Tea Parties, Sur Idiots, and Persian-Palooza!
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#60: Tea Parties, Sur Idiots, and Persian-Palooza!
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Hey everyone, it's Watch What Crap Inz, a weekly podcast dedicated to all that fun stuff on Bravo that we love. I've been Mandel here from VisaBlog.com. You can find me at VisaBlog on Twitter and Instagram and Facebook. And also we have Ronnie Karam from tvguysm.com. Hi Ronnie. Well hello everybody. Ronnie can also be found at tvguysm on Twitter. Are you on Instagram Ronnie? Um, no, not really. I think I have like two pictures of my dog. Okay. And also Matt Woodfield from Yahoo. Hello Matt. Hey guys. Matt is @lifeonthemless on Twitter and... I'm also on the Instagram. I need some more fucking Instagram people. Oh, I just said fucking and that lady doesn't like me when I say the F word. Oh my god, this podcast is already ruined. Oh, I'm sorry, it's all my fault. Let's talk to Eddie. He thinks it's always my fault. Oh my god, poor Eddie. Poor Eddie. Eddie follows me on Instagram now actually. Eddie, why aren't you following me on Instagram? Goddammit. Actually you guys should, everyone should follow all of us on Instagram because Instagram is so much fun. And on top of that, on our face, we have a Facebook page too, our podcast here, and it's facebook.com. Watch what crap is and you should especially follow that if you aren't already because not only do we post the fun stuff and there's great discussion, but we post fun photos too. And last night when I was watching Real Housewives at Beverly Hills, I was looking at Taylor Armstrong's crazy face and I just couldn't resist it. I had to take all these still shots and I compiled them into a little collage and put them up on our Facebook page. So I hope everyone looks at that and enjoys it. Our Facebook is actually blowing up. We're almost at a thousand, I don't know if it's likes or followers or whatever, but it's a lot of fun and we really appreciate all of you guys interacting with us there. And then also obviously you know how I live for an iTunes comment and we really do appreciate it. We're still a full five stars this far in. I think this is our 60th episode you guys. Oh wow, we really should start planning our 69th episode. We have nine weeks to do this. I think our 69th episode should definitely be involving MJ on some sliders, a true celebration. We'll just go across the street, knock on our door. She's like, you cannot come in, it's Persia, Belusia. We'll be like a couple, we have sliders. We have sliders made with pomegranates and chickpeas and lamb. Before we start, don't you guys think it's really weird? I actually watched Masha's Beverly Hills and Vanderpump Rules back to back to back the other night and it's just so bizarre to me that we live amongst them. They go everywhere I go. The horses from Vanderpump Rules were eating brunch at home and silver, which I love, it's just too weird for me. It's funny, I've never been to home and after seeing that, I kind of want to go there now. It's delicious. Maybe we'll have our Oh, it does. I wasn't a frat. I can deal with bar rot. I wasn't a frat. Were we in the same frat? Actually, we both were in Segep, right? Segep, what what? Everybody right now, like all the ladies that are listening are going home. I got these homos were in frats. We were in fraternities and we watched football. I've been only because in the 80s, all the pornos were about frat guys like giving each other blow jobs. Okay, maybe that's true. Half of my frat was like closeted gay dudes, but that's another story. And mine too. But no, getting back to your point, it is crazy. I think the same things, when they're wandering around, it's like, this is our town. We see our balconies, we see our buildings on these shows. It's the craziest shit of all time. I'm probably the only one, but I hit pause on the aerial shots and I'm like, where actually is Lily's condo? Oh, it's right there. Oh, yeah, I found Lily's condo. Do you know where it is? Isn't she on Burton Way? Or is that golden? No, no, no, no, no, Lily, for all those who want to stalk Lily, her condo is the one that's at the intersection of Fountain in Los Diego. Oh, that's her. Okay, that's a nice building. Yeah. And remember, I saw her at the CVS across the street, which further confirmed it. Right, she's in the middle of the gay zone. Go Lily. Yeah, she probably has a penis. Let's get real. I don't know. Anyway, we have so much to talk about, aside from Los Angeles geography, and we're going to talk about all our favorite shows, Top Chef, Top Chef, Real House of Atlanta, Real House of Beverly Hills, Shaza Sunset, and Vanderpump Rules. And we have some gossip, too. Ronnie, do you have gossip for us? No, not really. I'll get to it in the Beverly Hills stuff. There's a lot of extra Beverly Hills stuff today. So that'll just be a really long conversation. Can I ask a quick question? Can I ask a quick question before we do Beverly Hills? I don't know. Can you? Okay. Well, may I? Okay. Shame on you. I hope you're pointing your finger in my face because I'm pointing my finger back in your face like Kim Richards calling you a slut pig. It was for Eddie McGee, I have to admit. Oh, okay. I just had a quick question. I guess it's kind of for everybody also that's listening to the podcast you guys should weigh in on the Facebook page. But are we going to be watching the new medical wives show? Are we going to be watching the LA Shrinks show? Are we going to invest in either of those? I have things to say about that. LA Shrinks, I don't think I'm very invested in that. Even though oddly enough, my friend was on the promo. So I guess he's one of the patients, but I still don't think I'm going to watch. But then the doctor would married to medicine at first. I was like, Oh, great. Here's another generic show. But then when that Australian lady was like, act like a doctor's wife, not like a common whore or something like that, I was like, that's when I was sold. Yeah, I was like, okay. And then they showed like the women like tackling each other at a restaurant. I was like, okay, I'll watch. Anytime there's a fight at a restaurant or around a dinner table, we're in. Yeah, I'm down. That should look horrible. But they all do. I mean, like, let's let's talk about all the shows that are coming out. There's that. Okay. There's the strengths that looks just horrible. What about the crazy? What about the dukes of Melrose? No, I'm not going to watch that one. That looks awful. Those are the kind of people I fucking avoid in this town. Those old queens and Hugh Hefner robes, and they smell like patchouli and like, patchouli, no, for men. There's a mixture, you know, an old spice deodorant, like all mixed together and just like old fart, no, gross. Let me ask you guys this one other thing. So what do you think about the fact that obviously Rachel, so and Brad had a major falling out. They have not been talking and now Bravo has decided to pair them on fashion night. So it's going to be an hour of Rachel, so followed by Brad Brad world and then the dukes of Melrose. Do you think that Rachel is hating on Bravo or does that, you know, scale it for a bit? It's just still excited to be on TV. I think I think Bravo is just being tricky. I think I'm not tricky. That's right. I think I don't know. I think they've realized that they've since Project Runway, they have never been able to get fashion off the ground again. And so they're like, well, you know, Rachel Zow is pretty much their flagship fashion show at this point. And they're like, well, we might as well stick Brad in there because, you know, he doesn't do well enough on his own. So they paired him down to half an hour, stuck him with the dukes of Melrose and, you know, put him next to Rachel Zow. I don't know. I think Bravo is trying. I think they're calling it fashion night, but what they really mean is why straight people hate us night. And they're just going to shove it all together in one night and just let all the gay bastards go for it and use that as their defense when they drag us around the streets on the back of their pickup truck. You know, if Bravo had any sense, they wouldn't be playing around with dukes of Melrose and Brad Brad World. They should bring back Kill on Earth and pair that with Rachel. Don't even get me started. I want more Kill on Earth. Kill on Earth. I love that show. Cry outside. It's fucking fashion week. Which coincidentally it is right now in New York City. I don't have time for this, Matt. It's fucking fashion week. Did anybody watch that show last year? It was paired with that horrible Chris March show, but I liked the one where it was like that that bitch at the that really bitchy girl at a New York like thrift store and they were like a consignment shop. They have I feel like like every year they sort of tried out some generic consignment shop show because didn't they have one that took place in Melrose that was like LA consignment and then people would come and be like this is worth $300 and they're like well we'll give you $20 and they'd like start each other and be like boom and then go to commercial. Yeah well that was a dramatic moment Ben. So we needed a gong and you know that's what happens and go break commercial shows. I hate those shows for the same reason I hate thrifting in LA because it's not fucking thrifting. It's so bad what they do here. You go into a place you you see a pair of jeans and they're like that'll be $70 really bitch. These are old ass things. These smell like the 70s that's how gross these things are. You're just going the wrong. You have to go if you want to you want a thrift shop you have to go like east like east of downtown or go to like recida or downtown. Are you wearing dirty used clothes? Me? Yes. They're dirty but they're not used. You used to downtown I'm not that's not worth it. You know why it's worth it you know that's worth it. There is an amazing thrift shop that's east of