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Give it a try at mintmobile.com/switch. $45 up from payment equivalent to $15 per month. New customers on first three month plan only. Taxes and fees extra. Speeds lower above 40 gigabytes detail. Ladies and gentlemen, this is the count of speaking. We have arrived. Hey everybody, welcome to Watch What Crapins, a podcast dedicated to all things bravo. My name is Matt Whitfield from Yahoo TV, and joining me today are my trusty sidekicks who are always ready to dish all the dirt. Say hello boys. Hi. Hi everybody. For those of you who don't know, that is Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam. Today, we are going to be talking about the real housewives of Orange County. We had an explosive season finale along with the real housewives of New York City and the real housewives of New Jersey. For all of you fans out there and listeners, we have so much to talk about housewives related this week. If we don't get to anything that you want us to discuss, please feel free to tweet us at watch. What is it? I fucked up. It's what crap is. Can you like, can you edit that? It's okay. You're allowed to get it crazy. You have to edit that. Now I feel like it's the work. No, no, you're not a dork. It's okay. You're allowed to have a little stumble on a podcast. Jack wouldn't be so like ashamed of me. Well, it would be so drunk right now that you did say Jack. Well, let's start off with some gossip before we go into the OC finale because I know we have a lot to discuss. I have a huge amount of gossip, okay? And they all all my gossip comes from people who work on production that does not come from the internet, okay? Wait, so this is insidery. This is insidery. Okay, the first piece of gossip, it has nothing to do with the housewives. It's just a small item, which is that around the world in 80 plates is supposed to be coming back for a second season. So there's that. Um, pause. That is a big piece of shit. And nobody is watching it. The ratings are in the toilet. And the show kind of just, I'm sorry, catcore is not a TV star. Well, I think they're gonna tweak it. I think they're gonna tweak it. And they should because it's just it's it's not working. And I love travel. You know what they need to do to tweak any show on Bravo? And I knew you're gonna agree with me. More Gale Simmons. Oh, yeah. Do we know if Top Chef Just Desserts is coming back? Yeah, it's supposed to come back in the fall, probably. I mean, it never got canceled in the ratings. The ratings were fine last season. Thank God. I was a little scared. I was actually thinking about that last night. I was like, you know what? If Top Chef Just Desserts doesn't come back, I might cry. Seriously. That'll be back. Yeah, that'll be back. I wonder when Real Housewives of Miami is coming back because I see those bitches tweeting all over the place. I'm sure that's gonna be on soon. You know, they keep tweeting. And then it's like the show has been off the air for well over a year. I don't really think it's gonna happen. I just don't. Oh, they're taping it. No, I know taping, but I don't know that the tape is ever gonna see the light of day. Well, I think it is because they've published a well, they've published a lot of stories. I mean, there's been a lot of gossip stories about how trashy it is this year. So sounds like I'm open for it. I enjoyed that horrific reunion that they had. And you know, I don't know. Did you guys watch the Bravo's Top 20 reunion special moments? It was fabulous. It was. But I have to talk about one thing real quickly. And I'm getting into this reunion thing because I just mentioned the Miami thing. Andy Cohen put in a clip around 15 or 14 of he it was like a clip from the first season of New Jersey reunion where he was like, what a crazy moment when I outed myself on TV. Like, first of all, everyone knew you were gay. Second of all, this clip is so unremarkable. And third of all, this is just basically like feeding your ego right now that you think that everyone who saw that reunion was like, oh my God, remember that mama when Andy Cohen admitted that he was gay? No one cares. That guy came out of the womb sucking his own dick. Oh, hey, if you guys keep talking more shit about Andy Cohen on this podcast, how am I ever going to win that thing to get behind the bar on Watch What Happens? Because I applied. Let me tell you you'll get in. But let me tell you something. Andy Cohen, the placenta look like a rainbow. Okay, he's been super cool. Okay, no offense to Andy Cohen, but like that moment did not deserve the two of you applied to get behind the bar on his show. You just got eliminated. I'm sorry. Oh, he's got a good sense of humor, though. He's funny. I'm sure he's chuckling along. We're just saying that he's gay. Big deal. We're saying that he's super gay and that everyone knew. Okay, that's all we're saying. Okay, so do you want to hear some more gossip? Yes, clearly him. Saturday. Okay, now this is all my gossip has to do with the real housewives of Orange County, which is convenient because that's the next thing we're going to talk about. Yay. First thing. Oh, actually, this is one item that did not come from production. This is an item that was like, by the way, you sound like Kathy Griffin when you go on your tangents and like, where the hell are we going with this? Real it in. Real it in. I don't know. I thought there was a rule and improv that you don't be nasty to people. Okay. Really? No, we've never to improv, but that's the truth. Here's an item that we never talked about, but I think we should have, which is that Alexis had to go to the hospital recently to get stitches. Did you guys hear about this? Because she sat on a wine glass. Who? Alexis Bellino sat on a wine glass and had to get stitches. Oh, well, you know that she never goes to get surgery for the real thing. So she's probably got butt rejuvenation or something for dinner. Yeah, exactly. Who's this? Who's this on a wine glass, though? I mean, I guess she does. I mean, look, everybody has their fetish. I don't judge. You probably have a water closet. Yeah. Wine glasses that I sit on. Okay. So now here's what I learned from production. Everyone on the production of Real House of Orange County apparently referred to Jim Bellino as the chin, which I, which I appreciate. I like that everyone calls on that. Okay. The other thing I learned is that Gretchen's late are apparently a lot more rocky than what you're seeing on TV and that their relationship is actually not in a good place. Well, don't you think that has something to do with the fact that Bravo is clearly pushing her to dump his ass? Probably. I mean, at the end of the day, she's going to pick the show and fame and Gretchen Christine Butte overslayed. I mean, that's just the way it is. Well, and then the other thing is that I mean, she does want to get married, but she's not going to take on his debt. So that's probably like a true stress. I really would like to see that play out in the next season because, look, she, you know, she's a moron. Don't get me wrong. But I do think it would be fun to see her date somebody her own age, not, you know, a dying grandpa or dirty slayed. Yes, that's true. Although, you know, now that he's a radio DJ, that kind of makes him sexy, right? He's on 92, three events, a remote video DJ. No, that's, that's all male wigs fucking. That's terrible. Yeah. And let's talk about a medium that's doing really, really well right now. Guys, he's on a terrestrial radio station. That's so impressive. Well, can I give you some gossip that is completely unproven? Is TV Gazan comment thread gossip? Sure. Someone on there said that whole fight with Alexis in wherever they were. Costa Rica. Cabo Costa Rica, which is a city in Mexico, in Mexico. Yeah. So that whole fight that they got into Alexis, where they were telling her off of that being pretentious, that was actually telling Alexis off for being pretentious and mean to the people backstage. Like, apparently she's very cruel and talks down to everybody who works on the show. And that's why everybody was jumping on it and saying, you know, you sound like an asshole. Okay. Well, guess what? That changes everything because in the past few weeks, I've actually been a little dare I say team Alexis because I don't like them ganging up on her. But if she's being a bitch to the PAs and the cameraman and the boom dudes, I want them to give her help. Maybe that's why she's no longer with Fox five San Diego. Maybe she was just too much of a terror for Dr. Booty. Yeah. Bimbo terrorist. The other piece of gossip that I have is that also the people on production, they, I think they believe that Brooks is a crook as well because they say the rumor is that he not only is like someone who's leaching off of Vicky, but he's actually, he actually went back and studied old episodes and has like studied her. And like apparently the things that like if you go back in old episodes, he's that he's totally playing her like a fiddle, which we sort of already knew, but he literally is saying things verbatim of what what she wants to hear. And he's doing that because he studied her. Is that kind of like how Vicki would say probably in past seasons? Like, I just want Don to stand up for me and then he'll whisper into her ear like, well, I always stand up for my lady. Yeah, that's actually exactly that is gross. You know what? He is such a great, I mean, it is so obvious. And the fact that Vicki is willing to like fuck up her relationship with her children for him is crazy. But anyway, at the, I mean, are we done with the gossip? Should we just move right into this finale that was out of control? That's all the gossip that I had. Okay, let me just start with a question. Now, does anybody throw a finale better than Orange County? Those parties are always ridiculous. They are those bitches know to bring their A game on those final episodes. I mean, they really, Tamara especially, you know, she, I mean, she is a cold-hearted wench who is very, who has at times can be an extra one of the most vile people on the planet. But she really knows