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Watch What Crappens

#132: You Got the Wrong One Now, B**h!

Duration:
1h 25m
Broadcast on:
18 Jun 2014
Audio Format:
other

Ben Mandelker (bsideblog) and Ronnie Karam (TrashTalkTV) are back to talk crap about Real Housewives of Orange County, Real Housewives of New York, Kandi?s Wedding, and Ladies of London. Come on in, just please don?t show us any panties.
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Oh, hello there, Ronny. What's going on? Nothing. I hope you hear a smile on my voice because they're sure a big one on my face. Oh, I hear it. I can practically see it. I can smell it, actually. Oh, no. I hope you can, because it's like that Starbucks coffee death breath. It's like that dog breath in a Starbucks. Sorry, everybody. Do you smell that? I've been going to coffee shops so much recently that the Starbucks death smell is actually very comforting to me right now. I appreciate it. You can find Ben on the old internet at beasteyedblog.com, and you can also find him on all the social media outlets at beasteyedblog. Yes. Those include Instagram, Twitter, Vine, Duolingo. Yes, actually. No, actually no. My Duolingo name is something else. Sorry. You can probably find me on anything else though, beasteyedblog. And me, Ronnie Carum, you can find on Twitter at Ronnie Carum, or on Instagram at Ronnie Carum, or on Vine at Ronnie Carum, or you can find the website feeds for funny recaps and stuff like that at trashtweetTV for Twitter, trashtalkTV on YouTube, but T-E-E-V-E-E. I'll be doing Big Brother in two minutes videos all summer long there. I guess that's it, right? Well, also, our Facebook page is very important. Oh, yeah. Sorry. No, I forgot to mention it. So if you guys want to talk throughout the week about the shows that are going on and just talk to each other and make us laugh, please come to the Watch What Crap and Facebook page. It's at facebook.com/watchwhatcrapins, and we're going to try and be a little more active on our Twitter feed, which is @wetcrapins, but right now, it's mostly all at the Facebook page, which is hilarious. Yeah, we had a lot of activity this week. I mean, you know, I just posted a random thing for Father's Day. I think you just get like 20 likes or something like that, and it has, I think, 245 likes, which, shockingly, I think that's our most like thing, and I'm not saying that to congratulate myself, although I guess I am doing that. It's more like how awesome it is that people are coming to this page, and they are joining in on all the jokes, and they're active, and they're posting all sorts of fun stuff. It's really hilarious. Yeah, it's a good time. So come on over, everybody, and thank you to everybody who's over there right now. We just put every week we record on Wednesday afternoons, around two o'clock Pacific time, and while we're recording, we start a thread for stuff that you want to talk about. So we'll be reading that throughout the show today. The first thing on here is the bug dress. Mm-hmm. It's hilarious. Okay, so today we'll be talking about the Real Housewives of Orange County of New York. Ladies of London. Yeah. Candy's wedding. Uh-huh. We will not be discussing married to medicine, because frankly, I've had enough of your crap married to medicine. All right. Get less stupid. We can only take on so much. I still love the show, but you know, Ron and I, if we watch too many of these shows, we won't actually have money to support ourselves. So unless people want to start donating to us, then we can watch all the broader shows that you want. But for right now, I think we had to give a little bit of a cut to married to medicine. Yeah, until it gets good. And we will trust you guys to tell us when that is, but right now, it's a big no for me. Um, although I did read this week that Mariah is starting a new diet with her husband called the Cinnamon Girl Diet, and it's because she wants to help Black ladies get thinner with her diet pills and protein bars. Now, I'm, I'm not sure. But the last time I looked at Mariah, I wasn't totally, I wouldn't think she is the, uh, the model of weight loss right now. I think that's why she's doing like a Black Girl Diet, because she doesn't want to be like, I still think she wants to be like, I got booty. So what? I mean, she can't just like, make it general because everyone would be like, you're fat. What she sure did was, uh, have a diet called the chair diet, where you like sitting in the chair and then like, you sit there for like 12 days straight and don't, you know, anything and then you lose weight. It's like, Oh, Call Eugene, you got the last weight. You just sitting in the chair. You sitting, you sitting down and telling me you standing, honey, you said you got a cinnamon top, but all I smell is nutmeg. All I see is in a mine. Thanks, squad. Thanks for that brilliant thought, mom, which we cannot eat because we're on a cinnamon girl diet. Yeah. Okay. So let's move on to some real housewives of something. Which one do you want to talk about first? Um, why don't we talk about New York since it was last night as the freshest in my brain. New York just happened in my house. It just ended right when I pressed record on the podcast. I was pressing stop on New York. Wow. Well, then a super fresh in your brain. I mean, you just said right before the podcast, you're like, Oh, nothing happened this week, which I guess could sort of be true. But I thought the New York episode was hilarious because mainly for Aviva and her asthma. And because the whole thing is that this week, all of a sudden out of nowhere, she has debilitating asthma. We've yet to see her actually cough or wheez or have shortness of breath, but she has debilitating asthma. And don't question me, you know, don't question my illness. Look at all these medications I have. Look at my doctors. No, don't question me. You bitch. You're being a bitch. You know, Aviva should realize she's in the wrong when she starts using the word creepy to defend herself. Like you're being creepy. Cause you know the last one who did that was Kelly Benson on your creepy. Yeah. And no one's creepier than you and your freaking father, dude. It's like, at least we can have an argument because your dad's balls isn't in our face. Well, my favorite was later on in the episode to back up everyone, the issue is that the women are heading to Montana for their trip and Aviva doesn't want to go. So she's concocted this whole thing that she has like terrible, terrible asthma, the kind that, you know, it's like there should be a banner over every place that she goes congratulating her from getting out of bed from getting out of the bubble in which she is living now. These were ridiculous. They're acting like Montana is this filthy, disgusting, whole and it's like nature. Yeah. Thank you. Well, I mean, Heather, Heather was hilarious when she was like, you know, people moved to Montana because they have asthma. They want to get out of the city, you know, with all the smog, you know? Yeah. So stupid. And one of our, one of our listeners, by the way, made a great point, which was like, where was this asthma when Aviva went to the family farm to look at, you know, the old machine that chopped off her leg? Oh, good point. You know, it's like very convenient to have this asthma comes in and out. Well, I guess that that farm is already covered with her DNA from all the blood that was said there. So maybe it was kind of like an antidote for the. Yeah. I think so. Also, by the way, I mean, another moronic thing is does she think people in Montana don't have asthma? You know, there are people in that state and there are probably people who have asthma in that state. And guess what? They're not keeling over as a result, like, ah, must flee the state. I have asthma. Yeah. She acted like she was being invited to like the Jesus birth party in a barn or some shit where she was going to have to stand there and deal with like wise men and sheep and shit. She's like, just not going to be any room at the end. I'm not going to a hotel without a room. I have asthma. I know she's not going to be, she's not going to be doing hoe downs every day. Because the Jesus born every minute. This isn't about you, Ronnie. This is about the children with asthma and no legs. I don't know. This is about the asthmatic children with no legs. Yeah. Well, God bless them. At least they wouldn't. It wouldn't hurt to run around the block. So I guess, I guess Montana will not be a stop on whatever book tour she concocts up next. Oh, Montana, but you know, I don't know if it's that they were complaining the whole time about how boring Montana is, but it immediately put me to sleep. I was like, I guess they're right, Montana is boy. It did actually extremely boring. It looked beautiful, but totally boring. I mean, there was nothing going on there. I mean, that was going on anywhere they go, really. All they do is sit around the house and bitch at each other anyway. It's not okay, so they'll bitch at each other in a really beautiful home instead of like embarrassing themselves at a brunch somewhere. Who cares? Same to it. The point is Bravo did not want to throw any money at this woman. This is actually worse than when they sent the Jersey cast to go on a road trip and have him camp out in a parking lot. You know, this is like, okay, we're just going to put you in a field in a fairly nice house. And that's it. It's like a VRBO. Oh, we lost the city. I can't believe it. I was a city. I can't believe we're not in the city. That New Yorker attitude really gets on my fucking nerves sometimes. It's like, you guys, New York is stairs, dirty things, homeless people, and the smell of Pete. Okay? Like, shut up with yourself. Everyone's so into themselves. It's like, you're so proud of yourself. You just paid $15 for a pack of cigarettes. That either makes you the richest person in the world or the dumbest fucking person in the world. And by the way, that's why I left New York. I left New York with cigarettes cost $10 a pack all back in the day. Yeah. Well, it's, you know, it was a population control. People don't realize that. It was to shoot people out, shoot the pours out of the city. Well, it happened. It worked. I, I don't know, I mean, I kind of loved that they were stuck in desolation. You know, clearly the producers were also fucking with him. I loved also when they arrived and the receptionist was like, oh, here have some complimentary huckleberry juice. I was like, my goodness, they are really partying on this vacation. Yeah. A little huckleberry juice. Party. Well, I mean, you, I was, I was sorry. Go ahead. I was just saying, it was, it was cracking me up with Ramona's like, well, you know what, I'll just have to sit here with my Ramona, Pinot Grigio and my huckleberry juice. And that's just the way it's going to be. Sorry. Sorry. I'm, yeah. She literally said, I'm sorry. I got excited because we can make a gift out of that later. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. I'm sorry. I'm just going to stay out here in Montana. I mean, you know, there's nothing to do here. It's boring. I don't want to eat me a manure. I don't want to eat me a manure. I'm sorry. My father, every day he would poop. Okay. That's something that my father would do. He would poop. So when I'm near a poop, whether it's from a horse or a human, I can't eat there. Okay. I'm sorry. I got in the bark shirt. There was a kitchen where we grew up or my mother would cook and the bathroom was right off the kitchen, which was really annoying because nobody really wanted to smell the bathroom before they were trying to eat in the kitchen, but every day my dad would come home at six and dinner was served at six fifteen and my dad would go into the bathroom and he would sit there until six thirty. And so when he would open the door, we would be halfway through dinner and we would smell poop and then he would throw a piece of spaghetti at my mom's head for being stupid. And you know what? I'm traumatized. I had to smell poop and watch my mom get abused with spaghetti. And you know what? I'm sorry. I just don't want to do it anymore. Okay. You know what? I can't even go buy a construction site anymore. I can't go buy a dump truck because when I see a dump truck, it reminds me how my father would take dumps. Okay? And my father would take a dump every single day and I just can't do it. Okay? So like one thing you have to understand is I have to have my Ramona Pinaigrijo and not be near anyone who's going to be taking a dump. One time I was eating at that Central Park restaurant called Tavern on the Green and I was sitting there and I was eating and there was this beautiful duck in a pond and it pooped and it reminded me of the time that my dad threw a dish at my mom and she had stuck and went there with the mixture of poop, I couldn't even finish my escarco. Okay? I'm sorry. Okay? But I can't do this. Okay. You know, I can't go to Chinese restaurants anymore because you know what? I like egg rolls. I like spring rolls. But one time Mario ordered a poop platter and then Bob poop and I could not deal. Even though there was no poop on the platter, the word poop was in there and I just couldn't do it. So you know what? I'm sorry. Okay. Okay. When I took Avery to college, I was in her dorm room and her roommate had brought us some lunch and so we were going to eat lunch together and I'll get to know each other. But the roommate had this calendar with a cat and it was hanging on a tree and it said I'm too pooped to pop and I couldn't even eat my lunch. One of the most defensive things that the Walt Disney company does is they release a movie called it's called Winnie the Pooh, okay? And I can't watch that, okay? Because my father poos also, okay? So I'm sorry. I won't be watching Winnie the Pooh, okay? Sometimes I set my alarm for the morning and you know, I want to get up because I want to be productive because I've got like 10 businesses. And so I want to eat breakfast first thing in the morning to get my brain working. But sometimes when I wake up, I look over at the alarm and it says snooze and it reminds me of poos and I can't even eat my breakfast. So I stopped eating alarms. When I was younger, okay? One thing that I can't do is I can't watch the Hogan family, okay? Because they have a neighbor named Mrs. Poole and Mrs. Poole sounds very much like Mrs. Poole, okay? So I really can't have that show on TV, okay? It's so stupid. Oh Ramona, Ramona remains the most interesting part of this show for me. I could just watch Ramona. First they went to the baths and she's being nice to Kristen, which was super awkward to watch. Yeah, that was funny. Well, funny that she's being nice to Kristen. And also I love that Kristen, at least she's consistent, you know, she nags a hell out of her husband, which bugs me, but at least she nags a hell out of everybody else too. Yeah. But she's just not believing a thing that Aviva's saying. I love that. I don't believe that. Well, maybe this doctor is your friend. Well, I have prescriptions. Well, maybe your friend wrote them, but it's a new doctor. So how can that possibly be my friend? And she's just like, "Of course it could be your friend." No. Because she laughs like that. I know, I actually loved how she wasn't backing down from Aviva's craziness. And although it was funny, she's like, "Aviva, I've defended you all this time. I've always defended you Aviva." I was like, "No, I seem to remember you going up to Aviva at kindergarten and being like, what are you doing Aviva?" And Aviva having to say, "Shut the fuck up. You must get the fuck out of it." Yeah. She's not really stood up for Aviva. But let's talk about Kristen's asshole husband for a moment, okay? Because he's an asshole. So she's going away for a week to Montana for this trip, okay? Which is probably contractually obligated, et cetera. So she's leaving the kids with Josh, her husband. And Josh is like, "Okay, well, I'm basically, I'm going to leave the kids with grandparents and then we go off to the Hamptons and party the whole time." Which to me seems like... Completely logical. I mean, I would do it because I don't like kids. But it seems not very fatherly, wouldn't you agree? No, I think we were just raised differently. I'm from El Paso, Texas, where you get maids because they're across the border, like which is your backyard. And so they just walk on over every day or sleep in your house and they work for super cheap because of the dollar conversion rate back in those days. And so we were all raised by maids where I come from. And that's just how it is. Our parents never did shit with us. They were like, "Bye!" We would see them like, "My mom would wake up from her nap when we came home from school after her long day of drinking Franzia at junior league. She would say, "Hi, my dad would come home at seven. They would go out." That was it. I'm used to it. At least you got to see them. You got to see them. I mean, this guy is really like pawning off his kids so he could go off and party the Hamptons. Now of course, party in the Hamptons is great. Well, that's great. You know, that's why you have a job. I'm not having kids until I can afford somebody to raise those fuckers. I'm not missing a holiday because my kids are wanting to spend time with me. They shit themselves. Like, how many people do you want to spend time with this shit themselves? Admit it. Well, this is why I don't want to have a kid. This is why I don't even want a dog. Well, dogs don't shit them. Well, sometimes I guess they do like a shit. What are you talking about dogs? Well, shit, wherever they can. They shit outside. Unless you don't open the door for them and then they'll just shit. They will. They should have side because they're like trained sort of. But at least they're not like cats who just shit inside on purpose. Like when I go to my friend's house with cats, I'm like, oh yeah, you have a cat. And I remember that not because I see your cat, but because it smells like cat shit. Thanks for having me over. Well, they are. But you know what though? Cats, they shouldn't in kitty litter and then they like to cover it up. At least the cats have some sense of like, um, cleanliness. And cats are consistently cleaning themselves. You know, there's there is some bar that I feel like cats have. Dogs clean themselves. What dare you? Oh yeah, that's true. They do. I just feel like cats are a little bit more anal retentive about it. No, you like cats because cats are colder and I like dogs because dogs are warmer. Do you see? No, I like cats because I think cats are cuter. I think they're funnier and they also are much less work and they again, they they go to a corner and they shit and they cover it up themselves. That's all I ask out of any animal. Well, that doesn't do that, babies. They shit all over the place and they sit in it until you decide that you're going to clean it up. Yeah. So fuck babies. Okay. There, I just said it. Fuck you babies. All across America. Fuck you. Sitting on yourself. I think they know what they're doing. They just think they're hilarious. You're really setting yourself up for a charming holiday movie where a baby is left on your doorstep and you learn greater lessons about life. Yeah. Oh, it's just a warm spot in my lap in the middle of the winter. Oh, it's a good thing. No, it's shit. You know, there's always like a TV show where there's or a movie where someone is like, it's always like a busy executive who doesn't have time for this or that. And then all of a sudden a baby is left to them on their doorstep or buy like a distant relative and suddenly they have like a baby in their life and they're dancing around with the baby in the apartment trying to get to go sleep playing like 60s Motown or something like that. And it's always like, huh, what a charming movie. If you think about that, that is like the scariest movie of all time. Could