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Watch What Crappens

#251: Ham Moons Over Miami and the Great Chilean Sea Bass Debate

Duration:
2h 14m
Broadcast on:
22 Dec 2015
Audio Format:
other

Time Codes:
Opening: Steve Harvey and Miss Columbia and earbud manners on planes.
Real Housewives of Atlanta: 11:35
Vanderpump Rules 1:19:25

It’s Christmas week! What better time to discuss abusive nephews and ham slapping? The Real Housewives of Atlanta in Miami was a doozy this week. Fights, social commentary, and super bitchy remarks by Tootie’s mom Docker wearing husband. Then we head over to Vanderpump Rules, where people finally learn to be nice to LaLa after they realize they’re boyfriends will be leaving them for Vegas trips until the end of time. Merry Christmas!!

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For hers.com/crapins, hers weight loss is not available everywhere. Compounded products are not FDA approved or verified for safety, effectiveness, or quality. Prescription required restrictions apply. Texture is the app that gives you an all access pass to the world's best magazines right on your phone or tablet. Texture is offering our listeners a free trial right now when you go to texture.com, Crapins! Hello and welcome to the Watch What Crapins podcast. The podcast about all that crap we'd love to talk about. On the Braves, I'm Ronnie Karam from Trash Talk TV. And here we are, Christmas Week, with the gorgeous little Christmas angel, even though he's a Jew. Just like Jesus, Ben Mandelker of the B site blog in the banter blender. Hello, Ben, hello. I shouldn't say it's a B site blog. It's a B site blog. It's okay, you can go to B site blog. But it's just B site blog.com. We've been married for years now and I'm saying the in front of your website. Well, no, it just means you're getting older because now you start to say things like, I'm going to turn on the HBO. I'm going to turn on the Bravo. On the Braves, the Braves, the Braves. It's an actual thing. So thank you guys so much for listening. It's a very special week, not just because it's the holidays and, like, we're all parting with our families at home. But because I'm in a bed, I'm not at a couch desk today. I'm in my bed at my mom's house and my mom's in dad's house. No desk. There's a pillow. I'm cross-legged and my new camo skinny jogging pants thing. And you're also speaking sort of quietly as if as if Krampus himself is sneaking around in the hallway and you don't want to alert him of your presence. Well, I got new buds and they're really suctioning right into my eardrum. And I can't tell how loud I'm being. I'm like deaf in here. I'm like, bleh! I'm not taking one out, so my tone's changing. But also, I'm holding my mic today like I'm singing at a bar. Well, that's like me on an airplane because, you know, so many idiots wear their earphones on an airplane. And then, like, when a flight attendant comes by, I was like, "Would you like anything to drink?" They go, "I'll have a ginger rail and a diet coke, please." And you're like, "Please, can you, do you not know how to use earphones?" That's me. So when they come by, I always try to speak quietly because I, of course, also, actually, no, I do usually take out my earphones. But occasionally, I don't. Occasionally, I don't. And those times, I try to speak more quietly, but I actually fear that I overcorrect. So, I mean, who knows, life is very difficult. It really is. To headphones or not to, and why are you doing it? Because I wear these suction headphones, and I do yell when the stewardess comes and people give me that look. And I think, "Fuck you, I don't have a baby." You know, like, people with a baby can do it. I'm never going to have any children. This is my "fuck you" to everybody else, okay? Yeah. I love the little weight, so I'm not in two seats at the moment. So while I can't piss you off in that way or have a baby, I'm going to wear my little headbeds and scream on the plane. Enjoy yourselves. You know what I actually hate? I don't know if this has happened to you, but it's happened to me surprisingly more often than you would think. There's, like, a couple or there are people who are flying together and they're in different rows, but they're like ones behind the other. And then, like, the one from behind taps the one that's, like, in front and, like, gives an update about what they're watching on the plane. And, like, are you watching this? Are you watching this? It's really funny. You should watch it. I'm, like, you're, like, yelling about your stupid opinion about the Katherine Heigl movie. No one cares. Please. You shouldn't be so proud, a student, that you're watching Katherine Heigl right now. Both of you in the public. It's always, I mean, it's always like that, or it's, or it's, like, are you watching Big Bang Theory? Are you watching it? It's funny. You should watch it. You would like it. It's funny. You should turn it on. You like this episode. So funny because Christmas comes around and I'm, like, this reminds me of the love and the joy that the world is about, you know, and then I get on a plane. And then it's all dead again. I'm, like, thank you. Now I can really enjoy Christmas with my true personality. Hating everybody. Yeah. Well, you know, it could be worse. You could be Miss Columbia. Oh, my God. I know we're talking about Bravo, and I haven't even done the opening yet. But you have to tell me about that. So hold on. Come to WatrotCrapins.com for all our links. Go to patreon.com/wotrotcrapins for the bonus episodes and to subscribe as a premium member. Those bonus episodes are so fun. Go get them. The ringtones are about to go up. Those are always really fun. The Google Hangout was amazing this month. So funny. And this week, by the way, we haven't recorded our bonus episode yet. We're going to record it on Wednesday because tomorrow, tomorrow from one of our recordings, which is Tuesday, who cares? Ronnie is seeing Star Wars, which I saw yesterday. So the bonus episode is going to be us giving our full rundown on Star Wars, the Force Awakens. So if you want to hear our opinions on that movie, come listen to the bonus episode. Oh, that's going to be so amaze. I can't wait. I'm going to go with the whole family. So excited. This episode has been brought to you by the gorgeous and talented Marvin J. Marvin! Marvin! Marvin! Marvin! Who else we love? Miss Kristy Doherty. Kristy, this goes out to you. I was trying to think of a Christmas mom, but then I'll- [MUSIC] That's better. [MUSIC] Kristy, Kristy, Kristy, Kristy, Darney. Marvin J. Marvin J. Chris, Kristy, Darney. Marvin J. Marvin J. Chrissy Doherty. Chrissy, Chrissy, Chrissy Doherty. I want to play a bell. I was really jealous of bell people. I was like, now that's teamwork. Okay, so then- [LAUGH] I don't like watching the news and stuff because gross. So tell me what happened with this Miss Columbia and Steve Harvey. He's in drubs. I can't imagine he's really in trouble. I mean, it was a mistake. Well, I mean, I read it on Twitter, so it's like burning him alive, you know? So basically, it's, you know, Miss Universe. It's a big moment, and he says, and the winner of Miss Universe is Miss Columbia, and she goes, and she gets- they put the crown on her, and she's crying, and she has the flowers, and she has the full walk all the way to the front of the catwalk thing, and does the waving. And everyone's cheering as if it's like the World Cup. And then she walks, she- [CROSSTALK] She's a sea cup. Yeah, exactly. [LAUGH] World Triple A Cup. [LAUGH] And so- [LAUGH] It's also safety. She has like triple A boobs, but also like gets picked up when her keys are locked in her car. Oh, Triple A. So, so she's there, and then Steve Harvey comes out and he's like, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. This is like, he's basically like, this is my fault. It's actually, Miss Columbia is the first runner up. Miss Philippines is Miss Universe. And there's all this confusion. The audiences, it doesn't know what's going on. Miss Philippines is like, wait, what? Wait, I'm sorry, huh? Everyone's confused. And ultimately what it comes down to is that the two women wind up side by side again, and they take the crown off of Miss Columbia. Oh, that is cold right there. [LAUGH] No, if a murder was committed with that crown later, her DNA would be on that crown and she'd be in jail. And Mark Hellenberger probably would have put her there. Not cool, Steve Harvey. Yeah. And so Steve Harvey is apologizing, he's like, this is my fault. Da da da da da. I mean, it's like the most hilarious thing. And I don't think he shouldn't be gross. It was a mistake. And now, I have a friend who is like, I work in production. And it's really the cue card guy's fault. And it's so hard, it's not as mistake. Be nice to Steve Harvey. I'm like, I mean, it's like, it was funny. Like, I'm sorry, I'm still gonna laugh. It was such a major blunder. That's a pretty big one. I like that. Be nice to Steve Harvey. Well, forget Steve Harvey. Be nice to Columbia, that poor thing. And then-- Well, she'll be more famous in Seattle than she ever put a thing. --used crown. He's like, oh, never mind you one. Here's your used crown. She's like, thanks. Well, I can only imagine that the Vanderpump Rules kids had actually written the cue cards. He'd be like, and the winner of the 2015 Miss Universe Passion is a basic bitch. Oh, something must be wrong here. I don't think you have to announce that. I think that's assumed when you watch it. [LAUGHTER] Take a good look, Steve Harvey. Take a good look. It's the last time you got this honey. He's all spitting on Miss Columbia's door on the way out. [LAUGHTER] Yeah, Miss Columbia would spit on her door, I think. [LAUGHTER] I knew it wasn't Miss Columbia, but you know what? I said it anyway. So go suck it, bitch. Why don't you do that? Why don't you suck it? Actually, Half Indian Post actually had Kristen Dowdy write a review of the Miss Universe pageant. And her review was in its entirety. Seriously? Seriously? Oh, I'm just joking. Seriously? [LAUGHTER] That's what I imagine all her columns would be if she were ever hired by by Half Indian Post. [LAUGHTER] Seriously? What's your world-- What's your ultimate goal? What would you do if you won Miss America? Well, I'd make t-shirts. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] I'm in a much better place now. I'd make t-shirts that say, I'm in a better place, world peace. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] So as you can tell, I mean, this podcast is already up to a crazy start. This is what happens when one of us goes home and we record the podcast. Fuck it, I'm home, I'm getting drunk all day. Yeah, so I'm surrounded by drinks, cigarettes. You know what other shit I'm surrounded by. I don't got to explain at all. I'm in Texas now. You're like-- Cactus and Yosemite Sams. Oh my god. Pitbull, I have not had a think-then bar because it's at night and it was not that I don't eat them at night. But I just-- that's like what always happens is I'm like, I'm finishing watching a show and I haven't had lunch yet and I have to run down to Ralph's and grab a think-then bar and my coffee and come up and podcast. But no, it's night time, so I had dinner. So I've had enough agado. And I've had enough agado inside. I made myself an espresso and I was like, "Wait a second, I think there's some vanilla ice cream in the back of that freezer." And I pulled it out and dusted off the ice crystals. Darling, you have to explain what an avocado is. I'm not the only witty. The only-- It's when you pour-- The only person who's like, "What the fuck?" You basically take a scoop of vanilla ice cream and you pour espresso over it, a shot of espresso. We're just like a cup of espresso. And that's it. But it's like a very fancy way of saying espresso over ice cream. Well, I was kind of sad when you told me what it was earlier because I actually had an avocado tonight at a restaurant. Oh. It was part of my meal and I was eating it. And I was like, "God, something's hard in there." And I pulled it out and it was the price sticker. And you remember when we were watching Top Chef-- Yes. So one, and that guy made the tomatoes and there was a price sticker still on it. And I was like, "Come on, you lazy fuck." And I went off on this guy, Karma. It's a game. It's happened. Something I saw in the podcast came in and bit me in the ass. Well, I mean, I bit it in the price. You get it. Yeah, I do get it. I'm telling you right now, take the keys. Danny's drunk. All right. I'm going to take the keys of my mini-humber and we are going to drive this podcast. Really slowly. Really slowly and erratically through heavily traffic streets. Where we shouldn't be. So we're talking about Atlanta and then Vanderpump Rules. But for right now, Real House of Atlanta, this was an interesting episode I thought. This one got me going. It's got me fired up. I have thoughts. I have opinions. I have a lot to say. Yes, this was a crazy episode. First off, again, at the beginning of the season, I thought, "Oh, no, we're screwed." Because it was kind of slow and I really can't watch Cynthia the whole time pretending to live, like having a normal life. But wow, it's gotten so good. And I have been laughing my ass off. And this one made me laugh and made me scream and then laugh again. Well, I was happy because sometimes on this show, it doesn't really move me to an emotion beyond amusement. But I like it on these shows when I get into the situation and I feel something. I get angry at a character. Like, that's the fun part. And if all we're doing is just laughing at every time Porsche puts on a thong and gyrates, you know, it's like, that's fine, but I want to be invested. Well, I was fired up. So this episode began, we're still in Miami. It's exactly where we left off last week, which is on this boat. So they're on this boat. They've just been at like this bar. They're heading back to the house. The women have recruited Tammy's nephew Glen and Glen's friend. I think his name was Jarron. I don't remember, but he doesn't matter who he is. And then there's also this guy Oliver. And if you remember where we left off, Porsche decided to play Never Have I Ever, which again is really a it's a bold move when making a first impression on a guy. But sometimes guys, you know, it's also leading to everything. Because what has Porsche done really? Not much? Yeah. Well, I don't know what she's done, but we know we quickly learn what Chamea's done. She's like, never have I ever had a golden shower. And she's like drink and the best part after she drinks and basically was saying like, yes, I've had a golden shower. They cut to Kim Fields, Judy, who has escaped this game and is in the corner of the boat. And she's on the phone with her family with her husband. And she's like, hi, honey. So the SpaghettiOs were a big hit. Yeah, I was dying. She goes to call about SpaghettiOs. Meanwhile, they're talking about golden hours. So, so good. Why does Cynthia have dot eyes? Cynthia gets a facelift. I don't know how she does it between episodes because this is a continuation of last week. Did she go downstairs into the pantry and like have her eyes propped open with toothpaste? She has dot eyes today. What happened? Cynthia, explain your eyes too much. Peter's brew. She had an awful garter that went wrong. Didn't use Peter's brew. Peter's brew. So Glenn has already started his because Kenya was snapping at him. She was like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, you. Hey, young one. Like an old lady, you know, like asking for someone to bring her a mint. Her son's like, you young man. And he's like, oh, Hail, what did he say to