Unlock your imagination with Audible. When you listen to audio content, your mind is free to paint the scenes and feel the emotions of a great story. Audible's extensive catalog is sure to have titles that you'll enjoy, immerse yourself in captivating tales, learn from world-renowned experts, and discover new perspectives all while multitasking or relaxing. There's more to imagine when you listen, and one title that I've been listening to is my friend Neil J. Young's coming out Republican, which talks about the history of gay Republicans. It's super fascinating and super interesting. As an Audible member, you choose one title a month to keep from their entire catalog. New members can try Audible free for 30 days. Visit audible.com/crapins or text Crapins to 500-500. That's audible.com/crapins or text Crapins to 500-500. Have you heard? You can listen to your favorite podcasts at free. Good news! With Amazon Music, you have access to the largest catalog of ad-free top podcasts included with your Prime Membership. To start listening, download the Amazon Music App for free or go to amazon.com/adfreepodcast. That's amazon.com/adfreepodcast to catch up on the latest episodes without the ads. "Ladies and gentlemen, this is The Countess Speaking. We have arrived. Gems, jets, silhouettes, champagne in the sky, fine premieres and fireworks every single night." Hey everyone, welcome back to Watch Your Crapins, a weekly podcast about all things Bravo. I'm Ben Mandelker from bsideblows.com and joining me this week is Matt with Field from Yahoo. What's up, Matt? Hey, thanks. I'm glad to be back after a nice little vacation away from you. Yeah, you had a little vacay and then we were off for Memorial Day. And Ronnie, we've lost in the woods. I believe he's camping tonight, which is a shame because he missed the real housewives of New York City premiere, which we will certainly be talking about. We're going to talk about that. We're going to talk about Real House House New Jersey, a little bit of OC. But mainly, we're going to talk about New York City. And quite frankly, that's all I need. I know that's, I'm sure you feel the same way. I mean, I might have left work early today to run home and watch the East Coast broadcast because it is that important in my life. It is that important. And we'll get to that soon. But why don't we start off with some gossip? I have some gossip fresh off the presses. Okay, well, you hit me with that and then I'll let our listeners hear a little juicy tidbit from my end. Okay, well, I mean, I guess this isn't really gossip. It's more like interesting news. And actually, I've put interesting in air quotes. I'm doing air quotes right here. I was listening to a local radio station out here in LA today, 927, formerly Gill FM, which played exclusively music for divorcees and cougars. So naturally, I love it. Of course. Of course. And they had a promo on the radio today wherein they said that on Saturday, there was going to be a three hour kickoff thing for something called Slade Radio, or maybe it was Radio Slade. Either way, Slade Smiley now has a job. You know, all this talk that he doesn't do anything. He doesn't have a job. He has a job. He's going to be doing weekdays on 927, one hour every day, and he's going to be playing music and doing quote unquote celebrity interviews and gossip and giving you the real inside story. Now, here's the real question. Will he be also dropping in some of his comedy gems? I actually think so, because I then went to the website, the 927 website, and they talk about how he's continuing to do stand-up comedy all across the nation, which is too bad for the nation. Too bad for the nation. I mean, the funny thing is, I really want to slam him for, you know, well, I want to slam him for various reasons, but it's kind of like... Would you say slam? What sort of what do you mean by a slam? I mean it both ways. Let's just be clear. But, you know, at least the guy has a job. I mean, it's not going to be a lucrative business. I think that Gretchen Christine Butte is still where the money's at. But, hey, at least he's, you know, maybe he had to do this in order to marry Gretchen, like maybe that was one of the stipulations. I don't know. I just... I don't wonder who would actually want to hear Slade every afternoon. I mean, look, it's working already because we've mentioned this radio station. And by the way, this is not a Los Angeles radio station. It's based out of like Ventura, so it's like a suburban station that I just somehow gets onto my radio. But, man, I can't think of anything worse than an hour of Slade. Well, to be honest with you, can it be any worse than Alexis Bellino on Fox 5 with the booty doctor? Yeah, I actually think it could be a lot worse because Alexis Bellino with Dr. Booty and her recurring segments, those are hilarious. Those are funny. You know what? She should really win a local Emmy for that. That would be hilarious. I agree. And it could be presented to her by her porn star boss. I think that we should take out an ad in the trades. I would love to. For your consideration, Alexis Bellino. She wouldn't even understand what that means. What are they considering? Oh, that's a way too big of a word. But anyway, I just have one other little tidbit for our listeners out there. I actually had secured tickets, Apple, what I thought were tickets, for Ben Ronnie and myself to go see a taping of Bethany Frankel's new talk show up in Burbank tomorrow. So that we could talk about it next week on the show. But, you know, when I got reading all these emails from the producers, it got ridiculous. And they asked me Ben last week. I didn't even get into it when I was telling you guys that we're not going. They asked for pictures for all of us. They asked like all these ridiculous questions. And part of me is like, if we're not hot enough, do we not get to sit in the crowd? Like I don't understand. For the audience, that's what we weren't going to be on camera. I mean, we weren't going to be guests, right? You were not going to be guests. This is just to sit in the audience. And it really, really pissed me off. So I wrote back to the casting producer, or the segment producer, whatever the hell it was called. And I just said to him, I was like, this is completely ridiculous. You're not promising me that I can sit with my friends. We have to show up like four hours in advance with no guarantee that we're even getting into the show. And you want my photo, because maybe if I'm not hot enough, you're not going to let me be in the audience. This is ridiculous. These are a lot of hoops to jump through for a talk show that in all likelihood is going to be pretty terrible. Well, yeah, I think it's actually only airing this summer in like six markets. So good luck to you. And you're honest. I'm like her biggest fan, or I was her biggest fan. I had her drinks before everybody. I bought the books. I drank the Kool-Aid, the Kool-Aid. And I tried to drag everybody on board. And now this is the repayment for getting out of it. Why are you talking to a casting director or a segment producer? I mean, you should be talking to an audience coordinator or the president. Whatever. Maybe that's what it was, but they were emailing. And I was just like, you know what, forget this. It's not worth our time. It is not worth our time because, excuse me, but we are the proud broadcasters of the Watch what Crapin's podcast. More people, that is not enough. But our podcast Ben, then watch her talk show. Let's get real. Yeah, let's get real right now. And all these people are listening right now. And we're going to say don't get tickets to Bethany. Bethany talks. What's the name of her show? Anyway, it should be called Be Frank. Oh, that's great. That's a great title. They didn't hire me. Oh, wait, I can't even get in the audience. Anyway, let's get real and move on to the mega amazing star powered sensation that is the mirror of the Real Housewives of New York City. Oh, so great to have these women back and have some new faces too. I have to say, this is still my favorite of all the Real Housewives. And watching this 90 minute season premiere, it just reminded me why I'm so many levels, you know, I think that there's no other Real Housewives franchise. Maybe Beverly Hills where a conversation can be so perfectly awkward, you know? You're so correct. Beverly Hills is right near the top of the heap. But, you know, earlier today when I was thinking about how excited I was to speed home through all of the red lights to get home to watch this. I just I remembered like New York is the best. It is. You know, because the thing is this New York and to some degree Beverly Hills, there are some pretenses that they exist in polite society. So when they call each other out for things like interrupting, et cetera, it is just like the most cringe worthy thing you could ever imagine. And the other the other thing here is look, Orange County is so like the land of the bizarre. It's not like a real place. Sorry listeners that live there, but it's just so bizarre and Atlanta. They don't really all have that much money and Miami was a disaster, as