Unlock your imagination with Audible. When you listen to audio content, your mind is free to paint the scenes and feel the emotions of a great story. Audible's extensive catalog is sure to have titles that you'll enjoy, immerse yourself in captivating tales, learn from world-renowned experts, and discover new perspectives all while multitasking or relaxing. There's more to imagine when you listen, and one title that I've been listening to is my friend Neil J. Young's coming out Republican, which talks about the history of gay Republicans. It's super fascinating and super interesting. As an Audible member, you choose one title a month to keep from their entire catalog. New members can try Audible free for 30 days. Visit audible.com/crapins or text Crapins to 500-500. That's audible.com/crapins or text Crapins to 500-500. Listen, weight loss drugs and GLP ones are all anybody's talking about right now. They're everywhere, but it's confusing to figure out how to get them, but it doesn't have to be. Through hymns and hers, you can get access to a budget-friendly weight loss program personalized just for you. Hymns and hers connects you with a medical provider who will work with you to determine your best treatment option, and if prescribed, you get the medication as part of a doctor-developed weight loss program complete with ongoing support, check-ins, medication adjustments, and answers to questions 100% online at no additional cost. Through hymns and hers, weight loss plans are more affordable, starting at $199 per month with a 12-month subscription paid up front. No hidden fees, no access fees, and no membership fees. Start your free online visit today at forhers.com/crapins. That's F-O-R-H-E-R-S.com/crapins for your personalized weight loss treatment options. For hers.com/crapins, hers weight loss is not available everywhere. Companded products are not FDA-approved or verified for safety, effectiveness, or quality. Prescription required restrictions apply. This episode of Watch For Crapins is brought to you by Casper Matrices. Go to casper.com/crapins to get $50 off your mattress from Casper. Watch For Crapins. Watch For Crapins. Who cares what happens when there's so much that crapins? Crapins. Crapins. Crapins. Crapins. Crapins. Crapins. Watch For Crapins. Watch For Crapins. Who cares what happens when there's so much that crapins. Hey everyone. Welcome to Watch For Crapins. A podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to watch. I'm Ben Mandelker from bsideblog.com and the Bantar Blender podcast. And joining me as always is the funny, the hilarious, the charming, and the musically gifted Ronnie Caram. Oh, thanks, Ben. Thanks. Ronnie Caram, I should note, is from trashtalktv.com and the world. Tried to give you a second credit there and I couldn't think of one. I don't have second credits, Ben. I'm sure I'm down the credits, all right? Ronnie is a very special person. And if you want to learn more about Ronnie and people and things like that about this podcast, come to Watch For Crapins.com and follow us on social media. You can find all our Instagram and Vine and Twitter, things there. But perhaps most importantly, you can come to Facebook.com/Watch For Crapins. And you can join the legions of listeners who seem to be joining every single day. This Facebook page is great. It's more than just a Facebook page. It's actually a community at this point. People post the funniest shit on our page. I am not even lying. They do. Look, Ronnie's already laughing. He's laughing. We've got so much good stuff today on the page. Yeah, it's really true. So do that. Do join our page because it really is good. Half the news that we get from this podcast is from there. And of course, you can support us on Patreon, patreon.com/Watch For Crapins. Our supporters get access to a bonus episode every week. This week, we just talked about Mad Max and the Duggers. So that's fun. And once a month, there's a Google Hangout, The Ringtones. It's so great. And, you know, of course, you can subscribe to us on iTunes and SoundCloud. If you missed the last episode, we had Heather McDonald on, who is a famous person. So that should be... Yeah, sorry about our sound. Skype has this thing when we record that if it drops a call, I guess it's messing with my mic or something because my mic was really low. Damn it. We'll figure this out one day. Yeah. But isn't that our charm that we sound like we record in a barn? I'm sure people love that. Yes. When they find to like have a run or something. Yeah. It's me whispering. And then everybody else like, or vice versa. The point is, we understand that there's a problem, but we're a little helpless to fix it at the moment. But we appreciate your patience and we will make it up to you somehow, some way. And the first way that we're going to make it up to you is by reading an ad. But before we do that, we're going to say today we're going to talk about the Real Housewives and Mailman Reunion, pot one, the latest episode of Shah's sunset. That's so Persian. And we are for sure going to talk about the latest Kim Richards gossip, which is just fresh off the presses. But before that, guys, we got to talk about mattresses. And you know what? Mattresses. I'm actually excited to talk about this because I need a new mattress. I've had the same mattress since 2002 and I've hated it every single day. But I'm like, I've just never, like mattresses are expensive. Mattresses are one of those things you should spend money on like condoms. Like don't get the cheap condom. Yeah. I bought my mattress for $400 less than learned. So I am actually dipping my toes into the mattress market these days. So it's convenient that we have this little ad from Casper. Casper mattresses. It's not from J Lo's boyfriend. So Casper is an online retailer of premium mattresses for a fraction of the price. I'm reading it like Reza. The mattress industry has inherently forced customers into paying notoriously high markups. This is true. Casper is revolutionizing the mattress industry by cutting the cost of dealing with the resellers and showrooms and passing that savings directly to the consumer. A Casper mattress provides resilience and long lasted supportive comfort. Casper's mattress is only one of a kind. A new hybrid mattress that combines premium latex foam with memory foam. That's two foams. Two foams for the price of one. Double foam. Mattresses can cost well over $1,500. Also true. But Casper mattresses cost between $500 for a twin size mattress or $600 for a twin XL, $750 for a full size, $850 for queen size and $950 for king size mattress. Casper understands that buying a mattress online can have consumers wondering how this is possible. Buying you Casper mattress is completely risk free. Casper offers free delivery and returns within a 100 day period. It's that simple. Statistically lying on a bed for four minutes in a showroom has no correlation to whether it's the right bed for you. I can ask you how to test that. I can ask for that with my mattress right here. My dear mattress of 14 years that I hate the bad marriage. That's why Casper has turned the buying process into a risk free experience. Casper understands the importance of truly trying out a mattress that in all reality you just spend a third of your life on. Here's some really important points for you guys. Obsessively engineered mattress at a shockingly fair price is what Casper addresses. I messed up our talking points. Two technologies latex foam and memory foam come together for better nights and brighter days. This one's actually important for those of you who are like, "I'm not going to buy a mattress off the Internet." Well, guess what? There's a risk free trial and return policy. You can try sleeping on a Casper for 100 days. I think JLo did with free delivery and painless returns. It's made in America 500 for a twin size and 950 for a king size. Comparing that to industry averages, that's an outstanding price point. If you want to buy a Casper mattress, if you want to get $50 off and already a pretty cheap mattress, by the way, $850 for a queen size mattress is actually pretty good. If you want to get $50 off your Casper mattress, all you have to do is go to casper.com/crapins. That's right. Come to casper.com/crapins. We've made this the longest commercial. I know. For those of you who've fallen asleep on your non-casper mattress, wake up. The podcast is getting back. We're half an hour into this. I'm ready to be a show. Sorry to everyone. I'm so sorry. Thanks to them for advocating with us. All right. What are we talking about today? We were a little light on show this week because Memorial Day is whatever. Blood, sweat, and heels took off from Memorial Day. Not on Memorial Day. We all remember the Memorial Day people showed shit. I don't know what that's saying to the military. We all remember what happened when the blood, sweat, and heels gals went away from Memorial Day last year. Nothing good. Micah, Micah in the Hamptons. Anyway, we got to start with the gossip. Let's start with Kim, Mother Fucking Richards. She's searching for Casper. Casper, the friendly mattress. She's like, "Oh, there's another stuff over there." It's shaped like a rectangle. Kim Richards. This mattress never disappeared. It's a very friendly mattress. He always comes to the means of Apollo lounge. It's like our spot. I've been taking my Casper, Master Master Master, to the Apollo lounge since I was five with my mom. Oh, Kim. So poor. So poor as Kim Richards, you know, and I know that as even talking about Kim Richards could put her into a terrible alcohol-fueled rage because this is all everybody else's fault. Casper is off limits. Kingsley and Casper are off limits. This weekend. So after Dr. Phil, Kim was like, "Yeah, thanks. It's so nice to me. She thinks for everything you did." As if she didn't just run off-set screaming, "Fuck you, you fat guy. Most bastards are 10 years ago." She was pretending like none of that ever happened, and she didn't go to rehab. She picked her own facility, which rumor has it. I miss you, Adele. Come back. Yeah. Rumor has it is not at all a rehab facility, but a sober living facility. This is her most recent stint or first stint. This is the one after Dr. Phil. Oh, really? She's like, "I have to be close to my house. I have to have parking. I want a McDonald's on the inside and a Taco Bell on my outside, and then a piece of head across the street." Nothing but Casper mattresses. So she wouldn't go to rehab, but rumor has it. She went to some kind of sober living facility or whatever. She got out because one of her big worries was being able to go to her daughter's second wedding when we saw on the show last year. The second wedding is now, for whatever reason. These kids are just getting a million weddings. These women are richer than you are. Their kids get five weddings each. She got out to go to the wedding, and there have been pictures all weekend of her like, "Yeah, hi, man. I'm getting married. I'm not going to run from Richard Guell. I can do the last time. I guess." Welcome to Cabo. What's your dream? She was there, and TMZ is reporting today that Kim Richards melted down at her daughter's wedding over the weekend to the point where her sober coach quit. Her daughter isn't speaking with her anymore, and those present say she was either on drugs or alcohol. Yeah, you know, this is all bad news. First of all, a sober coach who quits, you know, that's really bad because that's the one thing a sober coach is not really supposed to do. But it's sort of like when Teresa Judice's PR woman quit, it was like, "There's just nothing I can do. Let this woman just kill herself." Well, the sober coach invoked the lemon law. Yeah. No fixing this bitch. Take her back. I don't care what I signed. Yeah. Well, how about she doesn't have a sober coach? How about she has a police escort next time? Well, they're, you know, she's being charged with all that stuff too, so she might. She's have like a Reese Witherspoon hot pursuit bodyguard or like police friend who keeps her like on a handcuff with her, and then they get into hijinks together in Mexico. Multiple sources told TMZ Kim was clearly under the influence of something, although no one seems to know what. Whatever she drank, she did so in private, but she was a mess. We're told she was saying horribly nasty things to her daughter Brooke right after the wedding. What a shock. It was also cursing out the groom's family and was generally belligerent. The bride has vowed she won't speak with her mom