you imagine all of a sudden you have to take care of a baby for the rest of your life? Like that's like no more like sitting around watching the housewives and eating pizza. That's like, of course, what do you think? Who do you think's watching the housewives a bunch of like gay guys with jobs? No, it's a bunch of moms. I know. I know that. I meant more just like staying, you know, not more like watching the way we do, which is in a total slacker eating the lint out of our belly button, Wade, which I know also moms do too, but I'm basically sticking up for all the moms on our Facebook page right now. I'm not sure. They've all stopped for one second, at least in their life. Fuck you, babies. Fuck you. No, the moms right now are because I've been in this position before where I've spattered off about this. And this is what moms do. They smile knowingly and they're like, this little shit, this little shit. He doesn't know what he's talking about or someday he will be eating his words. Yeah. And hopefully not his poop like cats often do. So let's see, what else happened anyway, my point is I would not, just because your wife is going out of town, why doesn't she feel bad that she planned a trip on that weekend? Why does he have to feel bad about it? I will say this. I do agree. That's shitty that this trip is on Labor Day weekend for everyone involved because that is one there to be fun parties in the Hamptons, like why make everyone lose out? Do it just the weekend after Montana will still be there, but the party has to deal with his damn kids all the time. I stay take a break. Leave them alone. Those kids don't have jobs. No, but I'm saying I'm saying Chris the entire Montana trip in the week after so that way all the ladies could have gone to the Hamptons and enjoyed themselves. Oh, yeah, because that's like a lot of the bitterness is coming from that they have to do that on their holiday weekend except for Heather because she used to be a Tom Orange girl with Scrapes. I mean, she is tough. Oh, yeah, you guys. She's still not putting cheese on the end of words, you guys. She's totally street. Yeah. Toad Street. So what else is happening on this show, Ben? I don't remember. Just Aviva being crazy. And then I love that there was a scene with Aviva and Reed. This totally set up scene where she's like opens with her and her stupid inhaler. She's like. Yeah. And it looks like somebody who's never smoked a cigarette before, you know, like that really awkward inhale is totally Aviva in that scene. But whenever I smoke cigarettes, which is like once every four months, I have like one cigarette. That's how I smoke a cigarette like it. Like it's a joint, but that whole scene was so ridiculous because she's like, ah, I want to go to this trip. I want to show people how much fun I have and this I just, I want this so badly, but I just want to get an objective perspective from someone who loves me, which by the way, that's not an objective perspective. That's actually the definition of a biased perspective, but she's like, I just want to get an objective perspective. Am I, am I playing this down because, you know, sometimes I play things down, like the time I thought I had the flu and I had legionnaires, I'm like, shut up Aviva. You know that you coughed once and you don't want to go to this trip. It's like it reminds me of when I was a kid and my, my dad made me to mow the lawn every week and I hated mowing the lawn. And if the moment I heard a tiny little clank, if I ran over a pebble or something like that, I'd go running in and be like, dad, the lawn mower is broken. It's like something's wrong, we got to take it to the shop. Like give it, give someone an inch when they don't want to do something, give someone an inch and they will take a lot, you know, and I say that you're not allowed to go yet. But I'll die, what if I die? I mean, I really want to go, I want to spend time with the girls, especially Ramona and Sonia, but you know, I mean, I could die. I mean, that's the down part is that I could die, but I really want to go because it's important to my friendships and my position on this show. So as an objective opinion giver, what would you say? Should I kill myself and die and be dead or should I go on a trip or should I stay here amongst the yellow wallpaper and read for my inhaler? Yeah, or should I do stump paintings? The doctor was probably like, Hey, you know, you may, you might be an asthmatic, I wouldn't recommend going, especially there's a lot of activity because it might agitate it. But you know, you know, do what you want to do. And she probably was like, okay, I, my lungs are falling apart. I've got pulmonary disease, I, you know, I've got lung cancer now. It's like she, she, I think she heard the worst part of what the doctor said and ran with it. So what do you think her deal is? I mean, she's obviously a fame whore because she's a housewife. So why is she always skipping trips and screwing herself out of camera time? Do you think that that? Do you think in her mind that she's going to get like her own camera time? Like she's going to have her own storylines while the girls are gone and she's going to take this to try and get her own spin off or what? I don't, I don't really get it. I think that she, I don't know, I think she, she wants to be in the show, but she wants to do her own thing. And that's just not part of the deal. She's got a play ball. Yeah. Well, she's done. She's probably going to be off the opening credits for the next couple of weeks too. Yeah. This is fun. Yeah. So she's going to be fired. So here's the big thing about this show. It's doing really, really bad. Yeah. I'm so sad about this. It's really, really, really, and I've, and I've hated this episode, but in general I've really been enjoying this season. Yeah. What the hell? What do you think's going on? Do you think that? I mean, I personally think that it's just too much housewives at one time. Like you can call married to medicine and ladies of London, whatever you want. But I mean, this is why we had, I had to cut one out, basically. Well, here's kind of my fault. I can only take so much. Well, here are some of my theories. One is that before New York came on the housewife, well, the housewife nights are these days there on Sundays and Mondays. Okay. And Tuesday night. Okay. It's okay. So for the past, the past few, several months, maybe even a year, Tuesday night has not really been a housewife night. I mean, it changes their time when I think the show is on Thursday or Beverly Hills on Thursday. Bravo's always changing it up. But we've gotten into the mindset that Tuesday night is like not housewives night. So first of all, I think there's a viewer pattern thing. You have to bring people back to Tuesdays for housewives. So that's one thing. Second of all, there was a huge gap between the season and last season. And last season, the first half of it was not great. It kind of like it took a while to gel because Bravo, I think, was way too hasty firing way too many people at once. The second half of last season, did gel came together. And the evidence is now in that this season, this season is awesome. But what happens is that there are a lot of people who watch shows and they see that it's not gelling and they just sign off and they just don't come back and they don't want to come back. They are firm in their belief that, you know, it sucks. And no matter how much you tell them, it's awesome. They just don't want to. They don't want to hear it. Yeah. You know, people are busy and they don't have a lot of time for shows. And once they've signed off on a show, it's very hard to get them back. And I think Bravo really screwed themselves by firing so many people all at once. Too many housewives, my answer is much simpler. Well, no, it's probably that too. It's probably that too. But I think that's really one of them. I think it's a lot of different things. And it's a shame because it's been a really good season. And I noticed that last night, Bravo switched time slot. They had with people's couch. And they had people's couch leaded off. People's couch must be doing well because it's gone from half an hour to a full hour. And now they're using that to kick off the night. So I feel like that's awesome. Yeah, it's doing really well. It is doing well. I haven't watched it in a while because, I mean, again, I explain my issues with it, which is that it doesn't come from any bitterness of the fact that we were not cast. It's more that I just, I find it to be very staged. And it's like, it's just not funny to me that basically. Yeah, you have to watch a lot of the shows that they do too to think it's funny. Yeah. I guess so. I like it. I think it's really a cute show. And I think that that's crazy that they're leading off with that now. That means it's doing really well. It's doing well. And they're trying to use it to bolster New York City. I don't know. It really is frustrating when you see this sort of thing happen. When you know that there's a good product out there and you know that the audience that was once into the Real Housewives, you know that it's like, "Come on back. Come on back. Support this show. It's so good now." And unfortunately, they're just not there anymore. And it's, I think at the end of the day, it's bravo's fault. You know, people also don't take well to change. And they don't take well to a whole cast being overhauled, especially when you have like big figures. As much as we talk about how we hate Jill Zaren, she was very-- Oh. Listen, she was sort of like synonymous with New York. Real Housewives of New York. Oh. Grove. Rose. I mean, I think-- look, I think that it was a very wise decision to get rid of her. I don't think that any of the problems have to do with getting rid of Alex, who was awful. I think that the firings were good. I think that the recasting was bad. I mean, they got people who wouldn't-- who don't even make sense. Carol isn't a housewife at