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Hey everyone, welcome to Watch More Crapids. The podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we love to watch. I'm Ben Mandelker from bsideblog.com. You can find me on Twitter and Instagram and Vine and Pinterest and wherever else @bsideblog all one word. Joining me as always is my beautiful co-host, Mr. Ronny Karam, hi Ronny, so nice to hear your dulce, the dulce tones of your voice, of your Lebanese voice, @TrashTalkTV on Twitter and also as a website called TrashTalkTV.com that you all should go to every single day of your life. If you all came there 10 times a day and clicked on an ad, I wouldn't even have to do this show. I know, I know, then it would just be Ben Roland solo. Although we also have a special guest today, joining us as well is the Inimitable Lisa Timmons. Welcome back Lisa. Oh my gosh guys, it has been so long, I've missed you two gentlemen and I'm very excited. I've missed you two. You've been freaking Atlanta, we've been trying to get you on this show for months. I've been in Savannah this year, but you're right, I've been in Georgia, so I'm back, we are on the same time zone, things are just as they should be. Well, they're not quite as they should be because we actually have some news regarding this podcast. The past few weeks, our dearest Matt Woodfield has not been on the show because he has just had a very rigorous work schedule, especially in the fall, Yahoo Entertainment, they get swamped with award stuff and movie premieres and things like that. It has become too overwhelming, so unfortunately Matt has actually stepped down from the podcast. He's going to be like Camille Grammar, he's not gone, but he'll still come on, whenever we can get him on. I don't know, you know what, he said that in the email, he's like, I'm going to have to pull a Camille and just be a friend of the housewives, but you know what, Camille is no longer on that show, so he's actually gone now. So I can read between the lines Matthew, I hope that you die quickly, I hope that you don't die like a horrible violent death, but you will die. Yeah, we love Matt and he was very stressed about having to do this and having to like step down. I know I know Wade heavily on him and there's no hard feelings whatsoever, and he's always worried he's another person who got skinny and wouldn't be my friend anymore. We're Matt is and when Matt's going to come back, well that's where Matt is and we don't know when Matt's going to come back, but in the meantime, this is sort of fun because we can sort of, you know, approach this like the view or like Justin Kelly, you know, we got this, we have a rotating guest seat now and maybe one of these days we'll find a permanent addition. Wow, this is super awkward because I totally thought that that's what this was. Yeah, so one off, no, just kidding. Guys, this is the first time I'm hearing that I am not his permanent replacement. I was totally lying, everything's fine. Yeah, you should, I think you should be the Rosie O'Donnell where you come in and then you do a really good job, but then you leave because we didn't support you when you went on Fox. That is pretty much the story in my life. Well, we need to find you in enemies, that way you and the enemy could have like split screen fights about, you know, politics, you know, Rosie O'Donnell's with Hasselbeck. Yeah, yeah, or, or Donald Trump, whatever, just get all the former members of the view and put them on Watch for Crapins. That would be good. Talking to them, talking about the housewives, they're a hundred percent available, I'm not even looking that up. I'm going to guarantee that. All right. An uplift isn't booked for the next six months. Man, the view has changed so much. I don't even know what it is anymore. So many people and I'm like, yeah, I have no interest in knowing what Jenny McCarthy thinks about anything. Yeah, especially vaccines. Anyway, we should get to Bravo stuff as much as we love to talk about ourselves and we do this at the beginning of every podcast. We should talk about Bravo. Do we have any gossip? Do we have any gossip this week? I feel like there was something, right? Um, I think Kim's also pregnant with twins. Oh, yeah. Big shocker there. It's basically like, like a giant burrito from cilantro or what's that place? It could be in cilantro, whatever. Cilantro. I don't think. I don't think it's wins. Just because it's a double cheeseburger does not make it a twin. She has a double wapper with cheese. It's like a big gold. She pops. I'm sure. Hurt. I think we've lost. I think we've lost you, Lisa. You were making a very funny point. I'm a back. Am I back? Yeah, you're back. I said I'm pretty confident she pops fertility pills like multivitamin. Yeah. And I think if I was ever having sex, I've always said this. So guys, this is not new or controversial. If I'm ever having sex with a professional athlete, you know I'm not on birth control. My ass is trying to get right now. Yeah, absolutely. You're locking it down. You know, even if it means that your vagina is going to look like a waterslide from Harking Harbor. It already does. Okay. Well, if I ever sleep with a professional athlete, I'm going to seal his sperm and inject you with it while you're taking a nap so you could get pregnant with my baby. Guys, that's a good friend right there. A good friend. None of us will ever work again except for Ben. We can hire Ben to like take care of the kid. That's perfect. I've seen him in action. He's great. That's me. So another gossip thing, Josh wearing the son of Lori wearing is a stranger to crime. He's been busted at least five times. As for the most recent, we found out that he was popped on October 10th for allegedly stealing a 2005 cat and that he was charged today. Oh, God. Oh my God. I used Cadillac. That's so sad. That is so sad. Like, why don't you just go steal one of those little zip cars that are parked on the fucking street with keys left in the wheelchair. But basically he's raiding retirement homes for their vehicles. That's what I mean. That's what I'm hearing here. You want to impress me? You figure out how to steal a Prius where all you have to do is press the button to turn it on. And you get a silent getaway. Yeah, that's a say. It'd be the easiest. Okay. We're like running behind him. We're gonna ship you. What's that? Cargo. It's so quiet. We're touching your bumper right now. Just pull over. I'll have a smoke mask. Here's something. We've already started to see some promos for this on Bravo, but Rihanna and Rihanna has a show that's going to be on Bravo called Style to Rock. And I think it's not just Rihanna. There's someone else who's involved with it, someone big and legitimate. But the show is going to be on Fridays, which to me seems a little strange for Bravo. What do you guys think about that? And what do you guys think about this? Oh, have you heard about it? I've seen promos before. I thought it was just on a different network for some reason. I thought that was going to be on Oxygen. No. Oxygen is gone now, isn't it? No. Oxygen, I think it still exists. Oxygen is still on. How dare you? How dare you? Oh, I was thinking of style networks. Style network. Style network has been absorbed. Yeah. What are my networks? Oh, no. What happened to Michelle? Wasn't she working at style? Oh, that show's long gone. Oh. Yeah. We hate that show now. Okay. Screw that show. Screw you. Style network. I hope you're enjoying Matt Whitfield as your president of your dead company. Just kidding. I'm missing Matt. Come home. Why does it keep getting quiet? And Pharrell is going to watch the shit out of Rihanna show. Yeah. And Pharrell's going to be a mentor. And guest judges include Miley Cyrus, Khloe Kardashian, Nia Rivera, Neo and Kelly Osborne. I don't know how Nia Rivera got bigger billing than Neo, but that's the way the world is. These are big names. These are big names. It's basically class. Yeah. Those are basically class. That show. I mean, I don't even know who Nia Rivera is. Is she on Glee or something? She married? Yes. Is she married? It's on. She's on Glee. She's the one who's kissing to me, Lovato. Yeah. This is not doing much for me. But the point is this. These are big names and the show's going to be on Friday nights on Bravo. That seems almost like they're burying it. Don't you feel like this is a show that should be on a Sunday night or a Tuesday night? Well, Sunday's taken. I mean, do we just know we're on Sunday for anything? First of all, you start the day with Jesus and then you come home and you've got eight fucking hours. I've got eight hours of TV to watch on a Sunday. There will be nothing else. I think Bravo's just like, well, hopefully black people are going out only on Saturday. I don't know what they're saying. Why it would be on Friday? I don't know. That's a big black night. I don't think so. And I hope they're not burying Rihanna because I think that's going to be a really big show. Yeah. I love her. I love her Instagram. Do you follow her on Instagram? No. She's hysterical. She posts pictures. She posts pictures all the time and they're always ridiculous. My favorite one so far is she's like mad dogging this penguin and she's wearing a black white outfit. And the caption is, "Bitch, don't I look?" What does it mean to mad dog someone? That sounds sexual. Mad dog. It's like giving them the side eye. You know what? That might be a southern thing. Yeah. I just realized that. Yeah. You're just back from Savannah. So you're going to be saying things like, "I'm fixing to, for weeks." You know what? I might could explain that to you, but it would take a few seconds. Exactly. Literally, when I saw this earlier this week, she had a bucket full of crawfish and a banjo and she had a piece of, she had a read in her mouth. She'd joke, but he's actually seeing me with a bag of crawfish. Yeah. Actually, Ron and I got crawfish at that same place. Guys, the three of us should get crawfish. Tonight, let's do it. Okay. Bye. Podcast over. I love you. Vegan. Bye. They're basically about creatures. It's basically like being vegan this month. I care about creatures today until I cheat on my diet and then I'll give up the whole rain forest for an M&M. I'll be like, "Bye, everybody. Give those cows as many hormones as they need. Just get me a cheese that has peanut M&M." The cow should not have to experience menopause. This is not on the topic of bravo, but we will somehow find it to get in there. But I had a pretzel M&M this weekend. Delicious. No, I felt like it tasted dusty. I felt like it did not live up to the hype. Oh, it's so good. You have to eat it with almond M&M's or peanut M&M's. You can't just have pretzels or it's good if you have just pretzels with those other M&M's. You mean pretzel M&M's