The Joel Gill Show
Words to live by
All right, we're back with another pod, the pod, the pod I took a break from the pod for all right, today's theme is words to live by words to live by. So we'll get to why this is such a great theme. We'll get to that soon. But words to live by words to live by words to live by. So what are your words to live by? Email him. Email him to the show. And I do have this book, calendar wisdom. And this is, I really should have got this book before I started recording. I should have, I should have, you know what, I'm gonna look for the book and I'm gonna talk about something else while I'm looking for the book and then we will get into words to live by. All right, so I saw my brother. I saw him. I went to visit my brother. He followed in with the podcast. You do know that I made a podcast. It's completely ethering my brother. Just go in, you're a bitch. You're okay. I didn't say that. I didn't say that. I didn't say that. What actually happened was this is how weird my life is turned out. Weird. My life is gone. So I had a fan on my YouTube channel. Turned out this was fake also. I found out this has been such a weird year. This story is fake, but I believed it at the time. I had a fan reach out to me for spiritual guidance on the fact that they were dying. All right. So I had that happen, which was fake. I did find out it was fake. Obviously, that wasn't real. The guy played it perfectly. All right. So my channel was getting astroturf. If you don't know what astroturfing is, I did a whole theme on astroturfing. I did a theme on astroturfing. So you should know that by now. You should know that. This guy, he, come on man. Where's where it's to live by, man. Where's, come on, baby. Give daddy. Give daddy the cashier. Having where it's to live by. Having where it's to live by. Sorry. I'll finish it off with. So when I did believe, I had one fan who was dying. It triggered sort of a mental breakdown in me. Well, I'll be real. I was looking for money. I was looking for money out of my audience. It was, it didn't come how I expected something better than money happened from it, which was insight, which was knowledge. Yeah, that does sound like code. It does sound like code. It does relate to my brother. Where? He doesn't believe in me. That was the thing that blew my mind. I visited him. I was like, this guy doesn't fucking believe in me. I mean, I've known it for a long time, but I visited him. I finally had to confront that fact because I was giving him more great advice, great advice, great advice, great advice, great advice. Hey man, don't get vaccinated. They're great advice, great advice, great advice, great advice. Hey man, maybe he's still drinking great advice, great advice, great advice. I called him a drunk. I don't think he drinks anymore also. I was wrong in that podcast. But maybe he does, he's at Christmas right now. So check my family's Christmas photos. If he's drinking there, he's a doofus. If he's not, then he's, I retract everything I ever said. The guy doesn't believe in me. That was the bitter pill to swallow. I had to swallow that pill. Where I go, what is wrong with this guy? How could you not believe in me? How? How? And he does this shit, this bullshit. We're talking and it's like he won't listen. I wish I could remember what the subject was. I do. I wish I could remember what the topic was. Maybe it was on clients or something. It was on something meaningless. But he finally was like, this guy's an indirect guy. He's indirect. That's the thing I found. And I've been giving myself real talk lately, which has been helpful. So I've been married direct with myself. So I found out the guy who was the star of this podcast forever, that guy didn't respect me. He didn't value my opinion. And it was like that. If you've ever seen, what's it called? What's it called? If you've ever seen usual suspects, you've seen that movie where it all makes sense at the end. So this guy, his life would have been on a rocket ship to the moon if he listened to me on one fucking thing. He wouldn't listen to me on one fucking thing. And then I finally had to detach with love and go, you know what? You're not fucking listening to me on the basics. How am I going to help this guy ever? I made this video being like, here are my parting words. You're probably going to succeed. I guarantee you'll succeed. He's not going to succeed. He's not. I didn't have the heart to tell that to him on a YouTube video because he watches all of my fucking videos for some reason. He watches all of my videos. He's the guy who watches all of my videos. He likes all of my videos. I go to him and all of my videos were directed at him for a while on the things he needed to do to fucking 10 X's life, 100 X, 1000 X's. And this fucking guy didn't respect me. He didn't believe me also. That was the thing. I thought I was like, this makes zero sense. Makes zero sense. Doing something called media deprivation. I have a nap. I'm listening to myself. So that's what I've been doing on this media deprivation. I have been listening to myself speak. That's how out there I am now. That's how in on me I am. That's how much I bought in on me, Project Joel, where my phone, my battery to my headphones just died. I was upset. I was upset because I was listening to a video I was making on Is There Too Much Music. I was absolutely scaring that topic, going into it from 5,000 different angles, being a genius, being funny, being hilarious, goofing on the melon drop, the needle drop, genius. It doesn't come out for a month. So I am listening to that going, this is awesome. I spent 99.9% of my day listening to that final media deprivation plus real talk equals enlightenment video. I go, this is awesome also. These are all such awesome videos, such awesome content, but has zero social proof and no one fucking believes in me yet. That's the thing. No one believes in me. Which I had another great video I was listening to. I was going to sleep listening to my own fucking video. Which sounds insane unless you listen to that video and you go, this is genius. This is the diamond in the rock. This is amazing. Why doesn't this have 10 billion views? And I realize it's to YouTube is beneath me. That's what I realize. I go, why am I wasting my time on YouTube? It's beneath me. Any fucking goof can do YouTube. It's beneath me. Mr. Beast can do master YouTube. Get the fuck away from that. Who cares? It's beneath me. It's beneath me. To start on. I'll do it. I'll do it once. I've conquered in real life shit. That's what I realized. In real life shit. And this was the benefit of my brother attempting to fucking have real talks with me. No, I actually had to infer with this guy still. I still had to infer with this guy. Where I'm giving him an opinion. I can't even remember what it is. And he goes, I only listen to people when they have external things I can point to which sort of validate their opinion. So your world, I was talking about conspiracies. That was the thing. And he was like, your worldview. You live at home. What else? You're beneath me. I pity you. That's what this fuck said to me once. And that is where my anger stemmed from. Where this guy in a text message says he pities me. He pities me. Joel. Mr. Voice of a nightingale. I have the voice of a nightingale. Mr. huge. Mr. huge. I've got a huge cock. Mr. Eigen will. I can stop drinking. I stop drinking on the drop of a dime. I did that. I got through DTs by myself, not by myself. Shout out to my family. I got through fucking DTs. I could do that. I could do it again for the fucking love of the game. I could. I'm not going to. I don't even like joking about that. But I could. I kill most people. Most been dying from that. I got through it with God on my side. And I like to put myself up more. No, I'll pump up my God. My God. So this guy doesn't believe in me. That's what he says. He's like, your worldview has got you where you are. I need social proof. He's another fucking social proof guy. My own brother needs social proof before he fucking believes in me. That's what I find out. That's what he says. He kind of half says. And I go, OK, all right. And I go, all right. You're out of the foxhole. That's what I think. I go. This guy is out of my foxhole. He's out of it. He is out of the foxhole. So if you don't know, if you haven't watched all my videos, what is wrong with you? No, you haven't watched all my videos. The foxhole is, you know what, you should be able to infer what the fuck I mean by the foxhole. Someone's in your foxhole. It's team. You burst the fucking world. It's you and them. That's the fucking world. I thought my brother was in my fucking foxhole. He isn't. He isn't, which is fine, which is fine. So when I'm telling him, when I'm talking to him, when I'm explaining to him that I have the keys to his Bitcoin consulting fucking daydream, whatever the fuck that is. When I tell that to this guy, and he goes, "No, I don't believe in you. I don't fucking believe in you." That's what he says to me. "I have to infer. I have to infer that." He doesn't believe in me. Which you go, "All right, DJ Khaled. All right, DJ Khaled. They don't believe in me." Which is even more reason to succeed. And to help him is still, that's the thing DJ Khaled does, which I look like, where he goes. I remember when these fox didn't believe in me, wouldn't help me. I remember that. And I'm still going to fucking help them still. But I thought he would be the first guy. I thought he could be the first guy. I was like, "All right, let's do Bitcoin consulting." Maybe for the fucking love of God, you've been talking about this for fucking five years or whatever the fuck he's talking about. You've been talking about this for so long. Maybe for the love of God, you followed the fucking blueprint, which Andrew Kirby handed me. He gifted me this. I have a millionaire. I have a part owner in school, which is going to sound insane next year. When the digital ID comes in and everyone's migrating to different platforms, because of course, you're not going to fucking sign up on a digital ID just to use fucking Facebook or Instagram or whatever the fuck it is. Everyone migrates to school. The fucking co-owner of that has a personal interest in me. Fucking salutes me when I comment. When I comment on his content, he fucking salutes me. This guy gave me his blueprint, which is genius. It is genius, which I didn't get round to doing for myself because of that other fucking guy, which I do I touch on this again. This is words to live by. This is the theme of this episode. Should have got quotes. I abandoned