her? He's like, oh, no, I know you're not snapping at me. I know you're not snapping at me. Yeah. She said, I was just trying to get your attention. You ought to get a better way. You got a better way. So he was already nasty. So when we come back, she's still trying. But she's not snapping because he's yelled at her. So she's well, she's also being funny too because she, you know, you're always saying how Kenya always is talking in drag and drag speak now. So it was kind of funny that her response to him was like, oh, she's spicy. She's spicy. I was like, I don't think that's going to work on him. I don't think he's going to respond well to drag talk. Yeah, this guy seems like he's going to love drag queens. She's like, wow, I hope this guy beats me up in a bar and like drags me around a neighborhood, you know, in his pickup truck. Yeah. So they go, so they go back to the house. And they're also like smiling up on that BJ's while driving. I have to say, I'm making fun of her eyes to be ridiculous. Because seriously, she's like, and never have I ever given a BJ while I'm driving. Oh, she didn't even say it. She didn't even say it as as eloquently as that. She's like, never have I ever. And you know, she has this thing when she doesn't know the right word. She sort of plays. It's almost like she's playing a piano or sort of swiping both ways on the piano or just with her hands, like her fingers are forward, her wrist is flopped forward or her fingers forward. And she just sort of spreads out like a miniature breaststroke. She's like, never have I ever done a job, you know, sexual job. And I was like, what? You're a prostitute. She's like, no, no, like in the car, like in a, like send it. Just say, never have I ever blown Peter in a car. It's okay. She's doing a little breaststroke. She searches her head forward too. I wish I was there so I could be like, oh, Cynthia, you so bad. So anyway, would you guys get in your valve pack? Did anybody get anything from Chili's? Never have I ever gotten anything in my valve pack. Drag. Wait, let me guess, was there a coupon for a car wash or a driveway? There's like five car washes. And I'm like, do these car wash people go through the valve pack and see that they're paying for basically ads literally side by side with other ones? Did you pay more to be in the front? Like, how does this work? Have you ever noticed that there actually ads on your hangers from dry cleaner? And I sort of, it's one of those things that's just really noise. I don't look at it, but the other day, well, like not so long ago, I looked at it. And the ad on my dry cleaner hanger was for a woman, a woman named Suzanne. And she was advertising her flautist skills. She's like, need a flautist? Call Suzanne. That is so LA right there. It's your resume. Like, here's my treatment. Oh, you know what? It's like, where did you, you know what this orchestra needs? It needs, it needs a flautist. Where do we find, you know what? I was, I saw Suzanne on my hanger. Let's call her up. So weird. I was so mad getting dressed this morning because I had lines on my shoulder. And I was like, goddamn wire hanger. And I went to throw it away and noticed that there was a flautist listed on there. Suzanne, you're hired, bitch. But don't touch my sweater again until you're right now. Wait, is that what wire hangers do to sweaters? Yes, that's why you don't use wire hangers. Mommy dearest had a point, okay? Like, she was a bitch. I'm mad. She was abusive, but she had some good points. I mean, I don't use wire hangers to sweaters, but what is it? Well, you're a gay person. Like, you better not have any wire hangers. Because I feel like it's bad, but I don't actually know what it does. I have wire hangers to prove to people that I get my laundry done outside of the house. So it makes me feel fancy. Even though it's like poor and like the ceiling's falling in. What'd you ask me? Oh, wire hangers. When you use wire hangers on your clothes, your clothes hang heavy. And it puts a little dent, a dent, but like a little tiny line of a dent. And you can never get it out. Like, sometimes it goes deep in there. So if you have heavier clothes, no wire hangers. Well, thank you. Because I mean, I always knew like wire hangers are bad, but I didn't actually know why. Never have I ever used a wire hanger drink. Awkward. It was like, it was like, now I can get down with this game. Never have I ever used Purell drink. Cranberry juice. Kim's like, never have I ever splurged and bought those little laundry detergent pods instead of powdered laundry detergent drink. Never have I ever gone a few miles over the speed limit during carpool drink. I'm surprised she walked away during the golden showers question. I mean, the bitch gets beat on by little boys every day. Got kids. If anybody knows the golden showers, little kids. I just like that she was checking in on how the SpaghettiOs were received. Like, as if there would ever be any question. Like, like I was really nervous about those SpaghettiOs. Were they, was that going to work? I'm just, I'm concerned that I'm the kids might not like SpaghettiOs. Yeah. She's like, hi, honey. I'm just calling to make sure you enjoy that processed food that's probably building cancer cells in our children as we speak. Is that going okay? Like you can't be calling is a good mom and then asking about SpaghettiOs, you know? Hey, honey, I just is calling, you know, the UFOs soup. Did you, did you serve that to them? Did they get scared that there were real aliens in there? Because I want to make sure they know it's fake, right? Okay, good. They liked it. Do you ever have that UFO soup when you were a kid? Does this make any sense to you? Wasn't it just the alphabet soup special edition with the UFOs in it? It was a bit, yeah. It's basically like alphabet soup, except it had, yeah. The instead of al, instead of letters, it had little UFOs and they had meatballs that were meteors. It was the shit. Like literally, probably now that we know about food. Between that and those frog popsicles, you know what I'm talking about? Yes, I do. Frogs have a chocolate back, chocolate back and like M&Ms for like eyeballs or something. Ooh, I love those. So this is a perfect way to go into abuse. Just kidding. Yes. No, talk about abuse. I know, let's, let's, you know, I think, I think this espresso was a little stronger than I was bargaining for. 'Cause I like the walls. I am off the walls. I mean, we, I mean, between the UFOs and the frogs. So, um, so they are the whole game, man. Well, let's just fucking party. I mean, everybody's just driving home or like, partying with their family. Anybody listening to this at Christmas wants to party. Do it, Ben. Your coke, your line of coke is some espresso. So you do it, girl. You go, girl. I'm behind you. Ho, ho, ho. Literally behind you walking very slowly. Okay, so Kim. So these are gentlemen. She introduces them to Kim. They bring them home. She's like, would you like to meet these gentlemen? I was like, you've been obviously in the corner on your phone the whole time. Yeah. So Candy comes by and she's like, oh, see now we have visitors. Excuse me. I was actually burping in the process of doing my Kenyan personation, which probably made it sound more accurate. But it's also the look she has on her face. Like she's, you know, that look you get when you're about to let out a burp. You're like, oh. She has that look when she walks in the room like, oh my gosh. She's always got that. She has that skeptical look. I love when Candy gives that look like. See now, first. Rala, Rala. This one's not even that. This one's that. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. So anyway, they, um, so the guy's there. And basically they're the move. All the activity has goes outdoors. The hot tub party, the hot tub thing. So, so Candy takes a seat with Kim. They're on the Chez Lounge. It was enjoying, you know, all other people are by the hot tub. And Glenn walks by Candy and he's like, by the way, I don't think I told you, but, but congrats, sweetheart. Which by the way is already like the way he was saying it. Like it's one thing to say, oh, congrats on the baby. But for him to be like congrats, sweetheart was so, um, what's the right, right? We're, I don't know if I want to say offensive. It was like, like aggressive. He's extremely aggressive and sexist. He's like, hey, he's like, hey, I didn't say, you know, congrats. How he was so gross. He was like leering and gross, like trying to start shit. Shit, he wants to start shit to be famous. I get it, but you're going to fight with a pregnant lady on TV. I don't think he was trying to. No, so I just posted something on our Facebook page. This guy was just shot in a leg two months ago. Literally he was at TI's restaurant in, uh, called Scales in Atlanta. And he got into a fight and then wound up out in the parking lot. And he got shot in the leg and had, and was taken to the hospital. This guy is no good. He is no good. He was not. Why would someone open a restaurant called Scales? Who wants to eat and speak of a scale at the same fucking time? That's the craziest name I've ever heard. Scales. Seriously, fish. Seriously, scales. This is the punishment. You know, it's like, let me eat. I'll worry about the scale tomorrow, bitch. I'm not going to go eat at the scale. That's disgusting. That's that's an eating disorder. Bigger question is who goes to TI's restaurant? I can't. I mean, like, it's just not what I would be looking for in the culinary experience. Looking for like treasure island or something. They're like those must stand for something. Maybe it stands for TI-1 diabetes. So stupid. I know. Sorry, everyone. So anyway, the point is this guy Glenn, he walked over and he as if by him congratulating Candy is like some big favorite that she should be so appreciative for. And he's like, congrats, sweetheart. So he so she's basically like, she's like, okay, she's like, oh, thanks. And his immediate response was, what attitude was that? Like, dude, first of all, don't speak to him in that way. Don't speak to anyone that way. And she just said, thanks. You just said something that was, you know, you just was very condescending to her. And then she says, oh, thanks. You know, with maybe a little edge or just Candy being skeptical. Like, who are you? And why are you saying calling me sweetheart? And then you're going to be angry at her that she has an attitude. Yeah, you can't even really put reason into this because this guy was just fucking crazy. And he was looking for a fight, like literally with the pregnant ladies trying to start a fight. And he said, what's that? I don't give you attitude. And she says something like, dude, it's cool. We're cool. And he said, yeah, I'm cool until someone disrespects me and starts getting all. He had a real. It was like very borderline, you know, in terms of like, like the whole world was out to get him. He was very, very victim, he was very, like, everything was like, I'm trying to be like, you don't talk to me that way. Why would you talk to me? He's felt very slighted. It was really, it was really crazy. But also he's an idiot because people should know, forget that Candy is pregnant. You don't start up with Candy. Okay. You know, we know where she comes from. We've seen Mama Joyce. We've seen that shoe. You don't start with Candy. Well, Candy sure knows how to deal with abusive people. That's for sure. Like, Candy's not going to let anything escalate. She will keep Mama Joyce calm for so long. I mean, really? Mama Joyce could have been on a shooting spree by now. That pitch is crazy. So Candy knows how to deal with the new beaser. So she's like, whatever, leave abuser. And he goes, he walks away. He's not going to get anything from her. And he goes like, it's right next to Shiree. And then meanwhile, so then things come down a little bit for a moment. And Portia, you know, she has this guy Oliver there. And Portia, like, gets out of the hot tub. And she starts twerking in slow motion. And it was just very odd. And my favorite part about it was that Candy, Kim, and Cynthia were sitting off to the side. And they were just making snarky remarks and basically doing the play by play. And I was like, you know what? I could watch all three of them do a play by play. I'd just anything for days on end. They were so funny just with their little remarks. I loved it. Forget the people's couch. Portia was so hilarious and so needy. Just shaking that ass. And she really can't flap it so slowly. It was like a really nice inspirational commercial where you see a bird flapping its wings really slowly on the camera. I don't know what kind of bird. It was like planet Earth. Earth when they show like a hummingbird in slow motion. It's like, see now you can see its wings. It was like Portia. I wanted like a British narrator to come through and be like, the Portia moves up and down. But instead of humming bird wings, it's like two hams going up and down really slowly. You see them. We'll get to Vanderpump Rules soon enough. So the judging from the side was really funny. They were like the old man muppets on the sides. I was dying. And so then the nephew tells her. Candy said the only note I wrote down from that was Portia went from being a Stafford wife to a Queen of Botlin. So then the guy says, so now Glenn starts up again. And he tells Shirei that she has an energy problem. I was like, right? Didn't he tell Shirei that? I was like, and I don't even know where it came from. And I was like, you have some balls. It was one thing was like, I thought it was crazy when you went after Candy. But going after Shirei, I mean, this is a woman who went up against that. I didn't see that. I put let me see here. Portia with man. I put Portia was talking to her man and saying, I make my own money. I just need a man for support. I was like, what? Shut up. You just need a man for support. Didn't a man like buy, lease you that car and that butt too? Like you've literally got a lease sewn into you. Don't a man bot. Get out of here. I'm looking for money. Maybe not today, but long term. She's like, you're a short con. Never have I ever. So anyway, and then Glenn yells at Kenya for saying Tammy. Well, so Tammy starts coming over. That's what I got. So is there something later? Yeah. No, no, there's something before. You know, maybe it was the way the editing was, but it looked like he told Shirei, like you have an attitude problem too. And I don't know. Maybe he was like, maybe he was looking at Kenya or something like that, but it looked like he had said it to Shirei. So I was shocked. I was shocked that Shirei didn't react, which is what makes me think that maybe he didn't. He wasn't saying it to Shirei or was out of context, but I was just like, wow, you're going to start with Shirei. Shirei, who's gone up. But you're like, you may be, you may be tall, but she went up against Bob Woodfield. Like she can, Shirei is jacked. She can handle her own. So like don't go up against Shirei. Now you're really not afraid. I think it was at Tammy or Kenya because Tammy was coming over from the pool. And you know, Tammy's just always like, right? Well, this is, this is a little bit later when Tammy came over. Oh, yeah. And I just didn't write it. Maybe I was just so entertained by Portia being ridiculous, talking about how she just needs love. It's like, shut up. He just gave someone a trophy because he's rich. Like two weeks ago, shut up, Portia. Actually, on second thought, please don't ever shut up, Portia. Just keep talking. So then though, what happens is what, what you were saying is that like, Tammy comes like, she's wasting. She comes sort of like paddling over. And Kenya