we all know, and Jersey is just in its own world, which I also love completely. But in New York, like they do roll in some serious social circles. They do get invited. They do have, like, serious roll indexes and a lot of them have major money. And that's what makes it so much better. Yeah. And yet they will still act like tacky little pours and we love it. But why don't we get started with the introduction of the three new housewives? I know that we were very concerned when we heard that Alex and Jill and especially Kelly, you know, my favorite crazy Kelly and then to a lesser extent. What was that other chick's name? Cindy Cindy that they were writing to us after this season, but are after last season. So we were concerned, but are you now fully on board with the new ladies? I am fully on board. I feel like they actually, at least two of them, fit right in. There's a third one. Who is the novelist? What was her name again? Carol, she's my favorite. Well, okay. So Carol, let's start with Carol, then. Okay. Carol, she one points for me for making fun of mommy's who only talk about their kids. Okay. Can I kind of recite the quote that she said because it was genius. Okay. Carol says this is very paraphrased, obviously, but she goes like, yeah, babies are boring and mommy's they get together just to talk about babies are totally boring. And I don't have time for it because it's all boring. I don't have kids. And I was like, I'm in love with you. Yeah. That's what I thought too. I was like, oh, I love this woman. But then it was like she kind of just like fell off. Everything she did after that was kind of sort of like boring and annoying and her teeth were distracting me and she's sort of pretentious and like acting a little over it. I kind of feel like she'll be that one person. I feel like she'll be okay, but I don't think she's going to bring that much to the table. I have to say, I feel like Aviva and Heather are where it's at for the new girls. There's no doubt about that. The only thing I really like about Carol is that she's really icy and distant and flippant and egotistical and she will be great because she will think that they're all lunatics and just be like, F this, I'm out of here. Yeah, hopefully she'll be the Greek chorus for the season. And that I mean that that seems like it would be the perfect thing for her and she should be because she's a writer so I like to think that she might be somewhat observant. And you know, good for the show for stepping up their writer game because previous to her, the only columnist or writer on the show is Kelly Ben Simone who, you know, that's new, whose new book is out where she claims that she can turn you into a hot person. Yeah, well, well actually, I actually could oddly not believe that, but you know, whatever about Kelly, she's old news, she's gone. She's gone. Okay, well let's talk about the other new ladies and I do agree with you that Aviva and Heather are going to bring the majority of the drama this season. I mean a perfect mix for Ramona and Sonya and a nice tag team combination there, I must admit. Well, you know what Heather's already brought the drama. I have to say, Heather, she is going to be, I won't even say a sleeper bitch, she's going to be a big bitch. She already is a huge bitch. If you ask, wait, wait, wait, can we come up with, is that like the new for a sleeper bitch? That's amazing. That is amazing. Well, you know, when she first came on, she looked sort of sweet. She's got that big goofy grin, you know, and she seemed nice and that, she is the biggest bitch. What are we talking about? I actually liked her after the, after the premiere. No, she, oh, here's the thing. She is so fake. I could not have said that. I could not have said that any gayer, by the way. She is so fake. No, but she is really, she is crazy fake. She, okay, so she has Ramona into her office. They have a nice conversation and then she proceeds to bash her like crazy or how about like, she talks about how she hates Ramona's one-uping one-uping and she hates Ramona's story about Avery almost being a stillbirth. And then she's like, wow, thanks so much for sharing that with me. Like, shut up, you bitch. Look, she does talk mad shit already. I mean, we've seen these women for like 90 minutes and that's including commercials. So behind her back, she is already talking mad shit in the confessionals and she's being fake to Ramona's face. But I would have to be fake to Ramona's face too because Ramona is so reprehensible. So this is like one of the all-time classic like, "Clutch your pearls, gasping moments in Real Housewives history" when Heather had Ramona over to her studio in her office. And when she was talking about her sons having to have a liver transplant when he was six months old, and Ramona won up to her with, well, I thought Avery was dead when I gave birth to her. I mean, Ben, it does not sink lower than that. Well, but here's the thing. I will say this in Heather's defense. I didn't say that I didn't like her. I just said that she's a bitch. And I think that... Which is kind of a term of endearment. Well, she is kind of the ideal Real Housewives character, which is that she can be at once a huge bitch and at the same time you sort of see where she's coming from. It's like, it's like, or not even that you see where she's coming from, you sort of are like, you go back and forth and whether or not you're on her side. It's sort of like, you know, Luanne Ramona, you're constantly going back and forth. Like, do you hate Ramona? Do you love Ramona? Do you hate the Countess? Do you love her? I mean, it's sort of like, that's what makes this show a whole franchise in general, but especially New York, so good because you have these women who you're constantly going back and forth. And, you know, it's like, they're just all evil to each other immediately. Okay, okay. Well, I will say this. At the moment, I know, again, we've only seen one episode so far this season. I am firmly Team Countess and so anti Ramona. It's ridiculous. But before we get into our returning favorites, we also have to address the third new cast member of Viva, who is known as the woman with half a leg missing. And that is just really unfortunate that that is her claim to fame because I actually love her. Well, I was under the impression that her claim to fame is that she is the dating Fran Drescher's brother, which is not the case. That's Fran Drescher's brother, isn't it? Yeah, but isn't that her husband or is she just dating him as what you're saying? Oh, is that a husband? Yeah, they're married with kids. Oh, well, look at her. She has Fran Drescher as a sister-in-law. Good for her. She just moved on up a little bit more. Exactly. She'll probably have a better shot of getting on to Fran Drescher's show. She never married or whatever it's called. She has a better shot than Heather from Real Housewives of OC, reigniting her acting career. Heather Page can't. No longer Heather Page can. I know. Nay Heather Page can't. Now, Dubrow. Dubrow. I'm sorry. Well, no, so here's... I like Aviva. I have really nothing bad to say about her. You know, there was a lot with a leg. Okay, speaking of the... Can we just like get there for a second? So like, I think it's kind of crazy that she is willing during a Manny Petty with cameras on her to explain her tragic accident. And good for her that she's overcome that. Like, I couldn't. I just would never be able to overcome that because I'm, you know, a sad, pathetic person and I would probably kill myself. But was this entire 90 minutes not devoted to her chopped off leg, to Ramona's stillborn child, to Heather's baby with a liver disease, to Heather's father who just died, to Carol's husband who passed away to cancer, and to everybody else who got diabetes and then went blind. Like, what the hell was going on? There were a lot of illnesses going around. I have to say. But, you know, though, I, you know, I, I, I, I thought there was a lot of harping on the leg and I didn't really see the big deal. I mean, like, you know, it was not, it was really not too shocking to me. I mean, I thought it was good that Aviva talked about it. Although the story behind it was sort of like interesting. Like, there was like a something with a conveyor belt and like a farm. I felt like it was like some deleted scene from Footloose or something like that, you know, no pun intended. More like, that was on purpose. I, I, you know, you've rendered me speechless. I was going to say it sounds like something more from saw, but your foot loose one, your footless joke was an unintentional joke was even better. Everybody Footloose. I have a feeling that she could dance better than Julianne Hoff. Is that terrible? I, I, it's not terrible. And I think it's empowering. Okay, wait. Now let's talk about her handicap for one moment. We knew we were in for a good season premiere when the show pretty much opened up with Luanne saying, you know, she's so poised and so graceful and so charming. You never would know she has a handicap. I know. I mean, Luanne, nobody can deliver like a tacky, evil, bitchy, amazing and truthful one