downtown the Saint the the DePaul whatever society I went there once and I saw Ryan Gosling and that made it worth it. You know I saw him at the YMCA. He knows he makes a lot of money right. Whoa whoa whoa whoa did you see him in the locker room A and Ben did you see him in a non-changing room at the thrift store go? He was he was in jeans and a white v-neck much like what I'm wearing right now. I said he looked much better than I do in this outfit and I never had a thing for Ryan Gosling before that and at first of all I always thought he was like five ten turns out he's like six three or something like that and a crazy handsome in person and now I appreciate the Ryan Gosling. Ronnie did you see him in the locker room? Come on. No he is not going to be getting naked at the YMCA. He's not stupid. I mean we all have cell phone cameras now and you know that YMCA has signs all over it that say no cell phones allowed in the locker room because you know people are taking pictures of TV stars stuff in there but no I saw him outside on a bench just chilling after he was finished working out. Excuse me for a minute. Of course found a reason to be on my cell phone next to that bench for about ten minutes. This one's again this folds back into this into this discussion before. I can't believe we live in this city because not only do we see our our our haunts on these TV shows when we go to our haunts we see people that like we should not be crossing paths with like I saw back when I was a member of 24 hour fitness years ago I saw Justin Timberlake there twice like that should not be I should not be seeing Justin Timberlake at the gym but because then you feel like shit afterwards you know you're like oh like I thought I was making progress and then Justin Timberlake walks in and I'm not making any progress whatsoever. The point is the LA can be extremely defeating. Yeah that guy from Babe who's like that'll be dead. What does he say? What does he say? That's all from Babe. That's all that'll do Babe. Yeah that'll do pig. Okay so he went he went to that gym too and I was like oh my god James Cromwell looks better than me. I'm really really going down. Okay let's get to some housewives because they're being ridiculous at this point. Let's get to Beverly Hills. You know where you guys can also see famous people on TV like who cares. Yeah okay so let's go to you want to start with Bev's? I think because that was last night so why don't we just because it's the freshest let's start with Beverly Hills where the big story was that Lisa Vanderpump had what's turning into her annual tea party and it was a disaster as usual. First of all I was very sad that Kim Richards wasn't there but I loved her excuse. Ronny can you please play Kim Richards on the phone drunk right now calling Lisa. Ring ring ring ring ring ring. I'm so sorry. I was all my way over there but then I got hit in the face. I got hit in the not by a person by this dog. I got this huge dog he's so big. He's like a horse and then I told him you can't have that rope but he punched me in the face. He punched me. I'm going to be doing some PSA's about it during Emilio's yesterday as we've been in contract negotiations. The lights the lights went out in the room. I didn't see the dog and he like he jumped on me and and there was a ferris wheel that I got on and I was like why am I on the ferris wheel not the freeway. I got to go someone's in my bushes. She comes in get out of my bushes. Don't need to go dusty or your frame your picture frames Kim. I'm making chicken salad in the class at the dogs outside guiding me. He says he's the key master and I'm the gate keeper. Are we all in agreement that she is not sober? She's never been sober. This is to me my favorite Kim Richards excuse because all the other ones were kind of like had an elaborate story of like well the lights went off. I couldn't find my hair dryer and the mirrors were dirty but that's not just like I got hit in the face. She's getting to the point now. She's like she's running out of ideas. I got hit in the face. Where were the Bravo cameras then because that was a missed opportunity. Oh my god. She's probably having the maid dust him off downstairs while she was upstairs getting beat by your dog. That was crazy. She's not sober. She has not been sober. That whole interview she did with Andy after the reunion or whatever she was completely drunk into. Her interview about being sober she was drunk. I don't know. I kind of like her that way. I mean we asked one of my family members to sober up and it was hell. We ended up asking her to start drinking again. So anyway so aside from Kim I mean the episode pretty much started out with Lisa demanding that Kyle defender and Kyle was like oh it's just so hard for me. She's trying to pull a page from her sister and I didn't buy any of it. Did you guys? Well nobody but buys anything from coming out of Kyle's mouth. Well you know I write the recaps or whatever every week and this week in the comments they're kind of arguing about that and everyone's saying well Lisa you know Lisa's being passive aggressive and you know she doesn't need people sticking up for her and she's being ridiculous with Kyle. The point isn't that Lisa needs somebody to stick up for her. She wants Kyle is always sticking up for Adrienne when she knows that Adrienne's been nothing but a see word to Lisa and has thrown her under the bus so many times and Kyle's obviously being nice to Adrienne because she's rich. She doesn't have any real relationship with Adrienne and she's supposed to be Lisa's friend. It's like girl code. You're supposed to not treat your friends like shit just because there's someone richer in the room. Right and when Lisa is like jumping in and defending herself when Camille's attacking her of course Lisa is not a wallflower so she's gonna defend herself. All she wanted was Kyle to back her up. Kyle didn't need to jump in first but she could have just been part of the course in the background going hey that's not cool and it's not that big of an ask on Lisa's part. I mean look this is something that she wanted from the reunion a year ago. Why hasn't Kyle gotten it through her head that all Lisa wants is just a teeny bit of support. And we've seen Lisa go to bat for Kyle. We saw it with Camille. We saw when and that was all Kyle's fucking fault too by the way. Yeah and then we saw later when she was hating Brandy and Brandy's first season and Lisa was going to bat for her so whatever. And on top of that the entire season one one of the major subplots was that Kyle was mad at Kim for not setting up for her during the whole Camille situation. Proving once again that Kyle is the biggest hypocrite in Housewives history. Exactly Kyle. Kyle will speak up when she wants to speak up you know she's not this she says she's like gets nervous and she doesn't want to like get in the middle but you know it like you know she definitely likes getting in the middle and she will definitely speak her mind she doesn't care about she doesn't give a shit about you know getting in the middle at all. Yes kids confrontation so much that she brings Faye uninvited to a tea party. Don't even get me started on that yeah with people. Oh my god it was like a character from Coraline walking in. At the end though of the little like Kyle Lisa makeup session the weird thing was to me like I kind of felt like it was a little bit squashed but then they went to the confessionals and both of the women are saying like yes things have changed it's never going to be the same again like I don't I really just don't know if they're ever going to get past it. Yes the women have been photographed together out in LA recently and I'm sure they're obviously still friends because they're cast mates I get it but do you think that they'll ever be besties? I don't. No I don't think so. No way I would know but once someone fucks you over I mean it's like this I'm sure in everybody's life once somebody fucks you over you can forgive them all you want but you're never going to be telling them your deepest darkest and all that. Yeah it takes a while. And Kyle's wrong about how Lisa is Lisa is you know she's like okay I'll forgive you and I'll be nice to you but I am never going to trust your ass again and she's right about that she shouldn't. I mean look what you did then you bring fucking Faye like why yeah why would why would Lisa ever want to trust Kyle I mean Kyle comes from a family of crazies look at Kim look at Kathy look at Paris look at everyone who surrounds them why would Lisa ever want that in her inner circle? No it's true I mean they're cast mates they're not best friends I get it it's just I think that they play along and they're going to have tips for the rest of time but that they will they'll make make nice when Bravo's paychecks are you know being written. You know who I would like Lisa to move on from Kyle and become best friends with Yolanda because she already is I think that they are actually real friends but you know we don't see a lot of them together palling around but because Yolanda is always jetting off with David Foster to Barbara Streisand's Chateaus. So now Yolanda had only like one brief scene at the beginning of the episode and it was great first of all she sits there complaining she's like well we don't have enough money for two or three horses which you know most girls have two or three horses around here but we only have one like David Monning for the horses. Shut up are you seriously complaining to Brandy who's like the poorest person to ever be on a housewives show besides Chateaus. Oh yeah and by the way David Foster is worth over 300 million. Yeah he definitely has money for a few horses but I guess maybe she's on the allowance. Yeah I'd like to say she probably has a horse budget you know. Yeah she's on a lending for you now. I think it's very important. I saw those lemons on the side of the Pacific coast. I was gonna say she could have a really awesome stand. I know she I could just