with those M&M's? No, pretzels with peanut M&M's. I know what you're saying. Absolute pretzels with peanut M&M's. Yes. Yeah. Because it's the same effect in your mouth. Oh, yes. Absolutely. Because I'm telling you, I had the pretzel M&M brand, where it was like a pretzel inside the M&M. And it tasted like very dusty. It tasted, it reminded me of Carol Radzewell, okay? And I didn't want that. You don't want that. See you up right back to bravo. I'm a green M&M because I'm horny. Where does it need to get laid to? I've made the same. 99%? The famous M&M died in a plane crash, but I don't want to say his name. I have Voldemort, my ex-husband. He loves M&M's. He's the M&M of the month. This isn't really an M&M thing, but this was a bravo thing that happened with my temporary veganism the other day because I was watching this movie on Netflix because I don't have a job right now. So anybody who wants to hire me to do something where you can give me a lot of money, where I don't have to do much, please email me. But I was watching this thing on Netflix about veganism and it was like making you feel guilty about what we do to the animals and stuff. And it was talking about how they have to keep getting cows pregnant over and over again and naturally so that they can keep producing milk for ice cream and stuff. And I was like, that's what Kim Zilciak is saying. I was about to say Kim Zilciak will be coming out with her own ice cream soon. And the pie will have a little wig on it. It'll taste like thick fillet. It'll taste like one thing until candy comes through and makes it taste like something better in the middle of you eating it. Exactly. Candy coated ice cream. What are you doing? I'm not being small. So you're picking up a gosh. Scramrale. Hey, hey, hey, hey, it's me, Candy Bursts. See, I brought a Scramrale to eat her ice cream because it's made of candy bursts. I'm going to make a Scramrale ice cream from my cake balls. Oh, we forgot to announce something very important, you guys. What is that? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Lots of spooky things will be happening today. It's a haunted podcast. Well, I get the first spooky thing. I was haunted by the ghost of Real Housewives of New York City past when I turned on my DVR last night and I found the series premiere of The Real Housewives of New York back from 2008 recorded right there for me. Oh, my God. What was that like? It was amazing. You know what? Let me tell you something, people. Tell me. See this cast in their infancy before Jules, well, back when we liked Jules Aaron before she was awful back when we didn't know who these characters were when when Alex McCord was just totally ridiculous. It was, I felt like my heart was racing. It was so exciting to see this. It was brilliant. If you guys have it on your DVR, watch it. You might have it there. Like I did. They all had different noses. We were doing something different where they were showing full seasons this whole weekend. They were showing an old Jersey season and I was trying to record the final episodes of Million Dollar Listing to see how that all played out and I accidentally recorded the wrong season of it and I was like, I have already seen this terrible end of the first time. Jersey's too stressful for me now. I don't think I can watch that show anymore. It's also, I don't find it to be entertaining anymore. Me neither. It's depressing. Jersey and New York both stress the hell out of me and I think it's just, I was traumatized when I lived there. It's like those accents and everybody's just so busy and on it and on you and like, it's too much. But yeah, they stress me out especially when they're on at the same time because normally it's Jersey and New York overlapping or on at the same time and I just can't take that. I need this break. I have to say though, the watching that Real House of New York City episode, it's sort of, you know, that series has its own unique tempo. All of them sort of do and it, you know, taps into the New York energy and you know, it's been over a year I think since Real House of New York City has been on the air. And I'm, they got me actually really pumped for it to come back even though we have sort of a new cast now and they're not really as good as that original five or six. I can't wait for it to come back now. I am like ready. I'm in Real House size of New York City mode. Yeah. I think it would be pretty good. I agree. Well, a moment that comes back. Oh, she has to. She has to. So that was a very spooky thing that happened. Should we just get right into some of the shows do we want to start with Miami? We want to start with Top Chef. What, what do you guys want to do? I am just again. I want to get a cow. I want to get a cow. I want to get a cow. She's on top of it. Oh, she's on top of it. Oh, she has to. She has to. She has to. She has to. So that was a very spooky thing that happened. Should we just get right into some of the shows do we want to talk, start with Miami? We want to start with Top Chef. Now, I was good this week because last week when we started talking about Top Chef, I could remember what the hell had happened. So this week I wrote down notes, but I was bad because I have no idea where I put the notes. So what the... Ben is late. Baby steps. Baby steps. Let's see, the, the quick fire challenge, someone was eliminated because, oh, you know what it was? I loved the quick fire challenge. The quick fire challenge was that Dana Cowan from Food and Wine Magazine came by and said, here are four food trends that I hate and I want you guys to make some dish and see if you can make me like the, the trend again. And what I loved is that she put bacon on there and I hope that every single Top Chef person who has a tattoo of bacon on their chest and between their nipples felt shame at that moment. Yes. And they actually showed a commercial, you know, do they have these people on some kind of contract where if they're on the show they have to do those terrible commercials where they're like, it's a Top Chef challenge with, you know, how can you make something delicious with beans and rice? Oh, it's a healthy choice meal. Great job. You know what I'm talking about? Yeah, I do. I do. I always fast forward over them though. Well, I watched one the other day because I was watching Top Chef live for some crazy red one and I was like, those people, they should be better than this, but they're probably not. I hope they got more than like $5. And no one always remember no one's better than anything you think they are, but they showed that guy with the kind of red headed bear guy who was on last year with the mustache of curly mustache, who I couldn't stand that guy. Yeah, he's really arrogant and he always wore those bacon shirts. So I felt like Dana Callan was saying, fuck you to that guy because I didn't like him and she was like, bacon is so over. And then they showed a commercial with that guy making $5 for a terrible commercial. I was like, Dana Callan has some sway. Yeah, I also love. She also was like, she was also very anti-kill and she was like, I don't want to see a kale salad. So then this guy, Brett or Brent, I think is his name, he goes and he makes a kale salad. I was like, you are such an idiot. What are you thinking? You could get eliminated right now. Why are you making a kale salad? Yeah, if you wanted to go home that bad, why don't you just put some frozen scallops on top of it? You fucking moron. Like certain things you just don't do on Top Chef. You don't disobey and you don't use frozen scallops. Yeah. So by the way, I found my notes. You guys want to hear my notes? Yeah, I'm dying to hear them. These are my notes in their entirety. Top Chef colon, quick fire colon, smoked bacon, kale, egg on top. Those were all of my notes. Well, why was I not copying you from college? I know. So anyway, the name here's the things that, well, let's talk more about these trends that are just over. I don't appreciate Dana Cowan telling me what's over and what's not. For example, what, we're just not using bacon now. I mean, come on. And then now she had said like bacon and desserts. I would have been like, OK, that's great. But like just bacon in general, you can't just tell people that bacon's a trend that's over. Like Jesus ate bacon. Well, no. Seriously. Lisa, you said. Oh, I was just going to say, I told, I know where you're coming from because bacon actually is a great way to kick something up a notch. If you've got something really boring and maybe doesn't have any meat in it or not enough, just that you need a little bit more flavor. But I think what she's talking about are these people who make something mediocre and then throw a thing of bacon on it. And they're like, laada. Now it's great. So basically you're calling my mima a hack. So you know what, mima, right to the gut. Well, no, here's the thing also. I think it's even more than what Lisa said or in addition to is that there's this whole kind of cult of bacon now where people wear t-shirts and they say, bacon, I love bacon or you have the guy from last year who's like, I'm going to do a bacon and do the basic bacon desserts. And they just, they think they're being very clever by using bacon. And it's no longer clever. It's no longer interesting. And I don't, I think it's actually annoying. I think it's this really, really annoying cheat that people do use. And I do agree. It's great if you put it into a salad or it does spice up certain dessert or certain dishes. But it's my mama sitting in New Bromfels, feeling double komp-punch right now. That's basically what it's like. She should be so lucky. She's going to make herself a bacon news out of her bacon t-shirts, she thinks you're so clever. Here's, here's to me when bacon ended was like about two years ago on Big Brother when there was that guy Adam who would not stop talking about bacon. I think he had like five different bacon t-shirts. I think he had to dress up as a piece of bacon at one point. I'm not sure. But to me, I was like, bacon is now officially over. Well, it's all over to me. I'm a good person now. So you guys enjoy your meat. Yeah. Yeah. I think that, you know, I, okay, you guys have made me see that bacon has been overused. But kale. Kale is not. Come on. Kale is a vegetable. You're just going to say people can't eat kale anymore. I mean, what the frick? Yeah, I feel like kale is still, I'm not over kale and I think it's a very healthy vegetable. And I think it's, I think it's a good thing. So I, I agree, I'm, I'm, maybe I can see maybe how the kale salad trend is getting overwrought. Like every restaurant has the kale salad now, but I don't mind because I like kale salads. You know what? I think anytime, like the talking about the trends, it just reminds me of when I was in college