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For Hers.com/crapins, Hers weight loss is not available everywhere. Compounded products are not FDA-approved or verified for safety, effectiveness, or quality. Prescription required restrictions apply. [MUSIC] This episode of Watro Crapins is brought to you by our premium, Patreon subscriber, and Christy Darity. Yay. Hey everyone, welcome to Watro Crapins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to watch. I'm Ben Mandelker from bsideblog.com and the banter blender podcast. And joining me as always is the hilarious, the funny, which is the same thing as hilarious, the well-rested Ronnie Karam from Trash Talk TV.com. What's up Ronnie? Hello. Yeah, you're doing good things and then making them bad. She's devaluing me in the intro. That's a lot. I'm deprecating in one sentence. I know. I'm just going to... It's a past aggressive intro. No, it wasn't. deprecating. My value is depreciating. I'm not going to talk today, I'm just going to sit here. You just talk to Kate. Well, that's about to say, you don't have to talk because we have a guest here and we are so, so, so very excited about this. This is none of... It's a bravo star. First of all, this is a full-fledged bravo star. We are a legitimate podcast people. No more Disney Channel here, all right. No more sprout stars, okay? This is... We've gone to graduate to bravo. It is one of our favorite bravo stars. Actually, I'm not just saying that because she's here. It's Kate Chastain from Below Deck. Hey, Kate. Hey, guys. So excited to be here. So excited that you're here, pretend we have a live in studio audience, everyone's clapping. Even in their cars is clapping, I'm sure. Well, it's not safe, yeah, but it's good for us. In a safe way, they are clapping or they will pull over to the side to give you the applause you deserve. They're clapping on the inside. They are, they are. I'm always clapping on the inside and it sounds weird. So first of all, before we get into everything, let's do some social media plugging as usual. So if you come to watchercrapins.com, that has links to everything, Twitter, Instagram, all that stuff. So check that out. Follow us. We're very needy. Second of all, facebook.com/watchercrapins is our Facebook page, which is super highly active. We have like 5,000 people on there and everyone's posting content. It's basically a blog that's on Facebook. It's really fun. If you want to get more out of your bravo or Watcher Crapins experience, definitely go to Watcher Crapins on Facebook. And then lastly, you can support us on Patreon, patreon.com/watchercrapins, where there are different tiers that you can support us at. And depending on what tier you support us at, you can get different perks. You can get access to our weekly bonus episode, which is like a whole other podcast. You can ask questions or ask them a question that we'll read on the air and ringtones and hangouts, all that fun stuff. So that's patreon.com/watchercrapins. And Kate, do you have any social media you want to plug as long as we're plugging things away? Yeah, I usually just use Twitter and it's "Kate_Tustain". Yes, a very funny Twitter account. So wow, we got through that. So let's just get to the good stuff. So Kate, we are so excited. You are here. I think my first pressing question is, you are a for real yachty, correct? You're not just an actress who's signed up for a reality star. Yeah, I don't just play one on TV. I actually was in Yachty for about seven years before I did Below Deck. Wow. And how did you get from being on some anonymous yacht onto the most famous yacht in the world? Oh, well, I actually had helped a author who she wrote a book, "How to Become a Yacht Sturt Essence", the book that I Googled and found after I graduated college and it got me into the industry. So when she heard, seven years later, that Robbo was coming out with this reality show, she realized a lot of people would probably Google how to work on a yacht and her book needed updating. And knowing that I had written for a women's magazine and also been a yachty, she contacted me and asked me to update her book for her. So I was in touch with production and after their first season, they were looking to recast Chief Stu and reached out to me. So what is it like, that is so crazy. So you were literally discovered like an actor. That's how people dream of being discovered, like, I was at home. I was eating my fingernails, which is like, I'm guessing your favorite snack. And I say that with complete admiration. And respect, yeah. High in protein. Totally. Yeah. Yeah. You're just like sitting at home, writing your article, and then you're on a TV show. That's awesome. That doesn't happen for actors anymore. I know I did. That's like the dream. That's why extras are always like, extras are being extra in the background of scenes because they're like hoping they will be discovered. A little did they realize they just have to, you know, edit a resource about being a yachts yachty. Yeah. Exactly. Well, you know, I watched the first season and I was literally working on a boat. I would watch below deck while our guests were upstairs eating dinner. And I just knew when I got the email that it was something I would enjoy and have fun with. What's it like? I don't even remember you not being on this show. Who was the first one that it was that's called? Adrienne. Adrienne. Adrienne. That's the one that never wore makeup and had wet hair in a bun all the time. You actually came back after all, by the way, this is, by the way, this is what I love about Kate because what you said, technically there's nothing wrong with what you just said. You just said something just totally factual. But you know, it's like there is a hidden meaning in it. And I love that, you know, like your hair is wet all the time. It's like you could be British practically. Do you realize this? That's like, and that's a high compliment. It really is. And my sister lives in London. I was just over there last month for a couple of weeks and I just love that city and I really love Carolyn Stanbury. Yes. You know, and the British have really mastered the art of snark. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm like a put down. You don't have to be real. We get so wussy over here about it, everybody's so freaked out. So it's nice to see someone still doing it with pride out there. Well, actually, it's one of the things that annoys me most about Ben, the chef on my show because I was like, excuse me, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, because he's British. Yeah. He gets away with saying the most horrendous things and I was like, oh, it's just because of his accent. That's so British. And I say things that are like that girl is a beat on. Do you think it's also because he's a man too? Yes. Also because he has a penis. Yeah. I had a resectual penis because people say that to you about me. They're like, oh, his accent, that gay accent. I knew he was going to be a bitch. Yeah. They write. It's a gay thing too. Yeah. So is it, what's it like working on a yacht when there are, that's being on like a reality show? Is it, do you have to like, are you able to do the normal things you have to do or do you have to like do reshoots and everything? Like, I don't even understand how it would, you can even fit cameras on there. Oh my gosh. The first time I ever joined the season or the show, I brought a box of chocolates for the real crew and also for production, but I didn't realize there were like 70 people on production side. So clearly I did not bring enough. And that's a really big difference in regular yachting and doing the show. There's just so many extra humans on the boat at all times. There's 70 people on the boat, extra people on the boat? No, they do it in shifts. Oh, okay. They have like a land base and they come in shifts, but that's still a lot of extra people moving around a small space. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Does Amy fall in love like 10 times a day? Oh my gosh, guys, I really love her. And I think she is just so funny this season. She's hilarious and such. She's like a sally field. Yeah. Like me. She is so cute. I just. You guys are hilarious. Oh, starfish. Yeah. It's just funny because she's just sort of cast every, just every way they show her is this sort of sad, lonely, always a bridesmaid, never the bride. Even last night, it was like some big montage before the housewives got on the boat and they cut to her. The music just stops and she's blowing up a balloon alone and she's like, I starfish, we have a party tonight starfish. Okay. I got a balloon. Oh, I popped the balloon. You're the first one on this crazy, you know, a blow job. Oh my God. And I saw that scene. And I was, I thought about you guys. Oh, I died. I laughed out loud. I couldn't believe they did that. The editors are such dicks. And there's also one that it's obsessed with a meal, crotch shots. I think there's been like five of a meal dick shots of him getting out of his, I don't know, what do you call that, the attic? Yeah. Oh, this is crawl space. The editing is so good this year. They have, there's so many good, like subtle nuances. Yeah. There was actually something even funny last night. I wish I'd written it down. And it was like a one second thing. It was like, here's a slice of life. And it just cracked me up. And of course, I don't remember it. So a great story of me. But you know, it's like, I know what you're saying. It's, I think I'm so involved in the season. I think maybe the editing is part of that because I actually feel like I'm part of what's going on on this boat. There's definitely a difference this season in the editing and it's much more fun and like tongue and cheek. And they're really having a good time with it. I think you can tell. Yeah. Well, also you guys as a crew seem, even with, even with some of your duds like Dane and you know, whoever else that, that Don, it was named Don, Dan, whatever, in the beginning, you guys are like generally a pretty functional crew, even, even with Leon there, except for that one episode, you guys were still pretty functional compared to member season one. And it was such a disaster. Every episode, things were going wrong. And Captain Lee was yelling at everyone. And now he's like, chuckling. It's, you guys have come a long way. Yeah, we have taken off my socks and I'm feeling relaxed. I think he has relaxed quite a bit since season one. Well, yeah, he has. He's totally not. He even smiled a little bit last night. It was weird. Yeah. Last night, you smiled a lot, which felt awkward and he smelled, he smiled so much. I was like, what is going on on this boat? Everybody is getting laid on this boat because everybody's so happy. So I had so many questions that I don't even know where to start. I guess we'll just, I mean, should we ask some questions or do you want to like do a regular recap of the show like normal do we'll leave it at. Oh, and then I can like tell you what happened as you recap. Um, yeah, I feel like I still have some general questions I want to ask before we jump into the recap. Okay. My first question that every single human that sees me in public asks is, is Rocky really that crazy? Okay. Sure. Is she really that crazy? She's actually more crazy than that. Is that actually her song through the wall right now? Trying to get into the podcast? Do you hear that noise? Oh, I'm sorry. Am I, are you getting background noise? Oh, I, I thought it was for me because I've got a drill going outside mind. Listen, don't worry about background noise. This podcast. This is okay. This is not serial. Okay. If this is serial with a C. Okay. It's spoke with Kate on the telephone. We asked her questions questions. She had to look deeply to answer this is not inside the reality actor studio. I actually, I actually like it. It's very NPR to have the sound effects, um, the way you held that manager's meeting. Some people would describe it as life changing, Miss Jastain. How would you describe it? If you can find words to describe your soul. So, yeah, so Rocky is crazier than what we see. So is she even a yachty? Is she, was she just cast as like a reality star? I think that she lied on her resume. I think she may have like worked on a yacht once. Or she like, she like went to a pool one time with the parents. It was a floating swan in her parents' pool in the backyard and she's like, I have sea time. Yeah. She just puts on a sailor hat and sings anything goes and thinks she's been on a yacht. As long as someone inflates me, I'll do whatever you ask. Yeah. You can't play it in every day. She, um, I mean, what was it like to work with Rocky? She is, I mean, it's not for the fact that she's crazy. I mean, I don't understand how you can be productive at a workplace with someone like that. I mean, I don't want to throw too much shade. But she's, I felt like a hostage, quite frankly, because, okay, don't throw too much shade. But yeah, but I, it was a hostage situation and she was my captor because like, she wouldn't do her job. So I mean, I had to do it for her and anytime I tried to ask her to do her job, it, it turned into like a meltdown. So we just kind of had to like handle her with kid gloves while splitting money with her evenly. It was just adding insult to injury, quite frankly. And where did she go? That's the, that's the, you really know she sucks in that regard when everybody turned on her because I feel like everybody's so polite that even when there's a jerk, they're like, Oh, you know, even Dane, it's like, Oh, what a dick, get him off the boat. But he's got some issues. I hope he's okay. You know, everybody ends, but she's just like being stuck on a plane with the child that won't stop screaming. Yeah. And you're trying to like explain to them that they shouldn't be screaming and shitting all over the plane, but they just can't like it's in their nature, you know, you have to walk, you have to walk rocky up and down the boat to get out of your hands. Like bouncing her and birthing her and telling her what a good little baby she is. My parents sent me on a job that was always rocking and I'm still, I just can't stop crying. Maybe that's why she's always the giant cradle honey. Maybe that's why she's always staring at the ceiling in her interviews. Someone's like dangling a little toy above her to keep her calm. It's like, Oh my gosh, that's like the number one comment on social media, Twitter, Facebook, why she always looking at the ceiling. And I mean, I just think it's because she's just so not genuine that she like is coming up with these fictional stories in her head and she's creating them while she's saying them. Well, you're definitely a girl who's watched all of Law and Order. And I respect that. Yes. Thank you. Do we know where she went? Do we know where she went to culinary school, by the way? Oh, listen. She's her. She was telling us that she did all these life things like an a pack of farmer, a ski instructor, da da da da. An astronaut. And I'm just like, I just don't think that you did any of this more than four days. Like, I think you show up. You're like, Oh, this is hard. This is like work. I'm going to go home now. Yeah. Well, you know, when it like someone who's in their young young 20s, you like my English, I was an English teacher as well besides a broadcaster, but people in their early 20s, when they've had 300 jobs on their resume, it's like, well, I know that you think this fills a page, but this doesn't make you look good. Yeah. You might want to pick two. Yeah. Exactly. Just, just because you were a temp one day at like the court on blues front desk reception area does not mean you actually went to court, you know, culinary school. Yeah, I did that. I made up a fake resume to get jobs waiting tables in New York when I was 18 because who the hell's going to hire some kid, you know, right? So I looked up in the good old phone book back then. They were still hanging off phones that were outside. You could put a quarter into you. No, I guess was a nickel. What, that's 25% of my phone bill. And yeah, I just made up a huge resume. I typed it up and I went around and I was like, ah, here are the 25 dining restaurants I've worked at. And they're like, uh, why did they all fire you? You were, you were, you're basically like the working girl of, of watering, Melanie. Yeah. The boss who breaks her leg. Like, who's like hobbling down the hallway trying to face my people. Sigourney Weaver, who's irreplaceable. Uh oh. Is that, is that Bueller? Bueller gets excited with the mention of Sigourney Weaver, so I know I once was on a plane with her. I have a lot of stories where I tell people that I was on a plane with someone, but it's true. I was on a plane with Sigourney Weaver and I felt so glamorous. I felt that's a, that's Ben's book, okay. Her hair cut once, her Sigourney Weaver haircut. Uh, which one was it because she has so many personalities in all of her hairstyles? It was, um, when Yolanda from Beverly Hills got her hair cut recently and you said it looked like a Sigourney Weaver haircut. Oh, wasn't it to me more mom haircut? Yeah. Oh, maybe that's home. Yeah. I can't remember past a week. I know. Neither can I. The Ambien. So, so when, um, so should we ask, okay, before we get into the episode, we have to ask our Leon questions, right? We have to talk about Leon. Uh, yeah. So we also have to talk about nonboat things, or non show things because I want to ask, um, like your celebrity stories. Yeah. Oh, Leon first. Leon, so you, you hated him right away, right? That's what I was going to show. Well, I was going to give him the, like a fair chance, especially because I know that people know that chef Ben and I had hooked up or more friends. I was like, already knew that people were like, Kate doesn't like him because she likes Ben better. So I was really trying extra hard to find some kind of palatable redeeming quality in whatever chef and Leon made it impossible. Like the first moment I met him, I was like, so we're going to be best friends, roommates. And he's like, do you keep a clean bathroom, which is just like awkward because obviously no, I don't. Right. Because you were saying you don't, you don't like to clean up, like you spent all this time