imagine her like oh you have to go with a message you have to learn English if you want to sell your lemons you have to go home and stuff your English. This way see look how easily I sell my lemons. I would buy an eight dollar cup of lemonade from her on the side of PCH I would. I would definitely. I have to add and I'm sorry I forgot to add this but when we were talking about Lisa one thing about her being passive aggressive and all that I did I do think that Lisa's in the right but someone did post a view clip the view on our Facebook page and it's of Lisa on the view and she's she is kind of passive aggressive you know. She's like she's British. You know what I have to deal with on this show you know look at these look at Camille saying I don't own my restaurant you know you see that as the latest thing I have to deal with and did you see it the reunion when they all ganked up on me I mean that's something else that and so then I was like okay shut up lady all right I've had enough of you. The Brits the Brits love some good past aggression I mean why do you think we all love down the Abbey because it's nothing but past aggression that's if you're British that's how you deal with things. We all have mothers yeah but the other thing was whoopee ask her at one point. Can I ask you a question why is Faye Resnick on this show? And Lisa goes who and then everyone laughs and then she goes I don't know and then just like moved on. Like it was so beneath her she didn't even have time to even entertain the idea or theorize about it. Well let me ask you this do you guys think that Kyle invited Faye or do you think that I mean she's also I mean she's also Adrienne's biggest cheerleader we saw that at Kyle's previous dinner party where Faye was going to bat for Adrienne there. I'm wondering if Adrienne felt like she needed some hench women there with her for support knowing that she was going to be there sitting across the table from Brandy. They're really just becoming an awful click of women the Adrienne and Faye and Kyle like when they walked in that cheap party he's just like well Camille I like Camille even though she's been and I still love Camille but like we don't like I don't I just don't like her defending Adrienne I just want her to be team Lisa. I was on that team because where do you think she's getting all this information from it's wrong she's getting it from Adrienne so she's sitting on the phone with those bitches too talking about everybody else and then showing up and acting all innocent. I'm just so confused because Camille I didn't think was on that team but she is like Camille's defending Adrienne and but then Taylor seems to almost be defending Brandy and Taylor hated Brandy so nothing really makes sense to me at this moment but then again Taylor is probably worth it. Well it will make sense it all makes sense because last year Camille was suing she was the one who was mad because she was going to get sued for saying that Taylor got beat right remember Russell was going to sue her he sent her an email or something which by the way Camille is party well and Camille was totally justified in feeling that way last year. Yes she was yes yes she was but who stood up for her Adrienne Adrienne was the one who basically kicked Taylor out of the party so she's she's sticking with Adrienne no matter what because Lisa wasn't really sticking with her and now Lisa's friends with Taylor so well look I give I give Camille a pass for that like I understand her motivation she doesn't get a pass for anything she's a stupid whore who lucked into some money by opening her life so drunk ass rich man at a bar who were agents set her up with please that woman won the sussy lottery excuse me she's a dancer she's a dancer and here's my answer Dan why is she not a full-time cast member this year she has had way more screen time than Taylor Kim and Yolanda combined she can't show her kids and she doesn't want to show her private life because her her boyfriend is the brother of a serial killer and she doesn't want that all over the TV well Bravo must be paying her something right yeah she does not just show up for free I think it probably wasn't decided until later in the season that she wasn't really a full housewife I mean it's like they have you know that they've got footage of Taylor that they've just never put in there you know that they filmed her like she probably thinks that she's a star of the season and they just have they've cut her out of the whole thing you know I think you didn't get to say to Camille like hey um you show up at Lisa's uh uh you know brunch or tea party and we'll cut you a check for seventy five hundred like how does this work no she probably has a contract where she earns a certain amount of money but like it's that they're not going to follow her alone around they're not going to go into her life they're not giving her a mark for her she shows up at parties or she might show up at a lunch with someone or whatever but like it's if they're they're not following her specifically and she probably just say this the fact that you know Ronnie I can understand that you're pissed off and that you hate her I get it but at the same time I just want you to admit that she makes for better TV than Marissa or or even at this point I would say Adrienne by far yeah now I have to say actually Marissa's just marinating give her time have you been reading twitter because Marissa's Marissa is fighting with all of them on twitter and it's amazing like she's so do you think that she was just sitting back collecting notes the entire time so that she could then start spreading her venom well that that's the way that a new cast member should be remember Kelly Benson owned she spent the first half of her first season doing nothing and I was like why the even cast this person you want them to sort of settle in and then all of a sudden snap and announce their presence I mean you know as opposed to like Kenya Moore who just was crazy right off the bat admittedly Kenya Moore sort of saved this season of Atlanta but she was like crazy around the bat you almost feel like but that's a disease she's just trying to get like screen time at least with Marissa I like the idea of someone coming in trying to be polite and they get pushed their limit then it goes they snap and they're crazy the rest of time speaking of Marissa how much more like abuse can her husband take where she's essentially going like yeah I've been fucking him since I was 16 and I'm tired of his dick yeah I want to clarify you guys it's not that I don't find him sexy I'm just bored of him and I want to have sex with somebody yes you just made that a lot better as she says that in front of her I'm in front of Lisa's like young Vanderpump like STD laden men no I want to talk about Taylor first oh wait wait wait wait we can't go there yet because we're not done with Camille okay look I know that I still hate Camille and you guys like her and you're gonna stick up for her but come on we love her we love her we just like her tv time 101 at wordpress.com has collected all of her tweets from the past couple of days because of course people are hammering her ass on Twitter because she's a fucking hypocrite and a liar you guys totally it's called out and Adrienne is claiming that she never filed any kind of lawsuit which is bullshit because she totally had her lawyer send a cease and desist letter and everybody knows that it's true well hello that's why we got a to be continued and you know that Brandy's gonna whip that shit out next week she better I hope she can drive to the valley and back fast enough with those papers yeah but all that rosé and her veins I don't know about that don't give her rosé and a reason this is what Camille who by the way Camille change your picture because you don't look like that that is like playboy bunny bunny picture from the 80s I actually saw her at the RuPaul Drag Race season premiere party at the Abbey three weeks ago and she looks really cute so shut the fuck I would like to see an ice close-up cross-eyed picture of Camille looking like she's about to shit herself okay that's the real Camille gee I mean she did run to the bathroom so I think the IBS is always always always there you know Lisa served cheese on purpose so her tweet says it's simple if a lawsuit was filed it would be in public court records and Brandy wrote she was threatening me with the lawsuit as you know because you all have the same lawyer please tell the truth okay so then other people start hammering her um no real lawyer can give info on a non-client he would be disbarred I don't know that that's true Twitter but had to be hard knowing Adrienne lied to you and you stuck up for her but we still good Camille there is no lawsuit against BG from am hashtag truth I really think BG is confused well if there was a lawsuit it would be public record um negotiation is not public Susan it always begins with a cease and desist letter uh hard to be had to be hard knowing Adrienne lied to you and you stuck up for her but we so good there is no loss she just keeps saying the same tweet there is no loss she's sticking to like she's sticking to like a technicality sure there may not be a lawsuit but there was still a cease and desist or some sort of threatening of a lawsuit which to me is yes something that's as bad Brandy to lawyer up yes as angel of death says Camille is using selective logic she makes no sense and that's so true she's going out of her way to argue when she knows the truth she knows that there was a cease and desist letter there was no there was no uh lawsuits with Russell and and Taylor they just sent us cease and desist it's like again they're threatening to sue someone exactly and and Adrienne also said very clearly Brandy said you didn't have your lawyer said my lawyer letter and she said no absolutely not that is absolutely not true okay well ronnie then if you're gonna say that then i can also say that Brandy is sitting around going Adrienne is suing