how to bring me entertainment. You know, I have to give her respect because as a seasoned veteran at this point, like these women go into the finales in Orange County going, if there is any doubt in anybody's mind about me coming back for the next season, let me solidify my spot in that cast. Yeah, they, oh, yeah. Tamara Barney, Tamara Barney is a horrible, horrible human being. And I loved how at the beginning of this season, she was playing it all nice. Like, oh, I'm going to be nice to Gretchen. I'm going to be nice to everybody because I'm a different person now. And I've really changed and blah, blah, blah, blah. And I said way back then, of course, the C word is going to come rolling back out. She cannot help it. And you get a couple of drinks into her. Yeah. And her eyes just turn into little slits and she gets those mean, thin lips and her. She just gets vile. Yeah. Oh, yeah. She just gets a vile, that whole fight with Brooks. Oh my God, that was just sick. Okay. So do we think that Tamara truly gave Vicki the evil eye or was she just rolling her eyes at the mere mention of Alexis? Because it could have been that too. Look, I think she's rolling her eyes. Exactly. And what I think she was giving the evil eye to Brooks because she, when she gets like that, she will still fight about any if the mailman brought her mail, she'd be like, you son of a bitch, bringing flat things in me. Thank you. Are you calling me flat chest? Because I got my boobs taken out. You son of a branch. Oh, oh, Tammy Sue. It's also like an implication that if she's given the evil eye that she has eyes that are not necessarily evil. And like, I'm sorry, I think she always has evil eyes. They're like red and they got little flames. And then they're scary. They do. Well, this is the second season that that evil eyes come back because last year was the fight about the evil eye baseball cap. How flavour was most that they then cut to Gretchen and in a confessional going like the evil eye symbol just really sets her off? Yeah. Well, she was she was being ridiculous. And Vicki and her were giving each other dirty looks all night long. And Vicki was yelling at her from across the party when she was being nice to Gretchen. Oh, come on, Tamara, really? Really, Tamara? And by the way, and and and and Vicki had this like novel idea to go up to Tamara and she was going to try to put some brown feces on her nose or something. And it's like, you know what, like if Tamara had tried to do that to Vicki, Vicki would have flipped her shit, you know, and Brooks probably would have said something, you know, would have had a lot of opinions about it, I'm sure. Brooks, by the way, I don't think it was not his place to just he started up with Tamara. He really did. He I mean, he wasn't just like he didn't just like tell her to stop. He was like, Oh, you want to go there? All of a sudden, this guy grew a pair of balls, maybe because Vicki bought it. Well, it's also because Vicki is bitching about Tamara all year long and saying saying all this stuff like, Oh, Tamara's being so mean to me this and that. So he's ready to go. He's ready to jump. And also, he has to solidify his next season too. Yeah, he does. He definitely needs to get I like to have Brooks was just like drunk in the middle of the party asking for Jim Bellino. What was that? He was like, Oh, where's Jim? I really like that Jim Bellino Jim Bellino coming by. I mean, was he drunk or is that his like new $15,000 teeth? Maybe still a little high from the Novocaine or something. Well, Jim Bellino is probably the only one more hated than he is at the moment. Yeah, I'm going to be honest with you. Like after watching last night's, I don't hate Jim and Alexis nearly as much as I used to. Ew, really gross. I'm always hating them. No, I mean, look, I hate, I hate, I hate everybody on the show. Let me just preface this with, I hate everybody except for Brianna and Gina Kehoe. Everybody else is horrible. So I don't know. I just, you know, I do think that Jim really just did want to sit down with Heather's husband to talk about the fact that he called Alexis phony, which she is. But, you know, I think that he was, you know, in his right mind to stand up and walk away when Tamara came over. And it's not about Tamara is bringing the truth and he's running away from it. It's called Tamara Stirrs the Pot and she's a fucking monster. And I wouldn't want to deal with her. Yes, but also his own wife was the one who made him go over there. Well, and on top of that, I actually, I think it's okay. You know, he wanted to speak to Terry, mono, a mono is what they say, although that doesn't make sense. That means hand to hand. But he's, he wanted to speak to Terry. And then all these people came over. So I understood Jim's frustration. And he should have just said, Hey, you know what, let's just do this alone. Let's just have a good time tonight. But instead, he stormed off and he left his wife at the party. That's the problem. That's the problem. Okay. You're wearing the pants of the family that misogynistic fucking asshole. Okay, that was disgusting. That's like, man, he left. He was gonna, he was gonna drive off. He wasn't gonna say to his wife like, Hey, I gotta go. He just bolted right on out of there. And she comes running out. She's like, babe, babe, as if he could hear her when she's like, you know, he's already, you know, what the funny thing is, like, had she not, you know, run into the middle of the road, he would have left her behind in the dust. Yeah, with problems. And he would have blamed her for it. So he would have been like, well, you know, you made me come to this party. No, no, no, she didn't. I don't think that she made him come to the party. First of all, I think producers made him come to the party. Yeah, but you would have blamed the producers. He would have been like, the stupid show that you're doing. Well, look, you have to admit, I, you know, I think he's trying to please his wife who clearly wants to be on TV. I don't think that he wants anything to do it. Oh, come on. Okay, here's the deal. Here's the deal. I could be, I could be kind of on that side of Jim Bellini, that didn't have his own fucking blog, giving his opinion about every episode and how much of an asshole everyone is. That guy is too much of a pussy to show up and do it on TV because he knows he'll lose. Okay, but first of all, by him calling everybody an asshole, is he really wrong? No, no, but he's not doing it to their face. Yeah, he's like, like any of these backstabbing bitches do listen, yes, they do. Did you see that camera always brings the truth? Here's the thing. What I loved was the way how at the end of the episode, when they give like the recaps what they're doing now, it says, it says Alexis is no longer with Fox five and there's a pause and it goes she and Jim are opening a trampoline park. I have to be completely honest right now. Nothing on TV makes me happier than those freeze frames with those two bullet points per I mean, it is the best part of the season to me and what also shows you where the producers what the producers think because if the producers like them, then they get like a generally nice thing if the producers think they're fucking idiots, they get the trampoline park, okay? Yeah. Okay, let's get back. Got a broken neck soon. We need to get back to Vicki and Tamara and the fight because it's spun out of control and I just want to get your like, honestly, I just really want Ronnie to recreate Vicki screaming at Tamara in the hallway. Well, I just love that whole escalation of the fight because as always happens on these shows, one person is in the other person's face and the other person's like, what is this? What are you doing? Why are you yelling at me? Well, and one person is going to fight with you and one person is normally significantly more drunk. Yes, I'm not going to fight with you. We're friends. What are you doing? And then all of a sudden she stands up and it's like greases up her. Greases up her hair, takes out her earrings and she's like, is there nothing more terrifying when Vicki points a finger in your face and screams? I mean, my God, it's terrifying. But this one was special because I like the other times when she screamed and pointed a finger. This time she had a granny fur on, which especially daddy. All she was missing was a purse to hit Tamara. A shell purse from the Sophia patrilo. We have to thank our lucky stars because the two times that Vicki has exploded this season and has yelled like that. She's been some weird outfit because last time her hair was all done up like the 80s. This has been a great thing for her. Vicki, no. For Vicki. She really does need to get past her super religious roots and just meet a gay person who will tell her. Well, I don't know. I mean, there was a lot of there was a lot of gays swarming up in that party that were like trying to get on camera and it's like just step off boys. We're trying so hard, but none of them. You know, here's if you're very gay on Orange County, you need to you need to like start some shit. You need to throw a glass of champagne at the driveway or something like that. You know, that's how you get on TV. You don't get on TV. If you're gay and in Orange County, you're probably going to get killed. So get the hell out of there. Yeah, that's all I'm going to say. Anyway, okay. What you want to go on? Oh, I wanted to talk about the end of Bo gate because I thought that was effing hysterical. Poor Sarah. When Sarah finally got kicked out of the party and she's kind of half crying outside. Cohen, what is this world coming to? That was the most amazing moment of the season. It really was. That was her Rodney King moment. I loved it. Who was that other whore that was with her? Oh, I don't know. There's there's sort of like this like like generic stuff, like pool of blondes that appear at these things. But I thought Sarah could not have been more wonderfully dramatic at that moment. Is this what the world has come to kicking people out for a piece of cake? Yes, actually, I think that was pretty funny though. I mean, you know, it goes from Heather