cleaning other people that when it comes to your stuff, you're like, not, you don't do that that much. Right. Didn't you say that on one episode? Yeah, certainly. But also like when I'm working on it as a chief stew, I don't have time. I don't sleep. Like I'm, if I'm in my room, I'm changing or that's it. Right. I'm not going to like wipe down the counter. So my chef roommate has a better day. Well, also to be told that right when you move in, it's kind of like, you're very clean, right? Hey, how about you worry about how clean you are? Yeah. It's dirty. Tell me later. But like, don't meet me like that. I browse like that. Or how about the only to look at you with shining like eyebrows that they actually like trim down. That's very rare to see. He does have good eyebrows and I don't like the guy at all. And for me to say that, I mean, they are like, but they're too good. You can't trust them. They don't trust you. Your eyebrows. I don't know. And guys should not trim. You know not to trust him too. Perfect. I like psycho killer eyebrows, whatever. He does have psycho killer everything. Whenever I think of Leon, I have a very strange association, which is that I felt like five or six times during the season, whenever there was like those like montage screens that look like 24 where there's like six panels on the screen, Leon would either be like either eating over a bowl or they'd cut to him in his bed with his arm over his head and you just see his big old armpit, his big hairy armpit over and over and over again. So every time I think of Leon, I just think of that nasty armpit and disgusting. That's pretty accurate. Like that's all he was doing. Like, and him always having his armpit out is a gross feeling. And that's kind of him encapsulated in an aura. Yeah. It is. You know, now that we're talking about those 24 montages, you're never seen in those. Now that I think about it, because usually it's like bloop bloop bloop bloop bloop, whatever. And the beep is going and they're like the what's it called the row anchor. The anchor is going down or whatever. They're not talking. It's like the anchor is going down. When sweeping something, someone's cleaning the window, someone's getting out of bed. It's like all very dramatic, you know, but you never see what you're doing. Unless you're like folding something, you just not let people around your area. No, I'm just always working like this. I did the season two, they had to tell me like, Kate, when the camera's on you, can you like stop working for a second because we're trying to make a show? That's true. You only really stop when you're asking for an order in the kitchen or talking to a guest, I guess. That's the time you're really standing still. Yeah. Yeah. Or in the confessionals, obviously. That would be amazing. What do you guys call those? The confessionals or the diary rooms or what? I still don't know what to call them. Yeah. They call them interviews when we do them. But I've seen some bloggers call them talking heads and I really like that. Yeah. Yeah, that's that that pretty much sums it up. I think. Where do you guys record those? And when do you record them? Do you record them during shooting? Like, do you record them once every few days? Right. So actually, that's a great question. And it's one of the reasons that making a reality show while yachting is extra difficult because even if the charter guests leave, you would think we still have to turn around the boat and maybe have some downtime. But on that one day, we're also shooting those. Yeah. And that's probably a few hours per person, right? Oh, for sure. Oh. And you have to be changing out of one outfit and into another. Emil has to take off one shirt he wears every day to put on the other shirt he wears every day. Oh, Emil. Yeah. Oh, but I didn't want to say y'all are so spot on. This is how I knew I loved you guys. I heard you guys talking about the boat's interior. Mm hmm. Yes. Oh, my. So 90s. 80s. That's exactly what I said. I didn't know if it was 80s nice. It was like country wood color. Yeah. And every every table sort of looks round on the side like the edges are round. It's like a country wood color, but then they try to make it zen. But the zen doesn't max match the 80s wood color. It's just weird. And the font, the font of Eros is like, it's like a Greek, I know it's called Eros, so it should be Greek. But it looks like a place where you get like a, like a, like a euro, yeah, a euro. It's like, yeah, it's like here kind of get my spanico, but please it's, it does look like that. There should be little like blue menu font. Yeah, there should be blue placemats, paper placemats everywhere with mazes on them and like history of the gods. Uh huh. Exactly. The Euro font. You know, like the standard, the Euro restaurant font. But also like, I had to say, I, I really, I hate, I hated the master suite and on the boat because to me, it seemed like such a waste of space have those staircases there. I personally, if I were on that, if I were, if I had that master suite, I want that extra space just to have space, like what does it, where is the benefit of having like a little staircase that goes up, you know, there's like a little bit of a couch and I guess you would call it like a little sitting room. But if you're in your master, you want to be like sleeping or doing something fun. You're going to be sitting on this lame couch when there's decks and decks and main salons and skylonges. It is a waste a little bit. But you know, when I was giving a tour, I'm not going to say that to the guests. I'm like, Oh, this is really, this is really unique. This is always this master bedroom. Yeah. And this is the frosted glass. Yes. And I say it all the time. But every time you walk through that saying that, I just want you to say things like Robert Cooley farted in here, like just really weird 70s, 60s and 70s references of like ghosts coming back and still partying in there. Because that's what it looks like to me. When all the walls are shellacked, you know, it's like kind of rich, but still really ugly. It's like, how much were they spilling back then when that design came up? You know, that like was like, select back in the day, you know, that like the two blonde ladies from Perfect Rangers used to take this yacht out. They're like, Oh, it's so glamorous, you know, but I have a question. Why did you make the Real Housewives last night take up all their shoes when they got in? Is that like a thing you do on the yachts? Oh, absolutely. And there's generally no shoes allowed on the boat at all because the teak would outside is really sensitive and the all the finish and burnishings are also quite expensive and hard to replace if damaged. So there's no boats on shoes. Wow. What's that? I mean, those shoes on boats, sorry. Yeah. So you, are you guys barefoot or you guys like in the little sneakers or like more barefoot usually, but I think that's kind of gross when you're serving food. So if we do wear shoes, there'll be shoes that we only wear on the boat. Wow. That's interesting. See, I had a little stuff like that. That's what I like about the show. And that's why if I may digress for one moment, like a praise ski, which is like, you know, below deck on, on the mountains, I don't feel like I'm going to learn anything interesting like that, you know, whereas it's like it's sort of like a cool little tidbit about yachts. I feel like I think that's why it's popular because it is like a glimpse into the lifestyles of the rich and famous. And there's like a technical aspect to below deck, but I think opera ski coming out, it's a great compliment to our show, but I haven't had a chance to see it yet. Yeah. I mean, it's fine show has a lot of potential, but I just feel like it's like below deck is more of an authentic world for a show, you know, it's like these are, you know, people have to be together, you know, working on this boat because you're on a boat. Right. And you actually have to work. Yeah. Totally different. I feel like maybe I press gay is more like pump rules. Yeah. They're going. It's like somewhere between pump rules and below deck, which by the way, I'm down for that hybrid. I'm totally down. Don't get me wrong. Yeah. There's gonna be like a bowling alley when like everybody who works at the bowling alley. How much? How, how much? I just like that they're finally your guys are the only show where people actually do something. Yeah. I like that. Yeah. First I was like, why am I going to watch maids on a boat? This show looks stupid. I didn't want to watch it at all when it first. That's how I didn't remember the first, the first chick. What was her name? Adrian. Adrian. God. What hair? So that's why I didn't remember her. And then when I actually started watching it, I really liked it because when you do that kind of a job, there is so much frustration, but you also have to learn how to deal with people in such a different way. It's not like on pump rules where you could just be like, you can't just like blow them and then pretend you didn't the next day. You know, like there's different way you have to learn to actually talk to people. Yeah. Absolutely. I think the best thing I learned from yachting and not being sarcastic at all is social awareness. Like you have to kind of learn how to be polite in what you don't want to be because there's no escape. So now with Leon going back to Leon, obviously things bubbled over and things got crazy. So like how much of like at first when when you were like saying what you just just told us how you tried to be friendly to him and then he was like, I hope the bathroom is clean. And you know, you said that on the show like, great, like that's what what a way to meet. I remember when I watched, I was like, well, okay, I mean, like, you know, like, give it a moment. You know, it's probably someone new and Kate doesn't want to like someone new. But like at what point then became obvious, I know he really is a dick like how quickly did his ass wholeness really did it take for his ass wholeness to really, really come out. I knew it as soon as I met him because I could tell he was lying. He hasn't worked on yachts as much as he says he has. And I have nothing against cruise ships. It's not that I have something against somebody who's lying about their experience because then I can't give them any advice on how to work on a yacht because they're going to get defensive because they're lying. Right. And as soon as we went down to our bedroom and unpacking, he got even more offer, which they didn't show. He was like starting a lecture me on my personal investments. And I'm like, whoa, I met you an hour ago and you're asking me if I've saved my yachting money, like too fast buddy. Yeah. Maybe you're putting all that cash cake, you got a plan. Listen here. Right. Pretty much. That's literally how. And I was like, any real yachting knows you like kind of try to avoid like unnecessary awkward conversations. You don't like dive right in and bring them up. Right. Because you could be sleeping next to each other for a long time. Why don't we worry about my Wells Fargo account later? Yeah. Yeah. He comes off as like a really controlling guy right from the start. I did not see that he was lazy because that is one way his eyebrows did not properly communicate because normally people with eyebrows like that work very hard. So I was surprised. You know how everyone has their default setting like Ben was talking about him with his like armpit hanging out in bed like half asleep or whatever like he always was on the show. And Eddie does that one where he's on the phone with his girlfriend and he's like leaning back in bed and his like double he's like resting on the, you know, the part, the double chin part of your. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like their default state. And when that was his, I was like, how can a person with eyebrows like that have a default state like that? Because he's also equally lazy and selfish and that's only hair on his topic from his shoulders up. So like he has to really, you know, make the most of it. So really? So does he wax? I don't know. But I'm pretty sure that's why he was so concerned with my bathroom time in the first place because I want to make sure he had enough space to make those eyebrows perfect. Or enough time to masturbate with that he's watching with the meal. And like even the beef cheeks, I never even tried them. I don't even care. But he would put them in a sous vide, which is like a crock pot of water. He would put them in the morning, the guests arrived and 36 hours on the second night served them. And so much like he didn't even have to touch them. He would just pull them out and any protein, if you put it under heat for 36 hours is eventually going to surrender and become tender. It's not like a skill. That's what I say about myself. Well, you know, the thing is that in the beginning of the season, his dishes when they came out looked really good and the guests were loving them and I was like, well, he's a dick, but he's really good at his job and all that. And then you were saying this stuff about he's not even a real yachty. And I remember kind of like that was the thing that we were laughing about. He's not even a real yachty. Oh my God. But then of course the season, we actually saw what you were talking about. And that was kind of amazing. I was like, Oh, I see what she means about the flexibility and yada, yada, yada. And he was just cooking the same thing over and over again. And then now that Ben is on back on the boat, you can actually see a huge difference in like the style of who he makes in the variety and and his ability to improvise fresh vegetables. My God. Yeah. Like the I said, comparison that Leon is more like a mini van, Ben is more like a Porsche, like, yeah, Ben is good at doing really sophisticated high design meals and Leon's built for masses. Yeah. Yeah. And that's, I thought it was pretty clear that that's what you were saying. You know, everybody gets so like defensive all the time about everything, but you're just saying the guys putting out the same product every day, like a, you know, like a line. Right. And that's totally true. And I mean, there's something to be said. I mean, it's not the same guests over and over again. So I mean, each guest does not know that this is the same dish that's been served. Yeah, I get that. That's fine. But it was more, that's more of a symptom and it just showed us that's what it was. Yeah. And it's interesting just watching last night when, when first of all, the real housewives came on and they were, they had a few requests. They asked for dinner early or whatever. And it was kind of like no big deal, you know, they asked for, they asked for a barbecue. And I was just imagining if Leon had to cook barbecue, he'd be like, Oh, well, all right, I guess I serve some beef cheeks with some A1, I guess, you know, it's like, like Ben actually just, like, you know, he, he figured out the cuisine and he made it work. And I don't think Leon would have done that. Yeah. No, we would have been serving beef cheeks with barbecue sauce from a bottle. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. He's doing like dinner theater, you know, it's the same thing every night. And then you've got Rocky running around, like literally doing dinner theater, shaving the tops off of muffins. I could not believe that, like, how do you not realize when he says wipe off, like spill over. Yeah. It's like the stuff on the pan there. Oh, God. I got. So tell us about, so tell us some good boat stories. Do you know a lot of celebrities and stuff now? Just from doing the show, I would imagine, do you guys go to all the Bravo parties and stuff like that? Like the Christmas party? No, actually, I might, my invite must have gotten lost in the mail or maybe I was out at sea, which is awkward, but, um, I don't even know if there was one, by the way, I'm just assuming. Um, no, I mean, below Jack is a fairly new show. So we haven't spent too much time doing PR or anything with Bravo, but I did have a lot of celebrities on boats in my career, like, um, let's see, Leonardo Caprio, yes, I did have him on board in St. Bart's. He's like the most handsome person ever when you see him, uh, I had, I worked for one woman who had like the best party in Cannes every year and she has an angel ball in New York City and she's like, we had Star Jones and she was really cool. Come in. Can you just wait? Hold on a second. Did you just go from Leonardo Caprio to Star Jones, because I'm going back in my, yeah. And then there's a card and then there's a card and then it was coming Kanye, but when they first started dating, um, let's see, we had actually, I was on Bravo, yeah. And then we had the, uh, McBurgler or whatever his name is, big bird, Elmo. It was great. But then also I was on Bravo before I even was on the show and I forgot about this because they were filming the real housewives of New York and I was on a yacht in the Hamptons and Bethany had dated my yacht owner and we were all out and they were filming and they, the housewives tried to come on our boat, but, uh, my boss at the time was not really into it. But then later Ramona walked up the dock and came on board and invited herself and she was just as she is on TV. Yeah. Hi. Do you have any wine? Is there any wine here? Because I left mine in the hotel room. Who doesn't have wine? Do you have everything? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. That's a classic. If you don't have a Vermona wine on your yacht, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Hi, Star Jones. Yeah. Oh, well, you're lucky that boats don't remind her of her father. She would have had a nervous breakdown right there and then helicopter would have come to pick her up. She would have had to jump off like Rocky. Yeah. That's cheap. A lot of yachts. They're owned by like billionaires that you would never even know like Russian oligarchs. It's like not that exciting. The celebrities are always just guests. Right. Friends and friends. Yeah. Um, what's the biggest yacht? That's the biggest yacht. Owned by private billionaires and stuff. Yeah. So they just, that's just like their little business. They have a couple boats. Oh, it's not even a business. It's just like another vacation home that they come and hang out on. Oh, I see. Yeah. What's the biggest yacht you've worked on? About 200 feet. Anything larger than that, it's just your crew gets like 20 people and it's not as fun. So around 180, 200 feet, you've got to crew about 15, 17 and it's young, attractive people from around the world and that's amazing. How big is the one on the season? This season was 160 and that's pretty perfect size. Wow. And that's pretty cool that you don't see much of the, um, like the bravo end of it because it must feel crazy just going to work like normal for a few months and then having all of that on TV because you're not planning it. Like you're not, I guess you're not getting all of the bullshit in your head around you, you know, I thought it was. Yeah. Sorry. It's super interesting. When I first went on for my first season, I was like, I got extra lip gloss and makeup. And I was like, I'm going to keep one on every level. Some noise camera ready, you know, being vain. My day two, I was like, get out of my way, like forgot they were there by like week two. I was actually jealous that the cameras weren't on me. No, um, I thought it was funny last night that when you guys were having your meeting and you saw that it was, it was going to be the real housewives of Atlanta that Eddie was like, Hey, they're on TV. I'm like, you realize you're actually on TV on the same network that you're actually promoting their show actively. Yeah. Yeah. That was a hilarious moment. I didn't even know what to say. What I can say. Like, do we say it? Do we break down that fourth ball like, Oh, and we're on TV too. No, we're not. Oh. I know. I thought that was a very bizarre moment. Yeah. Yeah. Cause you can't say things like, Hi, nice to meet you, lady that Andy doesn't have a doll of behind his head. Oh my God. Hi, not me. Me. Or whatever. I also like to. I'm sorry. I'm just going to say I liked how, uh, you know, you see Cynthia, um, why am I blanking on Cynthia's last name, uh, Cynthia Bailey Bailey. She's walking down and everyone's like, Oh, it's diva time. So it's going to be diva time. And then the end they're like, wow, these guys were, you know, these were like really nice, really nice guests. It's pretty easy. I'm like, yeah, have you ever seen the show? She's the most boring housewife there is. Of course. There's no problems. When she kept saying, um, Oh yeah, I'm such a diva, I'm very hard to please and stuff like that. I was like, you are not. You're like the easiest. I'm surprised she wasn't back. They're cleaning counters and shit. Yeah. Like, I'm on counter duty tonight. Fritos, their food list was like, Fritos pizza, uh, something cooked chips fruit loops. Yeah. Yeah. Fruit loops. Uh, so have you ever had anything on a boat that's made it what's your most intense relationship on a boat and not necessarily sexual, obviously, but where you've just been stuck with somebody and you can't get away from them. I mean, I'm not going to lie. The season was probably one of my most difficult seasons on or off camera between Rocky and Leon. It was really, really difficult because generally those people get fired much sooner. Mm hmm. Yeah. They can't just fire them as easily here. Although you wouldn't know it because you guys have been through a few people now. Well, that was like the season. It's like, Hey, you're the hot guy again. Yeah. Yeah. That was the problem because we went through dawn and then Dane. We really weren't in a position to be losing cast members left and right anymore. So we were kind of stuck with, uh, yeah. Was there, is there a lot of, um, I don't want to, and I don't want to put you in a position here, but in terms of like things that are scripted versus things that are really happening or, or proves your intervention, like, um, I remember when this show first began, I was like, I'm not going to watch it. It's just going to be all totally scripted. But you know, when I watch it, it feels actually like it's not as scripted as you think. How much of it would you say is, is there intervention? Are you allowed to say zero that is scripted? I mean, it all is really happening now because it's so expensive to charter about, um, we only have six weeks to make this whole show. So there are story people that will come and like speed things along and suggest, Hey, maybe have this conversation with that person, but they don't tell you what to say. And if you don't feel comfortable saying it, you just say, no, I can imagine doing that too. No, like, look, you need to have this conversation anyway. Why don't you just do it right now in the kitchen? Did they tell you, did they tell you to have conversations with Leon? Um, say this, like, like, would they say, Hey, what, you seem frustrated with Leon. You should maybe talk to him about it, but they say things like that. Yeah. Um, yeah. Because what I was avoiding speaking to him, because I really got such a dark vibe from him. I thought if I told him what I really thought, you know, he's got sharp knives around him, and I just didn't trust that he wouldn't black out and do something scary. So I was kind of, yeah, they wished that I had spoken my mind a bit more with him, but I didn't. Did you, he does, he does have that meanness when he gets mad. And that's a difference because Ben does get, you know, crazy back there or whatever. It's not like he's not a diva, but he doesn't have the mean edge, you know. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, you can tell the difference between someone who is stressed out and is like losing their mind at the moment versus someone who is just nasty. Yeah. He had very dark energy and it was like, I do not want to unleash that. So once he was family, it's enjoyable. He's like, you're an idiot. This is stupid. Everything's dumb. You ruined everything. Okay. Still working on him, he's new for me, but did you ever get. So once Leon was fired, did you like, did you do something with that dehydrator box? See, that was, that was the last straw for me because it was like he literally only wanted the box because I wanted the box and it was so frustrating because there is a rule. There's another yodding tidbit on most yachts cardboard is not even allowed on the boat. Like if you get a delivery and a cardboard, you take the cardboard off the boat because there could be bugs. And if you get bugs on the inside of the boat, it's like a thousands of dollars to redo the boat or bomb the boat. So Leon telling me to save the cardboard was like him just showing his inexperience. Yeah. He's fighting to look like an idiot. Yeah. Is that what you're pointing out? There was mold in the bottom. But I mean, that didn't help either, it's like, it's hard for it shouldn't be here. It definitely shouldn't be here because it's moldy. So thanks for that, Leon. Get your moldy car. And didn't he, didn't he pour honey in your bed when he left? We didn't even ask you about that. Yes, he did. And so Connie and I had like been doing pranks on each other all season. Like one day I had these leggings I'd wear and she sewed one of the legs shot, which was hilarious. Um, so when I got to my bed after that charter, it was in such a long day and I go to bed and there's honey. I was like, Connie, she's like, I didn't do that. And um, a meal was in a crew mess laughing and he was like, Leon did it. He said he'd get the last laugh and I was like, well, I think it's hilarious. And I just went, stayed in a guest room and Eddie and Connie had cleaned my sheets for me. Wow. Nice. Meals, I probably like making far noises with his armpit. That's 22. Yeah. I'm a comedian. I share share that woman. Yeah. You want to go? You want to go Kate? You want to go right now Kate? You want to say something? You want to say something right now Kate? Go on then. I'm like, whoa, whoa, back down there, browse. Yeah. Yeah. He was objectively terrible that Leon. So after all of this is over, do you know who do you talk to in real life? Is your life like an actor where you're just always gone and it's hard to have relationships? Like what's your real life like? Um, actually, I just started working for a private jet company, which I'm super excited about because it's like twice the money, half the work, like you travel. It's amazing. Um, I still keep in contact with Ben, Amy, Connie, Kat from the last season, Captain Lee and I talk all the time. I'm at Eddie. I talked to everyone, even Rocky and Emile have messaged me since the show. Wow. Well, could you tell that Emile didn't like you as hard as he doesn't on the show because he seems to be really nice to you on the show? Were you surprised when you heard him talking trash? No, because I caught him a few times and I even tried to like help him. I was like, listen, Emile, it's not a good look for you. Like I'm the chief stew and I thought you were real yachty and you're kind of like aligning yourself with two people that are not likable. So if I were you, I'd maybe reconsider. And since then he has been like, I'm so sorry, but it's kind of like, well, I told you and now it's like, Oh, thanks. Now it's on television. Yeah. But you'll send me a text now, thanks. It's amazing how his like hotness has has diminished. I mean, he's still hot, but like when in the beginning of the season, it's like, Oh, look at this hot guy and he just seems so confident and dreamy. And then over the course of the season, you just realize he's got no game and he's kind of got to stick up his ass a little bit. And he's sort of just sort of like a sweet loser, you know, it was sort of weird to see that transformation. Yeah, I mean, I don't think he's attractive at all, but that's because I know him, but I can see why his features when you first meet him, they're very nice. Yeah. Well, it's like when you. You're so funny. You called it when you called it with the Ryan notling when you said that guy was hot at first. And then, I don't know, like snake loafers or whatever, you're like, and then he opened his mouth or something. And that's so true. Like you always like them the first day because they're hot. And then, Oh no, they also talk, no, who are your, who are your least favorite guests? Oh, all of our guests this season were really, really great. My least favorite guests from, from last season, we had this one lady who had a dog that was like her best friend. She like talked to it. Yeah. She would. And she was just insane. And she come on twice. Yeah, she loves it. But the dog was like one of those homeschooled kids where you're like, I can tell it's smart and like super loved, but it's also like socially awkward and just wants to like get break free. Yeah. Yeah. It needs, it needs socialization. Yeah. Yeah. I was a little sad that there was no inflatable slide drama this year. That was one of my favorite parts. I was like, Oh, God, I got up the slide and everyone complained and there's 30 seconds you'd watch it. Yeah. It was sent a deck room until like a meltdown, but I think that slide got enough air time last season. It was practically like the 10th cast member. No, it actually was interviewed on Watch What Happens. Yeah. And he's like, No, what's it feel like to be inflated? So slide. Are those real? I like them. What was the last time you got blown? Get it? Oh my God. That's hilarious. I actually would have liked to have seen it this year because it would have been really funny to have seen Don on one of his like power trips dealing with that slide. That was like, I was looking forward to that so much in the beginning of the season and then it never happened. Oh, because you know, he'd be like, listen guys, I know that we should use an inflator, but here's what I think. I've got a new idea. We should maybe just like, I'll get over here and I'll flex my muscles and it'll be attached to a rope. And then the slide will go up. It's easy. Yeah. I'm a slide engineer. I need the stuff for living here. I have questions about last night's show. Yeah. So with these real houses, how perfect is that that you're coming on on the Real House wise week? Of course it was Cynthia. So it's like, did she talk about loaning money to her husband and never getting paid back? No, but I know there wasn't a lot of drama on it, but Claudia looked, there was something up with Claudia. Like she was looking at people really hard. What was it? What was the film? By the way. Like April? No, this was in late February and it was freezing cold. It was like less than 40 degrees. It's like 38 degrees. Wow. EXSO was like 730 PM and it was dark out. So it's like, okay, this was not filmed at a nice time. Oh, look at you. Yeah. I was on order. Wow. Yeah. I'm very detail oriented sometimes. So what my role in the observation was Claudia was giving everybody crazy look. Like you know how everybody was looking a meal up and down. She was giving this like weird cat eye crazy look and then later when they were all laying around on the couch, she was giving a crazy look. My question is, was she crazy because she seemed so normal on the show. But then on this show, she seemed nuts. So tell me behind the scenes. What is she doing? No, she was super sweet with her words, but she definitely is a little intimidating. Yeah. Like she was the head guest. She had the master suite and I think it was her birthday week and oh no, that's Cynthia. So Claudia is very cool. I think that's just, you know, I have a bitchy resting face. I think Claudia just has a bitchy resting face because she was super sweet. I love Claudia. She's thinking very hard about what everybody was saying. So someone would be talking and she'd kind of have that half squint and just be nodding like she was listening really hard and I'm like, why is she looking at everyone so hard? I guess that's just me who noticed it. So let's just let it go and pretend this didn't happen. But I was like, why isn't she like this on the show? Oh, you can see like the wheels turning like she was coming up with things to do. Yeah. Yeah. Well, last she was on a boat with Cynthia, they were like, okay, let's look at our phones. It's like, you guys, what are you going to fight with your Facebook? You better do something. Well, it's like those guys last last season who were like on their computers the entire time doing like day trading or whatever it was, that ridiculous episode. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was really sad for them. If they could have just text me during like direct message on Facebook or something, like we want opinion collater, that would have been easier for everyone because they were on their computers the whole time. Yeah. They, that guy came on the recap site and was going off on the commenters because everybody was making fun of him. He's crazy. He was like an asshole right off. He was having comment wars on the side. It was so, so, so good and he's like, well, you try being a billionaire when you are five or whatever. He's like, I do everything on my own. They're like, not all of those kids are slaves for you on that boat. He's like, I have labor like he posted on Instagram like three days ago, it's like, dude, let it go. He did. He's like, well, I didn't get my water on time when I was on that boat. Like, what is he still talking about? No, he like hashtags below deck because he's trying, he's got like some kind of pyramid scheme kind of deal. Yeah. He's very well of Wall Street. I remember that. Yeah. So he's like trying to get followers. And he's still, even though he like slammed us and said it was like awful experience because he was portrayed poorly, he still doesn't mind using it. Yeah. And it's also like, oh, just like relax, you're on a yacht. Okay. You're on a yacht. Who cares? Yeah. If you're a billionaire, it doesn't matter. You have all the money that you need. So no one's going to, you know, like, you just get over yourself. I have a question because we should start to get into the episode, but really quickly with the fire, I want to know about the day with the fire and then the day afterwards. So was the, was, was the kitchen as dirty as they're saying? Like it was really, really because of the, because there was shit in the oven. That's really what it was. Yeah, it really was. It wasn't your poor pizza skills. No. And I admit it. Yeah. I love some pans in there, but I assume they would be clean. I mean, I've left pans in there when I cooked at home because I'm not in yachty mode when I'm at home, but also like, I was down there and Rocky wanted me to do the DVD player and I literally said, and I wish they'd show this, I was like, okay, I'll go upstairs where I'm comfortable and you stay down here in the galley where you're comfortable and just watch the pizza and the popcorn. I come down. Everything's on fire. And you guys, this is funny. So you guys, I've listened and you're like, Oh, in case running around waving her arms really slowly. Let me, let me just tell you, I had a rag in my hand and what I was doing was beating the smoke away from the fire detectors because I didn't want the fire alarms going off dousing the boat and waking up the gas. I'm telling you, anytime something happens on the boat with the music, even if it's just the anchor outside, it's like, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, and then it shows you not running, but like moving more quickly than usual with your arms moving slowly. I don't know what it is. Maybe that's your default state. I think, yeah, it is. Slailing. Resolve 99% of my life problems. Yeah, my favorite is the kitchen entrance. The kitchen entrance and exit is my favorite because that's like your sitcom space. It's like an 80s sitcom where something's going on in the kitchen. And then you just walk right in that swinging door. Well, it's not a swinging door, but I'm talking like cheers, but you walk right in the swinging door, make one smart ass line, and then you're out the other door. That's my little sound stage exit stage, right? You're like a, you're like a pretty Carla from Cheers, or you can snipe. Yeah. Like this is my first spot. Like I can go snap and run. Yeah. Drive by insult. Just walk by, don't, don't slow down, just drop it and go. I love it. Okay. So let's get into the good old episode. All right. Let's do it. You're only one or do you have more? No, I