is like, oh, here comes Auntie. Here comes Auntie. And then Glenn's like, don't even talk bad about my auntie, which I thought was a really funny thing to say. But he was like, I'm like, dude, she wasn't, she wasn't like talking bad at all. She was, it was like whatever. I mean, Kenya was fine. She was just, you know, like being playful, you know. Yeah, that's nothing for Kenya. But he was ready to just go with anybody. And yeah, Tammy's like coming over, yeah. And then he's like, don't mean my Auntie. And then I wrote, I quoted him saying, you beaches here want some bullshit. I was like, oh, I'm not going to play here with this bitch ass, bitches bullshit. Tammy's like, what do you matter? It's the lyrics to one of his songs. So then, so at this point, Kenya is like, okay, she's had enough. So she goes over to like the actual, the other aunties and goes over to Kim and Kenya. And it's like, he's just being weird. He's being weird, which was actually a pretty understated comment for Kenya. Normally she'd be like, he's just being aggressive and be, I don't feel safe. But she was just like, he's being weird. He's being weird. And then they're like, let's call over Tammy and let's have Tammy ask that they leave. So they call over Tammy. Tammy comes over. She is wasted. She's like tottering over to them. And you could just, Kim, at this point, Kim feels she just had such a look of her on her face. She was just like, it's like, she'd never seen a drunken person before. And you could just seen her mind. She's like, too many speadios. She's been served too many speadios. Must call home and warn them. They found my M&Ms in the couch cushion. She's on a crack binge. So Kim's like praying and yeah, so they were telling Tammy and she's like, she go to, he got aggressive. Wait, what? He's smarted off to you. What was she saying? I don't know. She was just wasted. And then they're like, can you just, can you get them to leave? So she's like, yo, not a problem. So Tammy, like rounds them up and they head to the front door. Oh, I have to say, Shira said something great here. When can you win over to them to tattle tail? Shira was like, well, can you need to make up a mind? Because one minute, can you fling in a vagina clean? And the next, yeah, I just love how she said it. The next, he's threatening. Which is it? Can you? I love her. I love her. Can you sleep with her? You sleep with her? You sleep with her? You sleep with her? Do you like the bobs? So yeah, this definitely escalates really quickly, because Tammy's like, guys, we gotta go. And he's like, what oh hell no, and starts coming. And she's like, and she's like, well, because you were being aggressive. And Glenn's response is to actually start striding towards Kenya and be like, bitch ass, you bitch edit it. Like in a really threatening way. And not only does he do that, well, no, so he starts coming at Kenya. In a very, a lot of times on these shows, there's a lot of crime wolf. There's a lot of like, you know, I did not feel safe. Who'd be that? I did not feel safe. Yeah, yeah, and also just the fighting where it's like, hold me back. I'm going to kill him. But you know, if they're never actually going to, it's like a Vanderpump rules fight, you know. But this one, he was like, he had a look in his eye. Like, I can't believe this woman spoke back to me. And I'm going to put her in her place right now. You know, he was going to get right into her face. I don't know if he was going to punch her or not, but he was going, he was getting mad. So security steps in. And security starts pushing him back. And then he goes out. He goes crazy and they push him back to the door. And then he goes to charge after Kenya again. And Tammy is there also trying to control her nephew. And he literally flings, pushes her to the ground. Like, it's not just like a light thing. He just knocks her over as if it was like. I don't know. That's a super Tammy. I mean, how hard could it be? No, that is. It's just like knocking over Tammy. And the quote I wrote from him is, I ain't going to play a little bit. And then I put grab wiener, grab wiener, grab wiener. It's so funny to me that that's always a fighting thing. Like, you little bitch. And it's like, I'm just going to squeeze my wiener while I yell at you. And then they show Tammy on the ground. And someone's going, I think it's a fajor. I'm assuming it's fajor going. Pour it like a glass. No, me pour it like a glass. These people are awful. And then I wrote these obese guards. Like, thank God for these obese guys. Because no one can even punch him. That guy was, like, cracked out. So he needed, like, walls of things around him, you know? Yeah, walls of man. He was, like, being crushed by bouncy houses. Like, he wasn't being hurt but it didn't move. It's like an inflatable suit, you know? It was like, he got like, he basically, he got basically tackled by the triplet of Bellville. I was just like, whoa. But they show, okay, this is where there's so many, so much funny shit starts to happen. I was dying because everybody on reality shows is ridiculous. It needs a piece of the pie. So Tammy just got pushed down. Plus, she's drunk. Plus, she's dumb as, I mean, goddamn dirt. Let's face it. So she's laying on the ground and then looking. She's like, Tammy, Tammy, come to the light, Tammy. Tammy, come to the light. And she's blinking, like, really slowly. Like, she's about to die. And then they show, like, Simea, and Simea is, like, like, trying to cry. She's pushing so hard. She looks like she's giving birth to the, like, an entire Peter Piper Pipes, a large pie in the toilet. She's like, oh, trying to cry. And then everybody's trying to be dramatic. And then Cynthia. Baedra goes up to the EMTs when they finally get there. And she's like, here's the story with the EMT. Here's the story with her. Oh, yeah. She fell. Oh, she doesn't have a fever. Her wind pipe is clear. I've had a temperature in her anus. She seems to be fine there. Also, she has no wax in her ear. Split in. I might want to look into the split. Like, what are you doing? You're not a doctor. Step down. She's like, I'm not a doctor, but I have watched many episodes of NBC's third watch back in 1999. She's like, crossing Jordan is still on my DDR. So my favorite part was even before the EMTs got there. Like, going to the commercial. You hear, uh, Shiree scream, called ambulance. Ambulance. I wrote down ambulance to you. Get out of the toilet from Mary to medicine. Oh, oh my god. So, um, oh, and also Shiree, and this is going. What do you do though? What do you do? What do you do? What can I do? What can I do? What can I do? What can I do? So it was total disaster. They cart off Tammy, um, and then like, and then this like really ridiculous fight breaks out between Cynthia and, and Kenya, because they're standing there. Like, there's sort of like coming down and Cynthia's, Cynthia's like, she's like, I just feel bad because, um, you know, I brought Tammy to the room. So I feel bad that she's trying to make it. Like, yeah, it's like. Well, Kenya's, well, Kenya was like, well, no, Kenya was like, no, don't do that. Like, don't, like, don't do that. It's not your fault. She actually says, don't do that. It's not your fault. That's what she actually gets. She was, she wasn't even mad. You're just being like, Cynthia, like, don't be yourself up. Like, please, I don't want to deal with you being yourself up. Like, it's not your fault. But she says it in a sort of like a loud, aggressive way. Cause she's, the way I read it is that she's still kind of like emotional. So Cynthia is like, don't tell me what to do. And Kenya is like, I'm not, I'm just telling her that it's just like, well, but I'm just saying, I feel bad. Could you not be saying it so loud? And they just start to fight. I totally differently. Because I took it that she, that Cynthia came up and this whole huge drama happens. And Kenya's trying to cry because Kenny can't cry either. Let's face it. So Kenya's standing there trying to cry and have this dramatic scene of this woman who just almost got beat to death or whatever. And then Cynthia's like, guys, this is my fault. Because I introduced Tammy to the group. And Kenny is like, no, Cynthia. Don't blame yourself. And she's like, no, really guys. She's like, no, seriously, Cynthia. It's like, get the fuck out of my scene with your stupid stuff. We're not going to make up something about Peter right now. And then Cynthia's like, what? Don't tell me you to turn down. And Kenny is like, I need you to turn down right now, Cynthia. You turned down. It's like, no, you turned down. No, you turned down. No, you're going to turn down. You are going to-- I'm going to put you on mute. I'm FN volume downing you muted by turn down, turn down, turn down. It's like, oh my god. You guys keep turning off. The power is just going to go off. You know? The power is going to click off because you're going to go all the way to the bottom of the volume. Yeah. Well, the craziest thing to me happened next. And I was surprised that this was actually a recurring theme for like a good next chunk of the show was Phaedra, then says-- in an interview, she's like, this could have all been avoided if Kenny had just minded her own business. I was like, what? I'm sorry. No, no, no. I actually thought that was extremely offensive, you know? And then this was like a recurring thing, you know, about how, you know, that this guy was irritable. He was drunk, and then Kenny went and started up with him. I'm like, no, no, no, no. I mean, maybe it would have been wise as he was leaving, just to steer clear. But like, you can't-- like, the way they were saying it, it really pissed me off. And actually, I did like a search on-- I just did a Google search on this guy. And a headline came up. One of the top headlines came up from this website, Madam Noir, which is like a pretty well-known website. And it's written by Victoria. OK, I don't-- I can't-- I'm sorry, Victoria. I can't-- I can't pronounce your last name. U-M-R-M-R-O-G. Anyway, really well-written article that people should read, because it's basically saying-- the headline of it, it's basically saying it's Kenya Moore, Glenn Rice Jr. and the problem with only looking out for Black men and not Black women. And it's like, you know, and then the whole article is about how like the women grow their way to kind of almost even let him off the hook. Like, what was he doing wrong? Or Kenya shouldn't have done this, da-da-da-da-da. And it's like, you know, it's really fucked up. It actually really, really upset me. Well, it went way-- I mean, it ended up going further later in the discussion, like, how they were trying to steer this thing, which got really crazy. And Phaedra really went to town being gross in this episode. Yeah, especially being Apollo's wife. Like, your-- last time we saw your husband, he was coming at you with a screw gun. OK, I mean, granted, it didn't have a head in it, because he couldn't find the bolts. I mean, who can never find the screw heads, you know? But he's still. And then yelling and screaming and now he's in prison, you know, he's like, come on, stop. Like, you're going to go on this whole thing like it's the woman's fault. Come on. Yeah. She knows it's not. Now, she's not the only one. Kim feels was doing this too. Kim really surprised. I was actually really surprised that Kim feels was. So because everybody just looks at it through their own who they're mad at. And so anything that happens is going to be Kenya's fault. And normally it is. Yeah, normally it is. It was a drama queen. And she was totally fine with this guy until she wasn't, you know? He was gross from the beginning. So that was kind of my-- I was like, why is he coming to your house when he's snapping at you and acting like that? I get that he's the nephew. But yeah, just it was gross. But Kim got really gross. But Kim didn't hear any of this, you know? Kim's off on the FaceTime talking about canned food. She's feeding her future obese children. Yeah. Well, Kim is basically, you know, her passive aggressive bitch flower comes out. And she's like, well, it was like a volatile situation. And I don't think adding negativity to it helped. That's basically what she said. And then Kenya just kind of snitched. She's like, oh, fuck off, Kim. And Kim's like, okay. And she said it perfectly. Can you said you don't provoke a man into pushing a woman? And then Kim, she said, I don't want any finger pointing. And then Kim tries to mom her. Oh, Kim, this is not a five-year-old. And we said last week, you need to watch a show before you go on it. Because you would know, you do not try and mother someone with mommy issues that deep. Okay, because she's automatically going to hate you. And Kim's got kind of nasty with it too. She was saying, I wasn't finger pointing, dear. I understand you're upset sugar or whatever. She didn't say sugar, but she was very condescending. And then she actually said, you don't go up to a hornet's nest and poke it with the stick. And then you're shocked that hornet's trying to rape you or beat you, and I thought that's interesting because you just did poke a hornet's nest. So I hope you watch this episode and listen to your own advice. Yeah. Well, the thing is this though, humans are not hornets. I mean, I understand the analogy. I understand what they're saying. You know, and again, would it have been smarter for Kenya to just keep her mouth shut? Yes, but she should not be held to a double standard here. I mean, because if she, because if she, but if she, if like, why is it like her fault for talking back to this guy, why are people not saying this guy should have taken the higher road and seen this crazy woman talking and just been like, whatever, peace out, you know, but it's like, it's, you know, when you say like, oh, it's not that it's just any woman. I think they just hear it. They just hear it. And also it's that the problem is Kenya is a huge drama queen and she pauses shit on purpose. Well, that's why you can't cry wolves. Yeah. And she's always running away. So when something real happens, they're just like, oh, you're just being a drama queen. They were sitting over by the pool or the, you know, they were watching, they were in the mom's seats. And so I think they just didn't understand what was happening. And they were like, you're just an overdramatic bitch, period. So, well, no, the mom is like a cry wolf, you know, I think you're right with that. Yeah. I mean, I mean, the thing is with a hornet's nest is that like, you know, hornets, you know, they, it's, you know, it's in their nature, you know, they're going, like someone comes from them in their room. Yeah. But if you stay in them in your yard, you exterminate them. You call the exterminator and you have them killed. And the point is this humans are not hornets. Okay. And humans are capable of saying, hmm, you know, like, maybe I should approach this in a different way. Now, I know when you're drunk, you sort of lose a lot of rational thought, but I don't, I just, it just, it really rubbed me the wrong way that, like, to, to that these women were so quick to actually blame Kenya for this. It's one thing to be like, Kenya should have kept her mouth shut. That's fine. But don't be like, well, this is all Kenya's fault. It never would have happened if Ken, it's like, no, no, this is not Kenya's fault at all. It's ridiculous. Yeah. It was glaringly the other guys. Yeah. Terrible. Like that was a glaring obvious fact. So yeah, exactly. And in fact, in fact, they're, they're all, they all sort of like afterwards, they're all, this is skipping a little bit, but I actually know it's not skipping a little bit, but