liner, like the Countess Luanne de la Sep. I mean, she is just a force to be reckoned to reckon with. I mean, that, that I couldn't believe she said that. I don't think she even realized what she was saying. She doesn't realize what she's saying, but you know, here's the crazy thing. Like a lot of people you look at the Jersey cast and you think like, Oh, the star of that cast is Teresa. You look at Atlanta. You say the star is needy. Some people might say, Kim, you know, I think a lot of people look at the cast of New York and yes, Bethany's an alum at this point. And a lot of people say Ramona is the star of that cast. I just have to say, thank God they did not get rid of Luanne. I think that she is TV fucking gold. Well, she isn't. I don't know if they couldn't get rid of Luanne because Luanne and Ramona are too amazing. Like, I don't even know that Ramona is considered the star. I often think of Luanne when I think of New York, you know, I think of Luanne first, then I think of Ramona. Oh, actually, honestly, back in the day, I thought of Jill. I thought Jill kind of summed it up altogether. Yeah, well, she screwed herself with that last season. So, too, Jill, but anyway, let's talk about the Countess and Ramona. Clearly, there's still major issues last season. One of them, the big fights that we followed throughout the season was Ramona's way of criticizing Luanne's parenting skills. She said that she was only a weekend mom because obviously she was spending time in the city with her new boyfriend, Jacques, and the kids were staying in the Hamptons where she only went for the weekend. She threw in a lot of other digs and then it got really nasty at the reunion and they were really going at it from, you know, separate couches. It doesn't seem like those heels are those wounds have healed. Do you think that they can ever patch things up or where do you see this going in the next few weeks? They can never patch things up. This is probably... Okay, let me ask you about... Can they never patch it up because Ramona can't say I'm sorry or because Luanne would never forgive her? I think it's both. I mean, first of all, these two women are so up their own asses that they both can't see how or why they piss each other off. Luanne never sees how anything she says comes off wrong and Ramona refuses to believe that, you know, refuses to apologize for anything because she feels like she's just saying the truth, but she doesn't realize she hides behind this idea that like, you know, you know, she shouldn't have to apologize for saying the quote-unquote truth. She doesn't think that she can hurt anyone's feelings, but the thing is this. The reason why it would never work out is because they have like four seasons, this season five, season six of New York. This is five. They have four seasons of simmering tension. That's so bad. We have... If you go back to season one, I think it's season one, you know, you have that thing that happened at the Cancer Society, you know, where Ramona called out Luanne for being married to an older man. And then you have the thing where Ramona called up Jill and then was going off about how Luanne was a slut, but Luanne was on speaker, you know, all that stuff. I mean, I can go on. I can go on. And I am going on. The point is this. There's too much bad blood. They will never be friends ever. Which makes for great TV. And I just, I love that Luanne thought the appropriate place to address the elephant in the room was during one of Sonya's cocktail parties at her townhouse, which is attached to a parking garage. Very glamorous, very glamorous, which I'm sure she doesn't even own anymore because she had to sell it to, you know, pay her debts, which are around what, like $17 million. Good luck with that. Somewhere in that area. Yeah. I mean, I love that, you know, seeing Ramona and Luanne go at it for the first time in the season. It felt great. It felt like watching old rivals, you know, like watching the Yankees and the Red Sox go at it, you know. Oh, I was going to say, I was going to say MTV Real World Road rules the challenge because that's how excited I get. But the cherry on top was Ramona's eye makeup. Did you see that? Oh, yeah, it was like blue, right? She had like pink lipstick shed. She looked like a gem in the holograms doll, like that got her head dunked in a, like, a vat of neon. It was crazy. She, I mean, she, Ramona always out does herself every year. I'm only sad that in any of her professionals, she doesn't have big, crazy hair like she did last season. Remember last season, she had like that 1980s thing going on with her. I know, she had a big, it was out of control. It was amazing. Well, speaking of the other party, I definitely do, you know, Sony's party was a little lackluster because the girls didn't get too into it. It's really where they were just introducing the new characters. But the second party of the evening, which was a dinner party that Ramona and Mario were hosting in the Hamptons, is where I thought more interesting stuff definitely happened. Well, so. This episode is brought to you by Huggy's Little Movers. Huggy's knows that babies come in all shapes and sizes, and they're tushies due to. Huggy's has more curves and outstanding active fit. Parents know that there's nothing worse than an ill-fitting diaper, especially for active wiggly babies. Huggy's Little Movers are curved to fit all curves, so babies feel comfy no matter how much they're moving around. And we all know, they're moving around a lot. They also offer 12-hour protection against leaks, which is a game changer. Get your baby's butt into the best fitting diaper. Huggy's Little Movers. We got you baby. Team Mobile 5G Internet keeps getting better. Boost your connection to harder to reach places with Home Internet Plus, and get Internet right where you want it. With Wi-Fi that reaches the attic, I finally have a home office. Get a free upgrade to Team Mobile Home Internet Plus, while supplies last. Home Internet Plus starts at $50 a month without a pay in any voice line. Check availability@teamable.com/home-internet. During congestion, customers on this plane may notice speeds lower than other customers and further reductions using greater than 1.2 terabytes per month due to data prioritization. After $20 bill credit, let's $5 per month without auto pay. For me, not the pinnacle. The best part about that dinner party, there are a few moments, was Heather, Mario, and Ramona getting into it. So the background on that was that Heather, much like me, interrupts people a lot. Wait, what did the AV club say that you did to me? I think I steamrolled you. You steamrolled and trampled me. Note that you actually just interrupted me to make that happen. I'm taking back the night. He's getting on to his own steamroller, okay? It's only cause Ronnie's not here. We are going to steamroll each other, which sounds very inappropriate, but I think it's probably benign to say that. So off topic. No, but here's the thing. So they're talking, Heather is interrupting a lot, and she's also talking over people, and you don't get the sense that she's really listening. And Mario getting fed up makes a snide little comment, as he often does, about how she's cut them off three times. And then Ramona turns to Heather and says, "Yeah, you do do that, by the way." What says that to a guest in their own home who is not a good friend? And so then Heather though, Heather responds and was like, "Oh, well, you know, I was doing it because it's funny because I know that you do that to me also." Well, here's the thing. I think that Heather said that just because she was pissed, and that's how she, you know, kind of was it right there. She didn't, I mean, she didn't really, I don't believe that she saw Ramona in that light, but as soon as Ramona, you know, kind of attacked her end was double teaming her with Mario. Let's be honest. I like that she tossed it back at Ramona. Fuck you. What was great was that what ensued then was one of the great passive aggressive fights of all time. The three of these people, this is like, by the way, as much as these people are not wasks, this was a very waspy moment. The three of them engaged in a very vicious attack on each other, but with smiles on their face and like chuckling the entire time. Uh huh, and hair flips and cocktail. It was absolutely amazing. Like this is like a masterclass on how to be a wasp. It was like Christmas at my fucking house. It was amazing. I felt like I was at the Whitfield because honestly, there was, if I seem to remember, like they, you know, Heather said, well, you know, you talk a lot and then, and then, and then they said something. Well, I guess I'm, you know, I guess you're a fast person, you know, you know, you're very fast and I'm a New Yorker. I've got a lot of things to say. They start to like veil it all in these weird euphemisms and everything and they're laughing. But I'm like, these women are attacking each other with knives right now. It's amazing. And then as usual, Ramona makes up some excuse and it's like, oh, I have to go check on the meatballs and like runs out the door when a