telling her off. Okay, and then Heather still telling her off and Heather still telling her off. Commercial break. Heather's still telling her off. And then Heather's like, Oh, no. Oh, no. Hey, everybody come in here. Can I get the entire cast in here? Cast Paul, cast Paul 15 minutes till so time. Gonna give it a show speech. All right, everybody tell her off. And then how tragic was it that like Slade was like trying to make his last, last push for the season and is like, no, I'm going to stand up for my new best friends, Heather and Terry and escort her out. Well, he knows where the money is. You know, he knows who he's got to close you up to here. My question is this, do you think Slade would have been a more effective bouncer if you wasn't wearing a black turtleneck? I think the turtleneck throws the whole thing on. I think people didn't take him seriously. They thought he was like a poet of some sort and they thought he wasn't going to beat them up. Yeah, there's some weird fashion in Orange County. He was wearing a turtleneck and Jim was wearing a vest. Don't get me started on that back vest. That was the gayest thing I have ever seen. And I'm talking about gay late 90s. And I'll let this running out into the street in that little hooker rabbit fur. Like, what are you guys doing in the morning? And about Gretchen's cheap feathers and her hair that kept getting stuck in Tamara's lip gloss? Heather, I mean, Gretchen looked like she was in the El Paso musical version of Oklahoma Festival for House in Texas. Or that. Yeah, like, just go to Michael's, grab some feathers for 25 cents a piece and glue them all over those bitches and send them out. How cheap was that nasty ass bracelet she gave Tamara? Oh, okay. This is what this symbolizes. This part is because I like hearts. This part is because you like black. And this part is like, could you have a more shallow fucking bracelet? Let me tell you some more because I know you like malls. Can I just say this? You know, we'd already discussed earlier and all season long how much, you know, Tamara is the most vile human being on the face of the earth. Every time that woman cries, no tears come out of her fucking eyes because she's a faker. Well, she's got evil eye. That's why I just dries up. Well, she's also got so much Botox that her ducks are dried out. I mean, can't haven't you noticed that her nose can't even move whenever she smiles like the very middle part of her nose crinkles up and nothing else moves. It's the creepiest fucking thing. Let's be honest, when she cries, the tears come out of her elbows. Okay, everything's in the wrong place. It's like, why is my big toe leaking? Oh, I'm just crying. And she tries to drop the hat now. Okay, like she goes to McDonald's. She was a happy meal and she talks about how happy the happy meal made her and she starts to cry. Okay, she is out of control. She is out of control. I will give you being mean to me. Um, do you not want it to be screaming and yelling at her boyfriend and calling her was some being control. Do you not remember any that? By the way, what was up with Eddie? Okay, here's this guy, the stupid guy broke to starting up with with your fiance and Eddie's just sitting there. Well, you know, what sort of man is that? He's like sitting there, picking out too. He's like, he's like, he's like popping back popcorn. Like he's watching a good game. He knows who he's dealing with. He's like, I love these crazy bitches. Well, look, he's trying. I mean, clearly he's not in love with Tamara. He's in love with being on camera. Well, he's not sure if he was in love with being on camera, he would have made it. He would have like flipped that table and like punched Brooks, which I think he was taken aback by Vicki's psycho hyena screams. Well, that's, I don't know. There's there are other people who would have been a lot more aggressive. Okay. I mean, I often wonder about that him personally, but also I wonder about heterosexuality, general like when when he's in the car with Tamara and she's one minute, she's all romantic and sweet, but then you see the real Tamara where she's like, well, then you know what Alexis said? I mean, Alexis is just fake and everyone hates her and she's just a fake idiot. I'm going to tell her. And if that means that I have to tell her, I mean, I don't care if I hurt her feelings. I'm all about the truth. I'm just her vile personality spilling out. And the man just stands there and looks at her like, Oh, that's a woman for you. I mean, is it really? Because these shows have made me more secure in my homosexuality than true. Then you just have to watch the A-list New York to have it reset the other way. No kidding. No kidding. I come out of that begging for the giants. Now, yeah. So when Vicki, when Vicki then went out, she threatened to leave, she broke the storm out and everything. And then there's this whole talk and then Brianna goes out there and yada yada yada. And Heather says, I want you to stay. I'm going to do a toast, et cetera. So she finally brings, she finally gets Vicki back in for this toast. Heather gives like a nice stupid toast about the brownies and then Vicki trumps her. Yeah, then all of a sudden Vicki goes, and I'd like to give a toast to say, I'm sorry for storming out. But I love Brooks and you're either in or you're out. That was totally inappropriate. I'd like to give a toast for you never being able to have a party that isn't about me. Yeah, like, yeah, I don't think that's that too well with Heather. I mean, after Bo gate now, can anybody else steal her thunder? Yes, Vicki. Yeah. Oh, if Heather stays on the show, which I think she probably I think she saved herself with Bo gate. She is going to, I don't think her and Vicki are going to get along very well. Oh hell no. I thought Heather really proved her metal when she's going after Sarah. So Heather's pretty calm. But when you when you finally rattled her enough, she is ambitious with her put down. I know. I know. I mean, no, she's like, she's clearly way smarter than everybody else. So her, her, you know, her put downs are, you know, up there with the countuses, which is saying a lot. But I just really wanted her to go, Hey, bitch, I'm going to kick you out and like brought over. I mean, there was bodyguard sitting in the foyer. Why didn't they just drag her out by her hair? The most awkward bodyguards. You see the way they like came into frame and then like froze, then quietly stepped backwards. Like, yeah, but I wanted, I wanted her to be, I wanted her to be physically removed from the house, not by sleigh. No, but I was Heather's way of doing it because the way Heather attacks, it's a little different than Luan. Luan attacks with cold, waspy condescension. With the way Heather attacks is she just sort of like, she just just attacks you with words and takes you down and acts like a mom. And then by the end, you're just like a little puddle of crying mess. You're like Sarah, they're wondering what the world has come to because you've been totally taken down by this crazy woman who gets her way no matter what happens. Okay, well, let's talk. I mean, who do you think is coming back from the cast? What kind of changes are you expecting? I mean, obviously, we saw, you know, everybody's all right ups at the end, but the freeze frames, Vicki and Brooke seem to be on again, off again, on again, off again. But like, who's coming back? Where are the alliances? What are we, what are we to expect for next season? I believe that they start shooting typically in August. So, we'll see. I guess that Alexis will be the only one out and replaced. You think you really think this will be replaced? You think so? Well, who's she gonna shoot with? She has nobody there. I mean, she doesn't have Gretchen. She does Vicki. I mean, she's gonna hang out with Vicki. I mean, I was never gonna have I mean, everybody's been talking about that this year, but I just don't see that being able to like sustain itself for 18 episodes. What a friendship with Vicki? Yeah, I don't see the two of them hanging out at all. And Vicki's only being front, Vicki's only talking to her to make Tamara mad. I mean, you can see it in her face. She has no desire to say anything. What do you say to Alexis? She's a fucking moron. Okay, so you think Alexis is gone, Ben and I think Ben and I are probably a little bit more on the fence right there because I don't think anyone's gone. I don't know why anyone that I think everyone's there. Okay. Well, do you think that there's any additions? I mean, do you think I mean, I don't think Sarah is rich enough to become a cast member. And you guys know in my dream of dreams, Gina Kehoe returns to, you know, saddle up with Vicki and become. I think that that's a huge possibility. Please, Jesus, listen to me. Please. The thing is that they've never brought back someone. That's the only thing. But why not bring back Gina? She's from the original, the original franchise, the original cast. It would only be like coming full circle, Ben. I would like it. I would like it. And they might as well, because that bitch ain't leaving. I mean, she will find that girl has a good sense for an evite. That's for sure. She sniffs it out like a bloodhound. I would also like Lynn Curtain to come back. I mean, if you if you asked me a few seasons ago, they had the season when Lynn's family basically fell apart. And PSN heard when one of her daughters became a hooker. Yeah, yeah. And that I mean, there's nothing better than watching that. And quite frankly, they took Lynn out of the equation. And I have to say, the Housewives has not been nearly as strong of Orange County, and not been as strong since they took out Lynn. I'm just saying. I think Lynn coming back would be great. I mean, I would give it a Gretchen. I think Gretchen is done. I'm sick of Gretchen. I think Gretchen needs to lose Slade, and then she can stay. This Halloween, ghoul all out with Instacart. Whether you're hunting for the perfect costume, eyeing that giant bag of candy, or casting spells with eerie decor. We've got it all in one place. Download the Instacart app and get delivery in as fast as 