and people who I couldn't or high school and people who I couldn't stand like this one girl was obsessed with Tori Amos and she was so annoying to me that I was like, you know what? I may like Tori Amos, but I'm never listening to her music because you won't shut up about it. And I kind of feel like that's how people feel about kale and bacon. Kale is kind of like the Tori Amos vegetables. It is. Well, I think it's all these years. Yeah, I think, I think starting school at Jesus Chapel, um, killed Christianity for me. So I, I understand what you mean. I feel like I would be probably a good Christian if it weren't for the horrible Christians I grew up with. I loved how sad Padma sounded when, when Jenna Cowan announced I kale with something that she hated. Padma was like, I love kale salads though. Yeah, everything was like the luckiest metabolism. I've ever seen. Here's another trend. Here's a, Ronnie, you're coming in and out just so you know, um, I'm staying out, step out, I'm not, I'm not leaving. He's going out. He made himself a dress like he made himself a stole of kale and wrapped around his shoulders and he's going out. Um, the other trend that Dana Cowan said was, um, putting an egg on it, which I, I don't feel like that's really hit a fever pitch. And I have, I've also enjoyed the, the egg on things thing. So I'm going to post that trend. Uh, yeah, I'm so sorry that I wasn't speaking back. I was reading Facebook comments because I asked people to say what they want us to talk about. Um, none of it. It has anything to do with eggs on top of things, bacon or kale. Can you believe it? Well, let's get on to that. Let's get on to the main challenge of the episode, which I actually loved as well. It almost seemed like a quick fire challenge, but what they did was they went to the commander's palace, which, uh, I guess is a very famous old restaurant in New Orleans. And they had to, um, they had to eat this meal and then they had to recreate these certain iconic dishes from the menu. And I loved it. I loved watching these chefs, chefs, um, I love watching. Um, I love them all, uh, trying to emulate it and everything. I'm sorry. Can I interrupt for two seconds and just point out what assholes Ronnie and I were for two weeks. No, no. I loved it. I love it. I love it. It's like a chef who can stab you in prison. Yeah. Oh, like me, I was the asshole who then made it a riff on Chef or cheese, which is of course the French website saying go cheese. So we're all assholes, basically. Yay. Yay. So, um, the guy who went home, um, I'm trying to remember who it was. I think he was like the asshole who was the, who was friends of the hot guy. Okay. Now here is my theory about this year's top chef. I believe that there is a really fat, bitter gay guy working as a producer who gets to decide who stays and who goes because he's getting rid of people who chunky, gay people don't like. Okay. All the good looking guys who work out are getting cut first, basically. No, that guy, that guy Brett. I think that guy Brett is hot and he's, he managed to stay even though he is like, he's becoming like the idiot of the season. Do you remember top chef Las Vegas when there was Robin who was like the caterer that everyone, like all the voltagios hated her because she was like, sort of dumb, but kept on like failing upwards. Yeah. That's who is turning into, which one is he now? He is like the dopey one glasses who's sort of hot. Can he get kicked off? No, no, no. He stayed. I think, oh, did he get kicked off? Well, I think he still got eliminated because I remember thinking like you just worked out too much. Oh, you know, I think you're right. You may be right. You know what? I'm right now. Ben, realizing this is kind of like when I found out I was not what you really said. You literally cut off and you said, well, I found that I was not and then you cut off and left us on the lurch. I said this reminds me of earlier when I found this moment reminds me of when I found out I was not Matt's permanent replacement. There are a lot of a lot of startling revelations so far. Bombshells. A lot of haunted bombshells is Halloween podcasts and jails. Absolutely. All right. Well, I obviously can't remember who went home. I really thought it was this guy. I thought it was this guy Nicholas. Maybe not. I don't know, trying to look it up, but then every time I look up something on the internet, it makes everything go haywire in our podcast. Yeah, I'll look it up because I'm on a phone and don't do a lot of technology. And you know, if it makes you guys feel any better, Bravo does not information easily accessible. So I'm looking at it. That doesn't say anything. Doesn't say anything. Maybe nobody was eliminated. We all stay. We're like the big gumplepot. Anyway, the point is this. I'm continuing to enjoy the season. Even if I have trouble remembering what the hell happens from week to week. I went to the last last chance kitchen show. We're going to get this. Brat. Brat was eliminated. Oh, it was the hot guy who was eliminated. I knew it because it started. Okay. They were tricky this week because it started out with him working out and I was like, Oh, muscles. God. He thinks he's so great. And then it showed another guy talking on the sidekick of doom. That's when they talk on the cell phone to their family, which used to mean that they got kicked off. Yeah. But they totally tricked us. So this week, the person on the sidekick or Android compatible phone, whichever that could be at the moment, did not get kicked off and the guy with the muscles got kicked off. And I was like, you go fat casting person at Bravo. So, yeah, so that the two hot guys have now been voted off. And clearly I liked the second one so much that my mind blocked it. I was like, no, he is still there. Yeah. I still believe Brett is there. But he works out and if working out doesn't say what am I doing with my. But I am enjoying the season. There is like, there is a guy who's becoming an asshole, the guy who was friends, the first hot guy. He was like, he's like very, he was very condescending to Brett. Admittedly, Brett is a space cadet and annoying, but the guy was really cocky too. And I was turning into a total asshole, the guy with rosacea, or he's got that red shit on his red splotchy face. Oh, he's turning into a bitter little Betty and I cannot wait. He is. He is. He's doesn't have rosacea. He has bitch isa. Yeah. Yeah. He is. Got it. Got it. That totally landed. Yes. I, I think you should call that back later. It was so good. Yeah. But Jason. He's good. But Jason. Yeah. Whatever it is. And Asia burrino of the face. I would love that of his face is if his, if his cheeks actually turned into two little like, um, faces of Fantasia faces of Fantasia, I would totally use that perfume. I would, I don't have to worry about the ingredients because it's all in like a picture form. Pitch gobbledygook. She can't read for Fantasia that you'd spray that perfume on yourself and it would start coming out. And then it would just cut it. Oh, am I still cutting out? You are. You are. What's the trick? Everyone stop looking at your goddamn internet. Okay. All right. I was looking at the asshole guys. His name is Nicholas. Nicholas. I can tell because the internet's too weak to handle internet searches and talking. Okay. I'm closing it all. I'm just going to say that Fantasia, Fantasia perfume, you'd spray and it would start coming towards your face and then it would just quit midway. It would, it would have to apologize to Oprah for letting everybody down and then there would be a light side movie about the, about the cloud of perfume, starring the cloud of perfume. Yeah. Um, okay. So something on Facebook, people are talking about, which is really hilarious. Is it somebody? I think named Maggie. Oh God. I'm terrible with names. I can't look it up or it's going to ruin the podcast, but I think her name is Maggie. She posted a picture of Andy Cohen picking his nose. So if you watch the crap on Facebook, get over there because it's hilarious. I like that. And people are asking a lot about watch what happens this week. Have you guys been watching the Watch What Happens show? Uh, I'm, I'm behind. No, I haven't seen it. I mean, I have a basic rule not to watch it. I watched the, uh, queer eye thing and forgot how funny those queens were. I mean, they were hysterical. Carson Kressley. Yeah. Is so funny. I hope they bring that back because he's really good. They should bring that back. But that was the only one I really knew to watch this week and apparently we missed some good ones. There was Lisa Presley and they're saying that, uh, or Lisa Marie Presley and they're saying that Andy was super awkward with her and, uh, who else was on there? Let me keep reading this, but you guys, you know what? I could see that because she is so freaking cagey. I don't even know why she would go on there. Which one? Lisa Marie? Yeah. Well, she never gives interviews. Well, maybe she had to try coming out with an album again because that was hilarious. Remember that? Bless her heart. Oh, yes. Oh, I remember that Oprah interview. I think she single handedly killed tower records because that's the last thing I remember on the tower records on the sunset strip and I was like, Lisa Marie. Oh, come on. Yeah. Lisa. And then the next week it was gone. Oh, my God. It was like exploded. I totally forgot. I just, I just would have been hoping that Lisa Marie Presley would have had some special kiss with Andy Cohen. I'll allow Michael Jackson just to bring it back. Oh, kissing another gay guy. Yeah. Lisa, how dare you say that about Michael Jackson? Who's that? You know, I'm a Lisa Marie as well. This is true. This is true. I've always wanted to go to Graceland because apparently Elvis bought her a plane and it has Lisa Marie written in cursive and pink on the side of it. And one of these days I shall, I shall go see my plane and fly it somewhere. It's your, it's your destiny. Yeah, there's a special thing on that plane when you're sitting there flying somewhere. And if the stewardess is talking about where to go in case of an emergency exit and you talk during it, something comes out and punches you in the face. Just beep at Elvis, your wife abusing ass. Congratulations on all those albums. You sold wife beater. You guys. Oh, my God. You guys, I didn't know that Elvis was a wife beater. I have always loved Elvis so much. And the other day I was in the store singing that jailhouse rock thing because they have this big Elvis cutout in the Trader Joe's or an Elvis poster and I was kind of humming along. And some random lady I didn't even know came up beside me in her car and she's like, you know, he hit his wife, right? I said, that is not true. And she said it is. And then she just walked off so I can