Drag Wars, Musical Battles, and a Crane
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#47: Drag Wars, Musical Battles, and a Crane
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We've got it all in one place. Download the Instacart app and get delivery in as fast as 30 minutes. Plus, enjoy zero dollar delivery fees on your first three orders. Offer valid for a limited time, minimum $10 per order, service fees, other fees, and additional term supply. Instacart, bringing the store to your door this Halloween. [Music] Hey everybody, welcome to Watch What Crapins, a podcast dedicated to all that crap we love to watch on Bravo. My name is Matt Whitfield from Yahoo, and joining me as always are my trusty pals, Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam say hello boys. Hello, everybody. I'm Ben. In case you know that's Ben. In case you're listening for the first time, I'm Ben. And before we get into, we have a lot to talk about today. We're gonna talk about so much. Oh my god. We have all three of the housewives franchises, Beverly Hills, Atlanta, and Miami to discuss. Before that, we will be talking about Silicon Valley due to the crazy demand on our Facebook page. We'll also touch on Million Dollar Decorators and Top Chef. But before we do that, we got to give some some social mentions. You guys should definitely follow us on Twitter @whatcrapins. I am @lifeontheamlist. Ben is @bsideblog, Ronnie is @TVgasm, and you should also follow us on Facebook and interact with us there. We are at Facebook.slash or Watch What Crapins, and leave us a comment on iTunes because you guys are amazing and the ones of you that interact with us. We love you especially, but we want more of you to interact with us and tell us how dumb we are. So where should we jump in? Should we start with Million Dollar Decorators, which is secretly our guilty pleasure? Oh, I think that sounds like a wonderful idea. What do we call this table? Oh my goodness. Oh, this marble table is beautiful. But how do we get it in? How do we get into the apartment? How do we get into the table? I want the mayor here for a ribbon cutting for this table to go up. I've never had a queen for a table before. I can't wait. You got it fresh and easy to buy some discounted produce, and he did on a giant marble table. He's hilarious. I love how he's just so full of himself. He's like, "I'm not Lord's Beloved. What if the premier design isn't America?" I got to ask you guys this, but do you think that he takes himself seriously, or is he like playing a character at this point? Oddly enough, I secretly feel like he's actually super nice. He is super nice. I hate her. He does take himself seriously. I think he does. He's like an old lady from the south. I met him at the Abbey wearing an ascot. The guy takes himself seriously. Come on. He loves an ascot. So obviously, a million-dollar decorators is back. I didn't really watch it very much last season. I watched one episode, but this time I'm like, "I'm going to jump into it." I loved it. Maybe it's because I've had a new interest in these real estate and home decorating shows. But man, was I totally on board with this promo? I could have sworn that you were obsessed with it last year. Were you just lying to me? No, I wasn't really obsessed. I quietly enjoyed it, but I didn't really watch it too carefully, but I'm going to be obsessed. Okay, well, there were only seven episodes, so that's not too too bad on your part, but Ronnie, did you watch season one? I stopped about halfway through. I got kind of bored, but it looks like this here. They're going to be adding a lot of drama in there. I don't know if I want to see these people fight necessarily, but it looks like they're going to. Oh, I want to. There are too many funny accents and to not enjoy. Too many funny accents and too many people taking themselves away too seriously. No, I have to say, so Martin Lawrence, he had the big A story of the episode, which was that he was decorating the apartment of Tamara or whatever, creator Jimmy Choo. Throughout the whole episode, they are pointing out different things, like $20,000 for chairs, $50,000 for a table, $30,000 for a chandelier. And then it turns out that they have to move this giant marble slab of the table via crane. And they're like, it's going to be over $10,000. And he's like, what? $10,000? It's like, you realize he spent like $75,000 on an ashtray, right? Just listening to you describe the episode that we all watched makes me really embarrassed that I'm obsessed with this, because I'm like, I just spent an hour of my life watching people move a marble slab with a crane. I was, by the way, on the edge of my seat. What does that say about us? Easily entertained. But that guy is so dramatic. Everything that happens is like the end of the world. Every episode is something the wrong pain. This is the wrong tone of pain. I'm going to bring down glows. I'm going to bring them down. He's always the one with the dramatic music pumping at the end. Like, will it happen or will it not happen? Will the crane break and will the table kill someone? And who designs a 3,000 pound table for an apartment in New York? I mean, come on now. My lord's belong. He says that's for the 70s, but in the 70s, they did not use cranes like that. So stop it. I also love this random little thing at the end where there's someone raw, someone stole his fireplace. Like, what? Like, are we going to follow up on that? Are they going to find this guy? Or is that just like, oh, he just got caught? What happened there? There's going to be an episode of America's Most Wanted dedicated to that, but there should be. I'd watch it. Oh, I would totally watch it. House hunters, hunters. Is anybody feeling the other cast members or are you guys only loving Martin Lawrence-Billard? Because my favorite is secretly, well, not so secretly, Mary MacDonald is just shit. She's great. I love that she's like sort of like a super bitch, but she sort of, she knows how to push back against these women. Like, what was that woman? You're paying for it. I can't really. She talks about Karen. She talks about having a villain. Great. I was just going to say it's becoming Leah Black meets Karen Walker. Well, it wasn't she the inspiration for Karen Walker? No, she said that was a rumor. Oh, well, it's a good rumor to have. Yeah, we should. I shouldn't have said that. We should just keep it going. Way to improv there, Ronnie. No. Always say no. No and. No, I think that I actually think she's great. I think she's like a firecracker. Well, this is the name of the woman she was working for again. She has some really funny name like Carly Fitzpoochie or something like that. I don't remember, but did you like? She's insanely rich. She'll spend so much. I don't even care. She's just insanely rich. I love her. And she's like, you're going to pay for it because you're the one who signed off on it. I love her sticking with the crazy old ladies. I'm taking this green wallpaper down. That's a great thing about Mary MacDonald. She's just like painfully honest and she'll just go and she'll be like, I know they're rich and I'm going to make them spend all their money and give it to me. Yeah. And then when they say something to her, she's just like, no. What's Catherine Ireland doing? She's just like, I'm going to the game of my social, the maid. My kids hang out. Will I get my ovaries massaged via my foot? That's like my soul in me. I think that'd be on my ovaries. Do not want to be thinking about your ovaries right now. I just want to know if she realizes that her maid seems to have stepped out of a murder mystery because she is clearly a murderer or has witnessed a murder. She's an agatha. She's an agatha Christie character. She certainly is. And I mean, honestly, at this point, there is such a subset of these maids and servants on all these broader shows that we may have to do a list of our favorite maids and helpers. I think maybe for the end of the year, it makes me actually never want to get a maid. I mean, where have we come to in this country where maids have this much power? I've never seen a maid with this much power. Our maid used to sleep behind the washing machine. It was also an oversized rat with a bonnet on. Pretty much. Just call our mom and give her a hair in it and that's our girl. Yeah, I said really, the only dud of the show is the pretty gay guy who was so he's so boring. He only appeared in the pod buster. That's on the premiere episode that's all he got. That's how boring he is. Yeah, I mean, they did cut. They cut one of the guys from last year that was like Mary's protégé who didn't really have much of a storyline. And this year, it's kind of like Jeffrey Allen Mark's jam, if you will. I kind of don't care. I just need really Katherine Martin and Mary. I mean, they're the three stars, right? Yeah, I dick. You know why? Because they're the most flamboyant we get. Even the Martin Lawrence Blards, the only gay one. The other two are basically like drag. Yeah. Mary Mary is the gayest man I've ever met. The gayest gay man I've ever met. I thought the gay couple was pretty funny. The only scene they show them and they're getting trashed, they're just like staring at each other during dinner, getting trashed. That's so funny. It's like long-term relationship. Five bottles of wine. I don't come back because I've got some ice cream and I'm a bit eating it. All right. You know that wasn't him at a pretty one again. What's his name? I don't pay attention to him. Because he's just too young and gorgeous for me to-- Oh, no, no. I met like the older, the older pretty one. Because I met him, I guess about a year and a half ago in Bravo had some sort of up-fronts thing. And this was about three months before the first season even aired and they brought these guys through. So since I'm just a blogger on this red carpet, I'm not entering the weekly. I get stuck with a million-dollar decorator people. So I have no idea who this guy