30 minutes. Plus, enjoy $0 delivery fees on your first three orders. Offer valid for a limited time, minimum $10 per order, service fees, other fees, and additional term supply. Instacart, bringing the store to your door this Halloween. With Credit Karma finding the right credit card for you is easy. Our app analyzes user profiles to suggest personalized recommendations. Visit credit karma.com today to explore cards tailored to your needs. Credit Karma, simplifying your financial choices. Gretchen was good when they all hated her. Well, when Vicki and Tamara hated her. But now she's just not- But look, Tamara is not going to be able to sustain a friendship with her. Tamara is the evil devil monster whore. So it's like, you know, she and Gretchen are clearly going to rub each other the wrong way at some point. And it will be about Tamara and Vicki going at it. Gretchen will be an ally. Gretchen's going to be so boring. Let me ask you this. It's going to be nothing but her and Slade fighting. It's going to be the worst ever. Do you think that there is any possibility that they would up Brianna to Real Housewife just because she's fighting so much with Vicki and it makes for great TV. And she is also a newlywed. No. Well, she's also a housewife. That's true. She's not interesting enough on her own. That is a lie. I love her. Well, it's just a look at her. She went to Vegas and had the most boring Vegas trip ever documented on reality TV. I mean, seriously. That's true. Well, I have to say that the Orange County women have really upped their game in the past couple of weeks. Yeah. And I think that we look at it from a different perspective because we enjoy making fun of them. But they're so sucks. I mean, it's not fun. They don't do anything. The best thing apart, the best thing about this show is listening to the terrible English. Like Alexis makes me laugh every time because she can't talk and Gretchen learning the word. However, however, however, however, it cracks me up like no one's like that. Make me laugh. But I don't think this is a very good one. I mean, that's kind of a good point because at least like the New York cast has like real events to go to. Whereas in the OC, it's just like unless somebody's having a party at like a bunker party on their back deck, like, what the hell are they doing? Listen, yeah, the truth is this, Orange County is just a boring place. Okay, I'm just gonna say it. Okay. So if you put a TV show there, the TV show ultimately will be boring. Yeah, like what were they gonna go the opening of the new book at a pepa? Like they're gonna go to like these bitches. They're gonna coast the mace out of them all there. I was gonna say like a red carpet opening at Chico's coast of Mesa. Well, have we finished with this show? We've got a lot. The house was this week tapped. Oh, wait, one last question about Orange County. After all this with the cake, did anyone ever see anyone eat the cake? Did anyone actually eat it and enjoy it? Yes. Take a take a guess who ate it. Vicki Vicki Vicki, fucking Vicki, who's just naturally never gonna be as thin as anybody else because God hates her. Like sitting in there, she's like eating the cake. This is delicious. Oh, I never thought I'd be treated like that by a good friend. I never thought a good friend would do without him. Your camera's on. Have some respect. If Brooks really, if she and Brooks really do break up or if they're no longer together right now, you know, she's 472 pounds. Oh, yeah, they're together. You also know, by the way, that Brooks totally took a doggy back home from that party. Oh, well, exactly like me. I keep those disposable, those disposable Tupperware things, you know, that you can buy in the grocery store. I keep those in my trunk. Oh, my God. I have learned it. I'm learning way too much. I like the way you work, Ronnie. I'm moving to the OC, baby. Steal some cakes. Steal some fondant bows. You have a collection. You're a fondant bows, Mugler. I love what is the world coming to? Oh, my God. At least they aren't you excited they gave her a close up for that line. It was all that fake. It was funny about Sarah is that she's one of those young old people where sometimes she looks like she's like, you know, 28 or 31. And sometimes she looks like she's 55. I love that one. People are like that. I'm so fascinated. I can't stop looking at them. Yeah, Sarah, you can tell with her lips. Sometimes they get that old lady look, but whoever she's seeing, she's got the best plastic surgeon on the show. She looks, I think, very good. Either that or she's really young and doing a lot of meth, which is possible to. Well, it is the OC. Yeah. What else is there to do? Meth and the Mahan customers. South coast Plaza. Well, I'm sure. Oh, my God. I'm sure. Okay. We could clearly talk about those for an hour. So should we move to New York or should we move to Jersey? In life, I would prefer to move to New York over moving to New Jersey. But in terms of talking about these shows, I'm fine with either one. Take it away, Matt. Okay, let's talk about New York briefly, because I think Jersey was way juicier this week. So New York pretty much was just all about, you know, a party for Sonya for some magazine that nobody reads because nobody reads magazines anymore. I'll tell you that magazine. Okay. The only people who read that magazine are those housewives because every season, one of them winds up on the cover of it. And I don't think anyone reads it. What's it called? Social Life Magazine or something like that? I think they read Social Life Magazine. I think they read like Hampton's Weekly because Kelly Killer and Ben Simone is on the cover every summer. Because it's always the same girl. You know, the editor in chief of social life magazine, she always shows up on camera. She did it this year. She did it. Bethany was on the cover and everything. So yeah, clearly, clearly there's a deal there. But anyway, the point was that Ramona is clearly still upset that she wasn't invited by Heather to go to London for. You were invited to London? I wasn't invited to London. Maybe she just forgot to invite me to London. Maybe if we have one together and I'm nice to win, then she'll think to invite me to London. Surely she'll invite me to London. Maybe I just need to run into her in the street. Maybe it's like, Oh my God, that fucking woman. Okay, so honestly, did anything else happen the entire episode? First of all, okay, here's one thing that happened. Sonya is quietly turning into Mrs Havisham. Okay, she's sitting there in her bed with her little tray of like chocolate drink. And she has her little intern doting over her. Okay, don't you love that she thinks that's a diet drink when clearly it was semi sweet chocolate chips from the freezer melted into a Mason jar? I was like, Oh, I'm gonna do that. Meanwhile, it's a health drink. It's a health drink. I mean, could there be anything like more a high low culture than that moment of watching this woman who was a former Morgan? And here she is reading the posts and drinking a weird chocolate drink while some like woman is like doting on her and like the roof is caving in from Hurricane Irene. Pan across one of the rooms. Don't you just feel like there are like dirty stacks of the newspapers and like mouse droppings everywhere? Everywhere, everywhere. And you know, she actually mentioned Hurricane Irene again this week, I think. I think she was saying like, Oh, you know, the divorce, the divorce and the dead and the movie deal in Hurricane Irene, I'm like, no, it just stops. Stop with Hurricane Irene. Okay. The other things are fine, but you have to stop having ownership over Hurricane Irene. Okay, there are houses that blew away in Vermont. Okay, covered bridges that were 200 years old that were swept into rivers. And you have a leak that's there because as Matt has mentioned many times, there's five blackberries clogged in your toilet has nothing to do with Hurricane Irene. There are five blackberries in the toilet. And she can't afford to get a roofer and pay him $80 to clean the fucking gutters. I find Sonya to be so phony. Like this whole thing, this whole character thing she's doing, I just think it's so sad, you know, it's like, Oh, please, let's read the post because that's the only way I know what my friends are doing. You know, I just have to read about them in the newspaper because I don't know how to check my voice and it's like shut up. I mean, it's fairly obvious. I mean, everybody saw what Bethany did and how she and it made her empire. And I just think that like Sonya is trying to create this Sonya in the city brand and character. And guess what? That ship has sailed. It's not gonna happen sale to Best Bar because I'm gonna get myself a Sonya toaster oven. Okay. No, I'm saying, I'm going to say that it was sailing to quag. Oh, no, that's just nasty. Okay, I would never say that. I mean, quag, it's just one of those places that was cool and then just wasn't cool. Just like Cindy Barshop. I mean, Cindy Barshop was never cool. She is the quag toaster oven of the real housewives. Now, here's what I'd like about. Here's what I like about the Sonya angle on this episode. It wasn't just that Sonya has this weird thing going on in her bedroom, but I'm kind of loving Luan's stealth campaign to turn Sonya against Ramona. I mean, Luan is so unsettled. She's like, no, I've noticed like you and Ramona like, you know, does she always tell you what to do? And you like that? You're fine with that. You're fine with her saying that because it seems sort of rude to me, but you're fine with that. That's strange. I mean, you're, you seem totally controlled. Yeah, let's get a salad. Yeah. So would Ramona let you eat salad if you want a salad or she probably wouldn't let you, would she? What do you feel about that? Feel like you're in prison? You know, it's whatever, whenever you mention salad, Ramona gets so mad at you and then she whispers into your ear and you look so uncomfortable. And I mean, I just wouldn't want you. That was pretty good when she said she comes up behind you and whispers in your ear and you make this look. And Sonya