me if Adrienne sent us cease and desist letter then Brandy shouldn't fucking say i'm being sued well that's true true yeah okay snap snap snap boom boom here here's what here's the thing these are they're idiots they're idiots and they're talking about the legal system and they have no right to do that they can't talk about anything right they need beidra parks in there to set them straight i agree Brandy is Brandy's a white trash hoe i mean but that's why we like her she's here stirring up shit and the thing is um lying she she will at least admit it if you confront her with that and say that she'll say okay well what i meant was the letter whatever but Adrienne is just saying flat out no she's like i dare you to i dare you to prove me wrong bitch you're lying you're lying you're lying well maybe you're not lying maybe Adrienne didn't send that letter maybe Bernie sent it don't you tweet about Bernie shame on you shame well there's another tweet in here where Camille says that that there was a cease and desist sent to to Brandy's friend named Geneva whoever the hell that is so supposedly that's an Adrienne's new story is that she didn't send it to Brandy she sent it to one of Brandy's friends which for some reason Brandy had to hire a lawyer to defend which is so stupid and also she's saying that Bernie's not sticking up for her and Bernie's not her man well Bernie just went off on another rant on on Twitter a twit longer and it is long please tell me that nobody is following him does he have more followers than us i don't know i don't follow him someone else posted it bravo levity reposted it it is just gross it's all in caps he doesn't know the difference between you're in your course um well he's a house servant what do you expect he's calling Brandy poor white trash and saying she's not rich or classy enough to even be in Beverly Hills well i'm sorry that's burning that's all true uh Bernie the mayor of Beverly Hills yes says the fucking house help of Beverly Hills he probably makes more money than Brandy who can't spell or type he's the easy a brion of this world you guys are forcing me to defend Bernie and i hate him why are you defending Bernie you don't have to do that uh he's following her drug addict he calls her a drug addict a meth head a coke head uh so far i've not yet and by the way and by the way when Brandy said these things about Kim Richards it was like Brandy how could you and now here's Bernie saying this about this lady okay then we just said that they're all dumb hookers then we can also say that Kim was Brandy was correct in saying that something was wrong with Kim and Bernie is probably not off base by saying that Adrienne or by saying that Brandy is maybe a drug addict alcoholic well Brandy has admitted that she she had issues with like Xanax and stuff like that who hasn't well so anyway what else is what else is what else is burnt what else is Matt falsely oh i would really love to be there when your children and finally get to meet you and see who you really are appreciating why their daddy left oh that's a love oh yeah he's disgusting i mean this is like three pages probably of just disgusting hateful fucking queen and you know he just needs to die yeah and yet Adrienne defends this guy of course she probably is given him reasons he's out there fighting her battles she's got but Adrienne is nicer to her chef than she is to her husband her children and her friends that is fucked up now wait can we talk about Taylor for a second here oh for not for a second for 45 seconds so Taylor was the one who who stood this all up which was hilarious okay i have to say this about Taylor i think absence kind of makes the harkrofonder in this situation because i lately when she when she shows up on screen i get so happy um because does that have anything to do with the fact that every time she's on screen they show her guzzling wine and then she fucking loses her mind she's like such a disaster it's hilarious she's more of a disaster than Kim you guys she is i mean the way she she can't even like her little passive rest of comments are so like a clunky you know they're all and not in addition to being clunky everything she says is slurred everything i guess everyone's everyone sees everyone here what did i say that as a verified bonafide Taylor hater i have to say last night was my favorite Taylor moment in years i was dying she was like how great was that one that Lisa was like um grab this saucer grab this teacup and i'm dragging them out from the table i like i was like the entire the entire tea party Lisa's like chop chop i need somebody to take this need some take the thumbs and she's like um let's take this inside you don't let the finger at your party we know this is a centerpiece we have to get out of here yeah she's like i'm getting more tea and carl said you don't need more tea there's already tea here she's like well we're going anyway and then she just scolded them but i also love the look that Taylor gave me Taylor cut the crap i love it now she's the sir Lisa wherever she is she's just telling everybody to shut up and behave themselves and keep their dick in their pants i i i loved when uh when lisa was like telling Lisa's telling Taylor that it's like you better behave this year and Taylor just like shoots her this like evil look like fuck you i had to bring security because i knew Taylor was coming Taylor's like if i weren't so wasted i would punch you how great is it that Lisa scolds her and then they walk back to the table and then the first thing Taylor does is she turns to Brandon goes so i heard you're being sued yeah the first thing out of her mouth as soon as Lisa's like can you please shut the fuck up you crazy monster oh my god and what is Adrian dude deny deny deny so i cannot and they don't show any coming next week clips of brandy showing up with folders but man i hope that she shows up with some proof at some point if she doesn't next week she'll definitely have um an attache hidden behind a pillow at the reunion yeah like some of these ladies love to whip out why is she not why is she not posted this uh season desists on twitter yet that's what i want to know Ryan Reynolds here for mid mobile with the price of just about everything going up during inflation we thought we'd bring our prices down so to help us we brought in a reverse auctioneer which is apparently a thing mid mobile unlimited premium wireless i bid to get 30 30 bid to get 20 20 bid to get 20 20 bid to get 15 15 15 just 15 bucks a month so give it a try at mid mobile dot com slash switch 45 dollars upfront payment equivalent to 15 dollars per month new customers on first three month plan only taxes and fees extra speeds lower above 40 gigabytes detail with credit karma finding the right credit card for you is easy our app analyzes user profiles to suggest personalized recommendations visit credit karma dot com today to explore cards tailored to your needs credit karma simplifying your financial choices she doesn't want to get sued yeah uh well anyway uh we should probably start moving on to another show but is there any last thoughts on Beverly Hills no that it that it finally got amazing yes it was really great last night so then let's let's just scoot on down to Vanderpump rules um where where to even begin i don't even know like i was tweeting to you guys last night because i really thought that i was going to kill myself because it's so awful and you're making me watch it slash i love it it's so awful and yet i'm so invested we're making you watch it you are the fuckers making me watch it i don't want to watch that so so my first pressing question is this for those of us who are amazing race fans uh i want to know what happened to sassy stepmom because uh she the whole thing was that she was stepmom and now it looks like her dad and her mom were back together uh i guess no one's ever gonna care about this so i just want to put it out there that it made me curious i have a feeling that when their daughter was cast on Vanderpump rules they decided to reconcile so they could both maybe get some screen time yeah that that seems to make sense because they are crazy people second of all so this frank character you know i was i was actually always on team frank a little bit here because i thought frank seemed like an all right guy jacks in like a recharge but then again i was like well but then he was going with saucy and saucy sucks now frank it turns out frank is just like a delusional fuck basically i'm a total douchebag he's a total typical la douchebag walking around talking about his commercial real estate exactly by the way ladies any of you listening i know valentine's day is coming up so if anybody if any man tries to woo you by saying that he's in commercial real estate he is a sheister yeah run away that guy's gonna cost some people a lot of money very soon and i like he's like he's like oh well uh i like these didn't fire me i i got myself fired i wanted to be fired because i have my commercial real estate it's like the burgeoning donald trump over here getting himself fired so we can build uh i don't know an outhouse and every three professional dream to get fired from waiting tables or bartending he's cuter than jacks though right he is cuter and i'm glad oh well no yeah he is jacks is not in his prime but that smile oh he has a rat smile he does have sharp little like uh baby raccoon teeth and he could not by the way he could not have been more obnoxious when meeting saucy's parents like there was no like whoa Ben what are you talking about saucy's parents are alcoholic drug addict psychopaths i know but still you don't show up and criticize your girlfriend in front of their parents and laugh about how you want to get fired and tell like it's like one of these things that like it just shows what he would be like with anyone's parents and basically talk about what a bitch your daughter is like who does that of course the parent that's how the parents were too they're like yeah what