was. And I had no idea what a million-dollar decorator was. So I thought it was like a show where they try to make your place look like it's a million dollars. So I said, "Hey, can you come to create my place? I've got a one bedroom." He looked at me and was like, "Uh, no." Yeah, when I got my place, I tweeted Mary MacDonald and I was like, "Oh, I bought your book. That means you should definitely come do a room in my house." And she tweeted me back. She's like, "I may buy you a drink, but that's it." I was like, "Oh, shit, Mary." But that makes me like her even more because she's a tough bitch. You don't want her to do anything in her house. She would trust. She would cost so much damn money. I mean, these people- I don't care. Month loans below. These chests are only $50,000 each. Let's buy 30. If I had a ton of money, I would have each of those three come and do a different room in my house. I would love that. It should be a Bravo special. Bravo, if you are listening, can we make this happen? I will let them do whatever crazy fucking shit they want in my house. You know what? Next time I run into Martin Lawrence Bellard by the chicken tenders at Fresh and Easy, I'm going to tell him, "You have to come on to our podcast because I would love to have them on." Or Mary MacDonald, obviously, but I just haven't seen her in any of my supermarkets. So, I don't know if it's going to happen. All right, let's move on. Let's move on. This is- I'm bored with this damn show. I'm bored enough while I watch this show. Let's move. Okay, Top Chef, Top Chef, is anybody watching or caring this season? I'm really not loving the cast. I'm going to be honest. I'm totally into it. I'm totally watching it. I really like it. I love that the veterans that they brought back, that they totally, you know, fell on their faces this episode. I'm not feeling the veterans twist. I feel like it's so unnecessary. I feel like it's like Big Brother. It's like, can we just deal with the fresh cast and then we can get to another All-Stars eventually? Well, they wanted to do an All-Stars. It seems like they didn't have the balls to do an All-Stars, you know. Don't pun intended because CJ only has one ball. They didn't have the balls for an All-Stars. Hey, it's the season of the single net because there's that One-Neted guy on Project Runaway All-Stars too. One-Net 2012, you heard it. You know, I had to say, if they were going to bring back veterans, I mean, I was happy to see Josie back. You know, Stefan, like, he's like, whatever. I find him to be annoying. And CJ, I never thought that CJ seemed like a very good chef, to be honest. Well, I don't like that Josie is like the voice of... Yeah, he did. But I don't like that Josie is like the voice of the master. She's like, you guys, here's how it is, okay? This is how it feels when you're in the room waiting to hear. You know, this is what you're going to feel. You're going to doubt yourself, guys, but don't doubt yourself. It's like, listen up, Goofy. You should be doubting yourself because you were one of the biggest damn fools I ever saw on this show. So shut your face. I fucking hate people like that. No, she didn't make it that far. And I can hate people that talk like that. I just want to punch them in the face. But that being said, she looks 10 times better now. Well, yeah, she doesn't have a ridiculous haircut. Oh, she's still annoying and ridiculous, but the hair is a little bit better. Here's a lot better. No, I don't like her teeth. I don't like her mouth. It freaks me out. I think it was a ripoff that Stefan didn't get kicked off because these guys are supposed to be the veterans and he made dry duck. I think that he should have been gone. And especially his arrogant ass attitude, I thought I would just have loved to see him go. Instead, they got rid of that cute little gay guy who's defying the odds and marrying a dude. Yeah, you knew you knew his time was limited when they started giving him a backstory out of nowhere in the middle of the episode. I was like, Oh, okay. So he's either winning or losing. And when they said that his team had like dry fish, I'm like, okay, he's going home. Yeah, that was a little that that foreshadow was beating us over the head. It was like, okay, pack your bags, pack your knives. Meanwhile, Carla, that name Carla, the one who lastly we called as Hispanic ish or whatever. That was not me who said that by the way. She's crazy. Carla, what's her, what's her last name again? Carla Ray Jepsen. Yeah, Carla Ray Jepsen. Carla Rao, Jepsen, because she's some people calling me a bitch and some kind of a bitch. How does she talk? You do it. I don't know. I like that you just cracked yourself up. I was like, Oh, okay. I need to look gritty in the kitchen. You can still have a lady. I'm going to cut my finger off a burst of eggs. Where's the paprika? She's ridiculous. And I think there's going to be so many crazy ass people. There's that girl, then there's that little hit guy. He's like, everyone thinks I'm just a short guy from Oklahoma. I'm going to show them. I'm like, uh, yep, you sure showed them you're a short, bitter guy from Oklahoma. I think a leprechaun. I don't know. You're being generous. I can't remember anyone else on my cast. Do I remember? Let me let me ask you guys this. Um, obviously, how are you guys feeling about like the judging situation and all of like the all star judges that are in rotation this year? What's your take on that at this point? I'm the same as I was last week, which is still Hayden on you, right? But we didn't have you. We had luckily we had Gail. We had exactly Gail was back. Um, I love Gail. And I love, I love the way Padma treats Gail. Quietly dismissive. Every time every time Padma opens her mouth with a criticism or a critique, I just it gets on my last fucking nerve. It's like, shut up, supermodel. You make some crappy, some crappy cookbook because your husband had a good deal with the publisher. Shut up. You are no expert. Go put on your fur bikini and keep your mouth set. But but she does keep giving Gail the stick. I mean, she's given Gail the stink eye from day one and part of me is like it should be the other way around. You know, I think I've told this on the podcast before. I don't remember or not, but my friend I used to have a running joke, which is to have Padma. We always imagine Padma being just totally a past aggressive bitch to Gail. I mean, like, well, this food is delicious and I'm too hungry, but I'm not that Gail 10 seconds here, pass along to Gail. She'll eat it, everyone. Don't you worry. You always imagine Gail being like, what? My dear friend Gail Simmons. She, uh, she loves dessert. I mean, I don't have a stomach for it, but Gail, she's a hearty lady. Yeah. Speaking of the best show ever in Bravo's history, besides making me a supermodel, was Top Chef just desserts and that fucking shit needs to come back. I know. Well, they mess up the second season by making it too straight. I know. They really did. Yeah, they did because I couldn't even get the whole way through that season. And that's saying something because I love that gay show. Yeah. That was a real like, that was a real caddy show. It was like, it was the gay count of part of Top Chef, which is the map, the one masked show on Bravo. That show is what queer as folks should have been. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Let's move on quickly and talk briefly about the silicon, whatever, the startups of something else that called it. So bad. I don't even know the title. Startups of Silicon Valley. Okay. So I'll work. Because a few of you on our Facebook page, again, Facebook dot com slash watch what crap happens have demanded that we talk about this show. We did watch it. It is still terrible. It is worse than misadvised. And that is saying a lot. Which one? Silicon. No, it's not. You're crazy. I love that. So Oh my god. You had a date sheet on me. I think I like that. So I think that so is so funny. And they're all so crazy. They're just young. I think maybe we're all better because they're maybe younger. They're all hateable. Like they are absolutely hateable. I'm like, gals were they're hateable, but you secretly love them. Yeah. They're just these people just are like hateable and boring, I think. But tell us, Rodney, why did that girl throw water in the guy's face? Okay, there's this girl who thinks that she's really beautiful. But in real life, she looks like Becky from Roseanne. Okay. Yeah. Becky. Number one. Yeah. With that booby face. Like it with that face. It looks like she's always taking a poop in her pants. Let's see, Gordon's son. Is that her name? I think went there on the mental list or something. And I was like, Oh, no, she's still trying. So anyway, that girl sees on this show. And she's really obnoxious. And she thinks she's all gorgeous. And she's the one on the show that makes comments like, you know, normally brains don't come in a package like this. And she lives for free at this at the four seasons, I believe it's the four seasons. Because she does their social media. And she calls them to bring her dog breakfast, which is like steak or whatever. She's a snotty idiot who never pays for anything basically. She's like a holder on. And her job is live casting, which means she just turns on a camera and lets everybody watch her, you know, like, so apparently she would wear a camera on her head so you can see everything she sees. And then there were cameras all over her house. You could just watch her walk around and poop or whatever you feel like watching her splash. But she doesn't even do anything. She just lets people seem just have to tell. Here's the moral of that story. That is not a fucking job. Well, it is now. Welcome to 2012, baby. So anyway, this girl apparently makes money from advertisers and stuff. And she's like, a blog post for me is worth like $10,000. So she goes to these companies and offers them her, you know, a blog post and they give her all this free shit. So