And that's what I'm doing here in your flatness, Harding. After my little adventure, the first thing I did was to call the police. And the second was to come here to call on you, the girl who steered me into that shooting gallery. Well, you needn't come to annoyed at me. Of course I advised you to go there, but after all, it was your duty. And you did recover the picture. And I almost lost my health doing it for the third time. Really? Yes, really. When somebody tried to make a see-going paratrooper out of me, then they tried to be part of the pavement by running me down with an auto. And now tonight, somebody on the other side of a door tries to turn it into my personal copy of the pearly gate. That's really enough for me. Mr. Delta, where is the painting now? At Scotland Yard, and now let's change the subject back. What's bothering me is bothering me plenty. I want to know who didn't want me to find that picture, and why. Well, how do you seem elementary? Thank you, Dr. Watts. The police naturally didn't want you to find it. Miss Harding, please. When I got shot at, the apparent thief was dead. Well, they do have henchmen, you know. If he was killed by an accomplice, why did the killer leave the painting? Oh, I'd have no way of knowing. Of that, I'm still not sure. Oh, really? It's $1.50. You're hardly suspecting me. I suspect you left if you stop saying that. At this point, I suspect everyone. Even Dexter Morley, dreaming up this whole painting of the month scheme to bring those pennies within stealing distance. Oh, but that's often living. I know, I know. If that was the plan, he'd wait until he had more than one picture on the road to steal. That's why I don't suspect him. Well, frankly, I don't see why you continue to worry. After all, you're part of the job is done, is it? Yeah, I suppose you're right. But I still have a yearning, burning deep down inside. I made a break somebody's neck. Mind if I use your phone? Talk, no, I'll tell you so. Hello, I want to talk to New York. Don't worry, I'll call to lecture. My name is Johnny Dollar. I want to place a collect call to New York. The number is Plaza 6-9184. Check this please, sir. Your name is John Dollar. In New York, number you're calling is Plaza 6-9184. And the call is a collect, correct? Correct, collect. Right, you are, sir. We can ring up immediately if there's a clear circuit. Thank you. Well, they'll call me. Well, while you're waiting, probably doing a break. You can't pretend. What have you got? No, give it all in, in a lemon, in Italian or different. No, thank you. No, thank you. Well, how much is down over here? Very restful. Much more restful on the eyes where I am. Here I can have a better look at you. However... Well, I'm Mr. Dolly, you can be, Charlie. You mind if I change the mystery for Johnny? It sounds much more fun. Well, swap your wand, Johnny, for every Muriel you let me use. Mr. Bargain, now, tell me about yourself. You're lucky with that, Missy. I'm an absolute bog on criminology. At the moment, Muriel, that happens to be my un-favorite subject. Let's talk about you. Where shall I begin? Just after the age of twenty-one. You're a saucy type. At the age of twenty-one, I was swinging the wire. Huh? The women's air force. Oh, you must have had a lot of exciting adventures. You are, sir. What was the most exciting? Oh, I think perhaps tonight the young U.S. air force catching teeth. Oh, one of the boys of the wild blue yonder. Maybe it was a blue of your eyes. It made him wild. Johnny. I know how he must have felt. He's Johnny. I'll be right back. All right, Johnny. Hello. Are you there? Are you there? Of course I'm here. Mr. Dollar? That's right. We're ready with your call to New York. It's a signal at the end of three minutes. Are you ready to talk? A minute, you stop. Right, you are, sir. Carry on. Hello? Hello. Is this the fine art insurers? I want to talk to Mr. Kimball. Yes, yes, yes, Dollar. I'm on the line. Go ahead. Well, you can stop worrying, Kimball. I got the painting back. You say you did get it back? That's right. It's safe. All you'll have to pay is the price of a new frame. But that could say what happened to the frame? Well, the guy who swiped it took the painting out of the frame. I don't know where it is. Well, I have to cope with what he did with it. I can't, he said. Well, then, look for it. That frame itself is worth $5,000. It was insured on painting. OK, Fred, don't blow out any bridge work. I'll look around for it. You've been everything you've got, Dollar. It's too near doing that already. What do you say? OK, Fred, I'll cable you what happened. Goodbye. Well, Muriel, vacation's over. I just got put back the work. I gathered in your conversation. You want to send you shaking off into the night to look for the picture frame? Yeah, that's it. Oh, it's really distant. But these have probably already found it somewhere, and that fell asleep. No, I'll check that. My work is personal service. Well, Master Bear, Johnny, you're turning hot on tin. Couldn't you put it off your morning? Well, there's nothing I'd like better, but... Couldn't you stay even for a little while? Well, just long enough to calm my nerves. Big Ben was ringing up midnight on Time's greedy cash register. When I finally cleared with a barbie guarding the back alley flat, but it not so long before, given up one on precious life and one very precious painting. The place was darker than it had been on my previous visit. And while I groped the electric switch, I realized why. There had been a brisk fire blazing before. In the bottom grade of the stove, I found enough unburned portions of the hot picture frame to justify my conclusions. And I found something else that came under the category of hot rocks. Since the count, item seven, Cab Bear's office of Dexter Morley. The front door was not only locked, it was barred. However, at the back of the building, I had better luck. A loose window down into the basement. I just broke in a law, but I didn't want to break my neck, so snap on a light. The basement was loaded with cabinet making equipment. But for my dough, they weren't making any cabinets. I was benched with a power drill, and on the floor below it, a pile of sawdust and woodshading. That was long enough, but the sawdust pile was glimming with tiny specks of crystallized glue. With what I had now, all I had to find was Dexter Morley. He made that easy, he found me. Stay down there, fellas. Stay down there, fellas. Stay where you are. Well, welcome home from that trip to Paris you didn't take. That gun in your hand suggested I'm right about one thing anyway. Yes, and that'd be... That whoever