again. As for the sober coach, we're told she couldn't control Kim and left Mexico immediately after the wedding. Man, if you're going to feel anywhere, if you're going to feel uncomfortable anywhere as a sober coach is Mexico. Yeah, I know. It's got to be a horrible place for a sober coach. Yeah, that's not where it's, that's not where sobriety goes to flourish. Yeah, so no one knows what's happening to Kim. She's silent, but I have a feeling she's in a booth somewhere talking to people who didn't invite her. I'm just imagining her at some part of the resort that's been like freshly painted and her just like her face up against the walls to be the paint off the walls. He has to get better cancer medication in Mexico. I had some more shot. You know, God bless you, Kim. Get it together, lady. You're not, I don't care. But she is a person out the groom's family, especially when he's rich. Well, then his family own Casper mattresses. Yeah, I know probably is very wealthy. Well, the daughter's not speaking to Kim anymore. So she's really, you know, she's basically her and Kingsley. And who knows where Kingsley is stuffed kin stuffed Kingsley. By the way, off topic, I'm on the TMZ page and there's this stupid picture of Ed Sheeran and Taylor Swift. And it occurred to me, Ed Sheeran looks exactly like Caroline Manzo. And that is not. He's the one who sings all those awful songs. And you know what, that's not a good look if you're a pop star. He's a woman. Yeah, he sings, he sings one song that I really like called the 18. And then everything else he sings, I think it's just like the worst thing in the world. Oh, he's so little. And Caroline man, he looks exactly like Caroline Manzo. He does look like Caroline Manzo. He looks like a cross between Caroline Manzo and Craig, I mean, Craig Aiken, Clay Aiken. Not a good cross to be by that. That's like not lesson. Yeah. Learn the guitar. Yeah, or something. Listen, I'm sorry. I'm just, I'm just thinking out loud. Are you staring at, are you staring at Ed Sheeran pictures now? No, I'm just looking at the one picture of him with Taylor Swift. And she's got like little squinty eyes and he's frumpy with his ginger hair. I'm just thinking, I'm just seeing Caroline Manzo dating Taylor Swift because that would be a good breakup song. Like breaking up with Caroline Manzo. I know. You have too many opinions about my life to many opinions about my life. Well, it's funny because the picture right above the montams is a picture of Gigi Hadad. So it all comes back to real housewives anyway, because also Gigi Hadad was in Taylor Swift's video. So I know exactly. Kim Richards wasn't. Kim Richards thought she was. She's just like walking on the beach at Cabo, thinking she's in the music video. And now we're getting back together. She's in a Taylor Swift video from a long time ago. Shake it off. Shake it off. My niece sent me a video. I said send me a video. And so she made me a Taylor Swift video of herself. And now they have apps on the iPhone where it just cuts together a video for you and puts effects. And she has like five different costume changes. And she's like doing handstands. What the hell? It's amazing. That's what Kim was doing. I have used that. I have used I have that app. And I use it to great effect two years ago to make a similar sort of video to blurred lines with no, no rape involved. Yeah. Oh, so let's get on to our Bravo talk or right before we're like, we're lied on shows today. This show is going to be five minutes and it's been a mattress commercial and Kim is eating pain, which is by the way, they're very similar. You know, a doctor feels the one he suggested a paint can. I'm sorry. I've been sniffing memory foam. So don't give two foams to Kim Richards, like the Gremlins. Don't put Kim Richards on two types of foam after midnight. Otherwise, the demon comes up. I can't find my kids. This memory foam is broken. I want to have a special line at Casper for Kim Richards calls memory foam is broken. She's like, I'm trying to put on my she's like tearing up the matches and putting on her face. It's supposed to make me like younger and smarter memory foam. So anyway, should we talk about what we talk about? Let's talk about whatever you want. Let's talk about Shah's since it was yesterday. Oh, yeah. And we gave Shah's a little shorty last week. Okay, we can let's go into Shah's Shah's penultimate. You're in trouble today because I taught notes for Shah's. That means they're like five times the length that they normally are. I'm going to talk about every little thing. Good. How Gigi's arm wrinkles at her elbow. It's like every little thing. It's like that police song. Every little thing she does is magic. It's like the reverse of that. Every little thing she does is not awe inspiring. So we open at what was that that? The Campo de Cahuenga restaurant? No, it was like, no, it was it. We opened, you're talking about where Mike and Gigi were. They were at a restaurant called like Chai or Chai or whatever. X AI. It's on sunset. It's right. It's actually like equidistant between us. It's on sunset across the Chipotle. They go there a lot because they, I guess, you know, if there's a hook around hookah and like free hummus, those people are there. Which sounds so racist for me to say those people. I'm sorry. I just meant like literally like Gigi and Mike. They'll gravitate to any hookah and hummus. So they go there and Mike is like, he's like, you know what? He's like, I have so much love for Gigi. I have to, you know, things have gotten so off track with called Nessa. I have to find a way because I have so much love for her. I have to see where things went wrong. So it's not right. And so then they showed clips of like their beautiful friendship. And he's like, you're a horrible person. You're going to be NAFTA. No available friends to ask whole two. Yeah. All right. You've got to change. And then she's like crying. And then like getting drunk and throwing stuff. I was like, this is a really nice, this is a really nice memory. Great. Great friendship. Two assholes. What a terrible friendship to end. So she's like, well, Mike, you, you tried to fuck me. Did you not try to have sex with me? And he's like, he's like, go Nessa. Like we were drinking so much. We were drinking so much. And we were taking pills. I can't remember. I do not remember. And I love how he goes from like not remembering to kind of remembering to like, well, who cares if I did? Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Because he's like, you know what? I apologize if I tried to have sex with you. And she's like, that's not an apology. I'm like, you know, this whole thing is so ridiculous. It's like, this is terrible. I might have lost a friend forever. And when I was in the restroom, some lady came in and pulled down her pants. And that is completely rape. It's almost rape. I've called the police. And the lady's still in there probably being a big old Nessa. If I try. She was saying, what did she say? When he's saying, he's just asking, listen, why, why have you been so hateful when we were friends? And we've seen each other. He didn't say this, but he's like, we've been hanging out for a year. And you've never said anything until we were at some party in public. The thing is, Mike can't form a thought. He says things like, why you got to be a hater? Why can't we talk in private? None of that's really the issue. How about, why did you wait a year and pretend you were my friend or my friend and then bring this up publicly in a party and try to learn my role? And he, and he does have a point, obviously, because if they are such good friends, well, Nessa should know that he's a horn dog. They all acknowledge that he's like a man whore. So if he's really wasted and they have acknowledged that they were all wasted and he's doing this, it doesn't make it right. But she should, as friends, give him the benefit of the doubt and say, put him down and be like, you know what? Last night, Mike, we are like really tight and you tried to make a move on me and it made me feel super uncomfortable. Like, I think I need an apology. And he could, at that time, you would say, oh my God, I'm so sorry. I don't remember, but she instead turned it, brought it up to a level of rape and then sat on it for a year and then made a whole big thing about it and put the friends in the middle. And now, even though she's actually in the right, she is acting in such a way that Mike sort of seems like he's in the right now. She's not in the right. I don't see one way that she's in the right. Well, she's in the right, she's in the right in the initial circumstance, where if he tried to hit on her and made her feel weird, then she has a right to feel weird about that. But she has now done, she's handled it so poorly, she has fallen out of the right because she's now equated it essentially to rape, even though she says she hasn't, but she has. So it's like, listen, I'm sorry, I guess, whatever, let's be friends. And she's like, no, what I need you to say is that I accept that I tried to have sex with you, but I don't remember. And so he's like, okay, I accept that I tried to have sex with you, but I don't remember. And she's like, no, that's not good enough. Like he's reading the exact script. You just wrote and gone. That's a come on, lady. I know. I mean, it's like every year, she's just in the middle of some absolutely ridiculous, stupid controversy every single year. In my heart, I know that you know. I'm so easy. I like when Gigi comes up with lines before she comes. I know. I just I just wish that we had had a sequence where Gigi talked to herself like that one season when she went to anger management. And they had the scene where left left side of the screen, Gigi talked her right side of the screen, Gigi. Do you remember that? When angry Gigi talked to like rational Gigi. Yeah, Gigi's crazy, but Mike's also an idiot and he's marrying a bitch on wheels. So good luck with the rest of your life. Like that guy's not that guy's not going to be winning. Yeah, any point. Mike's and Mike's entire storyline this season has been saying over and over again, it breaks my heart. He used to be a brother. It breaks my heart. That's it. And also covering his Lexus seats in Bentley covers, which I didn't notice until someone posted that on Facebook, but this guy is just never going to tell the truth. Okay, no one believes that that's Alexis or that even if it is a Bentley that actually owns it. It's probably like the same Bentley that gets passed around between him and Slade smiley. Although we know I'm sorry, Gretchen got slayed at Rolls Royce, a fake Rolls Royce. That's right. It's the Bravo Bentley. Also, he wasn't he driving a Bentley to his engagement. Yes. Jumping out of the plane. No, it was a no, that was a shit right out of the Bentley. No, no, that was that was a Rolls Royce that he drove because remember I got mad because I'm like, you know, when you have a Rolls Royce, you're supposed to be a passenger in it, not the driver. But everyone drives them. So stupid. I'm like, yeah, he's driving his Bentscus. Yeah. So anyway, that was the last of Mike for the episode. And then it was a time to go to Thailand. That's my honeymoon without my honey. That's so Persian. What's a bitch got a dude to get to Southeast Asia without his honey? First of all, can I feel any less sorry for Reza? Really? He's asking for pity. You plan a wedding. Then you dump the guy. Then you go without. Then you tell all your friends, they can't even call him to comfort him. Then you go on a friend trip on your wedding trip and leave him at home. Yes. What the hell? And you bring two assholes named Bobby and Asafa in his place. I mean, they probably got to go first place, but like you would rather spend that time with Bobby and Asafa rather than having Adam there and it be kind of awkward, but you guys could stay in separate rooms or honestly, you guys, you just both be there and just be working your shit out. Like when you would break up with him, he just broke off the wedding. They're still together. Yeah, it's bullshit. He left he left Mike literally in their apartment. He's like, Hey, I hope we work things out. I hope I'm gone. You learned to not be attracted to free ballpoint because I'm not wearing I'm not going commando. All right. Jesus. It's hard with not this big. So on the plane. So first of all, Bobby and Asafa, they've been awful all season, but they have just been reaching new levels of awfulness. They get on the plane and they're fighting in first class. I