all, like anywhere near, so I don't know what that's about. Heather is one of the most boring people of all time, and she's not really a bitchy caddy person. I mean, I just don't know where they're getting these ideas for these new women. I mean-- Well, mine is Looney Tunes, Sonya is Looney Tunes, Luann is completely delusional and full of herself. I mean, I would think that they would keep casting crazy people, but they seem to get kind of normal people, which-- Well, no, I mean, Heather, though, I don't know, I don't know if I agree with you on that, because I think Heather has shown a lot of feistiness, actually. And I think Carol has idiots, because she's a normal person, but she's not like Looney. But we don't need all Looney's. She's feisty, and Carol is very funny, and-- who else was-- and Aviva, as much as we hated Aviva, she really did add a spark, especially last season. I think the issue is that when the season started last year, there just was no chemistry, and it was just-- it just felt weird, and nothing was honestly for the first half of the show, nothing was really happening. So it just-- you know, they stumbled out of the gate with a new cast, and that's very dangerous. And then on top of that, they had way too long of a time passed before in-between seasons. And then, as you said, there's also a lot of competing stuff that's on TV. So I think that's why the ratings are down. But honestly, if you're listening to this podcast but you stop watching the show, start watching the show again and save it, because otherwise, they're going to recast it with just terrible people. Well, it's-- I mean, the rumors are that they're going to cast it with a bunch of, like, minority women, which I think would be great, because it would be kind of what they were trying to do anyway with that last year we will. Yeah. Oh. I don't know. We'll see. It seems like they're going to try and do that with New York. At least those were the rumors, and hey, go for it. Who knows? Yeah. Okay, next. Why don't we go to-- I'm bored with our conversation. I know. We're getting very analytical. Yeah. People of, I think, the smart way to recast, which is to just do, like, one or two here or there. Or, I mean, I guess they actually, I think, cut a bunch of people last season. But if you're going to cut, like, three, you replace it just, like, with one or two. And then, like, ease us in, because, for instance, Shannon has been fantastic. Shannon, this season-- Shannon has made the season. Orange County is so good this season. 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I don't know, she brings something different than what a young nothing can bring, and the stuff that she's going through is I find very, very, very relatable. You know, this episode, she received an email from her husband saying that he wanted to move out. And it was like, when she announced that, we could all see this coming, because she's just been bitching at them all season, and there's so much tension between them. But when she said it, I actually felt really bad for her. Okay, well, now that you've said that you feel bad for her, let me bring up some Shannon discussion. Yes. Okay, one thing is, before this season started, Tamara was blabbing, you know, leaking shit to radar online or whoever as Tamara is going to do. And a bunch of the stories that came out pre-season were about the new girl, and how she's completely ruining her own family just for camera time, and using, you know, she's the lowest of the low in Tamara's eyes, because she's willing to sacrifice her own family for screen time, basically. So I assumed she was talking about Lizzie, this new bimbo fucking moron, which we'll talk about more later, I guess. But I assumed she was talking about her, because A, she's a bimbo moron, and that's where I expect this, that kind of behavior to come from. And she has no storyline, so I figured that that would be it in the future. But now that we're seeing kind of what's starting to happen with Tamara and Shannon, I'm starting to think she's talking about Shannon, and I'm loving that it's turning this way, because Shannon, I mean Tamara has met her match, Shannon will take the bitch down, and Heather will take the bitch down too, like between the two of them, Tamara can't even form a sentence, so this is a first season that Tamara's ever been confronted with an adversary, because normally she just yells the lot of some wins. The only thing working in Tamara's favor is that Heather and Shannon hate each other, so they won't join forces and take down Tamara. And by the way, I actually don't see any indications so far that Shannon is doing what she can, and she's destroying her family for camera time. To me it looks like she's just existing, you know, like I would think Tamara, Tamara is the one who, you know, has destroyed her family. Well, I don't know, I mean, well yes, I mean I agree obviously Tamara, but um, Shannon, I don't know how calculated it is, I mean, you have to know when you're coming onto a house-wise show, you have to bring a certain amount of drama, and bringing on marital drama is pretty risky, I mean, she would have watched the seasons, she would have known that there was going to be cameras there, her and her husband must have had some kind of discussion about that, like to me it's completely plausible that it's just being put on, but there was an article that came out this week also from some gossip brag, sorry I forgot which one, sorry out there, but um, it was talking about how Shannon, and then, you know, like 10 years ago or something or longer, called the police on David for abuse and he was arrested for physical abuse, but now she's saying oh that was no big deal, we just got in a fight and I thought it would end if I called the police, but he didn't beat me, there was nothing physical, but that's what he was arrested for was for abusing her, so it's pretty interesting, obviously they've been a super dramatic couple for a long time, and they're probably like the bickersons who like fight a lot and then go fuck like rabbit somewhere and they're perfectly happy just arguing, but I don't know, I mean it does make me wonder, it makes me wonder why she chose to come on the show, I'm saying this more from like a rhetorical standpoint because obviously you can know fame, money, etc, but it makes me wonder she doesn't have any products that she's trying to hawk, she doesn't have a brand that she's trying to build, she's just there, you know, and it does make me wonder why would you, knowing that your marriage is already kind of troubled, why would you go on to a show that has such a history of finding the cracks and seams and ripping them wide open, you know, that does make, I do question that, but at the same time when Tamara goes and tells the press, Shannon does this, you know she, she has ripped apart her family for the show, I'm like shut the fuck up Tamara, you have no like to stand on, it's one thing for us to say that, but Tamara you can't go saying that as if you have brought your family together through this show, you know, you're in a situation where your family, your kids like aren't allowed to be on camera and they hate you and they say that they live in poverty when they're with you, so don't, you're not allowed to talk about Shannon in that way, yeah, well I'm liking saying, I agree that Shannon is pretty much the season, I like it, yeah, I mean I think, you know, when I say that she's relatable, the way she is described how things have been with David, I find to be very self-aware, you know, she says how she gets unhappy and then she bitches at him and so she knows that she's bitching at him and then he gets unhappy and then she bitches at him more and so she's aware of this and she even said like why can't I do, like why don't I just wake up early with him and go sleep early with him, why don't I get on his clock, why don't I, so she's like aware of these things that she's doing and yet she can't stop herself and I find that to be a very human thing, you know, which is why I think I like her so much, yeah I mean she takes her, she's one of those people who takes responsibility without taking responsibility, she'll be like well, I know I'm not the easiest person to come home to when I'm miserable but I'm miserable because he doesn't pay enough attention to me so it's his fault that I'm not, you know, it's like no, you're a naggy bitch, stopping a naggy bitch and he might come home and probably won't try and go to bed as soon as humanly possible so that he can avoid his life because that's pretty much why people sleep all day and by the way I sleep like 14 hours a day, so I speak from experience, I drive the cars I sell, guys, meanwhile she's pouring giant pint glasses of vodka to deal with the situation which is also hilarious, I do that too, so I'm basically both of them in one person, so now we have to pause the Shannon discussion for a moment because before we can get to the next vital piece of the Shannon discussion we have to actually go to the Tamara Heather situation because that informs the Shannon situation believe it or not, so the big, the other big story is that Tamara's confidence was finally getting to be on Good Day LA today which is, I mean, on this episode and she and Heather had not talked before the show and then she shows up, Heather doesn't even go say hi to her in the dressing room which I find actually, I think that's actually Heather got revenge, I don't care what anybody says, Heather totally knew what she was doing, she did it on purpose, Heather is one of the most manipulative cold bitches ever and that's what I like about her, I like when they use that part of Heather because that shit was hilarious and she gave her exactly what the bitch deserved, exactly, you know, it's funny with Heather because we have people on our Facebook page, which by the way, facebook.com/watchwalkraphens who are very fired up, but there's one guy on there who says, you