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For hers.com/crapins, hers weight loss is not available everywhere, compounded products are not FDA approved or verified for safety, effectiveness, or quality, prescription required a restriction supply. Hello, and welcome to Watch What Crap Inz, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Metalker, and joining me fresh in the new year in 2025, Mr. Ronnie Karam. Hi, Ronnie. How are you? Hello, Ben. How are you? Oh, wonderful. How was your breaky break? You have a nice time. Amazing. Can't believe it's ending. Fantastic. Beautiful. But you know, glad to be back talking about the broves. How about you? After 2025, what are you going to do? What's your goal? Well, my goal is to be as healthy as possible while we go on tour. I know that sounds like I'm actually just finding a way to promote our tour, but it's actually really, it's a big concern. I'm really trying to be healthy over the next four months. So I'm really looking forward to that, and I'm also looking forward to it. We had a really fun bonus episode, by the way. I will show this that on Patreon right before we left for break, we did a bonus episode. What we talked about, what we want to happen in the new year and we look back on the past year. It was actually a really lovely episode. So please go and listen to that. That's at patreon.com/wattracrapins. And this is also a video, I see I am automatically shilling no matter what, but this is also Crap is on demand. You should come watch it as well. And the truth is we are going on tour and the tickets are at wattracrapins.com. To that end, by the way, the crappies, now we are officially less than a month away from the crappies, which is scary as fuck. But guess what? The first round voting is going to open up on Monday. So this is your warning, your alert. Be ready. Voting for round one will be on Monday, we'll have the link up on our social media, we'll have it on our website, all that good stuff. We're currently compiling the categories, we thank you for everyone who submitted nominations and ideas and suggestions, it's so fun to go through it, go through memory lane, they can't wait to have a final ballot, but really looking forward to that. So that's that. And what about you, Ronnie? What is your goal for 2025? To stay hot. Yeah. All right. So here we go. Let's party below deck, selling, ton, ton, ton, ton, ton. Monsters. It was really nice to start the new year. So actually, this episode came on before the new year started, technically, but we're not regamping it till the new year, but it's our first recap of the new year. And Bueller's here. Hi, Bueller. Welcome. Hi, Bueller. Look, you just hopped up. Recap of the new year, Bueller. Wow. Bueller's first appearance of 2025. By the way, I just want to also mention to people while Bueller's here that Ronnie was very lovely. Now you're leaving. I don't like all the attention. He was like, I'm out of here. I just want to say I did get to finally see Ronnie's renovated home, and it is gorgeous and beautiful. And congratulations, Ronnie. Thank you, Ben. A lot of labor of love. It is stunning. You have such an eye. And if you are to flip a house ever, like please, whoever's listening, I know there are people that are listening, give this man a TV show because Ronnie did a great job and he deserves his own HGTV show. I will be the jacks to your Brittany on this one. I am going to show for an HGTV show for you because it was beautiful. The choices for furniture, the color palette, the materials. You just did a wonderful job, Ronnie. I'm really proud of you. Ben, thank you so much. Yeah, thank you. No, it's great. I love the Christmas home. We had a Christmas party over there. It was just so nice. Oh, God. I had so much fun. Okay, memories. Good. Okay. Memories. Anyway, that was last year. That was last year. First thing of the new year. It was below deck and to have monster guests just felt so good. Just to have unpleasable people, just jackass people who acted like they're the fanciest people in the world, but obviously don't know what they're fucking talking about, which is great. You know, like complaining about the taste of an aperol spritz as if they could do anything about that. It's literally. Aperol. Oh my gosh. Everything. It's not too much interpretation. You know what I mean? Yeah. Did I just ignorant stupid fucking awful nasty people and it was nice, you know, because I feel like sometimes people try and fake it for this show and it's nice to just have shitty people. Sometimes I some normally I hate it, but sometimes I like what shitty people are like, well, we're shitty. And that's just the way it is. We like being shitty. We're going to stay shitty. So stay shitty, shitty people. What a great start to the new year. But there's always this element of dissatisfaction I have across all below deck shows, which is that when you do have shitty how shitty guests on the boat and then the show airs and then the show always roasts them because the crew roasts them, the internet roasts them. And like I always want to like I want them to be accountable or I want to like put a microphone in their face be like, how do you answer for this now that you've seen it? What do you say? And we never get that with the guests. They just go back off to obscurity unless they're like, Jill's Aaron, but I want to I want these people to say like, Oh, wow, we saw us. We saw ourselves on screen and we were we were terrible. Like I want to know what they thought seeing themselves. I have often followed up with people on the show where I go on Instagram, I find their accounts because I love to read America just reading these people for filth, you know, and they do. Like that Bobby Rose or what was that chick? Not Bobby Rose. Oh, Erica Rose and Erica Rose for horde mother. Yeah. Those awful monster trash people, they were read for filth and I loved reading that. And of course, it was all editing's fault and it was all the staff. So that's the big spoiler is that it's still never their fault. You know, it's always editing's fault always every single time. I've never read one that's like, wow, we really sucked. You know, yeah. Well, this episode definitely have me feeling a certain sort of way because it was one of those episodes where I texted Ronnie. I think I texted you and I was like, this episode's make me feel a lot of things. Now, I've forgotten almost all of it because it was last year guys. But as we go through it, I'm sure like things will be drugged up and I will, I will have rage anew. But I was feeling things. I was having a lot. I know. Oh my God. I just had a, I had a Vietnam flashback into what made me so mad actually and I will get to it. I will get to it everyone. We're going to put a pin in that. That's a preview. Just wait. Just wait for about 75 to 80% through this way through our recap and my anger will come out. Yeah. Well, this show is hard to even get that angry about because this is the lowest rent of all the below decks. The boats falling apart. There's always shit falling all over. I mean, I know they're tilting, but they still don't have a cabinet door as it can close. People come spill drinks on you. I mean, that's just how the show is. They serve you shitty food half the time. They're sperm all over everything. Yeah. You know, there's, they fuck all over the boat. There's, it's just a nasty, skeevy, Gary's always there driving you. I mean, it's just one of the skeevier, skeevier shows. So there's an element of me that no matter how bad the guests are, I'm always kind of on their side. Because I'm like, yeah, let's be honest, they're probably right. You know what I mean? Like these guests were complaining about every drink, but then I was like, but these drinks probably do suck. And they complained about the food. And I'm like, but food probably did suck. Like the things they complained about, they weren't great, but they might have had a point. But also, but also you're going on a charter for like a very reduced cost. We know this. And it's a, it's a brought, it's like on TV. Like I know if I want to have a delicious meal, I'm not going to go to Gordon Ramsay's Hell's Kitchen. I'm going to go to a proper restaurant. I'm not going to eat on the sound stage. So like yes, they are entitled to be disappointed by shitty service 100%. And I know that if I were on the boat, I probably would be a monster. I'd be edited to be a monster. But that being said, like, also, you know what you got yourself into. Yeah. Also, it's also the one day charter, you know what I mean? Because I already have zero respect for one day charter. It's like, you're already getting a bargain, but you need this much of a bargain. Like really, they're like, I'll give you five dollars and then we'll just come be monsters on your book. And they're just like, I don't understand what this food is or, you know, whatever it may be for the one day charter, but they're never good and they're always horrible people. And it's like, you are the ultimate NASCAR people. Can you please stop pretending actually our NASCAR people rich, but you know what I mean? They're just like, low at the low at sorry, I'm defending all the NASCAR people, but you know what I mean? When NASCAR comes to town and suddenly there's flags you don't understand on cars and like people tailgating you and getting faggot out their window, you know how it is. That's exactly what these people are, you know, not these in particular. I just mean lower rent people in general, though I just mean when they charter people. I'm not even going to say lower rent anymore. I'm just going to say those are when they charter people. I think you're, I love this. I think you're so right. I feel like we've never really have articulated that like when, when, when it says one, one day charter, I'm always like, cheap like Walmart. There's a pack, please pack up your bindle and leave. It's always say the one day charters