Viva walks over. It's like Ramona is really looking for the escape route. A lot already and just one in one episode and normally she's a bulldog and she stands her ground. I don't know what's going to happen. Yeah. Well, but you know what the Ramona, you know, I would have left also because it was an increasingly tense situation and who wants to stand that, you know, they sort of said there are pieces. So now let's get back to Heather here because you mentioned something before about how, you know, when Ramona came out her, Heather went right back at it. I feel like Heather is a little bit of a princess and now hear it out. Let me speak this out. I think if you noticed whenever she got one up, whenever she felt, whenever she perceived that she was being attacked or whatever, she, you know, it ruffled her feathers as it would anyone. But she really, really made her mad and then she would go on a little campaign behind the behind basically Ramona's back and would basically smear her to death, you know. But look Ben, you know this, I mean this show and this franchise, it's all about having allies and yes, allies can switch from episode to episode, they can switch from season to season, but you know, with a new crop of cast members in there. I mean, you got, you can say the same thing about Luanne when she had, you know, a decaf cappuccino in the last few seconds of the episode with the ladies where she just really wanted to talk shit about Ramona and then, and then hit the pavement. I think what I guess with Heather, the reason why it irks me a little bit more because the truth is they all do this, but she is really super sweet and smiley to them, you know, she's really, she's, she goes above and beyond in the fake department, I think. And I think that's where it really rubs me the wrong way because I actually just think that she's kind of like smiley and giggly and laughing and maybe not the most brilliant person so like it doesn't rub me, you know, necessarily, you know, the wrong way yet. It very well couldn't in a few episodes or minutes, but for the record. For the record, by the way, your listeners for the record, I was on Team Gorga before Matt was, and I was on team and team non Cindy bar shop before Matt was. You were also on Team Catway before me too. Yes, so I'm anticipating that Matt will see the light and start to. Okay, you'll, I'll see the light and start to hate Heather and you'll see the light and start to realize that Carol is the secret weapon. I, you know, I'm open to Carol. I am, I will, I will be open to Carol if you will be open to hating Heather. You know what, there is nothing I enjoy more than saying, yes, I'm going to be willing to hate somebody in a few weeks. So like I can, I can commit to that fully. I like this negotiation. That's good. That works. But there were a few other highlights that we probably. Sorry, I have to harp on Heather for one more thing. We touched on a little bit, but how, I mean, can we talk about the fact that she's at Sonya's party? And then she just says, well, you know, my dad just died like five days ago. And. Yeah, why was he doing that? She was like, I don't crazy, right? Crazy. And then, and then I love that it cuts to Miss Manner's part to Luan in a confessional going like, honey, you just don't do that at a cocktail party. Yeah, exactly. And, and you, but here's the thing, normally Luan is crazy and her manners book, which I own and his autograph is completely ludicrous. Luan made it on the head right there. I mean, you don't talk about a dead dad like two days later at a cocktail party. And especially not in such a perky way. I mean, like, at least show like some sadness or bring it up in a way that's a little, makes a little bit more sense, you know. Yeah, it just didn't feel so right. But I do think that she's kind of like mugging for the camera. I mean, again, if you get lost in the shuffle, Cindy bar shop, you're not going to last another season. And these women, all they want is to get another check from Bravo and another contract that says you are welcome back for the following year. So look, she has to talk about the dead dad. She has to talk about the liver disease for baby. She has to talk shift behind her. Mone is back. Guess what? Now she's in and we can't lose her. Yeah. Now, so in terms of the other things, the episode, I cut you off before when you were trying to transition to something else. So what was the thing you were going to talk about? Which there was just there's so many. I mean, where do you want to start? Do you want to talk about? I want to talk about Sonya for a second because here's the thing, like I just the other like highlight for me and by highlight, I mean, terrible moment for the women involved was during Ramona's dinner party where her Sony was talking about her ex husband. But, you know, sometimes she still refers to him as her husband and Ramona cut her off. And in my opinion, embarrassed her in front of the entire dinner table, not that the rest of those people are not holding on. Including a date, including a date, a potential date, who by the way, I thought was very cute and he played tennis, which I'm obsessed with. So Sonya should have gotten on that. Matt, you have to start going to Ramona's house for dinner parties. Apparently, I do, even though I know I would, you know, she would murder me in two minutes. But anyway, I just think that like, you know, and we did see this in the season preview, which we'll get to in full detail in a second here, but I do think that Sonya and Ramona are going to start to butt heads this season. I think this was just the beginning and I just think that Ramona is rude. Yeah, Ramona is, we didn't see enough of like the fun Ramona. We saw more of just like the evil Ramona, but you know, she's been the evil Ramona for a long time. I mean, remember season one, when she made her first splash. I mean, remember that first dinner party, the first, you know, like at Jill's Aaron's house. I mean, Ramona, she's a force to be reckoned with, you know. But Ben, it's been a while since we've had turtle time. Like, it's been like a tack dog for quite some time. Well, I think we're going to get some turtle time. And I have to say, actually, Sonya, I was, I was enjoying Sonya. I felt like this is like a little bit of a return to form for her because last season, she became kind of bitchy and awful. And I thought she was bitchy and awful and she got way too much into this burlesque crap. I mean, I'm still glad, and you must agree with me here, that you're still glad to see that she is cooking up a storm in the toaster oven. Yeah. And by the way, at this very nice dinner party, do you happen to notice that they were serving pigs in a blanket? Oh, yeah. It was really classy. I was like, wait a second. At the same time, though, it really made me want to have some pigs in a blanket. And a funny story, I actually have some frozen ones in my freezer, but I haven't cooked them in because I feel like to do that is sad. If you made veggie ones, I would partake. Oh, my God. What do you think about this? We have to talk Hamptons for one quick second here. So what do you think about the fact that, like, Ramona's house is gorgeous and is big bucks. Luann has a glamorous house in the Hamptons as well. I found it very funny that every time somebody arrived at the party, they were like, Oh, I rent a house, but I rent it for nine months out of the year. Oh, I don't want to dive into that pooler. Oh, yeah, I'm from upstate New York. I would never, like, buy a house in the Hamptons. I'm a mountain girl. Like, another, another, by the way, another heatherism that. Another head from the brochures. And by the way, and that was also, that was before, by the way, that comment was before she got called out about interrupting when she made a dig about Ramona tomorrow about upstate New York, you know, she's, well, I know Ramona doesn't think there's anything up there, but there really is. You got to settle down there. Again, she's trying to make a good first impression, not necessarily with them, but with viewers. And I do think that that happened. But a few other highlights, we must talk about Victoria, Luann's daughter, shed an art show out of Luann's garage, and she was charging hundreds and thousands of dollars for her artwork, which featured pretty much robotic naked lady dead skull things. You know, I didn't think her art was that bad. I thought her art was actually pretty good. I thought it was fantastic. And I actually liked a few of the pieces. And I had, I've been there, I would have spent $300 on a piece in a heartbeat just because she came from the blood of Countess Luann. Yeah, exactly. However, were you not disturbed slightly by some of the subject matter? No, I thought, I thought it was great that it was dark. Do you think it's, do you think it's because she comes from a dark place, a dark broken home? Well, yeah, I would say so. I was more fascinated by Victoria. Like, she sort of changed over the years. She sort of become a little more, I don't know. I don't know the polite way to say this because she was underage, but she's, you know, she