made a look like Jesus, Luan. And Luan's like, yes, that look right there. God, do you see that? Luan, Luan is really a very clunky manipulator. But God bless her because I love watching her. I love watching her at work, you know. She's just, yeah, she's not subtle at all. She's getting worse as the years go on. Come on, let's meet for lunch ladies. Oh, wonderful to see Ramona blackmailed me. Okay, I'm off to meet Doc. Have nice lunch. She is a paranoid mess and I love it. She really doesn't like to waste time. She really wants to get this this manipulate. She wants to turn everyone as soon as possible without saying, Hey, everyone, can we just turn on her? She's just going to do it like she's like, okay, I'm turning down. I'm talking to you. Let's get this going. Okay, Ramona's bad because of X, Y and Z later. Exactly. The sad thing is that Sonya is the pawn here. It's like, Oh, really? Are we fighting over that? Sonya has no idea what's going on. Okay, she thinks she's in some castle in the middle of Italy. All right. She really, I mean, my God, I mean, if she is so well connected with all these royals, can one of them hook her up? I mean, seriously, by the way, I don't think she's well connected. I mean, I think what's your divorce? Once they leave you, you're done. You're shunned. You're out. Okay. She's connected to her like the Kansas City Royals. I think she's just she can't afford season, take us to the Yankees so she goes to see. I was going to say, I think she might have done the catcher from like the 1984 team. I get some barbecue. I get some barbecue. I see some boys. It's great. I love it. Well, we did see her last year or two years ago. She does like to wear a sexy softball uniform. Yeah, exactly. Oh, God. God bless her. She just smells like musty. I just I don't even want to think about Sonya. Take the subject. I don't even want to know what her lady toaster smells like, but I think it smells like a mixture of talcum powder and horseradish sauce. I'm chocolate because you know she scratches down there. Guys, those are all wonderful things. Why are you giving this on you? You know that that's a leaky toast. It smells like sardines and best massage. And we and we were calling Jim Bellino the misogynist. Listen, it smells like a night at home. Three day old kale. Three day old kale. Let's be honest. It really smells like it smells like pork shoulder with rutabaga. I think it smells like wet nickels. And when you're done, when you're trying to get all this out of the jar and you spill the juice on the counter and you smell up the next day. I think it smells kind of like like peach yogurt that may have expired. With a dash of pumfron. I think it smells like dog food when you accidentally get it wet. Mixed with onion that you can't get out of the bottom of your sink. I think it kind of smells sort of like a springtime medley salad in a box thing mixed with perhaps mixed with like a little bit of cardboard and a little bit of a little bit of like a little bit of like balloon. You know the way balloon smells. Okay. I like I have diet quote coming out of my nose. Oh, you know what it smells like? It smells like starting coming out of Matt's nose. Guys, look at me. I have Matt's nose mixed with it. I don't know. Okay, so speaking of stinky vagina, what do you guys think about Ramona not being able to go to London? What do you think about that? I think it's a little well here. Here's the thing. I mean, I think it's a little mean. I do. If you're gonna invite Luen wrong with you, Ben. It's okay. If you're gonna invite everyone but not Ramona, it's a little callous. But if Heather's willing to accept that and she seems actually like she's gonna stand behind it. That's why it's good because Heather is willing to just be like, yeah, I don't like you. I don't think we're friends. You're not fucking invited. Yeah, I mean, it is kind of amazing watching Ramona squirm and trying to passive aggressively show how inclusive that she is as well. But yeah, how fun would they had? I think it's totally country because in the real world, it's not just a trip to London. It's a two week shooting spree. So why say by not inviting her, she's cutting her out of shooting on purpose. Like she's trying to push her out. Yeah, it's like the new girl comes in and tries to push out the reigning queen. Bitch, you better watch it. You better watch. The reigning queen is Countess Luen, not Ramona. Well, she only got an invite because Heather decided to play it safe. Yeah. Well, now here's my question, though. Here's my question about Heather. Is she phony or is she real? Because you could say that she's keeping it real because she's not giving a disingenuous invitation to Ramona. But you could say she's being... Holler! Holler! Because you could say she's being fake by being so friendly to Ramona. You know, although they're drinks. They're all fake to each other and they all give like double league bullshit kisses. I actually like the fact... I mean, Heather's voice makes me want to kill myself, but I do like the fact that she's just like not having Ramona's bullshit. But you know, I think it's fake because she's pretending like she's even paying for this goddamn trip in the first place. When you know that that's not true, it's a bravo trip. They have to take one every season. So for her to be a bitch to somebody is just not... Even though Ramona is one of the most aggravating people on the face of the earth, don't you? But I don't believe that this is going to be like the big trip of the season. It's a weekend trip. Well, it's still it's still it's, you know, everyone's going to be shooting together except Ramona. It's true. There's something about Heather when... There's something about her phoniness. Like, you know, we agree. Everyone's fake. Everyone is fake. But there's something about hers that comes off that's particularly obnoxious to me. Like, you know, there's some sides of Heather that are cool. But when she's being fake, she's so extraordinarily fake and she can just become very mean very quickly. It really is a turn off for me. Like, awesome. When she was having drinks with Ramona, she got pretty... She sort of was like, everything was like, fun and nice. And then all of a sudden, like, you know, Ramona's like, "Well, we're new friends, new acquaintances." And she's like, "Are we?" It's like, "Oh, okay." That was awesome. That was awesome. Well, Heather, you know, Heather just wants to do that whole smiley. I'm a friend thing because she doesn't think it's worth her time to fight with somebody, which I think is right. But, you know, in a way, that's looking down on somebody. If Ramona is telling you if she's making all this effort, you know, and you're just smiling to her face because you don't think it's like even worth your time to fight with her, that's cunty, you know? Okay, okay, okay. Call me crazy and don't queue up with the Carly Rae Jepsen, but look, if I were Heather, I would still be pissed and I would have a hard time letting it go that I came over to your house and you were a fucking bitch to me and told me that I talk too much when you really don't even know me. I would not be able to let that go and I would be like, "Fine, fuck you, I don't want to be your friend." Yeah, but Ramona would go to Michelle Obama and be like, "Oh, my God, hi, Michelle. I know black people. I love black people. You grow vegetables because that's disgusting. Do you know that those are grown in poop?" She did. So, basically, you're married to a president and you're eating poop every day. I mean, that's disgusting. How could you do that? Oh, my God. I love your house. She doesn't know. She's a fucking street guard. And remember, this is the same woman who went up to the then governor of New York, David Patterson, who's blind and started talking to him about how she sort of has vision problems, okay? Like, as soon as Heather talks about her, you know, sons, you know, kidney or liver disability, well, Avery was born with an umbilical cord around her neck. I mean, she is the queen of stupidity. So, you're right. I don't believe it. I don't believe it in her own way. I mean, I think that it was rude, but Ramona said, to Heather, for sure. But, I mean, it was, but I mean, I don't believe for one second that Heather did not watch every single episode of this show before she came on it. Right. I honestly don't think that Carol would have bothered. I think Carol was just like, "Fine, I'll show up," whatever, but Heather studied those tapes. Yeah, I'll be on the TV. Oh, TV. Oh, look how colorful. Look how flat I look on the TV. Oh, wow. Look at us. Look at us in London. I feel like we're like the one percent. Let's go by the protest and feel real. Oh, one person's protest is another person's post office. Like, what the fuck is she even talking about? You noticed that every scene that she's in without the other woman is like art, like beautifully art directed. I swear to God, she has a team of like 40 people there that are like, no, use this cashmere tank top. No, sling your vintage Nikon camera this way over your shoulder. Like, what the fuck? Well, you know, she did work for Diane Sawyer and Peter Jennings, so she may have just picked up a few things, you know. Did she mention that by the way that she used to work for Peter Jennings and Diane Sawyer? No, no, no. What did she do for them exactly? Well, she used to work for Peter Jennings and Diane Sawyer, and it was, I mean, it's crazy she'd go to Afghanistan and stuff. But, you know, that's all on account of the fact that she used to work for Peter Jennings and Diane Sawyer, so I haven't seen a protest like this since I was in Afghanistan. Shut up. I felt really on the upper east side with the one percenters than I have with these protests. You're comparing the fucking Wall Street, Occupy Wall Street dorks with Kandahar. Well, that was, you know, she did actually have a, she had a few funny lines. She's sort of getting there. She had some funny lines about how Luann always his name dropping random like royalty in Europe whenever she's around Carol, which that was- I like Carol. Don't get me wrong. I'm making fun of