are my favorite because I always see my own clothes represented on screen. It's like, Oh my God, finally people who were old Navy are here, but also like, what's the point? Like, you're like, it's a little bit of it's effort to get onto a yacht and to do all that stuff. I just feel like one day, I mean, you're just, it's like, I just do two nights. Like you're not going to, you know, what if the first day you're so sad and built in the sun? It's just sad. It's sad. All right. Um, here we go. Oh wait, but, but we do have something here. There's something I do. I don't remember if we talked about this last time. I think we speculated it, but we heard from an old queen in a bar, um, previously, previously on blue deck sailing yacht, Gary decides he isn't going to be drinking for the rest of this season, which lasts all of about half an episode. We were speculating on the last episode when Gary suddenly decided that he wants to be sober. We thought like nothing that happened on camera seemed so crazy or above the beyond the pale of what he normally does that he decides to finally become sober. And as we all know, leading into the sea season, we, we've read that, and we know that there's like someone on the staff of below deck, you know, I think was made allegations or maybe press charges or something like that about Gary. I think it was coming on to her inappropriate yada yada. We know it's terrible. And so we were wondering if maybe this happened, like, and this is what really caused them to be sober. And then we heard from an old queen in the bar who said that basically, um, that like, I think the timing of it actually did work out and that when they shoot below deck, there's like forced time, like the cast has to have time to like they're put into sequester every few days and they're put into hotel rooms. They don't talk to anyone else. And that's when this that's when this incident happened. So it would make sense that like during a blackout period, no pun intended that Gary like was in his hotel room and this is when this all happened and it comes back to shoot. And so for us, we don't see on camera, we don't see anything. But what is it's something that happened off camera off, like beyond the shooting schedule in between charters. So what did old queen, I have the, I have an article up if you want deets. So this is from a screen round Gary basically was accused by season four makeup artist. Well, we'll hold her name here because why, why put her through that, but makeup artist of sexual misconduct stemming from an incident that allegedly occurred during filming in the summer of 2022 was tasked with escorting cast members to and from their rooms for production in between interview segments. She also kept the crew isolated before and after the interviews. Samantha claimed, well, there we go. Okay, I can't read her name. Samantha claimed that she brought a view boost of Gary back to his hotel room, following filming for a confessional interview. Gary had been in isolation after a positive COVID-19 diagnosis, kept him from joining the crew. And yeah, so this is where he showed up late for that season. Remember, because everything else that was basically wrong, but maybe, okay, so 2022, obviously my this entire theory is well, no, because this aired in 2024, but it was filmed a long time before, because remember, this has been on the shelf for a long time. I think it was probably filmed in 2023, but it's possible that the this is it's possible that maybe the allegations surfaced during this, so I don't leave people hanging. So she stated that Gary was she was bringing him back to his room, and he was behaving radically and eventually grabbed her from behind and physically restrained her from leaving before he she was able to get away. She stated that production never limited Gary's alcohol consumption. And she worked on previous seasons, including season 10, where she accused bows and Ross of making inappropriate comments or inappropriate comments towards her. So that's the one article there and when did that article when when did this news break? This was November 4th 2020 notes updated November 4th, 2024. So this must have been a long time ago. So maybe I mean, so maybe the maybe the maybe when the news broke, Gary was like maybe reprimanded off camera, et cetera. So I will amend the theory, but I'm glad you clarified that because, you know, I'm not trying to pass long, you know, bad information, even though I blatantly just did. But you know, I mean, most of it is just stuff we read headlines about, you know what I mean? And it happened a long time ago. I thought the same thing. I was like something something and it might have still happened because we don't really know when this was filmed. That's the thing about below deck like, how are we supposed to know when this was filmed? Hmm. Yeah. Well, we'll keep an eye on it and we'll try to piece the other timeline as best we can. But anyway, the point was he must have done something really bad off camera to warrant him suddenly becoming a good little angel and deciding he's going to quit. And then he even did the PR thing of, look at me. I'm going to have a girlfriend now when he's trying to make good with Daisy and trial is just a day. Daisy, we have so much going for us and I believe in us long term, even if you don't. I'm just just this whole, it's just me dependable Gary, just waiting for you, you know, like girl, you have been such a fucking monster. And whenever a boy starts this good little boy act, it's because he's been caught doing something very, very bad. Exactly. I think I told the story before. It's like when I was in a trade and my parents were like, you know, it's time for you to go to sleep when you can't, you need to, you need to grow up a little bit. And I was like, no, I don't want to leave home. So I went and I washed all the dishes in the sink. I was like, I'm going to show him. I'm grown up. I can wash the dishes. And I was like, I'll fix it. That's basically what he's doing. He is washing his dishes, hoping that this will suddenly cause things to change rapidly and it won't. So we, we start the episode. Everyone is waking up after their crew night out and Daisy and Gary are sharing room and Daisy's like, saw did you have fun last night? And he's like, yes, I did have a one night, you know, as long as you get to get along with everyone, when everyone's drunk, bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep. I'm like, no shit. We, it's hard. Imagine we've been the ones having to watch you get wasted for four years now. How hard is it on us? Now you're only just getting barely a taste of it. And everyone getting drunk doesn't even compare to what everyone's had to deal with when you've gotten drunk, sir. So then we go to Danny who has just hooked up with Chase, you know, they've been banging in the bedroom all night, three times we find out later. And she's like, say that last time I was like, is somebody on this crew? I was told I can never happen again. But this time I'm hoping you'll say that he needs to dip in all the time. And I loved every second cause I did. So wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. And then Chase is like, wow, um, ho, ho, gee golly, woof, I've only been here three days. And last year I had to sleep in the fucking crew mess cause there were sex happening in my fucking cabin. Yeah. Here I am, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing. Just got lots of laid. Yeah. Personality still sucks though. By the way, I also want to mention, um, my favorite part of that little Gary Daisy scene was that after Gary is reflecting on how hard it was, you know, with everyone being drunk and how proud he is that he got through a night of not drinking. He literally says, you know, we should celebrate, have a drink off the boat, you and I. So congrats to Gary for celebrating your new sobriety by having toasting to a with a drink. Well, that's what they always say. I mean, listen, that's why you are supposed to celebrate in AA with chips because, you know, salty things are the best things to eat while you're drinking. Yeah. That's where the chip comes from. Exactly. You couldn't be like, hey, congratulations on three months sober. Here's a cocktail peanut. It's like, that's not fun. You know, we can't really commemorate that. Hey, I broke my teeth on this chip. Well, you're not supposed to eat that, sir. So Diana, so now Diana is like, how was your night? And then it was fun. And she's like, oh, I guess I have to do the fucking master again. Why do you have to clean up the sperm? You blew it. You stew it. That's what I say. Not stew it. That's disgusting. You, you unloaded. You should commode it. You unloaded it. You should commode it. If you got time to splooge, you got time to stew, do it. Okay. So the producer's like, hey, so Chase, what about Diana? And he's like, well, Diana is stunning, but I also think she's reserved, whereas Danny saw an opportunity and took it and I'm not upset about it. Is this the apprentice? Seriously. You know, because, and this just for anybody wondering what guys like this, easy. That's what guys like. They like it to be easy. Okay. That's all they want. Just make it. Whoever makes it is easier for this guy would fuck a Costco chicken sample is basically what he's saying. He is basically like when he gets an erection when he hears the Toyota jingle. We make it easy, easy for you, sir, you're not supposed to stick your penis in the pipe. All right, like they're putting his man in the tailpipe, like he's in Beverly Hills cop. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial. Hello, ladies and gerbs, boys and girls. The Grinch is back again to ruin your Christmas season with 'Tis the Grinch Holiday Podcast. 