feel bad for those all the passengers on there who actually paid money to fly first class. He didn't wasn't on Bravo's dime. People who paid like $10,000 for the luxury of having peace and quiet first classes. They fly from LA to Thailand. And these assholes, they're like, babe, put your tray up. Be a man, put your tray up. Babe, you're so ridiculous. If we were going to crash and the everything came down, you probably wouldn't even put it on yourself first. You would be selfish and put it on me first, babe. Babe, be a man. Babe, no, what I want from you. What I need from you. I know we can get married. Babe, you held my peanuts for me. That's so uncool, babe. What kind of man does that? You should have woken me up to give me my peanuts. Babe, I can't believe you turned your phone off on the plane. Like be a man, rebel against the rules. Put your Wi-Fi on on your plane, babe, on your phone. Babe, babe, why can't even speak right? Babe, stop calling my ears. Yeah. My ears are popping, babe. You fucked, you fucked my neighbor. What's her thing? And then she said you fucked the trainer. So which is it? Is it your friend or is it the trainer? I think it's both. I think it's a trainer. I think that's what it is. I mean everything. She brings that up so often. It's like, like I'm surprised there wasn't a scene to fly to Thailand being like, okay, would you like something to drink? I don't know. Why don't you ask Bobby? He sure likes to drink out of my friend's pussy. He sure likes my friend's trainer vagina. Yeah, I'm not really sure about that. Like if he fucked the trainer and because that's not your friend, I mean, they act friendly and stuff because they're salespeople. But that's not your friend that's someone you hired or is it your friend? It's like you fucked the Starbucks guy and I know him because he wears a name tag. But that's not my friend. Like I can't accuse you of fucking my friend because I know him. You know what I mean? I need more specifics on this. I need them to talk about it more because I really haven't had enough of it. Yeah, exactly. So they they fight the whole way and they're awful. I mean, I I would have been a big fan of just like opening up the emergency exit and just kicking them off or just telling everyone like quietly like tell everyone on the plane, hey, everyone put on your seat belts. And then when Bobby and Asifah are like in the in the bathroom doing like the the mile high club, quietly when they get out of there, just open up the emergency exit. They just get sucked out and then they close the door and then everyone can take off their seat belts again. Yeah, just close it. Hey, you guys, Mike is going to propose to you in the back of the plane. We're going to need you to meet us back there and just push them out. They're falling down. I'm like, I'm gonna be a wife. So even before we get to this plane shit, because I told you to have notes on every single thing. Sorry, sorry for jumping ahead. You know, I'll let you I'll let you steer it. How about that? Yeah, but feel free to take the wheel because you know how it can get. I'll be like, and then they went to this place with a trash can to add one of those lids that you have to push with your hand. Who wants to throw something away if you have to have trusted. Babe, the trash lid that's touched other trash. Babe, does this trash can remind you of my friend who you slept with? Because she's trash and so are you. Babe, be a man. Everybody's putting their hands through you. Be a man. So MJ is talking about how she can't bring her boyfriend and she wanted to have sex on a tie beach. So Thailand should be sending you a thank you card at any moment. They're like, we take a lot of sick shit in this country. Thailand's like, we don't need to see. Thailand's like, we're ready for the next tsunami. And then it's her talking to Siri, who she calls Siri. Yeah. And I love just imagining Siri Cruz sitting there on the other line. Yeah. Like waiting to find MJ directions for shit. MJ is like, Siri, should I pack my extra tight lace bodysuit or should I pack my extremely extra tight lace bodysuit? Siri, do they have tennis in? Do they have tennis in Thailand? No, good. I'll still wear a tennis outfit to a fine dining dinner with hugs. Oh, God. Oh, and then we got to our first, she called she said, should they call off the wedding and Siri said, Siri said, um, five signs you should call off a wedding and why my mother got 47 million dollars on the divorce. Um, but I just wanted to talk about the Bobby stuff because we knew this trip was going to be bad even when they were packing because they were doing that fake fighting thing they do when they're packing where she's like, babe, what are you going to pack? And he's like, babe, what should I pack? And she's like, I'm taking hair straightener. And then he's like, dammit, I wanted to know about clothes. And then he throws his shorts down. Yeah. Whoa, you, you sure threw those workout shorts? Yeah, he's like, big, like, you know, man, through all I've been through, I really think I deserve a ring. Like, like she's, yeah, I don't think that's, yeah, I don't think that's how rings work. I don't think that's how, I don't think weddings are rewards for putting in like time and punishment. Okay. I think like weddings are the, the consummation of love, suppose not consummation, but the culmination of love. Okay. I don't think it's like, babe, I wash your dog. Now I get to get married. Yeah. I deserve our ring now. She's like waiting for that email from Starbucks. It says you get the free one. Congratulations gold member. Yeah. I just earned a free drink. I slept with Bobby 12 times. I am waiting for my free download and my free wedding. Mm hmm. They're horrible. And then yeah, fighting on plane. And then Reza gets there and he's like, Oh, Jesus in one cab and everybody else in the others. So they didn't have to listen to them anymore. But I found that to be very Yolanda Foster. It was, but I got it. I, I understood because they just, I mean, Bobby and Hasafa are so terrible. I felt bad for Shervin because you know, Shervin is the best of all of them. He's like the nicest guy. He's the best looking. He's the friendliest and he gets stuck with Bobby and Hasafa. Yeah. And oh, you're always trying to, we're always trying to figure out who Bobby looks like with his bad man plastic surgery. It is a minute. I thought he had possum face because he does kind of have possum face. I saw one, one time when I was stoned and I thought it was an alien. I had never seen a face of a possum before, but he has possum face. Yeah. But this week, I think it was more like Joe Pesci. It's like a possum playing Joe Pesci. I feel like he looks like a Mexican skeleton. You know, like, you know, like the, the skulls for like day of the day of the dead. Yeah, that's what I think about his face looks like. If you, if you really look at it, like once the one chattery skull down the candle, you know, like covering the skull like that. Yeah. You know, he looks like, he looks like a bad horror movie. If someone's about to like get like shot in the head and their heads can explode, they have like a weird like plaster of Paris version of the head that's going to get destroyed. That's what he looks like. You know, with bulging on, it's like the fake, the fake head that's about to explode. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And in 1984 horror movie, like he's about to get like an axe in his head. That's what he looks like. Because his, because his beard is obviously painted on. It's like dragging beard. His hair is fake too. It's been, it's been plugged in and his skin is like plasticky and weird, but like tight and everything in his eyes bulge. So he is definitely like special effects, special effects face. Not only is he hot, he constantly starts fights with his girlfriend and says things at the end of every fight like, then move out. We're done. It's like Jesus. How many times are you going to break up in one episode for Christ Jesus? Yeah. So they make it over to Thailand. And I think it's hilarious that you're in Thailand. Okay. And the hotel you choose looks exactly like the party buses, like those terrible party buses that they rent. Well, the, the resort, I mean, it looked, it looked amazing, but I know what you're saying. And it, what I kept on thinking was when they woke up for breakfast, they're like, it's time for breakfast. Oh, and they're just all eating American breakfast. And I'm like, I'm like, have some, have some Thai breakfast. Get into it. Get into the culture. All they do is eat. I do like how on this show that they actually eat things. They get to the room and there's a huge spread. And we see them eating. And the next scene is breakfast where they're eating. Yeah. And then they meet at dinner where they're eating. Yeah. Wow. So then, well, you, you lead it, but I was going to make a comment about the tricep. But you, you get us to the tricep. Okay. Yeah. The only thing I had about this was it. It's obviously a free thing because they were reading it like we read Casper commercials. Yeah. He's like, I wanted to come to the most luxurious hotel in Thailand. One that did not make me feel uncomfortable. One that did not feel like a springy mattress that felt good in a store, but then terrible once it was delivered. She's a surprise making effort, man. I know. He's, he's like, I chose, I chose this resort because they have a great promotional code. It's one, it's like PullmanResort.com/shaz. And you know, that's a Bravo hotel because their decorations are gigantic faces that are too big for anybody's house. Yeah. Pretty much any place. Any place that any Bravo show goes to looks like a version of the Borgata in Atlantic City. Wait a second. Why is the menu at this hotel all like Ahi, Ahi's salad and like chicken. I'm trying to think of 80s dishes from Vanderpumpa rules. Darling, Chef Petty, Chef Petty just got back from a residency in, in Thailand. I'm sorry. I'm doing an Australian accident. I'm all turned around like dawling. All right. She finally wants you to get back to the kitchen. All right. And I want you to make noodles, make noodles, but then put egg shrimp and peanut sauce on them. All right. And we'll just call it like Thai something like, all right, Chef Petty, great. Big idea. Okay. Here's the idea. Okay. You take some chicken. All right. You put them on some skewers, then you take some peanut butter, and you add a little bit of coconut into it and you call it chicken sapté. All right. It's revolutionary. It's from Thailand. So they have all this food and then bada, bada, bada, bada. They're fighting, fighting, talking and then Mike makes a comment or servants behind them. And he, I keep calling him Mike, because it's basically like Mike who hasn't, who hasn't mentally raped anybody yet. Yeah. But Sherman's like, Oh, Bobby, you're going to get beat by the end of this trip. Because of course, the nice one on this show makes domestic abuse jokes. Yeah. The nicest one. And Austin is at Austin is like, how about you? How about you stay out of other people's relationships? Yeah. How is he supposed to do that? Exactly. The whole plane knows about your fucking relationship. Yeah. By the way, if you bicker in public, if you bicker in front of your friends, you have lost the right to tell them to stay out of your business. I'm sorry. It does not, it's not a one way street. Okay. If you were bickering in public, people were allowed to tell you to shut up and make comments and weigh in. I'm sorry. You've made it a public thing. One of my friends this weekend was complaining about her boyfriend all weekend. I mean, what an ask because she was mad at him. What an asshole he is this and that. So by the end of the weekend, everybody's like, did he even text you? Yeah, you should break up with his ass. And she's like, I don't like how everybody's telling you have to break up with my friend. Oh, God. Stop talking about it. Yeah. Jesus. Jesus. So by the way, so one of these meals, and I think this actually kicked off one of the fights, Bobby mentioned that he liked having his tricep sucked, which is like the the image of like a like some girl's face latched on to the back of his arm, like a lamprey. Wow. That was just a disgusting image. And then also, as I was like, is that what the trainer did? Is that what the trainer did for you? I'm like, Jesus, this girl, like anything, anything she will bring it back. And you know, she has to just shut up. She has to really shut up about this. You went back to him. So you