basically, um, after Kim leaves to go to the hotel, which of course, she was just waiting for something to happen so that way she could pack. I mean, her bag was pretty much packed as it was. Just, like, she goes, Kim threw her mama Keeney up, or her mom Keeney up on the balcony, like five bitches. Yeah, they just like, she roller skated away. And then she does this like, 2D roller skating ballet. These women are nuts. I was going during this part. They were being so funny. Yeah, but then they're doing like the post-game report. And again, like a, a good number of them are like, especially, I think they're being, like led by Phaedra talking about how Kenya, you know, she just adds negativity to situation. No, no, no, no, no. He's drunk. He shouldn't have done that. Like, they just go because they don't like her. They have issues with her. When things like this happen, you know, you pile on. And then when they all are sort of in a room together, and they're sort of trying to broach this thing that it was Kenya's fault. And then, uh, Candy's like, "See, nah, I was there." And she basically says, "No, he came at me. I'm a pregnant lady." And he was being weird. And I saw him being strange and aggressive all night. And, uh, cause, cause they were trying to spin it that like, you know, the thing is with Kenya is that like, if someone doesn't want to play with her, then she has to kick them out. Like, what's going to happen? Like, what's going to happen if, like, like, you know, Tutti is like, "Well, I guess later it was." And she's like, "What's going to happen if she decides she doesn't, you know, she doesn't like me on my rollercoats in 1979, then all of a sudden, I'm not allowed to play with her." I'm like, "No, that's not what it was." It wasn't that people, she was angry that he didn't want to play with her. It was because he was responding in a really nasty way. Yeah, he was, yeah, yeah. I mean, it was so obvious. And I think that they, because once Candy said that, they were like, "Oh, you know, but then Portia, of course, is still trying to stick up for him in a way." She's like, "You can, you can hit a girl, but don't hit a pregnant girl. That's bad. I mean, he was going to hit a girl, but a pregnant girl." It's not that he was being so aggressive. It's that he was being so aggressive with a pregnant woman. Exactly. Obviously, it's worse, but you know what, you don't have to be pregnant for it to be offensive, Portia. But it also, I mean, here's where, here's where Kenya on like a macro level should learn a lesson, which is that, you know, if you do cry wolf over, you know, like the smallest little infraction, then in moments like this, your credibility is shit. And then you need someone like, "She doesn't cry wolf. We're saying it wrong because we are both saying cry wolf. She doesn't cry wolf. She like invents a new breed of animal that doesn't even exist and like tells the entire village about it. And they all build security fences." And it's like the village, you know? She cries crampus. Kenya, I mean, she's just such a fucking liar that nobody believes a thing that comes out of her mouth, including me. Like if I hadn't seen it, it's like the below deck cast. They're like, "Oh, he was totally sexually harassing my way or being a dick in that way." Right. Exactly. So, oh, gosh. Either way. So then things settle down. And then like the next morning, we find out that Tammy and her nephews came back later that night in the middle of the night. And they like recorded that they had this crazy video. And they're like, "All hanging out." And then like, Tammy knocks on the door, the bedroom, and they open up the door. And she looks crazy. She's standing there like she's been possessed. Like she was just was taken away. Pod people came and she's back. And she was in her hospital gown and a bathrobe with her head cocked, just staring. And they were filming this, like, it was a horror movie. And Tammy was narrating it. She's just like, "And Nancy, it's at the door." And they said, "How'd she even get at the gate? Who let her in the gate?" And she goes, "Must have climbed the gate." Well, you know, if anyone is going to be like a horror movie person, it's going to be Tammy, because I could totally see her like walking down a staircase upside down on her hands and legs, you know, like total extraships that I could see that. Cleaning to the ceiling in some weird way. Like that's Tammy, for sure. What's that movie called "Mama"? Or "Mama"? What is it? Where the little orphan children abandoned in the woods, and they have some like devil mother that's like trying to steal it from their uncle's house or something? Is it like crawling like that? Like, crawling in the well. Something "Mama". Isn't it like, play... "Mama." I think it's just "Mama." Oh, just "Mama"? Oh, yeah. "Can you go?" "Girl, this is not children of the corn rolls!" Or "corn rolls." I wrote "corn rolls." My typos are so stupid. What's a corn roll? It's like a cinnabon made out of corn. It's a Texas cinnabon. Corn rolls. Jesus Christ, Rondol. So, phone video of Phaedra doing the horror movie "LOL." All scream at Tammy's face. Best episode ever I wrote. I was laughing so hard. My dad came out and said, "What are you fake laughing about?" I said, "I'm not fake laughing. I'm laughing my ass off." He said, "But it's the same thing over and over." It's like, "That's funny because we're talking about a horror movie here." Oh, yeah. So then the update on Tammy is that she did not have a concussion. She was just drunk. She was drunk. She had the travertine, as Phaedra said. I'm just laughing again about how she was doing it. The first responder, "Please report." It was so funny. My question to Spider in the corner, he didn't see anything that's out of the ordinary. So, I think we're good to go with his body. Oh, so Candy was like, "Bye." So, she left. They all just started leaving so funny. So, this is where it got even darker. Phaedra takes it to an even grosser place here, and this is the next day, I guess, and she's talking with Shirei, and she's making this all about Messy Kenya, and then she says, "You know, that Glen, that could be our boys. What if one of our kids said something in public, and then a cop shoots them?" You know? And then it became this police shooting shit, which has nothing to do with... I was like, "What are you talking about?" You were totally drawing two things together to make a case against Kenya that is just not cool. Yeah, like Kenya could have gotten him shot. Like, what is Kenya doing? She could have gotten him shot. And Shirei says, "Labelling is the problem." And then Phaedra was like, "Yeah, she's like any white woman in suburbia that's afraid." What the hell? So, she's... You're saying that she's racist, because she's assuming the worst about a black angry man, and she's assuming that he's going to attack her. No, bitch, he literally attacked her. This is not assuming. This is not like, cop shot the wrong guy. And in fact... Where everybody across America would say, "Oh, yeah, the cop shot somebody who attacked somebody." In fact, that discussion that Phaedra had with Shirei, if anything, that will make the white racist be like, "See, black people are so sensitive. See, this is what the problem is. Oh, lives matter!" But you know what? So, the Madame Noir article also addressed this. And so, this is what the writer says. She goes, "Phaedra Parks, please, let's not compare him to Mike Brown. I think it's a very serious issue, the misplaced fear of black men. And yes, some people see a threat in young black men that is really just false intimidation, and things escalate in dangerous ways. Police are called, guns are pulled out, lives are lost. But there are also... But there are some situations where that fear is not misplaced, and where some men do things that are truly out of control. As Jody Walker of Entertainment Weekly put it, "We do not need to protect black men, but we also need to protect black women. Just because we're all black doesn't mean that when we feel someone is acting up, we can't ask them to leave, and just hope they'll oblige as an individual with good sense. And just because we're all black doesn't mean that we as women should sit back and take whatever happens to us. What sense does it make to look out for everyone but ourselves?" Yes, I mean, honestly, to me, that's taking it too deep because I think that Phaedra is not even going that deep. She's not even thinking of it is that she's just being a fucking asshole and bringing up national pain and real tragedy and real shit that's happening. I mean, she goes as far as to say, "I was in St. Louis when my friend was humble back, and I saw the look in his mother's eyes, and I just looked at it." And she's not crying. She's doing the typical real housewife, fake pooping, trying to poop or fart or pass a stone cry, and she says, "That could be my kid." You think your kid would ever fucking treat anybody. Little Aiden in his little suit and his little bow tie in his car seat? No, but he is not going to do that because you raised him right. And if you didn't, and he did do that, he would suffer in life. I wouldn't go as far as to compare him to people who were unfairly shot by the police. That is so cold. Yeah, I thought, "I'm so cold, I'm so wrong." Yeah, no, I mean, I think I just brought up the thing that the writer said because what Phaedra doesn't realize, but when she's being an asshole like that, and she's basically humble bragging and saying, "Oh, yeah, I was there. I was one of the few that got to be there during this critical time." But while she's doing that, what she's doing is she's sending out a message to people watching at home, and this is what this writer saying is like, "You know what? Don't do that. Please don't do that because you're saying out this message, and this is what the truth is." It's really, really very frustrating. Yeah, the truth is she would never raise her children like that. So she's making this some political thing, but you don't allow them. You don't let anybody talk to you like that, period. A man or a woman. That is some abusive bullshit. But the fact that these women, Kenya and Portia particularly, just sat there and giggled and just tried to get dick all night from this obviously abusive, awful person. This is before it escalated. I mean, he was really bad, but the fact that they're like, "Who cares? He's hot. Let's fucking." Like, gross. Like, how's some self-respect? What is wrong with you women? Like, what's happening? Believe it or not. Believe it or not. That's why there's men like this because that they get fucking pussy. It's disgusting. Believe it or not. I actually think that like, Shirei and Kenya and whoever else was, and Phaedra, I actually don't think they were trying to sleep with those guys because it was like, "No, Kenya and Portia, that's all I'm saying." Well, Portia had Oliver. Portia has Duke. Portia has whoever's paying for Bentley or whatever. Either way, well, Portia's a different case, but I actually think Portia was focused on Oliver, but you know, the ones who were hanging out with him the most were Kenya and Shirei. And I think they were just enjoying flirting with younger guys, but I mean, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter what their intentions are. The point is, if someone said to Phaedra-- It matters that they're even taking that at all. It bugs me. It bugs me seeing them sit there and giggled like he's so charming and handsome. I don't think they're really going to get his dick. If they want the flattery, that's what I'm saying, we have some self-respect. But then they should have, and along your point is, as soon as they realize that he was an asshole, they should have been like, "Oh, never mind. We're older and wiser. Get off this boat. Goodbye." Yeah, they should be pushing him in the boat. Yeah, exactly. Or some off the boat. You know what I mean. But you know what, though? Get Tammy and her life vest. Let me tell you something. If someone said to Phaedra, "Hey, the only reason why Apollo's in jail is because you were not a better wife, you made him feel like he needed to earn money outside of the marriage because you weren't being good wife and yada yada yada." She'd be like, "Fuck you." And that's the logic that she's applying to Kenya. So it really gets me and gets me going. Yeah, I think the general reason she's annoyed with Kenya is true. But this was an awful, awful episode. Like if we're looking at this, like if this is game counting, bad game episode for her. Really bad. And 2D2 because I get that 2D did not see all of this, but 2D was not an asshole. She was being a real asshole about it. Wow. So it was the wrong time to pick that fight. Yeah, exactly. So either way, so then the girls go off and drive around South Beach on these mini-hummers. The way we have to say, I'm so sorry I'm doing this, Ben, but I just saw this note by the Hummer for some reason. At the end of this scene, it's like this dramatic scene. They talked about the big brother and big sister club and how important that is. And Shreya goes, "I had a big sister. You had a big sister? I was in that club. You on the club?" And Phaedra said, "Yeah, I had a big sister bed." One time she took me to the pool and got my hair wet. And that was it. My mom said, "No more." She cut it off. And then Shreya goes, "They were laughing." And Shreya goes, "My sister was a white girl. You have a sister, white girl." I can't even do it that high because it's so late. You have a weapon. You have a mixed sister, white girl. You have a sister, white girl. You have a sister, white girl? You want to? You want to? There's so fun. I really love that Shreya's back on here. I wonder what she did to not be a full housewife. I know. Other than not get the case to her house yet. I know. I'm so busty out there. They're on these little cars. They go around. And then they're like, they go to like a candy shop and someone's like, "Oh, someone says that Phaedra's like, "Oh, you should, or Portia's like, I want to get this, she's like, I want to get this for Oliver." And Phaedra's like, "Oh, that looks like a phallic symbol." I'm like, "What's that?" I'm like, "Oh, Portia, I just want to pant her." So then they cross-cut this with Kim, who's now at a park with the family in Atlanta. And my favorite is Sebastian. That kid cracks me up. He goes down the slide. I mean, he's his mother's son. He goes down the slide as if he's being ejected from a cruise liner. He's like, "How does this look of fear going down the five-foot slide?" He's like, bracing against the sides of the slide with his hands. He's like, "Oh my God, I'm going down." Oh my God, Kim, it's you. It's your child. I love that Sebastian. I love him. I'll tell you, I love Sebastian and Aiden, two favorite children in Real Housewives. I just wrote that this was hilarious, that Kim had to be back in a public park with children, with a husband wearing khaki mom jeans, mom doctors after his muffin top. It's like, "Oh, good. You can only be comfortable with a man and khaki mom doctors." I'm just imagining her in her paradise. She's like the ball pit at a what's-a-place. It's like 10 cent hot dog night at the Diablo's baseball game in El Paso. Exactly. She's in the little ball pit. But instead of balls, it's all just like, "Shift Boy or Decan's" and SpaghettiOs. She's just throwing them up and diving in amongst them in a fantasy sequence. Swimming around, doing the backstroke through the SpaghettiOs. But there's also the spaceship shapes. It's like, he gets all the special editions and one can. So she starts this, were they at home? I don't know when they started this. Did they go home? Because I write