just wanted to know about it. So it was, so it was just a, it, the kitchen was really just so dirty that I caught on fire. That's bad. Ben validated that one right when he came in. He's like, this place is disgusting. Yeah. These vegetables are two weeks old. That's bad to not even have a vegetable that's fresh. Come on. Yeah. And quite frankly, there have been times where the chef has gone to bed on other chariots, but they leave something prepared for the stewardesses to make like with a no, like 350 degrees. Interesting. He couldn't even clean his own oven out, let alone or cook a conch or cook a conch. And by the way, and I mentioned this on the podcast, I know I keep on delaying us. It's a very important point to me, which is that when the conch episode happened and it was like, oh, we're going to get conchs and cook it, I paused the show because I was curious, because I'm a curious gentleman. And I went on to YouTube and I was like, how do you open up conch? And I sat there and watched it for five minutes. And I was like, oh, so that's how you do it. And then I looked at like some tutorials, I don't know, I don't know why I was going down this path, but I did. And then I started up the show again and Leon was like, I don't know what to do. He was like throwing it against the deck, like a caveman and hammering it. I'm like, dude, you have the internet, just look online for five minutes. They're out fishing. You stupid idiot. Yeah. He didn't even know how to Google, like, I would ask him to make flan for the Mexican party. He's like, yeah, can you Google that out and print it out for me? I'm like, no. You have my phone, Joe Biden, he's like Siri, listen here woman, you're going to find out how to make flan and you're going to do it fast. Yeah. Leon can't even communicate with Siri. That's how much he hates. Yeah. Stupid bitch. There's a woman on my phone. I want to Verizon. Yeah. And I'm probably too dirty. I'm never the first one to be calling someone a sexist or getting all, you know, labily with that stuff. Because normally I hate that stuff, but that guy is a total sexist. It's so funny whenever he had to talk to a woman and he really proved it when Amy tried it. Because Amy is like the nicest, no matter how young she is, she's like the nicest mom who's just trying so hard to keep her kids, you know, on the right path. She's like, well, it looks like you may not be having so much fun. What's up, baby? She is the cutest. Even when she said it was talking around, he's like, well, honey, I said, you know, sometimes your attitude sucks. Mm. Yeah. I like that. Sometimes you have to make it fun. Now here's how to get spots off the mirror and smile while you're doing it. I love what she's supposed to say. Every spot is a bad feeling that you're getting mad at me or it's like, I'll tell me, uh, mom. I can't do this. Every time they show those clips of it's usually a before, you know, last week or next week, it's they're always showing Rocky having some breakdown, you know, like in the middle of a breakdown. And every time I see that I've forgotten what a nightmare she is, I just let it go. Like it's a little kid having a fit. You can't remember them all. And when I see them again, I'm like, oh my God, she did just jump off the boat last week. Yeah. It's crazy. She did that. And by the way, also, how did you appreciate Leon suggesting that the reason why there was a fire was because you were drinking. I didn't even know about that until I watched it. I had no idea. As I asked people, I was like, why did you get fired? I didn't even know how it all went down. And so nobody would tell me that he said that. So I was shocked. Wow. Was there a shock that you have a production staff that didn't tell you that? Normally they'd be like, uh, he just called you an alcoholic. Here's a knife and a can of peanut butter or a jar of peanut butter. Do whatever you're going to do. Yeah. We trust you. Go for it. No, they didn't. They didn't even tell me. Wow. We actually know one of your producers, Nadine, right? Oh my God. I love her. I love her. Yeah. I love that girl. We used to work at the same website. Oh, I didn't know she was on below deck now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She just started with the season. Oh my God. Good for her. She's done so many Bravo shows. I know. Man, she works so hard to like get excited. You know, she's so positive. She is high energy. She's hilarious. And we're so lucky to have her. Love that girl. She's super sweet. Nadine Rajabi. Yeah. Well, she does those bathtub interviews with the Shah's of sunset. I'm surprised that she would see. I guess she can't do it for her own shows, but those are really funny. Have you ever watched those on Bravo TV? Yeah. And actually, I also went to her website and watched her stand up, which is hilarious. Yeah. She's so, so talented. She used to write the news portion at TV Gasm. She was like the news sign, so she would just write, make fun of news stories every day. Love. Oh my God. Little Percy. My little Percy. Great. Remember how I said the season's like, you can tell it's like great editing. I think it has a lot to do with Nadine. Wow. Yeah. She's funny. That makes so much sense because it looks like somebody funny is doing it. It's like a dick shot every week, like some of the little things that she's, oh, I'm going to, I'm going to Facebook her. We should ask that. That's a sign of real friendship when you send a Facebook and you're like, heart. Yeah. Tell, tell Nadine that we want to be guests on the next season. We want to be yacht guests. Okay. Cool. Let's do it. You guys might have to wear like a mustache and a disguise. Yeah. I can do that. Otherwise, yeah, let's totally do it. Yeah. Because it's totally real. Okay. So last night's up. And close everybody will recognize this. Yeah. You don't want them to think you're biased in any ways. Yeah. No, I'll be ordering everyone around. I want my orange juice and I want it now. I'll just be like sitting in the master suite with a blanket, like making funny people through the window. I'd be like, I don't want to go out there, don't make me. Okay. So Kate, you've already been talking to us forever. And by the way, thank you because we'll keep you on here. Like it'll be a mini series by the time we're done. So you know that we are crazy and we just blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. When you have something to say, say it because otherwise you'll be over, talk, don't let us over talk. Yeah. And if you have to, and if you have to, and if you have to go at some point, that's cool too. Like don't worry. We'll, you know, so don't feel. Okay. I'm going to let you guys do your thing. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So Ronnie, you do it with us. Just don't be afraid to like talk because you know, I'll never shut up. Okay. I'll will interject. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. You got to ring that doorbell and no one's going to answer Kate. Starfish. Why aren't you talking to me? Hey, starfish. Why, why don't you let me on the podcast star starfish? I tried to move on with Beline, but then he flew away. Hi, Beline. Bye, Beline. I'm not holding anything against you. I always hold this day in my heart. Oh, how are you crab? Are you going to wait for me for your podcast? I've been your podcast starfish won't let me have. Okay. I feel really guilty when we talk about Amy because she's so sweet and I really like her and we make fun of her so much. And I feel bad when she says things like, well, you know, I understand that I'm a maid. And like now she seems so aware and I'm like, Oh, no, I hope that she doesn't read stuff on the internet and people saying that and think that that's bad, you know, like I feel bad. She doesn't have like many haters at all. She's really adorable and in the next two episodes, which I've had the chance to see just today, she is just, I think she's the funniest one on the show, quite frankly. And I talked to her about y'all's blog, I was like, listen, they make fun of everybody. And I have to say, I love you, but the starfish thing's funny. Yeah, it's just, you know, it's just, we just use her as a jumping off spot like a character. It's not really bad hurt. Yeah. You guys go on tangents. It's cool. Yeah. All right. So there's some tension going on in there. And I meet the sexual kind, but we know what you mean. So you are the butter knife. Okay. So my first note is it's opening like bloodline. And I don't know if it's because I know you're in Florida, right, Kate? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So maybe that's why that was in my head because I knew we were going to talk to you, but I was like, oh, it's going to be a dark, mysterious episode because it's like, Oh, that intro is so, I was like, where is this coming from? What's this leading to? And then they just jump over into like, happy work time. Yeah. It was like, someone just died. It brother just killed somebody, you know, and then it's like, no one's awake yet. It's that beautiful time of the day no one sees because we sleep through the beauty or whatever. And then it's like, okay, time to clean the windows. You know, like, yeah, I totally noticed that Rocky looking over like she's thinking deeply about something, but it's totally happening. Yeah. Like, what is it? It's just like, it's just like colopy music going on to her head. Yeah. And they're like, just kidding. It's below deck. Like get up. Do that. There's just clean, but been impressed. So Ben was very unimpressed with the state of the refrigerators. And I was like, ooh, burn out of anything that you could say to Leon right now, that would probably be the harshest thing like the guy was a slob. You know, he was a, I can't even do it. I can't go from Leon to trying to figure out Ben's animaniac voice. Yeah, I can't. It's very hard to make these adjustments and all these accents and Bravo is just throwing more and more accents at us. And like, it's just hard to make these hairpin turns is like, uh, doing, that's, that's my thing. Ben, Ben went to a very posh boarding school and he speaks with like what they call the Queen's English. So you just have to like slow it down, babe, babe, this gal is a disaster. That's right. He's so speaks like Sophie and Anna, still not doing a very good job, but you know, it's a jumping operator. It's embarrassing. I'm still a weird laugh. I'm more concentrating on the laugh for now. Yeah, between that and the rocky laugh, it's very difficult. I still can't do rocks. That's it. Rocky has so many put on personalities and I'm not really sure which one to even pick. I think the real one is the one where she's sitting and being interviewed and her talking heads where she's talking to her invisible parents who are above her that she could never please. I think her real personality is when Eddie is ignoring her and she gets pissed off and she stops being the drama camp girl and she gets that she's glowers and gets really angry and she's like, you know, that's, I feel like the real rocky right there. That does suck though. I don't think she's being immature. I mean, yeah, I don't think you still shouldn't just like fuck some crazy girl in the laundry room and then just dump her when she's not popular. I actually agree with that. I mean, Kate, maybe you can tell us that there's more to within that, but I, I feel like Eddie is actually being a dick to her and you know, even though she's crazy, he knew that he should have always known that and he's, and he's the one who's, he's, he's the one in a dysfunctional relationship with the two of them. I was so shocked when I heard they were hooking up. I really was. And I, I didn't think any less of rocky and you know, it happens. I've hooked up with people I didn't really think I should have in hindsight on boats cabin fever is real, but yeah, I don't think Eddie handled it the best. Yeah, just because that's not nice. You heard a girl's feelings and you just used her for sex at the end of the day because it's not like he was surprised that she was crazy. She had already been crazy, you know, yeah, it's almost like he's, he's gaslighting her gas lamping, whatever it is. Yeah, gaslighting totally. She's already crazy, but like you can see her actually being hurt. And I think that I feel bad for her making a crazy person crazier. Yeah. Um, but you know what's funny to me about Eddie is that the first two seasons, Eddie was always the most responsible one and, and he's still responsible, but seeing this dysfunctional relationship playing out that he has with this girl, Amy, I think, right? It's, it's surprising to me, you would think he would just have like a good, like happy little relationship with a little picket fence or whatever. And she cheats on him and he's like, I can't fucking trust you. I can't trust you at all. There's lots of, then he goes and sleeps with Rocky and he's like, yeah, you know what? We all make mistakes. I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, don't be that guy and I'm surprised you are that guy. Yeah, he's full of surprises, isn't he? Yeah. Who the fuck? Cause, uh, he's at the end of the day, he's a male. Go figure. Yeah. Cause that's kind of how I think of him. You know, he's like, you cheated by a big, but you're still calling every day to fight. So there's something going on. Like if you're still calling me to yell at me about cheating, you're obviously, okay, is this girl even real? Cause you know him in real life. Cause I feel like she's the girlfriend from Canada in South Park. This is just not there. No, actually, I met her and she's gorgeous and adorable and I love her. And that's another reason I was so shocked that Eddie hooked up with Amy because, or Connie, his girlfriend, who's also named Amy is nothing like Rocky. Well I would hope not. Oh my God. No, I mean, who is? Let's face it. But also, and now the whole season, Eddie was telling me like, I always felt so bad for you. I can't believe you have to have her as your third stew. I've got your back, and really, he was banger in the laundry room the whole time. Yeah. Yeah, that's, he did still, he did still, you know, come back to his original love. The rules is like, wait a second now, I can't be, I can't be having sex with non rules. He freaked out. He's like, I can't do this anymore. I don't know if it was guilt or the crazy or what, or maybe it just doesn't need to have that much. I can't imagine that having sex with Rocky is that great only, I mean, she's so pretty and everything. So I'm not saying anything about that. But I just imagine the whole time she's that kind who's going to laugh the whole time or be like, yeah, I just feel like she'll be seeing lies and manelli stuff. Like next, you know, it's like, she's climaxing while she's blurring out stuff. Yeah, we're doing it, we're doing it. Maybe next time he'll hit the G spot. Maybe next time I'll come tomorrow tomorrow. Well, one thing we learned in song improv class is that it's more about a feeling and not a plot. And I just wish I could have told Rocky because all of her music is just so literally you guys like, who wants to sit through that improv show? It's like, I'm I your name, I'm my your name right now. No, it's like very aligning, it's a false out of you, you know, like, bring us some feeling to it. It's not just literal. I'm getting some water. Eddie's inside me. Oh, like, what are you feeling? Yeah. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. I mean, it's up her ironing song game, but she did get those sheets, iron kate. 