know, your hatred of Heather is like, it's almost like pathological, he says this and then another person was like, if you stand up for Heather one more time, I am going to like send you to Shut Up Mountain, so people are fired up and by the way, projecting all of it onto us I think, you know, but they are like, stop standing up for her, you should stand up for her, what do you want us to say? I am looking to see who is calling us pathological, that was Curtis, oh yeah he likes Heather, I just think Heather is a cold, mean, selfish, narcissistic bitch, like I don't see really anything redeeming, she talks to everybody like they are a 3 year old maid, like I don't know which is worse treating them like they are serving or that they are a baby, but she does work at the same time, specifically she acts like the receptionist from Don't Tell Mom the babysitter is dead, and if you don't believe me, go to our Facebook page because we posted a video clip of the receptionists and she speaks exactly like Heather Dubrow, it was scary, she just looks at people with really wide eyes and talks to them like their children, is this how you want me to talk to you, if you want me to talk to you like an adult, you can act like an adult, I thought you would call me, but that's not what you wanted to do in that situation, okay, I don't see how I am responsible for you, I think as a human being, she is the worst, she's a total fame whore, bad actress, bad everything, I just don't like her, I don't like her as a person, I love that, I think she's totally right in this situation, I love that she's throwing it in Tamara's face, here's a thing, there's a lot of right and wrongs going on, I think Tamara was totally ungrateful and ridiculous when she complained when Heather gave her this great opportunity, I think Tamara was wrong, I think that Heather got her revenge by not speaking to Tamara beforehand and kind of like undermining her segment a little bit, but in the grand scheme of life of like being nice to people, Heather was technically wrong in that situation even though in the spirit of karma she was right, if that makes sense, but in general I find that Heather is cold and she's in cable of seeing her flaws, she thinks she is, she's like I know I'm a motor mouth, I'm like that's not your biggest issue, okay, yeah no one's saying you're a motor mouth, we're saying you're a cunt, okay that's like a difference, you know it's like what, where are you getting motor mouth, who said bad, you're a total bitch, okay you're a horrible human being, that's what we're saying, yeah I mean I'm too smart for my own good and I'll say words that you don't understand because my intelligence is greater than yours and I'm sorry you're so stupid you know, well it was funny when Vicki was having a heart to heart with Heather and Vicki, it was like I surprisingly I thought almost mature moment from Vicki and what Vicki was saying like listen I was talking behind her back and I'm sorry I don't want to be that person and she was saying you know sometimes I feel like you're above me and Heather's like why would you say that and you know do you think it's because of like the financial things whatever and Vicki's like yeah you know I don't have the extra O or whatever and Heather's like oh I don't care about that, I have friends from all sorts of walks of life, meanwhile it caught to her bragging about how she has the only carport in her neighborhood, it's like she can't be both Heather either snob and embrace it and we would actually love you for that or don't be a snob but don't act like you're of the people. Yeah and also Vicki wasn't saying I feel like I'm below you, she was saying I feel like you feel like I'm below yes it was a huge difference and Heather didn't take it that way she took it like oh Vicki look here Vicki I think you're a real smart gal you've got your own business you work you got that cute business of yours yeah you go to work you smile you know I mean you don't have to be rich as me to have a smile and you prove it you know look at you smiling good for you gosh poor people and their smiles gosh you see it's the world you can go to Africa where they're eating nuts out of bags that we drop out of the sky and guess who's happier no one I mean those kids have flies on their faces you'd think they were pets I mean those are adorable people go I just wish I could hug Africa stupid bitch she is so offensive on every level especially for someone who didn't earn shit that's what kills me hello she was on Malibu country oh so the thing is okay so um so Tamara's all rattled and you know after her after her by the way perfectly fine segment the fact that she was on good day la is all that really matters okay and she was like I just felt like I didn't get my talking points in above blah blah blah I'm like you know what they're called they're talking points for a reason which means you should have talked about them you know that's your fault actually it's not Heather's fault but then um you know then afterwards she was just you can see she was just trying to start drama and even Eddie was like whatever so she finally has lunch with Heather okay and they hashed out and then what what really comes down to what Tamara says that she's really upset about is that that time at Shannon's first party when Heather went up to Eddie and was like so I hear that Tamara wants to have another baby and you don't want one which was by the way a really obnoxious Heather moment right remember that it was but that was also in retaliation to hearing Tamara talking shit about her behind exactly so this is what Tamara always does in every single fight when she can't win a fight she starts crying and she starts acting like she's the victim the whole time it's like no one has victimized you not job you are such a bitch like no one has done anything like you've done to them this girl has not talked about you badly she is not gone behind your back and told everyone at a party would have stuck up bitch you are she hasn't done any of the stuff that you've done but now you're the one crying exactly but then so here's where we come back to Shannon's so so Tamara says listen all I ask is that like you know if I share something in confidence with you that you wouldn't ghost or telling people and Heather's like okay and Tamara's like so anyway Shannon shared with me an email that David's leaving her the first thing she does is gossip about Shannon's marriage falling apart that was super cold okay so then we see the previews for next week when it goes bad between Shannon and Tamara and Allison you're real shitty Shannon and Tamara you like my English sorry guys Shannon and Tamara um but of course Shannon's ridiculous because she's already told us and everybody in America I guess but I mean I guess it's still hurts that she's been costed about by Tamara to her enemy you know so I can see that but oh I can't wait it's gonna hit the fan and Tamara totally lies about it she's like she did not hear that from me I did not say a word to clarify because in your excitement I don't know if you actually said what happened what in the preview Shannon gets a text while she's with Tamara a text from a friend saying Heather Dubrow is talking about the email that you received from David and then Shannon's like oh Tamara did you send that to did you tell Heather Dubrow about that and Tamara's like I could not say a thing oh my god now it's all apart and now it's all gonna fall apart I mean it's it's great and what I actually but but again what I really like is that this isn't just some stupid to kind of you know stupid thing about an exercise DVD like it was my donkey booty DVD this is about like real friction between people that's like very relatable and that stems over real things and in this case that there's also like you know maybe perhaps divorce in the mix I love it yeah and Tamara has really stepped in it on all fronts he's got Heather now who's never gonna forgive her because if one if we've learned one thing about Heather it's that she never lets anything go yeah not a thing so Heather is going to be passive aggressive and stabbing her in the back any way she can from now on yeah and not only that the most unlikely of alliances is Heather and Vicki like what the fuck is that about they're hanging out now and Vicki is being quiet and like treating Heather with deference which is really we or reverence I guess which is really weird and Heather is telling her well you told me that she would be trainee you told me all this stuff so now they're bonded in their hatred of Tamara even though Vicki's gonna be nice to Tamara but she's screw Vicki once so much we'll forget it either listen Vicki's just happy to be out of the fray like you know Vicki had a very dull storyline it involved balloons coming out of a box it's like yay another ugly baby's on the way and it's gonna be a boy who were so mean for calling that baby ugly and everybody on Facebook was like oh no Ben's right that is one ugly baby thank you I paused it on that baby's face and I was like oh little Richard Nixon maybe Richard Nixon's NASCAR plus no it just looks like Ryan and just says like a baby version of Ryan and I don't know I don't know what reality is and then yeah those those balloons came out of the box and popped and put poison gas everywhere because someone had their feet on the caps like a piece of a little bit future abuser baby so then we had Lizzie um who got Lizzie okay here's Lizzie's storyline um do my can you see my nipples my boobs are so big ever since I was a little girl I've had the biggest boobs are my boobs too big mom can you see my nipples mom what about my nipples oh my god my boobs ah they're so big mom cut herself so the thing is here's the thing I actually don't think that Lizzie's a bimbo but I feel like her storylines are um completely um I can't even think of the right words speaking of bimbos I can't think of the right word there's just no substance I don't