looking for the quotes. I closed my eyes. I got myself righteous rant. I got on myself righteous rant with my own fucking brother. Can't listen to this podcast and imagine. Close your eyes. Imagine that I have a fucking microphone. What better this would be if I had a microphone if I wasn't just doing this from my fucking iPhone, because that's how committed I am to success. I'm not waiting for the gear. I'm going then providence moves. It does move. So I go to this guy. Hey man, I could fucking shortcut your Bitcoin fucking fantasy daydream, which you're never going to fucking do, aren't you? You're never going to do it because he's a fucking, I was about to call him a bitch. He's not a bitch. He's actually, after visiting him, I was like, I know he's got his hands full. He's got his hands full. That was what happened was like, I know he doesn't have time. He doesn't have time for it. And I go, buddy, I'll fucking do everything you need to succeed. Well, I would just get fucking everything you need to succeed at your little Bitcoin thing. I could do that. I could will you do greatness there. I say that to this guy. He gets offended, he gets weirded out when I do it. I go, no, he doesn't believe in me. That's the thing that finally gets me. The penny drops. No one fucking believes in me, except one of my brothers. He does not believe in me. They'll say weird things to try and to cut me. There you go. He believes in me so much. He's like, no, your success kind of will threaten me, which I understand also. Because I'm DJ, but I'm DJ Khaled. I'm, you can either win with me or watch me win these fucks. He is in my foxhole. One of my brothers is in my foxhole. He is. He is. He'll get further than that. But one of them is because he doesn't need social proof. He doesn't. He looks at me. He goes in that. This guy is onto something. He does see that. So he does believe in me. Shout out. I do have one person who believes in me. It gets me so angry, man. It gets me. It doesn't get me angry at all, actually. You're not a fan of, they need social proof. They need social proof. They need social proof. They need social proof. He was looking at my YouTube going, this YouTube is fucking goofy. He would never say that. He would never say that to me because he's a fucking indirect fuck. He would never actually just come out and be like, this is fuck. He didn't actually want to be like, I've seen your YouTube. You're a fucking weirder. He said that to me. When I was like, you're a fucking, what was I angry about him again? I was like, oh, stop talking to me about fucking Bitcoin. I have fucking food to eat. This guy's talking to me. I'm sorry. This is what I was going through. I have fucking food to eat. And this guy messages me, spend your money on fucking Bitcoin. I don't have fucking food to eat. And this is the fucking tip my brother is giving me. This is the tips my brother gives me. Hey, spend your money on fucking Bitcoin. I had this podcast called performance anxiety, which I did make the call to action to him personally being like, hey, you want to invest in the podcast? Maybe do it. Maybe don't do it. I don't even know if you fucking listen to it because this guy's that indirect. He's that indirect where maybe he listened to it. I was just like, yeah, we're not even fucking acknowledge the fact that my brother wanted to partner up with me on something. That guy is that indirect. You go fair enough. It's actually direct though. It is actually direct. And this is what has been driving me insane for the last, I don't know how many months, these indirect, cowardice men. There you go. You can't even, you can't even got to be like, does this guy actually think I can succeed or not? Nope. He doesn't. He doesn't. You finally figure it out one day when you actually visit him and he goes, nope, I don't value your opinion. Even though you were the fucking guy who told me not to get vaccinated, even though you saw through that fucking sign up and all you do is see through science. All you do is when all you do is all you are is correct, correct, correct, correct. That's my curse. I said that on my channel as a joke. I was like, I'm cursed to be correct all the time. And nobody listens to me ever. I said that was my curse. And you know what? I'll be correct again when I say I am a huge success. I am a huge success. I am a genius. I do have a voice, the voice of an ironingale. I am the funniest fucking human being on planet fucking Earth probably. Maybe. It was funnier than me. I was cleaning maggots today. This was me today. With maggots in my kitchen for like the third time, the first time I was like, this is kind of gross. The second time I'm like, something fucking smells somewhere. Where do I, where are these maggots coming from? The third time I'm cleaning them up, I'm calling them maggots. I'm like, get out of here, you fucking maggot. I'm pretending I'm a drill sergeant as I'm cleaning them up, go get me 50 push-ups, you fucking maggot. To literal maggots, that is funny. That is hilarious. That could be in a fucking movie. And this is nothing to me. This is pittance to me. This is just the way I walk through life. That funny. I'm getting, I don't know what I want to talk about. I'm getting your fucking astroturf to heck. A guy, I, in one of my gems of a video is called, what was it called, media deprivation where I lay it out? I lay out the keys to the kingdoms of some guy. I lay that out. The keys to the kingdom, the answer to all those problems, I lay that out to a guy. I say, you get an astrot, sorry, this is hard to explain. But the guy is getting astroturf, no, go back because it's all my podcast and it will make sense. The guy is getting astroturf. I go, hey man, you're getting astroturf. He doesn't believe in me. He doesn't value my opinion, which actually hurts. Now I think about it where this fucking guy didn't believe in me. And then you go, no, this guy's a moron. He's a moron. He's that easy to get tricked where he has fucking me. He has me walk up to him, pick him out of maybe a hundred people I had identified and go, all right buddy, let's go to the fucking moon. But he's so fucking stupid. Sorry, he's so dumb that he didn't believe me. He didn't believe in me. This guy didn't believe in me. So I should actually be honored that this guy didn't believe in me because this guy is so wrong on everything that that must mean it's a fucking anyone else on planet earth could be like, whoa, this is the golden goose. This is a gift horse. The fact that this guy, this guy who, if his mother buys him a drum set, he yells at her, this guy, this guy, this guy, this guy. The fact that this guy didn't believe in you should be more confirmation of your success as an inevitability. And the fact that your own brother didn't believe, doesn't believe in you. Also, you know what, I'm not going to get angry at them. They need social proof. These are the cowards. The cowards, that's the thing. There you go. All right, you're a coward. You need social proof. You're like one of these bimbos with handbags. It's like, all right, I need to fucking see another human being with this handbag before I think it's worth having. All these bimbos with the people with the men, they let come inside. That's such fucking, this happened with me with women as well. They need to know that other women are getting fucked by you before they're like, all right, he's fucking everyone out there. Maybe I'll let him fucking come inside me and get me pregnant and we'll have an fucking abortion. Maybe then, and I don't know, sweetie, I'm righteous. I'm the last righteous alpha male. I could have them, but I don't. I don't have refuse, you fool. I refuse. I lower my gaze. I walk through life lowering my gaze and they're like, no, you're fucking lame then. I'm like, no, you don't understand, honey, you don't. You don't understand the amount of weird situations with women trying to fucking, you know, I'm not going to talk about that anymore because I don't care because it is beneath me. This is what these guys are to me now. Where you go, you're like one of these fucking bimbo's who needs to. I actually did this with a woman once. I actually pretty much, what this was in the performance anxiety episode, pretty much fucked a woman right in front of her to let her know, you know what, I did want to date you. I was going to say no, I did, I did have a thing for you. Now you get to watch me, you get to watch me with your fucking roommate, you get to watch that because you didn't, and then you know what, she, of course, this is where it's to live by. I just realized that words to live by fucking me, me. Anything I say is words to live by, right? That's the new angle because I don't want to actually have to dig out the quotes I don't know. I will find the book. We'll talk about Tolstoy and how this guy, this guy, you know, I'll talk about that later. I teased it, I teased it, there's a little tease for the podcast where, you know what, Tolstoy, greatest writer of all time, fuck Shakespeare, Shakespeare's a goof, he's dumb, he's goofy, a red hamlet, a grave digger's who fucking cares, who cares, Shakespeare's a goof, you know who I got that from Tolstoy. He would fucking write essays on what a goof Shakespeare is. I haven't even read Shakespeare because Tolstoy goofed on a madard into oblivion, you know, it's not even worth my time. It's not even Shakespeare isn't even worth my fucking time. This is how on a rocket ship to the moon I am, where I look at, I look, I have the complete works of Shakespeare right in front of me, I do. Talk about synchronicity, I have it right there and I piss on it. You know, this Shakespeare isn't worth my fucking time because I'm on immediate deprivation and this is the advice Tolstoy gives you where too much reading, too much of other people's thinking it fucking fucks with your mind. So I look at this, I get Shakespeare, did Shakespeare ever fucking clean maggots off the floor and call the maggots in a funny way? Or is it like, yeah, you give me 50 jumping jacks, you maggot. Shakespeare ever do that, no he didn't, so I'm fucking, I am better than Shakespeare. The complete works of Shakespeare. I like some of his poems actually, I thought about it, I thought about it and then I remember a story I wrote called "Numbed Disgraces" which I submitted to the great Australian yawn and I was like, how didn't this win? I was confused, it was great, it was great, I thought about it in reflection, it was alright, I'll give you the, what is to live by, the fucking, what I was writing, what is to live by, I'll give you this story, Kafka ask