never fucking tell that Elvis. It was. And that woman was Priscilla Presley. It was probably like some Marie Presley and that's why she's going on fucking watch what happens. She's like, I just wanted to remind you guys that my father is a wife beater. I was a Trader Joe's and apparently not everyone knows that. So stop singing his music for God's sake. Listen, he got his in the end. He died on the shitter. Okay. So he got it. He got it. I'm getting it. That's like my dream is to eat like, I mean, that guy had the best Coke in the world. He ended up eating a pizza or some shit and just dying while he was pooping. It's like, you're sitting on the pot, you're pooping, and you're coked up. Those were like all my favorite things. Just put a dick in my ear and like, we'll be doing your bucket list. And he was perfect. That's what happened. I think you need to create a bet. I think you now need to create a photo with Ronnie's face and just put a dick in my ear. And posted to the watch what crappins. Well, listeners, you can know someone can post that to the wall. Please do not. I'm able to picture with me and a dick in my ear, please. Make sure Ronnie is wearing a white suit with rhinestones all over it inside buttons. So anyway, sorry, you guys. Thanks for asking me about what's what happens, but if you want us to watch a specific watch what happens, just tell us on the Facebook page so we'll know to watch it because I'm not putting that thing on the recorder again. When it was recording every episode, it would kill me because you get desperate and I press play and it just never ended well. And it's facebook.com/washworkcrapins. You should all like us. We have over 2,000 likes. I think our next goal should be 5,000. 5,000 likes. Yeah. Or like, how about like every other podcast and we get like 20,000. I mean, what the frick? What is that noise? Is that a good vote just land? What was that? That's my apartment. I think a speedboat just cruises by. Why are you guys laughing? I live on a boat now. Live in Meowthme. Live in Meowthme. And Alexia. You live in me. Oh my god. You know what? Stop it with the gonian antics, okay? That's my new favorite thing is draconian antics. So you guys, this is Jennifer Tilly doing a dramatic reading of a Melissa Gorgobuk, okay? This was posted on our, I hope you can hear this. Can you hear me? No. And I believe you interrupted my perfect Miami segue to play something that you cannot hear. Okay, damn it. You can't even hear that. No. You guys, I suck at the internet. I'm sorry. It's okay, Ronnie. Wait. You want to just slice it in? Yes. Let's get in. I'm going to laugh at it. It's editing work. It's basically this. My husband is mine. It's basically mine. Wait. Is that Fantasia burino again? No. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Was that, was that towed from Mario Kart? How dare you. He's a goddess too. Yes. Or at least to help. Okay. So now we're moving on to me, jammy. Let's talk about Real House House in Miami since I created a wonderful segue. Yeah, but I just kicked it off. Sorry. Sorry. I had to say the past few episodes, I thought have been a little dull, but I really think I really enjoyed this week's episode. What did you guys think? I enjoyed it because it was like so much awkwardness. It was fun to watch. It was so awkward. I have to say any time you see a woman making this big of a fuss over her third wedding and this one, it's like even her, it's her second wedding essentially to the same man. I always find that amusing. Wait a second. At least I'm afraid we may be out of sync here. I'm talking about the latest episode was when Leo went back to Texas. Oh, you know what, I totally missed that one. No. Okay. Here's what happened. How was it? Leah goes back to Texas. It was really hilarious because you saw her during her like fake Mary Kay. It wasn't, it was like an off-ground Mary Kay or something. You know what this was? I'm sorry to interrupt Ronnie. This was the episode when you discover about Leah that she doesn't always drink beer, but when she does, it's definitely no second because she's suddenly like the most interesting woman in the world. They like revealed all these things at one part in the middle of the episode. She's like, you know, I've always been a go-getter. You know, I was working in the fitness industry. I decided to go out and win a bodybuilding competition so that people would come to my gym. I'm like, what? I'm like, what? How did you build the competition? You know? And then she all just pulled in. She didn't need matrain for it. Just one day. I was like, you know what? I see this is going on down the street. Let me just sign up real quick. Yeah. That's probably exactly what happened because the whole thing was that Leah went back to Texas to visit her family. So when she went back to Texas, we learned all these things about her past. We learned about her company. We learned about her bodybuilding and that, you know, she used to like sell all around the world and all around the Caribbean. They were all, they showed these old infomercials of her, all these old photos. It was crazy. It was so funny because even back then, she was the same as she is now where she's like, I do everything. I've got to make a company. I'm a lawyer. I'm a doctor. I like bricks. You know, I've written books. I'm a blogger. I'm a fabulous, like she has like 20 things that she does and she was the same back then. And this was mostly about her Mary Kay business and we got to meet all the Mary Kay ladies, you know, who were on her team or whatever. And they, they were writing a bowl. They were at some bull writing place and they're like, Hey, of course, that's a great place for you to sell some product up on that, you know, Leah's like, I'm not a bull ride because I went to Pappy on a Spain and they were running the bowl. So I just hopped on one of them and rode through the streets with them. How fun is that? I thought there was going to be, there was going to be some sort of language barrier. No one was going to buy my makeup. But once I was on posters after writing that bowl, it changed the whole country. She's like, I went to Spain to ride the bowls and I didn't know how to speak Spanish. So I turned to someone. So how do you speak Spanish? And he said, see, and I learned it right then and there. How fun is that? You know that saying you can't put lipstick on a pig? Well, I did it in Spain and then it became a saying, oh, so bad. Someone told me I can never win a bodybuilding competition. They said I can win it when pigs fly. So I found the pig. I genetically modified it to give it wings and it flew off and I knew right then and there I could win a bodybuilding competition. How fun is that? You know, the bodybuilding was hard, but I got five more people to sign up for my jam and pay the lease. How fun is that? I don't know. Yeah. No, no, no, no. I sent them in voice. I sent them to the bodybuilding competition. Anyway, it's my muscles. Okay. So what was her other thing? So she was a makeup. She was a makeup lady and then she was a, she had a gym that she body built for. And then there was another one that she mentioned. I was like, what? It was like some quick little thing she dropped in like, well, you know, I'm trying to remember like, what? Back when I was breathing unicorns, I remember someone was asking me about glitter. You know, glitter dashed. I was like, what the hell? Where did that come from? She was a cheerleader. She had like everyone on the football team was like leaving her like apple pie. I was at their date. I had her to worst. Was she by herself or did she take somebody with her on the job? Oh, Lord. She took her off. She took her. She took her awkward son. And Lisa. Yeah. I knew it. I'm so, I love how this season it's all about Lisa trying to figure out how to maintain some relevance. Yeah. Well, it was, it was actually like a funny trio. I have to say, first of all, I love Leah's son. Because he's so like awkward and strange. And that's exactly how he should be. Well, I definitely had that moment where I was like, you know what, Ronnie, it's not just you. Every gay boy becomes their mother. I don't feel bad, stop being yourself up, stop trying to learn meditation, go to therapy. I mean, I tried going to a Marianne Williamson event last night. You guys here in LA to just do anything spiritual to whip Rhonda out of my soul. And I can't do it. And this kid is like proof that if the proof is in the pudding like they're like, well, hey, how was your trip, honey? How was your trip to Texas? Oh, it was horrible. It took forever. The plane was late. Then we had to wait for Lisa for an hour and a half with all the luggage. Just like, oh my God, give this kid a decent face left and he's going to turn into his mother. I don't think, I don't think he's, he doesn't read us as gay. I mean, he's 12. So I mean, how do you know? Shit, you asked the neighbors down the street if they've had their first blow job yet. That's how you know. Oh, what was I, I mean, I love our cats with 12 year olds, but they can have sex with each other. I, I love RJ. I think that he is like, I love that he has like this weird obsession with like, go. Oh, you see, you just got to set up on the internet, say it again. I said, I love RJ and I love that he has this weird obsession with guns. It doesn't seem scary. It seems just right. It seems like very appropriate, like a little boy obsession with like weapons and things like that. And he wears like big, strange, gold jewelry and I love the kid. I feel like he is not an only precocious, like every other child we see on TV. I think he's just right. No, he's, he's genuinely awkward and he's not punching homeless people in the crash. Yes. I think that's, that's a huge statement, you know, really, it's truly on this show. Yeah. And the news about this trip to Texas was that Leah is so mortified and ashamed of her like past. Yeah. And it would, that was really, really awkward to watch because I think that like if you're from a small town in Texas, you shouldn't be embarrassed. You should be like, Oh my God, especially if you're on a reality show that's coming to your house, you shouldn't be mortified. You should be like, this is where I'm from. This is the bull I used to ride. These are my girlfriends. This is my mom. And Leah was just like, Oh God, we'll talk to them if you have to. I'll be in here sitting by the fireplace trying to find a perception for my cell phone. So I can watch out what people are talking about on Twitter. I feel like there must be more, there must be more to the story than that because if she were truly mortified, she would not have invited the cameras to come to her home in Texas, you know, but at the same time, we also learned some tragic news, which is that Leah had a sister Kim who died, it sounds like about three years ago, three or four years ago in a freak accident involving a car and a car door and a break lock and she, it was what happened? I missed that. I saw it was coming up in the coming next on Real House. You missed that part? I didn't see that part. Oh my God, Ronnie, that explains a lot of things. What happened when she had this sister named Kim and Kim like parked her car, but it wasn't fully in part of her, something like that and she got out and I think the car somehow rolled and Kim got wedged between the car door and her husband's truck. I don't understand how that happened. Oh my God. And I cut off her breathing and so she died and that and it was a very poignant moment in the episode. I thought, Leah, I think we'll ever be the same and she said something that I thought was, I thought was particularly poignant where she says, you never get over it. You just get through it. And so that may have explained why she seemed a little aloof going back to Texas because it may have brought back a lot of memories. Yeah, that's so sad. What the hell? I mean, I knew something bad happened because I saw it in the previews, but I never saw that part. How did you not get that part? It was a full segment. Because it's Bravo and you know how it is when it's, when it's, when it's near, first of all, who's on the subway? Who was that? I think it's Lisa. I think it's Lisa, I'm on the subway. Are you in the zoo? Oh, wait. Oh, here hold a second. You guys keep talking. I'll be right back. Just make a transfer. Or she's peeing. Yeah. She's like in the subway or she's peeing. There's something weird going on there, but yeah, I don't know how I missed it. But you know how it gets to be time for the podcast and it's like, oh my God, last week we were talking about how there's nothing on right now. But today I'm like, okay, wait a second. There's, I dream of Nini, both the housewives, there were two hours of real housewives, there was Copshep, then this new Atlanta show, which we promised we would talk about this week. There was a lot of shit to watch. I was like, I need to sit my ass down and watch some brabs. So you know, some of it I'm cleaning dirt out of my nails or trying to see if I can bite my fingernails, which I used to be able to do and can't anymore. Sad. I'm back, guys, by the way. It's okay. Rodney was explaining why he fast-forwarded over the death segments. I thought it was kind of fishy. So much on there now. It used to just be like a housewives, top chef, a couple of things here. And now it's just everybody's getting a frickin spin off. I know. Well, let's see. What else happened on the Mammy show? So they went to Texas, which was funny and they were. There was something that happened in Texas with Lisa, okay, Lisa. She's kind of a bitch. I don't know why anybody wants to be friends with Lisa. She does not have your back. Like Lisa's showing up in a town with you is not her being supportive. It means that her husband refuses to film, her maid, who's her only friend, moved out of her house. And she has nothing going on in her own life. She's a fucking pool blow-up toy. And then she sits down with Lisa's family and she's like, "So, you guys, what's up with Lisa?" She's really like, "Errr, you know, what is that?" She's trying to get everybody to be mean about Leah. I don't know. I wouldn't trust a bitch. No, I mean, I've always felt that Lisa is a little tacky or a lot tacky. I mean, she's better than I thought she would be in terms of personality-wise. She's not as vapid as I thought she would be, but she is definitely good. Here's the thing. I don't even know that it's ghost. She's not that bright. She's just smart enough to be able to maintain conversations. She's learned a couple of vocabulary words, but if you'll notice in fights, someone's like, "I think my favorite moment was when Maric Sol was saying, Maric Sol goes, "Why are you sticking your nose in this?" It was like, "Really?" That's how she fights, and that's how she fought that entire fight. She's like, "You go away, you go away, you mind your own business, you mind your own business." It brought back memories of Joey and Ashley fighting on Princess' Long Island. Oh my gosh. You're funny. You're funny-looking. Hey. No, at least that was like an escalation. I think Lisa is just, she can only function, she's like high functioning blow-up doll. Which by the way, if you're a high functioning blow-up doll, that's impressive because any blow-up doll that has any function is actually amazing because they're made of plastic and have no cells. You know what she is? She's Kim Cutrell from when the mannequin came to life. Yeah. Okay. She's the mannequin. She's the mannequin. Oh, that would always explain why I always want to sing, 'cause we can build. I love that together. And things gone forever. That's the mannequin. Things gone to stop us now. 'Cause now a white person. It's ever, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that. I'll be on Rihanna's new show. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. What's going on with sitcom? I know. I know. Well, maybe was there a mannequin sitcom? I'm sure there was, like, a three-episode, like, "Mannequin," the TV show. There's a lot of it. There's been, actually. Oh, no. But there was a mannequin part two, but it was different. Yeah. That was, like, "Mannequin" on the run, or something like that. So anyway, guys. Oh, wait. So other things that happened in Miami, it was, the whole episode was really about parents and children, actually. We had Leah and Mom. Wow, I ended up supporting it. I'm sorry. There was, like, it was a very thematic episode. This is the way that, actually, the episodes used to be thematic, and this one was thematic. We had Adriana getting her son ready for his first formal. That was, like, a nothing. That was all that she was in the episode. We had Joanna and Roman were skyping with his parents, and he's, like, "Oh, great news. I'm getting married." And they're, like, "Oh, they're, like, um, eh, there's a new batch of croissants coming out, so we cannot go." By the way, I love that Joanna and Roman never, never having sex just validates me as a person. No kidding! Makes me sad. I'm, like, these both of them are so fucking hot that clearly you should not be getting married. If he's not fucking, if he doesn't want to have sex with her now, then he's never going to. I feel like this is the first time on TV we've really seen sexual dysfunction portrayed as being normal, because, like, look, how often can you fuck? Like, seriously. Like, after you do it the first few times, it's the same old thing, but it smells worse, because people stop, like, taking as good care of it once they get to know you, and then it's, like, they're just flopping all over. And then you end up having to watch porn anyway to make it happen, and it's, like, why am I even bothering? Like, I can't even see the screen when I'm taking care of you. Why am I even bothering? Get the hell out of here. You don't have a job. Get out. I just can't tell, it's really funny, because you can't tell why Roman has even agreed to allow this to be discussed, because he's obviously really uncomfortable. Well, maybe, maybe. This episode is sponsored by DoorDash. We're back to tell you more about the latest Dash Pass annual plan benefit, StreamMax with ads included at no extra cost. You know what's a great night for us? Ordering DoorDash and cuddling up to watch the Max Original Hacks, which won Best Comedy, deservedly so, and we love tuning in to see not only icon Gene Smart, but the wonderful and incomparable Rose Abdu, who also is a huge Bravo fan. Listen, I'm always in the mood for hacks, but you never know what kind of food I'm in the mood for. Sometimes it's pizza, sometimes it's a salad, and I can get both with DoorDash. How about some ice cream? That's what I like to eat with my hacks. A hundred percent. I will double Dash. I will get a salad and then double Dash some ice cream. Why not? Look for a Dash Pass annual plan and get Max included at no extra cost. It's your door to more. Max is now included with your Dash Pass annual plan. StreamMax with ads up to $120 value included at no extra cost. Terms apply at doorDash.com/maxfor details. Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile. With the price of just about everything going up during inflation, we thought we'd bring our prices down. So to help us, we brought in a reverse auctioneer, which is apparently a thing. Mint Mobile unlimited. Premium wireless. Have it to get $30, $30, $30, $30, $30, $20, $20, $20, $20, $20, $20, $20, $15, $15, $15, just $15 bucks a month. So give it a try at mintmobile.com/switch. $45 up from payment equivalent to $15 per month. New customers on first three month plan only. Taxes and fees extra. Speed slower above 40 gigabytes. CDTail. Yeah, it's like a woman that almost makes this alibi, like if you didn't want to discuss it. My theory makes no sense whatsoever. Well, my theory is that last year, he learned that if he doesn't have a storyline, it's all going to be about who he's fucking while Joanna's out of town. So this year, he was like, oh, better get a storyline because the bus girl, I'm fucking the bar back. Okay. Well, I'm not having sex. Okay. We'll do it. I just, I just wanted to go back to when she's trying to have sex with him and he just wants to play weed. Joanna, why you do this to me? Joanna. Just want to play weed. Let us play the weed. You are really good at getting him in the mood by saying, just fuck me already. Fuck me. Fuck me. Fuck me. Yeah. No pressure there. She's like, I want to do it now. You're such a woman. Why don't you ever want to fuck me? You're so stupid. Where'd your manhood go? I put up missing signs for your manhood all over the neighborhood. So I hope somebody calls me. I don't understand why you can't get a boner with me berating you constantly. Oh, finally you have a boner. Wait. That's just the weed control. She's like, why is it that every time you're fucking me, I always hear bowling pins falling over. Oh, wait. You're just using the weed controller in me. Goddamn it. Do we get a high score? At least tell me that. Why don't I always hear Mario jumping every time you're in me? You want to do far? Sorry. I'm like Joanna, so reading all of these comments right now on Facebook and have to say, sorry guys, Matt quit. So I do not even want to hear about it on the Facebook page. You tweet his ass at like on the em list and you tell him that he let you down. We didn't do it. He quit. So speaking of not quitting, let's talk about Alexia who like, oh, you know, she like never quit on anyone like Frankie or Peter or her drug lord husband, like she doesn't give up on anyone and Marisol should not give up on anyone either. Oh, you know, that was basically my, the, the story line. Alexia, that sounded like Lexi. Was that who you were doing? I was. Yeah. That was, that was Alexia. Oh my God. I love that. I love the anniversary party. You declared what? I'm sorry. I was telling Lisa that last year we realized that every time we do it in Alexia personation which starts with, oh, well, you know, yeah, you sound just like her. And she also talks very staccato like this, she's, she's very, she's a Cuban doll. So I don't know what you're talking about because I have a magazine because I think it's very important for poor people to be able to see how the rich people like so they don't murder them. So I'm talking a lot of photo shoots, guys. I like, I like Lisa's version of Alexia. He's like, I'm just trying to tell you what's going on because that is sort of like Alexia's entire MO in life is like, I'm just trying to tell you what's going on. Like, why are you trying to tell us what's going on? She should have like her own news network, like, okay, okay, you guys, you know, there's a breaking news story. I'm just trying to tell you what's happening on the news right now. Don't be mad at me. Don't, don't get mad at me about the traffic. I'm just trying to tell you that there's traffic. I mean, I'm not saying that you got to get into it, but you know what this traffic. And you know what? It's going to be an extra 20 minutes on your drive home. But you know what? You have to just like stay with it because the moment that you don't stay with it is the moment the traffic is going to get worse. Okay. You just have to get to it. Okay. Look, I can't keep talking. I got a photo shoot. Okay. Okay. Stay in the news. You just got to come with me to the photo shoot because we are doing a cover model, so stay with me. Okay. Like that's it. What? I put fucking Mario's soul. She's like, hello, I came to your anniversary party. I'm not having a good day. She's like, you know, I'm afraid I'm losing my mom. You know what? Guess what? You are losing your mom. She's like 90 years old and she had a stroke. Leave her alone. Like get your own storyline. Jesus. Let the woman die in peace. Get the cameras out of her fucking bathroom where you know they are making like a web series of Mama Elsa slowly dying. It's like, Mama Elsa just wants to be alone. Leave her alone. She could not have been more of a Debbie Downer at that anniversary party. It's like, I brought red velvet cake, my mom's dying. I have to say though, I still love Marisol because she, I think I just really like any housewife who openly gets trashed on the show constantly. Marisol is just like, oh can I please have a, can we just settle down and have a cocktail already? Please? I actually feel like Marisol has been funnier this season than she has been before. She's been a little looser, which is surprising. I think she, I really like her every, you know what happens? Every single episode this season, she'll say one thing that just cracks my shit up. And I think it's because she's not afraid to laugh at herself. This just in from the Alexia news report. Oh, well, you know, Marisol is like much funnier. You know, I'm just saying, just saying, he's just breaking news bulletin from Alexia news news reports. I would watch that channel, by the way, you know what, I love everything Alexia wears. Oh, yeah. No, she looks great. She looks my favorite. Well, just housewife. And I love her house, actually. I love her house. I love her mom too. I love how her mom just sort of like melts into any nearby chair. And then just says, ah, you know, I'm surviving. Are you? Yeah, I do love that the mom is like giving her psycho analysis in a real picky accent. I think that you need to do right now is not be a loser, like your father. If you just don't be loose or like your father, you go to, you go to be fine. Yeah. Whereas chunky jewelry, shoulder pads, and no bra at all times, and it's, and some sort of. Have you ever been to Miami? She fits right in. She's great. If you don't have chunky jewelry, shoulder pads and you're wearing a bra, you need to get the fuck out. Yeah. So, um, that's basically all that happened in Miami. I mean, were there any other things that jumped out of you guys or should we move on to the new Atlanta? Um, well, I do like that Alexia's anniversary party is obviously like the rumors about her husband being gay have been swirling forever. But then when her husband just walks on and he's like in a pink shirt, he's like, he's like the guy he used to be on Fred Flintstones bowling team. And he's like, fabulous. And he's like, okay, honey, you know, everybody is here for anniversary. So give your speech. And he's like, I love your Alexia. She's like, okay, I'll give the speech. And then she talks for 30 minutes. So it's like that poor guy is just like, please just put a dick in my ear and let me go back to him. I love Alexia's stories also because it's basically one long rambling sentence with her saying, and then, and then, and then she's like, and then the thing with Frankie, uh, you know, that was very hard for us. And then we got a new car and that was hard because we didn't know if he liked the car, but then, and then they opened up a new road, so we could drive a new car to the road. And so we were thinking about all these things, it was tough. But then Dan Peter grew his hair out long, and then we have so many things to be thankful for. So, oh, you know, like it's just, I'm just saying what I'm thankful for, which is all of you, you know. Well, that's hilarious. I love Alexia. I love her too, actually, unless she's being really annoying with like, you know, the thing about this show is like, I love them all like the ladies on it. It's just been so boring this year. You know, yes, it really has. But the prettiest for next week look awesome because it looks like someone gave Joanna a glass of wine or something because she's going off on Lisa. So that's going to last the rest of the season. I think that feud. No, no, no, I hope they do remember the last season of Real House House of New York when they had a whole new cast in and the chemistry wasn't quite right. And the first half was really boring. And then someone told like the producers, you know what, just put every, just make every episode just full of fights, like not just one fight at the end, make it like a fight in the first 20 minutes, a fight in the second 20 minutes and a fight at the very end. And then the season just like went off the rails in the best possible way. That's what I hope happens for the rest of Miami season. Yeah, that sounds good. I hope it does. I don't have very much hope, but I do wait, that didn't make any sense. Never mind. Let's just talk about something else. I don't have much. We're just tired. We're moving on to New Atlanta. Let's go to the New Atlanta. So this is the first full episode that I had seen, which revolved around a charity fashion show for cystic fibrosis cystic fibrosis and simultaneously had some sort of weave pulling catfight going on. So on the one hand, I really did appreciate that juxtaposition. On the other hand, I'm not totally sold on this show yet. What did you guys think? Lisa. I actually haven't seen this episode. Are you talking about the New Atlanta because I was typing on our Facebook again? Yes. You know what's so funny is that this isn't even a live show anymore, and I'm still acting like it is. I'm like, hey, guys, I'm like, we just talked about that. Didn't you hear it? And they're like, no, we're not. We can't hear your show. Like, when are you going to get this for your thick fucking head? It's not live. So who got in the fight? Okay. Let me explain what happened on the episode. Okay. We have to do the fight, though. You know that, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We will. So the episode pretty much began with what's the girl with the bad roots students? The black girl was a white girl. The black girl with the bad roots who's like moving in on Vaughn trophy. Why? I forget a real name. Yeah. She's the one that's not for it. Alex. Alex. Okay. So Alex does open a bond test. Dude. What a softer Jesus. I'm not typing. Lisa. That was me. Sorry. That's like 80. That's like 80. That's like 80. That's like 80. That's like 80. That's like 80. That's like 80. That's like 80. Oh, well, you're going like, and then I had to get on the typewriter, you know? That's the sound that a breaking news bulletin's coming in from Alexia. So her name is Alex, right? Yeah. So Alex went and hung out at Vaughn's house. Vaughn is like the guy who's like a low rent version of Common. I mean, he's like, he's sort of sexy, but you kind of- Or Common version. He's the Common Common. He's sort of like when you first look at him, you sort of think, oh, that guy's sexy and swab and confident. And then the more you look at him, the more you realize he's actually not that sexy. And he just wears good accessories. He's not sexy. And everyone thinks he's so sexy because he makes records or whatever. And they assume that he's so rich. Okay, look, he's taken care of some kid he dropped and left. And then he's got some little apartment that he's microwaving dinner in. Like, come on. Can we raise our standards a little bit over here? It's just a glance to and you only live in an apartment. Then you must be really firm because we know- Well, and- You know, the poor- And his sideburns- That shows. I feel like his sideburns are like crazy. His facial hair is like crazy. Like he needs to figure out what's- I think at their certain age, you can't- Yes. Wait. Everyone, Lisa just cut off. Say again, Lisa. I said after- I think after a certain age, especially- Oh, this is- Point. We'll never be made. He says. Yeah, that point will never be made, Lisa. Well, guess what? You know what? We're moving on. It wasn't that great. This is one- This is one- This is one- McQuid. Looks like a two-brillipad attached to his cheeks. Yes. Well, also he talks like an idiot on purpose because he thinks it makes him sound cooler. Like he'll be like, "Yeah, I was trying to get with him and wanted to know what you want to end me." I'm like, "You know that that's not a sentence and you know that you're talking in some backwards ass accent and you do not talk like that in real life. I refuse to believe that you're that uneducated and hickish that you don't know how to talk. You're trying to make it sound like you're like 20 and you don't care and you're not 20 and you should care." Okay. You're a fucking adult. He's obviously too old to be doing this shit. And he's the type that also likes to speak in generalities about or is that a word generalities, generals? I can't even tell anymore. But he says things like, "Well as-" He makes generalization. Generalization. Thank you. You're welcome. I'm like, "All those shavs over there." No, but he likes to say things like, "Well, as a man, you know, it's important for me as a man to do this and you know, for my woman, because for a woman, I'm like, "I hate when guys are being like as a man and for a woman and it's like shut up already." Especially when it's so sexist, it's like, "I'm never going to promise anything to my woman because it's like shut up, you know, like this whole, you know, just be honest with a woman while you keep her down and treat her like a total whore. Like get over yourself and stop it. You're some freckle-faced idiot who can't put a sense of, "Okay, look, this is what he actually said. This is the only show I took notes on because it got to the point where I had to write down what he was saying because I couldn't believe it. Okay. One of them is he's talking about, he's talking to Africa in some couch store about, you know, their relationship. And she's wearing the Carmen Sandiego hat and because he can't film in his apartment because he can't even get the camera crew in there. So basically they're in some couch store and she are literally in a couch store. Yeah. And he's telling her, he's telling us how he has to be vulnerable. I was like, "What? Everyone that five times." And I'm like, "You know what vulnerable is. Stop it. Stop it." He's like, "Is that how the kids are saying it? Is that the new urban dictionary way of saying, "Vunable. Vunable." And then another thing he said was, "That's not cool with my equilibrium." Yes. Yes. Oh my God. Please. Stop it. You're hurting everybody. He's losing America. He's literally going to fall over. If Africa keeps asking him where they are in a relationship, he is going to fall on his side because his inner ear can't trigger anymore. God. I don't see the attraction at all. I don't get it. Well, I get it for Africa because the girl can't sing and has no talent. She just has big hair and a fun name. Like that's pretty much-- Her name is not fun, by the way. Africa is not a fun name. It is when you're not there. When you're not there, it's elephants and crabs in your backyard. When you're there, it's like great murder and getting, you know, de-handed for taking a banana off a tree. Well, you know what? I still don't see the attraction at her because you know who else lives in that city, Jermaine Dupree. That's who you should be fucking sweetheart. Yeah, exactly. Who's the looking little man who's actually got his shit together? Yeah, exactly. You know what? That's a great point, Lisa. This woman is an idiot because of all the people that she's going to hoard out to do it for like some-- A low level producer that we've never heard of. I mean, you're in Atlanta. Do you know? Throw a rock and you'll hit a producer. Oh my God. You even can be burs and you don't even have to pay her. Yeah. Just agree to babysit Riley a couple weeks. Hey, Rod. He has a new babysitter in Africa. Yeah, in Africa, I feel bad because now that I've actually seen her in action, because they showed Africa doing a show that she produced, you know, with her and her. She is these three girls who are trying to be kind of modern day. What are those sisters? A vogue. Oh, no. The Pointer sisters? Pointer sisters. Well, I guess we should say in folk, but they're way too white to ever be a vogue because in folk was good. Well, so are the Andrew sisters from like the 30s or the 20s or whatever. The Andrew sisters. They're trying to like where it's three part harmony and I was like, you guys, this is, these are all dissonant chords and none of them even maps the original note. This isn't worse. This is just terrible. Please don't sing ever don't like don't even sing video game music. Like don't even hum. I, I, you know, you're winning Tetris for me. That's like a Russian song. Oh, well, you know, so it's already kind of ruined. So I sort of assumed that Africa was kind of smart. I don't know why. I think it's because she has like big hair and she speaks, you know, relatively intelligently, but then she's cute and she doesn't, she doesn't speak like fajor parks. But she has attracted this guy in the way that she makes excuses for this guy. And says, you know, I will take an honest man over someone who will just tell me anything, you know, in order to get into my pants. I'm like, why do I just don't take either one of them? Okay? Yeah, exactly. Or just, you know, think that, oh, the honest man, it'll be a lot quicker to decide to dump him. Yeah. Like flying. Yeah, like, you know, and you know, there is something to be said about someone who wants to flatter you, you know, there is something to be said about that Africa as opposed to the guy who's like, well, you know, like, you know, you're amazing and you got a great heart and you're beautiful, but I'm fucking around and I'm fucking this girl, Alex. And then he, and then he has the balls to say that Alex came over to his house and he goes, but I did not cook for her. I was already cooking and I was the gentleman that I am that I offered her some of my chicken, but I did not cook for her. I'm like, shut the fuck up. Why did you sir? Why did you cook for breast of chicken in a lovely way just for yourself? Okay? Why don't you defrost all those Costco frozen chickens and like, wash them with lemons and put like, like sprigs of rosemary on it just for yourself and be like, Oh, oh, I guess you can have some of that. Well, in his defense, he did not fuck her, which I was shocked by because I thought he was going to fuck her. You broke out. Did you say in his defense he did not fuck Alex? Yes, because I thought he was going to. Well, well, I think it's, I think it was a good move that he did not go after her because she's nothing special. So anyway, so the other big story of the episode was, and we will get back to this Alex girl and Africa, but we have to get to the other story, which is that the white girl, Emily, not to be confused with Emily too, who works, Emily too, works in Emily's store. I like, by the way, I love how this show is all white people are the same. Yeah, they have the same names. You know what? Because you know what? I'm sorry, like people you deserve that, at least one show. Yeah. Everyone is just fucking. Every white girl is Emily. Yeah, we totally do. We do deserve it. And I also love how like, in other shows when there's like two people of the same name, it's like Emily R and Emily M. But in this case, it was just Emily too, like you just get your number. Emily and Emily and the latter Emily. Yeah. If there's an Emily M, it mean it's like like a Roman numeral, Emily 100 or 50 or 1000. I don't know my Roman numeral. So anyway, Emily decided to put on a fashion show. Her really annoying friend came over, whose name I don't even know. But she was like, Oh my God, like, let's just put on a fashion show, ready for cystic fibrosis. Oh my God. Okay, I have to interject here because this was my favorite part of the episode. And a lot of fun stuff actually happened in this episode, but this was my favorite part, Emily. Well, you know, my sister, when she was born, had this disease and she died of it. And then my brother has it and he says it's like breathing through coffee struts. I mean, that's why they adopted me so they could have one kid that didn't have district, you know, to pass on the bloodline. Basically, your parents adopted you just in case the other ones died. That is the most horrible story I've ever heard on TV and especially they got me just in case the other ones died of it, yeah, so it's something near and dear to my heart. She's like, I'm a human insurance policy. So then we had about 20 minutes of her prepping for her fashion show and freaking out about it, which is like, this is like a standard Bravo thing where some stupid person decides to put on a fashion show and things that they're in fucking Milan, when in fact they're in some club in downtown Atlanta with a bunch of drunken frat boys hanging out there. Like, no one cares if your fashion show starts five minutes late, no one cares. If your models aren't fully dressed, no one cares, no one knows the difference. Also, it's not like clothes that you made, you know, it's just like, oh my God, he was going to wear that tie-dye dress that we bought from old Navy took the tag off of and sold our own tag into that. And I love there was like this whole drama with Emily too, because Emily too was late in getting the models over to drive and names sincerely, which by the way, I didn't know that we were naming kids after adverbs now, but I guess we are like you can't name your kids sincerely and not add a comma at the end. Like at least at least name her like sincerity. That almost sounds like a name, but since it's a noun, at least it's a noun. Yeah, like it almost like like, like Constance or like, I don't know, but um, or name your child, generality. Generality? Chems? Have you met my child silently? No, I met them quite loudly. Her name is silently. Silently. But I guess, seen it not heard. So, um, so sincerely shows up late, whatever. So Emily is freaking out about it, but also sincerely shows up late because Ronnie, you're cutting out. And sincerely, sincerely shows up late because she's got some magical gig, walking a red carpet for 30 minutes. Like what? What's going on in Atlanta, where sincerely has to show up to walk a red carp. Like what? What's happening in this town? This means that like a hardware store opened up and and they're having a red carpet and the biggest celebrity they could get is a woman named sincerely. People always think about the screws. They don't think about the washers. This has been a message from sincerely. I'm nuts and I got a bolt. So anyway, so then the fashion show starts happening and so stupid and amateurish. There's fashion show is just a shade away from a school graduation, you know, where someone walks up, gets a diploma and makes a weird like face at the audience. That's what every model is doing. Every model is like, especially the guys. They walk the end, pull up their shirt. One guy counted all his abs and did like, call me, all of them were at one point, triple. That's the name, triple. And by the way, there's a guy named, triple. That's awesome. There's a guy named, triple. I think that when he's an old man and he's got jello just like dribbling down his mouth. I think that the nurses are going to laugh. That's how can you not like it's like a fate. It's like his fate. Yeah. He doesn't even know that he's named after a feature from Star Trek. Yes, exactly. That's the first thing that I thought of, triple and sincerely. So triple at one point, he just takes off his shirt and I'm like, listen, dude, you're trying to sell the shirt and I'll take it off. So anyway, while this is all happening, Africa goes into the bathroom and Alex goes in the bathroom also. This was clearly not staged, even though there were cameras. Oh, yeah. And some fight where Africa is like, oh, you stalking me? And I was like, I wouldn't have to stalk you because I got everything I need right here. And then Africa is like, oh, well, you got everything right here. Well, I see as a joke. She's like, I'm not a joke. I'm serious. You can look at me. You can see all of me. I'm like, I can see your roots. Your roots are up front and center. Oh, well, your roots are like, let's do this fine. Okay. Do you want to be Africa or Alex? I don't care because it's all blurred to me. So you choose one. Can I be Emily, too? Yeah. No, no, no, no, no. No, Lisa has to be Emily one who is like, who in the middle of this fight, literally every 30 seconds, they cut to a confessional with Emily being like, I'm so glad we've raised awareness for cystic fibrosis. So my siblings can stop that. For every person who walked into club is another person who knows about cystic fibrosis cut back to the bathroom and he's too bitches fighting. It was so surreal. If it weren't for cystic fibrosis, I'd still be unadopted. This is all to donate the spread cystic fibrosis to save orphans can't please. If it weren't for cystic fibrosis, I'd be Emily number two and Emily number two would be Emily number one. If I, if it weren't for cystic fibrosis, I'd have some poor parents somewhere being the foster system. I'd just be working in this store instead of making it work. Excuse me. I got to go to a hardware store red carpet. I'm not. It's got a bolt because that was too good not to steal in the same fight. It's got a bolt. I've been Emily number one for ace hardware. Okay. So let's do the fight. Okay. So Africa walks into the bathroom. Alex is like, Oh, Africa's going to the bathroom. Okay. So all be Alex and you be Africa. Oh, hello. You're the bathroom. So are you stalking me now that we're doing you? Oh girl, stalking what? You're stalking. We're in a bathroom. Oh, yeah. At least I, at least I know what a bathroom looks like. At least I know what a toilet is. At least I lease my own toilet. At least I own things. At least I have parents who can buy me things. Oh, well, so your mom buys you things. I don't think you own anything. At least I have a mom. Well, you know what? Like your mom's a wonderful person and they always say the apple doesn't fall for. Yes, he is. But the apple fell for the tree and the old downhill and a worm got into it. Oh, the ground. Oh, you're on the ground. Well, that's because I'm grounded. At least my head isn't in the clouds. Look at your hair. Look at your hair. You have hair. I'm really glad that everyone is learning about suicide. Get out of here. So seriously, it's calling you. You know what? You know what? I've got, it's because I am grounded in my womanhood. Oh, oh, you're in a hood. That's right. Because my parents have money in your poor with your hair. Look at your hair. Ugh. So, well, this just, in this the Alexia news break, there's like a fight in Atlanta right now. I'm just saying what's happening. Okay. I got to go. And then there's a fight. Okay. Oh, we're in a bathroom. Like the fight made no sense. It went from one thing that made neither one of them had one witty intelligent thing to say about the other. Like, look, one of you is named Africa. Okay. The reason why they had to keep cutting to Emily number one is because at one point, you know, they kept on turning to the producer and be like, uh, line, line, but you know when they say that reality shows are really written. I really wish that that was true in cases like this because those girls can't even handle a fight. Like all they did was say things like, ew, look at your hair. Ew. My mom's rich. Ew. Well, at least you are. There was a big fight if you are. I will say though, I love the lighting in that bathroom. It was like a dark bathroom with like lights and I, you know, that's how bad the fire. Damn, that happened in real, some more bathroom fight scenes. I think that that's just the proof that even the bathroom knows how to light black people better than any show on network television. Yeah, that's true. That's definitely why can we suddenly see black people on TV now? It's like they finally got people who don't work for network television because every time there's someone, any time you see any black character on network television, you can never see them. They're like, they give them no light and they put them against the dark wall. You know, it's like, what the hell, man? Learn the light black people. This is just getting racist. So I'm glad to see that the new Atlanta is picking up the slack. Thank you. Well, that's why it's called the new Atlanta because with the new Atlanta comes new lighting schemes. They're like, like, black people finally are really on your TV. Finally. It's finally related to sincerely. That's, that's what, that's what that's just good. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. This is my sister finally. And this is my sister finale. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. It's so stupid. So anyway, I think we have reached the limit of all the shows we can talk about because. Oh, we haven't even gotten to Neenie. Neenie was so wonderful. Okay. We'll just have to give it up. Maybe we'll talk about Neenie next. Listen, we didn't talk about the Jersey lost footage either, which was stupid. There's, we just have to cut it off. We have to cut it off. We talked, we've covered a lot of stuff. All right. We covered Miami. We covered Top Chef. We covered New Atlanta. We covered gossip. We covered all sorts of things. We just have to end. We have to end. Okay. Okay. So before we go, let us make some promises of shows that we'll watch next week so people know what they can watch and don't have to like try and watch 10 hours of TV that we only talk about five minutes. Okay. What's the promise? I'm making no promises. I'm a promise. Like I still haven't seen last week's Miami. I'm like, I'm like bons, I'm just going to tell you, I'm going to do shit for this. Actually, you say, you're great because I don't think you saw any of the episodes we talked about today. No, I shouldn't. And you went from like, you went from like Hollywood to Echo Park on that subway. I mean, you made it, you, I'll, I'll like typing on my typewriter. Yes. Doing so much. So Lisa, you're a champ because you were able to come along with us even though you really didn't know what we're talking about half the time. Yeah. Thank you so much for being, for coming on this. You guys are so sweet. And anytime that we've gotten positive feedback, if we ever get negative feedback, then those people can go fuck themselves. Yes. Anybody who's been really sweet saying that they like me, guesting occasionally. Thank you. Thank you. Because it does a lot for me. Yes. I need this. You are probably our favorite guest. I need this. Okay. So this week, let's say New Atlanta because I actually have to watch it now because now I saw this one and we have to see the end of the bathroom. I have to say, I actually, I feel like this is going on a Vanderpump Rules arc for me, which is that. Yes. Okay. So dumb. And now I got to watch next. Because you know what? Just talking about it. This past 15 minutes or an hour, however long we've been talking about them, they were so fun to make fun of them that I realized I have to watch this show now. Oh my God. It's going to be so pissed that he quits and we finally start talking about this show because he was behind the show for the beginning. We're like, no, that's stupid. He's like, fuck you guys, I quit. I'm on a new podcast called People Are Nice to Me. Called New Atlanta. Okay. So we'll watch New Atlanta and we're actually there's kind of a dead zone week, right? Because there's no more Jersey. So Top Chef Miami. Okay. Top Chef Miami. And is that it? A million dollar listing is over, right? Okay. So if we watch Nini, if we do Nini, we're going to have this next week, we'll have to be two podcasts because four shows in one podcast, it's too long. Well, we don't have to talk about dicks in here next week. We can keep Top Chef shorter. Yeah. Okay. Well, this was super fun, you guys. Oh, yeah. You do that in part. Sorry. Do you see how I take over? Okay. Listen. Alright, everyone. Thank you so much for listening. Please like us on Facebook, facebook.com/watchworkcrapins. We really like it when people like us because we have low self-esteem. And we also love it when you tell us what you think was really funny in the podcast, too. I don't know why. You can also please follow us on iTunes. iTunes just do a search for Watchwork Crapins. You can also follow us on SoundCloud or Stitcher if you want, but iTunes, everyone loves iTunes. You can follow Lisa at Tim and Lisa on Twitter. Thank you, Lisa, so much for coming on this week. I'm sure we'll have you back very soon. Maybe even next week. Who knows? Maybe even next week. And I just want to point out, too, if you like the report that Ben and I have, then you can also check out our podcast, Banter with Ben and Lisa. Yes, indeed. Please do listen to that. And like us on Facebook, too, facebook.com/banter with Ben and Lisa, I think Lisa, how about we recorded a new episode tomorrow? That sounds fantastic, Ben. So I want to look forward to that. And you know what we should do? We should have Ronnie as a guest and basically just do this podcast all over again. Yeah. Pretty much. Tomorrow, Banter with Ben and Lisa will all be about counting Weight Watchers points and killing animals instead of being a vegan and sad and dreaming of M&Ms. Yeah. Yeah. We actually already-- It's a much better life. So you can follow Ronnie @Trash2eTV on Twitter. And you can follow me @bsideblog. And thanks everyone for listening. Tell all your friends. We want to get more listeners to get addicted to our podcasts. And I guess that's really it. That's all I have to say. Anyone else? Spread it like an STD, y'all. Yeah. Pretend you're on it. Banter ball. Get it around. Yeah. Spread it like a cold. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Bye, everyone. Bye, everybody. Love you. Bye. Call me later. Try watching it on the internet. The folks behind the side show network have launched a new YouTube channel called Wait for It. It's got interviews with comedians like Reggie Watts, Todd Glass, Liza Schlesinger, slicing, driving friends with it for 10 years, one of the funniest people out there. And I still have a hard time with the last name, Liza. Our very own Owen Benjamin, that's me, takes you on a musical journey down internet rabbit holes and much more. You don't have to wait any longer. Just go to YouTube.com/waitforacomedy. There's no need to wait for it anymore because it's here and it's funny and I love you. 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