think she has a bimbo because she's not like bimbos are you saying I think she's the elevator what the elevator who works it yeah but she's I just find that her storylines lack substance they're not interesting I find her very stupid and a waste of time and she is always tired right now well in the beginning it it seemed like she was going to be good in the beginning because she and Vicki got into it and it was like it was really good and she stood up for herself and was like passive aggressive that's everything you want but now she's just like a mommy sitting around uh watching your kid and by the way also memo to the producers you're doing a terrible job with her green screening during the interviews I mean really really horrific job it's like they did it at a community college or something well Lizzie her um I was gonna say I can't I can't pay attention to anybody who says the word fulfilled first of all and second she's like oh I need to be creative what are you talking about you're going to a fucking beauty competition that is not being miscemented that's what I loved is like having having an even a thing since when is that a thing mrs. Santa Monica Santa Monica USA like that's probably the most embarrassing beauty title that there is that is not even the thing and that girl who invented it she's like oh and we have Miss Malibu and Miss Santa Monica I'm like this girl looks like a you car salesman she has just invented titles to get girls to hand her money and it's apparently not working well enough to get her out of her dress bar and clothes like this I don't trust anything that's happening on this show not a thing I just loved when Miss Santa Monica USA and the runner-up were standing there holding hands waiting to hear the results as if anything mattered at that moment it's like congratulations you're Miss Santa Monica you're back to you know your job at Chuck G's yeah congratulations we're gonna stop the Ferris wheel while you're at the very top and just let people try and hit you with apples I know here's a ten dollar gift certificate to the William Sonoma on Montana Avenue try not to let the moms and yoga pants run you over it's like the music is being played by like a homeless guy in the promenade with a guitar like really badly the after parties can be held at a generic pub sports pub Sunday McLean's watch out watch out for that thousand dollar stroller that's coming down the pike it's gonna run you over wherever they call those baby bugs or something um I also wrote down um do you know why your husband wants to move out because of fights like this weren't you taking up a glass of ice water with you David oh my god yeah gonna drink it here but why won't you take it with you David take it with you take the ice water with you I don't want it honey why David why wouldn't you want it that's why you'll have a glass of cold water for when you sleep you'll have water next to you David you'll wake up and you'll have cold water right next to you David why wouldn't you want that he's like I don't want that David David you're leaving without your ice water David oh he just doesn't hug me enough he doesn't hug me it was like the best Edward Albie play I've ever seen it was like well do you want some cold water for your sleep no I think I'm about to finish this bottle here well but then you won't have cold water David I have two yeah David it wasn't water in the first place it was juices from our dead baby God I wish it would who's afraid of Virginia's wolf it's afraid of Shannon Shannon whatever her last name is poor Shannon David there's water here David David there's water with ice in it here David if you wake up in the middle of the night it'll still be ice cold David take it with you take it David how can you sleep without it David David while you go to sleep at 8 30 I'm going to lower and raise the chandelier five times David I love that she's even turned the kids against him they're like you're an idiot dad yeah I don't know what cotillion is yeah because you're from a small town you don't have any manners idiot so sad like run David run although Vicki did just post on Instagram a picture with her and Brooks and Shannon and David somewhere having fun so I guess that works out okay well that's good there's happiness in the beat or mansion after all we do have to give Heather a little credit today you're welcome Curtis Jensen um we have to give it Heather some credit today for her amazing impression of Shannon yeah that was pretty good when she was she crinkled one eye and kept one open she's like you're twisting things so twisting them around there you go again twisting hey she's an actress after all oh Heather wow what a great actress yeah let me why don't we move on ways to make it better Heather's apology LOL Heather's impression nipples are her storyline her mom cuts herself Shannon's half cry oh poor Shannon's I can see it that's why I can't tell if she's acting or not because her half cry the whole time this isn't I want Shannon this doesn't what I want this is he he emailed me to say that he was leaving I brought her a paragraph said I want to move out free hotmail from hotmail dot com there was a signature at the bottom that felt very impersonal and felt almost like he was automatically added to all his emails and I thought I'm your wife how could you do that why would he put his business logo on an email to his wife I mean that's what I'm talking about I have to beg him to write me an email as his wife and not someone just on his business mailing address why does he send me an email from something called earthlink.net is the net supposed to refer to me trying to capture him is that his way of saying he feels trapped I don't get it I don't like it sent from an iPhone how about sent from a you phone for how about sent from a we phone because it's us I always feel like a discarded model like a iPhone C I don't see anything I just I'm not gonna believe he loves me until there's a you an iPhone all right so real house was in New York we did and now let's go to London ladies of London so good so good so good this episode was having me I was cracking up and I was also on the edge of my seat my bum was on the edge of my seat I must lie in the world where you on the edge of your feet because I then first of all I have a very small seat second of all it was because you just knew there was gonna be a thoroughly polite dust up to quote arrested development it was just like you knew Annabelle was going to lose her shit in a British way and you knew that Juliet was gonna be body and you know it was just gonna head that way he didn't know how and it was just you know I like these shows when people in quote unquote polite society terribly and it makes me very tense but also it gives me great joy well they're also all fame whores which makes me laugh at them thinking that they're so hoity-toity okay one of you is caprice a which we will get to her later because she deserves an entire rant yeah then you've got Caroline who just basically bangs rich people she's hilarious Caroline's great Caroline is my favorite but she's not the highest in society I mean give me a fucking break and then she's got the highest side but she's also but she's also not the lowest but then you've got a woman who can't even get through one scene on the show without mentioning some dead famous friend of hers which is fucking pathetic you know okay has this bitch ever known anybody not famous who have died because you wouldn't know it from the way she well everything's Alexander Alexander like that now he's dead and I'm not leaving the house I was I was his muse I want one morning he woke up and I happened to be walking behind the street and he thought this is great I'm going to design a dress I love it she's like I was his muse because he liked what I stood for I'm a rebel I'm like you get you fucking started crying when underwear were at the table I know we have to talk this is what I have to talk about so on the one hand I love how Annabelle is so ridiculously snobby I love how she is of them all she's the most uptight and she probably is the most aristocratic because we saw her her granny who came by and I love the granny the granny was very stylish by the way she looked like she was 140 years old and had better style than most women I see out here in LA but they talk about oh you know Captain Corelli was the one who ordered a assassination on them bro like this you know crazy family history which is one of those things where it makes you like love the Brits you know because you're like oh this wonderful story and shit oh your father your grandfather was the one who enjoyed horse riding darling he knew barrel eyes barrel eyes girl eyes where'd that come from I think there are of all the people you could have mentioned you would have thought like maybe I don't know you could have even made up someone he knew the the the Duke of the Queen of he knew the Duke of Ives shops sure the Duke of Ives and the Duke of Ives got into a fight one day your father well packed up your grandfather was the inspiration for hallejah Christmas there are so many references you could have made I don't know where it goes what people it's like you have ridiculous answers on family feud name a famous British picture burr lives isn't it British oh right grandfather in 1867 knew someone who would move stateside and then it got your great grandfather was some use of Benny Hill who were doing wonderful wonderful montages to harmonica music your grandfather was there on his horse your great great grandfather Sergeant Basil Rathbone once used someone from Crudgington turf and shropshire who was just chuffed to bits with the cheese that was being imported to wells and so we brought him stateside and there he became and he learned about music and from there he began to enjoy burr lives what lovely sandwiches you know once I was sitting here with the lovely Goldie Hahn and she was asking me why do cucumber sandwiches not have