genius, absolutely genius in terms of a futuristic novel, "Numbed Disgraces" it's a play on fucking William Shakespeare's poem, "Numbed Graces", I inverted Shakespeare, what's the poem again? It's sonnets, it's like, da da da da, "Numbed Graces" poet lies, something like that, I wish I could remember it, I memorized it to fucking impress bitches, help me honest, that's what I did, I was in to pick up artist community, impress women, I thought, I'll learn a bit of Shakespeare, a little bit of Willy Shakespeare, and then you realize, women didn't even care about that, they just, I'm getting too into positive self-thought, I'm like, nope, they just wanted me to fucking, sorry, I'm not talking about that, anyway, you have to read my book, so I get all my weird sex thoughts out, it is funny then, it is funny. So this was the story, I made, "Numbed Disgraces", it was set in the future, and it was based on the fact that, geez, this is genius, geez no one recognizes this was genius, and it's social proof, once one person goes, ah, this guy is a fucking genius, then everyone else will be like, oh, maybe we can fucking admit he's a genius, but my own fucking brother couldn't be one of the first people to do that, he couldn't, he couldn't do that, so it would kill him, it would kill him to admit that, to go, not only is my brother fucking sexy, not only does my brother have the voice of a nightingale, not only is my brother funnier than me, not only is my brother, what else is that guy boy, not only is he fucking mentally stronger than me, not only is that, not only the audio, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, he's also a fucking genius, he's a genius, so he couldn't admit that, it would kill him, it would kill him, I was right, I was correct again, I said I'm an insane voice memo, I said I'm an insane voice memo being like, you're threatened by my genius, and he listened to it, I was like, you sound mentally ill and I go bad, genius strikes again, once other people recognize this as genius, then you can be like, oh my god, fucking, oh, it was a genius voice memo, alright, all these fucking guys, man, these fucking time wastes, that's what it is, that's what it is, I waste my time, I waste my energy, I waste my energy on these guys, no more, no longer, I'm going out into the street, I'm going straight to fucking crowd, straight to crowd, you could, I couldn't start with the people around me, I couldn't, I tried, they wouldn't fucking look at me, so I gotta go to strangers on the fucking street, man, I'll fucking busk, that's what I'm going to do, I'm going to stop busking, because I was going to post me playing a jigsaw falling into place, yes I can play that on guitar, yes I told myself how to play guitar, yes I told myself how to play piano, yes I have the voice of a night and go, yes I'm actually, I got about a billion awesome songs in the vault, which I'm just looking for a fucking laptop, a lot of guys for Lunatic's will come out when I have the fucking equipment for it, I'm waiting, I almost did it with my phone, I almost did it with my fucking phone, I almost did it with my fucking phone, so get to the story, number disgracees, number disgracees, so yes we've already established, that's a play on William Shakespeare, poetic line, I've gone, alright Shakespeare, you're a goof, I'll take one of your best lines ever, which no one else knows about, so the people fucking evaluating my story probably didn't even get, that was a reference to William Shakespeare, he didn't, so yes that was what my short story was titled, that was the title, that was a title, and not only is that a nod to every other futuristic novel, okay two others, two others, what's the one, Brave New World by Aldous Hoxley, Brave New World is a reference to a William Shakespeare thing, alright, wish I could remember which one it is, who cares, and Infinite Jest, and Infinite Jest, which is a reference to Hamlet, alright, so I actually have read Hamlet, and I was like this isn't even good, those were my honest thoughts when I was reading Hamlet, I was like this is alright I guess, okay, okay, and then everyone else was like no you don't get it, I'm like alright I'm reading it, I'm better than this, yeah I'm reading Hamlet, I'm going why am I wasting my time with William Shakespeare, why, when I could fucking simply go for a walk, and my thoughts, my own fucking point of view, shits on Shakespeare, it does, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, in all humility, I like humility but in all humility Shakespeare, I should be using the complete works of Shakespeare as a fucking cum rag, with the genius I have in my mind, this happened with James Joyce, I finally read him and I was like oh no he's great, for so long I was like James Joyce is arrogant, he's a goof, a red grace, I was like oh no this guy is a genius, I do like him, so maybe that will happen with Shakespeare, maybe that will be, what's the live by, what's James Joyce's, what's the live by, this is a genius I have, yes I do have a video on reading War and Peace is like, and it's got like 30 fucking thousand views, yes I do have that, you know what I mean, I'm not even gonna talk about it, I'm not even gonna talk about it, because I was reading James Joyce's Ulysses the second time was rereading it, I was reading, I was like a still coronation day, I got a song from James Joyce's Ulysses called Coronation's Day, it's a fucking amazing song, no one's even gonna understand that it's payday, it's a payday, that's what coronation day is, it's what it means, I have to fucking explain that to people, wouldn't I, wouldn't I, I'd have to be like alright guys, to intro this song, coronation day means payday, that's the introduction or need fucking cliff notes, like this is actually genius, but no one's gonna get it until one fucking guy goes oh this guy's a genius, and then everyone else would be like okay we can finally admit it, it was killing us this entire time, this guy is a genius, I'm really telling you guys try out positive self talk, it's great, because I'm starting to believe me, I'm believing me now, I'm like yeah that is genius, and yes I did write a fucking song on the piano, yes I did teach myself how to play piano, yes I did do that, yes I did do that, I didn't get fucking sorry, I just went into resentments, I no longer voice resentments, but yes my mother was so enamored by me, being around me, that I actually worked out what it was where she wouldn't let, she wouldn't get me karate lessons, or their piano lessons or any of that shit that she got all my other siblings, which I did resent her for, and then I realized no she had me, she needed me around her, she needed me, she was like no they can't have you, I need you around me, because you're that fucking amazing, this was my mother, this was my, this is how I rewrote history, I get no that wasn't neglect, it wasn't, it was her going what is this guy gonna say, he's a genius, he's a genius, wasn't neglect, it actually wasn't, she got me gymnastics shit as well, so did I do my fucking resentment theme, I think I did that already, I got my fucking father wouldn't even buy me a trip to Fiji, that's the one that always cracks me up, as a resentment, because it makes perfect sense to me, I'm gonna keep saying that, I'm gonna, that's my new line on my father, I got this fucking guy wouldn't even buy me a trip to fucking, wouldn't even get me a fucking holiday to Fiji, that's genius, no one gets my genius, words to live by fucking anything I say is words to live by, that's the theme of this episode, you fucking fools, maybe I'll send this to my brother, he doesn't believe in me, so what the fuck is the point, that's the other thing, all right he'll listen to this he'll go yes this is fucking hilarious, yes I'm the only person viewing this, maybe it isn't good, maybe it isn't genius, maybe he's insane, maybe shut up, shut up you fucking fool, you fool, and don't listen to my, any of my other podcasts where I annihilate you, no one of them is funny, one of them is funny, what's it called, the domestic violence they miss funny, go check that out and go, oh no I need social proof, I need, I need social proof, I need, this guy needs success in life before I can listen to him, you fucking moron, there you go you fucking moron, absolute buffoonery, absolute buffoonery, to me when I hear a guy say that it's like success and I'm me, that's the success of life, being me is success, I already won the lottery kid, what are you talking about, I already won the fucking lottery being born me, that is the success of life, anything else is fucking pitant, it's trivia to me, anything else is trivial, money is trivia, the trappings of success are trivia, women begging to blow me is trivia, it's all trivial to me kid, sorry, maybe I'll do an impression of my brother, now maybe I'll go back to 24/7 badminton, that was a funny impression, we need social proof before we'll admit you're the fucking man, I go I don't need, gets me angry man, this is 38 minutes, I am getting back on the podcast, the podcast is moron, so also a huge thank you to my brother for inspiring the podcast, which of course he listened to that first podcast and was like this is fucking gold, this is genius, of course he listened to that, which was me waking up in the morning one day going all right I'll fucking make a podcast, why not, that was how it started, that was the origin story, of course I shut out fucking genius, first fucking take, of course I did that he listened to it, he goes yeah this is genius and then he doubts it, he doubts me, he fucking doubts me when he reflects, he goes yeah this is genius, maybe my next podcast wasn't good, cause you know what the next podcast was just me being like let's get into the fucking habit, let's get into the swing of things, I'll go for a fucking walk, I'll talk about Ulysses, what the fuck did I even talk about, I'll talk about Infinite Jest, I'll fucking 99.9% of my content was geared around a guy who was about to hang himself, I'll be real, I lied on my YouTube channel, I was like nah he's a cool guy, he's smart, I go nope he still is probably gonna hang himself, I'm sorry, that was the lie, a bit, to claim my conscience I had to be like nope you're a cool guy, he is a cool guy, he also reflected on it, he likes to run he's bendy, shout out to the 24/7 betterment channel, he is a cool guy, but no this guy couldn't even fucking, this is fun, words to live by, I think I got sushi somewhere, coming, so I'll have to wrap this up, put a bow in this, not yet, what am I talking about, I'll keep going for a