was perhaps more feminine in her youth. She's a little sturdy now. She's kind of, she's a little book now, which is fine. I don't think that she's, I don't think she's a lesbian by any means, but she does love a, I think that, you know, her style used to be strictly a question chic. And now I think she's moving into a goth phase now, which I'm excited for fashion wise. I'm excited for it too, but you know, I have to say, I was kind of, I was really excited to see her develop into a wonderful new, like, waspy debutante. And to see her that now she's going in the artistic route, which is probably a better path for her. I had Sam disappointed because I really wanted to see her, you know, going to, I was hoping that she'd go off to Chote and from Chote to Yale. I was going to say the following her, like, you know, it's going to be amazing because I'm dying to see where she ends up going. She'll probably go to like Sarah Lawrence at this point, you know, all that. Then it will be full on Birkenstocks. Wait, actually, you know, who goes to Sarah Lawrence? Is Jill's Aaron's daughter? Doesn't she go to Sarah Lawrence? Oh, well then, I'd show up there because Jill won't not be having it. No, oh, well, no, no, no, Jill in the way, I'm just fine, right? Well, I just don't think that Jill will have anything to do with Luan now that Luan's on the show and Jill is off. That's, well, no, I think that Jill will actually try to, I just always tried to sort of like ride Luan's coattails a little bit. I'd say although she would probably say it's the other way around. Yeah, I mean, because she owns Zaren Fabrax. Yeah, well, and, oh, here's another thing, Jill must be livid that her Spanx collection, whatever it's called. It's not getting airtime. We totally have to talk about this because yummy thing is getting airtime. How many, okay, look, we know that Bethany Frankel does the cocktails and, you know, then Ramona did the Ramona Pinagrigio. Like, that's just never going to stop. We're only going to see more and more nasty-ass drinks come out of these ladies. Bethany has shapewear, Jill's Zaren has shapewear, and Heather has shapewear. Like, does this mean that Heather has the best shapewear now, or is she just going to get the most screen time for it? Well, I will say this. Heather's credit, when she had, like, her little staff meeting, she's the first, I think, housewife of all these women. Perhaps Candy Bursts excluded, although she, never mind. You mean owner of department store tags? Yes, she's the first one who seems to have, like, a legitimate staff. Like, she doesn't just have, like, one or two people, and they sit, like, in a couch or they go to a coffee shop. She has, like, a staff. She has, like, an office. Speaking of another slam that she delivered when she was talking to Ramona, she was like, "Yeah, well, I actually like to come into my office and, like, interact with my employees. Like, I don't like to just work from home all the time. Like, clearly, that's what you do." Yeah, and then she slammed the learning annex. I'm like, "Heather, be careful, because next year you're going to be on the cover of that thing." I was just going to say, yeah, if you don't play your cards right, you are going to be doing a weekly seminar. Oh, yeah. But look, you know, look, she's, I think she was the breakout of the three of them, because look how much we were talking about her, you know? Aviva, I did like Aviva, though, and I have to say, I liken the previews for the season. Some of the things that Aviva says, particularly in the last-- Okay, well, let's talk. I mean, before we get to Jersey, we have to talk. I mean, our favorite thing is always, like, and coming up this season on the housewives. I mean, there is, like, they tease us so much with, like, 19 amazing things that are going to happen. So tell me a few of yours will address a few of mine, and then we'll move on. Well, I just really like when Aviva looks at the girls and goes, "You're both white trash, quite frankly." I love that. That's the best thing ever. We just need to talk about that for a second, because they showed that, like, weeks ago in the first previews, and I immediately was like, "Oh, shit, I love this lady." Yeah, and I also love when Ramona goes, "Calm down!" It's like she's channeling her inner Oprah. Yeah, exactly. There's so many great things. I love that, like, I think they all are fighting with each other. I think the only one who's not fighting is Carol, who's probably off running about the Kardashians somewhere. Okay, that is the problem with Carol. I don't care to read her interview with Glamour and the Kardashians. But, however, I was kind of surprised to see that, you know, after this premiere, it seemed like Aviva and Heather were going to be allies BFFs for the season, but clearly that's not the case. And it seems like Heather's going to be the one standing on the outside alone by the mid part of the season. You know what, it's so hard to tell. You can never tell. And the thing is, the previews never really indicate the gravity of the fights. I remember Kelly Ben-Smone's first season, and, you know, they would show the clip coming up the season of her saying, "Bethany, like, I'm here, you're here." And you'd think, "Oh, it's just like a whatever." And it was the biggest thing ever. It was the biggest thing. So that's going to be fun is gauging the severity of these fights. You also don't know, like, half of those moments could be in the next episode. You never know. Well, one of them that will, for sure, be in the next episode is Luann confronting Ramona. Oh, they're little beating in the park? They're meeting in the park. It's like very Ingrid Bergman, like, you know, on a park bench, you know, very poetic. So the big story was that, I guess, a girl at, is it Noel's birthday party? A girl passed out of the bushes at the LaSepza State, and she was wasted, and they had to call an ambulance and get rid of her. And she was only 15, well, Noel was turning 15, so clearly the girl's significantly underage. And Luann's like, "And she must have been drinking beforehand or snuck booze in." I'm like, "Yeah, right. You know you were serving cocktails, Luann." God bless you. God bless you. I would just say it any good. She would probably, her defense in court would probably be like, "Well, any good party has fabulous catering in an open bar." She was probably singing. She probably had her, like, drag queen head dress on like that time at Jill Zaren's birthday party. And she's probably singing songs to all the kids, serving them champagne, you know, pretending they're in Paris. So, I guess that this girl passed out, and then Luann tells the story. And you could tell Luann was mad because she, her face, was angry. Then she got like the creepy trembles, and Luann doesn't get the creepy trembles. Yeah, she does not. And so I guess, apparently, Ramona called up Luann and said, "Stop trying to make me apologize." 'Cause if you do, I'm not afraid to go there 'cause I know things about your kids or something like that. Yeah, but okay. I think that what that, I mean, that wasn't just about like, "Hey, clearly, you're a bad mom." And you throw parties where there's underage drinking and children are like dying in your bushes. I think that she was also hinting at a few other things that she probably does know about Noel and Victoria through her Hampton spies, which no doubt she has because she has all the money in the world and she can afford them. But like, I do want to say, maybe less than a year ago, there was stuff in the news about Victoria making racial comments about her using marijuana. So like, that's, you know, die-hard viewers and listeners of our podcast know that Victoria, you know, maybe does have a little bit of a, you know, salacious path. Listen, it does not take a genius to figure out that perhaps that Victoria and perhaps Noel, who was neglected since he was a child on Taco Night, as we remember. Yes. They are kids who come from wealthy parents who had a very public divorce. It does not take a genius to realize that perhaps they might have some dark phases coming up for them, you know? No, it's fantastic. That's why this artwork and the art show was fantastic. And that's also why, like, I'm not surprised that Ramona has dirt on them, but let me ask you this. You know, it's something that we see every time during the reunions for any one of the franchises for Housewives, and the women get very, very, very upset when you start talking about the kids. I'll give you an example. Recently, Shirei kind of was talking smack about Nini's son shoplifting, and Nini was about to stomp her fucking head in. So like, where do you think that there's a line drawn, a line not drawn? In my opinion, again, I don't have kids yet, so I'm standing over here on the sidelines and I'm saying, look, you're dumb enough to put your child on the show, all fair game, but, you know, what's your take? I think that still, even if someone else is dumb enough to put their kid on the show, you should probably go the moral high ground and not make fun of the kids. Although, this is coming from me who was just