an asshole stassi is huh yeah yeah you should have seen her in high school what an ugly bitch she would i i had a tummy i love that they that stassi she used to lie on the floor and eat bread from the inside out i'm sorry stassi thinks that she is like a classy woman compared to somebody like skana shina whatever from altadena or wherever she's from azusa azusa same thing actually azusa's way worse than altadena anyway so like i love that that stassi thinks that she's a high class bitch compared to shana and then you meet stassi's parents and first of all like the dad is carrying around a flask with a gun on it and then on the other side of the flask he has a picture of his daughter like rubber banded to it and the first thing out of his mouth is or the first thing out of the mom's mouth is yeah we've been drinking all day and the dad the first thing out of his mouth is you're not a you're not a democrat right i know it's like fresh from fontana it's this rotor family i know my god they are such trash he looks like a combination of john ritter and um john denver i think i actually think that he looks like john denver meets the buffalo bill from silence of the lambs put some lotion on it honey and then the and then the mom looks like we're known as judd meets one of the daughters from just the ten of us oh definitely looks like little or finani all grown and fat and straightened hair it's jamey looner from just the ten of us slash malrose place yes jim and the holograms and winona judd i love jamey looner she's amazing she was also on savannah and the all the wv all i remember savannah that shit was perfect it was so good how did that get canceled i don't know let's bring it back starring the three of us as the three sisters well i mean we have to just hope that we don't get beaten up by the cast Savannah from rules who've been auditioning and booking gigs and trying on cowboy hats my god about horse faces audition She should have been That wasn't my mom and Elsa voice that was my horse face voice cuz Horse face very close They were probably upset though because they lost out to that Clydesdale for the Budweiser commercial at the Super Bowl Because y'all monda doesn't have enough money to buy them Let's go so let's go to soul cycle that is actually you know what the Lisa was at that Lisa Timmons was at that cycle house She was there. It's the one on La Sienna go right north of yeah, her friend right down from Lillie's house This is so fucked up. Yeah, her friend runs that that spin class and was like oh Lisa You should come spin class. They're filming something for the new sir show so Lisa went and But she didn't but she wasn't on camera. Okay next time that happens Lisa needs to put out the APB So that I can put on must spin the shoes I was actually supposed to go with her and then I didn't for some reason and I'm actually kind of glad have you guys ever spun I went to class one time. I lasted six minutes. It's the worst thing in the world Is the little seat hurts your butt see here's the thing You know it's got to be bad one cuz horseface spent the entire scene patting her face down with a towel And you know that she probably exercises every single day to keep you know looking more like a giraffe than a clod's Dale it's hard to be the hottest there's a lot of pressure to be the hottest sexiest skinniest girl sir When you're booking gigs For Poyo Loco print ads and the penny saver like that's a lot of pressure to look good for that Yeah, your actress access profile pictures really have to look decent you guys I'm doing I'm doing a spot for millions of milkshakes and it's just really important for me to look good I'm doing I just booked a gig for California chicken cafe and Like I just want to make sure I look at cuz then next week. I'm doing something for hot and juicy crawfish. Oh My god, how does that store stay in business? Hello? I'm going there today for lunch. It's Mardi Gras and They actually have a calendar. I have it right here. I have a calendar right here It's called the girls of hot and juicy crawfish Wait tonight tonight's the tonight's Mardi Gras tomorrow today. They're doing penny beers at Juicy crawfish, they would be happy because I'm Right now you need to do an Instagram photo and then make people follow you on Instagram with hot and juicy crawfish girls Oh, you know that horse face is gonna be there with a lobster on her head. Are you kidding? They don't eat food? That's true. They graze they graze they have to go out to like mount They have to go to Yolanda's grassy knoll and graze out there because there's no other grass in line You know what they do they take kale and they put it in a white paper towel and they submerge it in hot water Take it out and they squeeze a squeeze as hard as they can and the kale juice that emerges from the paper towel is probably their lunch Made baby half an hour. Did you guys notice that thing growing on Katie's chin? Yes? At first I thought it was a zit, but then I noticed it was in every shot of her So I think it might actually just be some sort of thing that she has so I think it's stupidity trying to escape Like a little monster can't get out Horrible girls and I love that they're like, oh, I hate her. I hate her. Oh, I'm gonna go talk to Stacey today Those girls are truly actresses though because that Katie girl She can turn on some fake tears like it's nobody's business Yeah But you know that Kristen is a serious beach because we saw her acting in the beginning of the episode We know that she can't think any long. I will take that serious beach over Katie and Stacey crying all over each other It was like a really bad version of the scene between Heather Graham and Julianne Morin boogie nights like you're my mom Oh, you're my mom. Oh my god. I love you. And then and then Heather Graham like dies of a cocaine over it Are somebody dies of a cocaine overdose and I wish it was both of them Stacey preferably. Yeah. Well, it was awesome watching Frank tell us Dossie and then dump her ass I really did enjoy that You're just gonna leave I'm just trying to talk to you. You're just gonna walk away I'm excuse me Did she just not walk out of her front door and leave him in her living room? And then she's gonna yell at him for walking away shut up bitch go to shut up fucking mountain bitch I've been dumped twice this summer. This is really not good. No, no Ben. That is not the quote She goes I've been twice this or I've been dumped twice this summer. What is God trying to do to kill me? I mean Stacey, Stacey is the worst. She doesn't realize that God's not trying to kill her God's trying to kill us By giving you on TV you if a strike a lightning struck her stupid head right now a lot more people would believe in God I'll tell you that I know restore faith in so many things And there's also by the way jacks and Laura Laura Lee or whatever her name is Having sex into commie Well, so what I loved is that Lisa sits them down and it's like I heard to the great vine that you do this this and so First they were like no never and then surely it's like well. I mean we had sex. It's a commie Like like oh, okay Maybe it was their security guard who called you not yours No, we definitely did not have sex in the bathroom. I would do that I do that so if the doors lost in your bathroom, you're not having sex, but this time I wasn't I'm not rude She's crazy She screams at Jackson she's going something like You may be trying to break up with me, but I will never be out of your life I know I say good for her right and good for him because that's what you get for dating him method and also I liked how he got us. I liked how also like her proclamation about like she they're having his dinner And she's she's like, you know, I have to say she's getting like choked up Like she's gonna say something like oh, you know what like you're someone like I've never had someone who really has like been so Supportive of me or really gets me, but she's like I have to say you are the most attractive person I've ever been with and I It's like a dream Good for you, Laura Lee good for you Poor thing and she of course an idiot because she should know that with a dog like like jacks the moment you start saying You know those things the moment he's gonna be like, okay, peace out. Yeah, and my boner's gone Yeah, these people are all pretty fucking disgusting and I thank God that I'm not 20 years old and gorgeous anymore Can we can we move on to some? Can we believe that shit you think I'd still be poor if I was ever 20 and gorgeous I'd be rich by now Up this can we move on to some classier people aka the Persians of Los Angeles. Yes, please. Oh my god That is like that is like so white of you to want to like talk about the shots of sunset and collect seaglass Like that's so white like Persians don't care about any of that Who collects glass on the ocean only white people do that. That's ridiculous Like, you know what Persian people do they like walk along the beach and look for hookers to wash the shore. That's what Persian people do Persian people don't look for glass on the beach. We look for gold coins. It's very You know what like this is so Persian. I think we lost Matt. Oh, is Matt back? Yes, I see his face. Oh my god. Hey, that is like that That is like so white for like home girl to like go away like that is whack like what you just did right now That's whack like that is like what my parents did from Iran. They escaped and didn't say anything Like that is whack, you know, you know like white people love saying conslang But like it is so Persian to use life from 1998 like that's so whack to do that Oh god, and not only does she say that's so whack. She says it like 20 times Like you're dating your dating Jermaine. What is his name Jermaine Jackson? You're saying whack and you're wearing like five sizes too small for you a robic's outfit from 1983 from getzooks Like what the fuck is wrong with you? So someone needs to be done with her. She's just a princess Get suits is a is a skateboard shot