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He's like, "Did you have fun last night? We did indeed. It was so fun. Good times. Good, good time. Did you bleed?" Not that I remember. Ding. Did you go to a cave? No, I don't think. You always ask me if we go to a cave. We never go to a cave. I'm just holding out hope. So Chase is checking with Diana, but she's like, "Whatever." He's like trying to be like, "Hey, how you doing? How you doing? Had so much fun. Had good night with everybody." And she's like, "Uh-huh." And he's like, "Shut up. Okay. Shut up. You talkative little minks. All right. Not working on her." "Ooh, Chase. Did you have fun last night? Where did you disappear?" He's like, "Yeah, I had a great time. I don't remember, man. No, shut up. Come on. Spill the beans. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah." So Danny's going off to Diana about how hot he was and all this, you know, just rubbing it in. And because, you know, people like this also get off on the whole, like, "I won. I won the man. You didn't win the man. How does it feel if I'm not winning a man? How's it going? Folding those. Come rags. You like that? Yeah. I cause those. I cause those. There's more, I think, on the bragging about it to the girl who she beat than the guy that she beat off. She truly is someone who praddles on. It's not that she talks and talks or brags. She praddles. Like, she is the prototypical prattler. Like, she should be in some old Jane Austen movie coming in and be like, "Oh, I went with Mr. Willoughby to the dance and he just danced with me all night long. Isn't that amazing? I danced and danced and danced with Mr. Willoughby." It's like, "Oh, shut up. You prattler." God damn prattler. So Gary's telling Chase, "Listen, I thought you were going to hook up with Deanna. What was that? You were flirting all night." And he's like, "What? I'm not hooking up with anybody. I'm just doing the big job, man. Okay. Just doing the squeegee." And Deanna, back to Deanna, she's like, "Well, I do not enjoy this because you leave me alone for a good couple of hours and, you know, here I am having to work." And she's like, "Well, why doesn't everyone just make out? You know, you can always sleep in the master. There's been silly about this. If you want to have sex with someone, have sex with someone. I mean, if there's someone to have sex with them, I'm having sex with them. Where are they? Where are they? Where are they? She can't have sex with anybody. You're there. You're reserving it. You're the first in line. It's a fucking hurt rental. Every goddamn day that they own, maybe, anybody else supposed to drive a decent car." I know. You're making everyone else go to Alamo. So Deanna's like, "Well, what do you want? She tells us, 'What do you want me to do?'" I mean, like, sit back and, like, watch you stare at him from the corner of the cream mess table for the rest of the season. And maybe he'll come hook up with you, like, "No, excuse me. I was a cheerleader. I had 10,000 men staring at me. I'm going to take my short." Here's what she wants you to do. Not take every cookie off the plate. You know what I mean? Like, leave some for the rest of the people. Just because a cookie plate is there doesn't mean they're all for you. It's not all for you, cookie stealer. Share and share alike. When you tell it, it's just Christmas. You wake up and those cookies are gone, and I'm like, "That fat bastard," you know? And I'm really going on my own journey and trying not to body shame people, but I leave a whole plate of cookies out there. I wake up, they're gone, and you just, like, hear a ho, ho, ho, ho yourself, and I just fix that roof. You fat motherfucker. Get the hell off my roof. These cookies were not for you. Not to not say you could come in this chimney. There are no children here. I don't even believe in you. I'm calling Krampus. So, Danny is like, "Gary's sick and hot. You can have Gary as if, oh, thanks for giving Diana your literal sloppy seconds. Okay? Thanks for offering up." There was a season of Survivor where this one girl, I think her name was Poppy or something, she went off on a reward, and they gave her a mint, and she came back and she was sucking the mint, and everyone was staring at her, and they were so angry, and she was like, "Oh, I'm sorry." And she took it out of her mouth and offered it to someone like, "Do you want it?" And it was just like, "Shut the fuck up." Thank you for offering your Gary mint to Diana. Oh, yeah. I mean, you've already given whatever Gary gave you to chase, so I guess, you know, at least you're being fair with it, wrong kind of sharing. And Diana's like, "No, thanks. I don't do love triangles. Now, regular triangles, I will play them with putnam asks. Would you like to hear me play Moon River?" "Bing, bing, bing, all right, stop it!" You know, I thought that was a little inconsiderate because you said you were going to play Moon River on the triangle, but instead you just sort of accompanied it? I don't think that's fair. Okay, so Diana's like, "That girl moves fast." And I expected her to jump on Chase, but it still sucks, you know. So she picks up the talent. She's like, "I hope this doesn't have penis things. Throw it on her face and make her do it." She's like, "What? No, that's my table. It doesn't have penis stains on it." All right, everyone, Daisy Glenn and Chloe, it's time for a preference sheet meeting in the cave. That's what I'm going to crew mass now. God, I love it in here. Okay, this is a quick overnight charter. Chee bosses. Okay, Daisy, thank you. Gillian is an operations specialist in healthcare and Sherry is a celebrity hairstylist. Gillian and Sherry plan to enjoy fun in the sun and great cuisine alongside their friends. Okay, so one of you charges too much for my blood work and the other one does terrible tracks on housewives. Okay, I already hate both of you. One is a professional hanger on and the other is fleecing America. So Gary is like, "Well, the kids look like you enjoy all of the what you choose. This boat has to offer and hope they can catch, catch, catch, catch some wind for an amazing song. We're having a meeting." Chase, get your penis out of the triangle. You're there. It was easy, man. Okay, so Chloe just reads seven courses. Okay, so we already know these guests are morons because who asked for that? Seven. Okay. It's not a thing. Oh, no, I don't, if you're, okay, if you're going to find courses, five courses is a lot. Come on. Five is, is your traditional right? Well, five is your traditional for Captain Sandy. Remember she told Rachel, "Hey, hey, five courses, just five courses." You know, a seven course meal is fine for fine dining, and we're going to circle back to this because this is where my rage is going to come into, but I'm going to let my rage out at an appropriate time. But seven course meal is appropriate. What I do think is strange, though, is that pairing with the drinks they all learn to mix. They want to do a mixology course. I think mixing with, with mixology is a strange, like that's a strange request. So they want to do a mixology class, and then they want to do a seven course meal to pair with their drinks that they're going to make. I don't know. That doesn't sound very fine dining-y and also whether it's fine dining-y or not. It just doesn't sound like a good idea. Well, it sounds like Gary Wade, and it sounds like just alcoholism, right? It's like eight drinks, seven drinks. Okay. So I know that seven course meals are heard of. I shouldn't say they're morons, but you automatically know they're jerks because when you come on a one-night charter and you're just like, make us seven courses, it's like people who, I don't know. It's like, I'm going to get this. I'm going to get everything that I can fucking get. You know, it's like my friend who goes to the front desk and asks for the slippers and the toothpaste and the towels, and then she's taking home the, you know, so unplug the phone, the hotel phone and put it in her bag on the way out. It's like, this is my one night at a hotel, and I'm getting every free thing I can. Yeah, I feel like you've been there before, you know? Well, I'll also, like, if it's your one night on the yacht, I kind of feel like I want to spend more time, like, experiencing the yacht rather than being, like, stuck at a table, you know? Like, if I'm going to do a seven-course meal, I'm going to do the seven courses at a proper restaurant, maybe not, like, on a boat that sideways. Well, now here's another thing. Also, I'm having to lube up the side of my lips because, like, got up for the new year, I'm going on a stronger retinol, you know, which is, like, stuff old people use on their face. For those of you who are, like, what is retinol? It's like a face cream that kills a layer of your skin to reproduce skin more quickly for when you're old. So anyway, I had it on my hands, and then after that, I put on argon oil on my face, and I was putting the argon oil on, and I was like, "Oh, I should just put some on my lips, because I love argon oil." Well, I had the fucking retinol on my hands, so now my lips are falling off, basically. So if my lips fall off during this recap, it's because I did it to myself with face creams. Okay, back to the show, so also, I don't, to stand up for the guest real quick, I don't think they specifically said they need to have seven drinks in their seven course meal. They just said they wanted the drinks they learned to be paired well. You could do a mojito and pair that with lots of different things with, like, coconut or something that could go with this other thing, you know? Maybe the first three courses go with one drink. That's all assuming that when you request to learn how to make a mojito, you also know what a mojito is and like a mojito, but we'll get to that in the moment. So Daisy is like, "Alright, let's just tell me our manual and I'll pick the cocktails and go with it." He's like, "Okay, beautiful strategy." Well, the trend in where your requests are pretty straightforward, they seem like a fun group. So of course, it's like the guest specifically requested seven