bit, because I haven't even got to what number disgrace is what's about, you know, I haven't even got to that, because well there's genius here, there's genius there, there's genius fucking everywhere, words to live by fucking whatever I am saying, so yes of course my first podcast, first, your first things are supposed to be bad, that's conventional wisdom, my first podcast ever, this fucking amazing, the second one is bad, a few of them did get bad, it'll be real, then they got great again, that was the thing, they went bad, good, they got great, what is it again, great creator, I will take care of the quantity, you take care of the quality, so that's what I was doing, I was like you know what, I'll put the numbers up, a force greater than me will take care of the quality, because that's how geniuses do it, they go you know what, I show up, I fucking, I put my fucking cock out there, I put my fucking balls on the line, I do that daily, and a force greater than my own will, because that is genius where you go, you know what, I'm a limited fucking human, just let me be a transceiver, a receiver, a radio, let me jack into higher spiritual forces and then I'll shit out some fucking genius, that's what I do, what was my point again, what was my point again, oh what was my point again, I don't know what my point again was, you know what, I've wrapped up fucking numbered disgracees, so I did this maybe three years ago, yes I do write a futuristic number, a short story, I write a short story called numbered disgracees on the fact that in the fucking future, the biggest problem that no one has identified is scrubbing your digital track record from the internet, deleting all of your fucking shit from the internet is going to be the biggest problem, what was the inspiration for this, shout out to James Joyce again, you can go back and read his letters to his fucking wife, where it's like a one of smell your fucking farts, that was the shit this guy was writing to his wife, now that is genius, he's like I want to smell your fucking farts, you sexy fucking bitch, that is what James Joyce the genius was writing to his wife, and yeah that's pretty cool, I'm gonna steal that, that is what James Joyce was writing to his wife and you go, that is also the kind of shit I know, what was the kind of shit that I was writing to women, now I want scrubbed from the internet, oh I miss you, I miss you, I was writing fucking a sorry, I always get tripped up between how do you describe the whores, I'll be right, how do you describe the whores in a politically correct way you go, she was a bride of Satan, that's the only way I fucking reconciled having a woman like this in my life, where my cats, my cats who are energetic geniuses, ran from her, they ran, they saw her, they ran, they were like this fucking woman is a succubus, it turns me on to say it still, there you go, yes she was, but anyway, so the fact that I was writing to this woman who was getting fucking plowed by rugby league teams, it was the shit she told me, she was like yep, I think it was too, she was the fucking, you know how they, what is it, what, why'd everybody call it, you know how in football soccer, you have a cup of tea with the teams afterwards, in rugby league they would fucking, they would share this woman, both teams, so she never, she, she did not clarify whether it was one team, I'm gonna, it's more fun to assume that it was two rugby league teams after the fucking game, fucking rape her, all right that was what she actually said, so it wasn't that funny, it wasn't that, no it wasn't funny at the time, I got, I'll be real, I was like I fucking should have won a condom, that was actually what happened to me, I was like oh the fuck, oh my god, just don't come in me, all right, that was fucking, you know what, I survived, I survived anyway, oh I've got an amazing song called I survived, I survived, don't ask now but I'm still alive, got between John Jones and his next drink, his fucking genius, that's a crazy thing to do, got between John Jones and his next drink, yes you could say my mind is on the blink, you could say my mind is on the blink, this is a, this is the fucking genius, I shit out for the fucking fun of it, I've got these fucks not believing in me, not, wanting social proof, I've got these fucks wanting this for me, it's crazy, it's madness, fair enough, you know, it is fair enough, most people aren't genius, that's the thing, most people aren't like me, who go, 99.9% of the things people value, no one's ever read a fucking book on stoicism, or Marcus Aurelius, where you know, 99.9% of the things people admire and want are fucking pointless, so why go after it, and then you, and then these other goofs look at you, and they go, he's not going after fucking trivia, he has nothing to point to in his life and he goes, you fucking goof, absolute goofball, it's me, that's the, that's the thing I need, everything else is fucking a waste of time, to me, personal, even though I've got a view, I don't fucking care about that, you know, no, it is a great view, sorry that's way too inside, you go, no it's a great view, it's a great view, it is a great view, you know what, these fucks don't actually believe in you, it was what I actually realized, they don't, they don't, hello, thank you, it was the door open, it was the, oh my god there is sushi, as sushi, I talked about it, I talked about it, it manifested, I talked about it, it manifested, I talked about it, it manifested, I talked about it, it manifested, so that's genius, that is genius, I think my brother is still that, I think my brother is still there listening to me, is he still there, mark you there, check it out, go check it out, yeah he is there, because this is the genius, this is the genius, they don't believe in you, that guy does believe in me though, he bought me fucking sushi, that's belief, he believes in me, he actually does, he saw me playing piano recently, and he teared up, he was like man you can play fucking piano, that's amazing, that's amazing, so yep that guy does believe in me, yep that guy is in my foxhole, yep I'm not even gonna make the fun get jokes anymore, that guy does believe in me, he threw me off, that's the thing about genius, that's the thing about being a genius, you get thrown off by people offering you sushi, that's an inconvenience to me, someone coming hey, his fucking sushi, is an inconvenience, and this is what other people's lives are of all around, to me that's an inconvenience, I didn't even get onto what I was to live by now, yet I will, I have a 14% battery, you know what, I'm actually buying some equipment, you know what, I actually do have a microphone, but I couldn't be bothered fucking setting it up, you know what I mean, so I haven't even set it up yet, so I might do that, I might do it, I just remember where it's to live by, where's to live by, you know what, am I going to fucking tie off this loose end or what the fuck, that short story I wrote, which was genius, which is, I actually probably just needed feedback on it from impartial, helpful people, that's the thing, so go back to my writers group, I haven't fucking even joined my writers group yet, what am I talking about? So I could have taken that, they could have ironed out the stuff that isn't genius, that's the thing, back in an actual feedback, objective feedback, because yes I have gone overboard, where I go, nope, I am fucking pure genius, that is true though, where you should, nope, I am a genius, I am, what is genius, it's being yourself, that is genius, to be yourself in this crazy world is genius, a guy who is himself is genius, I'm trying to be me, I'm not trying to be you, fucking you, do I send this to my brother, do I not send this to my brother, again, I'm not going to send it to him, he's late to the party, that's the thing, he got invited to the fucking party, he saw there was no one there, and he left, that's what he did, he left, he left the party, but I will invite, I will invite him back, it's always open to him still, it is, but, he doesn't believe in me, that was the hard pill to swallow, we go, no, you know what, fucking real talk, he doesn't believe in me, move on, move on, and he does like it that you're a little bit beneath him, he does, he does need that, you know, dynamic our relationship, he does think he's better than you, he does, he thinks he's better than you, it's just crazy, that's the craziest part of you, this guy thinks he's better than me, because you've got a fucking job, and an apartment, and a wife and kids, and what else does he have, and a car, and what else does he have, and a fucking, and that's it, he's got a job, he's got a wife and kids, I think he pays his rent, and for that he thinks he's better than me, and he's got bitcoin, and he goes, that's fucking pittance, that's pennies to me, because words to live by, I'm the words to live by, you know, I will tie that loose end off of what numbered disgrace is about, but words to live by, from Tolstoy himself are the point of life, the meaning of fucking life is, when you take death and account, so the only meaning of life with death, the inevitability of death, so anything that doesn't account for the fact you're gonna fucking die like bitcoin, anything that doesn't account for the fact that you're limited being, is fucking pointless, and to orientate your life around, to focus on, so this is Tolstoy again, where he gooped on Shakespeare, he also goofs on himself, so this is where the words to live by really comes from, but Tolstoy himself goes, don't even read my fucking books, they suck, they're fucking pointless, which is the funniest goof of all time, where he goes, Shakespeare's the best writer of all time, no Shakespeare sucks, and he goes, oh maybe it's Tolstoy, and he goes, no I suck also, he goes, just read my book of quotes, I got a nice little book, I got every, I spent my entire life reading, I taught myself Hebrew, I know fucking every language on planet earth, read every book, the ancient Greeks, Solon, I read fucking Solon, who else is reading Solon, he even knows about Solon, but I think he's the guy who taught Pythagoras, or Plato, no he's the guy who taught Plato, god I'm a fucking genius, who has this in the fucking back of that brain, I've got my fucking brother, you need something to put to in life, beyond your fucking genius, this is what I point to, I go listen to me fucking to speak, this is what I point to, this is all I need, my fucking voice and a microphone, that's all I need, and I'd like my guitar, my piano and my fucking, but I don't need them, I don't need