from the 80s. It was in malls. That's where you went to buy your like skater clothes I feel like do they have like a mascot that was like a dog with sunglasses and a baseball cap or is that just something from the Simpsons, I think that's hot and juicy crawfish So like I booked this really big gig. I'm gonna be the girl talking to dog with a sunglasses That was like half reza half horse space boys So this episode the big central theme of this episode was ace of getting ready for her Persian Priestess Persian Palooza. Okay, so I get that Music is illegal and I ran and now I see why That should be illegal and it should stay illegal because those people cannot sing I mean even the famous one she brought on was terrible and he's like the He was terrible There all I could think about was I couldn't believe how you know all the america was sitting there watching the Grammys on Sunday night Watching these great collaborations little did they realize the genius that was happening on Bravo with Asa and Andy. What a collab? Oh JT and JZ on tour. I hear You know I For me what I was amused at was how she's talking about this event like it's the second coming of Woodstock They're in the friggin Ella Ray theater. They get like like a thousand people in there You know it's like this and everyone in the line by the way was like 48 years old except for a few weird person teenagers Like this is not the exciting event But they have let us in like Ronnie could you have gotten us in with your secret powers. Yeah with your Middle Eastern connections. Yeah, I'm not Persian So weekly alert how about me not being Persian What if I brought what if I brought a bundle of parsley a pomegranate and some lavash bread Do you think we could have gotten in then oh my god? The dork man if you just showed up with a backwaxing kit What if I just wore something really form-fitting and and shimmering? Gonna think I could have gotten in yeah, we were all we were all taking a second to visualize that Yeah, I was I was taking a minute to swap swallow back what was coming up there And then I had went to MJ wearing that sparkly dress and the fact that she's getting Some play with that dude with Drizzy Drizzy You know, I think MJ's mom had it right. She's like why don't you wear something that is more flowing it doesn't have to stick to the body It ain't your mom may be a bitch, but it doesn't mean she's wrong. Yeah Just cuz she has drag queen lipstick doesn't mean she has no fashion sense Babe, you dress like a hoe. You're a drunk You don't ever go to work. I mean your mom kind of has a point Yeah, let the fuck up and listen your mom for once. Yeah, the mom just wants her to snag a man You know, that's legit before the mom dies. I mean, that's all she wants has the mom. I'm like the mom Yeah, mom - do we think the mom's mad drizzy yet? Oh, no, no way Who is this man? Who is this man that you bring here? Why do you take this man? Why don't you get a good mom? I love then she gets sidetracked and she goes. Oh, let's go to lunch No, actually, my favorite thing was watching You park so far away from me curb, what are you trying to make me break my ankles? Why don't you move forward? Why do you do everything? You say it's perfect. Why do you say that? It's the same accent that I do for Lenny's mom from Real Housewives of Miami to see, you know Very small repertoire you're so international. I know speaking of Ronnie. Did you get that international mail catalog yet? You know what come to think of it. I have not and I'm kind of upset about it. Although I It's building in West Hollywood. So that shit might have been snagged off my front stoop. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, I wouldn't be surprised Also, male people, you know how the male the post office is closing for yet another day because they can't seem to keep their shit together Yeah, you know why because they're fucking terrible. They are so stupid. I get like five of my neighbor's mail here I don't know where the hell my mail's even going I think we need to just open like a weekly collective where we talk about what we got in the mail and see who has each other shit Stupid post office. Okay, that's enough of that. They need to make a sale about the post office So we can complain about that for an hour. Oh, we probably will probably be like Oh, there will definitely be a West Hollywood post office. They'll be like post office 90069 That's Hollywood post office. You don't even want to mess around in there I've seen some drag queens fighting with some big black post office ladies and it got ugly And you know what that would make for fucking great TV It would be if you like at this post office the drama is signed sealed and delivered See we're already writing it right? There is like supposed to work that has like crazy plastic surgery drinking champagne That's how it would be done in bravo. You like Taylor Armstrong work at the post office Seasoned here Armstrong's gone postal. Hey, Kennedy was just in one of those cars. Did someone roll that away? Kennedy Kennedy. I love it next week. She loses Kent. She forgets it where Kennedy is Before she runs off with her new boyfriend. He's married with The look of horror on Kyle and Kim's faces is amazing when they're like, okay We may be assholes and we may be alcoholics, but this woman doesn't even know where her child is her five-year-old child Okay, so Shaza sense it so MJ goes to have a peaceful day with her mother and Decides that she's gonna do she's gonna do some hot guy a favor and be his girlfriend Which I don't know where MJ gets her line of thinking, but I kind of like it. I kind of like her delusion And then Mike Mike asked for his parents approval In their their shiny gold living room. Oh my god Looks like a mini Versailles in there. Oh, you know what? I like his parents and I like what his dad said that they were very nice when you can windex your furniture my Sithy my grandma my Lebanese grandmother used to cover the furniture and plastic like that and she would windex that shit and it was fine Yeah, I Like when everything looks like it's made from recycled Cycle plates from an Indian restaurant. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Well, I love that the mother gave her Approval as long as you are happy Mike and then the father's like no, I don't agree And he's basically on the racist podcast We've gone Ronnie's racist corner We're adding that that's a new segment market Johnny note That's actually a pretty language. I should have meant that It'll be called racist queen on a podcast So she the dad is all upset because she doesn't know English and he can't speak his heart And I'm thinking how long have you fucking been here? Why don't you learn English and stop blaming Americans for not being able to understand your heart What are you gonna? What do you have to say anyway at this point? You said it all No kidding. Save your ears. Yeah, and then let's see Lily So lily I like had to break up with Ollie because he was being like really mean to me He wasn't like cookie flutter nutter butter fluffer Like the trust was gone and when the trust is gone, like you cannot get it back I'm I'm just gonna say right now five years ago, and I still can't trust him I can't this pomegranates really tasty. It's made me feel a lot better also Ben Ben this Maybe your best impression this might even be better than candy better than totally Lilies really good better than my Thomas Kramer guys. It's it's up there with your Thomas Kramer. I'm just saying Lily is now Officially part of your repertoire now. It's okay. I'm slowly growing and candy Candy's like I'm gonna do some gospel. I'm gonna do some gospel and press rally Terrible Okay Okay, okay, okay your shots of sunset, what do we think about Lily trying to be BFF with Asa now I Think that like they're totally opposite, but we like get each other like I Love us like I think like us and I shouldn't be friends, but we're like so friends And also also is the only one who doesn't get shit faced whenever they go out And I think Lily feels comfortable. I mean Lily really it's a stick in the mud She's fun to watch because she's such an idiot, but she's she doesn't have sex and she doesn't drink boring Yeah, she doesn't really fit in. I mean it's just supposed to be back crazy pursies. Yeah, I don't know I like Lily though. I actually think I like Lily the most to be honest. No, I love her, too What do we think about Reza and the boyfriend? The boyfriend yes, the boyfriend one I hit that I don't know the boyfriend seems prissy and and I think the boyfriend can do a lot Better. I mean I understand why he's prissy because he's dealing with Reza. I don't know Why can't I ever find a guy with a sweat fatty gross Middle Eastern fetish? I think that the boyfriend is clearly a gold digger, and he wants Reza for his money And therefore he puts up with all of Reza's nastiness Yeah, when he was shoving that like cupcake in Reza's mustache It was just like there's just all this frosting just stuck in the bristles I was like that's not coming out for three more weeks, you know I think that the boyfriend is a perfect example of how insecure gay people are it's like, okay Here's a guy who won't stay true to me. He's obviously cheating on me. I'll openly cheating on me He won't commit to me after dating for years. Haven't they been together for a long time? I think a year a year Wow So after after a year he still won't commit to me And I'm gonna just sit around and be desperate for this fucking guy like wake up homosexuals You don't need to put up with disgusting Reza's With your alley Mcbeal DVD's and listening to our podcast home alone with a lean cuisine and a bottle of rosé Do not waste your time with these fat nasty pieces of trash Please tell me that there are guys who Like don't cheat on you all the time and actually want a relationship, right? Excuse me. Why do you think I'm so single? I can't handle all of this like I feel like everybody only wants to be a hoe Nobody will commit. Are you