saying, it's insane to make some things about Victoria and Noelle. But the truth is this, you know, whenever we talk about the kids, I generally try to keep it maybe critical, but respectful, you know. I think that these women, some of them do go in for the kill and make judgmental, make some very judgmental things, but then again, so do I. So, but I'm not on the show, though, and there, you know, and see, I feel like as bloggers or podcasters, I think the kids are, to a certain degree fair game, because these women are putting their kids out there and their parenting skills out there, so I think it's fair game for us to talk about it and be like, I don't like whatever she's doing with ever, with the understanding that these women are sort of being portrayed in a certain way, they're kind of like characters to us, they're not real people, but for their other cast members who know them as real people and who have the power to affect what we kind of see, I think it's probably best to put a muzzle on it. No, I totally hear you. I mean, I love the fact that, you know, crazy Ramona's already making threats, which are making Luan just jump off a bridge almost here, and, you know, because of the kids, I just, you know, the shows would not be as powerful as they are. I'm talking about them like their Pulitzer Prize winning or like Emmy winning shows, but they wouldn't be as powerful if the kids were not a part of the equation here, and at this point, Bravo kind of is making sure that if you do come on the show, we get access to your kids, your significant other, your pets, your maids, it's the whole, it's the whole shebang, because to be honest with you, like, I don't like that we don't see Sonya's daughter. Yeah, I think that's weird because it actually, it sort of colors your perception of the people in certain ways, you know? Right, and the goal of this show as a viewer is for us to sit back and judge them and look at rich people and watch them fall and watch them fuck off, and that's what we want to do. We want to judge the person, not the person without their child, so we want to judge them as terrible parents. Yeah, I can only judge, you know, Sonya as a dummy who puts her, you know, fists her blackberry up a toilet and takes off her clothes and sleeps with strange men and cooks out of a toaster oven. That's a fixation with a toaster oven. And by the way, I still am waiting for her novel about, what was she, what was she writing a novel about something a mysterious lover, like a woman having a mysterious lover or something? She was doing a whole hell of a lot of things, which I don't think came to fruition, because now she missed out on the shit's grey boat, I'll tell you that much. Clearly, but as we saw in the season preview, I think that her only real goal this year is to sue the shit out of her ex-husband and take all of his money so that she can keep her house and keep her lifestyle. Good for her. Well, speaking of kids and good portrayals, et cetera, et cetera, why don't we use that this moment to transition to New Jersey, because really of all the housewives, family and children play the strongest role in this one. And I thought this episode, this week's episode, this super gay episode, was actually had a lot of very sweet moments, actually. Yeah, it totally did. I mean, we do have to say here that, look, just because New York is starting and it is our secret love child and we are obsessed with it, Jersey is not that far into the season. I mean, we still have a hell of a way to go with Jersey, and you know there's still a ton of fireworks, so we're still obsessed with that as well. And last night, the episode didn't have too much going on besides all the gay stuff, which we'll get into in a second, but it was kind of a more muted, nicer, quieter, family-oriented episode. And I enjoyed that. I was totally enthralled, even though it wasn't like Cat Fight Central. Exactly. Well, because you know what, though, they've got a great balance of characters on there right now. And I think honestly, the emotional centerpiece of the show was Rosie talking about like coming out of the closet and telling that to Victoria, right? That's her name, Victoria, and Joseph, her niece and nephew. It was really honestly, it was a very sweet and moving moment. It really was. It definitely was. I mean, she was talking about how her father, who's now deceased, was very concerned for Rosie being one of his daughters, you know, that she wasn't going to get married and perhaps that had connotations of being taken care of as an adult. And, you know, I just thought it was like a really touching moment. I know that we talk a lot of shit on this podcast and we are total bitches. And I just really thought that last night's Jersey's Jersey episode was totally sweet. I love Kathy. I love Rich. I love that he would never think anything about, you know, not letting his kids spend more time with Rosie. He just thought that it was like a great thing for her to be honest and it really only made all of them closer to be honest. I mean, I think the way Kathy got so emotional talking about Rosie, the way she talked about the pain that Rosie must have gone through, etc. It was honestly very moving. And I watched with a friend and she was tearing up quite a bit. As she showed, I mean, Kathy loves her sister Rosie and I just, I really like the relationship. Kathy is so the best on all these shows. She's the best mom. She's probably the best mom on reality TV. I might give you that. I might give you that. But I will say that, like, you know, I'm totally rooting for Rosie. I'm glad that she's a part of the show. I know that Andy Cohen likes her and that she'll continue to be part of the show. Let me ask you this. Could a single lesbian ever be a permanent cast member and elevated to housewife status? I think theoretically, yes, but we have yet to find the one. You know, they did try on OC last season to have that lesbian. Don't get me started with that, Jim. Fernanda. Fernanda. But, you know, here's the thing. This is going to sound really stereotypical. Would you not love to see Rosie going on dates? I would love to. But here's the thing. I think they want women to be somewhat glamorous and unfortunately, Rosie sort of lacks in that department. But she's great. And I love, I love the way she interacts with people. I love the way she talks to people. I thought it was really funny when she was in the hot tub and Cliff Robinson's wife was hitting on her and that was very strange. I love Rosie. I love the gorgas. I love the Wakeles. The Wakeles. They're all like, I feel like they're just good, fun people, you know. I could never imagine. What do we want to hang out with the gorgas? Don't you? Don't you want to go to like a party with them? I would love to. Although I have to say, I cannot imagine for my life my parents ever doing any of the things that were going on in that hot tub, you know. Then little do you know. I know exactly. And I don't, I really don't want to think about that. And I feel bad for these kids who have to see their parents do all this stuff in a hot tub. What about Joe Gorga flashing his junk while he was changing him to street right in front of the camera? What was that about? He must be very proud. He's, you know, because he knows he's a good looking guy and that people like him and, you know, whatever. I say more power to him. Right now he is in a, he can almost do no wrong. He can do wrong. He can do wrong, but he can almost do no wrong. Yeah, he and Melissa are like a perfect spot right now, but let's transfer it to the other side. Then we got Theresa and, and Joe Judas. And so the, the other part of the story was that Caroline's gay brother was getting gay married and in their like fairytale house in Chicago. And this guy invited, you know, the manzos obviously. And then he also invited Theresa and Joe. And first of all, before we get to Theresa and Joe, Dina was invited and did not go because there's this feud with Caroline. And what we got the, we finally got some insight into it, which is that Theresa allegedly told Dina that Caroline was going, said that she was going to undermine any opportunity that came Dina's way. And so now they have a big feud. Well, here's the crazy thing. Like when I watched the show earlier on, you know, when Dina was a full time cast member, I kind of liked Dina and I kind of thought that she was reasonable. But if she is truly siding with Theresa over Caroline, she's completely nuts too. Yeah, that's exactly why would she believe Theresa about all this. Like, and also, I have to say I was a little offended that like not all of Caroline's siblings came to this wedding. Okay, look, there are 11 siblings Caroline was there, her brother Chris who is Jacqueline's husband was there and the gay brother who was getting married. The others were not there. Apparently, the wedding was thrown together kind of, you know, last minute, but I don't think that matters. But, you know, you do what you got to do for family, but I sound like a person from Jersey. What is going on, but don't you think it was kind of weird. I mean, do you think