them, I don't need them, I could go out on the street and I could fucking go, hey listen to me do this, and people should be kissing my feet, like the old fucking philosophers, the balancing act we go, I like to put myself up, it might be a little unlikable, anyway so the point of this is this is how you should be talking to yourself also, so you know, in all humility, give it all to god, that's my nice little out, where I go, no no, my genius, my brilliance is just a testimony of god, right there boom, humble again, humility, that's the thing, so yeah Tolstoy, he goes, my books are fucking dumb, Shakespeare's dumb, reading is dumb, it says that, you fucking read books, what a fucking waste of time, just get, yes I taught myself Hebrew, he did that, he taught himself fucking Hebrew, but I could do that also Tolstoy, so it's probably not even that impressive, I'm teaching myself Latin, that's what I'm doing, not doing that, I thought about doing it, I was like it seems like a lot of effort, although Latin does seem like the, what do they call it, you know how English you need to know English, say I try, I try sound dumb again, you know, to be like the comment man, after this whole, I am the innovator, I am the genius, I'm just like you, you fucking rubes, so you know how English, to fly a plane you need to know English, I do believe for spiritual things, you need to know Latin, you need to know Latin or Arabic or Aramaic or some of these languages, like English is not the language of the spirit, it isn't, I don't think, it's the mongrel, sorry, I just had another idea, another project I worked on, called English is the mongrel tongue, English is the mongrel tongue, it was a girl I learned from, I wish I could remember the rest of that, so that is a play on Spanish as the loving tongue, Spanish as the loving tongue is about a guy who falls in love with a girl who speaks Spanish, she teaches them Spanish, English as the mongrel tongue was a song I wrote about fucking chav from Bethnal Green telling me to fuck her in the toilet, okay and you should fuck me in the, you wanna go fuck in the toilet, I wrote a song about that, it's genius, it is genius, okay what anyone says, it's genius to me, so this guy, what was my point again, all right Tolstoy, he goes books are dumb, I'm dumb, Shakespeare's dumb, here are the quotes, just here are the quotes you need to live by, just read these over again, read them over and over again, over and over again, over and over again, and of course he does tell you the meaning of life there, which is the soul's spiritual perfection, accounting for the fact that you're gonna fucking die, your soul's growth is the only thing that is important and he also does have a quote about a guy, like people considering themselves happy because they have wife and kids and fucking whatever the fuck they have and go and that's not happiness, a guy basing his happiness on that is fucking one car accident away from being a complete lemon, sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm not gonna send this to my brother, so it doesn't matter, you know a guy basing his happiness on that is a fool, it's a foolish thing to do, I wish I could remember what he says to me, it's actually made, no it's all spiritual perfection, that is what you should be focusing on, that is the most important thing to work on, so yes my brother does always say that, he's like, ask yourself the question, what is the most important thing I can be working on, there you go, yeah, you fucking goofball, I knew that fucking 10 years ago, it's my soul's spiritual perfection, everything else is minutiae, it's trivia, everything else else is a fucking waste of time, having a family is a waste of time, being a contributing member to society is a waste of time, paying your taxes is a waste of fucking time, getting a job is a waste of fucking time unless it contributes to the growth of your soul, accounting for the fact that you aren't gonna die, fucking ego maniacs won't even admit that I'm the genius, they won't even admit that I am the biggest fucking genius on planet earth, they want these fucking ego maniacs, can't even look at me with my 651 subscribers, and my podcast, that is me speaking into an iPhone, they can't even look at that and go, nope, this guy is a genius, they can't even suspend the disbelief, they can't even see the picture, they can't even do that, shame on these motherfuckers, that's actually what I reached, I just went, and of course they can't, they're fucking goofs, of course they can't recognize that they're in the fucking presence of, imagine Bob Dylan, imagine Norm McDonald having fucking sweet passionate sex, sorry, imagine that, imagine them shitting out a baby, and imagine that baby being me, so maybe you should add another, maybe I should use a sexy bitch, I'll throw in that, no, I'm not gonna do that, enough with a sexy bitch talkie, that turns you on, you're still celibate, 10% battery, I am at it now, 10% at battery, I am at it now, so I could go days and days and days and days and days on this topic of words to live by me, words to live by a fucking night podcast, that's what I should be saying, but in reality Tolstoy is just like, just read these quotes, that's all you need, the words to live by, and this did start from me goofing on Winston Churchill and one of his quotes which is like, sometimes our best is in and of, sometimes we need to do what is necessary, and I was like yep, that's a good quote, it would be good, it would be better if it wasn't from Winston Churchill, that fucking drunk, I like to wake up and I like to drink champagne, of course you do, of course you do Winston Churchill, you can't even go through fucking war, so just shut up, I don't care what you think, on anything, on anything I could have, I should have been private, I could, I could do that if I wanted, it wouldn't add to the perfection of myself, it's not even worth my fucking time, that's why I try to explain to these people, yes I could immigrate back to fucking England, yes I could, sorry I gotta wrap this up, this sushi somewhere, yes I could immigrate, yes I could fucking become prime minister if I wanted, it's not worth my fucking time, that's why I try to explain to these folks, because how would that grow my soul, how would that grow, it's not worth my fucking time, that's what I try to explain to these folks, being prime minister of the fucking united kingdom isn't worth my time, supreme leader of fucking planet earth, maybe, maybe you could coax me into politics there, then, and then more genius comes out in my mind where I go, yes I did have a short fucking story about the mystery party, yes I had a short story on that, where I went, yes Australia are degenerate fucking gambling addicts, yes, and yes you could win the election or whatever, how the fuck this, this fugazi of an electoral system works, and then I never looked into it, I was slow in school, so is it genius some places, slow other places, yes, yes, of course, I wrote a short story on how a guy, no, not even a guy, it's like a question mark, like the Simpsons, so you know how in the Simpsons they're like what's in the box, what's in the box, you guys don't know that, you know what, this just reminded me of my fucking brother who said my favorite show as a child was the Simpsons, this guy doesn't even fucking know me, doesn't even fucking know me, he's like I'll know what his favorite show as a child is, the Simpsons, I go what the fuck are you talking about, you're wrong, you're incorrect, you fucking goof, that's my, that's still my, that's my favorite show as an adult, as an adult that's my favorite show, as a child, postman pat, of course it's postman pat, so this guy doesn't even fucking know you, so fair enough, fair enough, Simpsons was a good, you know what, it probably was a good guess, who knows, I don't know what his favorite show is, that's the other thing where you go I don't know anything about him either, I do believe, I do believe in him though, that's the thing, that annoyed me, I'm like I believe in you, like yeah, of course you could be fucking doing Bitcoin consulting or whatever the fuck your fucking meaningless goals are, of course you could be making 10,000, an extra 10,000 dollars a month doing that, and of course you could, so I believed in him there, I tried to help him there, fucking pissed on me, that's all that happens with these folks, I try to help them, extend their hand, they fucking piss on me, you know what, these folks need social proof, that's the thing, yes I will help them, I still will help them, that's the thing where, of course I'll still help them, they've got to be, there may be like the thousandth person I've helped, maybe then they'll go, you know what, maybe I'll fucking listen to this guy on the fucking Bitcoin consulting, geez Louise, it's such a meaningless bullshit, go away, you go, it's easy, set up a community, set up a free community on your fucking Instagram, instead of fucking posting whatever the fuck you post about fucking war shit, go hey, I have a free community, free, it's free, I have a free community, join my free community on school, school, which is the future, which I am a master at, I became a master at, this fucking guy man, yes I did become a master of the next Facebook, I'm already there, I'm already there, I've already set up a thousand fucking honeypots in a thousand different communities, all leading back to my community, don't quit your daydream, which I haven't even got around to fucking sliding yet, oh my god, these motherfuckers, so yes, of course, this is what you would do, if you were my fucking buffoon of a brother who wouldn't even listen to me on this, no he wouldn't even get to this, he wasn't even, he wasn't even receptive enough to get to this point, there you go, yes, of course, it's easy, it's easy to start consulting, of course you could be doing that, fucking set up a free community and just go hey, anyone interested in learning about fucking Bitcoin and make it for new fathers, that's it, that's what he has to do, instead what is it, this is like too long didn't read Bitcoin, TLDR Bitcoin, you know who the fuck knows what that is, you keep, check out TLDR Bitcoin, check that out and you go, you look at it, you go this is fucking insane, no one's ever gonna hit him up through this, I tried to tell this guy this, I tried, I've, oh no, I try, you directly, that's never gonna fucking work, never, ever, no fucking, I'll just keep posting bitcoins rising and then I'll go hey, too long didn't read Bitcoin, you go on his website, you don't even know what