kidding? Okay, everybody on okay. Keep it's a hoe and nobody will come in no one will commit no one will commit There's something new and flashy and shiny that comes on by and you know gay is with something new and flashy and shiny They're distractions, and they can't you stay focused. I do know how persons love the flashy and shiny gold They don't like glass, but they like gold and shiny someone's like did you see that furniture set at Mike's parents house? I want to date it So I'm sorry. Oh my god. That's so Persian. That's like that's like so Persian to want to like Dance around and like go sit in a gold chair Homegirl you can't be you can't be faithful to one person This makes me crazy. It's so gross. He said he should feel lucky to have a cute guy who likes him I just think the thought of having sex with Reza is just the most terrifying thing. I could think I can't imagine the noises he would make Like a hippopotamus and heat or something Mustache that mustache. Oh the hair product alone. All of it. All of it. Oh, you think that's the only place where he has a mustache I mean, oh, I don't even want to think about that That's how we do it in Persia We like to get hairy all over It's like so Persian to keep yourself hairy and not to groom yourself a Valentine's Day We call it trimming the pushes It's a family activity Okay, I'm not the bomb. This is the worst Mardi Gras of all time. Wait, so do we have any other thoughts before we move on to Atlanta? Goldenessa. Oh, yeah. Oh, poor Gigi's all alone And that's all we have to say that as a gay boyfriend in Texas, so I am just excited that at the end of the episode They were like and next week on reunion part one, which means we get multiple episodes I'm excited. I'm excited for that. Oh, and that's one and now we know why MJ is not speaking to anybody. Yeah, cuz they all beat her up. Yeah, they all think she's on pills Yeah, they all accuse her of being a drug addict on national TV, which obviously she is so but still I mean, I'm not gonna go on TV and say maps of drug addict. Yeah, I like Matt I'm on Vicodin and we speak Ron. He's like I will only say that on Twitter Don't you dare tweet about Bernie shame on you shame on you Oh, this is a real boring episode. This is a real boring episode I still love for sure cuz Jesus. She's boring. Yeah, I do she's hilarious. I really wish that I had started a Recording all of these episodes on on my computer so that I could cut out the stupidity that is Porsche is English I mean that needs to be somewhere. Oh, yeah, what she did she say something dumb this week that didn't make any sense. Oh my god She was perturbed. Oh Her thing she had like three or four of them and I I was too Not present I was to take it out to write him down this woman Portia. She makes Cynthia Bailey look smart That is a serious problem. I know Cynthia Bailey doesn't even have to put on her smart glasses to look smart when she Cynthia Bailey when she puts on those fake smart glasses on a fedora. I just want to punch her But to be fair though Cynthia does have some like bitchy queens working under her at her agency Oh, what assholes what ass they basically act like they are will Amina and you know They sit there in the window just I think trying to make it look like from the outside There is anyone in the stupid Asians the only person that should ever be sitting in a window is Pearl from 227 you bitches It's straight Like Nini had bad reception in the Hollywood Hills, which is so true I mean Ben we live at the foothills of the Hollywood Hills, and I will say my Verizon sucks here My Verizon works, but that's cuz I'm not as high up as you. Oh What what yeah, and then also Only enjoyed the scene of Portia and her husband well Cynthia tried to make me feel bad and I don't appreciate that and she tried to tell me you better check it You hear me you bet check that you better check it. Don't wreck it check it and I'll get it Oh my god, can we need to talk about that scene? I'd be more like a river and less like a lake. You got it. That's what you guys keep talking I have some calling me Can you hear that Get the impression that that is like a fucked-up relationship that they have like he was kind of scaring me Yeah, he suddenly became a typical real house wife's husband when he showed his misogynistic side, I mean it totally came out that was I have to say because he doesn't know English so like between him and Portia. I'm surprised They don't just run to each other. They're both fucking idiots, but I love Now listen here. I don't like seeing you to fight like that That's ridiculous the way you talk like that you two need to stop talking like get together you two I want you to be like clouds and I want you to be less like heels. You understand Happy black history month's for you, Ronnie. Yeah, you guys, but is that an exaggeration? My favorite part of the episode was actually not even that funny. I just liked watching candies singing doing her gospel thing Critical idea for an album you just released a line of anal beads a dildo And I love it. She doesn't even get it. She's like well Everybody think you're gonna be crazy because I'm candy and I'm making a gospel No, no, you want to do that. Oh, yeah, I'm candy Burris and I want to make a gospel album But I gotta make a little different for Ronnie Riley Two seasons ago. She was making a dance record with Kim last season She's hanging out with Jody Messina trying to make a country record now. She's making a gospel record What will she be making next season? Edm her and David geta I feel like she can do a good gospel album. So I'm I'm she flies above all the haters She certainly does. Yeah, and that plane she bought with cash And he had you buy that well, that'd be cash a credit member What else happened in this one? Um, Porsche got fired. I mean if you're getting fired by dumbass Cynthia That's pretty sad. Yeah, that's pretty much the low point in your career if Cynthia asked her relieve you of some duties Kenya, oh the best part for me was Kenya's bullshit cancer scare Give me a break woman and who pointed out that her doctor was the same doctor who's gonna be on this medical Live show or whatever. Is she back door pilot back to someone someone said that she was so I think that whole thing was bullshit I was like that. I've never seen a doctor with such bad hair And if that was a real doctor, she would have said I tested you Kenya. You are cancer. Yeah, you are a cancer on this world I just love that the doctor was so cruel because the doctor was like, well, we have the results of the biopsy back And what we found out is that when we looked at the right breast We found something And what that was Was something that I'm going to tell you about in about 10 seconds. Hold on. We're a little bit longer. Well, mad at him was Not cancer A lot car in your right breast Congratulations, you know, it's keyless, right? Just walk near it in the doors will unlock I didn't think that was kind of gross to see like the pus and blood dripping out onto that gauzy pad Did we need to see that that was from like some dying kitty? I don't even believe any of that was real. Can you just full of shit? That was a bunch of bull That's what that's what's inside of Kenya's body, you know, just a lot of dead kitty Yeah, that was that's where that's where a butt is made of dead kitty Oh That was a lot of that stuff that they pack boxes with you know that little packet of silica Can you square tits or packed with that? And that's what they were taking out of there I don't buy it. Can you I don't buy you your fake ass cancer story Um, I don't know what did it. I don't think anything else happened on this episode I think there was literally nothing fajor did fajor do something fajor went over to candies place I think and then they they made no food, right? I think that was Yeah, it was this week and the first thing candy says to fajor is would you like some sweet tea or some Kool-Aid? Oh, yeah, candy was like it was like it was like the the ins and outs of how to make lipton iced tea from powder Just like oh, I put a little bit of extra because that's where rah, I likes it I like it like a lot of extra powder in it. How does mama Joyce like it? Stop there. I didn't like that tea start with a big old penis like that candy I was disrespectful That was raw. I'm leaving candy I live for mama Joyce. She's still not over that big old dick swinging in her face Oh, good type of choice Okay, so we're done with that one. Um, so now all we have is top chef top chef How long are we gonna drag out fucking top chef? Okay, we've got this week, which is normally isn't this normally the finale? Or I guess they do go there. They're gonna bring back one or two people from last chance kitchen, right? Who won last chance kitchen Kristin beats, um, she beats Stefan in last chance kitchen. So she's coming back I don't like that. She also beat that she also beat the girl. Uh, what was her name? I don't know any lizzy lizzy is lizzy I was really sad because I liked lizzy And it sounded like when tom was tasting the food that he actually liked lizzy So I was sad because I feel like they're just like, okay, Kristin. This is yours and I know that they're not going to give it to Whoever gets kicked off this week. Wait, who has to go up against Yeah last last canch kitchen kitchen. I believe is done now and so One more round. I think he said Someone else too. She beat lizzy. So lizzy's done. And by the way, I loved lizzy and the whole like dead dad and the whole Um, like he was a fisherman's story like I did He has a fish on man. He has a he has a fish in it. I can't do her accident. So weird. I loved her I loved her and I love that story and I I don't know I think last chance kitchen is bullshit and josh josh and has gotten bacon and stupid fucking moustache need to leave I agree and the bacon is ridiculous. It's just gross at this point But not but I have a question though. So last chance kitchen So someone's coming back from that but they've been also talking that