also lose the right to throw this in his face over and over again. Okay. Sir, would you like a refill on your water? Sure. Oh, really? Did the trainer do that? Did she refill your water? Well, after she fucked you, like, oh my God, it's not all about that. Leave the bus boy alone. I know. And then this is also around when Reza, this is one of the many times that Reza decided to have to shed some crocodile tears, like, you know, it's really hard for me. It's really hard for me to be here to know that, like, Adam was supposed to be here and he's not like, don't because I made him stay at home. Like, you don't give a, you don't care at all, Reza, we know when you care, you like, do your, you, Reza is a crier. And when he cares, like, I can't believe that I'm not here in tight limit. After I told him not to come and that he wasn't welcome, and that he can't call any of his friends. Yeah, I feel really bad for you, Reza. And he's saying, oh, my life is, he says during this. Listen, guys, my life has been really stressful and difficult. What are you talking about? Your life has not been stressful and difficult. You were an asshole to some nice guy who's dumb enough to be with you. You did this. Your boyfriend has done nothing wrong to you. Nothing. Yeah, I didn't see a lot of this regret happening during your bachelor party, Reza. When you were making out with God Adam doesn't even know about that. It's almost like, don't if I add him to Thailand so that when he finally finds out that I had some dick in my face, he won't even remember to be mad because he'll just be so grateful that I allowed him to fly somewhere. Yeah, I mean, Reza's actually doing a classic thing, which is that, you know, he acted pretty inappropriately on that bachelor party. I know it's a bachelor party, but he was making out with a good, good answer. And that's actually not cool. I mean, depends on their relationship, but I got the sense it was not an open relationship like that, even if, even though kissing is just barely, you know, breaking the rules, it still is kissing. And he knew he did something wrong. And he probably doesn't, he never liked Adam. Let's be honest. He never really liked Adam kissing a stripper is just as bad as, I mean, giving someone a blowjob. Where do you think that stripper's mouth has been all night? Exactly. So it's easier. It's easier for Reza to, rather than be like, whoa, I kind of crossed the line. I really fucked up. It's easier for him to just to push away Adam and make it seem like somehow this is Adam's intimacy issues. It's like, no, you never really like that into Adam. I mean, you may have liked Adam, but it was evident that he didn't like love Adam. He just was doing it to try to like prove to himself that he could be an adult. And rather than say that I fucked up, it was easier for him to, I think, to push Adam away. This is my armchair psychology base. Only on what Bravo gives us. Well, I'm about to do Instagram psychology. I'm too lazy to even do armchair psychology. So I went to Instagram to do some relation. I was like, is this guy, does he even really like Adam? Why is Adam in this relationship? Like, what has happened to Adam? And also, if you're ever in a relationship with somebody and this is for you, Ben, because you are, you should look at your Instagram and then you should look at their Instagram and see how even the pictures of your significant others are. Does that make sense? Like, if you look at Reza's Instagram, it's all pictures of Reza, all of them. Every single picture is like a selfie with Reza and somebody famous or, you know, some friend he's out with or some red carpet he's on or blue carpet in this case. Everyone, you have to go all the way down to the bottom to find one of Adam and Adam's leaning into it. He's like trying to make himself a part of it. He's like, wait, I want to be in this one, I'm never in a picture. And then there's a couple like four months ago that he, the Adam's actually in. But then you go to Adam's and it's like, of course, a ton of pictures with Reza, Reza, Reza, Reza, Reza, Reza, Reza, Adam and Reza, Adam being nice to all of Reza's friends, Adam holding MJ's dogs. So you know this relationship is doomed because their Instagrams are totally in equal. But if you have an Instagram that's all about basically your relationship and your boyfriend and then your boyfriend has you like, wait, the bottom of his, that just means that you probably love him more than you and you can do better. Also, there are plenty of men who don't like wearing underwear, Adam, go find one. Yeah, you know, Adam, you know, we, we should own Adam a lot, but he actually seems like a very nice, sweet, sensitive soul. And he needs to not be with like a crazy narcissist like Reza. Yeah, we don't shit on Adam. We like Adam, don't we? Adam, we're going to take it. We're going to take it a color me mine. And we're going to find and lovely, sweet, gentle gay for you there. And then you guys can just be happy together and go get llamas on your bachelor party and have a beautiful wedding wedding. Yeah, they need to have like a nice, nice app that's like grinder for gay people who just aren't into like being whores and fucking around all the time and obsessed with fucking fat hairy people. Yeah, it should be like sweeter. Yeah, it could be like that, you know, like one of those good reads or something, you know, where you it's like for gay people who want to meet each other, but they just want to talk about books. Yeah, exactly. They want to, yeah, talk about books. They want to go knitting tame gays, tame gays, which is basically what I've become. I've become a tame gay. Well, that's good. That's the goal. Yeah, I mean, otherwise, look, if you don't become a tame gay when you when you're in your 30s and stuff, you become just sad, gay, standing red leather bars with your friends complaining about stripper outfits like me. Yeah, I like here's how I've become a tame gay. On Sunday, my friend invited me out to Sunday, Sunday at the Abbey. And instead, I wound up like walking around the Silver Lake Reservoir and like, yeah, going to going to Angie Thomas's house. It's like, tame gay, tame gay, like last night, last night for Memorial Day, I wound up going to a randomly to a barbecue at Bonnie McKee's house. She's like a songwriter or whatever. Crazy Hollywood barbecue with like hot people strong and swimming around. It's like, okay, after 20 minutes, like, okay, get in, go home now. Tame gay. Tame gay. I'm going to go home and watch something on Bravo. Tame gay. I'm like, who's up for some sellers of catan? Tame gay. Who wants to suck my popsicle that I got from Trader Joe's that's made out of coconut and very low in artificial products. Tame gay. Into let's go home and sit around. Hat cancer can be solved with an all vegan diet. When I go when I go into the team gay app and I write into with a question mark, I'm really just talking about like baking. Are you into like carrot cake or chocolate cake? I'm into dick, Clark lists of the billboard, great songs of the year. I can't wait to get my hands around that big fat, cocker, spaniel, drawing, drawing. It's not even a real dog. I just want to hold the drawing. Oh, Tame gay. So, what else happened on this? Now I'm staring at a giant picture of Ben, my favorite Tame gay. Do you think do you think Tame gay is going to be the next this could be like the next dad bod? Like, you know how dad bod was started by some random kid wrote, like mentioned something like, I don't know if he's a woman or a guy, but like mentioned dad bod on like his little tumbler, like 13 followers. And now dad bod is a cultural phenomenon in one week. Yeah, Tame gay is kind of totally casual. I think it actually has caught on. I just think we don't see it as much because we live in a city like this where everybody tries to pretend they're like a young vibrant gay for a long time. Yeah, I think there are Tame gays here. They're I think I learned this from Bravo. They're dinner party gays, right? Like when when you can't meet anybody sensible and normal in a bar, it's because they're at a dinner party. Okay, it means you're too old to be at the bar. Yeah, that's true. I mean, but that's and that's basically what add but but the thing is this though, the crazy gays do have dinner parties too. But you know what though, if you ever here's how you know if you're a dinner party with crazy gays versus Tame gays, the crazy gay dinner, I shouldn't say crazy, but it's more like the party gays. Party gay dinner parties tend to not be very good. It's like here's something I heated up and they found it Ralph's like the Ralph's platter section. Yeah, if you get if you go to a dinner party with a bunch of gays and like all the food is like Ina Garten or Martha Stewart or just delicious, then you are with the Tame gays and you should be happy because that means you've made it. Yeah, but if you're if you're at a dinner party and the buffet is full of like think thin bars and those Starbucks those big Starbucks jugs that office people use. Yeah, if you are at a dinner party and someone has brought a rotisserie chicken from a supermarket, then you are not with the Tame gays. I love those things. Yeah, okay, so next scene they eat more food and then rest is like this is what we do and so Persian we eat and mean Adam we plan to eat and then eat and then eat you're supposed to wait until you're married to get that fat. Okay, calm down over there. It's bad enough. He's not fucking you already. You really think the answer is going to eat 10 courses a day. Calm down over there, Reza. Yeah, seriously. Reza. Reza. And then there was a time that they kind of split up to give advice to the friends. There was a guy. There was a debate about us if her nipples were peach or not. One of the worst debates that has ever reared its head on Bravo TV. Yeah, my my nipples are pink. Yeah, minor pain. He's like, no, they're not. My dad works in B2B marketing. He came by my school for career day and said he was a big row as man. Then he told everyone how much he loved calculating his return on ad spend. My friends still laughing me to this day. Not everyone gets B2B, but with LinkedIn, you'll be able to reach people who do get a hundred dollar credit on your next ad campaign. Go to linkedin.com/results to claim your credit that's linkedin.com/results. Terms and conditions apply. LinkedIn, the place to be to be. Etsy knows these aren't the sounds of holiday gifting. Oh, or, oh, okay. Thank you. Well, they're not the sounds you're hoping for. You want squeals of delight like this. Ooh, and spontaneously written songs of joy. I am so happy. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. To get those, make everyone on your list feel heard with gifts like personalized jewelry, custom artwork, vintage pieces, and home decor for original gifts that say I get you. Etsy has it, but they're brown. That's a person. It's a person to think your nipples are peach when they're not. Bad coloring is so Persian. Is it me? I thought it was kind of gross and a weird way to describe nipples as being peach. It's like that scene in face off the movie when Nicholas Cage says something like everybody loves to taste a peach and he kisses a woman. You're like, ew, that's a bad peach moment. I just think anytime awesome for opens or stupid fucking mouth, I can't pay attention. I heard peach nipple and I was like, okay, I'm looking on Facebook now. I'll be back whenever this bitch has been talking. She thinks she thinks it's like a moment of like hilarity. It's like, this is this will be a moment to show up my personality, make me a fan favorite. I'm going to talk about my nipples being peach. She's an awful human, but they both are. They're made for each other. I just wish they do it off camera. Yeah. So they split up. Reza is going to talk to Bobby and then also is going to talk to stupid ossifah. And by the way, I ladies like, oh, hi, you want that? You want that pedicure? This is for your mind and your body. And then ossifah is like, oh, yeah, we want to manicure. She doesn't speak that language. The language isn't bad Thai accent, you idiot. Like, do you talk to everybody with a different accent like that? Just try to match their accent to make yourself seem more down. Get out of here. Well, you know, what's funny is how even more offensive is the way they kept on walking up different and being like, Aloha, Aloha. I'm like, why are you saying Aloha in Thailand? Random foreign word. It's like it's like when teams are on the amazing race. And