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They're just like very subtle, like a lot of stones and beges. It's really my vibe for fall 2024. Upgrade your wardrobe with pizzas made to last with Quince. Go to quince.com/crapins for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. It's quincy.com/crapins to get free shipping and 365 day returns, quince.com/crapins. I mean, yeah, she eventually learned. It took her a while. She did it like with complaining, but I was glad she finally did it. Well, you know, even a broken clock is right two times exactly that was the saying I was looking for. It's like horse to water. No, that's not it. It's really about like you put a thousand on a real type of something. Broken clock. I like broken clock on that one. Yes. So now we're on scene one. Yeah. Ben is unimpressed with the state of refrigerators. Hilarious. Okay. New deckhand and I wrote down made in a suit. I love a made in a suit. There's nothing better than someone coming in to get a waiting tables job dressed to the nines. And I love that because it's like, I dress like, I don't know. I like it. And that guy is so cute. I love him. He did. Game point. I saw who it was. I was so excited. Yeah, he did gay. Well, he did. He wasn't like a one and done, right, Kate? Like he did a lot of gay porn, didn't he, Dave? I didn't really know him until this season. I didn't get to know him that well, but yeah, I have heard that he had a career prior to. Yeah. Yeah, he had a full on career. He wasn't like one of those, you know, like dick pics gone wrong or whatever. He was good at a so cute and nice. Oh my God. Yeah. It wasn't like I need to pay the rent just this one month. It was like, I'm into this. Yeah. Yeah. It was like, I'm hot. And, you know, if you can make some money sucking a dick, why not? Yeah. It's so funny how it's viewed so differently in the for in the gay industry because people are like, Oh, wow, he's a gay porn star. That's awesome. He owns a business. He's in an industry and women like can't get hired at the bank or whatever. Yeah. So wrong. It was surprising that he came back. I was surprised it was like a throwback to season one. So but he does seem really not married. Isn't he married? Didn't he get married? I think so. They said in the beginning, like he got engaged in the laundry room. I mean, that's come on. Like via Skype. Yeah. Yeah. That's right. They haven't. I don't think they've gotten married yet, but they are very excited about it. Yeah. So cute. Okay. So he's coming. Oh, yeah. Dave, I got engaged in the laundry room, but I'm still hot. Oh, he's like, Hi. I'm still hot. Good to see you. Everyone's like, Wow. That's guy. Forgot how charming this guy was. Yeah. But he needs to work on the facial here though. It's like very Dave Navarro and not in a great way. I think. He does look like Dave Navarro. I was trying to remember who he looked like. Yeah. It just occurred to me right now. Just as I said, I was like, it's Dave Navarro. Say it, Ben. Get it out there. But I mean, it's not to not I don't like to harp on people's physical appearances that much. But when something you can be something that can be fixed, like just by a simple shade for a little shave, especially as a gay man, if you're a gay man and you and you look as good as that, I mean, why, why sell you like just just as you can't like if people see a hot person and then they see the hot person again, they're automatically devalued in their mind. You know what I mean? Like, that's why people that's why porn hubs popular because you can't just watch the same porn every day, right? Yeah. You have to see something new at all times. So he's got to keep it fresh. You can't just always look. He's got to have different facial hair organizations every day to keep people looking. You know, you don't want to get devalued as a hot person when you've got that a face like that. It's so hard. It's so hard being hot. You're doing it for service. Yeah. Mix it up. Keep it fresh, fresh face. All right. Um, so a meal. So a meal, of course, is immediately like, oh, another man I could have done this myself. I wish I had a lady in my room. Hey, to masturbate to 16 times a day. When he said that I was so grossed out about how he jerked off six times that day. How can he hide that in the boat, did he or do people just like figure, oh, meals jerking off again? Just, you know, I'm just, I was shocked when they like showed like the night cam and like there's movement under the sheets. I was shocked at that. And I was really shocked when he was like full on admitted it to Leon. It's like, oh, nobody wants to hear about that. And second of all, I don't think I could even do something like that on the boat because like it's not a very sexy place, like the top bunk of a boat below deck with like a bunch of crewmates. Really nearby. That could be hot. I would have, yeah, that I was like, that sounds extremely hot. Oh, okay. It's his turn. Take a turn. We've taken a turn. Okay. Yeah. Really horny people who can't get laid stuck in a place they can't get out of with me. I can't. Wow. Jail actually sounds not so bad. If I could get sent to like one of those nice jails where you still like maybe I can go to Pilates and stuff and like start looking better, like it sounds good to me. I could find a boyfriend. It's like an ashram in India that you don't have to travel as long to and people have a shower. Yeah. Actually, it's a lot like yawding jail, I think, but at least in jail, you don't have to work. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. You just have to take a class. I think you do though. Don't they make? Well, you can. I think they say they make license plates in jail. That's like what that's like the grandma thing to say like, well, someone in jail made that. Yeah. Yeah. And Martha Stewart made stuff and well, she made ponchos or something. Okay. And she was a parentess in jail. She made her entire Martha Stewart living Kmart collection in jail. Yeah. Well, she paid her child workers probably about as much as they get paid in jail. I think they get paid like six dollars and I mean six cents an hour or something like that. She recruited her inmate. She's like, hey, when you guys get out, you want to come work for me? They're like, sure. Or while you're in here. In turn is. She just had. She turned the entire jail yard into like a big internship program. So yeah, that sounds really hot to me. But yeah, a meal grows and I just thought how many people had to deal with the sounds of a meal masturbating because that's not like a shy masturbator. So many walks in and he's like, oh, I just rubbed six out in a row. How about you, chef? Yeah. And the closest part was it was in the galley and like Leon's like using his hands like make something in a bowl. And I was like, this is just too suggestive. Yeah. You know, someday I'm scared for a meal for the day that he winds up at a job where there's a human resources because half the shit he said on this show, it's like, wow, you would be fired from many, many places. Yeah. Yeah. Where is he? Some of these guys, I think are just maybe people who didn't have parents and just ended up kind of wandering around and finding a yacht to work on like a meals like that. And so was Dane. Dane was like, yeah, I'm a wealthy kid, but like, you know, the important thing is like, here I am. And like, sun's out, say everything's cool. It's like, what? Who is it? Where did they find this guy? Yeah. I have no idea where I came from. He didn't last long. I think some of our charter guests had actually more screen time than Dane did. Yeah. Well, he's certainly left with a bang. You know, that's, that's, you know, well, um, so actually that leads me to a quick question. How do they cast this show when they need people? Is it word of mouth through you guys? Like the great vine of who actually can do the job because this isn't something they can just hire casting office in LA for. I think they try all avenues. Like I have gone about four people on the show now, Connie, the season, um, Logan from last season, um, uh, Dawn actually, I know he was seemed a little bit silly, but he is good at engineering. Unfortunately, that wasn't his job. Um, who else? Somebody else can't remember right now. Yeah. Well, he, yeah, he just, um, yeah, if that was his job, he seemed okay. He just seemed really royalty like, Hey, hey, what's going on? Ha ha. It was very Jersey. It was like very New Jersey. Oh my gosh. Why doesn't anybody know how to lift that? Ha ha. I'm only one who knows how to lift it. All right. Give me a, give me a compass. Give me a compass. Yeah. I made, I made housewives taglines for the entire casks. We did the housewives and, uh, Don's was building muscle of the science. That makes me a scientist. Wait, did you give fonts to people this season yet? I haven't even fonts because I just felt like I was like going back to something old. I gave them Greek gods. I gave them housewives housewives taglines. I gave them emojis. That one was really good. And then, uh, we have something coming up on the reunion. Oh, that's exciting. That's very exciting. So you guys already filmed the reunion. It's done. Uh, no, actually I'm going down this Saturday. Ooh. Is it, is it going to be in, I guess you probably can't say, but is it, I, is it going to be like last seasons where it's just, you, you just did it in the, in the clubhouse, right? The Watcher happens clubhouse. Yeah. Actually, we're not filming in the clubhouse this year. Oh, you guys are garagey. Yeah. I know. I don't know exactly where we're filming, but it's not the clubhouse. And I'm actually kind of nervous because it's like, I was rocking going to throw something and there's no body of water for her to like jump into when that she doesn't want to talk anymore. So what's she going to do? Like cartwheel off the stage. I don't know. Yeah. I just hope they don't do it on a boat and then make you guys clean up after after yourselves. Oh, great. And now clean up. Yep. Let's turn this boat around guys. I think she's going to do the entire evolution of a housewives, uh, woman through like five seasons in one reunion. She's going to show up really confident. Like she has it all together, giving squinty eyes to you, but laughing really vibrantly when Andy asks her anything. And then slowly she's not going to be able to control herself. And then she's going to her bitch flower will bloom and she's going to go apeshit and then apologize. It'll be like an entire housewives in one hour and I can't wait. Yeah, it'll be good. It's going to be a nice meltdown. I have a feeling and I cannot wait to see Andy meet Rocky. Oh my God. That's going to be, that's going to be a lot of, a lot of craziness right there. A lot of, a lot of big eyeballs. Um, so Bertha from Bermuda wants to know, whoa, why do you keep taking off your clothes? It seems really slutty slash tacky. Ooh. Okay. I can't wait to see her. Andy's just going to be like, so Rocky, are those boobs real? Is that mermaid tail real? Do you get anything done? Great. Hi, Rocky. Hi, Kate. Hi, Mio. Um, that's going to be really fun. So you're doing it in New York, right? Uh, I can't say, Oh, secret, the secret location will show up to the same lobby of the best Western at the same time. Oh, so you know, so now you know, you weren't supposed to say anything. Oh, okay. So this cute kids meeting everybody on the boat, uh, and Kate says it's like a dream come true. Good manage. Oh my God. When you had the management meeting and it was nice, like that's a true management meeting. That's all you need to, like climax right there. It's like a good management meeting. It's so true, just getting it now, a beautiful management meeting. Just anything would have been bad, a relief from Leon. So it was really nice to change your pace. That's for sure. I'm still mad about the protein shakes that he didn't get. That still bothers me, actually. Mm hmm. I mean, I had a meal here that whole time, the guy can't even use what's right in front of him. All right. Um, I just wrote weird seeing Kate smile so much. So I love this part of it that you guys are like Sam and Diane, yeah, you're like the crazy version. Why do we? I don't know why. That's literally what my mother said. That's exactly what my mother said. You guys. Well, yeah. It's cuz I'm old. I'm like, so fast. You're like, well, so, so far we've compared you to Diane and to Carla. So I don't know how we're going to get Cristiali into this. It's 20, 15. Well, actually, I think that's the one my mom said. So now we've got them all. We've got the angel here. And you are a little Lilith too. So you kind of are like all the women of cheers mixed into one. That's the best compliment I've ever gotten in my life. It's a really. Do you remember Lilith's first episode when they first brought Lilith on, which she was a TV shrink and she was fighting with Frazier on some TV show. They were getting into this really heated argument and they hated each other, but then they started playing footsy and she became like this total Tigris. Yes. And that's kind of what this episode was. This was your like, the minute Ben came back, you were totally Lilith taking off the bun and like whipping that BB Newworth air around and then like, you know, taking Fratious Billions. It's like, you go, come be a Lilith. Oh, gosh, you are the key to Fratious. Well, so tell me about this stuff with Ben. So have tell me about this stuff. So tell me, do you guys talk to each other a lot off the show? When is all this dating and hooking up going on, Kate? Actually, after we left the boat that we were on for season two, we stayed in contact and we're both in Lauderdale. I was in a yacht down there. He lives down there. So we just both like to have a good time and we both kind of have a reverent sense of humor. Yeah. So that's kind of our common denominator and like, yeah, we hooked up, but that was more just because we like to drink and make bad decisions sometimes. There's really nothing more than that. Yeah. Did it? Yeah, that's chemistry there. Like, is it like hard to date non yachties? It is. It really is because there's yachting kind of changes you. If you've done it for a while, it makes you like not have too many expectations or like too committed to anything and also like your way like for a few months at a time, right? So that's probably puts a strain on a relationship that I imagine only another yachty would really understand. Yeah. And also, like, I have a few friends that, you know, they understand, I don't question what they do while I'm at sea. They don't question what I do. But if it's good enough, it's always going to be there when you get back, right? That's true to me. I mean, that's what they say. But I always wonder like with that, because it's kind of like being an actor or something like that. We are away for a long time, but then when you're together, it's very intense. But I find that a lot of people are in those kind of lifestyles just because they don't want the traditional lifestyle of having someone around all the time or being in that kind of relationship. And what I'm asking is, what are you running from Kate? I ask myself that all the time. I'm running from myself. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah, there's lots of attractive people in yachting. So there's no shortage there, but land life is good too, kind of miss it. I'm kind of doing both. How often are you at sea during the majority of this? I can't remember if I did, but if I forgot the answer, if I did, generally you're supposed to stay on boats for like nine months a year, but that drives you mental. So I'd like to do freelance, so you go out for maybe a month at a time, come back and whenever you want to make some more money, you kind of have the power to choose. Oh, nice. I want it. Yep. A month about it is enough. I would think so. So let me see. Good management meeting, Kate coming. That's what I wrote. Okay. Oh, shit. Real housewives of Atlanta. Yeah. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. I love the music. And lovely is Noelle Cynthia's daughter. Oh, she's so cute. She is so cute. I mean, not to jump ahead, but like when she was crying at the end, I was like, oh, she's so nice. It was precious. Wasn't it? It really was cute. I think she has a very bright future as a future housewife. Oh, yeah. She's very traumatic because Ben's the nice. Ben's the nice one, obviously. When I saw it, I thought she was very nice, too, but at that part where she was crying and she's like, but not really crying, crying was very housewives. And she's like, let's all hug deeply. And I'm like, that little bitch just wants to hug a meal really hard. You don't need to give a whole, you don't need to give a whole speech about thinking your mom and sobbing. Okay. Just go hug a meal. He's like, he has a rose for you about to match your beauty. Yeah. I was like, did he Google that line? And also I get really awkward around people when they're crying. It's like, do I? I don't like really hugging people. Yeah. It's like, do I hug you? Do I pat you on your back? Like, do I look away? This is weird. You're surrounded by an ocean full of salt water. Zip it up! Why are your eyes leaking? It's weird. I understood why she's crying. I understood why she's crying because like the normal vacations that Peter probably takes are on is, you know, probably like the claim jumper or something, you know? So this is like a big step up for her. She's like, I don't want to go back to Atlanta. This is called the Dairy Queen, okay? She's like, I want to go to bar one again. What's your mom's pin number going? Go on. Yeah, she was really cute. But when it was the real housewives of Atlanta, I was like, oh my God. It's Cynthia. She's going to find the most popular person and then just follow them around and be like, yeah, you go girl. I'm surprised she just wasn't following you around like, you tell him, Kate. I actually was like amused that they were like, they took a tour of steerage essentially, you know? Like they were just like down there. They were like fascinated by everything and Claudette got down into the store. It's like, for some reason, I sort of, it reminded me of something that I would do, you know? Like, I just want to poke around and see things. Oh yeah. I guess do that before. And it's kind of great because like if the charter guys come down and see how tiny your rooms are, and then they might feel like really bad for you and tip you extra because it's like, look how bad our life sucks. But because I keep my room a disaster, I was like, oh God, I've got to go throw blanket over everything. I need an extra blanket to hide my mess. I don't even want to know what a meal's room is. Yeah. That's true. Oh my God. A meals room. It probably looks like one of those caves where, you know, like bats poop for thousands and thousands of years and they become like big guano, guano miles. Like big stalagmites of little baby meals hanging from the top of his bunk. Thank you. I don't know any words. Oh my God. Yes. It's like spelunking with a meal. Spelunking in his splooge cabin. Oh my gosh. Spelunking has never been a more perfect word. I'm going to call it spelunking from now on. Oh God. So when they were going over who they are and he's like, wow, this lady's a real house wives of Atlanta, she owns a husband who spends all our money. It's like, what can you possibly say? Okay. So then they come on and Kate you say, we're used to people needing the finest. So like we're not afraid of this. Like if they're divas. So what? Like we're used to having divas. And I thought, oh girl, it's not just that this is a diva. You got to feed these heifers that they're going to eat and then they're going to put like you've caught big fish in the sea, but you've never seen someone in fish net dancing around on a boat. Oh yeah, she did pull a fager. I guess she did. Yeah. Yeah. That's a classic fager move. And she even added the mermaid tail. So fruit loops and omelets. What do they want? Yeah. So they were right. They were reading their demand. Oh yeah. There's a huge list, huge list of food. Omelets with mushrooms and spinach, fruit loops, Fritos, chips, olive aisle seven at the local grocery store. Whatever. Just bring that. Yeah. It's like she just copied her Instacart to the order sheet. Gay guys, they're magnetic. Oh, so they were talking about Rocky. Oh, I put music stops while Amy blows up balloon. Ha ha. Yeah. Amy's be exciting moments of the episode. They're magnetic. You can't help but stare. Who did he say that about? The housewives. Oh yeah. I was like, of course he loves them. Yeah. Of course, the gay one's like, they're magnetic. They're amazing. Well, I mean, who knows where he's been pet. I don't know where he's where he's been for the past two years. So it's like, oh my God, civilization back in the water is so cute. I just want to hug him. Well, I'll go to shave him. Yeah. I want to like hug him and watch. No, I want to watch someone else hug him