she's a freeloader and that's how she lives. And she's totally obsessed with herself. So I'm really loving her because everyone else hates her. And they shut up, you guys. Stop it. Sorry, I'm babysitting your dog, you guys. It's horrible in here. So everyone hates her. And it's going to be really fun to watch her get it throughout the season. And the rest of them are just nerds. Like, there's another guy who's covered with hair all over the place on his back and his arms. Oh, I hate that guy. And there's another guy who's had like a ton of plastic surgery and all this stuff, because he's gay and he wants to look good. And it's like, girl. And make them taller. I don't know. I'm just having a lot of fun watching it. I'm surprised that you guys aren't liking it. Well, my thing is this, I think that they're trying to force the idea that it's super sexy in Northern California, like, and that this is a sexy lifestyle with sexy young folks. And I'm like, nothing about this is sexy or appealing to me. Plus, on top of that, there's also a feeling of like, it doesn't feel timely. Like, it would have been one thing if this came out in 2000, 2001, when there was a lot of like intrigue about like, what goes on in Silicon Valley? Like, what's this new world that's developing? But now it's like, oh, the start to Silicon Valley, you know, Silicon Valley has been sort of established for like 11 or 12 years now. It's like, this is, we're not getting a peek into anything that interesting. Well, on the first point, the funny thing to me is that they think it's sexy, but they're total nerds. So that's what I think is funny about it. And to the second point, I think you're right. Like, on most of these shows, it's fun that you don't actually see them work, you know, like on the real house, so I don't want to watch them do their charities and shit all day. I want to watch them fight with each other. So right dinner, dinner, if it could be a dinner party, every episode I'm in. Yeah. Yeah. Which is basically what they're doing now, you know, so I don't know I'm liking it. I think that they're, you know, maybe if they were popular, they would get better people to be on it because the people now it's like, you've got an app to lose weight. Oh, that's so original. I don't have 20 of those on my phone already. You dip shit. But I didn't know that the world was that big. I thought it was like teenagers in their basement who were like, Oh, I'm going to make a calculator and learn Apple code. And then they upload it, and then they just luck into making millions of dollars. I didn't know that these kids were out there actually doing this for their life. I mean, Jesus. I don't think that any of them actually are all that rich, though. I feel like it's all fake. I mean, yes, reality TV is fake, but I feel like the girl in the four seasons, I mean, just I don't, I feel like she's an actress who makes like $5 an hour. Well, she is a big liar because she says that she's got so many Twitter followers, she's got 7,000 followers. I mean, come on now. That's not bad. How smart that? Wait, she has 7,000. I thought she had like 240,000. Well, that's what she said, but I heard someone told me the other day at a bar that she only had like 7,000. What's that girl's name? Wait, wait, why don't we get that case? If that's the case, Ben, you should be a millionaire. You know what? I saw someone the other day who had like 2,500 followers and had a verified account. I was like, what? What is a verified account? I mean, that's your famous. So I was like, you guys, our users should write letters to Twitter all day, trying to get us verified at what crappins. Yeah, how does that wait? Is that what happens to people right into Twitter? I don't know, but I think that our crazy listeners will probably do it. I believe that they will. Yeah, I have faith. Yeah, do that for us people. Okay, we need to move on to the housewives. Before that, though, I have to quickly say Shaz of sunset season two debuting December 2nd. I could not be more excited. Are you guys intrigued by season two? I am, especially by the new girl and her huge boobs. I mean, they look like that each one of them has a planetarium inside of them. No, that show makes me feel like an idiot, like as Anna would say from Real Housewives of Miami, I'm stupider for having watched this. Anna doesn't have that much of an accent, please. She's like a boring white lady. Listen, Matt, this is our podcast. We give everyone the most extreme accent as possible, you know. If you're going to, I mean, Ronnie, can I just, you know, this is, it's not even on, but can you just give me a Madison cackle, please? Okay, that's all I need. Moving on, moving on. Let's first start with the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, which aired its, was that second or third episode, third episode on Monday night. First dinner party. First dinner party of what is obviously going to be at least nine this season. I will start off by saying I was sad not to see Brandy at all in this episode. Oh, I know. That was, that was a shame. You know, she would have been crazy at that dinner party. She was, she had to go out of town to find somebody to sleep with because she already slept with everybody. There's like 16,000 people in Beverly Hills. Like when she slept, she said she slept with everyone in Beverly Hills. And so, you know, there's all those people and I'm very literal. So that means that she slept with over 10,000 people. I don't understand how that's possible. And I refuse to believe that she was just making a joke. So what do we do? Those of you who don't know what Penn and Ronnie are doing right there. They are mimicking a tailor who was a drunk bitch on this week's episode. And by the way, Taylor has no business being on this show. She has no fucking money. She has no clas, no the others don't have class either. But I just don't get why Taylor is there. She is done. Her storyline is done. Because she's a hilarious disaster. That's why she is a disaster. And if it weren't for her, this would have been a very ho-hum episode. But like, why did she? That is true. She showed up, first of all, she showed up at the dinner party already looking like a mess. Like whenever her forehead is visible, that means that she's wasted, you know? Whenever she gets out of a limousine, she is wasted. Yeah. And didn't even say thank you to the show for her, by the way. No. And she didn't even bring a gift. How dare she? I know. Well, she brought the gift of her drunkenness. So she looked like she had just come from Marshall's. Her forehead was out. Her hair was going in weird places. She barely had any makeup on. She was teetering like a newborn foal in some obscure high heels. Yeah. And then like by the time we get to the dinner party, the dinner party, she's drunk and she's bashing Brandy in a very tacky way. And then ultimately the night ends in some sort of sing along, although not really, it was more like a singing watch. But you know, I'd like David. So David Foster tells everyone, well, we've got some professional singers here, and the world's the greatest trumpet player. So we're going to let them do all the heavy lifting. And Taylor was like offended. Taylor was like, she wanted to sing Amazing Race or whatever. I love that when they started playing like that sad Irish funeral song, she like lost her mind. She was fidgeting in her chair. Her head was spinning around like Linda Blair. And she could not like sad songs make her want to hang herself or something like I didn't understand like calm down. It's a sad song. Yeah, like get over it. Like you should appreciate the fact that you're getting a private concert from one of the world's greatest music producers and one of the allegedly the world's greatest trumpet player. Well, I think she's also got, you know, she was also pissed because she's friends with his ex-wife and he didn't even recognize her, which I thought was hilarious. I thought that was great. That was the best part of the entire episode. It was like, oh, hi, who are you again? And she's like, um, I'm best friends with your ex-wife. I know that was great. You know, I had to say I was sort of bracing for David Foster to be a total asshole. And I thought he seemed actually charming and nice. I'm I'm a step. Ronnie, Ronnie, you better shut the fuck up. David Foster and Landa are the two best ones on the entire show. Oh my god. I know. I'm trying to wake me up because we're recording this in the morning. You're just trying. Ronnie, they are actually like classy, nice people. No, they're not. He's she's the fourth wife. This guy just fucks any young girl he wants to. And dumb. He has six years old, but she has six months. That kind of fucking disgusting. And what he said when he was like, oh, I can't believe how many women don't know how to be perfect home makers. Hey, fuck you, dude. Like, congratulations on being talented, but hey, shut up in there. Sorry, guys. David Foster. I'm jealous because David Foster doesn't have to deal with this shit. He does not have two dogs running around barking, interrupting his podcast. That's because they live in a 70,000 square foot home. And probably your Landa, like, has them, like, like afraid that they bark once they'll be put to sleep. She is just like just like her model daughter. If you walk the runway, I will put you to sleep. She is such a control freak and almost a sexy way. She's a control freak. She I mean, like her. Look, I have OCD. I have OCD. So I can like, I understand her and my refrigerator looks just like hers. Her refrigerator is crazy. First of all, you can't even reach the artichokes on the tippy top, which is hilarious. Second of all, those glass doors while pretty probably get so much energy. I mean, they probably spend so much money on wasted energy because that refrigerator, it drives me nuts. And to them, it means nothing. Nothing. Nothing. I am going to occupy their kitchen. Can we talk about her butler for a second? And