it has something to do with the fact that they don't, they're not down with the homos or what was the deal. I've been, it could have been that. I mean, it was, it does sound like it was thrown together quickly, probably at the behest of the producers, but, right, because they were like working for it so you might need to have it next week while we're still shooting. Yeah, and quite frankly, I just, I do believe that like you can't talk about how close your family is, whatever. I don't care if that there's 11 siblings, whatever a wedding as a wedding. And if it's your sibling, you show up only three of them were there and the mom. I just thought it was completely bizarre. But do you, do you think that there's any, I mean, we'll never know this, but do you think there's any chance that people are not fond, you know, some of the siblings are not fond of Caroline or maybe she's becoming a bit of a diva now that she's a TV star? Because I think that that part of it. Or maybe they're not, maybe they're not comfortable being on camera too. And some of them might even be Team Dina. You never know. Exactly. Well, anyway, so we're rapidly running out of time. So let's go on to Teresa and Joe. And so, you know, Teresa, well, I mean, she's just awful in general, but the big signature moment for them, I think, was that on the bus, they were on a shuttle or a party bus back from the rehearsal dinner back to the hotel. Joe Judas, of course, is drunk. And finally, I think this is the first time I think someone's finally mentioned that he may have a drinking problem. Caroline in her confessional says that he has a drinking problem, which, or she goes, he may have a drinking problem. She said he's a shell of a man who she met four years ago. And he seems very troubled, very dark, and he probably has a drinking problem, which I kind of liked that Caroline went there because it's about time somebody said it. Yeah, I liked it. No, I have to say, I'm loving the season watching the decline of this friendship. I think it's totally fascinating knowing where it's where it's going to be and watching it erode has been great. And so then, and Joe Judas makes some ridiculous comment to Greg, the resident gay, about how he probably has the loosest asshole of them all. Actually, I would think that Joe Judas has the loosest asshole because I think he spent the most time in jail out of everyone here. So he's probably taking it up the ass. But according to Jacqueline, he's above the law, which he clearly is. And then, you know, actually, Caroline had actually a great, oh, Caroline was a Kathy, had a great, I think it was Kathy, had a great confessional. I forget what she said, but she had, like, amazing comic time where she said, like, she prolonged this thing where she was like, zip, none. Do you remember what that was for? That was an amazing moment. It was Kathy. It was Kathy, and they let that camera hang on her. It hung so long, and it was fantastic. So I just want to give kudos to Kathy for once again doing a great job and being the best person of all time. Okay, well, let's talk about, I mean, so next week, we didn't actually see the wedding. It was all lead up. It was more like rehearsal dinner. So next week, we're actually going to see the wedding, and apparently, like, you can already tell Caroline is seething, you know, because Theresa is there at this family thing. She can't, she cannot handle it. So I think next week, like, Theresa makes a comment about Caroline's hat, which does look hideous. And that maybe sets Caroline off or something. I just have to say this, look, I hate Theresa with all of my being, and her husband Joe is the nastiest person ever on reality TV. But do you not think at this point that Caroline is like, Caroline is, I'm worried, is not going to make as good of TV as she used to, because she's kind of just, like, pissed, and I need her to fight with Theresa. Otherwise, she's getting there. She's getting there. But don't you think she's just like, she's like getting to be like an old lady who's just like complaining about everything? You know, Theresa, the way Theresa operates is terrible the way she wants to sweep everything under the rug and have positivity and love and just move forward. But Caroline is harping on some old shit, and I feel like Caroline does need to get over a few things. Well, here's the thing, we always suspected this, that what Caroline's really mad is about what happened to Punta Kana that was never shown on TV, and that would honestly be enough to make you that mad. And quite frankly, as we saw in season one, you push Caroline enough, she eventually snaps. Must I remind you of her famous, let me tell you with something about my family, okay? So Caroline, she will get there. Just wait, just wait, just, you know, she's like an old lawn mower, we're just revving her up, but soon she'll be cutting back her ass down. She did say that she is a ticking time bomb. She didn't even say, the phrase is ticking time bomb, but she only said ticking bomb, it kind of annoyed me. But anyway, she's a ticking bomb. She's a bomb. Let me ask you this, Jacqueline, does she need to be there? A lot of people don't like Jacqueline and don't think that she brings anything to the story. I still love her, I just miss, however, that Ashley is not living under her roof because that's where the good juice is. Yeah, Jacqueline is pretty useless, although she's had some funny comments this season, so she somehow, like, endeared herself to me a little bit. Hey, she hosted Field Day, so you got to give her some credit there. She did, and she is capable of being super passive when she needs to be, so I'm okay. And she, of course, she has to be there because she gets into such a fight with Teresa that she doesn't show up at the reunion, so. So true, so we have more of her. Okay. Do we have anything else on Jersey, or can we do it real quick? Okay. No, I have a few more things to talk about. Okay, go. Number one. Yes. Kim D's breasts when she sat down with Teresa, go. Oh, my God. It was like two greasy tangerines. Okay. Coming out of her armpits. Coming out of her armpits. She's just not pleasant to look at, although I will say thank goodness for her, for sort of telling Teresa that she should go to therapy with her. And by the way, here, another example of why Teresa's awful. This guy, this poor guy, reaches out to her, says we should do therapy together, and she pretty much is like saying no. She is awful. She's an awful woman. Don't you like how she also called it physical therapy? Yeah. Two some moments last night. She called it physical therapy, and then she also didn't know the word for trunk as in tree trunk. Yeah, that was. She's a genius. She's a genius, reminding me of that, because when I saw that, I was like, I have to make a mental note to bring this up on, on Watch For Crapins, and I would have forgotten had it not been for you, Matt, with Fields. Okay, last topic, because it's always our favorite topic when talking about Jersey before we move on for two seconds about OC, Melania, the Tasmanian devil. She's out of control. I mean, she's a disaster. She is a nightmare at that girl. She will. She will be in jail with her father. They will have a little, a little crime ring together, perhaps. Now, that is a reality show that I would watch. Yeah. She is a nightmare, and she will, was she, was she the one eating the makeup, or is that the Audrey? I almost called it Audrey. Audrey Anna. Yeah, Audrey. A Patrick came in, but I don't want to make a joke. Audrey, a Patrick is free to eat makeup. Yeah, her schedule is kind of open. Okay, we have gone very long, but we do need to talk about OC really quickly, and then we will wrap things up. OC, to me, is kind of been sucking this season, and now with New York in the mix, and Jersey is still on fire. Like, I kind of don't care. However, the ladies did end up in Costa Rica, and fireworks were started. Well, first of all, I think OC has been all right. I think it's been better than last season. Second of all, it is kind of, you know, I think it was funny that Alexis Bellino only went down there for two days. I mean, if you're going to travel all the way down to Costa Rica, which, as we all know, is in Mexico, you might as well make a whole week of it, by the way. Jesus doesn't let her out of her chains for more than 48 hours. So, did you notice? So, she made a whole big stink, by the way, when they were ziplining. She was acting like she was a ziplining pro, and then when I finally came time for a zipline, she was scared to hell. But then when she finally did it, I don't know if you noticed it. She was like maybe there were like five feet above the ground. It was like a very shallow zipline. Did you see that? Yeah, most ziplines are like in treetops, like hundreds of feet in the air and are absolutely scary. There's no way they were more than like 10 feet off the ground. Yeah, I mean, the later ones looked like they were much higher, but that first one, they were like, it was like me ziplining like over my couch, okay? It was like as benign as could be, you know? Which we should try next week. We will do