that they're watching. Oh no, they cut it with me. It was a flashback. Yeah, so she's telling her husband all about Kenya. Okay, so you know how she talks about how she doesn't really have sex or whatever. So her, or whatever, wait, what she did. That she's improved, but when she does have sex, she's like a screamer. Oh, okay. Well, her husband is very katty and I love it. She's married to, like, he's stealth catty because he's in like mom doctors. But then he says shit like, they're what they show a clip of them watching Kenya's pilot. And he goes, she needs to be recast. Like, he's so funny. And he makes bitchy little comments all the time. I love it. I know. He's they're very funny because they were they're talking about it because, you know, she was talking about Kenya and he's like, it sounds like he's she's pretty devious. And Kim's like, yeah, which is true. Regardless of this incident, it's true. They have the right read on her. And so Kim's like, yeah, I don't know if I want to, I don't know if I want to be in business with her. And Kim is actually pretty funny. She's like, you know, if she brought me Game of Thrones, I'll put up with it. But she did. That's what she basically said, paraphrasing. I'm trying to imagine what that would have been for Kim, like that Game of Thrones. Like, what was that Game of Thrones moment for Kim? Like, is she still waiting for Game of Thrones? Yeah, she couldn't get that. I think she's she's probably at the best thing to get blues clues. Blues glue, the HBO version of blues. It's all. Yeah. They'll never figure out the mystery. And that's the point of blues glue. Like fuck you, Damon, a little off. That's not the end of the mystery or what's his name, Steve or Jeff? What's the name of the guy on blues clues? I don't know. I couldn't watch it. Show. I was like, blues. That's depressing. Clues. I've got murder. She wrote pass. They just chop off his head. Like HBO presents blues clues. Blues clues got a drug addiction and never got the job. So it's just blues. The dog is just basically has like big hair and takes a little blonde girl as his wife is getting dark. Well, that's that's all I've seen of Game of Thrones. Basically two episodes. And at one point, there's like a basically one that maybe like yo gaba gaba is like all the kids are dancing. And then one of the kids gets pushed out of tower. Oh, that was good. Oh, that's a show worth watching. I mean, a show that pushes children off towers. And that was a handicap trial, too. They really went there in that show. Oh, no, that's how he became handicap. Oh, you guys, this is how my memory is. Spoiler alert. If I have Game of Thrones in my head now is really going to explode blue. Blue is actually a dire wolf. That's what the expression is. The dire wolf. Well, those things do a lot of good, don't they? They get you places, but everybody still dies. Thanks a lot, wolves. So speaking of, they get people places, but everybody dies. Portia. Okay, so what is this little scene of them giving Portia cootie juice? What is cootie juice? What was she going to put up her vagina? You know, with big wireless providers, what you see is never what you get somewhere between the store and your first month's bill. The price you thought you were paying magically skyrockets with Mint Mobile, you'll never have to worry about gotchas ever again. I mean, how many times have you felt like, oh, this has been such a great deal. And then at the end of the first month, you're like, what just happened? Yeah, you look at the charges. It's like, I agreed to a certain amount. 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Get free shipping on qualified orders. See site for more details. Well, I think I missed this scene. I think at this point, I think I like stepped into my kitchen briefly to do something because I did not see the coochie juice. It was one of those little scenes in between the commercials. Oh, I missed that entirely. And she was getting ready for her date and she's like, you guys, you guys want to see my coochie? No, no, we don't know. Come on. And they're in the she's in the bathroom putting her leg up. And then someone's like, we got you some juice. And she's like, what do I do with this juice in my coochie? Yeah, some juice for your coochie. And then they laugh and I'm like, what are they talking about? Did she put the juice up her coochie? Now there's a clue. Blue? What was in the coochie juice blue? Nick Jr. has really taken a turn. So this show went from being the funniest episode of all time to just everybody sleeping the next day during dinner. They're making dinner and cooking and just being really nice to each other. And it gets so boring that Kenya actually says, Hey, guys, the reason we're here is for Cynthia. Cynthia, it's a Peter trip. Do you want to talk about Peter? Oh, good. And so Cynthia like makes the effort to call Peter. And she's like, Peter, this is Cynthia plan on getting some tomorrow. He's like, okay, babe. Things are going to be okay. I'm going to start up the Mr. Coffee. I mean, the Peter's room machine is broke. The Peter's Keurick, the Peter's drink. Be prepared to get some tomorrow. Oh my god. Start doing the helicopter at 9am. She'll be in my six. So then yeah, so they're they're basically all making a dinner like a relaxed dinner and Cynthia burns the garlic bread. But my favorite part about that is that Shire goes, Cynthia, what's that spell? Cynthia, what's that spell? She just says it so fast. We were in the garlic friend. She goes, it's just good. Now let's all cuddle on the mattress on the floor and eat that burnt garlic bread. Yeah. And then meanwhile, Portia is basically she's basically resurrected the show blind date. All that was missing was the talk bubbles. And she was she and Oliver were at some bar and he's saying the stupidest things. He's like, oh, you guys must have been up talking it. You like trying to talk a bit of gossiping. You must have been talking gossiping. She's like, Oh, she's like, I would have it. He's like, I would love to see you do a squat. She's like, these lines are awful. The fire lounge. She says, you met me on the peculiar circumstances. Like, do you even know what you're saying? A peculiar circumstance. We're slow motion ham flapping. Of course it was peculiar. Who taught you that word? But you hear that. And it's not peculiar, peculiar, peculiar girl. And then she starts talking, she's like, I do some squats by the pool. And he's like, I love squats. Maybe you do some squats right now. I'm like, you're embarrassed now. Now you're embarrassed. She's the mirror girl. And she says, I won't be squatting on anything. Oh, I mean, and then he goes when Oliver goes in for a kiss. And then Porsche is like, uh, and she like pushes him off. I was like, this is, I mean, this was, I wouldn't have a zero splash. This is the end of 2015. And I'd like to ring in this new year, letting everybody know that now opening your ass cheeks. And she actually did like an a hole massage at them at one point. Massaging your corn hole to new people in a hot tub is now, um, more innocent than kissing someone on the lips. What the hell, Porsche? Well, what kind of rules are those? Listen, there's a rules well established by Julia Robertson 1990 with pretty woman. Okay. Oh, does not kiss. Absolutely. Don't you know? Don't you know? And then she remembered. She's like, I don't want to be a host. So she kissed him. And, uh, and then Roger Lodge came on and everything wrapped up. And then Jason Alexander tried to boner at some horse event. Oh, yeah, poor Julia, but Porsche's no Julia Roberts. She's like, I don't kiss. I do swallow. Yeah. But you know, I have lines. All right. So then there was like a really boring scene with Todd and his daughter, which I just wrote Todd's daughter, whatever. Todd plays pool. Next. I like her hair. I like Kayla's hair. It's cute. It's very big. And I like it. Very full head of hair. Next. So then, um, Kim was so now Kim and Kenya meet and, uh, Kim is walking to the restaurant. She starts to sneeze. And I was pretty surprised that she just did not go home right then and they're like, Oh no. Oh no germs germs going home. Going home. There's such dicks on this show. I love that they put that in. Every little awkward thing with Tootie, they stop the music. And it's like Tootie walking all confidently down the street. And then she goes, and then the music starts again. And she walks confidently. And then they intercut that with Kenya yelling at the construction guys. It's like, what do you mean? This isn't finished yet. How have you not finished? When I'm on film sets, I've worked 16 hours a day. I'm like, no YouTube movie shoots for 16 hours a day. Shut up. Nobody believes you. There's no union for that Kenya. So then they sit and they have their lunch and the waiter scene. The waiter was so nice and he looked like he didn't want to be on camera. So I approve. They had nothing at that restaurant. They were just like, can I get a, can I get like a vodka ton? And she's like, Oh, sorry, we don't have our liquor license. And Tootie's like, can I get a cranberry juice? He's like, sorry, even I have cranberry juice either. So you don't have your cranberry license? I love that Kim's got some cranberry juice jokes saved up for a rainy day. Kenya really can. So they're being really nice to each other. And Kenya, the queen, she was like, girl, you look so beautiful. And then it cuts to Kenya going really, Kim, don't try that fake shit with me. And then it comes back to the table where Kenya's like, Kim, I love you. And then she says, I may have sensed that you were a tad bit uncomfortable on the trip, Kim. Yeah. And then well, and she was like, you know, I saw you were torn between us and your kids and your husband. And then he comes like, Whoa, whoa, no, no, I wasn't torn. I just, you know, I want to be someplace where I feel safe and I didn't feel safe there. So I left. Okay. And it's like, okay, so but you, so you, but you want to go back to you. And she's like, no, no, I just want to be safe. Yeah. And she's like, you, you just manufactured drama. And I don't want to be around that. And she's like, there were no, there were no seat belts. And I feel very uncomfortable being with a group of people with no seat belts on. I really don't appreciate everybody heading to the hot tub like that. You're supposed to wait in a line and then move very slowly and single file, get into the hot tub. And someone you can't get in until that other person's out. So it's called carpool. I was very concerned that there was no Aladdin seven on this throwing on TV. And I just felt like things were gonna get very unruly very quickly. So I had to leave. You guys were trying to turn up. I wanted a fruit roll up. So that's where the difference is. Here's the thing. I wanted to stay. But at the same time, we just got a new copy of Madagascar. And I really need to see it to catch up. I'm just, I'm really into the Madagascar universe right now. And so, you know, it's a big deal. I'm gonna do a marathon before the night comes out. And Kim is still momming her. She's just so passive aggressive. It's so good. Let me be clear, sweetie. When you provoke somebody, that's not something I'm gonna take part in. And Kenny is like, that was not the case. I don't like I'm a hero. I saved everybody. We could all be dead right now. We would all be dead in the streets. I'm a hero. No, you started it. Well, it was weird. I mean, Kim is so condescending to because she was like, she's like, well, actually, I was there. And that's just not what happened. That's not what happened. But I'm like, Kim, you saw him say, get a give attitude to to to candy. You saw he was aggro. So like, it was, it was a little surprising things that it was that. And then Kenya, Kenya added onto it. Yeah, I don't think she saw because she didn't see that fight and stuff that was going on inside. Did she? She did. She was too deep during that. She was standing up to the side. She's like, walk watching through like her bedroom slash living room. Oh, so she heard all that stuff with him going crazy and then getting in the bouncy house of prison, the bouncy house prison. What is she standing up for? Never mind, I take it back. Yeah, she was there. She saw it. I think I'm so stupid. I thought that she was like a sleeper. I'm so sorry. I always think two days like a sleeper face timing in the attic. I don't even know. She's in the scene. I'm like, 2D couldn't have known about this. She wasn't your boss. She was somewhere reading a story to herself. No, she was there. Everyone was there. I mean, how could you not be so stupid? Phasing. Phasing this. Okay, then I don't feel for her. 2D, you're dumb. So then 2D says she holds fast. Kenya really holds that she's a stubborn young lady. And those are her truths. So I just have to say that there's the truth. And those are her truths. I'm like, oh, no, no, you're in so much trouble now on Twitter. Yeah, I haven't even read it, but I already know. Yeah, she'll be in trouble. So then we saw the scenes for next week. And I nearly broke out into tears when they showed the clip of Phaedra taking aid in to kindergarten, his first day of kindergarten. And she's like, your first day of kindergarten goes, I'm still going to be your baby. And she was like, I know you'll be my best baby. I was like, you're my baby. Also something really, really huge happens next week. Peter spills a drink. They should have Cynthia and Peter having dinner and it goes long on the thing. And then the music goes, really? That's a scene right there. Peter spilled something. Even more importantly, Don Juan, he goes crazy about something and he's doing that thing. He was basically doing a full on cart. I always say he's the cartoon cat. Cartoon cat getting angry, stomping his foot and like pushing his arms down and creating a little dust storm. And he's like yelling at all the women and then Portia's like, oh, Don Juan just has his panties in a bundle tonight. His pink panties. Yeah, his pink panties in a bundle. That's exactly right. His pink panties in a bong now. Yeah. Oh, Don Juan, calm thyself. Sootheen. Sootheen. 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Yeah, although I like the idea that if you go on to texture and for the very best reads, it's just a bunch of people just reading people. It's like, whoa, there's Portia. So anyway, with full access to the top magazines across the country, just about every interest that you can imagine texture is the one present your boo is going to open again and again or your family member for your friend. I don't need you to buy it for me because I can buy it myself. I just support me for how business is the best part is that texture is offering my listeners a free trial right now and guess who else's listeners? Ben's mind you mind you go to texture.com/crapins that's texture.com/crapins even better gives texture as a gift between now and December 31st. Think about that. You'll gain unrestricted access to the world's best magazines from back issues to the one on newsstands today. How lucky are you? Order this fantastic gift for your loved one before December 31st, improve the year. 