why did it seem like such a scandal that she has the same butler as Camille Grammer? Did she steal the butler? Like, what has happened? I don't think Camille... He's a slutler. Well, she has... It's not only Camille's, it's also Muhammad. So this guy's just like, he's like the bravo butler slut. I don't know what the steal is. And he's, you know, he's not a very good butler because, you know, we all watch down now, we know what proper butler is about. And you know what, this guy, guess what I'll get? And he's like, oh yes, we met at Camille Grammer's. It's like, you know what, that's not your place to say any. Yeah, you're not socialized. You're not a butty. Open the fucking door. Yeah. And I love what he said. He said to Lisa Vanderpond. He's like, oh yes, I believe that we met at Camille Grammer. And she's like, oh yes, yes. She just walks away like, who the fuck was that? Yeah, she's like, wow. He has a butler slash caterer, slash caterer. He was an interesting little character there. But, you know, Yolanda, though, I will say this, she was actually quite composed in general for the entire gender party. I thought she was gonna bust out some crazy obnoxious behavior. And when she gave, she gave Taylor that ice cold bitch there when Taylor was wasted. And I thought it was marvelous. Oh, the best I didn't, she say like, there is nothing uglier than a drunk woman. I was like, that is that is closer legs to married men territory. It was, I mean, she's right, though. She's right. That's the thing. A drunk queen is way uglier. I was just gonna say a drunk queen at the Abbey. It's the worst thing possible. Especially if they're wearing an ascot. Oh, It's had too much brandy. I'm wasted. I can't believe they're playing Danny Boy. Why don't I got to listen to an iris dirge? Only the Russell was iris. She doesn't even know what the word dirge means. Oh, she has no clue. Do you guys though? I mean, she's bad, but I just feel like Adrienne is the most unbearable person on this show. Like, I feel like, I feel like she knows that she's in the dog house for treating Lisa like shit on the reunion from the previous season. But I just don't even see the possibility of her redeeming herself. I feel like she's just digging this whole deeper and deeper and more and more people are hating her. Yes, she is actually really been a bit obnoxious. I love how on the one hand she accuses Lisa of being petty. And then she and Paul complain that well, Lisa called up my dog crackpot and Lisa said mean things about my shoes. Well, you know what, you made accusations about her character. Yeah, that's not the level you dumbhole or like no, like the pencil in your hair is so tight that is causing you to be retarded. Well, what's going on with Paul? I mean, that guy used to be likable. And now he's despicable. Like, who talks to a woman like that? That's fucking disgusting. You go to a party and you start cursing as loud as you can about somebody. So if they can hear you on purpose, like, who does that? He's getting he's getting gross. I mean, I used to like defend him, especially when we heard all of the, you know, rumors about their divorce. I obviously took his side because Adrian is the monster in that couple. But then in the past two episodes, we've started to see that Paul is kind of a dirty, sleazy dick. Is it gorilla? And he not only does he look like one, but now he's actually like one. Yeah. I call him Flintstone. I think he's just a total Flintstone. He's just well, it's like, just get out your club and beat somebody over the head and drag him in the back. You don't like him. You know what, someone on either Twitter or Facebook and I'm sorry, which whoever said this, because I don't remember who it was, said, you know, it's funny that Adrian was preaching to, to, to Kim about how sometimes, you know, you just have to move on from a situation. That's all you got to do. You just got to move on. And it's like, you know what, Adrian, you are the one who wants to move on. Like, you can't be preaching that stuff while you're sitting here complaining and sending logs made of feces to restaurants. Roll up your eyes so everybody can see you, and cursing as loud as you can about somebody so that everybody can hear you. It's just gross. And you know, classless, darling. And you know, at Lisa made a very salient point, which was that if Adrian thinks that Lisa is this awful person who is beyond reproach, why is she so like interested in apologizing or having a sit down, you know? Exactly. With Credit Karma, finding the right credit card for you is easy. Our app analyzes user profiles to suggest personalized recommendations. Visit credit karma.com today to explore cards tailored to your needs. Credit Karma, simplifying your financial choices. Hey, prime members, have you heard? You can listen to your favorite podcast, ad-free. Good news. With Amazon Music, you have access to the largest catalog of ad-free top podcasts included with your prime membership. To start listening, download the Amazon Music app for free or go to amazon.com/adfreepodcast. That's amazon.com/adfreepodcast to catch up on the latest episodes without the ads. Well, they want to sit down because Adrian thinks that Lisa owes her an apology. The woman is delusional. And the thing is, people that rich, nobody really is ever honest with them. And so they don't know that they're fucking assholes. So when you get someone like Lisa, who doesn't care that they're rich, because Lisa's rich enough on her own and her businesses are actually not failing unlike the moulouse. So, you know, when you get someone like that, they're just so shocked that anyone has the nerve to not kiss their ass. I just love watching them score them. I love it. You make a good point. Adrian does not realize that she's a fucking bitch. Like she, I feel like that's just who she is. And she does not understand that that is not real life the way she acts. You know, I think we would all like Adrian, you know, we've always liked the ballbuster bitchy bitchiness of her. We always like that aspect of her. Oh, well, we don't like is the self serving victimizing or quality that she suddenly has. It's the preaching. It's really the preaching. Like every episode, we've we're only three episodes in this season. But I feel you just mentioned this, Ben, like every episode, she gets up on her high horse and she starts preaching all this bullshit to like another cast member. And it's like, at the end of the day, you are the biggest fucking hypocrite on this cast. Oh, yeah, for sure. I love when Kim's like, so Kim, how are you feeling? And she's like, Oh, yeah, it's been real hard because I want to drink sometimes like whenever the sun comes up. And so that's harder. Like when it's warm in my house or cold, you know, it's hard. And she's like, Oh, yeah, it's hard. Like, like, like, like dealing with Lisa. You know, when I want to drink, when I have to see Lisa, she's like, Oh, well, you know, my kids almost left me and never talk to me again. She's like, yeah, Lisa. Such a bad. She's such a bad friend. I mean, how fucking selfish is she Kim is like fresh out of rehab and still fucking high as a kite. And she after 10 seconds, she immediately turns it into her fight with Lisa. What a bitch. Yeah, she's pretty. She's pretty vile. Okay, but can we please talk about we need to talk about Kim, we need to talk about Kim making the chicken salad and then Bravo's camera's like focusing on her. Bisting a a salad on a shitty like nasty table in a dilapidated house. Well, she was mumbling while she was mumbling. Yeah, I got a lot of salad as cupcakes. She's like, I miss, I miss some budget in my childhood that now I'm going to make it. I'm going to do what I always wanted to do, which is go to a prom and make chicken salad at the same time. I'm lemonade. I mean, like, why, why have all, why did you want to make a chicken salad at that? And she looked like she was ready to serve like the gram, like the greater Los Angeles area, the fall is so huge. You know that her, you know that her daughter was like, we're not eating here. Don't why are you cooking? If she's just like, I'm making that like they're a spanta. And she just kept cooking and preparing stuff. It's, oh, I don't know that she was cooking. They just kept showing her sitting at a sad dining room table with a bottle of Hellman's mayonnaise. It was fucked up. She's making her mom's favorite. And then the great debate. I leave the the dish top on the cupcakes. Or do I take it off? Oh my god, the great debate. And then, and then like the daughter goes off and Kim's like staring to the through the vertical blinds crying and crying. I love her though. I can't deny the fact Kim is my favorite. I cannot believe that she subjects herself to the scrutiny and the embarrassment of what she goes through on this show. It's so awkward to watch, but she is my favorite. Yeah, she is really one of the best. She's just so sweet. But you know, part of me is like, of course, you know, the needy alcoholics like going to prepare a bunch of food that no one eats so that she can sit there alone with all her food being sad. It's like, come on, Kim. Go to a movie, girl. Come on, call it a girl. Call it a girl. Call it a kid. Call your old friend, Kim. Kim, it all is chicken salad. Nobody ate it. So I drank it. My drink is absolutely vital. Absolutely. Well, where's Maurice? Maurice likes chicken salad. Hey, where's my house? He's sold it. Oh, wait, I'm inside it. Never mind. Oh, nobody wants to steal that house. Let's get real. That's a cute house. I'll take it. Yeah. Maybe sitting someone's dog that wouldn't be fighting right on her lap. Let's talk about her sister for a second. Kyle, the little storyline, I guess there. I mean, the story obviously was Yolanda's dinner party, but Kyle was busy teaching her daughter how to drive and she was teaching her in a Porsche Panamera, which costs $110,000. Yeah. And also, by the way, she was also teaching her how to parallel park on