there's someone else That the viewers vote on that gets to get the same It's just ridiculous if you get voted out of the show you should not be able to get back in that is the end I like last chance kitchen. I think last chance. I like Okay, but ben, why don't they why do they get to come back immediately to the finale? That's stupid Yeah, I agree. They shouldn't be able to come back Well, but again, it is too late in the season Well, it makes sense though if you think about it because if someone is eliminated far In the in the past and they are able to get as far that far down beat all those people one-on-one They sort of do kind of deserve a spot in the finale because that's a really hard thing to do And or if you make it that far, but then someone later in the season gets eliminated Um, and then beats you in the last chance kitchen. Okay, why don't you slip in slip into brooks chef clogs for a second and just realize that she Should be winning this entire season because she can take out that mustachioed bacon fucker And they're gonna bring christen back at the last second She's gonna swoop in and steal the fucking win, but she already was eliminated. Yeah I mean, I just don't like christen, but I think it's fucked up I thought that she's gonna come back and take the win and that's where it's going and it might be but I think as it goes on It might be hard for the judges to give it to her like that They might stick with somebody who's been on like brook, you know And I do agree that brook has a chance to take it But of course I thought it was gonna be an old woman finale and it's so not so I know they definitely want to have another woman when I get it I mean there's only been one stephanie. I want to say so I mean, you know I'm not brook's biggest fan by any means and I do miss lizzy But I just and I like christen too, but I just feel like brook deserves it more than christen Yeah, brook is good. I think brook is good. And if and if you want, maybe we should go down to one of her restaurants I mean she's in this area Let's do it. Yeah, I've been to she She has two places one called the Hudson house and one called the triple and I've been to the triple twice And it's delicious. It's truly delicious So if you guys want to go in a place on bentura called black market and one of the girls from top chef runs that place and it's delicious Oh, yeah, which one does black market? I forget I don't know, but I know that is amtonia I don't know. I love antonia. Jamie gets fired from every place that she's ever worked. I know I actually like her last restaurant No, no, she was so close. She drove leichwood into and she was also at beechwood Which she drove into the ground, but then she was at wolfslayer, which I actually liked Um, but you know what though I don't blame that one failing on her I blame it on the shot as a sunset because they shot a scene there And as we all know every place that they go to close us down shut it down So I blame I blame gg. I know me for closing down wolfslayers. I really like wolfslayer was really really good So i'm really bummed about that Uh, well, the food at vaudeville was actually pretty good, but she did She served she served these weird sliders that were good. They weren't burger sliders They were some other like crackcake sliders that were really good, but she served them on like little dinner rolls from rouse It's like it'll come on now make an effort. Yeah, she's no good. But anyway for this season. I really like Um, I really like the chefs that they have left for the most part except the mustache guy, but even him I don't hate him. I don't hate him. I don't hate him. I don't hate him He's been doing well enough that i've moved from hating him to just disliking him Yeah, i'm just like sick. I just don't like when people identify themselves by one quality like yeah, oh, i'm gay or oh I'm person or oh, I like bacon. Yeah, or like, oh, I don't know how to cook this I only know how to cook bacon because i'm from oklahoma Like you know be a little bit like that's to me. It's not a top chef quality Yeah, agreed. Um, so let's make bets. Who do you think is going to be the most popular chef to come back? Um I don't know for a while there. I thought it was going to be the japanese girl, but now she's no longer in the running It's like cj versus someone else Which is fucking disgusting unless cj comes back in christian whoops his ass again, which I would love I would like cj to never come back He's horrible. Yeah, he is Um, so are we done with that? Who do you think we're done? I'm gonna say brook I'm gonna say brook too, and I hope it's brook. I hope it's brook, but i'm gonna say christian But I think we don't find out for three more weeks anyway Yes, oh no way at least three more because this you know when they went to elaska, I sort of thought they were beginning the finale But actually it seems like this is like the the pre that was the appetizer that was the appetizers the main course But I have to say you know, I have to I've never actually had any interest in going to elaska But these episodes in in elaska have actually made me really want to go up there Virgin america just sent me an email today. We can go to anchorage for uh on from la x to anchorage Let's do it. Why don't we like reach out to? Someone in elaska like someone who has power and say we'll do our podcast from elaska if you fly us up there I'm in and by the way anybody who's listening if you want to fly us the three of us are will we you can book us? Yeah, you won't walk us. We won't we will podcast from your deck your living room your restaurant your hot tub your restaurant Whatever we're we're we're available. You have to you have to just pay for us. There's a fly us everywhere Yes, we don't want to spend a dime if you're gonna do this that would be awesome if that was we had that listener who's like, oh We must have one sugar daddy listening. That's like, hey, I want to bring three gay dudes to my is there anyone in miami? Maybe oh miami. I've never been either of yeah, leah why we should end up leah. She's a gay dude that loves us like leah listen Why don't you know surely you don't mind paying for our three round trip tickets from la to miami, right? A drop in the bucket, honey I agree. Yeah, we'll we'll protect you from your leah black gala ball scandal. Yeah I say why don't we crash the the black ball this year? Let's just do it. Let's just go I'm not pulling a christie at that thing. Look what happened to her. She was run out of town. Yeah. Yeah, I don't want to go to the black ball I just want to go. She's living in alaska right now. You want someone to fly you out there called christie Yeah, why don't we go to come and go to purge a palooza this year? I did some google searches and I couldn't find it anywhere. Oh, so they're not inviting asa back I don't asa may have killed it. I think asa made purge a palooza didn't she I feel like I feel like she like invent purge a Palooza. Is that a real thing? Maybe she made her mom go to work while she does nothing and then her parents are poor But she made her mom spend all of her last dimes on yeah I think that she produced that because she had that big trailer. I mean she wasn't given that come on now I think that's pretty much she bought a star wagon. Yes. She's like the star tours bus I think that she totally she totally rigged that that was her production, wasn't it? I don't know You really think so? I think it's fair to say that after asa performed and was like, you know what? I think they have the right idea in Iran. I think we should just stop with our music Yeah, let's just let's just go back to planks gravel and making good bread for each other and burnt rice. Yeah, come on guys All right. Well, I think we're done, eh? I think I think Ben I think Ben needs some some hot and juicy crawfish I need to go get a CT scan. What are you gonna be up to for the rest of the day, ronnie? I'm gonna be working on my Beverly Hills redib All right, well, thank you all for listening Definitely leave us a comment on iTunes. You know I live for them And then you can also follow us on facebook Backslash watch what crappins you can follow ben on twitter at beside blog you can follow ronnie at tv gas And you can follow me matt at life on the em list and you should also start following us on instagram god damn it Yeah Yeah, and also Come to our facebook page because I'm posting my real housewise Recaps and my redubs there. So come on over guys. Yeah All right. Bye everyone. Bye guys If you like listening to comedy try watching it on the internet The folks behind the side show network of launch the new youtube channel called wait for it It's got interviews with comedians like Reggie Watts taught glass lies a slice finger Slicing driving friends with it for 10 years one of the funniest people out there and I still have a hard time with the last name liza our very own own benjamin that's me Takes you on a musical journey down internet rabbit holes and much more You don't have to wait any longer just go to youtube.com slash wait for it comedy There's no need to wait for it anymore Because it's here and it's funny and I love you A few days ago brook two dean posted an inspirational quote on her wall They got 17 likes and three comments thumbs up brook Geico also wants to make a comment in just 15 minutes You could save hundreds of dollars on your car insurance by switching to geico and nothing says inspiration better than saving money Well, except for those posters that say things like teamwork excellence and make it happen Hashtag keep climbing hashtag savings geico 15 minutes could save you 15 percent or more on car insurance If you like watch what crappins you can listen ad-free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on apple podcasts prime members can listen ad-free on amazon music before you go Tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey at wondery.com slash survey Are you in trouble with the law? 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