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Better not give me a regular magazine no no whoa you want to get me a paper people you better don't get me a paper people I have a texture she has a texture I can read time magazine she can read time magazine so like we say texture boom boom boom boom texture click click click click push pop pop pop up you did it texture whoa whoa texture well try texture for free right now when you go to texture.com/corapans and that'll do it for texture and thank you texture and thank you everybody for reading that texture actually is a good app and I appreciate having it actually yeah like all this all this all our ads all our sponsors over the past you know month or so I am like a big fan I have to tell you well they're not our sponsor oh I actually mentioned this last week's nevermind let's talk about the sweater again no need no need no more sweater talk no more sweaters so that we know that this is going to be a beautiful episode of Vanderpump rules when it opens with scenes from last week of Lisa sing la la be nice to be nice to la la it's like oh Merry Christmas to us all yeah I love it I love when Lisa makes us love lollar lollar so the episode opens and we're still at the homeless lunch they're still they're still eating that's why you don't throw homeless people lunches they do not go home okay they're always that you can't just say go home homeless people girl well that's a that's exactly what they do they're like thank you so much for coming now be gone you do well to leave now actually some really big news the top of the show which is that channel has taken in long for the post office Lisa was like here could I go to post office I was like okay Lisa would trust you to do that oh my god she should be on our podcast her accent is just as good as she's like I'm already taking it to post office I paid 25 cents and open up the glass thing and put it in the mailbox like no she know you put it in the New York Times box not the post office box like every there's like there's like so many rooms in that damn restaurant they're always in a different corner of it like I can't get any you know I've been to sir several times now and I still have no special idea of how you know why because Lisa has decorated with those giant doors that you buy in like garden centers in Morocco it's like heavy castle doors like wooden doors that you can't even break there with a you know whatever what do you call barricade yeah yeah no nice barricade I know not know what I mean I know it's like I'm gonna go to all the villagers yeah the RAM so she's got those all over and I think now that I think about it she's using those as transformative sets it's like just turn the garden door this way leave it against that wall this time it's different the restaurant actually has the restaurant actually has a swing set it's amazing yes it's like fly systems all right fly in the other part all right where is the scrim where is the scrim all right in front of the scrim all right for the next scene lights behind the scrim boom we're in a different area of the restaurant all right make it happen Ken and you thought this you thought this patio is only this big but guess what lights behind the scrim it's that's big Dan could you tell me where to find the bathroom I can't seem to find it again it's always been moving you have to go through you have to go through the Moroccan castle doors and then make it left at the French garden doors they've moved and then go through the what a picture filling station you should see a busboy and perhaps two waitresses there and then go past the two waiters and waitresses having sex I want to see the call of seat for this show you know it's like all right we need 12 crew people and two cameraman by the ice machine yeah all right like the ice machine so they're like in this this nook and then and Shuna is bragging about the envelope she gets to mail and Ariana walks in she's all huffy and Ariana has not taken a page out of Shuna's book and she's like Peter thinks he's going to put together a guy's trip to Vegas a day after my fucking birthday not for bed a day after your birthday that someone goes on a trip somewhere I know you know how I feel I've been able to invite people to another wedding she's like I can't believe you would do this the day after your birthday in the same two months span as my birthday I can't believe they're gonna drive right by Azusa and not even invite me so you drop by Azusa to get to Vegas all roads late the resers are they do I've never noticed that we're stopping in Azusa next time we go bang chicks and Vegas bro yeah Ariana blames Peter and Jack's poor Peter you know he got his haircut short so now at this point he just looks like he has Kristen Shaw's haircut right it's like exactly Kristen Shaw's haircut some sort of like like you know like woman in her early 40s little slight perm to it you know it's not the mom cut it's not the like when you just not quite a mom cut and the baby start pulling your hair I mean that's just horrible my poor sister was like missing clumps and then you cut it because you have to you have to get mom hair it's like a necessity or get your hair pulled out so it's not that but it's like the I've been a mom and now I'm a carefree fabulous mom whose children are at school all day yeah exactly exactly and my mom who's not getting barfed on right now so yay me it's like free mom you know yeah exactly it was definitely a minivan haircut regardless but um the best is that the best of that like a minivan number three almost down to a nice not compact but maybe a sedan or something yeah you know what it is it's like a it's like a mom haircut for sort of like what you said the kids have now gone to school and now she's the mom's getting back into the workplace a little bit maybe and now she's getting a little letting it grow out a little bit but still being sensible exactly because those kids will still pull your hair 13 meters like they don't have to be a baby to pull your hair so um so so Peter and jacks are asking for permission for Lisa to go to Vegas and my favorite part was when Lisa's like jacks you impregnated a good in Vegas and they do it they do a flashback to jacks telling saucy that he cheated on her with a girl in Vegas and they just held that flashback you know for a few seconds they just show saucy like she just starts like whimpering and they could have cut away like five seconds earlier but they're like no let's watch saucy cry they were so evil and she's crying in this big dramatic scene and she's got this gigantic statement necklace that's made out of like Allison wonderland fucking mirrors they're huge you're huge statement necklace your statement is it you're broke stop crying and get the work oh first of the days god saucy why did you ruin yourself last season why did you do that who does that so i love a self-destructive waiter stassie self-destructive life is gonna please me for all time because i'll be able to watch it on insta thanks internet well um the funny thing is then the guys are talking telling Lisa who's going and they're like yeah it's gonna be it's gonna be us and sandoval and Schwartz and she what why are you she just got out of rehab and you're gonna take him to Vegas oh my god it's just i mean you can't make it up you don't take an alcoholic to the dollar island a target darling you have some sense about you jack because i'm never gonna get married she goes i have a big shocker there jack says i'm gonna get married oh wow what a shock next you're gonna tell me you're not eligible to donate you know it's darling when you die we knew jack's we knew darling all right water on table 15 darling oh and also on your way back to the kitchen remind faith what table 15 is what you're saying while over elsewhere in the restaurant uh la la la is manning the host hostess podium and james comes over he's like hello i just want to say hi and you know hi and you know well james it's like morning and james has not done anything yet and i think he slept two hours because he looks very fresh face yeah and i buried in a nice house and his his eyes look normal i was like oh he's pulling it off today um it's a good one day at a time buddy and he comes in he's like hello hello this is more awkward than i thought there y'all looking at me here i am looking at you look at that hello look at that you know if you've been a basic bitch you're an intricate bitch today hello head and enjoy this awkward moment honey all right because the last one you'll get honey girl i'm getting out of this awkward moment i'm gonna spit on this awkward moment i'm gonna spit on your podium girl but of course at the end of the day sober or not he's a drama queen through and through and says but i would be having fun but everyone's going to everyone else that that not me then are you going mate it's so but like hipster bullshit anyway everyone's going to be standing around the skinny jeans he's not wrong you know he's not wrong don't have any lenses that work in them you know a bouncy house and a bunch of vaping idiots stunning i'm like yes you're absolutely right but you totally want to be there like you just described yourself skinny jean yeah when he called when he called it uh the complete silver like hipster bullshit he was exactly right but you're but you're also right that he's just mad because he didn't get invited so somehow by both being shunned lala and james rekindled their spark and he asks her out and she's like fine but you have to buy the drinks you have to buy everything you have a lot of y'all have making up to do i was like way to stand strong you're a lala way to stay strong yeah i mean i didn't get invited to Ariana so i should just be a basic bitch and then i'd be invited to the unicorn party well lala is basically like i came onto this show to be famous and all the famous people don't want to hang out with me so well does this mean i won't be famous so she's freaking out inside she's freaking out she's freaking out and then we skip over to Ariana and rom which is tom but i can't spell things uh and they're going over who she's gonna invite to her a bouncy house party and he's like i ain't gonna invite kristan kristan she on the evite is she on the super secret password protected evite that you have is she on the paperless posts she knows like did someone say post office because i have to go there so funny because lisa gave me something so it's sort of like i'm not doing paperless posts like i'm doing paper posts huh you know lisa's giving her like hash to send her friend in morocco or some shit this is making her do all of her illegal stuff this is for morcy thank you for the plane here's a bundle of money darling all right wear a mask go down to the post office put it in don't use your hand styling at least use your apron or something i don't want fingerprints or anything if anyone asks you who sent you here tell the manky did it send this to the horse send it to a liars it's it's hush money for the horse lisa's this horrible villain the whole time we find out she's the one who's been bullying hanky the whole time yeah breaking hanky's like did you say that a couple of weeks ago who time he has one chazen she's like i don't know i think maybe it started out as depression but now maybe it's something else hanky i don't know i just don't know hank is breaking his own legs calvarager just like you know when i was a kid i used to always get so sad when i'd go swimming and then i realized it's because my mom died maybe that's what's happening with hanky hanky are you depressed calvarager's one was a swan one time when my mom died i got so sad that i was just like waiting around pools and then i would dunk my head under every once in a while and see if i could find any wet bread to eat maybe that's what's going on with hanky maybe it's just sad you know when my mom died i would just walk around shallow ponds and sometimes that if there was a bridge i'd get up on the bridge and shit on it maybe that's what's going on with hanky hanky did you hear that did you understand what car said is that you i literally have no other examples of what swans do so i'm gonna have to end this i'm gonna have to call this one what else do they do they attack humans oh no we have to hold that for shester because they go duck herding and they also meet vultures and uh the vultures try and eat through and pikas boot so we'll save the bird and my god he's like whoa whoa whoa which is like pick pick pick pick pick no actually she's with laurin and laurin's like a vulture no disgusting i love animals if they look cute like sweeter but vultures don't look cute like it's eating through your butt and then pikas like a mocha snack mocha snack so they're making these invitations and Ariana is kind of being a shady bit she's not inviting certain people which is so funny it's my niece's birthday and there there's this huge drama over who's getting invited because if you don't invite all the kids it's like so political yeah they're just little kids and then you know that's then i watch this so he's talking about this boy's trip and she gets so pissed and she's like it felt like a kick in the stomach like yep just like jax's pregnant girl felt the last time they were in vegas if a girl senses that she's about to get kicked in the stomach in vegas by this group she's actually got very good instincts so i can't hate Ariana even though she's being a bitch yeah i mean my instinct would be to say Ariana is being over the top but then my experience with this show is that every year they go to vegas and they bone some chicks so yeah i can understand why she's pissed now yeah it's basically like he's asking for an open relationship on her birthday yeah yeah that pretty much sums it up yeah i would say so so then we go over to tom and katie tom number two and and uh katie and katie has done her hair i mean poor katie i feel like katie is giving up you know she's not doing anything crazy anymore you can see she's in nesting mode i don't know i i feel like i feel like katie there's so i feel like i want to like light up light something under her ass to do something exciting i want to hug her it's like a little bit of a lump well i want to hug her because she's spent like two and a half hours doing that we for whatever that hair that aquanette masterpiece that was on her head for this scene about basically her boyfriend sitting on her once again and it just makes you want to like hug her but also then when i'm done turning her around and pushing her slowly towards the door and then opening the door and closing it behind by katie don't call sina call sina katie's at the post office waiting for sina like oh my god you're here too she's like yeah i just got here meanwhile she's been there for two hours waiting for to show up which blue box is the right blue box can i mail it says you need to have a stamp so i have one on my bus does that mean i can i can mail this now i was trying to show the lady behind the counter the stamp on my back but she said infinity symbols don't pay for a man when they said do you want it to be priority mail i just showed my tattoo and said it's all happening it's all happening so good oh sina what is happening i have a question now all seriousness what is happening with the tattoos on katie is she always had all those tattoos yeah she's yeah she's had them yeah late-term tattoos are a cry for help has she always had that woman tattoo on her uh wrist or i think so i could be the other side of your wrist the other side yeah yeah no she's had she's had those i think her little nose piercing is relatively new that's that's a surprise development she's going slightly goth her hair is getting darker maybe her tattoos are becoming more prominent tattoo on her wrist is of uh it looks like from scooby dew the one that always were a turtleneck and was a lesbian what was her name with the glasses linda cartilini no the real scooby dew the cartoon uh velma or some velma yes it's like a tattoo of velma and then she's got some other tattoo on her underarm jiggle who does that i've never seen an underarm jiggle tattoo i mean underarm jiggle pride you know go for it girl maybe i'll go and show that shit