really deeply while I look on yearningly. Yeah. I think you can pay to do that. Yeah. Stay it. Don't delete. Oh, so they had to stay at the dot. I love when there's weather problems or something and the chef's like, bad news guys, we're stuck here because I can't rest the wind. Yeah. Really? And Claudia goes, this was the first serious Claudia moment. She goes, are you serious? What are you? It's windy. Like, what do you want them to do? I know. I love. She's ready to throw down. I love the yachra. By the way, I have to say on a week to week basis, I love when the show. It gets really serious about the, like, the boat leaving dock and coming into dock and I know it's a serious thing, but every episode they do act as if it's the Lucetania going down like, okay, here comes the dock, here goes the anchor, we go, oh, there's a line. Yeah. Everything's fine. Yeah. It is close to Concordia every episode. No. The music, the anchor is dropping, like, it is, and you guys fall for it. And even me, I'm like, put those deck hands. Well, they're going to make it. And I was there. Yeah. Is Connie going to be able to observe the anchor effectively? Oh, no. Yeah, she did it. She's still watching the anchor go down the chain is going very slowly down. I feel like a proud father watching his daughter watch an anchor for the first time. Mm. Amy, they asked for Pina coladas, which I don't know why I was surprised, but that seems like a very housewives of Atlanta thing that's more like Pina coladas and Amy's like, I will, I will make those like she got so excited. The thing about being a yachty is you got to know what people want before they get here. I have a blender ready and some pork rice and some cocaine. This is going to be a good time, guys. Don't forget the umbrella. Yeah. I love her. Okay, so Emil likes to get attention from the women because these women do not mind a guy overspilling a little bit because Emil has been getting depressed on the boat. He's binging out like crazy. He's getting muffin top on the boat. Oh, my God. He eats Jesus. I'm it's like we're vacuum. How does he not insight his gag reflex like it is this full fist in his mouth? I know he's like a cave man and he doesn't even chew. It's like he probably poops out giant subs. Well, I like that his sexy uniform for waiting under women outfit was like it was basically like Billy Ray Cyrus 1991 tank top into tucked into the jeans. I was like, this is not sexy at all. This is where like mom jeans. I don't know if that was. I know. It's like once again, Emil falling short of the sexy potential that he has way. That's what I'm saying. It's like he doesn't have parents or any friends or anybody. No one was ever there to just be like dude, close your mouth. It's like when you find one of those little children from the wild and they're like, you know, scratching the wood floors and you know, he's like the tuning can open. He's like the knell of hotness. He like doesn't know. He doesn't understand the language of being hot that he has this gift. He does have this gift, but he just can't speak it or translate it. He does. I think his hottest moment was when I dressed him up in a toga like he looked kind of good and he was all embarrassed. He was like and you know that you know some gays to Kate because you totally tied that above the muffin top. I remember I remember that because he was so insecure about it and you totally tied it off at the muffin top and I was like, that was a good friend and it was you. It's almost worse when you're hot like Emil because people expect you to have this body like with it and he does have a nice body and everything. He just got the little love handles and stuff so it like automatically puts him into that moment where you realize, wow, I can be sexist towards men and women because I'm like muffin top. Yeah. Sorry, buddy. Yes. And meals muffin top, the great equalizer. Yeah. Thank you. You see, you should write books. You're very good at editing down to just like five words. That's all I needed. Soundbikes. But actually I have seen a meal since then and he's gotten much more into shape and I think he's even posted on Instagram like I'm on below deck hashtag fatboy. Hashtag cringe. So I think he is a little embarrassed and that's why it's so embarrassing saying something about it because I'm a weight like I'm a, I have issues with food and weight and shit and I never stopped talking about it. So for me, it was just like happy that there's like a guy with the muffin top. But then I was like, oh my God, they're insecure too because when he got insecure, I felt so bad for him. I was like, see, even a straight hot guy can feel this sometimes. Yeah. Well, and also on boats, like my first boat, I gained like 40 pounds because you are bored and you're stuck and there's nothing to do and you've got a chef and there's surrounded by food. So you just eat and then you like the dream until you like take off your stretchy polyester blend uniform and go to point your real clothes and you're like, Oh, the sippers not working. I guess I'll stand the boat tonight. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I think that's pretty natural. But I just feel so bad because you like watch him evolve, but then he gets a reprieve from the real house. So as if Atlanta who are like, hell yes muffin top, bring it over here. Yeah. They love that. He needed that boost. He really did. He did. And he deserved it and he got it too. And that was so funny that they just treated him like a little bitch the whole time. Yeah. And they made him go shopping. They're like, come here. They even call him his name. Like, come here South Africa. I know. Like a little puppy. They're like, What do you think of this? How he's like, Oh, I think it brings out your eyes. I'm like, Hey, go with me all you found a found a token line just to say all of them. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe he learned that from the mother that he knew for one week, like that's what you say to women. You say, Yeah, before she before she left him in the middle of the wilderness to raise himself. American movie in the 90s and like thinks that Bruce Willis is the paradigm of gentleman behavior. Yeah. Exactly. It was Hudson. Maybe it was pretty woman. So he just assumes that everyone's a whore. He's like, Yeah, I've been thinking about putting my fingers in the old day. Oh my God. We taught you to talk like that to women. Let's go. Let's go close some divots. Laying. So gross. So yeah. So he came to serve the ladies looking all sexy. And I just thought it was so funny that they cut from that to talking about muffin tops. And now every time they do shit like that, I'm going to thank you, Nadine, Nadine Rajab Jabs. That's one of those nuances. And I knew you guys would appreciate that because it was not lost on me. Yes. I was like, there are so many muffin top jokes to be had here. I just can't even handle it. Yeah. So funny. So Ben's like, just trim them. Just trim them up and tops. So he's like, just, he's like, just clear away one of you just the muffin spill of right there. We just cleaned it up and she's like, sure, let me just chop the top off of all the muffins. It wasn't even, I still don't understand what she was doing. I still what that to me, when Rocky cut off the top of those muffins, it was like, that was the sitcom moment again. That was Rocky's sitcom moment. That was like Kevin on Mr. Belvedere being like, yeah, I did it for you. It's like, Oh, Kevin and the audience laughs. Womp, womp, womp. But Ben's handling of it was so funny. He's like, no, it's not your fault. That's my fault for giving you the job in the first place. There's that British humor. He's really good at making it seem like he's being nice, but really he's insulting you. Yeah, exactly. Rocky's like, well, the other chef trusted me. So I don't get it. Like this guy, like he doesn't even trust me. Like I'm a chef. I'm like, you served raw chicken and then granted on oysters and support. Which, by the way, I tried in real life last week. And it, I tried to like it. It is so bad. So that's a real thing that people are doing? No, but I just before I like slam her for such a crazy decision, I was like, I should probably try it. Maybe it's genius. And it is, I couldn't even, it was really difficult. Like someone was upset. You did such a foul combination of ingredients. That's like something that would be on Big Brother, you have to eat in order to like winhead of household. Okay, that is not what should be served on a yacht. It's a fear. It's a fear factor. It's a fear factor. It's a big fear factor experience. And then we get to, we cut to Ben beating Kate in the butt with a salmon. I wrote. Oh, yeah. A personal highlight, I'm sure. Well, you know, Ben and I, we fight and we flirt and neither situation is really serious. Yeah. Yeah. The ladies want a meal serving strawberries and everyone's texting. I just love them sitting around texting the whole time they're on the bow. I probably be doing the same thing. That's amazing. I'm like, I don't need to get on a jet ski. I have no interest in going on a jet ski. I have no interest in fishing for lobsters. I would be happy to sit there, enjoy this on beyond social media and have the lobster come to me. Yeah. That's all I need. You don't ever have to go outside and no one can give you shit for it and people are feeding you. What's not to love? So then we had a really cute Amy moment. Where am I? And Claudia? I raped him. No, that's too far down. Where are you, Amy? Yeah. Amy, the ladies want you to go down there and serve them a meal and they first they want you to stand here and just look me deep in the eyes and tell me something good about myself. And he's like, all right. I'll go to serve him. I'm like, darn it. He's my only friend, starfish, starfish. I got a tank top for you if you want to serve me strawberries. So Noel is sitting in the flat tub. In the flat tub. She's sitting in the hot tub. She's sitting in the thought tub is what she's doing. She's getting all sexy in the hot tub waiting for a meal. And I love that the way that she has learned to love a man from her mother is to order him around to get things because that's how you do it. Yeah. It's like you're using all my money. You better at least be bringing me some fucking champagne or I mean, no else got game. She's got some serious game. She was very comfortable with that. Wasn't she? Oh, yeah. Well, she got into jet ski and and they're like, you got something and she's like, oh, what? Just this? And she scrabs a meal. But she learns from the best how to spot a loser and get him tied down. She's like, that looks like a man who will treat me horribly and never make as much money as me. I'm going to marry him. Yeah. And then someday he'll come up with his own crappy version of coffee. So he can spend all of my money one day. Oh, man. Why do you think so many not good men get dates are girls desperate? Um, I don't know. Maybe it doesn't want a bad boy or they know, you know what I think it is? I think girls want to believe that they're so good. They can change them. Fix. Yeah. Yeah. But can you? I guess it does happen. I mean, every 80 sitcom or whatever the guy or every recent sitcom too, a lot of them like networks that comes are about the big dumb dad who will never grow up. It's like, yes, the wife with a bet with a thing of laundry being like, Oh, Tim, you'll never change. You still don't know how to do the laundry. Your father put dish soap in the laundry machine and now the whole place is stuck with bottles. Oh, wow. He'll never learn how to clean a muffin pan. Hmm. Thank God. Your dad goes to work every day. I guess. Yeah. I guess that is. Okay. Hang off. I'm not sure that show. Because this show, there's so many like service people stuck alone and wondering what the hell is going on in the world that I can relate to. I mean, that's me in my real life. So I don't know. It makes me like, where's my starfish? Yeah. Yeah. Everyone was just first starfish. Yeah. I feel like the first, the first half of the episode, everyone just sort of like, you know, like, Oh, okay, I did my job. So I guess we'll just stand around and wait for tomorrow and see what happens. It was like the big excitement was that like the wind went down. Let's, let's move the yacht about 50 feet away. We're going down the block. We're going down the block. And I love, by the way, it was the whole thing was like, well, we finally got a dock and women were like, oh yeah, we like to go into town. I'm like, you just got out of the dock. You just got out. Oh, the weather, it was the worst of our entire season with them. And it was like the stars that aligned because they were the only guests that really did not even care to be outdoors. Yeah. Just get them nice couches. Like we're going to go to a place with really nice couches, you guys, and they have Wi-Fi. Yeah. I think, I think one of our $20,000. I think one of our readers was amused by the fact that these women went on to a whole a big luxury yacht and they just wanted, you know, barbecue food, which by the way, I would totally have. But it is kind of funny to think that you're doing this luxury experience and you just want comfort food that you could probably get, you know, I'm sure Ben's was very good but you could probably get really good comfort food in Atlanta, you know. Yeah. But, you know, a lot of guests, they don't always have to want caviar. Yeah. Like Penny Pasta is a common order. Or chicken quesadillas. How many quesadillas do you guys make? Oh my God. It's a low-jack drinking game with quesadilla, you would be hammered. Did the producers tell the guests to order quesadillas? Is that like a thing? No. Do they say, hey, why don't you order quesadilla right now? My theory is that you've always got tortillas and cheese on the boat. So they're like, all right, craft services has some tortillas and cheese. Just offer, it's either that or Doritos. Just offer a quesadilla. I mean, it's probably really ironic that the guests figure they're being nice and doing ordering something easy and it always sends like the chefs and the crew into like a tailspin of like a quesadilla. Quesadilla. Yeah. Like an alarm goes off. You're there flailing at the alarm, trying to set it off. Yeah, the quesadilla alarm, it went off a few times. Yeah. So have a good old-fashioned barada quesadilla, oh my gosh. Is that even melt? I don't even know. It probably was. Barada sauce. It's like, sauce on. Everything melts. And I know, but there's so much liquid involved that I feel like that would like make the quesadilla a tortilla soggy. I don't know. It would melt, but it would also be like, it's a waste of barada that's just not the thing. Then it would just taste like melted mozzarella, like the barada's special because it's then it's delicate form. Oh, that's still so man. And then she was like mixing with feta and leftover porridge. Yeah, that was the real star. The leftover pot roast with feta. And barada. I mean, this woman, I don't, she should almost be on next season just so we see what other culinary creations they make. She makes it. No, I mean, she clearly loves to be in the spotlight. So there is a show called like, World's Worst Cook. Yeah. I think she should go for that one. Yeah. She gets a man for real teaching. She got breaking down at Ambrole would be hilarious because Ambrole would not take that show. She would not. Hey, zip it up. I don't want to hear it. Listen, your idiocy doesn't go in cooking. Okay. You do her. Ambrole would do her like summer camp counselor, angry summer camp counselor voice like, okay, well, what we're going to do now is we're going to take our, our, our pots and pans. And what are we going to do, Rocky? I guess we'll clean them. That's right. We're going to clean them. She'd be like, what did you do to these muffins? Those were my little babies. My lovelies. Yeah. I love them. So okay, Rocky. What we're going to do in the future now is when we see a muffin, we're not going to cut the top off, right? Rocky. Yes, Ambrole. That's right. Please get Ambrole as the chef on this show because Ambrole, I was so shocked on her. Do you even know who she is? No, I don't. No, actually, I don't. She's the, she's one of the hosts. She's that lesbian lady with big crazy. Guy Fieri here. Yeah. Yeah. She's like the lesbian Guy Fieri. Basic or Guy Fieri. From World's Worst Cooks. Yeah. So anyway, she has this thing on the Food Network. She's a Food Network seled and her show is the restaurant chef show. And so she's really nice and everything's like, I'm putting these beans in the oven. I love you, my little honey's. And then they started showing her on these competition shows and she's like a bitch on wheels. I love it. She is. Like she came out of the closet as like a bitch. I don't know. Yeah. It's great. She would be great on Blowdeck. Yeah. She'll do anything that one. Bring her on. Great. I always have a good bitch. We'll cast on this show. You got Connie on now. Oh, get her on that. Amber L. Amber L. Amber Ellis. Hey, Justin. Come on. I hope you like. Good bye, anchor. My little lovelies. Okay. So anyway, we're talking about Amber L. So, so, so, sorry. So, I was not expecting those. So they have the Blowdeck tour where Amy is showing everybody the storage. And she's like, Oh, no matter how much money people have, they feel right down down here because home is where the heart is. Also a basement full of SOTY POPS. SOTY POPS. That's what I wanted for Nolabar. Oh, it's just like having kids and a hose fan and they're damn in the basement. Still not paying attention to me. Come out of the pantry, kids. Kids. Let's see a backdoor in there. That's storage. That by the way, that storage looks very scary to me. I would have, I feel like I'm not claustrophobic, but I feel like I would have got, I would have got in claustrophobic if I had to crawl down into the nether regions of a yacht to get out some, you know, pastaroni. Oh, it's definitely the worst job. Like, actually they didn't show this, but when a meal is being kind of a brat to me, I'd be like, Hey, Amy, can you find me the emasculator pump? And he's like, well, where is it? I was like, I think it's in the bilge and he's like down in the bowels of the ship. He's like, Kate, where's I'm like, well, you