no matter what country they're in, they always tell the cab drivers, rapido, rapido, rapido. Love the hotel, can't wait to yell the Migas you gave us today. It's like, no, bitch. This is Thailand. Stop. Um, ba-da-ba-da-ba. Okay, so the difference in the therapy is very funny because oss is like, listen, listen, hun, what you really need to do is like, think about your spiritual compatibility and just stop fighting. And Reza's like, dump the bitch. She's mean to you. You should have left her in Thailand until she stopped looking at men without their underwear on the computer. Like, Reza's advice for relationships of his friends is always to dump them and get rid of them. Well, he's right in this case. Not like Bobby's in the right either. I think that Reza being in the right in this case would make Bobby right. And Bobby's the worst. No, but Bobby- Yeah, but the truth is every scene. He does, but ultimately, one of them has to dump each other and he's the only one who's going to do it because the difference is, well, they are both terrible people, but ultimately, she keeps raking Bobby over the coals for something that he did when they were not only were they broken up, but like, well, just that when he was, he didn't when they were broken up. I'm sorry. That's, that's what I meant to say. He did when they were broken up and she went back to him. So she, she keeps going back this place and she has to stop. She has to shut up or just, or leave. And so Reza is right. Bobby should just be like, get out of here. Like, I'm sick of this. Now, Bobby, of course, is terrible because he always- Sorry, go ahead. Well, I'm going to say because Bobby- I'll interrupt you when you're done. Yeah. Well, I'm like, I, the coffee is like in my brain now and I can't make coherent sentences. I'm sorry, everyone. Like, my, I'm just waiting for my, my quote of the week to have a million likes and ums in it. I'm sorry, everyone. I'm not articulate, not glabe. So, but Bobby's problem is that he always threatens to leave or we're over and then he always goes back, which also doesn't help things. It's like a parent who, who doesn't follow through the punishment to the child. I mean, they're both wrong, but the, it has, they need to not be together. I'm sorry, even though they deserve each other. I think Reza's wrong because Reza's saying like, if she treated me like that, I mean, dump the bitch. It's not about how she's treating him. They're both terrible. They're about, all they do is start fights with each other in public. They do it in front of his own mother. They do it everywhere they go. They're both insufferable assholes. And I don't even care what they do. I just want them to leave, leave me alone. I need people to them as people and as a couple, get up. Yeah, please go. But the most horrifying thing about this whole scene is listen, Thailand, do not be putting Reza in mesh underwear on TV. All right. Terrible, terrible. Please. And then they showed his butt crack through that whole scene. And I was like, God damn it. What is wrong with Adam? What is wrong with him? Why does Adam hate himself? Yes. Adam, you could do better way better. Adam, please. Anyone. Anyone. Anyone. And then Austin's like, well, how do you think your relationship's going off the phone? She's like, Oh, totally stable. It's great. I love him. We love each other. She's like, yeah, he annoys me. But you know what? I love him. I can't see myself with anyone else. And then I wrote again, Reza's ass of Bobby's face. I just, that's what I wrote down 10 times to say. Because like whole scene, it's like kept switching between Bobby's face and Reza's ass. And I couldn't decide which one gave me like the biggest opposite of a boner. Yeah, they're like two points on the same anti boner spectrum. It's like going, it's like going from red to blue. It's still all in the same rainbow. Like my boner is poking my spine. It's so far. Please. All right. My spine is going to choke. Yeah. No, I, the whole sequence was terrible. I mean, and I feel bad for us. Ah, I'm sorry. I keep, I keep ping ponging back and forth between who I like least because Asa is one of those awful girls who, who pokes and prods and and says little things and starts a fight. Not that Bobby doesn't, but she does. And then afterwards, like, but I can't see myself with anyone else. Like, yeah, I'm right. You can't see yourself with anyone else because no one else will take you. Like no one else will accept this behavior except other people like Bobby. The only, the only people that we've seen Asafta speak to you on this show other than cast members who don't have visible hatred for her on their face are the hairdressers that she pays to last everything for us. Yeah, the glam score. That's a bad sign, Asafta. Yeah, she's, she's an instigator and he's also, he's, I mean, they're both instigate each other. They're the same. They're the same. They're the exact same person. The thing is he brings up shit from the past all the time too. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And then he makes like a checklist, like, I'll marry you when you can learn to change to be with me, which is so if you do it. Yeah, he said, I'll change if you change. But I just have to change a little, you have to change a mountain of stuff. Yeah. And they're dumb because you should realize that you're not, you're not supposed to change someone in a relationship. Okay. Yeah, I can't even with these two anymore. Well, no, you have to you have to talk about them some more because then what happens next is they're all like hanging out. Reza and Reza and Bobby are like chilling. And so then the girls who'd been out at the pool and were wondering where Bobby was, they came in, they find Reza and Bobby. And of course, Asa's like, babe, babe, where were you? We were like him for you. Why were you? Why were you like, hang on here talking and we talk about me? And he's like, yeah, kind of a little bit. He's like, why? And then they start to fight and then they start to bigger. Oh, yeah. And then, and then Bobby decides he wants to like, he wants to put that all out on the table and she's like, can we do it in private? This is a sensitive subject. I want to talk in private. Oh, now you want to talk in private? Like, you do not get to pull that card. I'm sorry. You lost the privacy. And then he's like, no, I don't care. Like everybody else fucking wants to hear your bullshit. But right before he came back in, I just love that Asa got her in a happy loving mood to love him. And then Reza got the guy in a hateful mood. Yeah, there was no way this is going to work out tells you everything you need to know about this show. And Reza actually had the nerve to say this. He was, this is part of Bobby's advice when he's like, dumper, dumper. He says, what would your life be like with somebody who actually loved and adored you? Oh, really? Like Adam? What's your life? Like, you're you're you're at a fucking honeymoon trip that's no longer you're on a wedding trip that's no longer a wedding, because you were an asshole. It's like, you had one and you totally treated him like shit. Please stop giving good advice. Please, Jesus says, says the fucking guy on a vacation that's supposed to be first wedding. Well, then what's what's hilarious is as like, as Asa fun, Bobby goes storming out, because Bobby is like, it's over. So then then Asa's like, they're like, everyone who's left in the room is like, Oh, my God. Oh, my God. And Asa's like, this isn't right. Like, we should be focused on poor Reza. I'm like, Oh, yes, poor Reza, poor Reza, who is loving all this drama is not sad at all about Adam, except for a few token phrases he's thrown out to make people think he's sad. I was like, Asa, just be quiet. And also, Reza, who was just sitting with this guy all day long saying, dump the bitch, dump the bitch over and over again. All poor Reza. Or poor Reza doesn't want to hear this anymore. Meanwhile, Shervin goes and finds Asa and Shervin's like, Well, do you do you like it? You like you like Bobby, right? You like Bobby. So like, you think that there's a good and Bobby enough to say, Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's like, Well, so then how about you focus on the good qualities rather than the negative qualities? And she's like, Oh, oh, yeah. What a weird, what an interesting thought. I'm like, Shervin, and then Resilie's a table, too. He's like, I gotta get up and go to. Oh, well, no, that wasn't about me. This is about you. And then he leaves. And then we get to see him and Asa cry about how poor Reza. Oh, my God. Well, no, well, well, the things that that was like a whole different dinner party because that's that was at that was afterwards after this fight. When do these people have my fitness pal? How are they eating in every single scene? That's the that was the scene that the dinner party scene was the scene where MJ was wearing literally a doily that had been stretched around her body. Thailand's like, I'm sorry. We love the fat girl dress like a whore because she'll do well here. Otherwise, you guys have to leave because we're at a restaurant for you to film in. Sorry. Yeah. The Thailand City Council has asked you to leave. Bye. Yeah. And I also love, by the way, when Bobby changed his room after his big blood, like he changed his room and Asa literally is like, you changed your room. Like be a man. What is like? Why are you you're constantly emasculating this guy? Like anything he does is like not manly suddenly. Oh, we get a little scene. We got a couple little scenes in here that were funny. Gigi talking about how she really likes this guy that she's dating and she can't understand it because he doesn't have cats, but he has a truck and that's bad ass. No, it's not. Yeah. And also he's an asshole for having a giant truck in LA where the parking spaces are tiny and I'll bet he takes up two spaces at Ross dress for less. So fuck your boyfriend too. And then she's like, he's weird. He says things to me like make love. He's like nice to me. Yeah. She's like rose. I'm not turned on by passion. It's disgusting. I mean, I even wrote shit on my back for people to read while they fuck me. So they're not passionate. It's like the ingredients list of fruit loops on my back. So I don't have to listen to them saying anything passionate. Yeah. And then, and then me while somewhere in the midst of all of this, someone probably awesome. Maybe Reza was like, let's write an elephant in Adam's honor. Like, like, you know, clearly this is such like damage control. Like, no, you just want to write an elephant, which is fine. You should write an elephant and you know that Adam would want to write it. You're not to write in his honor. You just want to, you just want to say that so people aren't like mean to you. The whole problem is that Adam won't write an elephant at home. Why do you think he's going to be touched by this? Yeah, exactly. Oh, fine. You wrote that elephant. Yeah, he's not going to be happy about that. And then we get a shot of all of them rating the first class lounge. Yeah, this is actually on the airlines, which by the way, is going to get zero business from anybody who's watched his show because I'm not going on any airline that would let that people let those people on. You know that Malaysia era is kind of like, well, this is fucking bullshit. Like, we lose two planes and they're the ones that get the shots. Like, we're the ones losing business and they're like, Jesus, actually, they should be happy. They should be like, finally, finally. There's any time for a plane to get lost. Yeah. Um, let me see here. So they get to sing where they're so wasted that Gigi is like rolling around on the ground and showing like pulling down her pants and showing her thong to the camera. And we're basically seeing a reenactment of the night. And I cannot wait to see who she accuses of mentally raping her after this, especially when they showed also are not awesome, Reza putting his toe in her butt crack. Because you know, there's like an almost rape charge coming up. I know too much passion for Gigi. Next season, I can what friend lets their toe try and fuck their other friend when they're drunk in a first class lounge. I'm using a lie detector test. I want your toe to apologize for forgetting that he tried to fuck me in the first class lounge. We all know that a toe is supposed to go to market. Okay, not my ass. Where do those toes go back to? Okay, what do you want to guess? Is it eating or is it awesome Bobbie fighting? That's all of the