course meals, not six, not eleven, not four, not two, seven, thank you, thank you, Chloe. Keep talking. Hey, make this monologue longer. Yeah. He's like, "Well, my goal is to show kids a broad range of culinary skills, highlights or something from locals even in process." It's like, yeah, you're going to cook seven meals, seven courses, we get it, we understand what that means. Not three. Not highlight things, not my team. He's like, "I don't want to highlight my skills, I'm going to microwave everything." So they, everyone does their tasks and they get ready to go off on the boat for, you know, and everything. And so Garrett's like, "Daisybee, do you want to go get to that drink now?" Which I'm like, "Wow, you're really eager to get that drink to celebrate your non-drinking, right?" I'll be ready for the drink. I'm doing really well my spade here, I'm ready for the drink now, Daisy. So Danny's like, "Uh oh, is this a diet, is this a diet?" And he's like, "Well, having Daisybee supportive of me, not drinking, is a good feeling for me because then I know she's going to be there for me at my worst when I'm drunk because she has been there and also she'll be there for me at my best when I'm sober, which will never, ever happen. But working together, living together, living together, having these ups and downs, children running all around, snot coming after them, Daisy, you only get me from a fire escape in the middle of a very poor neighborhood to come inside and leave my boys." God, that vision is just still so strong to me. Daisy just hanging off the fire escape with the cigarette tingling out of her mouth and her ponytail kind of half undone and her makeup smeared down her face while dirty children run all around her, "Gary, where did you get her off the pier before you was at? Can't people say ironing porn, that's not a playground? I told you." Well now one of them's lost their face. Get up here, you're fucking good for nothing. One of the low points of my Christmas vacation was that for whatever reason Dom and I put look who's talking on, it was on TV as we watched part of it. First of all, it's not a good movie. Second of all, there is a scene where Kirstie Allie has a vision of what life would be like if she got with John Travolta and it's basically, it was like literally everything you just described. It was like her and curlers, John Travolta coming in with a pot belly and the kids throwing food around the kitchen and she has a cigarette out of her mouth. Did you pick up the milk and that's what Daisy and Gary would be. They would be a look who's talking fantasy. Yeah just that nightmare trash couple. It's usually the homecoming queen and the football quarterback from high school who just become trash as they get older and it's just gross. So Kirstie Allie, isn't that, wasn't Roseanne also in that? I think Roseanne was on Twitter. I think that Roseanne was a voice of one of the babies in the sequel. I'm a sequel, okay. Look who's talking to you. Look who's talking as well. Yeah, it was a terrible, it was terrible. It was like actually so much worse than I ever remembered it. And then when I saw Amy Heckerling directed it, I was like Amy Heckerling. I thought it was gonna be some random like old guy and it was Amy Heckerling so who knows. So think about that Amy Heckerling. If you're listening, you did bad work. The title of Ben's movie about that day, Heckerling, Heckerling, look who's talking. How about we call it look who's directing? Look who's Heckerling. So they leave and Daisy's just like where am I going Gary? It's like just to the corner. So they do and he's trying to hold her hand and stuff. And she's like what are we going for a drink for Gary? He's like ooh for us for the season. It's the season. And she's like well are you not going to drink for the rest of the season Gary? And he's like I didn't know maybe I'll have a glass to find tonight. Well, that's over. Daisy, why did you give me this slow pizza? Oh that's to represent the wedge of the chip that you achieved in your eight hours of sobriety. Not spent without. So then meanwhile, Danny is she's like oh my god, Chase is asleep. My love is asleep. Let's go wake him up. It'll be hilarious. So they go and they wake up Chase and it's like funny antics. So we come back to Gary and Daisy. And this is where Gary is now trying to see himself as a mature person. And so he's like, you know, Daisy, well he tells us, you know, we're roomies. And then being besties to being best friends to moving on in all seriousness. What are you looking for in life Daisy? Or I guess he's telling Daisy this. And she's like, in life. Yeah, for the next couple of years, if you thought about, I don't know, settling down with a tall drunkard who likes to do terrible things other people and maybe blah blah blah blah blah. Well, I got stabilized and work a bit would be not I said. So, you know, I've I've wanted to check out the the dice and because frankly, they're supposed to be really great vacuums. But I've never wanted to spend the money. You know, I say leave work at work. That's the kind of thing I say. But it's got a big bowl on it. And I've got to tell you sounds good. Here I come next couple of years. Well, I want to build that relationship period in relationships require a lot of work. You know, fuck yeah, you go through the ups and the downs like us. We've been to a lot, a lot of shit that most married couples haven't been to. And seriously, it doesn't seem like it's going to any any time soon. And Daisy's like, she's already like, Oh God, is Gary trying to really make something happen now? Well, she's used to what Gary's done. She she knows what Gary does. She knows his cycle. Gary's in trouble. So Gary is trying to, you know, use her for PR and she's like, no, no, because I think I think Daisy likes Gary. I think she would if Gary was being sincere right now, I think Daisy would be like, fuck yeah, let's do this. But she knows he's not being sincere. And she knows that Gary just likes the idea of Daisy. She likes the idea of he he likes the idea of being in a relationship and like being the mature person he aspires to be. But I think he also is drawn to Daisy. I think he's not actually attracted to Daisy or wants to be in a relationship with Daisy. It's just that like she's the only one who when he's done some real bullshit, like she's just like still is like nice to him. And so he well, it's likely all love a waffle house because really at the end of the day, no matter how drunk we are, they at least let us come sit down until we fuck up again. You know what I mean? Yeah, exactly. Daisy, you're basically a waffle house. Congratulations. He's so much in this relationship. He's like, Well, could you see a relationship with me? She's like, gah, I mean, I'm just a sinful friend here. I mean, imagine I wasn't here. Someone asked you that could you see yourself in a relationship with Gary? And she's like, gah, you just like the idea of me. I mean, you need you need to be honest with yourself. You know, I think we both have a lot of work to do in ourselves. But I think I've been working on myself a lot more than you've been working on yourself. I mean, I think anyone's can work on themselves more than you've been working on yourself. That turtle over there on the beach has worked on itself more and it's dead is a dead turtle and it worked on itself more than you. Let me just say, as a person who doesn't really care about either one of you, truly, and I can I can say that with with heartfelt in a heartfelt way, neither one of you have worked on yourself. You're both exactly the same. Okay. Carry on. Carry on with your fake conversation. You are both exactly the goddamn same. What are you talking about? You say, what? I've grown up myself. And she's like, huh, I think that you can get into a relationship with anyone. I think you I think you need to really work on yourself because you're not going to have a health and relationship with anyone. He's like, yes, but don't you think it's good to find someone in life that you can work on yourself with someone that brings out the best in you like Hellmans? She's like, I don't even know what the Hellmans is, but you have to be in a secure relationship and you need to be with a secure person. And we're not secure people. I mean, look at me. I'm Daisy for crying out loud. Daisy. So like you're talking about somebody fixing your problems, and he's like, no, you can send me to stand to your problems to have someone come in and say, okay, look at it from this side. Isn't that what love is? No, you're you're you want to say the fucking role of paper towels to come in and clean up your mess. No, someone to hold my hand, someone to clean up my mess, someone to slap me in the face when I get too drunk in between charters. Being blah, blah, blah. Being blah, blah, blah, blah. Commercials, here comes one right now. So Gary's like, well, I think I've been too scared to commit because I don't want someone to put me in my pace because I'm selfish, but I knew it's what I need. Well, that's what the police are there for. You know, but he's like, no, it's someone like Daisy. And she's like, well, because of everything that happened last year and car, I didn't respect my relationship at all. And I kind of took a step back from our relationship. Actually, you hooked up with his best friend, which you have every right to do, not shaming you for that. But you hook up with his best friend, then still furthered with him the whole time, then they both treated you like total shit. And then you ghosted him until this season. Why are you acting like you took some step back because he didn't respect your relationship? You know, who else didn't respect you? Colin. And Colin ended up good boy, good boy clubbing it with this one the rest of the time. Yeah. Either way, I think that Gary is trash. And although I you're not really refuting that, but, you know, I'm not at all just she has an