a curved curve, which by the way, that's like some advanced shit right there. Yeah, I can't even do that. But I will say that when I learned to drive, it was an afford tourist station wagon, not a Porsche Panamera. And wait, can I tell you something also, when I was watching that scene, the Kyle's daughter said, I guess Kyle said, pull up alongside this car. And he goes like, Oh, I guess that's why they call it parallel parking because you're up alongside a car. And Kyle said, or it's mainly because you're parallel to the sidewalk. And I have to say, I had this reaction where I was like, Oh, I was like, it's so nice to so refreshing that Kyle knew the proper answer to that. And then I was like, my bar is that set so low that like, this very simple, like obvious thing to me, I'm like, Oh, I'm impressed that someone got that right. Like I was actually like, I actually was like, Oh, you know, Kyle, like she's sort of smart, isn't she? I think no, no, no, it's a very basic obvious thing. I'm just used to all these women being total idiots. I love that Ben noticed that at all. I didn't even hear it. I love that that's just the kind of thing you're looking at. You're like, now that's a classy woman. He knows true meaning. Only mine would be thinking like that. I was thinking, I hope somebody crashes into that car. That's only good thing. I take the tiniest details and I just read it. I put so much into smallest things at all times. I have one more thing to say about Camna before we leave her forever. Someone just posted on my Facebook. Gifford just posted on my Facebook. Hey, did you notice that Kim's doorbell was the national anthem? She said she's very patriotic. I thought the doorbell was broken. No, that's hilarious. I did not notice that. That's hysterical. I did not. That's so funny. Who noticed that? That's hilarious talking about noticing little things. Yeah, but Kyle, here's the thing that always strikes me about Kyle. I remember when when the show first started and I thought that woman is just stunningly beautiful. First of all, like the hair and she's just so pretty and her husband was so cute and her kids are so sweet and you know over time I just I don't get it. Like she's not funny. She's not witty. She doesn't ever have anything going on. She has nothing to talk about. I mean unless she's fighting with her sister you know being bitchy with someone else she's really got zero going on and it's kind of painful to watch her. I mean okay we're watching you give a terrible driving lesson to your daughter. Great. Now let's watch you try and get everyone else's bullshit. I don't know. She needs to go. I don't like her. There is a problem because she more than anybody tries to play both sides of the fence. I think that she wants to paint herself as like this middleman who really wants you know everybody to mend fences. But that's not going to fly with Lisa Vanderpump. I mean you need to. This is the housewives. You have to pick a side and then the battle must rage on. Yeah well I totally you know agree with what Lisa says and I love watching how Lisa is dealing with all of this. Just like why would I talk to her? Like yeah you know she wants to apologize. That's wonderful. If not I don't care. Period. The end. I just I can't I can't wait for Yolanda to get into her first feud with someone because I think that will be a magnificent because right now all she is talking about is how romantic she is and how romantic her house is and how I could have been Martha Stewart daughter. No I'm I wanted to be fighting with a bitch and she's gonna get she's gonna get evil and I'm gonna love it. I want her and Brandy to team up and take out Taylor. Like and by takeout I don't mean just like be mean to I mean fucking kill her. Because Brandy will murder people. There's no doubt about it. I wonder if Taylor ate anything at the dinner party or maybe she she's probably had a diet to lose those 10 pounds that are really making her look massive. Do you notice that the only thing that she wanted to eat was that former American Idol contestant. She was like what I took up that shit up. Yeah they need to stop putting American Idol contestants in front of Taylor. It's just. Especially the ones that all look like Ace Young. Exactly. She'll have us. Patchems. Tragly hair and all like 29 years old and she wants to bang all of them. Yeah watching your dog hump the carpet. It's just natural but it's disgusting. More like rub their ass and just you know skid across the floor. All right well anyway does anything else give anything else to say about Beverly Hills. I don't want to Atlanta. No Beverly Hills needs to have the drama. That's it. I know this week's episode. I thought this was the best one so far. I mean I'll be honest with you. It puts Atlanta to shame you guys. I think it Atlanta is so fucking and I hate that the new cast members discuss. I love Atlanta and I love the new cast members. The new girl is cracking me up. Uh Portia. Finally. Have you known it like. I have a I have a charity that my grandpa started and it's really important that you guys come to my charity because it's all powerful women. I love her. Here's a bold thing. Are you married yet? Are you married yet? You're not married yet? Oh that's how it's very good. Are you married? What do you all read? Don't worry. I knew once knew an old lady and she went to a doctor and they made her pregnant. So just look it up on the internet. It was like a Chinese doctor. I'm gonna have like five years and then I'm not gonna have any more kids and then I'm gonna have a party in the back and a tent and it's gonna be a little cold but I want you to come. Oh gosh girl. I don't even want to think about having children when I'm past 35. Oh my god. I'm gonna hear myself. Why not 10 36? She is she is the love child of Phaedra Parks and I actually think that she is the Alexis Bolino of Atlanta. Yeah and that's what I like about her is that because everyone on the cast is dumb but she's like a different style of dumb. She's like a ditzy dumb as opposed to a um self-important thinks they're smart dumb. She's just a full-on idiot dumb. Yeah she's like an idiot. She's an airhead. I love her. I think she's gonna be so great and I think that Kenya was so mean to her. Why was she so mean to that poor girl? Well she's an easy target. She's an easy target and Kenya is a bully and when you see that it's like putting a stake in front of a rabid German Shepherd. If you called Michelle Obama the first lady of Zimbabwe who would run out of your little LL Bean tent that you put in the backyard and put three people in okay and at one time every Queen of America said you ma'am are no Michelle Obama. I know Michelle Obama. Michelle Obama is a friend of mine. Okay we we're all gay obviously um do you guys know do you guys know the difference between Miss Universe Miss USA and Miss America? I have no fucking idea what any the difference between any of them are. Okay Miss America is like the top and it's the best it's like the traditional one it's the old-fashioned one Miss USA started by Donald it was owned by Donald Trump so there that's the difference. So so she's like the fake shitty one of all of those pageants. Yeah so basically she's had Donald Trump stick in her mouth. This is what you're saying because that's totally rigged you know that right. Oh man that just got a little dark. Really? What's so dark about that? That's what Donald Trump said. Oh man. Um I felt slightly bad when can you win into her whole. My mother left me when I was little and I've seen her dozens of times and she won't even acknowledge my existence and you know I kind of felt for her and then I realized I wouldn't acknowledge your existence either. You're terrible. You are fucking horrible. Were you like that as a child too? Well and then didn't you guys notice did she say that her mom has mental illness and I'm like well clearly it runs in the family. No kidding. Um I mean I feel bad for her because that's a fucked up childhood. Obviously her mom is a total asshole but at the same time I'm like I don't know that you should be on reality TV I think you should be in a padded cell. Yeah she is she is really crazy and she I mean you guys can tell like there is a severe like lock her up meltdown in in the very near future. Oh absolutely. Dead air. Dead air. The thought of it has just. I know we all were taking a second to imagine you know the cops dragging her away from a dinner party probably in episode 10. Uh she's going to be going down. I mean she's going to be taking people down. Well where do you guys see like where do you see the new cast members like aligning themselves. She had a bizarre lunch with Phaedra where they were cheersing with like they were eating like gelato with chopsticks. It was some like tacky theme restaurant in Atlanta which they always go to. I feel like Portia is going to align herself with maybe a toaster oven and I think that Kenya is going to align herself with maybe Phaedra. Um yeah I don't know but I don't really watch this one for the drama so I don't care about that. I watch it just because every scene makes me laugh. I mean at Portia honestly like every scene made me laugh with her and I love that like her husband Cordell's do it came into this woman's charity function to present his wife with a chadelle back like and she's like oh thanks honey. So offensive. She's like thanks look at my husband. Now let's find some money for the children. Thanks for coming. My wife is so gorgeous. Yeah here's a present baby. Here's a check baby. Like come on now old man. Yes I'm all set up sit down on my lap baby. Let me tell you a story. He's like you know what's the best thing to do with a charity event is to give personal money to the one running it and to put everyone else when you're trying to ask everyone else to give their money to the charity. That's a really good thing to do. Because all those other people there were poor. Let's be real. I love that these people you know