crust and I informed her back in the day we thought it was crust that was giving everyone influenza well it turns out your father discovered it was untrue with the duke of Ives and to this day we call a cucumber sandwich a burr lives on bread i had a burr lives on right one of those jewish delis like a hundred and ten-year-old lady here and still this dumb bitch is like oh well you know I used to know someone who loved sandwiches like this I was his muse and now he's gone so here's the thing you have to worry you have to wonder sometimes at some point you have to stop wondering why and just move on well no but what makes it worse is that she's like well you know I do love to ride but you know if I'm going to ride you know chances are I'll probably be showing up wearing something a little bit punk rock as well you know I'm just a little bit rock and roll I'm like no bitch like you said before Ronnie like you're not rock and roll if you are a gas at the site of underwear at a at a july fourth party yeah she's ridiculous and I would she's like I wouldn't wear the traditional garb I would wear leather leather taps or something I would wear a hat to the polar grounds and not a hat to ask her that's how rocket roll I am yeah she's like she's gonna wear something on a horse that's not what she's supposed to be wearing but it's still something you wear on a horse yeah listen you show them honey you know one of our commenters said this and I agree any time someone calls themselves rock and roll they just aren't rock and roll I mean how many times do we see people get onto American Idol and they're like yeah I'm rock and roll like Constantine Marulus rock and roll rock and roll the very first thing they do is they head to Broadway and yeah it's like how are you how are you in your women's coat for Joseph and the amazing Technicolor dream coat you know I mean have you seen that picture going around because that's coming here again ace that's ace young right it is oh I changed my mind I love you ace young I love you so much she wanted to be kind of rock and roll just there are all these people that say that they're rock and roll and they're just they're so not you know like even that whole show rock star and excess it's like yeah we're gonna be rock stars like it's it's just funny when people want to have that attitude and they just fall so very flat it's like saying you're cool like well you know Alexander I was exactly what Alexander wanted I was exactly the look I'm like yeah because you look at fucking dead like she looks in those modeling pictures like a dead person with a saggy face like he wanted the most depressing fucking if he could have done that outside with everybody waiting in line for cheese you know she's like just sandals and underwear he would have done it she's like zombie Shenandoahty oh my god she totally is she's like Shenandoahty in between 90210 and charmed when she just thought it was over so this being all said as much as I hate how hypocritical that she is she should just be a stuck-up aristocratic bitch and we would love her for it so she's like I can't do this she storms out of this July 4th party that's being thrown because Juliet's kind of getting drunk to be fair Juliet's being really annoying you know yeah let's rewind for a second for those of you who don't want to show okay the lady who looks and talks like Caroline Ray is married to a restaurant to her bar meets face ford meets face ford oh yeah that's a good call someone someone messa die i can't claim it and um uh she has a July 4th party which is totally inappropriate because as we all know July 4th is our independence from england when we told them get the fuck out of here and don't ever call us again and Annabelle and Annabelle very dramatically is like it's just it's sort of like a second civil war i'm like that's real rock star of you yeah exactly i'm like don't you have a declaration of sign bitch so um anyway so it's a completely offensive party so she invites all of these British women who don't even bother you know telling her how and her husband doesn't bother to i mean why does anybody think that this is okay it's not nice right uh i don't i don't think anyone cares this point i mean the only people who care are the aristocratic types aka Annabelle you know if you are from like an old storied family and you know aristocratic you still care about these things i mean haven't you seen down nabi the the you know they they harvard rudges you know you know people don't really give you the americans in their July 4th party so you know the fact that's why it's so funny that annabelle mr punk rock is saying oh it's the second civil war it's her actually being so aristocratic in that moment that i guess it's like on southern charm when uh thomas ravenal is like well the civil war was completely offensive to the south because it killed so many people uh yeah because you guys refuse to give up your fucking slaves that built all your mansions dick yeah come on now but yeah i guess we all have a different way of looking at history for example i hate the 70s because women decide to stop wearing bras and shaving their armpits and i disagree so anyway before we get on to that rant um so there's the july 4th party that's happening and the spackle marissa i think she's co-hosting with yeah julie that's the one from chicago who is like really really mid-western and sometimes she seems really fun and cool and most of the time she's you know there's not there's one thing worse than an american fame horror and it's an american fame horror in england like she is just she's embarrassing original financing to americans here okay she's gross oh wait that was original title to american werewolf in london it's an american fame war in england yeah she's gross so anyway so they decide that they have this party whatever or the cat everyone shows up and so annabelle is talking to there's this new blonde woman who i think is going to become my cast member and they're talking and they're having a very british in inside conversation you know the other woman i think is american and julia it's so annoying she keeps on like interjecting me like yeah well you know what i i love running a elliptical i love taking yoga class i love doing this i love oh because they were talking about horse race she's like you know riding the horse it's so gigantic and powerful you know and when you have something like that i'm doing julia it's like yeah i know sports right yeah tennis oh yeah yeah so all right we were gonna be quiet oh yeah quiet like you're in racquetball i play racquetball too hundreds so and that's when annabelle starts bringing out her real past aggressive british shit where she's like oh i do swear you have to slow down your words that's you know i could barely understand a word you're saying you must slow down and then it's sort of like builds and builds and eventually this girl this lingerie designer shows up and she brings some knickers and uh they're red white and blue and julia's looking at them oh oh i'm sorry before that even julia sings the national anthem because she's goaded on by marissa i think it's fine i mean she sounds terrible but it's like you know it's whatever it's just someone singing at a party i don't know i don't see the big deal what did annabelle say about it she's like the star strangled anthem yeah so um anyway at the eventually this lingerie comes out and annabelle decides it's just this is just the lowest she cannot be seen at this party so she storms out julia then is fewer she thinks that's so rude that she just storms out so julia goes out and then they start fighting in front of the club or in front of the restaurant and that was when i started laughing because julia is like she's just all noise you know i don't even remember what she was saying and annabelle's just like go on go on special needs go on go on i just loved how as much as like i thought that annabelle was being a bitch and how she's being condescending and hypocritical about being a rock star i love the way she handled herself in that argument it's like you can't you can't you can't beat that yeah sometimes people just aren't gonna like you just go don't just don't sit next to them yeah i mean if i was around some stuck-up bitch like that i would just not sit next to her yeah i mean i know that that would kind of put an end to all these shows but i don't understand how this is gonna work if these ladies are too above fighting because that's kind of what this show is and like they're trying to make you guys do it and you're just like above everything like if you're still above everything what are you doing on a reality show a you're not above anything because that's like the bottom and be what are you doing on the show if you're not gonna do anything but sit there and cry about your dead fucking friend cut it out now they're just ridiculous i don't care about any of the americans they're all stupid the only one i'm watching is the american who is a total gold digger because i can't wait to watch her get hers which i have a feeling she oh my god no else she's oh well that's the other thing that was funny i have this whole fight is that caprice was just i mean she couldn't even believe she couldn't well no i couldn't believe it but then caprice couldn't believe it either caprice was you know she just you know she storms that i haven't celebrated july fourth in 14 years and then she's you know storming out because she couldn't believe how ridiculous this all was i mean the whole thing was uh caprice is really caprice's terrible fake accent she's like i just don't see why annabelle would do this suddenly i've never i think annabelle get upset with anything annabelle she bannabelle is so even even killed she would never get upset about any of the thoughts i'm going to leave go go get a fucking rosetta zone oh that's not for accents go to the chamel french bookstore and get yourself an accent tape that says she could still use a