interesting way of amending history. But that said, he is trash and she's not trash. I would I hope the best for her. I don't I don't hope the worst for Gary. I just don't just like stay over there, you know, stay over there. Yeah. Well, I lost. I already did some serious growing up for our past. Also having a future. There's no fucking way, you know, and she goes, you know, I think we make each other laugh. We have similar interests, you know, like alcohol. Anyway, it's a good list. He's like, so you think there's a chance? Oh, right. Let's go. It was very lovely. Thank you. Now back to not drinking for two hours. So he did. Did he have the drink? He definitely drank wine because the producers did a close up on the wine to be like, look audience, he is in fact drinking wine. It's not something that looks like wine. It is wine. He is having wine right now to celebrate his sobriety. Okay. Okay. So then now, Deanna and Danny are still doing their flirt thing with Chase. And it's annoying, annoying. So then, of course, is talking to Keith and, of course, like, sell as your attention shifted at all. What do you mean? Well, like, obviously, you were getting along with Daisy pretty good. So how do you feel about that? Like, is it changing your vibe that she's got with Gary? And he's like, I don't know, really. You know, in this morning, I felt like a piece of white bread. And then I found out about that and I felt slightly toasted. And I'm just sitting here, slowly getting harder and harder, waiting for someone to take a but nibble out of me really before I'm ready to be thrown in the bin. Does that make any sense? Someone to put me in the toaster, someone to spread some butter on me, someone to enjoy me for breakfast, come have a little bite. I'll always be there being a piece of toast, being a carb. So, Gary's back. And he's like, so what'd you guys talk about? He's like, oh, just fucking everything, us, baby, stand and close, like, where'd you guys stand? Yes. He's like, I think we're in a good place. I don't know. I meant to say not. He's intentionally being vague because he knows that both of these people like Daisy, right? So he's basically just put a blocker, which he knows he's doing also. He sees Daisy about to get a happy thing. So he's going to come in there and try and ruin it for her by making it like, well, I still like Daisy. So now both of these guys are going to have to back off. This guy's really such a piece of shit. He's such a piece of shit. So he's intentionally being vague. I'm like, oh, I think it went really well. No, it didn't. She just told you you had no fucking chance, dude. But of course you're going to come make it sound like you do have a chance so that they don't have a chance, right? So then he tries to word it like, well, you know, it's just like a classic high tension work relationship, you know, right? Just work and Gary's like, well, actually, he's pretty full on. So what does that mean? Yeah. It was a respectful relationship about chips. And anyway, I need to go. I need to go lie down. I'm pretty buzzed from my sobriety. So Keith is basically like, I don't really know what to do. I don't want to put my foot in something that's going stinky. And Gary's like, well, I guess we're just friends here. I thought, I just, it's just like we fight and it's weird what we've been, what we've been through days. She's like, God, I say it. So, yeah, they're just sort of, let me go. But if you and I ever live together, we've got to get on a good vibe. And then he farts in her face while she's in the bed. She's like, Karen, you're disgusting. Which I think is the moment she realized she's marrying this man. Okay. So then Deanna and Chase, everybody's get waking up the next day and getting ready, you know, and now it's provision times and Davide is fixing lights and the cabin's going, lights, lights, I fix. I'm Italian. And then Gary and Daisy are checking. Oh, Deanna is asking Chase to be slept well. And he's like, I had this dream that two stewardesses came and drug me out of bed. And she seems like so dejected this morning. She's just like, I can't believe someone would do that. Why is he talking to me? And then I was like, I don't want to be in love triangle only put in triangle. So Daisy, she's like, how are you doing? Are you okay? Are you upset at her? And Chase, like hook it up? Do you want to be mad? Diana, do you want to yell at days at Danny? Do you want to do that? She's like, I don't know. He wants this her. And she's like, sure. Well, okay. So would you hook up with them? No, no, never. I mean, I was vibing, but apparently it was not true on his side. And say, well, you know, it was a bit shit because you didn't really have a chance, did you? And she's like, well, I'm not going to fuck somebody on the first stage. Well, with you being reserved as your are, I mean, look, I'm not saying this your fault. I'm just saying he's a boy is an idiot because of worth an idiot, you know? Yeah, you leave a chicken wing on a table. The boy is going to eat the chicken wing on the table, not the one that's in the fridge raider that needs to be prepared first. It's just how they are. We are, I guess. I'm gay. What am I talking about? We're the worst. Yeah. I feel like Danny sees everything as competition and fuck that. I don't fight over men. No, thank you. I have more things to do with my life like sit in corner and stare angrily at something. I have more important things to do like clean the cum rags of people who are fighting over the men, you know? So then Deanna is like, he wanted easier and he got her and that's it. So that's true. So then the guests come on board and Daisy gives them the tour and stuff. And their first complaint is when they see the hot tub and they go, well, it would be nice if that was an actual pool. Maybe next time go to a pool. Yeah. Maybe next time, like read the fucking listing of the Airbnb that you rent. You know what I mean? Yeah. It's like you show to an Airbnb. There's a kitchen sink, but it's not a pool. So there is five points off. Maybe next time look into what a boat is and look into what a pool is and see why maybe they don't play well as friends. Okay. Maybe. Yeah. Yeah. So now they're like, can we have help out back in our bags? And so they're already making all the requests and everything. So they now the, they leave poor and now the guests are asking for drinks and they're just being so obnoxious about it. They're like, Daisy, Daisy, we have another drink. We have a read felling. We have a drink. Oh my God. I love my drink over there. Give me my drink. I lost my drink. Yeah. And they're quite itchy. Did she forget about us? And someone's like, Oh, she's tired. And they said, well, did you tell her to make a margarita? Daisy, get my champagne from my bathroom. I mean, God, I'm not on vacation. If you want something, ask the right people. Oh no, one of her friends is like, I'm not getting that. If you want something, ask the right people for it. So then they're like, I mean, is there a button you can press? Like, where is everybody? Oh my God. And they're just like asking, making lots of requests, everything. So at this point, I would say like, okay, I can imagine that the editing made them look really spoiled because like I can imagine they're so excited that they have all the service they're being jokey amongst themselves. It makes it look like they're doing this. But the rest of the charter though, they just continue to get worse and worse and worse. So now they are now the sales go up because it's time to go sailing. So Captain Glenn is all excited. And now the boat starts to tilt to the left. Everything falls out of the cabinets because once again, the crew has like they act like they had no idea this would ever happen. So they don't lock anything down. So everything's tumbling out of every shelf. And then of course, one of the guests is like, this is not what I expected. Why is the boat going sideways? Don't tell me you never watch the show that you went on. You know what I mean? You didn't even watch one episode. I do not believe you. So then she starts with the whole, oh my God, the boat still thing I can't handle it. I'm going to throw up. I'm definitely going to throw up. I'm definitely for sure going to throw up. Okay, another, another evident, another piece of evidence is this person is a complete asshole. Who is in a group of people and needs to barf and just sits there? I'm going to throw up guys. I'm going to throw up. Then get your ass up and go to the bathroom. What are you doing sitting here? You're going to throw up on me. You don't have anything to throw up into. You're not bent over the side of the boat. Are you planning on me being your target of throw up? Because I will throw your ass overboard. Okay, who the fuck invited this person on? That's the last time I would ever go out with that person. One of my best friends, I was driving her home when she was wasted. And she said, I have to throw up. And I said, all pull over. And she said, I can't wait. Do you know what this little angel did? She barfed in her purse. Wow. That's what good friends do. That's a good friend. You try to accommodate. Also, how about this crazy idea? How about you just like turn the fuck around and barf into the ocean? Okay. Like that's what there was like a literally like a giant space for you to throw up. It'll be okay. Like why don't you throw in your straws and there within five minutes? I know. And on top of that, honestly, she I really do think she's being dramatic because how was it that the choppiness of the sea she was fine with? But when they tilt, that's the issue. I feel like the tilting is not what will make you seasick. I think it's the up and down at the choppiness. So she was just I think being like, Oh my God, it's sideways. I'm gonna get sick now. And she doesn't even wind up puking, by the way, because they would have shown it. So they are running all around to find like a