her, but I like her. She's my favorite too. She's my favorite too. She looked great by the way at the, at the party with her hair pulled back and everything. She looks fantastic. She's beautiful. I just think it's- No, her mouth, her mouth is fucked up. Come on. Well, also, she got her teeth before they were perfected. I'm telling you, anybody who got those porcelain teeth put in before like five years ago, God bless them because they've come such a long way, you know. Those things are like a foot out of her mouth. I know. It really does mess up that upper lip. Yeah, but it makes her look like she's one of the 99 percenters now. So it's okay. That is true. Yeah. Oh, sorry. Go ahead. No, I was just going to make a point about the London trip. But if you're going to talk about Carol, we'll talk about Carol. Oh, I was going to talk about her gay slave. Oh, yeah. She's the only one that's got to happen. Who's that? Whatever his name is. Well, I love that she wouldn't just admit that like that's what the deal was there, but she's like, yeah, he's my little gossipy bitch that does a neighborhood watching whenever I snap my finger so he licks my boots. Yeah. And then she and then she has this weird thing. She's like, yeah, we like to just sit on the stoop and talk about things. I'm like bull. Oh, like she's fucking Marla Gibbs and it's two, two, seven. Yeah, exactly. Like she sits on a stoop, you know, they are. We're on the milk crates talking about talking about Jackie, please. She's getting her hair braided up. Hey, Mary, what you doing down there, Mary? Mary. Oh, Mary. Mary. Oh, Mary. That girl used to be on the news, Mary. Was that pearl or was that song? That was pearl. Oh, my God. You're pearl and you are hanging out the window. Oh, my God. Hey, what's that 99% about Mary? What about Lesta? What about Lesta? 99% of people is mad. That's a lot of people, Mary. Mary. Oh, Mary. Mary. Oh, I got to go on those coaches. I got to, I got Mary, I'll sing up on the upper side. I got to look pretty for Mary. Hashtag 227. So clearly, Luann is Sandra. Carol is pearl. Who's the most boring one? The most boring one is Rose. So Rose is Aviva. Ramona, Ramona is Brenda because she's always getting into trouble. How Brenda Jenkins. Brenda Jenkins. By the way, I love this analogy and I will cherish this podcast because we brought two or seven into it. Finally, took 22 episodes, but we got. What the hell else happened on New York? I felt it was like boring and nothing happened. We're talking about there was a lot that happened. So first of all, the other stuff that happened was that Ramona got wasted at this party and it was the first time we saw a crazy drunk Ramona all season where she. Oh, that's true. That was great. She was a mess and then she got mad at Sonya for going on this trip and Ramona's feelings. I didn't really understand Ramona's point. She was just drunk at that point. She was a sloppy mess and Mario regulated her in the bathroom. Yeah, her point was that her stupid bimbo friend is standing there like, Oh, look, you didn't get invited? Well, I don't get invited everywhere, Ramona. What's the big deal? Do you invite me everywhere? I don't get it. And that's not the point. She's getting cut out of shooting. And Sonya's like, Well, who gives the shit? I'm going with the girls. The other thing, this is the point I was going to maybe bring up before was that Heather had a leg to stand on when she was saying how like, you know, we all want to brunch. We had such a fun time. I thought, you know what? I'm going to London. Why don't we all go to London? That makes total sense. You guys want to brunch. It was fun. But then you invite Luanne and then it's not you can't. You don't have that excuse anymore. Now it's really like you invited everyone but Ramona. It's it's bitchy. I'm sorry. You know, it would be really funny if she then invited Kelly killer and Ben Simone and Cindy bar shop and Mario and Avery. And the entire staff of truth, Faith Jewelry or true renewal. She can invite the cast of the A-list New York. Oh, by the way, at Suny's party, did you notice that little redheaded queen from A-list New York? Yes, that little horrible queen. The characteristics want to be bitch. Oh God, he's horrible. J was like mugging for the camera. I didn't know horrible human being. Like whenever there was a fight, he's standing right behind it and looking staring straight into the camera like bitch. Really? I had this thing where I think I mentally block out anyone who's on the A-list New York. Well, side are but according to Reichen's latest tweets, the show got canceled even after they had started filming. So, Toodles TJ. Well, isn't that isn't logo not gay anymore? I heard that they were just sitting away in the gay mix. Yeah, they might want to change their name from logo. Well, they're trying to go do things that are gay, friendly programming like Bravo, but it's not necessarily explicitly like rainbow colored flags, you know, that kind of thing. I'm embarrassed to ask this, but why would they have to change their name from logo? What does logo mean? Yeah, I don't know that. It just sounds well made just sounds gay. Okay, great, Matt. Oh, I thought maybe it was like a gay thing. Well, I'm assuming the L&G have something to do with a lesbian and gay, but I could be wrong. Just being narrow-minded. Oh, Matt, very good. I just don't see things. I don't see subtle things. Could you be your housewife? Yeah. Why don't we move on to New Jersey? Wait, wait, did anything happen to one leggy peg leg of Eva? Yes, she went into an elevator and nearly had a heart attack. Oh, she's ridiculous. That woman has no fucking interesting... She continues to throw the box. Oh, I have such phobias. Really, like Kyle on Beverly Hills last year because I really don't need to see that. She can't go on a free fabulous trip to London because she's a... Because her husband won't hold her hand on the airplane. She doesn't want to be trapped in machinery. What can you say? You can't fight with that. Someone doesn't want to be trapped in machinery. You can't put them in a machine. Okay, good. You don't know how many conveyor belts there might be in London. Yeah, you know how hard it gets to do security checkpoints, would you have to put her bags on the belt? I was going to say, imagine her baggage claim must be a fucking nightmare. She has a hard enough time going to the supermarket and checking out, okay? She can't get near her. She can not get near the TSA. Oh, please. It's like she goes into a supermarket. There's too many germs there. She'd have to wear her fucking gas mask and take a sip-row. She walks in and something looking like the Michelin Man. It's her protective year that she stays away from the conveyor belt, gets her hummus and leaves. With all of her children who have mixed up names because she changes them every five minutes. God, I really like that of Eva. That woman, that woman really struggles to be interesting. We should make, we should make t-shirts that say that. That is just like, that's like, that's like, that's a Luan type of put-down. We don't, I feel like there's more. I think she's gonna work. I think we're gonna get something out of it, Eva. Don't you worry. Look, she married a manslaughter. Okay, this guy who slept with everyone. She married a manslaughter and we did see in the season preview that she calls Ramona and Sonya white trash bitches. So we know the goods are yet to come. Yeah, they'll, they'll be sick. Well, she's already stirring the pot. So she's doing a pretty good job already. Yeah, she's fine. She's just, she's just quiet, but she's, she's getting things going. She's, she's mixing things up. Yeah, for her. Agreed. All back down. Okay, Jersey. We've been talking a long time, but we got to talk about Jersey. Yeah. Oh my God. Teresa. Jesus Christ. I love that Teresa has absolutely zero self-awareness. Yeah. And she thinks that everyone else is as stupid as she is. Oh, so you lost your two friends. So now you're going to call your family the very, it's like the second she walks out of there. She's like, hi, cat. Can we have lunch? Well, mom, my question is this. So, you know, later in the episode after the fight, which I'm sure we'll talk about very shortly, Melissa, she, she confronts Melissa about what she talked with Danielle and Melissa owns up to it. Melissa was very upfront and said, I did it. I was in a bad place. I was angry at you. I was hormonal. I did it. And Teresa accepted her apology. Do you think Teresa would have accepted that apology if she hadn't already lost her friends? Hell no. Hell no. She would have. Yeah. I think that you would have because no, I think she I think that I think she would have done exactly what she did, which is not really accepted because she she kept saying, I'm sorry. And then Teresa was like, well, you did it though. You did it. She's like, yeah, well, I'm sorry, but you did it, but you did it. You know, she has that like Tourette's where everyone's against her. Yeah. And I think that she still would have done that. But that never happens on these shows. No one just says, I'm sorry. No, you know, it's hard to say. So we wouldn't know. Sorry. Sorry. It seems to be the hardest word. I like that version of it. Is that like a song from the 70s or something? Kind of. Well, there's also a Chicago song. It's hard for me to say, I'm sorry. Oh, I know. I love this. That was my Chicago. That was my Peter Satera right there. Well, there was a tweet that came out the other night, but it's Melissa Gorga that said something like, Oh, well, I never got my apology. It's like, Oh, shut up, Melissa Gorga. I actually only think I like Melissa Gorga. What about Kathy? Oh, and Kathy, but Kathy has been they've been they haven't I haven't had enough Kathy in the past few episodes. I got to be real. Let me tell you something. We this is all you need to know about Kathy from this last episode. We saw her like gardening. Okay. And she had like a little straw hat on and she had a garden trial and she was in her in her little bushes. And to me, I was like, Kathy has done her part for this episode. I am happy. She's