took the shot the earlier tonight was probably not an Englishman. The barbies over here don't carry guns, which makes most English mugs afraid to. You're an American. That's interesting, but hardly valuable. I've got some more. How valuable is this? I think you're in awe, or at the head of, a very high-class smuggling racket. And I think you set up that painting of the month scheme of yours to establish just about the neediest method of smuggling that I've ever heard of. You're very generous. I know how I operate, so what you could tell me about it could do nothing more than bore me. What I want from you are the diamonds. Maybe I can trade you. Some diamonds for some answers. You're in no position at bargain. Give me the diamonds throughout, shoot, and take them off you. No, wait a minute. I'd better explain my bargaining position. I think you admit it's not the worst. Since you have to follow me here, you know I took a cab from the murder flat. One without a tail light, so you don't have a number. But, brother, I do. And the diamonds are jammed down behind its back sheet. Now, let's bargain. What? All right. What do you want to know? Just let me do the guessing. And check me if I'm wrong. You set up a chain of famous teams which would move around the world for your branch offices. As each one passed through your hands here, the frame was to be dismantled, and holds bored in it at the joints for the purpose of smuggling diamonds. Like so far? Yes, tell her right. But remember, the more you are right about the worse it is for me. So naturally, the worse it is for you. We'll take care of that later. This scheme of yours is fascinating. The stuff moves around the world in the picture frame, under official armed guard, and enjoying virtual diplomatic immunity through customs. It's great. It would have been great if it hadn't been for that heavy handed oath. Oh, that fills in a missing link. From out of the night comes a burglar. It fills your first loaded picture, shoves the frame into his stove to get rid of it. You arrive, cream him with your guns, and I arrive interrupting you before you get what you want on the burning frame. You saw what happened to him and he resisted me, darling. Now you must realize that I won't hesitate a moment. It works the other way, doesn't it? You kill me, who tells you the number that's actually, and without it, you'll never get your diamond. There are ways to keep your hands behind you. It's painful. I thought so. Your head will wear out before this gun barrel. Oh, feel more like talking? It's just enough to tell you one more thing. You can tell I've blonde accomplice of yours. I was on to her from the start. No, what do you mean? What? Don't you think? I can't repay you for those free tries you made or had made on my life, Moly. But here's what it feels like being hit on the head with a gun. Yeah, rock-a-bye booby. Muriel, look out, you'll fall! I told you, that's a very undignified way for a lady to enter a room through a basement window. Tony, I was only trying to help, and there you were, accusing me of being at a company. After all those nice things, you said to me before. Whoa, wait a minute. Well, I followed you. I wanted to see how you were. Oh, great. You and your criminology. Least you might have stepped in before you hit me. What's in my head? Oh, I'm sorry, Tony. It's just that I love crime. Well, come on, get up. What? It would be a crime, it's just that Moly there woke up and I had to put him back to sleep again before the police got here. What was it all about? It was about these little black things. I've got a pocket full of them. There. Straight one of them with your fingernail. Oh, gosh. Honey, that's the kind of glass that fellow hands his girl when he wants to be engaged to mess here. Tony, Tony, you mean? Uh, yes, I mean only that they're diamonds. Expense accounts, item eight. $350. Plain fare out of attempted matrimony by the party of the second crime. Item nine, $25. Gift to Muriel Harding, two books. One on the art of crime, the other on the art of cookery. In the hopes that the latter might attract her to the pursuits of a more womanly hobby. Item ten, ten cents. Roma Seltzer. Preaches to fine landing at Gander Newfoundland. The only thing still fighting me on this case were those Brussels sprouts I had at dinner in London the night before. Expense account total? Fifteen hundred and sixty-three dollars and forty cents. If you find any slight discrepancy in this amount, in my favor, blame it on my confusion and lack of understanding of the international weight of exchange. The only thing I like to exchange at this point is my head with its two new ups. Wishing you the same, your, uh, truly, Johnny Dollar. [Music] In just a moment, more about Johnny Dollar. The first Academy Award winner, Jane Wyman, comes his guest to the family hour of stars. And Aussie and Harriet return in triumph to CBS. These are two headline making events for next Sunday night. Add these two shows to the top comedy of Jack Benet, the feminine charm and dramatic talent of Helen Hayes and Eve Arden, the ace comedy teams of Amos and Andy and Lemon Abner, and CBS Sunday night makes great news. On top of this, there are the notable mystery capers with Sam Sade, and a laughter with life with Luigi, and it pays to be ignorant. So don't miss a single one of CBS 10 great entertainment next Sunday night when they're heard over most of these same stations. Jack Benet, of course, comes to you over them all. [Music] Listen in again next week when CBS brings you Your Truly Johnny Dollar, with Charles Russell as Johnny. Your Truly Johnny Dollar is written by Paul Dudley and Gil Dow, with music by Mark Warnell, and is produced and directed by Richard Sandville for CBS, the Columbia Broadcasting System. [Music] An official message from Medicare. A new law is helping me save more money on prescription drug costs. You may be able to save too. With Medicare's extra help program, my premium is zero and my out-of-pocket costs are low. Who should apply? Single people making less than $23,000 a year, or married couples who make less than $31,000 a year. Even if you don't think you qualify, it pays to find out. Go to ssa.gov/extrahelp paid for by the US Department of Health and Human Services. Okay, round two. Name something that's not boring. Laundry? Oh, a book club. Computer's Solitaire, huh? Sorry, we were looking for Chumba Casino. Chumba! That's right, Chumba Casino.com has over 100 casino-style games. Join today and play for free for your chance to redeem some serious prizes. ChumbaCasino.com No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.