know, the longer you look for the emasculator pump, the closer you get it. Keep looking. I don't know what an emasculator pump does, but it sounds like it's exactly what I think that you would want to do with some of these guys. Well, it sounds like something that, yeah, it's something I made up, but it made me laugh. Yeah. But actually, that's also something that a meal does in his top bunk every night, the emasculator pump. Yeah, I think so. That's why he's always pumping things. Last night, they showed him pumping. He's like, all right, the gay guy's all right, I guess, but I still rather jerk off to a girl. As long as like, I love to work, do you want me to like, lift anything, move anything? He's like, no, I got it. Just pump in. Just using the pump and pumping things really hard. He's like, OK, well, if you need help pumping, just let me know. All right. Thanks, mate. It's pumping hard. It's pumping six times before you got here six times, well, escalating. And when they were flirting with the meal and all the ladies were going crazy over a meal, and they showed Dave standing right behind them. And I'm like, why is it that no matter how hot he is, the bottom never gets attention at a party. Ever. No. He's just like sitting there. You've got one of the most gorgeous men on the earth standing there, and you're flirting with the meal. Come on. Oh, my gosh. You guys really like him. I just think Dave is so young and innocent that I can't even like imagine seeing him as sexy, but also he's gay, but he's just he's very childlike in his naivety and wonder. I don't think he's like that. I think he's cute. I think he's cute. He's cute. But I don't think he's so beautiful and angelic. I don't see that. It's not a sexy thing. I just want like he's so nice to me. He is so nice. He seems so genuinely nice and like I could be a televangelist and make a zillion dollars because he just looks so sincere and he's gorgeous and that's very rare when someone is that beautiful because usually they're like a little ripped up from the world treating them horribly or using them for sex, but he's like learned a way to make a living from that. I can't buy the fish. The fish. The fish is a real problem for me. Yeah. He must be from like Grand Rapids, Michigan because they're all like so nice. Yes, that is a nice person place. I can never marry anybody from there. And also he's so like angelic you kind of like want to corrupt him. Yeah. Well, he is a gay superstar. That is a sexy part though because you know who is that guy in gay porn that's like he's just the happy male man who fell on your dick. And no, he's the one who ordered the pizza or he's the pizza delivery guy, but he's like the kid who's like, oh, excuse me, sir. Our sink isn't working. Could you please fix the sink and then the plumber comes in and is like, well, do you have a shower? I got some grease on me. And he's like, oh, I guess it's right here. I guess I could turn it on for you. That's what I think it is. The sexy part is that he's just so nice. They should just make new porn that's really not even sexual. It's just people who are really hot being kind to each other. Yeah. Nice porn. I guess a Canadian porn is. Yeah. Pretty much. You look really good today. That dress, I can tell it took a lot of thought because it matches your eyes and it really brings out your entire spirituality into the world. Thank you for that. Oh, yeah. Mmm. So wait, so where were we in the episode now? I was watching complimentary porn, but it turned off by compliments. I thought it was free, but it just means they're nice. But that's kind of nice too. I'm still getting those records from Columbia House. I'm always getting tripped. Um, by the way, Kate, your laughter thrills me on the inside, I guess you don't really laugh. You go like this. If you really, if something will really get you, you'll go like this. It's, you know what? That's funny because I think I want to tweet it. I was like, I don't allow. I allow. I you do it so funny. I love it. You'll be like, huh, like, um, that's I laugh. Uh, rock equals to me. Lover and wines. Okay. So now crazy girl, the guys that she has dumped and treated like total dog shit for no reason. Well, not for no reason, I guess, but, um, not great. She's like, yeah, well, she's like, well, you know, you know, like, he's like my best friend on the ship. I mean, no offense. He's like, Oh, all right. I'm like, that's, that is kind of actually obnoxious. But yeah. And it is, it is total mind fucking. I think what you were about to get to that he is like hot for her. She's turned down a million times. And now she's going to come to him with her boy problems. I don't know. I think that's, that's a little cruel. But she's, she's like that tree in the forest. Someone needs to like see her fall. Yeah. I'm like, so only fall if there's someone there to hear it and in a mermaid tail. Yeah. I'm falling. I'm a tree and I'm falling. I'm falling in the forest. There's no wonder. Watch me. There's no wonder why open candy while I'm trying to see rocky. So rocky, um, in a musical in the middle of the forest on a boat. I like it. I like it. Spin off. Yeah. Spin off alert. Yeah. So rocky. Um, I don't, so I, now this is where I feel bad because I know that girls just get so much more emotional and I really started feeling bad for her when Eddie just stopped talking her. I mean, if you're crawling back to a meal, that means you're really hurt on the inside. Yeah. Well, she also has no one else to crawl back to because, you know, it's like a really lame episode of Survivor where she, she's been in this weird Leon Alliance. And now she just stuck with a meal because now no one on the, on the boat likes her. She picked the wrong side, wrong side on that one. Just saying. Just saying. It's pretty obvious saying. So then she hears, um, she hears Eddie talking shit about her with Dave in the bedroom. And he's like, last week, dude, she took off her clothes, fucked me in a laundry room, and then took them off again and jumped into the ocean. Like she's nuts. And that's all rocky heard. And this was very 80s movie because that's all she heard. And she, she ran up the stairs to like cry face down in her bed or whatever. Yeah. I was like waiting for like the synth, like electric piano score to kick in to make you feel sad, you know, the keyboard boss, Nova. Yeah. Exactly. She's like, get some makeover and changes her whole style just to be in with the cool kids, but then they were never saying that in the first place and she just feels dumb in the end. And then she gets with Eric Stoltz. Hmm. That's how everything should end with Eric Stoltz because you know, Eric Stoltz, you come home at the end of the day and Eric Stoltz is like, Hey, you know, he's like one of those. He's just like sitting on the couch, like no matter what you say, he's just all calm. Yeah. Yeah. So I felt bad because she ran away after hearing them talking about her, but it really wasn't that bad because he was saying, yeah, she was a crazy bit. But then Dave said, yeah, she sounds like I'd be best friends with her. Yeah. She's a crazy bitch. Sounds great. So she missed that. And then Eddie was like, yeah, she is entertaining. You know, she missed a good part, but it's still like they were boning and now he's acting all weird to her. And then he's telling the new person that she's in that case like, that's that is pretty hurtful. Even if you're a crazy bitch like Rocky, that is pretty hurtful. I know. I just wish you heard the end where they weren't being mean, you know, if only poor Rocky. Well, not only because it was Dave and his Canadian issue, Michigan, he can't say anything to me ever. Yeah. Yeah. You should have waited, she should have known it was coming because he's like from happy grand rapids. Yeah, you could be like, um, yeah, we're pretty sure that she's a serial killer. I'm like, ah, what a festive girl. What does someone with dedication commit this? Yeah. Russian. Yeah. I'm from Texas. So when people are like that, I'm defensive because I feel like they're really saying something else because you know, it's like the southern way like, well, you know, she just has a difficult brain God bless her heart when you're like, that's a crazy bitch. Yeah. There's nice ways. But he's not being southern. Being so like sweet, like he means it hugs, hugs to you a little sweet guy because then she's bitching to him at one point and saying, like, everyone hates me. This job's stupid and kiss a batch. And he's like, well, Kate's a tough nut to crack. Wait, was it Kate? He was talking about the tough, not to crack, but she'll come around. Don't worry, kid. And I was like, a gay guy who's resisting the urge to like talk shit in the laundry room. I know. Bravo. That's a problem for us. Very strange. He's the nicest gay man on the planet. Yeah. For sure. He needs to be with someone poisonous like me because you always want to bring Superman down. You know, like you can't shoot him and you can't beat him up, but maybe you can make him feel so bad that he just will never fly again. Let's try it out, Dave, only from my number in the show notes. So was this, so I feel like coming up next was this when there was charcuterie gate when Kate, you created the world's largest charcuterie plate and filled everyone up before sushi time. Oh, please. He's such a diva. He just wanted a reason to like get mad because first of all, it wasn't that much cheese. Second of all, there was another appetizer he made up there. And third of all, if they don't want to eat, I wasn't forcing them to eat it. Yeah. Do you guys eat the sushi that he made? Okay. I do admit this though. I was like, oh, too bad. The guests are going to eat it. I guess we have to have sushi because quite frankly, I had not had a good meal on that boat the entire time because of Leon. What was it he cooked for a crew for a crew meal? He made, um, he would have like frozen salmon and he made so many salmon meals that one day Connie took all the leftover salmon out of the crew fridge because people got tired of eating it and made a salmon castle on the crew mess table. I'm surprised you guys didn't get like mercury poisoning. Yeah. Me too. He was slowly trying to kill us. That's what was happening. Yeah. I was going to say that might take some time to even know he might have done that and you wouldn't even know for a couple of years. We are like long order. We just cracked that case. Yeah. We're figuring out so much this podcast. I really know. We're getting right to the bottom of it. We're getting below deck. The, um, so I wrote, I don't know what this means, but I wrote, um, likes Pete Keaton. Where's the last wet pillow? I don't know why I wrote that. Oh, because there was a pillow though, honey, what was going on? There was like, I think that was one of the awkward interactions with Rocky where he was like looking for a wet, he was like, I think he walked in and he was like, there's a wet pillowcase that needs to be changed or something like that and Rocky, he like didn't say how to Rocky. If I, I don't know. I could be wrong. Yeah. There's no super awkward moment because Rocky was talking to a meal and Eddie like caught him. I think, I think it was more Eddie's guilty conscience. Like, Oh God. What are they talking about? Yeah. So he was like, which he's totally right to of course, I mean, they did it on TV. This is, this is obviously the most, the most dramatic episode of the season. Wet pillows, shark rooty plates overflowing with meats filling people up. The feelings and wet pillows, episode 11. Normally that would have been a very dramatic episode, but after like fire and the jumping off the boat, I mean, there's really not a lot more we could do other than sink the boat to top that. I don't think you can top it. My favorite part is slowly watching people fall apart. That's my favorite part of any show. And this one, we've got a meal totally falling apart and Rocky, the worst obviously, obviously. I mean, she came on, she came on apart. She's kind of like a piece of Ikea furniture that you just never figured out and it's just sitting in a heap, making you crazy. Oh my gosh, that's like where the saying a few screws loose came from, I think. Like she, so Ikea furniture that came missing screws. Like didn't have the little thing. It's proprietary. Yeah, proprietary screws that you need, one of those little L wrenches. And like the instructions were in a different language that nobody could speak. Everyone's like, what is this arrow pointing to? What does this thing fit into this? Why is it? Wow, this, this furniture is so dramatic and so cheap. Let's get it. Never put it together. And use it for nothing. Yeah, exactly. And as we say this, I'm looking at my Ikea, like media stand, the door that's on crooked. And then I look to my right and I see my Ikea filing cabinet where the handles are, don't even align. And I dress me nuts. Rocky is the dresser that doesn't even open, but it's like, you need a dresser in your room where you know what she is? She's like the demo TV in Ikea when you look in the living room and there's like a TV with like a picture that's like taped onto it. That's what she is. She's like the dresser that the drawers don't open, so you just like lay the coats and clothes on top of it. But that's like, so it is kind of functioning, but not the way it's supposed to. She's like the I crappy Ikea silverware where it's like, what person could ever stay up or scoop something up with this piece of shit silverware? This crappy Ikea silverware. Oh my God. Um, she's, I think probably she's, uh, I don't, I don't, I can't go into any more Ikea furniture. I'm like, I can go. I can go in. I'm literally looking around. I'm looking around my house and I'm like, Oh my God, none of this does work. I'm living inside of a rocky, like this entire and poorly put together an earthquake. I'm going to die. Any month. That's why she's terrifying. Yeah. Yeah. Well, it's like all those Ikea chairs, even if you do get them together, it only takes a week before they're wobbling, you know, they're going left and right already pre-earthquaking for you. But you already spent so much time trying to put it together that you're just like, whatever. Yeah. Yeah. You're invested. You taught her how to, you, you taught that thing how to hire a iron, a fucking fitted sheet. Okay. You're invested. It's on top of it. Then so be it. Yeah. Exactly. Um, so I've never done anything to him. Yeah. And you know what? Rocky, I felt bad for her because not only did she not do anything to him, she really didn't. But she could have because Rocky is that crazy girl that you sleep with and then pretends she's crazy, like she's pregnant with like a tiny little manager, you know, like you can't break up with me. I've got, you know, your assistant manager in my stomach, you know, she could have gone really crazy. Yeah. Morning sickness. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. I can't wear a pregnant lady. I can't work because I've already jumped off the boat. I'm on a different boat right now. There's a fetus in my tummy. He's already telling me what to do. I am a Mascalator pumped in a Mascalator pump. I love that that's a real thing, by the way. I'm so getting that for Father's Day. So then, so then next what happened was, okay. So Amy's like, well, Kate, Kate, there's something different about you. You're glowing that love. Be careful. Other things that make you glow nuclear waste sometimes in the end when you're glowing. That's when you're about to be hurt the most. Watch out. Kate. Kate is one of the glow sticks from a white party a few weeks ago, break on your face because you're glowing. I want to make sure we wipe that off. Hey, you know, Ben knows how to use the wave runner right. He could get out of here any time he wants, be careful. I was just so like, okay, Amy, I see you want to have this conversation, but I mean, I'm just glowing because I'm glad I'm not around Lee. I'm like, I would be glowing if they had brought a monkey into her place. I'd be like, oh, this life is good. Yeah, thank God. Thank God. No deal. Also, Amy just, Amy has the need for a girl talking. You know, she's a girl's girl. She wants to be like, Hey, what are you feeling inside right now? What are they saying? What are they saying? What are they saying? Let's talk about it. Let's talk about it. I understand. I understand. Just like my slumber parties. Hey, Mr. Barnacle, you look like you're real happy today. Did you find a good thing to latch on to? Yeah. I feel the tantrum between you and that ship. You can come each other's hair and you can talk about being and I can talk about the balloons. It's not paying attention to me. She's so cute. And your version of a girl talk is like, he's a hot asshole. Like, what else? Like, what else do you want it out? I was so fun Kate. Let's do this again. Um, so then the first day in AMA and then that's in her cut with Ben and Rocky talking about that. Okay. I mean, talking Ben and Rocky talking Ben and Kate. So there you go. It's very complex scene. So then, um, so then the women all they, they, they get full. They go to sleep and then day two, they're out out in the ocean, um, and it's still like nothing has really happened. I think that's when Noel goes jet skiing, right? She goes jet skiing. She gets, she gets to cop a feel on a meal. The women go into town. They go shopping. They start. They boss the meal around like, set the Africa. Look at this boring. It was all just like, you know, it's like pleasant, fine, you know, nice stuff. It was like a typical Cynthia Bailey scene. They're like, look, people are shopping and then they're like, look, earrings. Wow. Wow. Look, a necklace. Whoa. And then Cynthia's like, I'm going to try this on. The music's like done, done, done, done. She's trying it on. I guess. Fast forward. Yeah. Let's get to the rock, man. All right. Comparing weiners to comparing muffin pops when she was describing her, cutting the muffins and getting into trouble. She's describing it today. Hilarie. Let's just point out. Okay. So clearly I see some like, bottled man rage when she's describing it like a penis. And she's like, and I just cut it off right there. And then also when she was like, buttering that guest banana, she's