gardening. Well, and then she met Teresa and had a veggie wrap. And she listened to Teresa Babble like a psychopath. And then she questioned Teresa's motives. And then she was gone. I need more. Yeah. Oh, I always need more. I always need more. Don't get me wrong. I'm sorry. You know what I don't need more of on display parties because guess what? The single didn't take off. It's not Tardy for the party. It's not even a chic salavi, if you will. So like, stop it already. Stop it. Well, I love Midget Joe's tirade against mean people on the internet. Once she's like, Hey, hey, I don't want to read them. Oh, sorry, guys, I couldn't sit there anymore. You guys, I can't just sit down. I feel like I'm in jail. The listeners for the listeners, Ronnie has like a mobile like microphone thing. And when he gets up from his chair, he turns into a robot, but he's sorry sitting in his chair. Like a good, like a boy, right? No, you sound good now. Okay. Any I forgot what was going on about a robot voice? No, now I'm mad that I'm sitting here. Your arms are crossed. You're mad. Yes, I am. I'm furious. I'll just play. Oh, wait, I have something to say about that dumb bitch Melissa Gorga. Okay, listen, you guys are talking to Ryan Seacrest. Okay. And he's like, Hey, Melissa. So why do you feel like your own display? Which is I love that Ryan Seacrest makes like 80 kajillion dollars a year for coming up with brilliant lines like that. He's like, Hey, Melissa, so why you feel so on display? And she's like, well, you know, when you come into a new family, sometimes really, so you're going to bring up with your fight with Teresa on the Ryan Seacrest show. And you came into this family years ago, please shut up and stop acting so nice. What all you do is use that witch to make money. Like you can hate Teresa all you want, but she's paying your bills, bitch. Well, not anymore. Now she I mean, I don't know about you guys, but you say that on display didn't take off, but I think it's going to be a huge hit in Romania. Well, yes, clearly, I mean, she's going to probably go on tour with Asa from Shaw's of sunset. And I mean, that would be an amazing double bill in Romania down the road. I would I would pay money to see that, to be honest. I'm not even lying. I would love to see the Angeles on display double feature. Oh my god. I would pay all the money I have. Can we talk about anything on the internet? Because Mitch Joe will be very upset about it. Why Ben? Do you need to tweet photos of him flexing shirtless? Like I made me vomit because it was funny because he was you kind of like it. I think you want to hit those muscles. Yeah, I never I never said I never I've been totally upfront. I've always thought he was he is four foot he is four foot two people and he's bald. That's fine. He got a good ball. Yeah, but you shaved your head. He tries to grow a chia pet. Look, I agree. Well, he does use that spray on hair. Yeah, his hair does look sort of like bad macaroni, but I think that he is still very cute. I like Joe. And I think yeah, I think he's hot. And I really I think that he's got a big one because I've kind of tried to make out the outline of his leaner when they keep showing it. Yeah, and you know, quite frankly, if he had a small one, he'd be a lot more of an asshole and he's like totally cool and confident. So yeah, that kind and also a sort guy you could you could toss him around a little bit. I can't handle how like all these like muscly dudes like him and Juicy Joe, like they think that they're all like muscly, but they all look like they have. Wait a second. They all look like they have pillowy boobs. Okay, first of all, Joe Gorga is muscly. You see those things on his body? Those are muscles. Okay, now Joe actually, I mean, Joe Judas is muscular to you, but he's let it all go to fat. I mean, it really looks like he looks like a big bean bag. And I don't like he's got a lot of muscle. He's just got a lot of fat too. Yeah, I don't like that that pillowy man breast. He literally looks like a pig and I'm not trying to be like me, but he literally has his his body. It looks like a pig's body, you know, it's a very poor sign quality. And I would like to talk about his thoughts on therapy. I feel like every week we're getting a little bit of a deeper insight into his backstory. A few weeks ago, he told a story about how, hey, you know, one time me and my friend, we took out our penises and we're looking at our penises. And now I was like, yeah, you know, I once went to a therapist, you know, I got in some trouble and when I saw all these dodos and I realized I didn't eat therapy as the school just wasn't right for me. That's all. Well, yeah, I mean, it was clearly that entire story, but it sounds like he probably murdered two nuns instead of school on fire. Well, he probably had a fair with another boy in the back of the school and they want to call him in for therapy. And he decided, well, here's the real question. That family is so anti therapy. Gia is going to need more therapy than anybody has ever had in their entire life. And he's going to be like, no, sorry, our family doesn't do that. Yeah, it's it's going to be rough. It's going to be rough. I mean, Gia is going to be at the spearmint rhino in about six weeks. And it will be coyote ugly. Oh, we're all sorry. I don't worry about Gia because she seems like a total famehorfer to me. I think that already, like she's already caused a lot of stupid drama for camera time. I think she's another Teresa waiting to have. Maybe she'll get the summer internship at posh. She can only dream that's a that's a tough one to get. I hear Lauren Manzo is trying to get that one too. Oh, Lauren, let's go there. Let's go there. Let's go. I fucking hate her. Well, first of all, we have to give a little back story to people who've never listened. Matt just lost a lot of weight and he's thin now. Yeah. So he has a natural hatred for anybody who eats. That's kind of true. And I mean, when they did order that pizza two weeks ago, I almost smashed my face through the TV. Me too. And I'm not even on your crazy diet. I wanted to eat it. God, I'm gonna have pizza tonight. I've decided I hate you. Stop having run. Do you want to get pizza? Because I'm getting pizza after this podcast. No, I'm still eating protein too. I just don't lose weight. I hate both of you guys. Okay. Well, how do we feel about this? Lauren Manzo is as you wish she's gotten the lap band. So she gets to be a lazy dieter, which means she is a cheater and just a spoiled rich bitch. Well, yes. Well, lap band is, I think that lap band would be hard to have, don't you guys? Yeah, I don't think anybody having elective surgery is necessarily a smart move. Yeah. Oh, well, Laura, see the pictures of her, though. Did you see her? She she's definitely lost weight and she sure showed to me about six weeks ago. And I was like, Oh, you go on with your bad self. You're looking a lot better. You're maybe you're down to like a size 10. And then to find out that she has had had the lap band, I'm kind of like, that's cheating. You know, I think there are other people out there that have gotten lap and I'm fine with people getting lap band. That is not an issue. My issue is with this whole fucking season has been dedicated to Lauren Manzo's dumb ass blubber. And I don't care. Well, here's my thing about it. It's that there's almost like this quiet pact with the audience that we were going to go on this journey with her. I was going to be tough, but she was going to do it. And she was going to, and we were going to deal with emotions, power walks with the Jacqueline and drink black and drink black water. She would make it happen. She's going to make it happen. And then it's like, Nope, she could not make it happen. But maybe that's because her mom is calling her Chubba Wubs. But I don't know if that's just me thinking. Okay, well, speaking of that, I kind of hate Caroline discuss. I don't hear. But she's fucking horrible. And I love that they're really highlighting what a big see where she is this year. She's like, Oh, well, I told Teresa, I don't want to be friends with the book. I, you know, I don't want to be in the middle of that fight. And then so what someone walks away and she's talking to random extras. Oh, well, you know, look at Teresa, her family only wants the best for her. And she's horrible. She's a horrible person. Like the woman cannot say anything if it's not negative or mean about Teresa. And I'm also at this point, I'm convinced that she did some fucked up shit to Dina. Yeah. Oh, you mean that Caroline did something to do? You know, don't you know the rumor by their fighting? I know the rumor, but I feel like she's probably just horrible to her like all the time. I don't know. I mean, look, I they're both between Caroline and Teresa. They're both acting like idiots at this moment. Caroline's got to drop it. But I have to say, I still have to be, I just can never be on Teresa's side ever. Like as much as Caroline, Caroline's got to contain a little bit. But you know, the thing is also friend divorces are messy. And it's hard to just suddenly just be quiet and just move on as if nothing's happened. You do have to vent a lot, you know? No, that's true. And I mean, poor Jacqueline. I mean, I don't know that she's gonna be able to handle this. Clearly, she couldn't even show up to the last season's, you know, reunion. This was just so devastating for her, but whatever exactly line though, Jacqueline had a good line was when something about like that Teresa's coming is will be due for like billions of dollars. And she goes, well, she's gonna need it for the 11 million dollars or debt she's in. Yeah, that was like the only good dig she's gotten in in what five seasons? Yeah. Hey, you know, just such a fucking idiot. She tells Teresa, I need to keep my distance between you and your family. And then she sees her the very next day and is like, why isn't Teresa looking at me? Why isn't Teresa talking to me? She'll talk to Teresa. What should I say to Teresa? You just told her you don't want to ever talk to her again. So she felt bad. And she's this type of girl that she felt