rosetta stone to knock herself out with just pop pop yourself over the head show what do you think about it what no it was no it was no i thought last week was like whatever this week i was like yes we were back on i'm loving it yeah i'm getting bored with it they need to amp it up hopefully no well we'll get run over by a car or something and then we'll have to dump her because she's a gimp down and then i think he is going to dump her actually next week i thought she was still together aren't they oh who knows well she'll probably do what she can to get him back yeah oh also someone sent us a really nice email this week saying oh you should read the blogs every week before the podcast because so much of the stuff you've discussed is already resolved in the blogs and i like that i sometimes do read the blogs and thank you for that advice but the thing is not everybody reads the blog so we kind of have to recap what actually happened as well yeah but um i think that's a good idea and i would like to start reading these blogs because you know the ladies of london wimps are really funny absolutely so now why don't we move on to our final show which is real houses of atlanta candy's wedding which was also hilarious this one oh my god this week it was old lady wars yes awesome absolutely the best you talk okay so this week mama tat came in tat hey hey tat i'm at the airport so we're gonna come give it as someone gonna come pick me up tat he's like well mama you know i'm just trying to find sheets for your bed mama you see that all right i'll be there in a minute now i'm joyce gonna be there because that mama joyce i'm telling you right now i'm not gonna take any shit from that woman and i and she did not take any shit from that woman she came right in and gave it right to mama joyce mama joyce's head almost spun off and flew into the other room oh yeah as you know what mama joyce is just a despicable person and i'm glad that finally this woman got a chance to defend herself against all the things that mama joyce has been saying how could you how you be talking about someone like that when he's dead you don't talk about someone like that pimp when he's dead who who told you talk like that about my husband like that's what i heard on the street okay that is what i heard from my people on the street i'm not doing the next Tuesday bitch no you know what i loved actually i love i love first of all i love aunt Nora i love how aunt Nora loves Todd's mom but then birthed up remember there was this thing there were what was birthed's crazy scheme she had she had like the most elaborate like so i guess after Todd's mom ran off they're what was it about Carmen and Todd where and birthed was like i think that maybe Todd was in with a photographer and Carmen and that we were all get through and it just like stood up and i dropped the mic as if it made any sense i wish i could remember what it was about but it was so funny it made it was so out there like the the lengths that these women are willing to go to like and and when they are faced with pure fact that Todd is more or less a decent guy and his mom's more or less a decent woman how they will still look for the craziest possible explanation for why they're terrible people yeah because they have a pimp and a hoe well i don't even remember this whole fight and you know actually kind of shame on us because this was like the best fight ever and i should have transcribed the whole thing but while i was watching and i was like there's no way i'm gonna forget anything that happened right now that's exactly what i was thinking i guess i forgot everything well basically all that happened i do remember the best part though was when um uh Todd's mom started yelling back at stupid twat Joyce and uh Joyce started waving her finger in her face and she's like you got the wrong bitch now and started grabbing her finger and then they decided their kids were like you guys need to make up blah blah blah so they come back together and then mama Joyce is like you wave your finger at me you wave your finger at me and call me a bitch and i wave my finger back at you and call you a bitch and that was just two bitches waving their finger at him well you know here's what drives me nuts about mama Joyce okay she well she starts stirring the pot because uh she starts talking about how she's not allowed to sleep over at the house okay and the implication is that the mama Todd gets to have preferential treatment right and so then finally mama Todd whatever her name is she decides she's not gonna stand for this implication anymore and she's like well i hope you're not saying like that i'm getting preferable treatment or something to that effect and then they start to fight and so as they start to fight Todd's mom is like shut up bitch and then Joyce then grabs on to that and like she called me a bitch she called me a bitch and then like the whole rest of the the night it was like well i don't know it's that woman called me a bitch and i hate that that's like it's like you bait someone that finally like say one thing so i mean that's so learned from housewives too and that's exactly like a camera move too it's like you poke you poke you poke you poke in the second they say something bad you're like bully you don't tend yeah i can you more or two but don't forget oh yeah um but yeah that was hilarious and that was actually one example of candy actually kind of standing up for herself when mama Joyce was like well congratulations i don't even get to stay in the house you know candy's like where mama now we have a whole new house for you mama so while you were saying that like you could have been on the house mama with rider you don't mama you don't behave mama you talk about Todd mama you're so far too tired mama and she's like wait i don't do nothing she's like yeah it's because you don't respect my son why my son spent time with you you don't respect my son who who you think you are coming into his house not respect my son and then she's like well your son let me tell you about your son sleeping with hookers at parties i had a photographer it's like you set my son up i did not set him up like how how are you gonna argue that you weren't trying to set Todd up i know see no mama what well you guys see that mama see you know rider who can't play it and get out of here because mama's gonna get all crazy like see no i'm gonna hash that with mom at least just like i will be in my room now good night everybody by the way there is another uh fight because there's this like middling drama that no one cares about between tan and carmen and uh they got into a fight when all the bridesmaids got together and tan tried to sign things and then carmen was drinking and the next thing you know wheezy was or weenie was like i will not have you with this wedding it's like what is going on here and by the way the most important takeaway from that entire scene was that that bar the bar stools were not stools but they were swings and i was like this is another reason was that yeah they were seeing there in swings i'm like this is another reason why i can't take Atlanta seriously because every time i see Atlanta it's just like idiots on screen doing stupid things in places that are trying to be cool and trendy but just look like they're trying too hard and just bougie yeah um i think the biggest thing to take away from that scene is that there's a woman in the world named weenie and a woman named tan probably short for tanya um so what else happened on this show i hope that mama tod sticks around and beat the shit out of mama joyce because mama joyce deserves it mm-hmm and that's my hope for this show yeah anything else that's it finish it let's finish it should we be done with this finish here finish with this so finish here um thank you everybody so much for being here and listening for another week on watch what crappins you can find us on facebook.com at facebook.com slash watch what crappins on twitter at what crappins you can find me ronnie carram at my website trash.tv.com where there's a bunch of writers writing comedic recals for tv shows you can also find us on trash tweet tv or on youtube at trash talk tv t-e-e-b-e-e you can find my personal stuff at ronnie carram on twitter and instagram you can find benjamin mandelker on his blog beside blog.com or on all social media outlets at beside blog twitter instagram do only go and bind do only go secret you'll just have to search him yeah and i think that's it we'd love you guys very much come to our facebook page talk to us let us know if you have any suggestions do you want us to talk about some shows we're not going to add any shows on the rotation right now because we've got too many but we will maybe do some one-offs if you guys want and talk about some other stuff on broadly you're watching okay okay everybody bye. bye. if you like listening to comedy try watching it on the internet the folks behind the side show network have launched a new youtube channel called wait for it it's got interviews with comedians like reggie wats taught glass flies a slice finger slicing dragon friends with it for 10 years one of the funniest people out there and i still have a hard time with the last name liza our very own own benjamin that's me takes you on a musical journey down internet rabbit holes and much more you don't have to wait any longer just go to youtube.com slash wait for it comedy there's no need to wait for it anymore because it's here and it's funny and i love you on monday josh live argar meet his status piece of a mone's followed by a frowny face it got one like and five comments including dislike well josh geico also wants to make a comment to turn that emojis frown upside down in just 15 minutes you could save hundreds of dollars on your car insurance by switching to geico with all that extra dough why not give monday a makeover we see an office party in your future 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