above. Oh, that's the same time. And then they finally get some private time. And she's like, what? He said, babe, we've got to work on our relationship. And she's like, what? I mean, what do we need to work on? Are you going to support me? If I quit my job, are you going to support me? What? How do those two equal? What are you talking about? Yeah, talking about that is like, we need to work on a relationship. It's like, I'm just going to quit my job. Let's keep this on track. Yeah, let's you guys are stupid enough to fight about real things without bringing up your resume. I don't I don't even get these two. Hey, you made a pun resume. Can we just pretend that they're not on the show anymore? Are they in it? Ken Bravo, just drop them. Whoever cast them should actually be fired from reality TV. Yeah, that's a pretty bad casting decision. Terrible. Me as to I just wrote, why does everybody on the show always try and break each other up? I can't believe no one's tried to break up MJ and her boyfriend yet. Give it time. Give it time. They're next. But yeah, everybody's advice to each other is dump your boyfriend or girlfriend. Yeah, or or resume. Okay, I wrote poor resume again. So what happened here? People leave the dinner one by one. Poor Reza. I feel the way to keep my pain inside. Yeah. Well, no, I think what happened was that also was like, guys, I'm sorry, I have to leave. I'm just feeling like a wave of sadness and I just have to leave and like console myself with diamond water. And then Reza is like, shit, she can't be sadder than me because I'm the one who technically did not bring my fiance. So he's like, hey, that's so Persian. I also feel a wall of sadness. It's like the tsunami came back in, but the tsunami was made of sadness. I'm going to my bedroom. I'm going to watch that movie about the tsunami, but it's going to be me played by that lady from the ring. I'm going to be bad to make movie jokes. You remember every movie, every movie in every star that's ever been in it. And I'm like, Hey, that girl whose friends with Nicole Kidman from Australia is also in that movie about a tsunami. Naomi Watts. Like, Naomi, what's the deal with tsunamis? Hmm. Do you know how many people lost their underwear on the tsunami? Adam would have such a boner here. I can't believe I didn't bring him. Yeah, at least at the end, Reza kind of brought it back around to Adam and not just himself when he was saying, you know, my boyfriend's at home crying. And here I am, you know, in a, you know, in the place we were supposed to get married. At least he added that in there because that's kind of the first time he's acknowledged that it's his own fucking fault that all this is happening. Yeah, I can't feel sorry for him. Like, guys, awful. Adam, run, Adam, run, run. All right. Well, what a fat hairy guys in LA, boy. Yeah. Speaking of fat hairy guys, why don't we move on to the Real Housewives of Melbourne. Let's do it. Part one. Adam, I'd love to do nothing but sit around and watch internet porn and not have sex with you all day. I'm down. Call me. All right, Real Housewives of Melbourne. It's the reunion hosted once again by Alex Perry with sunglasses on his head. And who knows what on his face. And even more facial surgery this year. Jesus Christ. He's got temple veins like Kyle Richards, man. Yeah, this poor guy. That guy looks like a horror show. Men, stop it. Okay, stop it. We've come to accept women doing it because now they're just look, they're all from a different race of people and we understand men. It still does not look right. Okay. Yeah. Sorry that it's unfair. And also, if you're going to get your face done five times, why are you skipping the nose? Yeah. It's like he's only worried about temple veins. He's like, listen, I want you to do my temple veins. I want them to be giant and bulging and scary because they need to hold up the glasses. I'm never taking them off. He looks like he actually just came from the set of Mad Max Fury Road. He's like one of the strange extras with weird like tumors all over his body and strange veins. He's like, listen, I don't like talk about feminism. I'm part of the man's rights group now. We're not talking about feminism anymore. Damn it. Feminism. I'm boycotting. I'm boycotting Mad Max Fury Road because there weren't enough men saving the day or sunglasses on people's heads. So this episode, reunion part one for those of you who aren't following. Real Housewives of Melbourne has stolen a page from the Bravo book where they're, or maybe they did that. No, no, they have a reunion last year where they're showing like the backstage stuff first and all the ladies arriving. And the big news here is gamble without makeup. Still cute. Yeah. Sometimes I put on, sometimes I put on the makeup and sometimes I just, you know, maybe, maybe I'm bored with it. Maybe I'm Maybelline's. Maybe she's born with it. Maybe she's had enough beauty to find a man who works hard enough to have enough to pay for her to get it. And then we cut to Lydia who is sitting in the makeup chair. Lydia is the unofficial narrator of this show and explains shit that no one needs explanations for. Like, you know, the reunion is the time where we all get together and we talk about things that happen during the year. So here we are getting together and we're going to talk and maybe they'll be fighting. We know what this is. Shut up. Get your makeup on, girl. She's very dumb. And then Jackie, I'm psychic. So I'm picking up the other ladies' energies. I'm picking up their nerves. Everyone's really nervous. I'd feel it. The angels are telling me. They also tried to tell me some lottery numbers, but I said, no, I've got moral angels, all right. I always got to say what's on my mind. I always have to say what's on my mind. Unless I'm gambling, in which case is irresponsible for me as a psychic to say what's on my mind? Because I know I know the outcome. I know the outcome is going to win the reunion, but it would be irresponsible to me in case anybody's gambling on it. Gamble. Gamble, Janet. And Janet getting ready. She's like, I'm so sick of the room. I'm sick of talking about the room. I can't wait to talk about the room. I guess somebody else here was the one who told me about the room. Like Janet's big thing after all of this time coming back to the reunion is to bring up the things she doesn't want to bring up anymore. And now drag somebody else into it. Yeah. He's like, Alex Perry told me about the rumor. He was at the sex party. Alex Perry. Oh, better floors. I'm very nervous. I have nerves because Gina is going to bully me. I feel it coming. And then Alex Face. Yeah. That face of Alex. I just wrote Alex Face a few times. He is improving on Andy's opening thing where Andy is like, Hi, hi, Tamara. Hi, Gretchen. Hi, Vicki. He's doing the high thing, but he's like at least saying more stuff. You know, like, are they a jammy? Are you going to spill the tea? I mean, look, I've had more facial surgery than your son. No one's made a tea after me. Do you have a periwinkle tea, darling? Yeah, it's like, Chica, Chica, you're no longer such a fan sitter. You sort of slid off the fence a little bit. She's like, Oh, I guess I read the deed. I guess I read the deed, but never looked at photos on the fence. There's a lovely fence. I love the fence. Listen, I don't sit on fences. I normally find fences to be uncomfortable, you know, because they go right in the middle of your butt cheeks. But I will sit on a fence if it's part of the new friend's remodel, because if a friend is remodeled, their fence is most likely motorized. It's something gorgeous and exciting. And I'd love to come to the house to compliment it anytime I can. I just love it. I love this fence. I love what they've done there. It's very cheeky. I love it. What a lovely fence. I wish I could sit on it. I wish I could sit on it. It looks just so lovely. I have seven fences. I have seven fences for you to sit on. I created the fence. I was the one who invented fences. Yes, it's true. When I was young, I never had a fence, but now I have a fence. I had to work for it. I was proud in the town that I grew up in. There were dogs dying all over the city because no one had a fence. And then I invented them. So, you're welcome dogs for living. I switched the bitch fence. Let's see here. These women came ready to fight. They were fighting over the dumbest little, especially Lydia. Lydia came. I like that Alex Perry kind of knows what they want to talk about. Like he'll he'll ask the questions they want, but then put like a country lane on them, which I really like. He's like, Lydia, so Lydia, you know, this season you've kind of fall into the background. First of all, Lydia was never in the foreground. Lydia's always been the dumb one who doesn't know any English. She's always been that one. She was always in the background, but she's like, look, you know, sometimes it's really important because after last season, I just got attacked on the social media and by some long-faced people behind the computer, it was really mean. So this year I had to come on and be nicer. I like that they're so honest that Twitter shapes a housewives personality because that's basically true. And she's the first person who's ever said it out loud. Right. And for the honesty of Lydia. And by the way, Lydia's son is the one who got arrested for basically cyberbullying and like, I think posting revenge porn or something like that. So, she should be quiet before she starts like lashing out of people on the internet making being mean to others. Well, yeah. I mean, she's being bullied, like, if you think about it, she's complaining about being bullied after she was a bully. So, I don't think it works like that. Sorry. I thought you were supposed to be tolerant. Why do you hate racists? All right. God, I've got so many notes. We don't need to talk about all of this. Petty Flores switched the bitch necklace. Oh my god. Omarosa's gonna sue that necklace too. She's gonna be like, I want the book royalties and I want whatever that necklace costs. Yeah, she certainly will. She will go right after that as she should. Although, I mean, Omarosa, you should know better. Just stay away from that necklace. It's just a tacky piece of shit. I got on a boardwalk of any beach. I love that. Yeah, they both stole the title from some necklace on Ben on Venice Beach. I really like that Lydia was like taking a back seat because of all the whiplash after last year. Oh god. Or backlash. She said whiplash. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Yeah. It's called back after all the backlash from last year. Yeah. It's the whiplash. My Nick really heard after the season last year. Jesus. Um, blah, blah, blah. Negative, blah, blah, genius. People are mean. Chica. I don't sit on fences. Blah, blah, blah. Gamble. Jeff. Campbell. Oh gosh. My about years got hot and so I got here. Things very well. So all I have to my only way here are things is I have to read the hands of Wolfie. Wolfie. Wolfie gives me sign language and he also reads science for me because being deaf is really hard to read things. I was walking into this street. It stops times until whoopie told me no. It says stop my peach. Peach. Am it now peaches? No. Wolfie is my miracle worker. Here's what he does is he puts his hands in my hands and it makes the symbols. Is that I know if I can cross the street or not? Well, she's going on about her deafness. I'm sorry I'm laughing at that. She's so obviously not deaf. I'm sorry. Being deaf is not why you don't know words because now you can say feminism. So whatever. I'll never understand that but I like Campbell so I'm going to leave her alone. But I love during her monologue about going deaf and like sad music is playing. They show Jackie's face and Jackie's had something done to her face. It looks really weird. And she squashes her face like she looks like she's disgusted but she's trying to give sympathy. That's her face she gives. She looks like he impressed darling. I just love it. Like I love when you have a new face that hasn't had a time to get worn in yet. It's like it's like boots. All right. You need to buy those boots a couple months before you actually have to wear them. But yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, Jackie sort of looks like someone's been strangling her and her face has gotten like sort of like puffed up. I think around this time is when Gamble talked about what she eats on a daily basis, right? But she was like, well, for breakfast, I have a cup of an espresso. And then for lunch, I have a slice of tomato. And then for dinner, I have, you know, just not not rice and not bread. And that's it. I love that. Mike, my life model is a calorie count. Okay. And then he said, well, how many calories do you have a day? And she said, around 1500, which there's no way. And they said, well, I thought you said you had that in a day. She's like, well, I can't do that every day. I have 500. She said 500. Some days, 1500. And that's called a real diet. All right. So the first real diet I've heard about on one of these shows just don't eat. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So now's a clip where they're showing about the Gina and Gamble love affair and how they were friends. And now they're so close to even Gamble has Gina's same evil chuckle when they're in the car together. They're both like, and single white female. And she's like, I don't want to become losing the white female. I mean, I'm white. And I'm female, but I don't want to be single. It's like they're calling me jobless. I have a job. His name is it's fair. How could I even say I'm single when I have a lot of power. They keep showing petafluor who said at the opening of this that she's really scared because everybody's going to bully her. And I'm freaking out. And every time they cut to petafluor, she's visibly shaking. And she keeps rubbing her nose. Have you noticed that she keeps sniffling and rubbing her nose with her thumbnail? I don't know what that's about, but some of that some of us would call that a coke cat. Some of us some of us whose previous diets include coke habits might call you out on that. Because some of them, I won't accuse you of anything. Yeah, I did not notice that. But you know, why not wife her nose every time they showed her she was shaking and wiping her nose with her thumbnail. Well, that's because she's very confident. And she got that from herself, you know, she had to get it from herself because she never had anyone to give her any sort of confidence or go gain. Nobody ever picked their nose before me before people would walk around with sick noses and couldn't breathe. Do you know how many people have died of suffocation before I showed them how to pick their nose with this thumbnail? So switch the swatch the bitch switch the bitch. Yeah, this is where my new buddy is like angry now for no reason. Yeah, I mean, even Gina or sorry, even Gina, especially Gina. So petafluor interrupts this, this lovely scene of gamble and Gina's love affair by going, oh, you're up how to ask all the time and gambles like, how dare you say I'm up somebody's ass and sniffing asshole. That is revolting your disgusting place. That was just revolting. And I don't I don't abide by that's language. It's exactly that. Petafluor should really be thrown into a pit with that language. Niving ass. You know, I don't like stripper. Are you saying I'm into an old sass when you say it's sniffing ass or you say up an asshole? Because that's a rumor. And you're trying to slam me, you're slamming me a wharfy. Time is the key of sniffing ass is because you hit a pretty fool. Everybody. So then we get the petafluor is a bitch montage. Yeah. And man, I forgot what a bitch petafluor. I mean, no, I didn't forget, but I forget all the scenes. I mean, literally, it's since the first scene she's been a bitch. Yeah. Like the first the first thing you even see of her in this entire season is her just being fucking awful about everything and then making it with her son. Yeah. Yeah. Now, Petafluor is is just an awful person, awful little insecure person, just like chirping away about all her accomplishments and not realizing how just ingratiating she is. I mean, when she was talking about her book on this reunion, she's like, you know what? I had my 15 year old son edited. He did the editing on it. So that way it's raw. It's a raw, it's a raw book because he my son edited it. It's like, that does not make it raw, that makes it unprofessional. There's a fine line, a typo, a typo does not make something raw and real. Yeah, raw, it's not like a sub category on Pornhub. Okay, it's a book. People don't want to read raw books. Okay, they want to read books that are written by professionals and edited. You're dumbly. Yeah, this is raw. This is why I do not need book editors or publishers. I like it to be raw. Yeah, that's why I remember it. She's like, sorry. I'll go ahead. No, at one point, she's like, you know what? I publish this book selflessly for everyone. Oh, wow. Yeah. God, God bless you selflessly publishing a book against almost against your will. She's fake crying and sniffling the coke in her nasal cavities. She's like, I did this for other women. Selflessly, I gave this to this shit. I ain't free, bitch. This thing is some download pamphlet from your website. You are charging for this shit on the internet. Okay. She's like, but I did it for other women. Look, I invented self help books. It came from the heart to go by the name Tony Robin, too much. Shut up. I inspired myself. I would like to inspire other women like I inspire myself. I listened to myself giving self help readings all day long while I exercise. Yeah. And then she wants Gamble to be supportive. She's like, well, why couldn't you be supportive? And it's like, well, you called her stupid without even knowing her. I mean, Gamble kind of won that when Gamble's like, I don't understand how you're going to have a book about empowering women when you called me stupid without even learning me and knowing me and saying that I really am stupid. This fight was really cute, actually, because it's like petafluor's memory of things is so off. She's like, well, yes, I did bring up the fact that she gets money from her husband, but it was only because she was questioning me about my money. So I'm so sorry. I asked her one question like, no, you basically stood there in a bar and be little to her for a good 15 minutes. Yeah, fuck yourself and walked away. And then they showed clips of that. And every time it comes back to petafluor, she's like, no, this is not what happened. All I said, it's like, bitch, it's a video montage of you. What are you arguing with? Are you going to argue? And then also not me stealing from a 7/11. It is me asking the 7/11 if I could please have these M&Ms. And then they called me at Kant. And so I took them. Yeah. After video. And then in the middle of all this, gamble, you know, there was like question like, well, what makes, what makes gamble? What makes gambas opinion about this? What is shopping in matter? And she's like, well, I used to get a newspaper. And then Lydia's like, well, what did you do at the magazine? She's like, well, I, I sort of kept it together. And then he's like, do not talk to me like that. Don't talk to me like that. Hey, dare you. What a normal person. But she, I think, tell me if I'm wrong, because I really, this is just how I remember it. Maybe I have a petaflora memory. But gambles. I ran a, I ran a magazine. And Lydia goes, columnist. And she's like, hey, how, what, how dare you? They started fighting. And then Lydia is like, I just innocently asked if you were a columnist. I mean, I didn't even say anything. You fucking liar. You sat there and went, columnist. He's like, what? How dare you speak to me like that? Don't yell at me like that. Missy, I won't talk it. Yeah. I like that. Like only on this show could uttering the word columnists be used as an insult. Columnist. Oh, Lydia. How awful. Lydia has a new chin. Got that in profile. Yeah. Big, big old chin. Big chin. Big chin. And I have a big chin. And I have a naturally big chin and hers is real big. Yeah, she was going for that. She got the Heidi Montag old chin. She's like, whoa, full from America. By the way, you know, pretty horrible. Lydia just wanted to fight, but she's done nothing all season. So now she's fighting over shit like this. Oh, I didn't say that. I asked you an innocent question. You're turning her into Australia and Resa. That's so Persian. How dare you? That's so Persian. Meanwhile, Gina was a little bit like a testy this episode. She even went after Chica app for like no reason. She was like, oh, you're a little bit of your friends with everyone, which makes me think that your friends with no one. Chica's like, well, I rather don't like that. Okay. What do you ever? Yeah. She's like, she's like the, like, she's like, yeah. She's like, hey, Chica, you're awfully agreeable on. She goes, well, you know, I'm just an agreeable person. Well, that makes me think you have new friends. Well, I guess you're right. Because I'm agreeable. Chica's even agreeing about being too agreeable. Yeah. But I like that Gina hurls. That is an insult. I know. It's not like a. Okay, Chica. Yes, you're agreeable, aren't you? Look at you being agreeable over there. Everything that people say, you're agreeable and nice about it. Why are good for you? Oh, look at Chica agreeing. Yeah. Like, what's wrong with that? Like, you know, I love me some Gina, but like, I don't understand what her beef was with Chica being agreeable. Like, oh, look at you. You got manners. That's real good. We're going to call you Missy Manners. I'm thinking it just comes. Well, first we know that there's huge problems already because Chica wrote her little, I shouldn't say her little blog, like it's in a big deal. I didn't even mean it like that. But Chica wrote some blog about the reunion experience, like a bravo blog. And I think I read some of it at one point, but she was saying, nice things kind of about everybody, but she doesn't really have anything nice to say about Gina ever. And that BuzzFeed thing they did where they have to say one word about every housewife. Yeah, she didn't even have something nice to say about then. Yeah. So we've known that Chica's pretty pissed off. But I think that Gina doesn't like her because, you know, Gina gets in trouble for speaking her mind. And Gina or Chica never speaks her mind. She never gets to say anything. That's true. Unless it's about she stole all names. I'm not comfortable with her trying to sell books with her shoes with my name on them. Well, Chica did say something because she did try to call out Gina. She was like, you're never accountable. You never accountable. You know what? Like we all said that we like Lydia's remodel. And you never said anything about it. You have to be accountable for that. But she's right. I mean, I love Gina. But she there are sometimes when she needs to be a little bit more accountable than she is, for sure. Well, I love Gina because she's a bitch. So like, I'm not mad at her for being a bitch because I don't think she's hateful. I think she's just funny and people can't take it. Yeah. And usually that's where I am. But yeah, she is. She definitely came to this one just trying to start a fight with everybody. She sort of didn't make sense. There's one point where she and Jackie started to get mad at each other. And Gina told this whole convoluted story. She's like, well, you see, I was at this party. And then my partner was there. And then so it was pitiful as part. And now they know each other. And then Jackie was afraid because, you know, back then there was a threat. And then she didn't want to be protected. And then there was like, you know, dilated peoples and everything like that. And so there's a bogan and running around. And we went upstairs. Did you do? And actually, you know, there was a balcony and staying on the balcony. And she wanted to get the balcony. The doors locked. And I couldn't get away. And there was a ghost in this one to one to land. And you know, that's what happens. Like what? And that she was just trying to help me by locking me outside because I was on balcony number five. And the other guy was on balcony number four. And he could have gotten me. She thought it was a balcony number four. Gina was just trying to help me at the end of the day. It's like, what are you two fighting or not? What do you think? And Jackie's like, I love Gina. I think she's great. But sometimes I want to punch her in the car. And then they show Gina and she's like, Oh, love Jackie. She's wonderful. And they show them fighting again. Yeah, that story was weird. So that was about head of floor's party, right? And they were both there. And Gina was sticking up for Jackie. She's like, well, you know, there was a problem. You know, the whole problem really stemmed from the fact that my partner was there. And Jackie's partner was there. And they we didn't put him on camera because no one would understand who they are. But then