that. I'll be on a podcast. So anyway, though, the real story here was that they all ganged up on Alexis at dinner, and I loved it. Well, you know, Alexis is like a great, you know, she's a moron, but here's the problem. Like, I don't like people punching on her because she can't defend herself. Like, you know, we've seen so many fights in the housewives history, but at least they're like fair fights. This is not a fair fight. Yeah, but I think, you know, what those what she has in her corner is Jesus and righteousness. So it kind of is a fair fight because that's true because Jesus Trump's all and by Jesus, I mean her husband Jim. Yeah, exactly. She's got so much righteousness that I'm kind of down with them all all gang up on her. You know, but you know, I will have to say though, she made. She only made one salient point, but I had to agree with it was when she turned to Tamara. I was like, why do you have to be so mean? And you know what? She's right. Tamara does not. Tamara is a mean witch. She really is. They are so mean to this girl. I don't know why Eddie is with Tamara. I mean, Eddie clearly wants to be on TV maybe because he thinks he's a model actor, but like Tamara is pure evil. Pure evil, but I do love the way that that Heather tried to sort of like get, you know, Heather's tried to be all sophisticated. Was more than happy to get the ball rolling on this confrontation with Alexis. And you know what? I thought it was I thought it was great because you know what? Alexis did need to be called out because they do have a Rolls Royce, a Phantom of this or that. I mean, they're just ridiculous. Well, and then the car changes like every two weeks. They move houses constantly. I mean, it does not make sense and clearly Fox five is not paying her a ton for her. Emmy worthy segments. So, I mean, she's totally pretentious. There's no doubt about that Peggy was getting really into the good stuff. You know, at the end of last season with that. And now Peggy's gone. So we're not going to see all of that. But look, here's a thing like the only thing that like I'm kind of concerned about. And I love that I have serious concern here is that if Gretchen wants to bash Alexis, that might be a problem because it makes me believe that she's falling under the brainwashing of Tamara. And I do not want. I do not want Gretchen to be. No, I know Gretchen was not bashing, but I know that her relationship with Alexis is now strained, which makes sense because Alexis is a moron. But I don't want it to be the Gretchen and Tamara. I don't want them to become BFF. I cannot stand the thought of that. Yeah, that's not it's definitely not the best. But on the plus side, now you might get the Vicki and Alexis show, which is kind of salvo. I don't know about that. All I want to see is all I watch OC for anymore now is to watch Brianna tell her mom how stupid and awful she is and that she's with the wrong man. Yeah, well, that's that's almost good enough. Almost. Almost. Look, I think that the I imagine the OC season is about to wrap up right because they're on their big vacation. So we're probably about five more episodes, I'd say. Yeah, okay. All right. So there's still there's still plenty of time. Do not worry. Do not worry listeners. We still have a lot to handle. And, you know, we're going to get more craziness from Costa Rica tomorrow night on the show, which we will talk about next week. But do you have any other main points before we kind of wrap this up? Yeah, you know, I don't have any other main points about OC. I mean, it's just, you know, it's Alexis, she's an idiot. That's what it always comes down to. It always comes down to that. Well, let me ask you this, Tardy for the party just had huge rating or not Tardy for the party. Oh, we have to talk about this. I'm sorry. We have to talk about. Okay, I'm glad I brought it up because I'm still watching this and it's actually fantastic. And the ratings are through the roof. The ratings for Kim's spinoff. Don't be Tardy for the wedding are actually better some this week than some of the OC housewives original broadcasts. Yeah, that baffles me because contrary to you, I think the show is a piece of shit. And that's, but that may also be-- Oh, it is. It is a piece of shit, but I like him. I don't love shows about people getting married and their process, but whatever. We're not going to talk about that. We've talked about that aspect of the show many times. We're going to talk about her hair and the wig coming off. You know, Kathy Griffin mentioned this on her show, which followed immediately afterwards, which is that you kind of expected it to be like a bald, fitting hair, ogre head or something. No, you expected her to look like Dr. Kimberly Sean Mancini on Melrose Place when the lightning struck and Marcia Cross ripped off her wig and she had scars in a demented face. That's what we were promised. Yeah, but instead she actually had perfectly lovely hair and then it actually made me mad. Like, why are you wearing these stupid ass wigs that look are so big and make you look like an idiot and you have this really nice hair? I mean, admittedly her hair cut was a little conservative. It looks sort of like Texas to me, but, you know, she has nice hair. She does not need a wig. I think it looks better than any of her wigs. Listen, you might think that I'm a horrible person, which I kind of am. I am not for like the fillers and the Botox. I am so pro hair extension. You have no idea. I thought her real hair was so flat and so Texas and that she needs massive wiggery. Well, she can, but here's the thing. Fine. Add extensions. I don't care about that, but a wig has a heavy look to it. It looks, you can see a wig and I don't think it's a nice look. Then it goes with her big diamonds, her big boobs, and her big ball of lifestyle. She looked so much more sophisticated with her normal hair. She really did. She can do something like that. She looked like a real, I mean, I was supposed to look like a real old housewife. But that's only because the way I was styled. If she grew out her hair properly in a more youthful haircut, she would look fantastic. I think her hair, she looks better with flat hair than big, wavy volume for sure. Some volume. We'll agree to disagree on this. What do you think about the funny, like, little Ariana Briel segments that they toss in with them like cooking or being silly? I just, I like those girls. I like her kids. Well, I like Ariana. I always say that she's a little angel and she's going to be ruined by this entire reality show process. Brielle is already a lost cause. Yeah, that's probably true. We have to wrap this up though. As much as I'd love to start bashing some more kids. Okay. Well, the good news is we have a lot of New York coming at us. The entire season five is still under wraps, but we just saw the premiere. It was fantastic. Still more Jersey. Still a few more OC episodes, which means we're getting close to that reunion. In this summer, we are going to have the return of flipping out and we're also going to have million dollar listing LA, which I'm secretly obsessed with team Madison Hildebrand. And you know what? Next episode, we didn't talk about this one, but you know what? Next episode, why don't we talk about the new summer by Bravo commercial? Let's pin that for next week. Let's totally do that because Madison is looking mighty fine. Alright, so thanks everyone for listening. Matt always lovely chatting with you. Thank you. And hopefully we'll be reunited as a threesome with Ronnie next week. Yes, let's tell everybody where to follow us on Twitter. I'm @lifeonthemlessedben. I'm @besideblog. And don't forget to check out some of the other shows on the sideshow network. And thank you guys for listening and we'll be back to do it again next week. Great. Alright. Bye. Bye guys. If you like Watch what Crap-ins, you can listen ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery App or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey at Wondery.com/survey. Are you in trouble with the law? Need a lawyer who will fight like hell to keep you out of jail? We defend and we fight just like you want your own children to defend it. Whether you're facing a drug charge, caught up on a murder wrap, accused of committing war crimes, look no further than Paul Bergren. All the big guys go to Bergren because he gets everybody off. You name it, Paul can do it. Need to launder some money, broker a deal with a drug cartel, take out a witness, from Wondery. The makers of Dr. Death and over my dead body comes a new series about a lawyer who broke all the rules. Doesn't it funny how witnesses disappear or how evidence doesn't show up or somebody doesn't testify correctly? In order to win, at all costs. If Paul asked you to do something, it wasn't a request. It was an order. I'm your host Brandon James Jenkins. Follow Criminal Attorney on the Wondery App or wherever you get your podcast. You can listen to Criminal Attorney early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery App or on Apple Podcasts.
Return to New York!
See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