bad. And she doesn't want it on her that the friendship has gone bad. So she has she wanted orchestra thing where Teresa is a bitch to her. And so then she'd be like, well, fine, she's a bitch. So our friendship is over. Right. She just wants to be able to wash her hands of it and and put the blame all on Teresa, which the majority of it does belong there. But she needs to lock that up so she can move on. Hey, do you know who else does that? Ashley? We just got to the core of it. It just got real. Do you know what like watching this entire episode, the only thing I could think is, God damn do I want Danielle stop to walk into that room? Me too. Oh, God. I have a feeling so be sewing up at the reunion. I just have a feeling that we have to cross that bridge. I agree. I think I agree that Danielle has to come back into the make. Everything is perfect. You know what? If she is she if she shows up on the same episode as Dina, I mean, my head might explode. It would be too delicious. Like if Danielle stops shows up, every one would be running around with a chicken like a chicken with their heads cut off because it you know, it's very easy to have like team team Teresa versus team everyone else. But then when you have like a third person that everyone hates and it's like no one knows who the ally with no one knows what to do. It just everyone's going to go. It's chaos. Do you throw a chair going to throw some tomato sauce? Gonna throw some black water? Yeah. I'm team Teresa. So whatever. Okay, Ronnie enough enough of you. I'm staying with team Teresa. Anyone who can say ingredients isn't coming has my love forever. And whoever has a cookbook. Yes, anyone who doesn't know how to cook but has a cookbook. How best selling is my hero. I just got a text. Yay. I'm number one on the New York Times best selling. So so where do we see this going? Like is the rest of this season which you know we're we're more than halfway through. Do we just think it's going to be about Jacqueline and Teresa going at it like cats for the next few weeks? Like what else is there to do? Yeah, that's not what she has to now. She has to be friends with Melissa for a couple weeks. So that can blow up because we know that that blows up at the posh. Yeah, yeah. That's gonna be amazing. Oh, I forgot about that. And Melissa sending tweets like that Teresa's still an asshole. So apparently it didn't really work out with anybody. There's not even why even wonder where is he gonna go because it always goes into a great place. I'm not even concerned. There's so much these people are all so bonkers and they have so many weird issues. You just sit back and let the cards fall. You know what? I'm not concerned. I'm not concerned like for Jersey to be honest because it's it really has been a strong season. OC went out on a bang and we still have two at least two episodes of reunion special which are guaranteed to be amazing. The only fear I have is for for New York to be honest with you because I will also say this. The ratings have tanked. It is only now pulling in half of what Jersey pulls in. Oh, well, it's pretty terrible. I mean, it's not very good this year. You know, it'll be interesting to make mistake by getting rid of too many people. They did. And, you know, I think they got new people all but having Ramona and Luann pulling the same crap when you've got all these fresh faces. I mean, I was I feel weird saying fresh faces about that cast. But you know what I mean? I mean, I think we can all agree that, you know, Cindy bar shop going away, not that big of a loss, maybe even KKB, aka Kelly Ben Simone, Kelly Killerin, Benjamin leaving, not a problem, but no crazy Alex and Simon and no Jill and Ginger. I mean, that is like, that is a serious problem. And the ratings are, you know, tanking as a result. Yeah. Yeah. Well, maybe Jill's boycott is working. Maybe it is. And you know what, as much as we love Carol, as much as we love Carol, the new women are not, they're not good enough yet. Not yet. Okay. So we are we're running out of time. So let's get to some Twitter questions. So, okay. So, Pazem Pogna asks, you didn't butcher that at all. Well, it's P-A-Z-A-M-P-O-G-N-A. So, Pazem Pazem Ponya, Pazem Ponya. So, ethnic. Got all these ethics. He asks, we sort of addressed this already, but he said, who if any of the OC you would cut from the cast now that it's done, save for the reunion. So, I said Gretchen, I would cut. Ronnie, you're sticking with Alexis, right? Well, I think she's hilarious, but I think if someone gets cut, it's going to be Alexis. And I think it should be Heather. But who would you cut, Ronnie? Oh, who would I cut? Yeah. I would cut. I could, I can't do that. I think I would cut Gretchen because I just can't stand her fake, slayed, crazyness. Yeah. All right. So, two for Gretchen, one for Heather. All right. The other question I have comes from a woman named Elizabeth. She actually-- Is that her Twitter handle? She's Elizabeth of Twitter. No. She actually is, she actually emailed this because she's not on Twitter or whatever, but she said, she sent out actually a link to email. But I'll just choose one of her questions, which was, basically, is it me or does Vicky look like a blow-up doll when she, when she leaves her mouth agape? I just think Vicky looks like she's blown up in general the season and that's why, you know, I think wearing that fur coat for the past three episodes has made her look a little extra big. Makes her look like an ostrich, let's be honest. Well, like a, like a chunky ostrich. So she looks like a blow-up doll that was left in the sun and is starting to get melted. Starting to smell like Sonia's toaster oven. Oh, stop. Dead people and frog juice. For Mel in the hide and Swiss shoes. What's another one? Is that it? Oh, that's all we got? That's all I got. I only solicited questions like two hours before the podcast. We can make one. Okay, guys. Well, no. Yeah, let's make one. Bueller wants to know when everyone else on podcast will be as handsome as Rondo. Already happened. BBW Raven wants to know, hey, when can we listen? How can we listen to watcher crappins? Well, you can subscribe on iTunes and you can listen at the SciShow Network. You can come to, you can go to TVGasm. You can come to B-side blog and you can follow us on Twitter. I'm at B-side blog. Ronnie is at TVGasm. At TVGasm. Yeah. And Matt is at life on the M list. Oh, yes. And I want to say, are you finishing up now? Yeah. Because I want to say something real quick. A couple of weeks ago, I said if you came to look at a video on TVGasm, I would leave you ringer is I did not do that. I'm a horrible person because I couldn't figure out. I could not figure out how to upload them correctly. But they're out there right now. I just put up a video recap of the entire season seven of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. So go check that out. And in the post TVGasm, there are also, I think, three or four ringers, one of which is leave a Lexus alone. Nice. So I'm downloading some ringers. Yes. And for all of our listeners out there, I don't think that we've figured out when we're going to do our next episode. I know that next week is 4th of July on Wednesday. So we kind of have to look at the schedule to see what shows are actually going to be airing in the coming week. But thank you guys all for listening and tweeting us your questions and thank you to the side show network for making this happen. And I'd like to thank the Academy. And also, we, they like me, they really like me. I'm not saying who, but we have been in some early discussions and we might have a housewife on the podcast very soon. So everyone stay tuned for that. Wait, wait, you have to tease them. You have to tease them a little bit more. Okay. What should I tease them with? That you my mom that that person might be, let's say disgruntled, disgruntled housewife, someone who has a lot of things to say. And I'm sure a lot of people are could be in, might be interested to hear what she has to say. No, I'm saying, wow, no, I'm saying it's a real deal housewife. It's not like it's not like this is not like someone. It's not like Dana Wilkie. No, it's not like Dana Wilkie. It's not like the, the lesbian from Orange County last season. It's not even Deshawn from season one of Atlanta. This is so even go there. This is someone who has some clout. Okay. Hey, I forgot about Fernando. What's she gonna be on this year? I think Tamara decided that she didn't want her lady parts tickled by another lady and she was exiled. Besides, she was attracted to the smell of Sonia's sister, even more. Okay. Soed. And once we figure out when we're going to tape again, which will probably be this time next week, we'd love for you to tune in, download, check us out on iTunes, follow us on Twitter, all that jazz. So Ben, Ronnie, it's been great. It's been long. Peace out. All right. Bye everyone. If you like Watch What Crapons, you can listen ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey at Wondery.com/survey. Are you in trouble with the law? Need a lawyer who will fight like hell to keep you out of jail? We defend and we fight, just like you want your own children to defend it. Whether you're facing a drug charge, caught up on a murder app, accused of committing war crimes, look no further than Paul Bergren. All the big guys go to Bergren because he gets everybody off. You name it, Paul can do it. Need to launder some money, broker a deal with a drug cartel, take out a witness, from Wondery. The makers of Dr. Death and over my dead body comes a new series about a lawyer who broke all the rules. Doesn't it funny how witnesses disappear or how evidence doesn't show up or somebody doesn't testify correctly? In order to win at all costs. If Paul asked you to do something, it wasn't a request. It was an order. I'm your host Brandon James Jenkins. Follow Criminal Attorney on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcast. You can listen to Criminal Attorney Early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts.
OC Finale, Drunk Ramona, and Jersey Feuds
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