bin, which by the way, they kind of should have had one like they should have like seasick bags like ready like not just like tucked away the the depths of the ship. There should be one on the deck. But now she's like, so she basically says like no more tilting of the boat, which is like, look, I'm not I don't get off on the boat, the sail the sailing the way Glenn does. But like if you're gonna get if you're gonna book a sailboat, why would you book the sailboat and then not want to do any of the sailing? It's just stupid. Yeah. So then one of the friends is like, are you sure it's not the marker we have? Like now you're already blaming service for your friends wanting to throw up with seasickness. So then Daisy's like, Oh my God, it doesn't sound like anyone's throwing up. And then we hear boy boy. But we still get no proof that she threw up, right? I don't think we saw she threw up. I don't think so then Gary's like, so you're not comfortable. You want us to stop, which I think is the first time in history, Gary said that. And she's like, yes. So then Glenn stops and he's like, this is the first time I've ever been asked to stop sailing. Whoa, I hope the God is the last. So now Gary goes to check on Chloise and he's getting that seven course thing ready. And now it's time to put the way the sails away and drop anchor. And now where should we do the cocktail making class? Daisy is asking Danny, which is interesting. Why would you ask Danny? Just know anything. And Danny's like, hit the ball. And then he goes, Oh, that would be cute. It's also wild. The liquor is Daisy. That's where you would have a mixology class. So Daisy asked Danny to like get some stuff ready. And then Danny is like talking to this woman, Jillian, about like when they want to do cocktail mixology and Tommy and everything like that. And they want to do like class at seventh or 30 dinner at nine 30. So I'm just getting this ready. And then Gary, like they're all kind of glum. They're like, Hello, ladies. Do you want to try some sea bulbs today? Blah, blah, blah. So they're like, okay. And so he's like showing how to do it. And they're like, like, um, so wait. So you're literally like a fish in water. Like you're just going to go straight into a shark's mouth or a dolphin's mouth. I mean, this man could be pretty cool. I've already made out with the shark. So try everything once. Am I right, ladies? I love that dolphins mouth is like the worst version for her. She's like, we're going to wind up in a shark's mouth or a dolphins mouth. I guarantee you, the dolphin is not going to be sitting there with its mouth open waiting for you to come into it. Well, you know, little fish don't feel like that. They're terrifying. You know, she's got little fish energy. So then Gary's like, yeah, I don't have any idea if these kids are having a good time. And I don't like that one bit. So fuck it. I'm going to wet these people. You're getting wet girls. And then he starts pulling them into the water and stuff. And they're just bored. They're like, you know, I mean, sea bombs, man, I tried it stupid. Well, the water should be fun, but it's not. They just hate everything. They hate the drinks. They hate the service. They hate the tilting. They hate being here. Everyone's been nothing but lovely to them. And nothing is really bad happened to them yet. They just came on here to be fucking miserable and act like they're better than everything and everything. It's actually been a very functional charter compared to the others, you know, they would have, you know what, this would have been really Emma's time to shine. She'd been like, Oh, so you hate everything. You're bored by everything. You should meet my sister. She says, I am like that. I guess I'm just like you guys. Yeah. Yeah. Emma would have finally identified with some guests, you know, she would have been like, I hate sea bombs as well. I mean, seriously, you hold on. They work, work, work, dragging you through the ocean like a piece of garbage. Unbelievable. I did once find myself in a dolphin's mouth and you know what happened? The dolphin said, you're doing it wrong. I mean, I can't do anything right. Apparently. And then my sister came and rode that dolphin off into the sunset. So now it's getting set up for mixology and Deanna's like, well, you know, let's get what we need for the drinks. And Danny's like, well, I've accepted everything on this bed is extremely unprepared and unclean. Well, you were put in charge of preparing and planning it. So I think this would be on you. Yeah. Exactly. Um, so these guests who requested a mixology class seem so uninterested and unenthused about doing this. So they gather round and Daisy is basically like, all right, ladies, if you're ready, we're going to make some drinks. So then Daisy is like, she starts off with like a mojito, which she makes with brown sugar, which I was like, I didn't think brown sugar was really a a mojito ingredient. That was a strange choice. And they just seem so uninterested. They're like, do you not put brown sugar in a mojito? I thought it was, I thought it was just white sugar. Is it brown sugar? Well, I would say the cane sugar sticks that they put in there. But I don't know what actual kind are you looking at? Brown sugars, like molasses see is brown sugar. Yeah, I don't know. Brown sugar is fancy, but I mean, I don't know. I'm asking. Oh, yes, personally. Well, according to a while. Am I right? Well, a I padma AI says, no, brown sugar is not typically used in a mojito unless you're a gal. The traditional recipe for mojito calls for granulated white sugar. Stupid. Yeah, it doesn't surprise me that Daisy doesn't really know what kind of sugar to use. So, um, which isn't even meant to be a sick burn. But her mixology is like, all right, here's my Google results on the phone. You know, she's just like staring at her phone. She's like, all right, sugar. All right, we've got sugar in there. All right, we've got some ramen there. She's it doesn't look like you're getting a course from someone who really understands mixology, you know, this is yeah, this is kind of like basic bar drinks at this point. And so, but what's funny is that they seem like it feels like these people have never even encountered a mojito before because she's like, all right, we're going to put ramen there and some mint and some sugar and some soda and like, and we're supposed to drink this. Yeah. It's a, it's a delicious, delicious cocktail. Yeah, it's one of the most delicious sugary cocktails. And yeah, sorry. It's like, we're going to drink this and she goes, well, I mean, hopefully it'll be nice. And then the poor husband, there's one husband on this trip who's trying to be positive and no one will let him, you know, but he's like, oh, that tastes really good. And then someone goes really, I don't know. Okay, you hate to drink laced with sugar. Get the fuck out of here. I have no pictures for you people. My God, sugar. It's like a lot. It's like, it's the most beautiful drink. And so then, the Applebee's opened on our town and my mom tried to go laddie dot at the Applebee. She was like, well, let me tell you something about these cheese sticks. They're frozen. Oh, yeah. They're frozen. I was like, yeah, you're a real five star fucking diner there. Where you're like, mom, you're being a bad apple. No, because that's all that's reserved for best boys who don't clean the tops of the picture frames like me. Rondel bad apple. So then they move on to a mango martini, which admittedly to me sounds kind of gross. I like mango, but I just think that like things like that can often go too sweet and go like arise, they make this orange blobby drink. And then this girl goes, it's not sweet enough. That's, that's the thing. Like no one ever says that about cocktails. It's always the other way around. It's too sweet. It's too like clawing. It's too awful. She's like, this, this mango frosty, it needs to be sweeter. Lady, get off this boat. Here's a customer service for mangoes. Call them, let them know. And so Daisy, I like Daisy. Like Daisy's response. She goes, not sweet enough. Good to know. Good to know. And then Shara is like, yeah, all pass on this. Why are you guys being so judgy? You're the ones making the fucking drinks. That's the point. If it's not sweet enough, make it sweet or dummies. You're the bartender's here. That's the point. You're supposed to, she's given you the skeleton. Okay, you add the stuff to it. Like, come on. So Daisy's like, well, naturally, I'm a people person as everyone can tell. I was never watched the show. But to me, I can't read what's going on. People person Daisy. So they're like, they have been shares. Like, I can't drink that one. It's really bad. And like you said, it's like, you made it. You made it. You can fix it. So then now, Marcel is like, I think we should just quit this. And Daisy's like, okay, well, can I catch anything in the meantime? And Shara is like, maybe some water? I mean, gross. So Daisy's like, yeah, this is not sweet enough. It does water. So she's like, it's pool satan. How uncomfortable everybody feels. It is pool satan. So then now one of them is like, so do you got one? If you guys want to do something else like this ever again? And they're like, no. And they're just like all sitting at the sofa, just like bored, unhappy. Daisy's like, Oh, well, I hope they love their dinner quarters. So because these are, remember, they're going to be pairing their cocktails with dinner, you know. So, you know, we got a message in our Instagram now that I'm thinking about it from someone who seemed extremely sweet. So don't worry, I'm not about to diss you a lady who messaged us on Instagram. But she's like, Oh my God, my friend is coming up next week on Below Deck. And I'm really worried that she's not going to come off well. I forgot about that. Did you read that? She's like, I'm so worried. Well, let me just tell you, your friend fucking sucks. And I'm