like, Oh yeah, I'm going to butter your banana. And then she's like, chopped it like there. I could see why Eddie was scared because every time she's like, making phallic references, then she has to cut something. That's true. And by the way, that's everything I kill. That's the totally lifetime, total lifetime movie. Listen, anyone with that laugh, you got to know anyone without laughs going to chop off a penis. Okay. She's like a little troll under the bridge or like a charger from labyrinth. I mean, don't trust that lady with your penis. She really is a lifetime movie. Like you could just see it happening. Hmm. You wouldn't run. You know how like the first three quarters of a lifetime movie is always the woman being terrified and running. And then she gets strong and like finds a way to kill the guy without going to prison. She's like that, but she's just never afraid. She's like, Oh, I met she would be like the villain. Oh, yeah, maybe she would be the one like trying to kill the wife so that she could get the husband. Exactly. Yeah, she would be one of the other Tracy Gold. And then she's going after Cameron Mathison and she's laughing and trying to cut off penises along the way. And someone like, I don't know, Linda Hunt, not Linda Hunt, but like, not on lifetime. Linda what's her face. I forget her name anyway. I think it's Meredith Baxter Bernie. And then she finds out that she, the baby that she put up for adoption decades ago is now alive and working on a boat. And so they find each other, but then it turns out to be rocky. And then rocky starts trying to take over Meredith Baxter Bernie's life. Yeah. That's exactly it. That is totally. I'm musical. Yeah. Yeah. And the whole time she would just be like, is she crazy or just funny? She's just funny. And then it turns and acts three and you realize that Rocky is trying to kill everybody. Well, I'm going to kill you. Her big climactic scene will clearly be that she ties someone up to a chair and she has a knife and then she starts singing a song, you know, it'll actually be very much like sideshow Bob with Bart Simpson tied up. And he does like his whole performance on the boat that one episode, she'll just be singing an entire song and then that's one Cameron Matheson comes in or the lady. I don't know, I don't know which one she ties up, but the other one comes in and knocks Rocky down and she gets sent off. Well, she's going to kill the person, but she gets so distracted because she's got such high like ADD levels that she's like, she gets the knife to the throat and then like, it's like, oh my God, I'm going to go sing in that corner by myself. Yeah. And then you come and you're like, Rocky, just finished the job. And she's like, I can't believe kids always making me do this. I don't want to, I don't want to kill her anymore. God, that was the funniest lifetime movie killer. I've ever seen in my life. I've never seen a lifetime movie where they didn't actually get killed at the end because I got too lazy. And then Kate, you just come in and you just, you just finished the job. You're like, Oh, I'm always doing rockets work. Yeah, I always have to do everything around here. And Rocky jumps the water. I just need to be the water. And then Amy comes up to the decapitated head, hey, hey, oh, not that talkative today, are you? All right. I'm going to take you out to the water. I'm going to just drop you in the ocean. I want to talk about our relationship, Hey, Ed. What's in the box? Hi, it's Gwyneth's head. Hi, Ed. I thought we just wanted to make you so nice. I know you feel Gwyneth. This is like being on Christmas morning because you're in a box and I opened you up. It's a gift. It's Gwyneth's head. I've never seen that movie Kate, the head in the box. What's it called? Six. Seven. Seven. Oh, no, I've heard of it though. Seven deadly sins and Gwyneth and Brad are married and ends with like her getting up, him getting her head in a box. We ended up on lifetime and a head in the box. Yeah. I'm pretty sure that Leon was all of the seven sins, combining one person, like black knee, lazy, whatever. He was definitely a guy. Actually, let's go through them. Let me. I know that one. That's my favorite. Leon was definitely the guy in the beginning of the movie who was fed spaghetti until he exploded. He was fed frozen conks and Cheetos until he just choked to death and he was like I'm saying how disgusting it was but finished the entire thing and looked at the bowl. That's how we do. Okay. I thought it was really funny that I've just assumed this all the time he was divorced and then someone was like no, I think he did. He's like I've got a family. I was like no, he is not. He's single. Oh, he is? I think he's a daughter though. He's got daughters but you know, I do not think he's in a loving and caring relationship now. No, yeah, yeah. I figured. I was like no, that's definitely divorced man anger because he's got so much to place anger, displaced anger, pardon me. Anyway, well good. You see, I called that after all. I like being right about things that don't really matter. Yeah. That's like my favorite hobby. The best stuff is like clown, clown music, like blow decks like clown coconut music and I wrote down clown music playing that must mean Connie's near the edge of a deck. I'm sure enough. It's like don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, she's like fishing guys fishing. I was like yeah, wacky, they're always like wacky Connie and then it cuts to Connie and she's like, Hey guys, I love fishing. Yeah. Oh no. Oh my God. You're really good at the music. But I'm that is part of Connie's humor. She's so dry and dead Pam, but it doesn't always translate. She's one of the funniest people but it just seems really like monotone. It translates to me when her first line of the year or one of her first lines was like if you want to get with Connie, you pull up, you pull up in a truck and say, Hey, need a beer. What's it? What was her thing? Whatever. Yeah. Was it truck, beer, Connie's clothes come off. There's a third thing. Want to kill a gator? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Something. I like it. It's actually, it made me uncomfortable when she was being a bitch at the table when stupid rocky left and well, she wasn't being a bitch, but like, you know, talking shit when someone else left the table and she's like, I cannot stand that girl. She never does her work and she's, she's a Looney Tunes bitch or whatever. She's hearing that come out of her mouth. I love that. Oh my God. You're so gone. You want it. I'm sorry. Yeah. Connie went in now. I was like, whoa. I didn't realize that she did her so much. At a left field. She just exploded. Like she'd been holding it in. Yeah. Because at that point, Rocky's up at the ball. She had this like deliciously guilty child, like look on her face that she was talking shit to. She's like, that's right. I'm saying it. Yeah. That girl is crazy in that she would like smile and look around. It was really funny, but she was talking to the new guy who's like the nicest person ever. Like, yeah, you've got to know if you're going to be talking shit after someone leaves the dinner table, you have to sit next to somebody like me. You can't just be sitting across from a nice person and telling them because they have no preference. What is Eddie? I'm trying to remember what Eddie said that made Rocky get up from the table and go to the bar. And this was pretty brutal. He said, oh, because they were saying what family members we'd all be and Eddie just interjects like no problem. You'd be a meals crazy girlfriend. Yeah. Yeah, I, again, like I really, you know, Rocky seems totally irresponsible and annoying and a pain in the ass, but I did feel bad for her because, you know, on her end, she's like, oh, I thought we had something and then all of a sudden he's just becoming a dick. And now he's actually, you know, calling it out, like not calling it out, but like, you know, he's venting whatever it is that he's going through in front of people and making her feel like shit. I felt bad for her. You know, actually support that blow job. You go out and that she wanted to order it from the bar. I did. And if you can make me feel bad for Rocky, I mean, you really must have done something bad. Yeah. Didn't Leon tweet out Rocky's phone number? Yeah. Apparently I did catch one of that. Yeah. Cause he was, what was he doing? Just posting an email that she had sent him or something? He was trying to like submit something to beefcheeks.com and accidentally tweeted out her phone. Whoops. It's supposed to be an invitation. It's got like rosenconc.com and Rocky right next to each other on the phone, but yeah. So what am I rotting here? Oh, yeah. When she was at the bar, we want some blow job shots, blow job. You want some blow jobs and Amy's like, just stop it. Just stop. Your blow job breakdown is embarrassing. Just stop it. Well, it really was. It's like that desperate girl that's just going for the sexual humor and making everybody else really uncomfortable. Like, I'm all for like a phallic joke now and then, but I mean, at least be clever about it. Not so desperate. Yeah. Yeah. She's trying to be like as nasty as the guy who is mean to her. Look like being a nasty guy too guys. And she's like, no, Amy, it's like literally a shot, like a buttery nipple or a splooch on the face or like, you know, you know how it is dirty Sanchez, you know, like a pro necklace. Like, you know, we're those. Yeah. You know, it's all over. Amy's like, really? Not that our ball was dirty. It's like, you could order those. You could just order a blow job. What? How can I put myself into a bottle? So a family dinner, a buttery nipple, Eddie, Bing, me, and Rocky, all last shot of Rocky diving in. Okay. Yeah. So this was the end of the episode. And then they show next week, next week on Below Deck, she's losing it, she's losing it. And then there she goes. And she's diving into the water in her mermaid and then Ursula spits her back up. Yeah. She's like, listen, I've still got enough of the aerial in the box. I don't even know any young twats down here, my bitch. Rome out of you. Rocky. Be a part of that world. Not mine. But even like that scene is a little bit sad for Rocky because it's like she just cracked so far that now she's like going for her last trick in the bag, like she is just trying for something. And that trick didn't even work last time. Like it's not even, it's not working anymore. She's just, you know, she's like hot people. You got to keep mixing it up. You can't just have a mermaid tail facial hair all the time. Yeah. And if you're going to be crazy, you have to be crazy. You can't just have like one prop, you know, like even carrot top goes to the, I was going to say carrot top. He's actually from my same hometown. Girl, you better find you a new home town. Spencer gifts. No, no, uh, her to come up with me. Staff. You better get you over to expenses. You know what she needs to do? She needs to go find a job as a lifeguard. That way she can jump in the water every single day and she can shut up about it. I'm only feel free when I'm in the water or like just shut up. You do that be a dolphin trainer, but don't be a, you don't get on a yacht. You're not supposed to be in the water. You're supposed to be like, you know, because the first time someone tells her not to run at the pool, she'll start like sobbing and like calling her mom and stuff about her. And that's also keep in mind, like wife guards have to save lives. That's kind of like, maybe she should be like a aquatic performer, like at a place that you go to in like central Florida. Yeah, where you get the mermaids, right? Yeah, there is a mermaid show. Yeah. That's what you should do. Yeah. Yeah, she should do a mermaid show where you don't have to have like proper form. You know, like dance, dance form, because you know that her wrists are always like slightly bent wrong so that she can stand out from the ensemble. That's why they've kicked her out of fiddler on the roof 30 times across America. In my mind. Is it that she's like, can I wear my mermaids, can I wear my mermaid tail during tradition, anyone? Rocky, this is cats. So I'm sorry if I just want something to be new and fresh. And I just don't want the same old, same old Andrew Lloyd Webber. How about instead of the chandelier coming down? How about if I just jump into a pool of water in the middle of the musical? How about that? It's gonna be great. I'm gonna do it. I'm just gonna do it. Well, my last note is be sure to tell Kate that you really appreciate her lack of food knowledge. Okay. So I've said this on the show before, but it's not your lack of food knowledge. I'm not being a dick. I'm saying you have really earned your thinness. And I really appreciate it on the show when they're like, let's get this kind of food and you're like, what's that? And I love it. And last night it was, you said, what's the difference between jams, jellies and preserves? And I was like, I love you for not knowing that and asking out of sheer curiosity in case someone else needed to know in the future. Because you know what the difference is? I mean, I don't know the difference between preserves and jam. Yeah, well, because you're not like food, see, I'm like a food act. So when I see someone legit, yeah, when I see someone legit thin, who's like really just not obsessing over food all day, that's my hero, like you're my goal. You're my goal in my mind. You're my goal. Thanks. Yeah. I mean, I don't have a lot of time to eat on boats and I like to be skinny and I appreciate you earning it. You know, at this point, like we're all learning that it actually takes work because so much of my growing up was these like, well, and still now like diet this diet that and we've learned all these new ways to eat naughty. And the truth is like, if you really want to do it, it's hard work. And so when I see people who are really working hard and doing it, I'm like, you go for it. Thank you. Thank you for being a gorgeous one. But here's a little secret. Once you stop eating a lot for a while, you're stomach kind of shrinks. Yeah. And then you forget what food tastes like. I want to get to the point where you forget what food tastes like because I remember way too well, and that's why I'm always going down to the vending machine to get kickettes. Well, and also the problem with that is your stomach shrinks, right? And you feel like you're a different person and you're never going to go back there. And then you eat a piece of pizza one night just to be like ironic. Like remember this? I used to obsess over this. And now it's a good idea to have that one. You have that one piece of pizza and then you're at like the $5 hot and ready line at little seasons every day for a month. Oh, I do love a good chalupa every now and then we'll talk about Mel. I admit it. I was like walking through New York once and my friend was like, gosh, I'm just so hungry. My stomach has that weird empty feeling. And I didn't mean this as a joke. I was like, yeah, that's what skinny feels like. It's true. When you ask people like, how do you do it? Because I do, you know, like I'll walk up to a hot person and just be like, so you're hot. How do you do it? And they're like, well, I don't eat very much. And then I exercise every day. And I'm, I keep asking because I'm looking for a better answer, but there isn't one, unfortunately. Yeah. That's my message. Oh, I love it. But also it's like, yeah, people are like, um, so I bet you can eat whatever you want. Come on. You're so thin. Just eat it. I'm like, you think this is a coincidence? Oh, yeah, exactly. They asked Kathy Griffin that one time because, you know, she's always obsessing over that stuff. And they said, Hey, how do you keep this rock and body all day? And she's like, Oh, it's easy. You just get used to living with hunger because you're hungry all day and it never goes away. And it's terrible. And I was like, Oh my God, I respect you so much. Yeah. That's true. The problem for me is that in my advanced age, I've started to become more and more of a hungry person. So if I don't eat, I'm realizing I really become a real asshole. And so it's constantly straddling that line of I want to, uh, lose weight. And yet I also want to keep friends. And I don't know what to do. I'll probably just, uh, obviously you just like keep skinny friends, but actually now you say that I should, I should use that to my defense when people are like, Oh, you're such a bitch. Be like, because I'm skinny. I had to choose one. You know, yeah. Exactly. I'm hungry. Yeah. I'm hungry. My models are bitchy. They're fucking hungry. That's why so many X models, whenever they show an X model on, you know, whatever, like project runway, when they're coming back to judge or something, and they look so glowing and happy is because they have to retire when they're 30 or whatever. So most of them retire and start like a nail polish business or whatever and eat. They find a husband and they eat. Yeah. Exactly. So true. That's the happy ending for a model. And isn't it lovely? Well, Kate, you're amazing. Yes. If you come to L.A., you have to look us up so we can all go out and get a drink and not. Yeah. And we'll bring Nadine. Yes. Oh my God. I love her. She lives too far for me. Yeah. Um, and Kate, you talked to us for over two hours. I know. This is crazy. I know. Marathon. It's all good. Yeah. It's all going up. We go back and edit. Yeah. We just, we just, we were like, Oh my God, it's been too hard. We just throw it up there. Yeah. Just make me seem really funny and smart. You are. You are really smart. Oh, thanks guys. All the places. Thanks guys. I was fishing. Yeah. All right. You're regular Connie. You've been awesome. Thank you so, so much. Yeah. A lot of shit goes down at the reunion. Feel free to come back and tell us about it. Yeah. You know it will. Yeah. So watch, watch some housewives in your off time because we're always looking for someone to talk to. Yeah. All right. I'm going to do that. I have a homework assignment and I'm excited. You're the best. All right. All right. Thank you so much for coming on. Of course. Thank you so much. All right. Talk soon. Bye. Bye. Bye. 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