off we're saying on their changes every year what's all happening that's what we're as i get older and chunky with a tattoo source to have pieces on it's a happy name guys isn't it strange how male works it's like all happening at all times like i put a letter in a box now it's like oh my god i didn't know how real my tattoo wasn't till right now it's all happening the postal employees like ma'am could you please move aside but it's all happening did you not hear me i'm wearing lingerie and i have a new name it's all happening it's all literally literally this envelope has padding in it literally this is the most comfortable envelope i've ever used like that's all happening this is why the people who work at the male office the post office are so miserable they deal with idiots like this whole day they're not born that way okay they deserve some respect because they have to put up with the lowest of the low of us every some girl coming in and lingerie with a new name trying to tell all the strangers about her problems in line for Elvis stamps you guys literally the craziest thing just happened i went to the post office to buy some stamps and the ones that gave me are good forever like literally my stamps will never expire i've gotten infinity a stamp so i can be melt anywhere forever for free if they're all happening literally last time i was having american flag on them like literally they're from washington like this is really important a bama it's all happening i don't like that they have to weigh me every time i'm giving shit someplace literally you guys like i feel really honored because my male just got certified literally literally it's sort of like i can't remember like i'm so proud of my male then the birthday party starts and you know people are arriving and peter has a big announcement because uh on the sky's trip to vegas they're all gonna go to this like real-life sandbox and he just he just goes to shore she goes dude bulldozers she was like yeah like you know you could get a job as a construction worker you know you know you're not little kids anymore you could just like walk down to like any of the construction you're also both really old bartenders and probably will need to learn construction soon so take notes you can go down this path if you want to do it every single day katie starts lecturing peters new girlfriend while she's doing she knows her and she's like you know what sara like it's just kind of bad because peters having this like boy's trip and it's like really not fair to us and the girl's like uh-huh yeah i know she's like yeah you know i'm glad you know because it's like almost just like respectful like and i mean i just don't appreciate it and then it comes to the guys it's an adult bulldozer sandbox tom number two yeah man i saw it on youtube you guys are 40 right i'd like to see them walk up to like a highway crew okay i'm be like whoa like steam rollers whoa and watch these guys giving the dirtiest look ever like i'm getting paid you know twelve dollars whatever an hour and i have to sit here on the side of the highway almost getting hit by a car every day and you guys are sitting here at you know like well peters the one who actually works out of that whole group so he probably actually got their jobs doing something on the side of the freeway and he's like guys it's a trip to Vegas that's what i was thinking it reminded me of the episode you don't watch rest development there's there's a there's an episode where uh jobe as like he shows up to like the club and he's dressed in a certain way where he looks like a waiter and so someone like gives gives an order like oh can you can you bust like table three and so he does it as like a joke and then they just assume he's a an employee and he keeps on thinking that they're all joking but he basically does a day's work so i could imagine these guys be like yeah cool bulldozer and they've actually just like just enlisted in the first time that they've done a job well wow well you have actually built a freeway los vegas thanks you so by the way something that i thought was noteworthy and obviously the editors did too because they stopped the music at this birthday party everyone did like shots and shade they like they then they show shade taking a shot i was like oh darling and then he goes and the music starts again they did that to shade a couple of times this episode he's the kind fields of the show they're like it was me prophetic hilarious oh yeah good to see that recovery really working so well so far ready to go she know you really you turn them around the girls are sitting around talking during the party she was like yeah i felt that i had about blah blah because i was really mean to her first but i'm like when she's still high for herself against both guys i was like oh my god i work actually do i work right i mean sorry fast because you you started working at the same time as not she's like oh i was going there with me thought was the week that she was like an alcoholic i really wound up to la la yeah let's jump in the pool to show how much we've warmed up to la la by the way the party really bothered me like you know everyone's like the most epic adult kids party ever i'm like oh you know i really hate twee shit like that like oh my god let's pretend we're kids like i get it i get why it's fun for certain people like i get that idea like oh my god it's like everything i love from my youth like bouncy castles yada yada yada but i'm like it's just it's like i'm not into that like it's just it's just nothing for me like i was i started watching master of none in the first episode like it's a bouncy castle yay i'm like no like i mean like i'll get in a bouncy castle let's say cool i'll get in one but i'm not gonna be like yes best party ever it's funny when they're making the being the kid part the ironic part but she's having the party at her friend's mom's house in the backyard get out of here you're still a child this isn't ironic enough yet too soon darling too soon so anyway then um Schwartz tells katie that yes he is going to Vegas and she starts to cry and then uh then katie starts on what does he call it hey mama's what does he say he's like he calls her boo boo yeah you know i feel like tom isn't like prioritizing me like tom seriously gets a dog that he talks too nice to the new so he can ignore you what part of this aren't you getting yet katie yeah i know it's like there've been four seasons katie like no yeah tom does not prioritize you congratulations and then she does her four-year-old pout thing like she's crying cadence my niece does it all the time cracking up over here watching these kids because if she doesn't get attention for two seconds like mmm i mean i mean to me i mean to me and then if you don't pay attention to her she comes back check let's play like because she didn't get the attention and that's totally what she did she did this pout and she's like it's just i'm the one i'm always bending yeah i've been sometimes my ankles have touched my ears in vegas me okay i'm not pouting anymore you son of a bitch mmm speaking pouting so then katie and ariana's are talking about the vegas thing whatever and ariana starts crying you know she starts getting all fussy like oh gosh but then it turns out that she's crying because her dad died two years ago and the birthday birthday is always a reminder of her dad she gets very sad about it and she wanted tom to be around which you know i get that and uh she goes he was a norcal hippie surfer you know the kind of guy you think would live forever and i'm like mmm nothing to me about that says he's gonna live forever yeah a norcal hippie surfer you either gonna have a heart attack from too much weed get eaten by a shark get run over walking across a freeway to the p you know to the fucking beach know how to dangerous life yeah he was a competitive eater who loved having burgers at every meal i thought he was gonna live forever it's not weird i know but um uh yeah so she starts crying katie's like you're pretty unicorn you're not supposed to cry on your birthday he's like that's that's an interesting quote taking out of context um and then they celebrate her birthday you know birthday cake time and it's silly string a silly string attack so they talk her with silly string so there's this poor girl like literally poor by the way i mean standing in the middle of room like adult party in her borrowed mom's house covered in you know it looks like she's just been to a bukaki party when her boyfriend's going to vegas the next day i was like this poor girl nothing's working out this year i hope she's not sitting at home crying right now yeah um so then my favorite moment of the entire episode came uh it's nighttime now still at the party tom pools katie aside and sits down with her and uh it's really an area on it tom an area i'm sorry i'm sorry tom an area and you know like please don't let tom talk to katie gonna take it so i guess i got this beautiful lighting it has just like a very intimate scene and Ariana we've you know we've learned that she has some trouble sometimes you know letting down her garden being vulnerable so she lets down her garden she's vulnerable and she talks about her dad and her dad would always recite this speech this Lou Gehrig's speech you know this time you know the birthday you know it's still really hard for her it's still very raw and you know you know she has these attachment issues that she really is like she's crying it's this thing and tom's looking at her and he's like maybe he's like he goes he's he looks at her he nudges himself he steps comes a little closer and clasps her hand he goes like i'm always going to be here for you and it's like a slight pause he goes but apparently he told me that they were that we're going to a construction yard and we're taking bulldozers and crushing shit with bulldozers and then her face completely just stops the crying and everything and she's like really she just it she just stares at him and then he stares at her almost be like like why are you not you know being like excited for me yet like there's gonna be you know bulldozers crashing shit and bulldozers oh that was so funny babe i want you to know i'm not going anywhere just Vegas i mean look i'm always gonna be here for you just not tomorrow through friday okay because of it to be in vegas probably with my penis and a whore can't you be happy from me babe she's like uh did you hear my dad's story right now because i know babe i know your dad died and everything but bulldozers bulldozers seriously bulldozers like i look like bulldozers i look like a community theater actress and whatever happened to baby jane covered in cum and you're telling i have glitter under my eyes and i just told you my dad that's great now i do think the cynic and me things that actually those it was like some editing that happened i don't think that he probably went from i'll always be there for you but there's gonna be bulldozers maybe he did i don't know it's still he's on banner pump rules never give anybody the benefit of the doubt when they're on banner pump rules but the best was honestly it was like after he said that the blank stares from both of them i mean she's just staring at him like what the fuck and he's like yeah so so good so the boys all start driving to vegas the drive to vegas tom farts in the car i mean what what with them sometimes i read my notes for this show and i'm like what what am i right what do i need to write that down tom number two farts in the car yeah jacks it smells like his apartment it's like oh good with this show and um then uh then uh thomas saying i never really give an area on it a reason not to trust me so and then jacks says well i seem to remember a reason uh from miami uh uh miami instagram and then they cut to we had sex no we didn't yes we did no we didn't yes we did no we didn't uh huh not sex we had sex we had sex we had sex uh no we didn't cut down we had sex we had sex we had sex it's my favorite favorite moments and then tom says he's not going to be controlled some by some woman like shay i mean every time you even ask shay a question she not answers for him and it makes him crazy like oh god Ariana is too intelligent to answer for you don't worry she'll let you do your own answering um fart fart Lisa you were doing part okay so then uh meeting with lisa which of course is about uh gossip because gather how do you feel about your boyfriend so it's like nice rest no wonder your service sex yeah but i also like that someone asked Ariana why she cuts her wallet it lalas like why do you hang on i'm like i'm in the middle and you want this like limes i need someone to cut my line someone cuts my line to save time this is so funny it's like so i don't have to do it every time but what i didn't understand is that like you're doing it you're doing it now you're still doing i i don't know what do you mean well she's cutting she's making this stuff in the line right so that way she can put them on the side of a glass right so right so she's like i don't want to do it every time i'm like but you you still have to do it you're still doing it she means you're she's slicing it down the center of the line before she cuts it uh the other way so that they already have a slit in the middle yeah so she's not cutting it twice lala where are you cutting your lams in the middle hello lala's never been in a restaurant like the back of her restaurant she's saying what is this place with all these hot machines it's a kitchen darling so they make the food lala you think it comes from why is there fire coming from the table it's a stove lala wow the Saudis just have these little tugboats come up with some dominoes on it i've never seen anything like this this is insane i knew my mama i knew my mama mama uh so then the waitress lala wasn't invited why wasn't lala invited to a party naryana's like it was my family she's like well i didn't want to invite everyone everyone because it's like my thirtieth birthday i'm like you invited 80 people she's my family you know and faith and like you know the their person from the post office that she met and she's like i'm not like a lot of people but she had all night like i bring threes well she's like being serious like she didn't invite a blah blah um she was cracking me up because she was trying she's trying to be so nice in front of lisa and then lala's playing such a victim she's like but you invited faith and she started working here at the same time as me so she's like yeah but like it was a party about the 80s and you gotta have faith so get off my ass bitch leave me alone in front of lisa mrs like well it's no fun to be the only one not invited to a party i remember when brandy had a party at chucky cheese and was the only one not on the evite and it hurt her deep and then and then you know ariana's like you know i remember like showing up it's you know at school a monday and finding out about part i wasn't invited to and it really you know it really hurt so i don't want to make her feel like that but i just did lisa is really good with giving advice darling you know with them they start talking about vegas hold on i just like i don't want i just like the wrong thing i just like the noise you just made darling darling why would you let your men go to vegas you know what happens in vegas it doesn't stay in vegas darling before you know it it's literally breaking out into souls all over you then i have to get you covered you know what happens in vegas causes issues that pump and we need to discuss that darling um so she starts telling them to get revenge on the men she's like no man would do that if can ever told me