we saw this the other week on the show whenever there's like an event it's always like the high class ladies of Atlanta that are smart powerful business women and then you cut to the crowd and it's like who are these dumpy bitches? Yeah and I love that she changed it. She's like these are the most powerful women in Atlanta. And then when she gets there she's like you got the power for your powerful mothers your powerful wives. It's like no honey that's not the same thing okay I mean if that's it's if that's the powerful crowd in Atlanta I do not Nini for going I'm gonna pack my fucking bags and go to LA fuck this shit. Well what's what's funny is that yeah I thought we saw the powerful women last week at that party which by the way Nini this week she referred to it as her success party. I thought it was a celebrating powerful women in Atlanta but she's like oh Kim Kim walked out of my success party. It's like I wouldn't you if you called it that. Well it was supposed to be a party for her and she's like I don't want it to be about me I want it to be about everybody and Cynthia's like oh we'll make it about powerful women then so she's like changes it in her mind every Tuesday. Nini's so crazy but I like that she's actually being nice and it's very funny watching Nini talk to pedestrians like they're fucking retarded. Oh you guys she's freaking metal. I'll get you you all so nice can you hear me can you hear me. And then she's talking to like those little acting students she's like oh well that's great well you you keep going at it you keep doing it as if like she is some like established actress. Right like she's fucking Meryl fucking streep are you kidding me. I know. I mean Ryan Murphy is a homo that likes the Real Housewives of Atlanta and he's put her on two of his fucking shows like that is why this is happening. There's no other reason it's not like she's that talented. No I haven't watched her sitcom or I haven't seen her uncle so I'm a bad gay. I mean she's fine she's fine but it's not like I mean she thinks I I don't know I think for her going to the gay pride parade and having people fawn like lesbians fawn all over her skewed her like situation like guess what you are not Viola Davis. By the way did you did you notice that that Greg is all of a sudden like 10 times more animated than he ever was like he clearly is a trying to get in with her new new normal money but also clearly trying to get like be like cool on screen now like Greg it's embarrassing it's very embarrassing. That was my favorite scene of the night. Baby I need the key to your house and your heart I need the key to your heart baby. He talks like a preacher I just it's so weird to me I feel every time he opens his mouth it's like take me to church Greg even though you're not talking about church shit. Everyone talks like a preacher on the show I mean like figures like Phaedra that's true. I'm gonna talk about some donkey booty and then it's like you could just interchange donkey booty with Jesus Christ. Exactly exactly we need to get a good shape on that which could be the same as like we need to give it up for the Lord. Oh my god so true. Oh by the way speaking of Phaedra for a second um how did Apollo go online click a button and now he's a certified personal trainer. Really how does that happen? I'm I I ask no questions I will just gladly give myself up to Apollo and have him train me. I would have no problem with that. Oh you'd like him to train you? Mm hmm. Anger. That's never off like Lawrence. Don't get booty. Lawrence who showed up at that event wearing um like a moo moo of some sort. I mean well with a belted with a Louis Vuitton but I mean I'm sorry but like this is just sad. I can't deal with Lawrence. I mean I know I'm all everyone's allowed to have their self expression and their gender expression but um it's ridiculous. No we're still allowed to judge it. I have a problem with it. It freaks me the fuck out with it. Just not just Lawrence not everybody else just Lawrence. Yeah it's just it's too much. Well I would just buy more flattering clothes. Like he's wearing precious' dress. Like what is that dress? That's not even close to being class. It's not doing anything for this big exact. And it wears this like red shiny lipstick at all times and it just like I hate that. It's like I feel like it's gonna get smeared off of everything. Yeah and I don't like his leggings. The leggings are not good. Yeah so uh Lawrence um we uh we need you to to change your look up a little bit. Yeah let's come on. Make an effort. Come on now. He's gonna be so angry. He's gonna be an angry queen right now. You guys guess who I'm starting to hate and I can't believe I'm gonna say this. Kim. Kim Zolciak my former lover. I cannot I cannot stand her. She is awful. How many times do we have to listen to her talk about how she's getting evicted. I mean and and why and why if she's leasing a house oh wait she thought she was gonna buy a house. Never mind. I'd say why'd you put $10,000 of landscaping in but she was. I'm sorry but sweetie should murder her on her sleep. She's a total trash. I'm listening to her talking about getting on her husband's dick all the time. It's like shut up Jesus like you're you're trying as hard as you can to be as tacky as you can to stop it and she's you know like she's on her own so she refuses to go anywhere. If anybody else is like bitch this is not your so okay right this is a new season of Real Housewives of Atlanta. This is not season two of kroy and kim universe and guess what I really do think that those rumors of her acting up with bravo and the producers and then kind of just like being removed from the show or kind of walking away. I totally see this happening. I think that Kim is not gonna make it through this season and I think that bravo is done with her. Oh no I told you last week she gets fired. She's not making it through the season. That's why she's all the way on the end this year. They're just gonna lop her off of the of the titles. Again the idea of Kim it's just it's just played out her shtick is played out there's like nothing left. When she was fun she used to be kind of fun and now it's just like oh everything's just so she's so above everything and she's not above anything like she's just some piece of white trash hoe who's living once you hide in the hog and she's gonna be a broke bitch in a couple of years and all she does is stand in that kitchen and say that she's homeless eating chick fucking fillet every episode she's eating chick fillet but like you said her her storyline is played out but I think that the serious issue is Kim is fun when she's drunk and clearly she doesn't drink when she's pregnant and she's pregnant too much these days so unless she has a gallon of chardonnay running through her system I don't want to hear her talk she also does not honestly have a fascinating personality there's nothing about her that's inherently interesting I mean looking so are you saying that when she was fun was she fun only when she was tag teaming with Nini yeah and when she was in some sort of feud but you know if you look at candy for instance candy is not doing really anything she's packing up boxes you know but like she comes on screen and she's always sort of like entertaining to watch because she is a interesting human being and she says funny things and she has a hilly cast are hilly hilly family members that are hilarious yeah exactly but like Kim when she's left to her own devices she just sort of sits there and says sort of sarcastic dumb things that aren't really that funny and the her idiocy isn't even that the novelty of it is sort of gone away you know it's no one by back of the day it was so hilarious to watch her holding a glass of chardonnay and smoking cigarette in her car you know but now she doesn't even do stuff as dumb as that anymore she just is spoiled so the point is the three of us only like women who smoke and drink and act queerly yes and poor yes and poor and poor chef my new sweet baby doll Portia somebody is going to eat that bitch alive like she like Kenya I think is going to maybe strangle her on the on the season I don't know I just don't like there will be a Portia needy clash at some point and that will be epic I'm I'm up for that I'm up for that all I want needy to do though is she needs to dump Cynthia Cynthia is so lame I cannot do she is the most boring housewife ever well it's hard to have time for personality when you're busy running the Bailey Agency oh stop Ronnie are you there still okay Ronnie did we put you to sleep because Atlanta is that boring wait can we move on to Miami are we done with Atlanta Atlanta yeah let me laugh but I really just don't have a whole lot to say about it yeah I really love watching it but you know other than Phaedrus I'm gonna make a donkey booty video maybe I really don't have much to talk about it's more than I go then let's head to Miami and talk about mama Elsa oh that is too mentally I leave the house with a table full of french fries I didn't want oh my god he's a very stupid man what maybe okay he's a very stupid man very stupid okay this is a shame that we're shoving Miami at the end of this episode because holy shit so true this was the best housewives episode about all three why don't we should have started with this one quite frankly this was an amazing episode it had two separate fights um crazy accents crazy old people it was everything you could want in an episode um that guy Thomas what or is it Thomas or Thomas Thomas Thomas sit down or shut up at all oh my god that's perfect that's really good I love that he's sitting next to a bell that he can ring at people ding ding ding hey you'll be quiet I don't like you talking I cook all day nobody help me and now you want to act like this no who am I to you and then it wasn't a little it wasn't a little bell either it was a fucking big ass bell and then dr karen sierra of course like kissing asses like she's like Joanna you hear