sorry. I don't even care which one it is. They all suck. And I'm so sorry that this couldn't work out better for your friend, but they did this to themselves. I mean, there is no amount of editing on earth that could have made these people look this terrible. These are just shitty people. These are just not nice people. They're not fine. They're not nice. They're horrible. Who goes on a boat and doesn't at least enjoy floating around. They don't even drive floating around. Like, I can understand not being so excited about the water choice because I could see myself being that person. But like, I don't understand how like you want to do a mixology course. And then you're like, you're like, blah about it. Maybe. I mean, maybe it's because these are kind of like, like, like, basic drinks or not. Maybe they want to something more exotic and fascinating, but still like, you have fun. You're drinking your booze, you know, like, like, it's not the drinks and it's not this trilting and it's not the water, it's everything. It's that it's every little thing the whole time. It's that they have to come on and belittle the staff and just treat everybody like crap for themselves to feel better. You know, it's typical below deck, awful guest behavior. And they're really checking all the boxes. So now we're talking about this seven course meal and he's doing a salad baked oysters, crab cake, soup, fish. And he's like, you can back a lot of good stuff into a seven course menu. When I was 11 and did my first seven course menu for President Clinton, don't worry about the timeline. It's not supposed to make sense. He loved it. But, you know, mostly it was cheeseburgers, fries, baked oysters. Those were still there. So if you're going to do a seven course meal, the dishes have to be small and usually like, they're going to be like refined. They'll be like a little this, a little that, you know, it's like almost like a testing menu, you know, almost like a blues single. Yeah. So this is where I got so mad. And this is where I felt something for these guests, because every single course he puts out there is like a full size course. So first he starts out with a big ass wedge salad. One of the heaviest salads you could have. It is, you know, a wedge of iceberg lettuce covered in like usually like a blue cheese and like bacon. I mean, this looked actually very, very nice. This is a Parmesan emulsion. I was like, okay, so like wasn't pinging my radar. It was just like a nice little wedge salad. And serving on a luxury yacht is. Yeah. Well, there's that too. And then they, but it's also then they get paired with these like these cocktails that are so in elegance for a seven course meal. So the first one's getting paired with an aperol spritz. Now this is no shade against an aperol spritz. I love an aperol spritz. But it was just like every cocktail was like aperol spritz is like a peach balini came out next to be paired with oysters like everything. I was like, this is actually a terrible meal. Like I'm a little bit on the guest side about this meal because this is a terrible pairing and it's like too much heavy food for like seven courses. Yeah, this is where we go back to the beginning of this recap where I was like, you know, this is one of those where I thought, do they have a point because up to this point, I've been like, these guests suck. But at this part, I was like, Oh, wow. Well, they had a tasting with nobody who knew how to make drinks. So they didn't teach them fun or good drinks. And now they're having a tasting. And the guy doesn't really know how to do a tasting, obviously, and the people who are making them drinks don't know how to make drinks because repair. Yeah, that's not what although, I mean, it's easier to do a wine pairing than it is an actual alcohol pairing. A mixed drink pairing is very difficult to do. I've never heard of a mixed drink pairing actually. I have, but they're really not as successful. Yeah. And I've heard of a whiskey pairing, you know, something like that. It doesn't always have to be wine. But I've never heard of like, we're gonna have seven different mixed drinks to go with seven different courses. Yeah. And not like, I don't know, mixed drinks that you make. And usually if there is like a mixology pairing, the beverages are very, very like artisanal. It's like there's a shrub and then there's a tincture. And then there's like a vodka that was like aged with some sort of artichoke or whatever. It's like, there's like, the cocktails are given actually kind of like in a culinary approach. But this is just like, April Spritz, Margarita, Long Island iced tea. So it's like, this is like, ooh. But then again, so I'm like, you know, these guests do have a point. But then at the same time, an April Spritz, like you said earlier, an April Spritz is really just two things, and it's a very, very common drink. And they're all acting. They're like, I don't, I don't like this. They're all like, they act like it's something exotic drink. And they're like, rejection. And you're allowed to not like an April Spritz. But I just feel like you can't be like, you can't want an April Spritz. You can't blame, you can't blame the bartender on an April Spritz. I think I guess is the point, right? It's like, the bartender did something wrong. And they're like, ew, this tastes like cough syrup. It's like, okay, well, but it's an April Spritz. So anyway, so Jillian, one of the ladies is like, so do you like April Spritz? To Danny? And then he goes, personally, yes, but it's not my first choice. Why do you say that as a server? Like, everything's a cluster fuck at this dinner. I'm just saying everybody's wrong. That's like, I do bad, the mixology is bad, the food's bad, the guests are bad. It's all bad. So Cloyce is like, okay, through your next course, a play on oysters rock a feller, which I call Cloyce terse rock a dollar. They're like, we don't like wordplay. So he's like, okay, well, this is bad too. You're doing something cutesy for the thing. Don't name it up to yourself. It's very unprofessional oysters rock a feller, like it's just trying to make it look fancy. It's like he's doing like a it's bad. If you're going to do like the refined retro thing, you it's you really have to it's tricky. And like, I don't know, oysters lock Cloyce terse rock a feller, but then they get paired with peach Bellini's. I cannot think of a more disgusting pairing. It's horrible. And it's like, why are you serving a peach Bellini? That's a brunch drink. Why are you serving it now? Who thought to put peach with oysters rock a feller? It's like, oh God. And then Dave comes out with a tray of them and spills the tray of peach Bellini's on the primary. I was like, oh my God. And then starts laughing. It's like, oh, I am so sorry. And like, that was just a nervous laugh. That was one of the worst moments of my life. And I've woken up next to Gary. All right. Thank God. This is just a one night charter. So she keeps saying, I'm sorry, and literally no one will say, okay, they just watch her clean it up. And yeah, so they hate the oysters. And also, she's serving way too many oysters at one time. Why aren't they just serving them one oyster? This is crazy. It should be one oyster. Yeah, that's the thing, that's number two out of a seven course meal. I was getting so mad. And then, but then I'm like, oh God. So these guests do have a point. But then one of them is like, does anyone want mine? This is Jerry, who is the primary? She's like, anyone want mine? Because I don't eat oysters. And so then they, she's gonna get a shrimp replacement. And then they go downstairs. We don't have time for a shrimp replacement. This is a seven course meal. If you don't like something, wait till the next course. It's in two seconds. There's no time. But then they look at the preference sheet. Not only does she say, not only does she not say she can't eat oysters, she actually requests oysters on her preference sheet. This was bad. And you can see that he literally circled where she said that she likes oysters so that he would be sure to include it on the menu. So he went out of the way to give her something that she likes. And she's making it. She's trying to get into something like a weapon. So she's like, so Jillian's like, okay, you know, we need smaller drinks, which I think is valid. And so, sorry, it's like Daisy, this aperol spritz tastes like cost her. That's where we get that. And she goes, well, do you don't like aperol spritz? And she goes, do you? She goes, yeah. So Daisy brings the spritzes downstairs. She goes, they don't like the aperol spritzes. And they just all crack up. Everyone down there just starts laughing. So then like, and so Jillian's like, you know, these drinks are too strong. How am I supposed to have seven drinks? Which is again, that's a lot seven drinks. So, um, Daisy's drink a sip of it, but whatever, I think she's got to finish it overall. So yeah, exactly. So then Chloe springs up. The next one is a cried crab cake. And it's not like a dainty little crab cake. They all get like a giant frisbee on their plate. I'm like, what are you doing to these women? This is so much food. This is crazy for a seven course meal. So then is a mango daiquiri. Yeah. Oh, what is it? Say it again? A mango daiquiri. They're really leaning into the mango too. Yeah. Yeah. I guess maybe it's like there, maybe maybe it was down the request. Just nothing makes sense. Yeah. Very, very malgood. And then they have French onion soup. Why not? Like a spot show. You're in Spain. Like a spot show. So I think he is doing what you were saying, which is the, uh, the nod to like the supper club or whatever, like the 50s. Yeah. But like mid century kind of food, but I don't know. Yeah. It doesn't make sense. So then, uh, and it's all also cold weather food. You know what I mean? So then, uh, they search it with a Hennessy French 75 or whatever. So then Shari is like, well, what happened to