the fuck he's talking about, on the website, so this is what you should do, these are what it's to live by, this is genius, oh my god I'm getting hungry, I want that sushi now, so this is what he should do, you go this fuck's never gonna listen to me, this is the other thing that annoyed me, these fuck's will do the opposite or what I say, out of pure spite, I had a guy who I earmarked him, no I didn't earmark him, I didn't, that was another one I told him, I earmarked him, no he fell into my fucking lap, I was like you know what, he's in my fucking orbit, maybe I'll will him to great, I was like maybe I'll will him to greatness, maybe I'll do that for fucking fun for the love of the game, maybe I'll do that, and he would do the complete opposite or what I said out of pure fucking spite and then finally I realized the genius that I am, that all I have to do is go you know what, you're right, I am a goof, you're right, you shouldn't listen to me, you're right, I'm gone, all I had to do was disappear from his life and then he would drive him fucking insane trying to get back into my life, that's all I had to do the whole time, it's right in front of my face, so I finally do that, I'm like oh my god this guy is gonna hit me up fucking, when I haven't posted it in a week he'll get the fucking, he'll fucking withdraw from me and my genius, because that's how genius my fucking YouTube videos, sorry, I'm getting sick of my fucking bug myself up, you know what, no I'm not, no I'm not, this isn't pumping myself up, these are the facts, they're facts, he's our facts, so this is what my brother should do, he's never gonna fucking do it because I told him to do it, but this is what he should do, he goes hey guys, join my free fucking community, are you a new parent, are you a new parent and do you not have fucking time to learn about fucking bitcoins because who on planet earth gives a fuck about Bitcoin except you, you fucking goofball, nobody does, no one cares about it, you're in such a fucking bubble, they need me to fucking reach in, slap you across the fucking face and go no one gives a fuck ever, they won't, they don't care, they don't give what they're on Instagram to fucking, well look at fucking tits or whatever, sorry, fucking baby photo, that's why I'm on his Instagram, I wanna see fucking photos of my fucking nephews, nephew in niece, that's what I'm on his Instagram for, he's fucking talking about Bitcoin and I skip, I go this guy's a fucking goof, that's what I think, this guy's a fucking goof, I get fucking, I get, I'm trying to explain how annoying this is, it's like who's this dream, like imagine fucking, I can't even remember, who are these fucking sexy bitches, people wanna fuck again, no, I don't wanna use this comparison, I'll use it, it's funny, so imagine, I think he did have a thing for Rihanna, I do think Rihanna is fucking a bride of Satan, I do think that, I do think that where she dressed up as a sexy nun once you go that's fucking weird, why are you dressing up as a sexy nun, so he's into Rihanna, so imagine Rihanna is there, she's waiting, she's waiting for him, she's got her pants down, she's waiting for him, she's dressed up as a nun, a sexy nun, what the fuck is wrong with the society, so imagine Rihanna, oh about to run out of battery, so imagine Rihanna is there, she's there, she's there, she's fucking wet, she's soaking wet, because I've been in an area, you fucking, you fucking bride of Satan, this is what I say to her, you fucking bride of Satan, fucking, I wouldn't fuck you if you were the last woman on earth, this is what I'm telling her, I go, I wouldn't fuck a woman I'm not married to, that gets her fucking wet, that I'm there going, I see through you, you fucking, what was your father, what was your fucking coke head, because he has a fucking daughter like you, that's why he's doing coke, he's going to board me, he's not a daughter like you, so she's getting fucking soaking wet, from this, she gets so good wet through this, I'm saying that, and I think my brother wanted to fuck her once, that was, fuck I'm so crass, I think my brother, you know, this fucking, this is my brother, he's had a concert, Rihanna looks at him once, and he's like, no, she wanted to fuck me, and you're like, this guy is insane, this guy's does not understand basic things on how the world fucking works, but no, Rihanna isn't going to fucking see you out on the stage and try to fuck you from that, she isn't, this is actually the perfect metaphor, genius again, it is, because this is what he's doing with his Bitcoin consulting, he's like, no, people are going to look at me, and they're going to want to fucking, they're going to want, they're going to want, they're going to view me, they're going to view me, they're going to go, I like the cut of this guy's jib, why don't, why don't I fucking take my pants down and fucking let him fuck me, or get me pregnant or whatever, this man, oh, it's feels about, he's doing that, he's going, what the fuck, fucking ask one human being, he doesn't even have to ask, that's the thing that was driving me fucking insane, what he has to do is set up a free community, go, it's new, it's a new platform, it's a new social media, so when fucking digital IDs come in, and I bet this fuck world sign up for the digital ID, I bet he will, I bet he'll bitch out there again, this fucking coward, sorry, he probably will, be like, oh no, I need to go on Facebook, I need to go on Instagram, you know what, I'll fucking get a digital ID, and then it will be me again, refusing again, being a hero again, and then I'll get this guy being like, what do you have to point to in real life, in real life, I'll go, my acts of fucking valor, my acts of valor, that's what I point to, I go, I'm fucking heroic, I'm a hero, check the scoreboard, I'm a hero, you know what, this is the thing, you start to pop yourself up, and then you go, no, I am a hero, I am, I am a hero, everyone else did bitch out except me, and I get these guys being like, what do you have to point to in real life, my fucking track record of being correct, correct, correct, everywhere, don't get me angry, all right, I, you know what, the 7% battery, I could go for hours and hours on this topic, I could, there's sushi upstairs, there's sushi upstairs, there is sushi upstairs, there is sushi upstairs, that's the thing that gets me, there is, what was my point, so me, I go, you know what, I don't want to fuck Rihanna, Rihanna, it's beneath me, fucking Rihanna is beneath me, that's how I view life, I go, it's beneath me, to have sex with Rihanna, I go, she's not worth the fucking cum, she's not worth the fucking energy, she doesn't, she doesn't deserve it, it's the other thing, I guess, she doesn't deserve it, she doesn't deserve me, she doesn't deserve me, yes, I will whisper in a ear, yes, I will tap into her fucking weird childhood shit, yes, I will do that, yes, I will get soaking wet, then I'll leave, I'll leave, I'll leave, and I'll leave, I'll leave the room, I'll leave there in the bedroom, I'll go out, if I'm a brother at the party, we're at a party, this makes more sense, we're at a fucking Diddy party, right, we're at a Diddy party, I don't check that out at all, what's up with that, we're at a Diddy party, I go, hey man, all you have to do is walk into that room, we're out of the soaking wet, just say your daddy Jolie, big doll, just say, hey, Jolie said I had permission to fuck you, just say that, as you go, he said, yeah, just go over say, I'd go, give him the exact words to say, he'd go over, go, yeah, Jol said, he'd never fuck you, if you're the last woman on earth, he said that, and I would go to fucking wet to hear that, he said, if you're the last woman on earth, he wouldn't fuck you, because you're beneath him, because you know, what the fucking come, because you're a bride of Satan, and he only likes good girls, and you're a bad girl, were you, man, I love the podcast, it's so good to be back on the podcast, so yeah, Jol said that, he said that, but he said, maybe, he thought about it, he was like, maybe one day, maybe it proved you're a good girl though, so he said, I'm, he said, I'm, I'm like his proxy cock, this is what he said, yeah, this is what he said, he was like, you know, how fucking back in the old days kings would have a buffoon taste their food, make sure it isn't poison, so I'm, I'm not for him with women, so like, he wants me, this is how it works, if you ever want to fuck Joel, what am I talking about, if you ever, no, I'm gonna keep going with this, if you ever want Joel's to come inside of you, he gets me, I'm like a stunt cock, like the little stunt cock he tests, little bad girls out with, where he's like, all right, he didn't fuck my fucking brother, didn't die, maybe, maybe I'll fuck her one then, all right, so that's all he would have to say, do I just go, not even that, just go, big dog Joel, and she'd, she'd pass out all of the rest from context, just go, jolly said, I'm good to fuck, that is all he would need to say, that is all he would need to do, what was my point again, oh my point again was, all he would need to do, set up a free community, go, hey guys, join my free community, if you're a new fucking father, and you don't, you're interested in learning about fucking crypto, not even Bitcoin, just crypto, crypto, and then you deliver the jam of fuck everything but Bitcoin, because he's got no fucking idea how to talk to a human being who doesn't give one solitary fuck about Bitcoin which is 99.9% of the population, I don't understand, this guy is so, but theory, it's like, hey, I enjoy the polar's dead conspiracy, actually I told this guy that, I was like, I almost went into the polar's dead conspiracy, he didn't even fucking care, he didn't even fucking care, I wouldn't even go into it, he's like, I don't even fucking care, and I go, no, this is social engineering, this is how you're being socially engineered, and like, the poor cotton is just the example one, the Beatles are just like, the fun, it's just the fun one, where you go, yes, the whole world is a stage, yes, you were being socially engineered, yes, Bitcoin was probably set up by DARPA, yes, of course that, of course I, of course I looked at it, looked at it, gave it five seconds of thought and went, nah, it's fake, of course I did that, but I still help a guy set up his fake thing, of course I was able to do that, go, no, uh, no, of course, of course the CIA was there from the beginning, of course they were, they were the beginning of everything, they created the best way to lead the opposition is to control them, of course I can see through that, because I found that out with the Beatles, I found out with the Beatles, it blew my fucking mind, we go, even the fucking Beatles, even the fucking Beatles are put on, don't you find that, your world you change is, and you go, everyone else is a fucking moron except me, and then you try to tell your brother this, you try, and he goes, I don't fucking care, I don't fucking believe in you, what you think is important sucks, it sucks, you haven't got a cool view, you haven't got, what the fuck does this guy even have, you haven't got debt, I do have debt, but you haven't got as much debt as me, so you suck, you haven't got debt, Bitcoin, you suck, and I know this guy doesn't believe in me, because one, I showed him how fake John Lennon's Merry Christmas, what the fuck is that song again? Happy Christmas, war is over, I was like buddy, that song, that song, the genius of John Lennon is a fucking goof on you, I'm genius, I'm the genius, I am the innovator, I fucking take my cock out and shit out, I take my cock out shit, I would fucking, now I'm gonna tell myself, again, that's the thing, John Lennon is a cool guy, but it's a put on, 99.9% of it was him being fucking everyone else, the social proof, that's how they ran it, that's why people think the Beatles are geniuses, because they fucking got newspaper men to write about it being like, well what a genius this guy is, the case point of that is in his life, what's that song again, in my life, where you look at fucking John Lennon's actual contributions to that song and here you go, this guy's a fucking buffoon, read in his own right, you go, this guy's a buffoon, oh no, actually here you go, he's cool, but he wasn't put on, like he did have talent, did they put gasoline on it, 99.9% of it was social proof, Beatles mania was fucking fake, do you think women were at concerts fucking orgasming over those fucking ugly fucks, do you actually believe that or what do they call them, agent provocative, see it's your fucking conspiracy, you're like no, it was fake, women, well they had, oh you go, this is social proof 101, where you'd get astroturfed and real like they were astroturfing in real life, they get one fucking woman to be like let's pretend the fucking John Lennon's attractive, let's do that and they're like how can we actually pretend that he's fucking hideous, maybe we'll pretend George Harrison's attractive and you go no they're all not that, they're like average looking guys, they're not ugly, with an average of Paul McCartney is sexy, I will, yeah he's got a dump truck on him, he is the only one where you're like nah he's pretty fucking sexy, but then you fucking delve into the pool as dead conspiracy and you go it's fucking plastic sir, I'm not even gonna say it, I'm not even gonna say it because it is fun but it is also like it was weird, oh my god, I'm on 6% battery, you go this is an hour and a half, I love the podcast man, I do, I love it, that is my new area of expertise, fuck YouTube, yeah this is my new era, so this is what my fucking brother would do, if he ever wanted to pull this fucking finger out and actually start charging people money, for his very specialist knowledge on Bitcoin, he would start a free community on the school, maybe use my affiliate code and no he probably won't do that, he'd be like nah, he's like you know what, he'll do the complete opposite, this is what he should do, so I'll say it, start a free community on fucking school, start a free community, do it and go don't call it too long, didn't read Bitcoin, that's dumb, that's a dumb name because who the fuck even knows what TLDR means, you've got to be sort of internet savvy to understand that, who the fuck is he targeting, that was the whole thing that confused me, it was like who the fuck is he, who the fuck is his avatar, and go he never even thought about it, he's just like Bitcoin, Bitcoin is that good, where people will see that I've talked about, this is how insane this guy is, he's like Bitcoin is that good, that people will see that I have mentioned Bitcoin and they will beg me, they will fucking beg me to take their money, and then I go he, I'm in the situation where I was like can this guy pay for me to go to Sydney, so that is the thing where he's like this guy doesn't even have any fucking money, what's he talking about, I go what are you talking, the fucking dollar is crashing, what are you talking about, I'm building my foundation on solid rock, I am, everything else is meaningless, it doesn't look like I'm a bit of a loser at the level, like hey buddy, can you please pay for me to go to wherever the fuck, that does happen, I do understand that, here you go, this guy doesn't even fucking believe in me, he doesn't, he said it, he said it, he did, he alluded to it, he said yeah, maybe, I don't know, you haven't got a fucking, what's your life, I need to look at your life before I can fucking value your opinion, my own fucking brother, who yes, you could actually just look at the events where you go this guy, he is a fucking hero, maybe you could do that, I probably forgot about it, but yes I did pull a fucking dad off mum, I did do that, I don't think anyone actually saw that, that's the game I saw that, yes I, yes that's the cut of my jib, I was like yes I will pull my own fucking father of my mother, and yes there were three other siblings there to do it, yes and yes I was the youngest, yes I walked in like a fucking hero and I pulled them off her, yes that didn't happen, and yes I don't know if my brother ever had to do that, I probably didn't, and yes my other brother had drug dealers coming to our fucking house trying to collect money, yes I did walk out again, me, baby brother was like alright I'm getting fucking involved, I'm a fucking hero and yes my bad, yes this is too inside, and yes my other brother sat inside and was like this guy's drama, my own brother has drug dealers coming to his door, it's too much drama and yes my fucking mother slept through this, of course she was awake, she was like I'm not getting up and dealing with this, yes I was the one who was like I'll fucking deal with it, I'll go out there, I'll go out there, because I'm a fucking hero, yes this is obvious to me, but you know he can't remember, he can't remember this, maybe he forgets this, maybe he forgets it, he forgets it where you go no no no, I didn't get a fucking medal, I didn't get, no one else saw that, I didn't get a fucking medal from the fucking, I should have, I should have got a medal, but no no one was there to give me a fucking commendation on my heroicism, man no one was, I'm gonna go up to three percent back, you're so yes of course I did this for this guy, what am I talking about again, I love the positive self-talk, you're so yes of course I'm a hero, of course when the digital ID comes in I'll go, I'll laugh at it, I'll go, you fucking goofs make me, of course I'll do that, you fucking goofs, I'm divinely guided, I have got on my side, you fucking goofs, and of course you never even mentioned the fact that you've been, I think I did try to mention it to him, and I went he's not even gonna fucking care, that's what I thought about, I was like he's not even gonna fucking care what I've been going through for the last nine months, or eight months or whatever the fuck he's not even gonna fucking care, so why even waste his time with the actual real shit I've been going through, but I ain't fucking cosplaying, I ain't fucking cosplaying, I've got some real powerful forces taking their masks off and winking at me going yep, you see us, yep, you're a G, they can recognize it, even they recognize it, they go yep, oh this guy is a fucking genius, even my enemies see that, my fucking enemies, this is gonna sound so insane, yeah my enemies can recognize that, yes I have enemies, see that's what you can even tell, I couldn't even tell this to that guy, I go no I've actually got fucking real life enemies, yes I've got people trying to fucking ruin me in real life, no I'm no fucking cosplaying on fucking bitcoin watching things go tick up and down, yes I'm actually putting my skin on the line, yes I am the fucking man in the arena, yes I am, yes I am, yes it has negative consequences that affect my fucking ability to do things, yes of course, but I get this fucking guy going, you know what, I need to see fucking real thing was in real life, I go you fucking known me for how long I'm a fucking hero, I'm a fucking genius if you can't get it by now, good luck to your god bless, but this is what I do, I go hey I've set up a free community and instead of fucking whatever the fuck he does, like look at this graph, bitcoin, too long didn't read bitcoin, instead of that go hey, I've got this community for new parents who don't have the time and every time I was in one of these fucking situations which I'm sure he's in his entire life and people ask me what I do for a living, I go oh I help fucking new parents get into crypto, I do that, I do that, and I get fucking social proof fast, quick, quick, a guy going oh he helped me, I'd get that first because that's actually what fucking motivates people to do things, a social proof, so the reason why you wouldn't trust me in my opinion is because I have zero social proof to you despite the fact that you were so up close to me for how many fucking years, that was my social proof with this guy, so the fact that you're like oh I need, even I can listen to my first podcast which I've listened to about a thousand times, it's that good, it's that funny, it's that out there, even I need social proof with my own fucking brother, maybe the fuck's on the internet, need social proof, maybe they need more than looking at a fucking graph, this fucking guy in furious mail, sorry, where you just go what the fuck man, what the fuck, I could give it to him, the keys to the fucking kingdom, I could give it to him, he'd look at me, he'd go I don't believe in you, that's what he would say, he'd go yeah you have the kings to the kingdom, yep I've known you for however long, yeah you are a genius, yeah you are, but I don't believe in you, and he'd fucking sit down on the couch and do whatever the fuck actually I think he just has a full plate, maybe I'll send this to him, maybe I won't send it to him, maybe I won't, maybe I will, who knows, I'm not gonna send it to him, that's the thing actually I'm not, I'll put it on my fucking Facebook, so you can look at it like the rest of these, no shout out to my Facebook friends, that you're all great people, but I'll put on my fucking Facebook and maybe I'll look at it, maybe I won't, maybe I'll look at it, maybe I won't, who the fucking cat is there, although I don't want my Facebook friends to be like this guy keeps talking about how you just can't decide, you know what, if you've listened to this file, believe what you want to believe, okay, so I'd go hey, join my free community by help, I wouldn't even do that, I wouldn't even do that, you know what, he just needs to, basic one, step one is to get a fucking avatar who you're fucking serving, so yes, my YouTube channel did have an avatar that it was serving, it was one fucking guy, it turned out to be the wrong guy for, he was a bit like my brother in the respect that he didn't believe in me, whatever, this fucking guy doesn't believe in me, so yes, of course, I gave him every answer to all these problems, he wouldn't even fucking look at it, because he was like no, I like the attention, I like your aura, they like my energy, that's the thing, these fucks, they can't deny the energy, that's the thing, so I do like being around you for some reason, yes, it's because I've got a fucking aura around me, an aura, a hundred foot aura, that's what you enjoy about being around me, the aura, it's magical, it's spellbinding, it's uplifting, so yes, of course, you can recognize that being in my fucking orbit is good, of course, that's all unconscious, down to 5% battery, so better wrap this up, that's all unconscious, that's all subtle, subtle, actually I do remember a bunch, I used to pronounce subtle, subtle, subtle, so subtle, subtle, subtle, so maybe he's still got shit like that in his mind where he can't recognize that, yep, I could fucking get him a fucking consulting client within a fucking week, that's what I do, I go hey buddy, put your fucking stopwatch on, that's what I'd say, I'd say hey get your timer out and go all right, I'm getting my first fucking client within a week, do that, when I fucking do that, because I fucking told him to do it and he'd be like you haven't got anything to point to, you need social proof and I go yes, I do need social proof, I'll go all right, I didn't think my brother needed social proof on me, I didn't, I didn't think that, I thought it would be like all right, we have no proof, maybe my fucking brother will believe in me, I did think that, you are right, I do need social proof, you also need fucking social proof for your Bitcoin fucking fugazi, fucking circlejack, ah, these guys, man, these guys, man, they don't believe in you, Joel, they don't, which is fair enough, they don't believe in me, I recalibrated, I went nope, it doesn't believe in me, okay, nope, he doesn't believe in me, also, okay, nope, no one believes, it's like, yep, they don't believe in you, fair enough, I'll go out on the fucking street and get people to believe me, it'd be easier than getting my own fucking brother to believe in me, it would, that's what I realized, I went, I'll go out on the fucking street, I'll go to my fucking open mics, I'll go out, I'll go out to the people, they'll believe in me, because it'll be so fucking obvious to them, it will, it'll be so fucking obvious to them, I will, it will, I've welded it, I've welded it, no, I haven't, I haven't welded, God has welded it, I've just, I've got my own well out of it where you're going up, all right, they don't believe in you, so I'm going to go into full details of how easy his Bitcoin fucking consulting rank would be, it'd be so fucking easy, but it's so fucking beneath me that I was trying to do it as a favor to this guy, as a favor is gonna tell him how to do it, as a favor, because mine is don't quit your daydream, and I actually don't have the luxury of having a free community because I'm getting fucking harassed online, I did mention to that to him, I think I mentioned that to my own fucking brother, he's like yeah who cares, who cares, I've got kids, yeah you get and say Danic messages, who cares, I've got children, I don't give a fuck, what, what buddy is like yeah I don't care, yeah you can't buy a fucking coffee, this was like two years ago, this is where the resentment formed with my brother, I was like no he's not in my foxhole, that was actually not resentment where I just went no this guy is not in my foxhole, that's it, there you go he's not in my foxhole, good guy, wish him well, but he's not my foxhole, I'm visiting him, it's that weird time where the fucking government, I'm versing the fucking government, and this guy is the goal, he has the nerve to ask me what I can point to, it's me, it's me, a little brother Jolie and you know what, me versus the fucking government I live for, let's give that a fucking well, me versus the government, I'm like you know what, I'll do that because I'm a man of conviction, I'm a man who knows what's right and I will fucking go to that, this isn't even me pumping myself off anymore, this isn't even me trying to be funny, this is me going I would rather fucking die than fucking surrender, I was, it sounds weird, I want to live, let me be very clear, I want to live but I would rather fucking die then do what I don't think is right, that's me, I can point to things, no I'd rather fucking die and you know what, that's me, that's what I can point to in real life where you go, let's get in there, what can this guy point to in real life, my fucking actions, it's what I can point to but yes, who gave you the money to move, who gave you the money to move to Sydney, it was me, I believed in you there, I was like this guy is gonna make it in Sydney, I'll give him my fucking paycheck, whatever the fuck I did, but he's clearly forgot about immediately, immediately, you forgot about that, I went back and I reread my diary from the times he was moving to Sydney, I did that, I brought it up to him in the car and then he asked me about it, I was like it's too embarrassing for me to mention, I forgot where this fucking guy was spending his last night and Brisbane visiting his ex-girlfriend drunk and being a buffoon and I remember, it was like I kept the diary for 10 years, I'd flick to that page and I was like oh that was weird, I brought it up, and then when I remembered what it was, I was like I can't even, I can't bring that up because it's too fucking weird to talk about, so yes of course I believed in him, when he was moving to Sydney, I did, I gave him the money, I did, I think I gave him like 100 bucks, I blowed up in my mind with the years ago, I gave him 10,000 dollars to fucking buy a jacuzzi because I believed in him and this guy, what do I even want from this guy, oh I wanted to fucking work with him, that was my fucking crime, my own fucking brother, I was like maybe stopped sending me fucking memes that I don't think are funny and we'll fucking work together and we'll conquer the world because I, no one believes in me yet, maybe you'll believe in me, we'll believe in each other, we'll work it like a band, waste the fucking time, it was waste the fucking time because when the first time I ever tried to collaborate with this fucking bitcoin was maybe four years ago, three years ago, shame with this motherfucker and he still hasn't done a fucking thing on his bitcoin consulting, he hasn't, he hasn't, he's cosplaying, he's fucking cosplaying, it's pathetic to what's your own brother, be a wannabe, it's what it is, a wannabe consultant, discuss me, disgusting, a wannabe, take a fucking action, no, a put a fucking website out, a go hey, bitcoin website, maybe you'll fucking email me, you'll fucking, it's literally the equivalent in terms of marketing, yes I didn't do marketing, that was my living for fucking two years marketing, which is hey, ask people, if you have a product, ask people, that was my fucking living, that was my fucking living, hey, ask people, yes I was the top person there, I was, I was the top person in a fucking Brisbane at my fucking job, I was, no one even knows that, I did mention that to people I think they forgot, yes I was the best, I was the big dog there also, I was, I was, I was, and yes I did get fired, I think my brother forgot I got fired, I was like what, he didn't even listen, he didn't even listen to the end of my podcast, he didn't, where I got genius and I revealed I was fired, he didn't, or he forgot about it, yes I'm on 3% battery, yes it's been fucking two hours, he didn't, he didn't believe in me, yes the podcast is fun, what, what's the vibe, what's the vibe, what's the vibe, anything out of my fucking mouth, that is a word to live by, all right, all right, all righty then, I'm gonna enjoy listening back to this, oh yeah the whole point of this was I'm on a media deprivation, I can only eat what I kill in terms of entertainment so I had to get back into my fucking podcast because I needed to hear some genius, hear some genius, I still do think I should talk, talk, is there a point I'm missing, no that's it, it is fun to talk though, all right, oh no this is a fuck, they don't believe in you Joel, all right, I believed in them though, that was the thing that broke my heart, I believed in these fucks, yes of course I believe in my real life, of course I did, yes of course I believed in 2020, of course I did, yes of course I will be the first person to be if I believed in my fucking friend, what's that guy's name, I believe in them all, they would only listen to me, that's the thing where you go, yes you could have everything you want, everything you ever designed in life, you could have that if you want but you got a fucking lesson to me, that's it, I get, where's the, where does the persona end, where does the positive self-talk end, and where does the real me begin, no these are my actual thoughts, I go yes I am a genius, yes I am a hero, yes I have got, sorry I'm in front of the mirror again, yes I have got it all worked out, I have, yes I have, no I don't have it all worked out but yes I have, you know what, that sushi is really fucking, you know I do have one person I'm planning on, I have to believe in me, who's buying me sushi, and also my other brother did that also, he bought me sushi, he's a great guy also, they're all great guys but they do not believe in me, that's their mortals, I cannot tolerate that, I cannot forgive that, of course I don't want to fucking spend time with you when I go this fuck doesn't even fucking believe in me, you need social proof, these fucks, they need social proof, they need social proof, when said 99.9% of what society holds dear and nearest trivia, read up fucking book on stoicism, read Makasil, really a sweet the greatest thing there's of all time, new fucking cares, it's all trivia, the real genius is, silence, bye!