this this is so funny that you hear this and then her mama is terrifying terrifying and I love that karen brought her mom who by the way looked quite good in her little so belted outfit her mom tells tk who shows like this fake dildo thing and the mom's like oh you are incredible i do not hate him you're incapable so funny karen karen reminds me of i don't know if you see that saturday at live sketch but it's like they're like creepy puppet guys on like a roller coaster ride that murder people yeah and they're like robotic and they have like crazy grins and their eyes don't really blink and they kind of look like skeleton i mean she is so scary to me i don't i feel like she truly is robotic i also don't feel like she's an actual dentist with that fake smile i feel like she actually works at alamo rent a car i feel like she gets people she gives them cars she's a great hostess larda you know she she there's something better and and i did find it funny when tk shoved raw me into her mouth i was like i can't believe this guy is shoving like like raw me a good girl and eat and swallow it like i tell you uh that guy's so disgusting so hairy so scary and you know what i have to give major props to anna for sticking up and you know and and walking out of there and calling him from a misogynist she called him a misogynist which he is yeah you know it's it's one thing says we'll be making like body jokes it's the you know you got to know your room and you know if it had just been like lisa or someone you know like and they were making body jokes that's fine but clearly it's that's not the room and as a host you're supposed to make your guests feel comfortable it's not the guest's job to defer to the hosts and and oh and he i mean i hate joanna more than anybody but the fact that he was also joking about like is her boyfriend cheating on him look he's not friends with joanna to make those kind of jokes and yeah you know the first time i actually got pissed off at lia how dare i yeah but lia is friends with too many fucked up people i love lia but the fact that she would sit there and allow him to act that way was kind of disgusting and i also can't stay on her drag queen friend either she needs to dump both of these guys before we get into that let's keep talking about this let's keep talking about this let's see let's finish with this dinner party okay so i'm glad that anna pieced out like i really i really started to like anna this episode yeah and and started and she totally startled the the poor pa on the production you see him there i'm surprised they didn't blur him out he saw i'm like jumping around in the foyer he was like well i'm like i'm right but um but then joanna joanna totally the sort of girl who sees one girl crying and then she has to cry too you know because she's obviously she's like i just don't feel comfortable in this house anymore i like i don't i don't want to be here i don't want to be in this house i don't like the energy here anymore you know yeah well then she should have left but then lisa coaxed her back in lisa by the way is so irrelevant and is not necessary to be on the show well you know the other thing is uh roman shouldn't have left the dinner party why why he had a meeting that's bullshit you're you're you have a dinner party you go the dinner party you don't leave for a meeting uh man he had to go fuck Marta are you kidding me he was exactly he was you know that's what's so funny about tom is it's not that he's wrong it's just he's just so gross about it yeah exactly good point very good point he is i mean i don't know i i do think anna was right that people kiss his ass because he's rich because he he is i can see that he's probably maybe like to his inner circle he's a nice guy but you know what though the way he talked about also so the way he talked to lisa who's known for 20 years i mean that's just that was ridiculous yeah i i i think the fact that anna i mean she might have really this is sad but he might be like a major player in the miami social scene and she truly could have just fucked herself out of like a lot of parties and events going forward but i like that she actually said that and i like that they aired it she was just like people are kissing his ass because he's rich and that is fucked up and i just i don't know i really i'm so pro Anna i'm sure next week i want to stab her but right now i'm like riding high she she i i agree i think she is one of the few housewives that have actually really stood up for herself in a mature way and really um didn't count so it's a wealth and i thought that was i was totally um cheering her on yeah me too i like anna i've always liked anna you know who i don't like karen you know first i thought everybody's such a bully they need to leave this girl alone and now i want her to just get electrocuted she's horrible is she sleeping with him do you think she's sleeping with him because i thought he was gay oh well well i thought he was gay too but now i'm not thinking that he is that he might just be european but i know that karen's mom would love that okay well when else i was saying oh this is the woman who kicked in my face i think that she and she was accusing her of doing thomas and lee is like what they're just friends that's ridiculous that's crazy um yeah first i thought yeah that's crazy and then i thought no and karen she probably has sat on his lap a few times she's probably sat on that apron penis a few times oh gross you know i was a little surprised that i had to say um roy black was sitting there at that table and i for some reason i sort of i i envision him being a voice of reason given that he's a lawyer and he's a very respected and famous lawyer and i sort of thought when things are crazy he might try to step in and clarify in in like insane words where people might have been miscommunicating and he just sort of sat there and laughs that's why i was pissed i wanted the two of them to get up and leave i mean clearly they're my favorites but i was just like why would they stand for this bullshit well lee was getting defensive about uh thomas but lee was also coming down in marisole too well marisole is so pointless i mean again like never gonna apologize for anything which is fine and i really don't think that she needs to apologize for anything but why don't they just get rid of her and replace her with mama elsa that is where the action is at mama elsa will never go on without marisole uh uh marisole i would never do this without you she had like she had like 20 amazing quotes my favorite might have been the french fries yeah i leave a table with a french fries i do want that out of my house you're not very far from karen's mother i know right karen's mother is more like hey hey hey hey hey hey and thomas is like i hate him i will give you get out of my house let's talk about boobs you do not talk about these things at my party have fun i don't want to hear all about these high school things i'm just back and forth i think you think i knew i don't want to know i just want to say he think i know he is don't talk what does this what is his ethnicity i was going to say he is very hittler s how could you not know this get out i closed all this food nobody helped me i cook on the ground shut up and get out he didn't cook anything he shot long meat people's mouths i woke up my favorite penis aprons yeah my god well i'm glad you've been perfecting that and not your candy barris so oh my god first i was i actually was working on it this week i was like she was talking and i actually tried to like mimic i like i couldn't do it i was like i would hear her voice really hard because you've talked about it so now i watch it i try it you know just to see if i can do just to see if i can beat you and i can't do it it's really hard and my dog was looking at me like i was crazy it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like she's got shiny that curmit thing yeah she has to get back and she goes oh she just goes deep in high at the same time so she'll be like well i don't know about this my i don't know all right they just sound weird when you try to do it i don't know about packing up this frame oh what was up with that guy what was it her uncle he's like hey yeah i'm packing this up oh this reminds me of a time i used to do i don't want something i know there was no like we don't have segues on our show but there was no segway there it went right to sex toys yeah it's like well if you have a sex show everybody's going to come talk to you about dildo so about the long you know about the hump strap around the refrigerator yeah wait so all right so back to miami so that dinner party was crazy um i'm glad for the people who left um i won't want it Alexia to be there i'm not going to lie uh yeah that was she's she has come unhinged she has she's like you know she's just like a this blonde bombshell craziness in the best way she would have gone that's on current the whole time we've been fantastic well i love that parent can't even get anything right you know everyone hates her so she tries to have some dinner which would she even really having a dinner party she didn't do anything but show up like somebody else had it at their house they cooked i don't even know why it was hers at all but whatever she tries to have a dinner party and she keeps saying how like she's like you know she's like Thomas is my friend and this really bothers me i'm like you know Thomas knows everyone else this entire dinner party like 10 years on you so stop acting like he's your proprietary friend and that like you're embarrassed that how these people are acting like he knows who these people are like you don't have to be embarrassed yeah she should just be embarrassed for herself not for Thomas or for those other people she is just awful she she really is um so now let's talk about the other big uh to do of the episode which had to do with um it was like it was like tranny fight 2012 it was Elaine versus Marisol