he wanted to go to vegas there would be no question i would not let him go to vegas and katie says well yah but you know like the way i'm gonna punish tom is like every time he does something like this he has to add another carrot to the ring he gives me but she made you a ring out of a twisty tie he's literally adding baby carrots to it when you suddenly you're proud woman get out of here we use we like slash their tires burn their houses down take their nuts oh wow lisa don't get mad girls get what is it and faith is like chelly and sea bass no you get cheap darling i want to try the pomegranates what would you like for the menu that thing with the pomegranate butter which sounds delicious and i'd love to try it enough out of you you're not a day you're just a day player enough lala what do you want to eat there's no sea bass for for day players darling you have to either be homeless or crazy okay faith in you're right in the middle so goodbye we've already given you a couch what else do you want faith go home and sit on your couch darling faith you already fed the pinot and watch as i mean how could you even want pomegranate butter at this point to lay in sea bass that's not very politically correct lisa but it is very shut downy darling to lay in the sea bass do it i want dolphin served in a cartonose diet co-containers that hold all the cadence together darling i hear all the dolphins are getting their mouths stuck in them bring the dolphins in we'll make a play out of them darling you can't be serving chelly and sea bass lisa what's wrong with land sea bass oh i learned that on the restaurant oh i got yelled at in the restaurant by customers i used to work at when we would serve that yeah you're not supposed to be it's non non-sustainable i guess i mean i don't know what people get pissed off at i didn't know that there was an issue who are pissed at fish look it up to land sea bass looking up right now i just know from customers who got pissy with me when i was away there and i'd be like oh your child has grown so much great to see you guys let me see how i can make you happy okay we've caught us a bass from a totally different sea enjoy it fucking i don't i feel okay are you googling jalaine sea bass i am i am it says uh well here's something from hoffington post and it says when you're eating chelly and sea bass you're actually eating patagonian toothfish oh the truth is revealed no it's not that no one would yell at me for eating a patagonian something i don't know is it possible it's just it's just like misinformed me how's it very useful me misinformed now we're both googling fucking uh in the middle of our stayable on the second hour of our show jalaine sea bass controversy okay that's what i googled and i'll read it to you just so i'm not called a bad waiter the patagonian toothfish that is also known under the trade name chalaine sea bass is considered as one of the forbidden food that gets a lot of controversy this kind of fish is commonly found in the waters with the depth of 45 meters and 38 50 meters such as pacific indians blah blah blah this kind of fish species can live for something to 50 years and can reach a few meters blah blah blah why is it controversial about oh my god because of the slow growing of chalaine sea bass species it made some of the environmental groups decide to ban it from the restaurants and markets what i'm sorry they create an anti-tooth fish campaign to be removed chalaine sea bass from the menu and to avoid illegal fishing that will cause the downfall of the number of its species this kind of fish became one of the most top favorite foods by many but because of the overfishing serving this kind of food has stopped some questions question what website are you on asia pacific economy economics blog okay i'm on netfish dot us because i like to netfish and chill and this is the official blog of netfish which uh offers education and information on high quality responsibly sourced seafood Thursday june 12 2014 last year a year and a half ago in bull the headline oh sustainable fish channel how chalaine sea bass how chalaine sea bass became sustainable for many years chalaine sea bass was the poster fish for unsustainable and environmentally unsound fishing that has all changed now the fishery is shine as a shiny example of how fishermen fisheries uh i'm sorry fisheries managers and NGOs can work together in april 2013 monorady bay aquariums well there you go darling i haven't updated recommendations we get it we get it i can't talk about this anymore i had to listen to my whole thing i'm gonna read my blog you did and you're totally right i skipped mine and got to the important parts it's all happening we put vanderpump rules on trial and then got them acquitted how do you like that for point counterpoint don't don't don't you don't know much on top that shows you how fast things change in the waiter waiting tables news i haven't waited tables for a few years now glad to know that that controversy is over so glad now we don't have to be scared about lance bass being unsustainable so over in vegas uh the guys have finally arrived at dig this the sandbox place and before they can do anything they have to bring that to pass a breathalyzer to make sure they're not drunk before they operate having machinery so surprisingly they actually all pass and jacks he goes he's like i don't think i've ever passed a breathalyzer i'm like dude that's that's not like a bragging doesn't this need to brag about okay you're 40 yeah you're basically making it like you're 40 okay and you also shouldn't like it shouldn't be also like a standard as if like you have to face a breathalyzer like every few months like that's not good that's not good but that's the way he struggles to hold on to his youth he's like yeah man i'm partying it's so awesome like yeah dewes whatever i don't care oh jacks you're 40 darling it's not cute anymore well either way they passed and then we got to see them playing with machines which was uh exciting for them and then and then we saw tom's butt tomah showering and the next you know we saw jacks but it was just basically turned into like a but montage there's lots of but butts and butts and butts yeah this was very fx in like the late 90s is that when nip tuck came on or the early 2000s or whatever they were like butts never was like oh my god this was on tv and started going crazy about butts on tv and now there's just like a line of butts they're like let's just do a whole segment of the guys butts doing their butts and then let's have another separate segment where all of the guys iron their hair yeah i really enjoyed watching jacks blow-drawing Schwartz's hair it was like watching like two monkeys groom each other picking little pellets out of there for who's the area on uh sheena and tom talk on phone about oh so the girls take Lisa's advice to get even darling they're like let's get iron by having a pajama party like really are you gonna fuck some strippers at this party because i don't think you're even by the way you you forgot to mention the fact that uh over at sir james was all pissy because he didn't get invited to the boys on the boys trip he's like oh i guess i don't get involved because of jacks now all right i say what it is this is like get that come out of your mouth iron is like i have a secret james just put that gum in his mouth darling why are you so sad she's like well my dad died blah blah blah dad dead that story and Lisa goes darling was it sudden like is that worse or better like she's asking like that mat like a degree i ask because i see the same symptoms and hunky if it was sudden i would would have given you the weekend off if you knew it was coming maybe a couple of hours late darling i need to know where we are give me the degrees of dead your father is telling why didn't you tell him darling and Ariana says because i don't want to be that person you know that girl is like oh wow i want to bring up something painful to get my weight and i'm like uh but you did do that were you saying i you did tell him that does anybody else know that there's huge nails sticking out of the door behind Ariana she's behind one of those big metal like decorative doors but there's like spikes coming out of it i was like where did you get that door it's like from mohammed sex dungeon don't lean i guess that's the way to get your employees not to lean if you have light time to lean you have time to clean you won't be able to though because your back will be bloody do not lean at the bar darling no leaning no leaning but her advice is it's okay to feel things darling it's okay it's okay it's like oh it's so hanky let it out and he burps up a fish poor thing Lisa oh Lisa darling it's okay to feel things as long as you're not rosio i do not have time to be cleaning up after the cleaning up after all anyway so so then everyone goes over to shina's uh house uh male and our girls man and um they all gather around because they're gonna show the guys that they can have fun too although i don't know how much fun you can have on a dusty old carpet or surrounded by portraits of shina and shea but katie's like okay we're going to play a sex question game that sounds like great fun the sex question game I love the sex question game how do you call sex you go first you're gonna set the timer we're gonna be here forever did you see the glass of wine shina pour herself yeah that was my next note that she goes when she because when they're like shina what's in my lala okay i'm like all right let's go i might lala so uh she calls up lala while waiting for lala to pick up the phone shina has like a novelty size it's probably not even a wine glass it's actually probably to put a little plant in and she just pours the entire bottle essentially into this thing it's like still got the macrame netting around it shea's like in the corner doing the roger rabbit behind the wall like shave and a haircut she's like i love the least i told them not to go to vay she's like don't take shade to vay you got to take an alcoholic to vaguess get him wasted at the pajama party that's totally fine totally safe from say it's just taking sauce and then they show him taking your shot and they stop the music you watch they take the shot that you know it is i love it vwala lala's like she's like when i come on we're in walking distance and lala's like i don't know i was i'm like am i pajamas i'm about to go to sleep and think about mama as if like lala we're really about to go to sleep she's probably like a cross street with binoculars watching them and then she gets the call and like her phone's like not on vibrate by accident she's like oh shit but uh she's just like that's a pajama party that's a pajama party come we'll talk about how we're supposed to commit to the post office everyone's going to tip p on the drug test and well i mean only she is going to but we're all gonna look at it unfortunate we're gonna take shay's p-test together oh that would be so mean okay shay time for your p-test kind of messa night i thought it was very unfeeling of the guys after ariana has been crying the entire episode about how hard it was to lose her father which is legit by the way like we laugh and stuff but not at that i mean god bless her heart and then the guys go to vegas anyway and they go to a ghost bar that is not cool that bar is called ghost uh but the only ghost there they go so real world vegas trisha where are you it was the ghost of peters hair who would be fucking some girl in the bathroom right now but now it's just like i'm a chipping deals dancer and the lady's like oh yep yeah can't tell most of your thoughts so yeah yeah some funny show that it's a big deal and i don't cheat because i can i was like yeah whatever you're in vegas anyone can get laid in vegas that's the point don't pat yourself on the back too much there buddy um i don't know if you can cheat that much with a christen shall haircut but try your best so um uh then the girls to make the guys jealous the girls are all start making out and the guy is like wow and then uh and the guys get really wasted and they go back to the hotel room and then tom's like wow he just fuck it up and spend like go talk to some girls and they all walk out the door in the episode and she didn't lala really made out they all were really making out oh i thought they were kind of kissing but she didn't even lala were like doing it open mouth making out yeah they were yikes girls i just wrote it really big so i felt like i had to say it yeah no they were really really going at it you know that those guys ended up either getting laid or circle jerking because all they could talk about was their wieners for like an hour and then they were putting their butts on each other i hope so i hope it worked out for them i hope so that was our love lavanta pump rules christmas and guess what i don't know if you saw this commercial but vander pumps rules will be on sunday this we saw that be aware everybody um also there's a real house was the sheshah marathon coming up i think it's tomorrow so it's probably really yeah so everybody catch up and this was so much fun you guys have a mary mary christmas banner love talking to you we're loved talking to you so on christmas eve it's right so it's well no it's even no it's could be the this wednesday right that's yeah but it'll be our christmas eve show it'll be coming out christmas eve and we'll watch star wars ben yes christmas eve show for all you go you mount there i'll be accusing ewoks of being illegal because they're not sustainable but i cannot believe they use them in the smooth air totally justifiable nevermind i'll be quiet now ben do were you dropping change what was that i actually dropped the key i for some reason i have a key just sitting here at my desk and i started like fiddling with it sort of like um what's that movie where they fiddle with little something i don't know like a fiddler and you're like i'm done you know you know i just am like fiddling with it and then i dropped it and made a clatter i'll do it again that was your dropping of the mic you like i'm actually doing an npr show i've got my bowl in my spoon here you're makali telling a story yeah she's like and i'm like and then we're both like and she's like whoa i was trying to recreate it a little ahead with a little clicker so i can click it i was making no noise it's just like click click click click stupid no sound i use things that make no sound effect everybody thank you so much if you're listening to this before christmas merry christ if you're listening to it after it's almost the new year if you're listening to it in 2016 why it's over love you guys love you if you like watch what crappins you can listen ad-free right now by joining wendry plus in the wendry app or on apple podcast prime members can listen ad-free on amazon music before you go tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey at wendry.com/survey i'm lindsay graham host a wendry show american scandal we bring to life some of the biggest controversies in u.s history presidential lies environmental disasters corporate fraud in our latest series entrepreneur lu purlman becomes the mastermind behind two of the biggest pop groups in the world the backstreet boys and in sync he also oversees a sprawling business empire that includes a charter jet company restaurants and real estate but purlman's successful facade crumbles after he sued by the boy bands for siphoning millions from them and soon investigators discover that purlman is keeping his empire afloat through an even more devious scheme follow american scandal on the wonder app 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