they started fighting and threatening each other. Well, I mean, what was it? There was some threat. And then Jackie was scared of a threat. And then I don't even know what happened. I rewind it twice also because it was just fun to watch him say how much they liked each other and then call each other. Yeah, exactly. But then my favorite part of the reunion was at the end when they were, I don't even remember Petty Flair's story, but she was recalling some issue that she had with Gina. And Jackie was there and Janet was there. And all I know is that Petty Flair, Petty Flair accused Gina of doing something. Maybe you can feel it. And I watched this literally an hour and a half ago. And I still can't remember the details of this story. They were doing some promotional. They were somewhere. They were some, I thought it was a TV appearance, but they were somewhere. And Petty Flair is saying, and Alex asks her, and she's like, well, you know, I'm very embarrassed about this. It's an embarrassing story. But Gina was fighting with somebody. And I got dragged into it. And all the ladies are just laughing, like ultimately pointing at her. Yeah, like hysterical, like tears coming out of their eyes. Petty Flair tells this particular story. And then Janet's like, first of all, you were fighting with me darling, right? That's really funny. Because you told Gina she wasn't even a lawyer. I never said this. This, I never said, like darling, how do you even remember you were drunk? And she's like, that's it. How dare you? How dare you accuse me of drinking? I do not drink. No more than two drinks at a time. No more. No more. I do not get drunk drinking. Two drinks is still drinking, right? Listen, we just watched Dr. Phil. Okay, she never said how big the containers were. All right. She's had two inches of drinks. Me and Kim Richards. She didn't get drunk. And then she, of course, not acting like an out of control drunk who's been on coke all day, you know, as she has been, she gets up and starts acting like a cokehead who's been drunk all day and screaming and yelling and storming off the set. And the ladies just laugh and laugh. They just continue to laugh. I love these ladies. I want them to be every, I wish every Real Housewives show could just be these ladies in different cities. Yeah, like next week, it's the Real Housewives of New York. But it's still them just. Yeah, because it's kind of amazing because Jackie and Gina were just yelling at each other, calling each other cunts. And then like seconds later, Petty Fleur starts with the story and Jackie's like, that's not what happened. Gina didn't do that. Like she comes immediately to the defense of Gina. And then like they just are all they just, they're like, there's one thing these women can agree on is that Petty Fleur is full of shit and they don't care. And once Petty Fleur comes for them, they all just band together and just shoot her out of the room. Well, while she was crying, when she was crying and doing her whole, I wrote this for other women. So the thing could be like me. She's like fake crying and Janet is laughing her. No, no, she has like a noise. She's like, yeah, she's full of shit. Janet goes, there's no tears even coming at. She's not crying. It's all bullshit. I don't even know how to sit here. It's awkward to even sit here and listen to it. I know. Petty Fleur is so stupid crying. And her book, it was like three episodes into the season when she was talking about the parts of her book that she'd outlined or she'd written part of it. And then by four episodes later, she had published it. I'm like, this is not a book that was written to help people. This is a book that you just rush out onto market. It's like taking one of our blog posts and deciding to self-publish it and dump lots of money into it and then be righteous about it. And there's like two pages in that book. I mean, the cheesecake factory menu is longer than that book. Yeah. And bigger. Oh, and then she read an excerpt from it. Oh, God. She read the intro, didn't she? Yeah. Yeah. An excerpt of the intro. Dear women. Hello, I'm Petty Fleur. Do you think I'm better than you? It is because I am. But you can maybe try to be better and more like me, like this book is terrible. What are you doing? My son edited it. I couldn't believe my 15 year old son edited it. I mean, and the funny thing is on Amazon, like all the reviews are about like all these grammatical errors and and typos. These are the ones you just bought an $8,000 suit for because he's getting fired soon. Like here you are, your first suit for data entry. He's like getting it all wrong. I loved the Jackie and Gina fight too, because not only do they love each other, but then I love when Jackie turned it all political and started standing up for the working man. She's like, when you called me a bogey, I mean, that was awful. You're basically making fun of working class people. So you make fun of me because I'm working class. What a horrible thing to do to the working class people of Australia. People who listen, watch this show, the demographic. I hope you're all happy now. This is who you like. Gina's, Gina's defense is, I wasn't calling all all of Australians bogans. I was, I wasn't calling bogans bogans. I was calling you a bogey. Yeah. Who cares if you offend a bogey and they're awful women. They're slow, used up awful women, whatever she said. Well, it's funny because it's like calling someone white trash and then having that person be like, I can't believe you would say that that's so offensive to the workers of the world that you would call them white trash. Like, no, we're not, we're not calling the workers, the middle class white trash calling you white trash a stupid idiot. It's too bogey. Bogey, you're offensive to pwn people. And then Gina's like, well, you know, how this all started. She told me, you're worn. Oh God. Jackie told me you're worn up. So funny. So then it becomes a fight over whether or not Gina is a legal aid lawyer or not. Why can nobody figure out what kind of lawyer Gina is? Isn't it on a website someplace? Like, how do people even know if they're going to hire Gina or not? And why does it even matter, by the way, why, why, it's like, he's one will find any sort of thing to debate. I hear that you have more flat than you do than you have high heels. No, how do you do that? I never said that. I've just heard it. People talk about it, but I don't have flips at all. Yes, you do. I hear your legal aid, not a prosecutor. I'm a prosecutor. No, I hear you leave. You said your legal aid. No, I mentioned the word legal aid. No, you didn't. You mentioned the word lemonade, not legal aid. What? So, Chica, what did you think of? What did you think of the book? Switch the bet. Well, if first, I couldn't understand why she would be calling women bitches, but then I read the book and I thought, wow, how wonderful she's calling women bitches. So, now I totally agree. Gina's like, pussy. I love this show. What did she say to her? She like started getting on her for complimenting someone. So, now anytime Chica says anything nice, Gina's like, oh, shut up. No one buys it, don't they? Shut up your fence sitting, Logan. Let's see. I publish magazines. We've already been over that. We've already been over the gene I said. How much more happened in this? Oh, I've only got a few more notes. That means we're almost at the end of it innocently fight. I don't even know what I'm saying. I don't even know what the point is in me writing all these notes. I can't goddamn read them. Yeah, I just, I think the last thing I wrote was the lawyer thing before the drunken tirade that I love that drunken tirade. I hope that they have half the show next week dedicated to Lydia trying to talk her into it because they show clips and Lydia's like, you've got to be a big girl and come back to the set. What are little girls across India going to think when they see you acting like this? You need to selflessly come back to the sets so you can instruct women. Yeah, cut to the other women. They're like, what are you laughing over and over again? Jesus, so funny. Love this show. I know. I'm so sad. Only one more episode left, but then we have also all sorts of good stuff premiering very soon because Shah's is ending next week. Well, season finale then reunions. This show has, it looks like we have one more episode of this show and then then we transition into like Orange County and Merritt and Medicine and a new show about women. That's not a housewife show, but it's secrets and wives. Secrets and wives. Which is funny because I just rewatch secrets and lies over the weekend. How about that? That's fun. You know what I, you know what I call a show about secrets and wives? I think it should be called secrets and lies. Oh, that's the pun. I didn't realize that. I just want them to bring Andrea out now. Just bring her out for five minutes. I was thinking that I'm like, by this time, like I feel like she should be well in the way to divorce soon. And then once she's divorced, then she'll come back on the show because you know what's her husband is clearly being like, get off this show right now. You're killing my business darling. But he probably already so upset. He's probably already so upset with her that like they're well on their way to divorce and then she'll come back and be awful. Yeah, so we're well, we're on the way. I said I was going to say well on the way. I just say everything that I just heard. I'm just a repeater. But yeah, we're this is the calm before the storm because we're let on shows this week, but next week is gonna be an obelanch. Yes. What's that? Candy's ski trip? Yeah, I am. Candy, I had to walk from the hallway bathroom to the kitchen. Have some respect, Candy. That is wrong. I was actually upset when I got home and found out that there was no candy ski trip. I know. Me too. But I figured that was what was going to happen. I wanted to see those old ladies get mad about something. You ruined my week. See you now again. See you now Memorial Day. See you run with rally. See you now rally. All right. Wrap it up then, darling. All right, darling. This is enough. Enough of these strange little noises on making. So if you've made it to this part of the podcast, congratulations. We are so happy. Don't forget to buy a mattress and we are at facebook.com/watchwalkrapins. You can support us, patreon.com/watchwalkrapins. And if you support us, you get access to a bonus episode. And this week, again, is about Mad Max, the feminist controversy surrounding Mad Max, the Duggers, and us getting on our soapbox about hypocrisy in that clan. It's actually more fun than it sounds. So thank you all for listening. Find us on social media at watchingraprapins.com. And guess what? We will be back on Thursday to discuss Real Housewives in New York at the Southern Charm season finale. Thanks, everyone. Bye. If you like listening to comedy, try watching it on the internet. The folks behind the side show network have launched a new YouTube channel called Wait For It. It's got interviews with comedians like Reggie Watts, Todd Glass, lies a slice finger, slicing, driving friends with it for 10 years. One of the funniest people out there and I still have a hard time with the last name, Liza. Our very own Owen Benjamin, that's me, takes you on a musical journey down internet rabbit holes and much more. You don't have to wait any longer. Just go to youtube.com/waitforaccomedy. There's no need to wait for it anymore because it's here and it's funny and I love you. To the insurance company that did me wrong, I've moved on and I'm happily insured with another. Bless your peep-picking heart. It was just never meant to be betwixt us. You gave me automobile insurance apprehension and gaco has come along in just 15 minutes giving me new car insurance and made me as duplant as a newborn lamb in springtime. And Paul has given gaco his approval. That's one thing you never had. Joyful with another. Clara May in Colombia. Gaco. 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance. If you like Watch what Crap-ins, you can listen ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey at Wondery.com/survey. Have you ever wondered who created that bottle of sriracha that's living in your fridge? Or why nearly every house in America has at least one game of monopol? Introducing the best idea yet. A brand new podcast about the surprising origin stories of the products you're obsessed with. Listen to the best idea yet on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts.