Horse Tragedies, Wagon Jumping, and Vanderpumping
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#62: Horse Tragedies, Wagon Jumping, and Vanderpumping
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Hey, welcome to Watch What Crapin's a podcast about all the crap we'd love to talk about on Bravo. I'm Ronny Karen from TVgasm.com and as huge, I'm here with Matt Whitfield of Yahoo. Hello, Maddie. As huge? Did you say huge? Yeah, I'm trying to make things faster so I'm only using half words. Oh, okay, I'm happy to be here. That was half of here. Hey, Mr. Ben Mabukar of Beside Blog.com. Hello, Benji. Hey, that was my half of hello. I also don't like him being called Benji. That's gross. It was half. No, I don't mind being called Benji. You know what I don't like is when people call me Benny, because it makes me sound like I'm some person from Yonkers. You have Benny, Benny's like an old cab driver who like, "Hey, Benny. Hey, Benny, what's called Benny?" But you do root for the Jets. You do root for the Jets, Ben. Benny and the Jets. That is actually very true. I will accept it in that context. Yeah, Benny. Benny's not good. Benji was like the cutest dog ever, so you can't complain about being called Benji. I wasn't complaining. Matt was complaining. Well, man, I was complaining on his behalf. He was my proxy complainer. But you don't mind when I call you Maddie, right? No, like all of the girls at college called me that and I consider you one of my college girlfriends. So why not? Wait, so Matt, what nickname would you not want? Anything is fine by me, I think. I also enjoy inappropriate nicknames as well. Does anyone ever call you a cow face? Okay, that's really kind of you. Cufface? What? Cufface. Don't start. Don't start. Cufface with field. That doesn't matter that fat face, when we call it cow face, it is better to just call it cow face. Oh my God, did anyone ever call you just a few, like the second half of Matthew? No, no, don't get Ronnie any ideas. Yeah, that makes more sense today because it's the day of half words. You see how much time we've saved so that we can talk about this bullshit, you guys? Oh, it's great. We've already spent two minutes talking about nothing about Bravo except Fraca face and reduced truncated words. Yeah, well, we were short a couple of shows this week because Real Housewives of Atlanta decided to take a break and so did the shaws because for some reason they think that that's their audience. Like, Bravo, you play these shows 10 times a fucking day. We're going to catch it, okay? Yeah. Right, they don't want to compete with the Oscars, but guess what? The Oscars is on for four hours and you could rerun it all night long because I needed Shaw's reunion part two and it was not there for me. I was absent last week during the Shaw's discussion and I'm so upset that I missed it and I can't believe I have to wait another week to discuss it because that's like so Persian of you to arrive a week late for the discussion about the Shaw's reunion. Like, home goes got to be on time. Like, you have a lima waiting for your home girl. Did I tell you I saw him at Target and the elevator? I told you guys on Facebook, but I haven't told you in real life. Okay, so you did and you mentioned it on Facebook and you need to you need to explain more here, but you first of all, everybody that's listening, you need to follow the party on Facebook. We are at well, wait, let's talk about Facebook first. We are Facebook.com backslash. Watch what crappins. We are on Twitter at what crappins. You can find me map on Twitter at life on the M list. You can find Ben at B side blog and you can find Ronnie at TV Gasm, but Ronnie please tell us everything and did you really scare Reza and Target go? Yes. Well, I saw this guy who looked like Reza and he was wearing his sunglasses and I was like, well, who else could that be, but Reza? Like, who else looks like him except like the 8 million other persons in West Hollywood? Yeah. But we got in the elevator and there was this other guy in there and he was like, Hey, you on that TV show? Wait, wait, wait, which Target were you at? Because that does not sound like the West Hollywood Target. Oh my God. Are you kidding? West Hollywood Target is like the armpit of West Hollywood. Yeah. Oh, Reza is sniffing it right now. Yeah, it's where all class goes to die and all trainees go to get cashier positions. But anyway, you're like, Hey, you on that TV show? And Reza was like, yeah. Well, you know, I've watched that. I've watched that before. I've seen it sometimes, but I don't know. You know, you go on it though. He was like, I said, that's a person that's a person of you to say that. And he was like, I think the whole elevator experience just scared the crap out of me. I think anything's going to get that fat bastard to take the stairs. It's me and ghetto ass in the elevator. I would have killed for a vine video of that like a second. If I had known that that was going to happen, I would have had my shit ready. But now I'm on an Android phone and getting a video to record takes it's like a five minute process. And are people using vine? I have it, but I have yet to actually like make a little six. It's all the rage kitties. It's all the rage. Fine. What is that? It's six second videos that's associated with Twitter. And they're actually kind of fun and they're really easy to like slap together. And then you can easily do like gifts out of them. It's it's it's it's fun times people. The fact that I'm telling you guys about something technological is ridiculous. Well, you know, it's funny because I'm on vine at B side blog. So everyone come and if if people come and subscribe to my vine, I will make a little movie in honor of this podcast and put on vine PS you did put like on our Facebook page links to your guys's Twitter and my Instagram and my Instagram followers have shot through the roof. Really? Mine might have not shot through the roof. So thanks everyone. Well, by shot through the roof, I mean, I maybe have 15 more, but it's really weird because I put like my private life on there. And I think that you maybe should revert back to my Twitter. Well, if you like your Twitter to be on there instead, we can we can arrange that for you. I have no private life. If I have Instagram, you'd see like cornbread that I made. Yeah, and people who looked at my Instagram see pictures of me eating hot and juicy crawfish, which I was telling Ronnie about before the podcast was amazing. I don't know if anyone will listen to the podcast a few weeks ago when I said I was about to go. Well, I went and hot and juicy crawfish. Damn, you know, that shit is good. Let's stop plugging shit because they don't need us and they're not. Well, and they're not paying us. Let's talk about gossip. Can we talk about gossip? I've got a I've got a I've got a piece that actually goes right from Ronnie's because it's the same sort of sensor world, then we'll go into real gossip, which is that Ronnie may have seen res up. But just yesterday, I saw three bravo liberties right in the neighborhood. Once again, I saw Katie at the gym from Vanderpump Rules and her boyfriend, Tom Sandoval. And I also saw a tall CJ from Top Chef. Yeah. You mean one ball CJ? Yeah, one. Yeah. It looked like a grandfather clock. Did you give him a dirty look? No, because I guess he's it looks like he's in the kitchen at a Tiago, the little coffee shop on Hollywood and La Brea. And I don't want to give him a dirty look if I was actually a patron. Excuse me. He works at a coffee shop on Hollywood and La Brea. I think what I read I think what I read at Eater LA is that he is consulting on their little menu because they have they have like a restaurant component, a small restaurant component. So he looked like he was having a meeting and then he went in the back and was talking, whatever. And I was just like, uh, CJ's gonna ruin this coffee shop. Oh my God, I would have gone in just to wait for them to fire him. Like, that's the best part of CJ's. That's the best part of Top Chef this year is watching CJ get kicked off like three times. It's amazing. He does keep coming back. He's like a cockroach, a very large cockroach, but he's getting stomped on stomped on stomped on. We're getting back to Katie, by the way. So Katie, as we all know, is one of the horse faces from Vanderpump rules. The fact that you're even giving her a name beyond horse one or horse two is very upsetting. She's forced to. Well, she gets a name this week because we have a slightly sympathetic, slightly funny story, which is that someone wrote us and slightly funny. You're terrible. Wait, are we supposed to talk about this? Are we allowed to talk about this? Cause this was a private message sent to our. We just can't use Sammy's name. I mean. It's not Sammy. But anyway, so the story is that horse face number two used to actually be quite stunning. She used to not be a horse face. She probably was like a unicorn face. But then she fell through a ceiling and had to have massive reconstructive surgery and her modeling career hasn't been the same since. So that's something to think about now. Personally, I think her trashy Orange County tattoos might have something to do with that too. I think this is why you shouldn't hang out with poor people because they live in places that have ceilings that fall through. Well, I'm just imagining some like epic scene from Batman. That's all I can do. I only imagine as Katie somehow like being hurtled through a glass ceiling and Batman having to come in and save her. She wishes it was that glamorous. It's more like an episode of like rescue 911 where, you know, they're like on a, you know, it's like kids partying on a on a week balcony in a trashy sorority house. Like she's about to be date rate by Chuck Bass in the season premiere of Gossip Girl. Again, you're making it more glamorous than her life ever was. You're right. You've seen inside of you've seen inside her apartment on Vanderpump Rules. It's a dump. It's probably her own apartment. She probably didn't even get to move. She probably just like put some duct tape on the floor and still lives there. And also, how does falling through a ceiling give you a horse face? Well, if you fall fall on your face, you know, that's how it works. Didn't this person who will go unnamed that wrote us this insider tip to our Facebook page? Do you think that she thought we were going to, you know, be sympathetic because that's not the case? No, I don't think so. I think she's just trying to explain the origins of horse. She was trying to make us feel bad because we put pictures of Katie. And hideous model poses this week on our Facebook page. And I think she was trying to say, look, you guys, I mean, I know you think you're having fun, but this person went through a really rough time. Their friend died and they have a tattoo of the date that their friend died on on her wrist. And she also fell through a ceiling and she used to be beautiful. And you guys really should try and be nicer. Well, again, no, I have to say this, lose a friend dying and falling through a ceiling does not give you a Tyra Bank's five head. But I will say this, though, well, the guilt to clarify her hairline received. That's her guilt increases. But I will say here comes a nice thing for her horse face. Number two, when I saw her at the gym, she looked like she'd lost some weight since the last time I'd seen her. And she looked all right. She looked all right for her. How could she is girls? No, not bad. They were. They were in. No, no, no, no, you're right. She's not fat, but these these stupid bitches are talking like they're freaking models. And for models, they are overweight. They actually are overweight for models. I'm sorry. That's the truth. And I love to have you to be bed, bath and beyond models, which is basically what they are. I mean, let's be honest. Um, and if they were if they were models, they wouldn't be working at a sir. Okay, they'd be booking jobs like Laura Lee. Super stuff. Yeah. Well, so here's the thing though. You know, these pictures that we put up of the models this week, I think those were mainly my doing because when I heard that Katie used to be a stunner, I tried to look up some images of her. I think I found one where I could see how at one point she probably was like crazy hot. I could actually see that. But then it, but it was even better because it led us to that amazing photo of Kristin that's on our Facebook page, which if you guys are not liking our page, here's a great reason to like it. Because you can see this picture. Which one is which this horse is number two? Horse face number two is the one that's not Kristin. Wait, which one is Kristin? Which one is Kristin? Kristin is the guy that we put up a picture of where she's wearing like a sort of like a like an Asian style, like top up to her. So she's money fell through the roof right or whatever. She's she's naturally phoned. Oh, I was going to say you cannot blame that all on floorboards. Excuse me. Can we please put that on a t-shirt? She has naturally fallen through the roof. She's been broken in by genetics, not by a feeling. She fell through God's roof. She fell through God's roof. And that's what it is. And a few things coming out of the uterus. Oh, wait, we're talking about the other bitch. That girl doesn't look like she sees ugly anyway. I mean, yes, we call her horse face to be nice because she thinks she's a model, but that girl's pretty. I mean, she's slightly cross-eyed and like cabbage patch faced, but she's still pretty. You're talking most people. Wait, are you talking about Katie or Kristin? I don't know the prettier one out of the two. Well, I mean, one of them is just not one of them just looks like, did you guys watch Walking Dead? Last night, Andrea, Sunday night, Andrea was trying to disfigure a zombie. So she cut off its arms and like knocked all of its teeth out with a stone. That's what that girl looks like. Kristin is the one who said everyone who works, everyone who works at Vanderbilt, everyone who works at Sur is just really good looking or some like. And she is never going to live that down. Yeah, the tall skinny one who's a drama queen who became who made up with Stasi in the finale. Exactly. She's horse face number one. Oh, so she's she's okay. So she's never fallen through. Well, the other girl's pretty. I don't want any excuses about her. I mean, give me a break. No, the other girl. I'm telling you, I think I said a few weeks ago when I first saw her in person, the other girl, she's cute. She's not the way that she says she's a model. No, she's like a Ben and Jerry's model. Horse face number one, though, I've seen her in person now. Also, I saw them both walking together into the gym and horse face number one, you know, her face is she's got a horse face, you know, I'd like she if look, if you were in Boise, Idaho and you walked into a bar and she was there. Yeah, she should be like smoking. Yeah, she's she's a model for Boise, Idaho is what you're saying. Yeah, she's a Boise 10. But in LA, she's just like a seven, you know, she's got a good body, but she's got stupid tattoos on her paws. I don't think that she has a good body. Look, you know, I'm not into chicks, but these women look like they are planks of plywood with no curves, no nothing going on. Look, we saw them in bathing suits this week. There's nothing going. Stasi actually has the body. Stasi does have the body, but but Kristen, though, has like as like a model body where you want where they always like someone who's like, just basically like a Tim Burton's like, man before speaker. Like, stop that. She's a little Tim Burton. She's Jack Skellington or whatever his name is. I want to make it clear to the audience that we're not only being sexist, we're also just rebelling against homely people who call themselves models and try and rub their things in your face. Yeah. If she had never said, if she had never said anything like that, we would not have been spending the past 15 minutes talking about it. And we will get to Vanderpump rules in a bit, but this is why I secretly am liking the show because it gets me so impassioned. Like, I actually have real opinions on this show that it comes out of me, that vomit out of me. Okay, well, we'll get to that in a second. Let's get on with some more gossip. Matt, what you got, Boo? Season 16, Dancing with the Stars. Lisa Vanderpump is officially announced today as a new cast member and she has a new hot boy dancer that has paired with her. And I kind of just want to get your guys opinions. Do you think that anybody thinks that this woman has a chance at going far? She seems to have a stick up her ass on the show and we love her, but I cannot imagine her dancing. She doesn't even have sex. If you can't have sex, you can't dance. That's my opinion. Oh, she has a lot of sex. With who? Yeah, I mean, she makes those jokes that she doesn't have sex, but she has a lot of sex she gave her husband a handjob in the hospital. Okay, so here's the thing. Speaking of handjobs in the hospital, I think that this has nothing to do with handjobs in the hospital whatsoever. But I think she'll make it a few weeks in and then that's it. Because in certain ways, I think her her stiff British qualities will be very regal on the dance floor. But I think that she's not I can't see a piece of being limber. Look, the names that they cast this year are not that big. I mean, if she goes out before Andy Dick, that's a serious problem. But I mean, her biggest competition is Winona Judd, literally the biggest competition. And then maybe Kelly Pickler and one of those like gymnast girls from the Olympics. But you know, I'm glad that Lisa's on the show. I think it's hilarious. She's posing with a jiggy in all of the press shots. Her partner is hot as F and put it on Facebook. I will. I totally put them on Facebook tonight. And then any excuse to get Brandy in the audience with Ken and Jiggy, I'm all for it. I'm actually going to have to watch Dancing with the Stars now, which disgusts me. Well, you can tell me about that because I'm not watching that shit. I'm a little concerned for the safety of Jiggy with Winona Ryder. I mean, Winona Judd walking around with Winona Ryder. I was going to say Winona Ryder would steal him. No kidding, especially if there's a bottle of ketchup on the craft services table. That's just an appetizer. You know, Winona Judd, okay, I'm just since we've already been totally sexist, I'm just going to be obnoxious now. Winona Judd on Dancing with the Stars reminds me of remember when you'd play Super Mario Brothers 3 and like one of those Bowser's, they would jump up and when they land, the ground was shake and Mario couldn't move. I feel like that's what Winona would be like. Oh my god. I actually think that, well, so Maxim Chemerov, Chemerov, Koski, whatever the hot dude Maxim, he max he quit today unexpectedly. And I think it's because they paired him with Winona. And he was like, I already had to lift that fat bitch, Kirsty Alley's ass up. I'm not going to, well, I'm not willing to hurt my back again. I quit. Well, didn't Winona actually lose a lot of weight? Didn't she tell Oprah that she spent like, she spent all her time like walking around the woods thinking about things and it caused her to lose weight? No, that was Mindy McCrady. She would have made, she would have done great on that show. That would have saved her life, not celebrity rehab. Well, she lost weight on her deathbed, that's for sure. How much does the human brain weigh again? And I thought I was a terrible person. Everybody sent your email to Ronnie at TVGASM. Well, what I'm glad about it. You can tell when we're being tongue in cheek and that we are not as obnoxious as we sound. Oh my God. Yes, we are. That's pretty bad. Okay, so Lisa, I'm excited for her. I think she was going to go far. Maxim can suck it. And I think that it's going to be very funny to watch him try and make it in the world because he's only really got an ass. His face is already kind of falling and he's no julienne huff. Okay, so let's see where you end up. Maxim, how dare you quit? I heard that he quit because of salary because they're getting paid like a hundred thousand dollars a year and he thinks he deserves more. He deserves more. But you know what though, do people really tune in for the dancers, people tune in for the celebrities who care, they're replaceable. Like Beyonce, I would say. Yeah, replaceable. What's different from Beyonce? Now, excuse me, if you were being Beyonce, you should lip sync, not really sing because she can't. How dare you. And look, you said nothing about Katharine C to Jones lip syncing at the Oscars team. Kelly Rowland. I'm speaking of the Oscars. Matt, is there another piece of gossip you like to show? Yes, there is. I did post this. This is actually our current cover photo on Facebook. By the time you guys hear this podcast, it may no longer be the case, but Brandy Glanville caused a major stir. She was on the red carpet at the Oscars and her chest was hanging out. I mean, if you take like the biggest plunging v-neck gown and then you multiply it with like a Jessica Rabbit dress, I mean, Brandy was on, you know, it was almost borderline offensive. Some people are like, if you got it, flaunt it, I'm like, first of all, how did this bitch get invited to the Oscars? Put your tits away. Well, apparently it was also her self-designed dress. Like, I guess she's becoming yet another housewife who's going to be launching her own line. And so she actually designed her own stupid dress. I'm sure it will be as successful as Lexus Belino Coacher. Oh, I hope so. And by the way, thank you to whichever one of you posted the link to the Yahoo article about Brandy Glanville on that. That was me. That was me. Thank you. What's synergy? We did a blog post on Oscars about Brandy Glanville and oh, let me tell you this. So, you know, Oscars, I, you know, have to deal with all that crap. But the highest clicking thing off of the Yahoo homepage that day was the Brandy Glanville blog. It had a higher click-through rate than any other piece of Oscars content all weekend. Because of that dress? Because of the dress. Wow. She knows how to work it. Where was Leanne Rhimes's click-throughs, huh? Well, she just bought a new house with Eddie Sibrian in, what's this neighborhood? What's Hidden Hills? Where is that? You mean for Eddie Sibrian? For Eddie Sibrian Hills, I think is as Deep Valley. Oh, by the way, I think I have someone posted on the site or somewhere I saw a headline that there's rumors that they want Leanne Rhimes to be on the next season of Beverly Hills. Did we hear that? Did we hear that? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That is a brand-new thing that she can't do it. And one of the best things about that was that Brandy was like, I would love that. I think that would be great. Yeah, I would love it too. Let me tell you something. I would love that. If Bravo is smart, they will pay Leanne Rhimes whatever it takes to get her on the show. Because again, with Taylor and Adrienne halfway out the door, that would be the addition that everybody would kill for. Yeah, you know what they could pair in bottles of Jack and Coke. Jack and cocaine. Yeah, that's what I mean. Like, not Jack and sort of like a bottle that's half full of whiskey, half full of cocaine, give it to Leanne Rhimes and she'll be there. Yeah, I would love that. And they're going to have to come up with something for Brandy to do because Adrienne's not going to be there. And honestly, she doesn't do anything else. I mean, what else has she done all year except talk about dicks? Yeah, yeah, exactly. Well, why don't we start talking about our real house as a Beverly Hills then? Okay. Look, well, how everything's just flowing so smoothly from one subject to the deck? Do you think anybody is still listening to us after that, after our opening like 20 minutes of nothing? Probably not. I think they are. I like talking to the void. I think my arch, my arch nemesis, Eddie probably is. He's now following me. He sent me a message on Instagram. He's like, now I'm following you on Instagram. Please give me another shout out. So there you go, Eddie. But you are never going to work. I actually think now that people are going to start stalking me through the Instagram and it might be dangerous. Well, Eddie already is. He's got a love hate with you, right? No, Eddie. I like, I like Eddie too. Because he even came onto one of my YouTube Real Housewives redubs and commented about how much Matt hates him. Oh, he keeps posting on our iTunes page, which you guys should go to and leave us comments to. He keeps posting on there too, that like, he doesn't really hate me. But that I think means that he wants to skin me and wear me. You know what? Well, Ben actually got some attitude this week too. I did. It's pretty fun. Yeah, someone said, I forgot your name. I'm so cute. Did they say something about that Ben talks over me back when we first started the podcast? No, it was a sticking point. Excuse me, Matt, you talk over me now all the time. Right. I mean, the tide has turned. The tide has turned. No, it says something like, you know, thanks for posting the podcast. Now we can listen to Ben name drop some more. You're welcome. I love it. I actually love it because it's not at me yet. Just just doing your funny voices and you will main out of the line of target and the line of fire, it'll just be me and Ben with 95% of it. You know, it's our voices because it's mostly Ben. I'm usually just someone going. But you know what's sad? I'm getting called out for name dropping and the names I'm dropping are like Katie and Kristen from Vanderpump Rules. Like, that's pathetic. Yeah, it's really pathetic because it's like, it's called our neighborhood and they all just happen to live around us. Yeah, we need to fucking move on the world. At least like, let me like name drop some big celebrities, not that I've seen any, but let me name drop some big celebrities that way. It's like worth it. But man, Abraham is loving Eve. That's Murray Abraham is loving needs. Okay, so let's move on to Beverly Hills. We're going to be here all night. Okay. So Beverly Hills opened with, I don't even remember, but they went to Paris and came got drunk. Oh, you know, go don't jump ahead. No, it opened with the here's how it speaking of drunkenness. The the Richard sisters came together for like a secret cabal and they decided that they were going to have a like, no, wait, before they decided anything. How is that house still standing? Because if my house looked like that, I would have it burnt down. That looked like my me most living room with American flags everywhere. And okay, excuse me, we cannot move on until we talk about the turtle shells. Oh my god. Turtle shells, you guys. And I even made a Mario show my plan. Mario jumps on turtle shells to kill his enemies. And I did that for Ben. Nice call back. Can you stop talking about it unless you're going to talk about it with Kim voice? Thanks. Well, I just read about it in my recap. So I feel bad quoting my own recap. Oh, let's post another one of those to our faces. Well, here's what I like to act. I get paid and I get paid and recap posting links. Okay. All right, I think we've all said something catty to all of each other. We can now move on. We've each had a catty remark to each it's out of it's out of my system. It's out of my system. I'm ready to go. Here's what I put. Hey, my friend Mario jump on a turtle shell and slide it real fast to kill mushrooms. That guy is amazing to really hairy. And I never understand what he's talking about. Accent his brother to I think they're twins, but they never wear the same outfit. That's what I did if I had a twin. Unless I was your twin talk because those blue pants are really not going to work for me. Hey Kyle, you're sitting on your dog Kyle. He needs a shell. Get it. You know, when what Kim walked into that living room, what I love is that she looks out the window and she's like, and then she's like, you know, the one thing that I really miss about my old house, I thought she could say like, what's the beautiful view? And she's like, she's like, it's just nice having a place to sit. I don't have a place to sit and live in. I'm like, it's yourself a couch. Yeah. All the picture frames and make a couch. She's so busy standing in her dining room that doesn't have a dining room table or dining room chairs making chicken salad with her talons. Really, she could sit in the living room. She's replaced all seating with a conveyor belt for her chicken. I love your outside. I wish I had a couch like this in my living room. Didn't I think that she was about to go in and say something about like, I wish I still had a house until Maurice stole it. Maurice, I'm obsessed with her being the only person to call him Maurice. It is my favorite thing of the entire show. I feel like it's actually even gone away. Like, I feel like that's why we need Kim to be drunk again so she can call him Maurice Moore. Well, we got that wish. Yeah. Fast forward. Okay. So Kim, you know, Kim has that issue where whenever you make a life change, you think that everybody else has to make life change. Such as Oprah, I've lost weight. Now everybody has to lose weight. Exactly. I understand that. Look, I've lost a little weight. I've not lost very much weight, but when I lost a little bit of weight, everybody I saw was like, oh my God, learn to control yourself. Like in my mind. And of course, like a week later, I've gained 30 pounds. Jesus Christ. But yeah, that's how Kim is being. She's like, I haven't had a drink for three days, so now Taylor's an alcoholic. Yeah. Well, I mean, Taylor is an alcoholic. Taylor is an alcoholic. Yeah, totally. She did lose her daughter, you know. Yeah. Yeah. She's, she's an alcoholic. I'm not disagreeing with that. It's just, you know, it needs to be called out by someone who didn't just like snort their viking in. Yeah. Yeah. I would agree. I would agree in that part. Okay. Well, did you guys think like before they went over to Taylor's mansion, which I'm sure is about to be foreclosed on any second, that it seemed like Kyle wasn't too sure that she wanted to be part of this. And again, I just feel like, you know, Kyle hemming and hawing, but then, you know, she got dragged there. You know, did she want to or does she just want kind of to let Taylor off the hook? Because I feel like she lets Taylor off the hook constantly. She does. I mean, she's, she's from a family of alcoholics. So yeah, she's used to enabling us. What I do, I mean, look, I break up with people. I break up with friends who go to AA. I will not have that. If I can't enable you in some way, we have no friendship future. You know, Kyle is a, is a bullshit. You know, she out. Sorry, that was a false statement. I just needed a second. I only need to be different friends who go to AAA because I like people who are reckless on the road. Well, look, if we became friends while you were in alcoholic, that's the friend that I became friends with. I don't want to be friends with sober you. I don't know them. And I most likely won't like them. That's what I'm trying to say. Does that make more sense? That's good. Actually, that makes total sense. You know, it's a good message. Like, if you have a drinking problem, like, don't get it fixed because you lose, you'll lose all your friends. So right, like, I was friends with you in high school when you were fun and partying. And now that you're married with three kids and you're obnoxious and all you do is post baby photos on Facebook. Fuck you, friends. I don't want to be friends with you. Yeah, boring. I'm boring. Oh boy. So it's speaking of like alcoholic tendencies and everything. You know, what I hated was there was a scene when Kyle was talking to Kim. I think they were at the airport later on. And Kyle was like, so what were some of your tricks and Kim's like, well, why am I coffee cup? And then like, Kyle was like, I knew it all. I knew everything you were doing. No, you didn't. You did not know it all because you just had to ask her what she was doing. Don't act like you were always aware all this time. You did not know anything. She didn't know anything. But you know what? I was taking notes. I was like, Oh, if I put wine in my coffee mug at work, and if I just pretend to blow on it, like it's hot wine, boom, I'm in. Well, that was the best part of that one. She's like, Oh, so you put you put one in your coffee cup. And that's why you're always blowing on it. She's like, I didn't blow on the coffee cup. I didn't blow on the wine. I didn't do that. I mean, come on. Yeah, I know. Like, like, come on. Like, she's not a crazy woman. She only puts wine on the coffee cup. Like she's like, I'm not, you know, being method about it. Meanwhile, why does she ever think that she could get away with it? It's not like if you drink wine instead of coffee, people can tell the difference between wine, breath and coffee, breath. Well, her teeth are rotted out anyway. So whether they were brown or a little red stained, I mean, she's like, she does have, I call it turtle juice. And what I do is I put my cup under a turtle shell and I press turtle shell and sometimes purple comes out and sometimes white comes out and sometimes pink comes out. But I like the purple one the most. How funny was it when she is telling Kyle, she's like, Oh, no, let's just get to the point where she's in the room with Taylor and she's like, I can see that you're embarrassing your children the way I embarrassed my children. Um, you have no idea how much you embarrassed your children. You have no clue. Well, you can remember that shit because even when you watch the episodes, your house was drunk. Well, you could see that's why Taylor's eyes wide and she's like, wait a second, I'm as bad as you. I'm getting schooled by this woman. Also, Taylor, you know, I just find Taylor to be so hilarious lately and normally I just hate her guts, but her reaction to it was so funny. She's like, well, no tears. Like, and you could see her trying to switch it on so hard, but she wanted to laugh at the same time so she couldn't exactly saw. But once she was probably stabbing a nail into her thigh trying to make a tear pop out. Well, you know, having to explain to my daughter, why daddy isn't here anymore, please, you think that your daughter doesn't know how to work the internet on the iPhone that I'm sure she has. Come on. And by the way, um, major props, perhaps an Emmy is deserved for the editors who when Kim was like, I think you have a problem and they cut to this montage of Taylor, like swilling wine and being drunk. They also cut to my favorite real housewife moment of Taylor in a Louis Vuitton suitcase at Bill Chateau going, that was honestly like that little sequence alone, maybe the entire hour worth it. Taylor in that suitcase, I'm telling you, I just need to start making top 10 list, but that is a top 10 Taylor moment is a great moment. There's so many great Taylor moments. And that was one of them. Oh, the ad for the episode or like last week on Beverly Hills. And it was just like her doing panty list cartwheels. I was like, Oh, here we go. They decided to bring that back. Oh, who's got to love it. That was the best montage ever. Yeah, it was fantastic. So anyway, so do you think? Well, I was going to, sorry, Ben, I'm going to talk over you one more time. You know, we have a new show starting on Bravo next week called LA Shrinks. But part of me, instead of them green lighting crap like that, would prefer either a buddy cop show with the Richard sisters where they go and do interventions for ladies in Beverly Hills or, you know, I don't know, but I feel like there's something there. You know, I always thought LA Shrinks was a show about the city getting really small. Okay, but if Lisa Vanderpump can get a spin off, it's time for our for Kim Richards to get a spin off. Oh, yeah, I agree. So then Mima, so finally, after this intervention, I shut me down. Well, we have we have to move on. We can only talk about this for so long. But so then we moved over to Mohammed's new house, which we've been seeing renovated for like over two different television shows from shows by family, by family, who no longer a cast member, but his fedora still is. Yes. So the house is finally done. So Yolanda naturally decided to throw a house for me. I think it's very important for every young woman to have a house for me for the ex-husband. It just makes you feel more loved. So she invited everyone over and there everyone realized that they were going to France coincidentally. And from there, the big Parisian trip was born. Did anything funny happen at this party? Oh wait, Yolanda confronted Taylor. I was like, you know, I can't help but you know, people keep telling me that you have some sort of problem with me. Is there anything you want to tell me? Same with a very black and white person. You know, there could be nothing would make me want to be less honest than Yolanda confronting me. I would just want to be like, no, no, nothing wrong, nothing wrong. I'll go now. Well, I think that I'm wondering about the timeline on the show. Like, when the show started airing, did it start airing after everything was already taped? I don't think so because I read that they just did Lisa's wedding renewal or whatever her vowel renewal vowel, her vowel renewal ceremony a couple of weeks ago. So I'm not sure but I have a feeling that this was taped a hundred years ago? Well, no, they couldn't have because they showed Paris in the opening, the opening coming this season clips. But it just seems like I read that article somebody posted on our Facebook about it was a Kyle, an interview with Kyle, and she was saying that her only real friend out of all the ladies is Taylor and everyone else, you know, like she may have seemed like she was kissing Adrian's butt but they're not even close and they haven't even talked, you know, for ages. And I just, oh, and that Yolanda is being mean to her own blogs because everyone's calling Yolanda boring, you know, all over the internet. So now the Yolanda is trying to be relevant by being mean on the blogs. And so I'm wondering if this was all taped after Yolanda found out that she was really boring and now she's trying to be interesting because Yolanda hasn't been, she hasn't done shit, she hasn't been confrontational at all, has she? Do you not listen to last week's podcast? Because there was a segment called Matt talks shit about Ronnie who said that Yolanda was going to be an amazing addition to this cast and we're still waiting. Ben would agree with me. Ryan Reynolds here from In Mobile. With the price of just about everything going up during inflation, we thought we'd bring our prices down. So to help us, we brought in a reverse auctioneer, which is apparently a thing. Mid mobile unlimited premium wireless. Get 30, 30, 30, get 30, get 20, 20, 20, get 20, get 20, get 20, get 15, 15, 15, just 15 bucks a month. So give it a try at midmobile.com/switch. $45 up from payment equivalent to $15 per month, new customers on first three month plan only, taxes and fees extra, speeds lower above 40 gigabyte detail. Credit Karma is your evolved financial assistant, making managing your finances simpler and more tailored to you. Join us at credit karma.com to start your personalized financial journey today and continue to grow with our innovations. Credit Karma evolve your finances. Yeah, I'm not sure. We only have like two or three weeks left Ronnie of this show and it's only episode 15 and they're going to 22, right? Real housewives. Real housewives of Orange County comes back on April 1st. But isn't that the replacement for Atlanta? They said Monday April 1st. Maybe I'm wrong. Let me look at my calendar. This is emergency. But didn't Atlanta start before Beverly Hills? They started the same week. Hold on. I'm looking everyone. I'm looking very important. April 1st is a Monday. So unless they move things around or whatever, then it looks like we probably only have like two more weeks and then two or three more weeks and then the reunions. But I could be wrong. They're going to keep milking this crap, you know. I mean, the fact that now Vanderpump is getting reunion shows, Shaz is getting multiple reunion shows. This, you know, it'll never end. It'll be summer before the Beverly Hills ladies are off TV. Yeah, that's true too. So they went to Paris. Well, Lisa went to Santropay first to- Let's talk about that. Yeah, let's talk about that. So Ken has a son who is 45 but looks really young and he's married to a woman who was Lisa's friend and she looks really old. The sun kind of looks like the guy that was in Blue Lagoon. Oh, yeah, I could see that. Who was that guy? I don't know. Was it Mark Ham? It was Ken's son. It was Ken's son. Anyway, Ken is a grandfather. We know Ken's in his 60s. We know Lisa's 50. So Ken doesn't even know how old he was when he had a son because he was that drunk. He was either 1920 or 21. No, because he's trying to cover Lisa's lives about her age and he can't do the math fast. Oh, Lisa's 50. Anyway. No way is Lisa 50. There is no way in hell that Lisa is 50. You think she's older? Yes. Lisa's late 50s if she's a day. No, she says. I think her Wikipedia says she's 49 and Wikipedia is the truth. 49. Look, that girl is not 49 or plastic surgery, fillers, Botox, and vitamins are all the waste of time. The point is this. She looks a lot better than that old HAG friend of hers. Well, that's true. That one looked like that Muppet Janis mixed with who's that with Betsy Johnson and then her face got hit with a sledgehammer and then that's what you get. Apparently that was too mean for Ronnie. He's just silent. Sorry, I was texting. I was texting. I was texting. Well, well, look, so they were sort of in San Tropez, which looked beautiful and amazing. glamorous. Did you I wanted to be on the beach with them drinking rosé with jiggy. Okay. I did too. And okay, by the way, whoever hated me for name dropping here comes a location drop location drop. I went to I went to San Tropez like four and a half years ago for like I was like, I did it all wrong. And I went to that beach and it was cold and miserable. And the and the sand was like shards of glass and it was terrible. And seeing that made me so sad that I did it that that I missed out on the proper San Tropez experience. That's my obnoxious comments of the podcast. I never go anyplace. And I don't know if any place or do anything that whole segment you guys were like, Oh, that's so dreamy. I was like, this is boring. I want that old lady to fight with Lisa or I want like someone to get hit by something that was boring. I don't want to watch Lisa just traveling around doing nothing. That's boring. I did like that when they got to their their house, which by the way, was a ridiculous mansion also that she was like, apparently you can just throw little dogs on planes and take them into France. And it's not an issue. Yeah, America is the only country that's such a pain in the ass. Like, Oh, okay. You try and come and I don't know. Oh, yeah. Oh, they are. Yeah, you date or so like stretch about things coming in, things going out. Well, America takes pictures of like running on the plane. Oh, big burn. Hey, girl. So see, we're even becoming born talking about Lisa. So what else happened on this bullshit episode? Let's get past it. So anyway, they all they all went to Paris and like really, except for Marissa Zanuck. Yeah, because her father in law died, spoiler alert by the Oscars the night before. Am I the only person that was like jealous of Marissa? I mean, that's a lot of inheritance. Maybe she can finally get a better house. Old people died. Let's all find the silver lining, paddle on the back and hope for a check. Because she and Kim and Brandy Glanville all live in that same track house on the same block. Did you guys notice, by the way, that Melissa McCarthy at the Oscars had Marissa Zanuck's mom's hairstyle? Yes. Anyone? Anyone notice that? Oh, it's not it's not a compliment. No, I love it. I love that hairstyle. Imagine that hairstyle with Kim's blousey bow top. That would be a deadly combo. Oh, my God. Imagine Kim starring in hairspray. That's what it would look like. Oh, my God. Mama told me not to use it. So, um, yeah, Marissa's dad died and then they or dad in law died and then they all went to Paris. How convenient. Such a coincidence that they were just all happening to go to Paris. All over flying air to Haiti to Paris, which, of course, everyone flies that to get to Paris. Oh, yeah. Air Tahiti Nui. Yeah. Like, oh, guys, I want to go to Paris. So, uh, I see that flying air France or American, but you know what? Let's fly air Tahiti. That makes sense. Let's do that instead. Um, well, are they going to go to Disneyland? Cause so far, the only great thing that's happening is that Kim's falling off the wagon and I feel horrible for loving that she's drunk. Like, that's horrible. It was amazing. I like that. Um, it looked, by the way, Paris looked so beautiful. It looked so pretty there. I've never been to Paris in the summer. I bet it's just like the most amazing thing. I said as if I'm like a regular going to Paris. I'm not a Paris retailer, by the way. But I'm just saying, like, it just looked so pretty and to see these people there, I almost felt like it wasn't fair. That these people, they go and they are obnoxious on the balcony of like the best hotel in the city. And we're sitting on our couches podcasting. That's why I have so much anger towards all of these shows. I'm like, why do they deserve it? Why not? It's Bastille Day because that's when they were there. July, July 14th. Okay. So we're that far off from taping to airing on TV. Wow. So maybe, maybe we should save up some money and go to, um, Paris for Bastille Day this year and pretend we're the real housewives. Oh, hell no. I'm not. I'm going to know Paris. Ronnie, you're the one that's just, you were the one just complaining about you, never go anywhere. Come on. Let's do it. Well, I'm pretending that I don't want to because it's easier. It's easier to deal with and not being able to afford it. We can just go to, yeah, just go to Vegas, go to the casino. It'll be good enough. I don't want a boyfriend because I can't get one. I don't want to go to Paris because I can't afford to. So basically nothing happened. Nothing happened on the strip to Paris, right? Kim's way. Yeah, but they said it's part one. So I guess next week we get to see, well, at least we get to see Ken in a helmet and on one of those like, uh, bicycle things that you stand on, whatever the hell those things are called. I'll say we'll move her a segue. Oh, segue. Yeah. Yeah. We get to see them on a people move. What's up people? Is that people move for a thing in the airport? Yeah, that would be more exciting than we normally see from Canada. He's on a surface that's moving very slowly. He's not feeding swans. Oh my god. Do all these people have swans? I know. Everyone has swans. Well, I love that it was. Oh, I'm so glad that black swans are getting along with the white swans now. Like there's even race, relation, trouble in the swan world. I know. Well, I just, I just think it's funny that these people are making statements about society through their swans and not even realizing it. Like she was literally talking about the swans. So let's move on to, what else was on this week? We'll talk a little bit to the later. Vanderpump rules. Vanderpump rules. What's she talking about? It was the season finale of Vanderpump rules and, um, once again, like my blood was boiling. Like these people are like the worst people on television. They are like Stasi is beyond, beyond, beyond awful. Um, so the episode opened up with Stasi and Jax are sort of like back together and, uh, at the puppy store on Fairfax, right down the street from us. That's right. And she has, I mean, not named Rob about bark and bitches, but we've walked by it. Um, they charge you like $700 to an adopt, uh, like a 10 year old pit bull. Um, so, uh, nipples hanging down to the floor. Thanks a lot, bark and bitches. You do a lot of business there. Well, I would rather go, yeah, never mind. So it was, it was back to the usual bullshit. Stasi was saying things like, Hey, back. Sorry. I'm sorry. Go ahead. So Stasi was up to the, her usual things saying like to Jax, like you let the dog get fat and you didn't like change his collar and you didn't feed him properly. And he's like, I'll do anything like I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I mean, they, they cannot be more awful if they tried. I think last, did we last week compare her to Hitler? I don't remember. Did we do that? Yes. Yes. We did. Well, this week, it's pulpot. I mean, she is just the worst ever. She is the worst thing. Okay. What is it? I was just going to say, like, I used to be like her in the sense that I would, in my early to mid 20s, I'd be one of those people who would like get pissy at somebody. And all I would want is for them to apologize. And then I would just ice them out and like, that's exactly what she's doing to Kristen. It's what she did to Jax and still probably is doing to Jax where it's like, you know, you're in the power position, even though you're the ass, you're really the main asshole. And it's just like, you just want these people to say, I would do anything for you. And then you still deny them. It's like, I want to be invited to every party just so I can RSVP. No, thanks. So basically what you're saying is that you're really passive aggressive. I'm just saying that people don't change ever. I'm just saying that Eddie McGee, I'm just saying that Eddie McGee hates me for a good, good reason. But I have, I have turned over a new leaf and I'm no longer like Stasi. Yeah. So Eddie, don't give him a Facebook friend request because he's going to decline you and it'll make him so happy. Yeah, you need to not talk about him for a couple of weeks and he will be barking up your tree. He is getting too fast. Well, I thought the funniest thing about it was that Stasi cried 30 times in this episode. And but she actually has real tears come out. Yes. Well, she believes her own bullshit, which is, which is so wonderful about her. Like she really doesn't get that she's a hideous, horrible human being. And they even showed clips of the reunion show, which is so sad that this is getting a reunion, but they showed clips to that. And even in that, she's sobbing and saying, and you made everyone hate me. Now everyone hates me. Honey, your timeline is all fucked up. People don't hate you because of jacks. They hate you because you're an asshole. You are the whole of an ass. You're an asshole's asshole. Yeah, I'm literally like, we have, we have a horse, we have a, we have horse faces on one end. We have asshole on the other together. They all just make one giant stupid mule, you know, floppy mule hole. Well, so here's the thing, when you talk about Stasi crying, I mean, that gets the crux of it, which is that the big revelation in all this is after several weeks of denying all this stuff. Jack's who we found out is a liar on all sorts of plays. Please, please refer to him as Jason Jason, his real name. He finally admitted, yes, he did have relations with a girl in Vegas. And so Stasi starts to ball and cry. And if we were living in a vacuum, if this is all we had ever seen, it would make sense. She should cry because this is not something you ever want to hear. It's devastating. And yet she's crying and you can't even feel sympathy for it. So you're just like that stupid fucking bitch. And then when she's sitting there and she's going, what did I ever do to deserve this? What did I do? Like, I'll tell you what you did. You were just like a hideous, hideous bitch. You were an evil person. You were someone, one of the most despicable people in the history of the planet earth, like worse than any of the worst dinosaurs, you know? She she does not deserve to be loved. I mean, I would, I would, I would, I don't like to say horrible things about people all the time, but about her, like, she is one of those people in this world that does not deserve to be loved because she is so disgusting. She does not. People like whenever your friend gets cheated on, it's always the guy's fault, no matter what the girl did. But in this case, it's like you, here's what you did. You were so horrible that you forced him and his broke ass to fill up his gas tank to drive all the way to Vegas to impregnate a porn star. That's how bad you were. Like, most guys could get in a fight and go jog around, you know, jog around the block. You drove him to fuck and impregnate a porn star. Do you know how poorly that could have turned out? That was all on your head, Stacey. And also, I'd like to say that she's so full of shit in her timeline. Oh, I said that about Jackson and then now I look bad. No, honey, you were cheating on Jack's first without fucking bartender Frank and basically admitted it on national TV. Then you broke up with Jack's and then all this other stuff happened. So don't act like all of this happened because of Jack's. All of that stuff with your friend started happening way before the stripper and the porn star stuff happening happened. You are an asshole, donkey, mule, hole, sloppy, mule, hole. There's no, the thing is, there's just no one to root for. They're all just awful because she's hideous like that. Jack's is an asshole for doing her lying and dating. Why is he the asshole? Like, because he wears eyebrow, he wears eyebrow makeup. If there's anybody to root for, it is him. And I feel disgusting, but I posted this on my Instagram last night and Ben is giving me shit for it on Instagram. But look, anybody that has to put up with Stassi deserves a, you know, a tiny sign up for that shit. He signed up for that. No, yeah. And not only that, he gets free rent. He's only staying with Stassi because he, she pays for everything. I mean, they, he's acknowledged that on TV. Excuse me. Excuse me. Can the two of you just realize that we need to give him a little bit of love because that body is sick? No, like, it's literally sick with swords and warts and chlamydia and gonorrhea. The guy, the guy with the best body is the busboy who's shoved off into the background and he has a slamming body. You know what I'm talking about? You have a butter face. What that butter off your face. He's got a cute, like sort of Filipino face going on. He's got a slippery face because there's so much butter on it. I don't think there's any butter. No butter. I think butter face. It's March. It's margarine. It's got an earth balance. Jack's deserves no pity. And his whole, I love the way that he's trying to dig himself out of this hole is that he's a victim because he had to become a compulsive liar because he was so embarrassed about not finishing college that he lied about finishing college and then changed his name from Jason to Jack's. And even though the shrink was looking at him like, look, I'm only getting like SAG minimum for being here. I don't have to take this bullshit. You lying to me. I mean, come on, you're a man. You're a full grown man in eyebrow makeup. And the biggest secret is that you've changed your name to Jack's. Come on. I know. Well, welcome to L.A. But I love Jack's is that he became a compulsive liar because he was an idiot and he's an idiot because he's a compulsive liar. It's so fascinating. A poor guy. You know, he's one of those people that could have gotten lucky when they were younger and then pregnant somebody who actually kept the baby and forced him to pay like a certain amount of child support. And that would have forced some kind of responsibility on him. But unfortunately, he's always relied on a decent body and his stupidity has gotten him nowhere. And he's never going to get anywhere. He looks good in a black speedo. Don't forget that he is the third horse face. Yeah, he is the third horse face. I think he looks more like a hound dog, personally. But what was I going to say about? Well, we'll talk about the speedo. So one of the things that happened was that there was a photo shoot. Sexy, unique restaurant photo shoot. A sore. Yeah, because, because you know what, when I want to go out for a nice salmon dinner, I want to think about Stassi's wet dripping. Yeah. On a on a on a card that's sitting on my table before I'm waiting for my salmon to arrive. Well, so what here's what cracked me up was that I think it was Katie or someone said something along the lines of like, you know, what's really great about working at Sir is that like one moment you're waiting on tables. And the next you're doing a photo shoot for the for the restaurant. And it's like, you know, you know, who else does photo shoots for the places that they work? Every fricking go-go dancer in West Hollywood. There's nothing special. Yeah, or or or Jared from Subway. Yeah. Yeah. This is not Anna went toward the not just someone you city to the foot. That's not the way it works. You're wearing the same bikini. You're wearing the same bikini that the girl on the elephant rhino billboards is wearing. Okay, man, shut up. Yeah, just because your boss said, come over to the house, get into bikini and pose in my pool. That does not make you a fashion star. Also, we need to give Lisa a little bit of shit here. What is wrong with her? I'm getting kind of offended by her. Well, you know, darling, all the way to all the way stuff here has to be gorgeous, you know, says about gorgeous people. Like shut the fuck up. Why don't you try and make a few decent appetizers and cleansing the purses out of there. Bitch. Well, I know it's. Give me a word. Give me my damn drink. The Lisa thing is funny because, you know, it was very jarring personally to watch, you see Lisa in San Tropez with her European family, then they go to Paris and very sophisticated, very worldly. And then she slums it. Then, yeah, then the next cuts the next hour and she's in sir, like getting involved in all these stupid dramas with her stupid staff. Yet, the ratings for Vanderpump Rules are through the roof and we are definitely getting a second season. So she will continue to slum it on Dancing with the Stars and Vanderpump Rules in order to bring home the bacon. Well, I really wish that Lisa would be like she is on Vanderpump Rules on Real Housewives because I really love her being like, "Stussy, you go to my restaurant with some men. I'm on to you. I'm on to you." Cut the crap. I know what you're up to. I mean, I would love it, but I'll be able to sell that. She needs to give a little bit more of that to Kyle, yeah. Stassi did have one redeeming thing that she did this week, which is that. When she was fighting with Jax in the pool, she's like, "Don't swim away from me like a moody mermaid." I just cracked up at that. I know she wasn't intentionally trying to have an amusing turn of phrase, but I just thought the idea of Jax being a moody mermaid, and then for him to be like, "I'm not a moody mermaid," was kind of amazing to me. One of the writers at TV Gasm is friends with this whole crew because they're friends with some of the staff at Sir, so they can show. When do we get to go out with them? Of God, do you want to? She's told them about us. I'm sure we do not want to go. That's probably why we've got people on our page trying to make us feel sorry for those horsies. They probably threw drinks on us like they did in Vegas. Stassi said she would come on the show, but I just can't have it. You know, I should have set that up last week when I was gone. I thought it was Sheena. Not Stassi. Sheena. Sheena. I don't want anybody from Azusa near me anyway, even if it's B.S. Skype. This is why we can't ever talk to them or hang out with them. We're horrible. That's okay. I don't want... Anyway, she was saying that Stassi's actually... No, no one's proud to be from Azusa, by the way. It's not like Sheena is proud of that. She said that I was... Stassi is actually really, really nice and funny and genuine. I was like, "What?" and she also... Someone on our Facebook page said that Jax is the only person that's not friends with everybody on Facebook, so they probably really did get rid of him or he was never really even a part of their circle in the first place. Well, when he lied to them all, they all looked pretty mad, which is why Stassi said, "Frank was telling the truth the entire line," which for some reason... It was just like a mess up. She then said time right after, but for some reason when she said lying the entire line, it just... I don't know why it just made me crack up. I think that... I know it's like I can't get restaurant drinks out of my head. I think that she... I think the thing that was so offensive to her is that her friends, of course, know that Jax was lying. I mean, of course, Jax went to Las Vegas and knocked up some hooker. Of course, he did. He's Jax. Like, he's never been some angel, but I think that they knew that it was her fault deep down, and I think that that's what offended her. It's like they didn't care that he had done that. The point was she's an asshole, and he's fun. Right, exactly. They all still think that she's worse than he is. That's the thing. Like, he can be terrible, but she's always going to be worse. She will always be worse. And the thing is this, she can never blame it on the editing because we saw her on the Amazing Race Family Edition. We know she was bred to be obnoxious, and she continues to be obnoxious. She was a brat at 14, and she's a brat at 24 with a chin-in plant. Right, and they're showing the preview for next week because they are doing Greek Union. I'm sure episodes one through seven of a reunion, and she's continuing to sit up there on a stool, crying her eyes out real tears, saying that everyone thinks that I'm the asshole. Everyone thinks that I'm the jerk of the season, that I'm the villain, and it's like, you did this to yourself. Yeah, the words come out of your stupid mouth, which is a beast to a lady. Yeah, and I love that Bravo puts those little contests on the bottom of the screen. I love those. They're like, what percentage of you think Stassi's a horrible seaworthy a-hole? 96%. It's never like a split. It's never like even 70. It's always like, you think Stassi's wrong? Yes, 98%. Yeah. How many of you think that Stassi is a sloppy donkey hole? No, like 99%. This was actually a real one. How many of you think Jackson needs to put 50 socks in his Speedo? Yeah. It's like, yeah, he needs to put 70 more socks in his. It's like, it's clear that no one in Washington's show actually likes these people. Everyone just loves ragging on them. That's why I've grown to like the show, because it's so vile, but it's the sort of vile show that you can just really well on. Speaking of vile, can we talk about the ridiculous three-minute segment of creepy, creepy, Laura Lee telling Lisa that she had to quit because she was moving to North Carolina to go work on a Jennifer Aniston film? Like she's Jennifer Aniston's real co-star? Yes. I looked that up and she is doing a movie, but I don't, I mean, she is doing a movie with Jennifer Aniston, but... So are 500 other supporting cast now? I know. She probably has like one line, and she's like, what sort of what sort of milk would you like in your meth? I mean coffee. And the director's piece of it. Let's keep that. Let's keep that in. I'm just saying this right now. I am a lifetime voting member of the Golden Raspberry Rewards, aka the Razzies, and I am already going to send an email to the president nominating Laura Lee for her role in the Jennifer Aniston film for worst supporting actress of the year. Wait, I like Laura Lee. Laura Lee was like the one sane person. I felt like she like... Wait, wait. She is not sane. Or a meth head. I thought, she holds together pretty well. No, she's not on heart. No, no. Let me tell you something, no, no. She was the one like when she would go off on Stasi when she'd go off on anyone, she actually had a voice of reason. You can see she's just like this person who's in this hideous job with these hideous people and she's just getting pushed. And even though she's kind of crazy, there's something I thought sort of likeable about her. Nobody with a voice of reason is like, oh, hey, I have a hot new boyfriend. Let me take him to my meth attics anonymous class on date two. You have to be being held. Probably right on the block from all of our houses. Yeah, it was right by they were standing outside MBAR. They were like really just, oh no, you're right. No, you're right. It was outside them, but they were like at that little coffee shop that's next to sassafras. Who has who has fucking meth head beatings there? And I love that the guy that they showed like doing is confessional or whatever before her was like actually a meth that he's like, wow. But you know what though? Like, I mean, you still have to give Lora Lee credit for her, her final like monologuing and checks, which is like, you had a 33 year old waiter. Having I expected sex with me. No, she was running on Facebook. She said, she said, you told me intimate things while you were inside of me. Isn't that like it was like a Melrose place script. That is something that definitely Amanda Woodward said to Billy in front of Alison to make Alison want to go hang herself like their ex boss at DMD advertising. Like it was that kind of script. Well, it's only Lora Lee realized that everything Jack told her while he was inside of her relies. That was really bad. I mean, by the way, if I'm ever on a reality TV show, please Jesus cast me. All I'm going to do is take like old episodes of 902 and on Melrose place and memorize them so I can spew them at my cast members. Well, that was horrible last. I guess you already talked about this, but when they were sitting, when he was in the steam room and she was outside the steam room and he said, is this what it's like talking to your dad? Did you talk about that? Oh, you starting to sound like a robot? Everyone sounds like a robot right now. I think that the sky sky is like, oh my god, is this what I'm using my bandwidth on? Is this discussion to go on right now? Everything sounds all the time we all sound like we're in a 1980s telephone. Did it clear up? No, it's terrible. Everyone sounds hideous. I wonder if it's me. Well, we could still hear each other. Just isn't clear. So sorry listeners. I think I'll still sound clear because I'm on the local since I'm recording it this week, you know. Okay, well, we're pretty much done with all this. Oh no, we have Top Chef still. Top Chef, so Sheldon went home. Yes, I was reading for the all-girl finale. I really was, but god, I was crying a little bit when he left. I felt so bad for him. I like him and I, you know, Ronnie, if you had bothered to listen to our podcast last week, you would have heard my rant about, no, I just, let's just be honest. I like that you're honest, like, like Brandy Glanville. If you're taking a break, I'm taking a full break. I thought you were sick not taking a break. Well, it's a break. I hadn't been. That's an excuse to hide in bed and not do shit. Okay, anyway, I think that last chance kitchen is a complete crock of shit. And I did think that Kristen went out way too early on this season, but I do not think it is right for her to be able to sneak back in at the last second and boot Sheldon out. It should have been Sheldon and Brooke and the finale in the first place. And yes, Kristen is amazing, but if Brooke does not win and it goes to Kristen, I think that Bravo is going to have a serious problem on their hands because I think that people are going to be crying foul and saying this is total crap and you should not be able to win the show this way. Well, you didn't watch last chance kitchen, right? I just watched all that God damn much ads. That's all I needed to say. Yeah, I'm not criticizing you for not watching. I'm just saying that when you watch it, it makes a little bit more sense because the challenges are really hard and she had to beat really she had to beat everybody who got kicked off after her in order to make it like excuse me. No, no, I saw enough of the last chance kitchen to say CJ took out seven people and then Kristen comes in and takes out four and she's back in the finale. But each one you take out gets there are better and better chefs that get taken out for the most. No, sometimes there's the terror of chefs like he was thinking out the chefs who couldn't cook a piece of chicken, whatever. Look, I'm going to just listen. Listen, here's the thing though, Bravo, if Kristen wins, Bravo would be happy because it says see our web show is legitimized because it had produced a real result. So I think they'll be happy. They would be happy with it. If you guys are fools enough to think that if that happens, all that is is Bravo trying to pull the wool over people's eyes and forcing us to go to their websites and it's called I already give you enough of my life watching your crap TV shows around the clock. Now you want me to go spend 11 minutes per week also watching one of your crap shows online? No, it's not fair. I already give you enough of my life. You should put it on the goddamn television. Either way, Sheldon messed up. It's a good show. Sheldon still messed up though because he did the age old mistake. I don't know why anyone ever does this. He comes back and he's like, well, I've never really made this before. This isn't really my style, but I want to do something different. Do you have flashbacks to the Suvi? I always have. Totally. I have souvi flashbacks all the time for that. That's stupid. Oh my god. She ruined Karla. Has there ever been a successful Suvi on Top Chef? I think like people should stay away from it. Well, it's because it's gelatinous grossness. I mean, Suvi is just fucking disgusting. I can't believe that that's even still around that needs to go away. That needs to go away like red dining rooms. Like people paint in their like an accent wall red. No, stop it. That's just done. But I do want to agree with Matt on one thing. Darling. I think that it is the thing that is kind of annoying with Kristen is that she got to come back for another chance, right? But she really didn't do anything mind-blowing. She fucked up just as much as Sheldon, if not more. I mean, she fucked up a lot of stuff in the end. So she should have, I think in order to come back, you should really have to blow everybody away to get another chance to come back. Right. I mean, that was guaranteed to make the final two was brook. Yeah. And I think that the, I think last chance kitchen should also maybe deposit a chef, not at the finale, but maybe a week or two. Hello. We've been saying that for the past few weeks. Sort of what they did last year with Vev. Right. If you get dropped into the final four, I'm all for that. It's not like it's just the fast pass to the finale is effed up. Yeah. Yeah. Plus on top of that, it also kind of screwed up everything because now they're in LA for the finale, which feels a little anticlimactic. And they're doing this weird, almost like iron chef thing for the finale tomorrow night. And they're also calling it like top chef Seattle, but it was called top chef Seattle for half the season, then half in Alaska. Now we're going to LA and now it's becoming the iron chef. What the fuck? Yeah, I like the idea of it being iron chef because they can't, they can't really cheat as much. You know, like the judges get to cheat a lot more when it's, well, I guess it's not live anyway, but it seems like they can just make it up as they go along. Because I noticed on top chef with every episode, they sound like, well, oh my god, this was amazing. This was delicious. And then when it gets to judges table, they're like, this was disgusting. I don't know why you would serve this with that. It's like you weren't saying that 20 minutes ago, motherfucker. Yeah, yeah. I don't know. I'm excited for it. I hope Brooke wins. I kind of hope Brooke wins, but I would also like to see Kristen just kick ass and like legit win because it looks like she has to have stuff on on her team. And as fun as stuff on is as a human being and all that he's not very good. Yeah, I think that's like a hint. That's what we'd call a handicap. She probably she probably chose him because they have their their little like wrote flirt thing going on. God, never team up with someone you want to fuck. Usually in my case, it means they're just a horrible person. If I want to fuck them in the first place, they're usually poor, talentless and a fugly. So I shouldn't team up with them. My life is horrible. I can't do this podcast anymore. All right. Well, we and surprisingly, we only had we only talked about two and a half shows this week. I know. Well, we only went 10 minutes over this time around. So anyway, I think that's the perfect time for us to wrap things up. I'm Ben Mandelker from bsideblog.com and my Twitter is @bsideblog same with my Instagram. Matt is with us. Matt Matt would field life on the M list on Twitter. And I guess I am with you. Yeah. I have the intro again. You're like the new Eddie McGee. I'm Ronny. I'm with @TVgasm or tvgasm.com and come on our Facebook page because I posted our Real Housewives of Beverly Hills recap and I'm about to post our redub of the week. So you have to plug my stuff. You just don't plug your own shit. Why don't you plug stuff? You know, I need to start inviting her head. I just started inviting what Matt? You'd have to us to participate in your redubs. No, the redubs would take forever. But maybe the recap. But thank you for the suggestion. Okay. I have I have nothing to plug. That's why I'm plugging my Instagram. Oh, well, you're not doing your recaps right now. Are you going to be doing them for Orange County? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know when I get my blog up and going again. I mean, people, I still post things here and there. I post like just like little food items. But yeah, you post restaurant stuff. I co-worker Dave put together Stassi's 12, 12 most offensive disgusting moments from the season. And I'm going to post that because it's kind of amazing. Yeah, that's I mean, I feel that that's my pal Dave Nemitz from Yahoo TV. And I'm going to post it and you all need to read it because it's awesome. Look, I got a I go to our page to read it literally like four times a day when I'm sitting on my computer. And when we don't have shows constantly airing, there's days that we're dead for days and days and days. I mean, I think it's better to post stuff and go on there and read. I think it's really fun. I also like I like posting like the gossipy moments to and then getting a bit of these reaction like when I posted the Lisa Vanderpump joining Dancing with the Stars, people participated. And by the way, we are now over 100 likes slash followers on 1000 1000 baby steps. I would like to say thank you to Jesse for making that picture of Kim and Fatface with their dueling chicken salad and egg salad. It was it makes me laugh so much. That's so stunning. Thank you, Jesse. Okay, so we're out of here. We will see you next time. Like, subscribe, comment, do all that bullshit. Love you. Love you. Did you guys hang up on me? I wanted to, but I didn't. If you like listening to comedy, try watching it on the internet. The folks behind the sideshow network have launched a new YouTube channel called Wait For It. It's got interviews with comedians like Reggie Watts, Todd Glass, Liza Schlesinger, Slicing, driving friends with it for 10 years. One of the funniest people out there, and I still have a hard time with the last name Liza. Our very own Owen Benjamin, that's me, takes you on a musical journey down internet rabbit holes and much more. You don't have to wait any longer. Just go to youtube.com/waitforaccomedy. There's no need to wait for it anymore because it's here and it's funny and I love you. A few days ago, Brooke Todine posted an inspirational quote on her wall that got 17 likes and three comments. Thumbs up, Brooke. Geico also wants to make a comment. In just 15 minutes, you could save hundreds of dollars on your car insurance by switching to Geico, and nothing says inspiration better than saving money. Well, except for those posters that say things like teamwork, excellence, and make it happen. #Keep Climbing #Saveings. Geico, 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance. If you like Watchbook Crapins, you can list some ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey at wondery.com/survey. Are you in trouble with the law? Need a lawyer who will fight like hell to keep you out of jail? We defend and we fight just like you want your own children to defend it. Whether you're facing a drug charge, caught up on a murder app, accused of committing war crimes, look no further than Paul Bergren. All the big guys go to Bergren because he gets everybody off. You name it, Paul can do it. Need to launder some money, broker a deal with a drug cartel, take out a witness, from Wondery. The makers of Dr. Death and over my dead body comes a new series about a lawyer who broke all the rules. 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