versus Lauren Foster who is the new tranny on the scene and is hilarious oh Lauren Foster needs to be added to the cast stat i mean this cast already has 400 cast members she needs to be in the mix she needs to be she when when she first walked about i was like are you serious is there another drag queen like socialite but i was like but she she was excellent she was she is Brigitte Nielsen meets tilde swinton with maybe a penis that got cut off and i love her fake British accent i love she's like i can't be part of this it's just so unlady like right and when she said that i'm thinking to myself like wait that's she's a lady i don't know how to choose a lady best part is she walks away she's like okay it's something they do like she walks away and then 10 seconds later she walks back she she clearly is very much part of it oh yeah wherever that camera is there are some really good quotes from her on our facebook page from the cold yes and i've had hot dinners and i won't be bullied by the housewife with a wiener so i love that like funniest shit ever so i love that this this crazy Elaine slash james is as furious at marisol that marisol would embarrass him uh but like then he's gonna go have a confrontation where all he's gonna do is embarrass himself i mean like exactly but why are they making this a storyline it is so frustrating to me because i don't give a shit about a sad drag queen i i find it really funny particularly when he's accusing marisol of like sabotaging him and he he literally says a quote he goes you did it with my job at the hard rock like like marisol like like we were supposed to believe that marisol cares about any drag queen that's before me at the hard rock thank you yeah and he was like that is so unprofessional you're at your job right now and what are you doing you're chasing down a guest at the party that you're hired to you know and see and be ready and publicly how is that professional you fucking and saying i'm not attacking i'm not attacking you and then he goes into attack mode yeah don't run away from me don't run away from me uh ever like everyone else in the world running away okay you cannot dress like a fucking monster from under the bed and i expect people to run away from you crazy i love i love a good fight like i'm a fighter but i would run away from him too i wouldn't too yeah honestly i'm not going to fight a mac truck you move out the street when they're driving down and honestly it's actually really it's with me it's also really fun why is lea friends with him well she likes all sorts of interesting people i've collected him collecting actually doesn't matter because she's going to invoice him later anyway freedom just loves him uh yeah he's a horrible horrible man i'm i'm embarrassed for all drag queens can we talk for a second about um lea having wine with uh mama elsa oh that was wonderful great with that scene was my probably my favorite scene of the entire episode yeah where she was explaining um he's actually these two people and mama elsa could not wrap her demented brainer up or her like fucked up plastic surgery brain around it can what was the quote it was amazing she said that destroys me mentally that was genius it was genius everything was genius everything honestly just the fact that there was a scene with lea and elsa just sitting together that that to me is all i need you know well and then how funny was it that lea was clearly trying to get shard and a running through her veins because as soon as she gets the more drunk she gets the more shit she starts talking yeah that's right she's like no more you're trying to get me to talk and then she's like and then they cut to her taking a swig yeah see well can we also talk about um the yacht that that adriana is moving on to and they showed um they're like oh i'm gonna show you alex's room and they go down to like the whole you know like they're they're putting poor alex in steerage i don't know if you notice that his bedroom is at the bottom of the yacht yeah no kidding that's where they kept that's where they kept the slaves it's like jesus really you're gonna put him there he's supposed to do his homework he's gonna be swaying like he's gonna be barfing on almost homework every single night the poor kid i don't i don't think this is gonna work out i feel like they're gonna keep renovating this boat and i think adriana is gonna be like oh yeah peace out i think she's actually living on a boat i read somewhere at the beginning of this moment she's living on a boat no i'm on a boat oh man google that shit uh yes she is uh that's i don't think it's i don't think this is a smart endeavor for her i love the relationship with her and her boyfriend i think it's so funny she's such a bitch and he's he just deals with it so well i think yeah when she was like oh this is he's a nice guy i like to live up to my uh you need to i don't know how you're going to live up to my standards and he's a standard standard all the sudden she's mexican well she has like these weird um i don't know about that but that's the mexican accent right there yeah but doesn't she brazilian slash yeah but she has a really she has a really relaxing is really strange but um i love that she's like i don't know how you're going to live up to my standards and he's like and her oh i see an entire lot is horrible it is the end of the world i darling she she oh every time her mouth opens it's almost as dramatic as martin loren's blood yeah we got to work on our on our adriana accent because it's really it's very bizarre and i love when she switches into french for something that's the coolest thing when she tells her like what she tells him like say don't say themage or whatever i'm like yay say don't march i love it i don't know i like hearing her other i like you listen to all her languages including independence that is her language you know she's like that makes me live languages but my main language is independent well my main language is independence and how dare you know me i can't do her accent right i can do her accent i hope that you live up to my standards what do you guys what do you guys think about um marta moving back in with romaine lettuce and joanna is she just back to have easier access to romaine's cock or what's the deal there i think romaine said it best when he said you're like the balls between my legs you like the balls but you my legs i miss fighting too i miss fighting with you i miss fighting with you are you going to is that's that's code that's code for sleeping with the current it's really hard guys it's really hard living at least this place there's like there's like um like so many bedrooms and like i couldn't focus on my music it was so much walking you guys i couldn't make music because i was walking from the kitchen to the bathroom for like two days you guys i don't know last i'm like i think you know what to do and i was like no one was buying regress was i kept on asking you guys for groceries but i don't know what to do oh my god um those were not crazy so are they just trying to get rid of miami because they're showing episodes at weird times it's like oh i think they're trying to promote it i think they're trying to promote it they're trying to like get it some extra love off of the other shows i think that's why i'd had a sunday episode to follow at lanta which has good ratings but miami's doing well and i'm going to be honest like it's my it's right up there with Beverly Hills right now for me i think i even prefer my Beverly Hills if i had to pick this week miami is the winner yeah i think this season two of miami is oh fuego i am i dig this entire cast i actually love that they have this huge extended cast it's like whole circle of characters because i think they're all amusing and horrible or hilarious they just they they all add something which i love you know Beverly Hills has a big cast too yeah i'm i'm loving all the housewives right now i think that they're all really fun um especially lanta though loving the bees a t l sucks i love it um and i think that that brings us to the end of our day everybody it certainly does well everyone that was a long episode that was but it was good well you know it's like thanksgiving we're full of we're full of bravo okay well what oh before we sign off what are what are each of you thankful for before we leave um i'm thankful for the real housewives of miami um i'm thankful that hostess twinkies shut down because i'm loving watching fat people freak out all over the place yeah it's nice because i'm on a diet so it's nice to not be the only miserable fat person in the world right now thank you hostess bye oh my god on that note uh don't forget to what are you thankful for what the hell yeah what's the hell um i i you better live up to our standards yeah you better live up to my standards my standard oh my god i'm i'm just thankful for archery i'm mad tear down get out i'm thankful for the for the latest episode of the real housewives of miami i think it was my favorite one ever and i'm so fucking addicted to that shit i don't not want to hear this anymore get out okay they have to bring him back he needs to be on the reunion it's official oh he'll be back i'll be back okay guys well we are wrapping up but don't forget to go to iTunes download us leave us an amazing comment and five stars anything less than five stars and we will cut ourselves uh follow us on twitter at what crappins follow me matt woodfield at life on the m-list ben at b-side blog and ronnie at tv gasm and uh leave us some more comments on our facebook page we always love to interact with you guys everybody have a safe and happy thanksgiving and we will be back next week to talk all about the housewives and all the other shit on bravo thank you thank you thank you and anything else that's it right that's it love you guys thanks happy thanksgiving bye [Music] if you like listening to comedy try watching it on 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