Daisy? Did she go take an app? She's serving you seven fucking courses, dude. And she's probably not wanting to come up here because every time she comes up here, you guys bitched her. It's probably hiding for you. Now it's 11.50 pm, which I also did not even notice this. They 11.50 pm when the fifth course comes up, it's a giant Mediterranean sea bass, squash puree with a passion fruit mojito. Like me. I mean, look, if the guests requested tropical drinks, then that's fine. And you could definitely have a tropical drink with a crab cake and even sea bass, but it just seems like this is such an elegant and disgusting pairing that's happening all night long. So then they're just exhausted and they're like, we're so tired. This is too much alcohol. Can you split the drinks? And Daisy's like, you don't have to drink them all. I'm like, no, split them. Don't say that to a guest. Like it's so weird. Even though I just said it, I didn't say it to the guest. It's just weird. So then they're like, no, just instead of making six, make three and then split them and she goes, Oh, okay, I'll do that then. And then one of the friends is like, Shari, you're just getting on her nerves. And she goes, well, it's her job to remember what the guests want, right? She's definitely talking. Oh, and one of her friends is like, yeah, well, she's definitely talking about you now, babe. But Shari is right because that woman Julian did request like a small drink and they gave her a full-size drink. So like that is, I mean, I give a point to share right here. Yeah. So then all those Shari is the one that can't remember what she wants. But so then Glenn checks in on dinner and Daisy stupidly is like terrible. They hate everything. They hate me. I'd knock champagne on them. Two of them don't need oysters, but it wasn't on their preference sheet. And he's like, Oh, is the mood okay? And she's like, damn telling you, it's like nurses on a Saturday night without a cave to go to. Oh, no, it's terrible. You know, we're used to guests walking off happy and having a great holiday. And I'm just trying to remember to bring it up to a higher level. It's not moving in the right direction like this boat trying to stay afloat, which it rarely does. I'm starting to worry. You know, I remember this happened one time in 1982. I just said that so you guys are up. There it is. The picture of me with an Afro. Okay, there it is. All right, go on with the show. So then they're like talking shit and Glenn's like, you guys stop it because they made like show up at the staircase. So then Cloyce goes upstairs. He's like, Oh, right. This next course for you this evening is a filet mignon mashed potatoes inside of another filet mignon and a cream sauce. And you have to eat every single bite of it. And so then they get an apple crumble with vanilla ice cream and a baby. It's too much, which is Kalua and Bailey's in again. It's delicious. Actually, I love a baby. Yeah. So it's a lot. It's just a lot. A lot of heavy stuff. So then downstairs, I guess Keith has just woken up and he's like, close, close, close, close, has a Royce Royce Royce. That's a Rolls Royce Royce. Okay. And he's like, good morning Keith money. Yeah. And then the guests just like got a bad dog. Oh, and he's like, fuck tonight, dropping the ball. It is. So. Yeah, I remembered last night. So giving chase shit about hooking up the other night. He's like, so how are you in bedtime stories the other night? He said, great man, I actually got three bedtime stories. If you know what I mean, ding, ding, ding. Deanna's just playing the triangle still. I will practice triangle and not care about the bedtime story. And then he's asking, what about you? What about you, close? And he's like, well, I think honestly, the one I find to be most attractive is Daisy and obviously a bit older. And Jesus is like, well, like you're a equal bro. Like your head chef. I don't give a fuck how old she is. If you're intrigued and she's intrigued, you might just have to get it out of your system, buddy. Yeah. So then Gary is checking me with Daisy their last day. And she's like, I'm all full today. I'm dreading it. And so she's, she's like, Oh, taste, taste, taste, taste, taste, taste, taste, taste, taste, taste, taste. Listen, there's a bag in the car dark. I'm worried that's vomit. And so he's like, do you want me to get it and open it? Just, I'd love it. So he opens it and he's like, yeah, it's vomit. Oh, why do you have to do that? Don't put your face in it. Yeah. Also, like, why didn't you puke in your toilet? Is that, is that a strange request? Am I in? Like, like, it has to be charries, right? It's like the lady who refuses to barf in the toilet. Yeah, because then later on, she mentions, she's like, Oh, I couldn't find, I couldn't find my trash bin. So we had to find a bag for me to throw up. And I'm like, what about your toilet? Have you never thrown up in a toilet? Do you understand how to do it? Super weird. So, um, they, they doc, they're sort of, they serve breakfast, they serve like, serve like a quiche. And as soon as I saw that quiche, I was like, they're not going to like that. I'm just telling you right now, they're not going to like this quiche. They're going to be like, why is this omelette so tall? And why does it have a crust? Well, they do not like it. You're correct. One of them's like, yeah, that is not good. So, and now Daisy walks by Chase and Danny, who are hugging and Daisy's like, two, neither of you have something to do. Go find something to do. And Danny immediately gets all defensive and she's like, Oh my God, as if you're doing any fucking thing, bro, she's literally walking by to work. She's exactly. And Danny's like, you know, you know, Chase comes like, pass for like three minutes and just comes and speaks to me. And then Daisy walks past and has like the goddamn audacity to be like, do you not have anything to do? I'm like, it's not her audacity. It's her job as your boss to make sure that in this moment while the guests are having breakfast that you're, I don't know, cleaning their bedrooms or doing something other than flirting with Chase for folks sake woman. So Diana's, Deanna's like, yeah, but I mean, it annoys me too. She's just, well, then say something, you know, don't get pissed off. It may say something she does. And then you act like this. And by the way, Daisy did just say something to you and look at your reaction. So don't act like you're literally said something. You're so calm with people just saying things to you. Weird. She literally just said, if you have time to lean, you have time to clean. And like, now you're acting like it's shocking. And no one said that you were time to lead when you were full on leaning. So the guests are packing up and everything. And Sherry, they're like, they gather into like the salon and Sherry is like, okay, guys, just between us, does anyone have any complaints? Do you think that you had five star service? And Jillian's like, well, I got sick and we couldn't find a star service, I think, because I was like, how many stars are there? At some point they said, is this seven star service? I was like, wait a minute, are we changing the rules now? Jesus, we got to fight for a star as these days. And so yeah, Jillian's like, I got sick and we couldn't find a trash can. And then this woman Tony goes, yeah, I don't know what to do with the trash can go burp in a toilet, people. Jesus. So this is weird. They're having like a little meeting about what they're going to tip, I guess. And so then they bring in Glenn and well, the crew, someone on the production crew obviously tells Glenn, they're like, go talk to them. So he's like, hi, is everything okay? Is there something you want to tell me? And so Jillian's like, well, we're trying to debrief to find out pluses and things that could improve. And when it comes to this level of luxury, you want what you pay for. And there was just a few hiccups here. And Sherry is like, Jillian, just tell the truth, do it. And so Daisy is looking in there knowing that they're about to get screwed, you know, because this is definitely like a we're not tipping you situation. So do you think this is a switch where they're not going to tip? I think they'll tip. I don't think it'll be a good tip. Right now, I think the the lowest tip of the season is still Dr. Contessa, who actually had a perfectly, I think a generally good charter. So we're going to see, can these will these people be better or worse than Dr Contessa? Because that is the bar to to beat. So I don't know, they might not tip. They were real. They were real, really, they were real pissed. I mean, to have a whole meeting about it and the captain's air and everything is not looking good. But we'll see you. Yep, we'll see. But for now, that's it for this episode. We'll see what happens next week. Thanks for everyone who listens, keep an eye out for that crappies ballot and also don't forget to buy tickets to the crappies themselves February 1st, New York City, town hall, or just come see us on the road at watchercrapins.com for the tickets. Bye everyone. Watch what crappins would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King. Our way is the amber way. It's always automatic with Ashley Otto. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. Put your hands together for Carly Clap. Catherine D. Bernardo has our heart. Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offa, Dana C. Dana do. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniella, etchles. 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A group of miserable people amble onto Below Deck Sailing Yacht and refuse to find joy in anything. To be fair, they’re served a terrible meal with sad drinks. Also, Gary celebrates sobriety with a glass of wine. To watch this recap on video, listen to our Sold on SLC bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens.
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