Tuntemus and Seneschaal vie to tell the story of “The Gods’ Feud”, Dvergura wants to jump to her favorite bits and the battles, Skeyo wants to hear the romantic parts, and Laallafee the elf is appalled at the sensationalizing of warfare in story.
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Tretchley, backstabbing, murder. Emmy winning the Tretters is back for an all-new season. Here we go again. Join me for the ultimate game of survival. We're making it to the end. There's a matter of life and death. This game is torch on us. I can feel my blood pressure rise. If you carry on with that cocky attitude, you might get yourself in trouble. Oh, I've missed this. The Tretters, streaming January the 9th, only on Peacock. It's Wednesday wonders science fiction and fantasy on the mutual audio network. The following audio drama is rated G for general audiences. [MUSIC PLAYING] Now, some chronicles say the goddess arranged for them to be at the same place at the same time. Faith or destiny ordained by the divine. Is it really fate or destiny, then? If the gods are arranging your life for you, or just interference on their part? Well, other histories tell it was accidental or coincidental that they were in the same place. That would be consequences of choice and chaos. But they all agree that the goddess caused events in the borderwoods that brought them together. Right? The lad was hunting and was chasing after the stag, which she had injured. And so he was all alone and by himself when the goddess gave his horse a whoop. Or a horrific monster of the forest sprang out and frightened the horse. What kind of monster? Some say a pteroson looks like an angry bear with giant antlers and snakes for arms. That would mean a mixing of mammal and reptile. That would be very horrific indeed. Ooh, we can talk forest creatures too. We'll definitely talk. And other stories use their local creatures for the monster. There's a whole side tale of the deal Prulala had to make with the forest lord Daesos to make the monster appear at just the right time and how all that ended up. And the offspring that resulted? A whole nother set of legends. Maybe that should be for another time too. Well, it was a dangerous moment where the heir apparent of the east might fall from his horse or get struck by a stout tree branch to great injury. The princess of the west heard the ruckus in the wood and so took off on her own horse to chase after the danger. And as you have said, she was an expert horse rider. Yes, braving the dangers. She charged through the trees underbrush and uneven ground. And don't forget the monster about... Yeah, until she caught alongside the prince and was able to calm down his horse. Or as some chroniclers say, the goddess ceased panicking the horse now that the two had come together. So it's believed these gods actively intervene in the lives of humans. That's what makes the hero's story so powerful. That the gods would take enough interest in the hero's life to take an active part in it. Or they were so bored out of their skulls and godland that they take some poor random sod and mess up their lives. That's another reason why the gods lost favor in the minds of humans. But the people of that ancient culture believed in the gods' activities in the affairs of men. Fervently, idiots. It is not a sign of lack of wisdom to acknowledge a wider, more complicated world than what can be seen with the simple eye or experience in a lifetime. Don't tell me you believe in the gods of... Of the humans' invention, hardly. But the elven people know that there are deeper mysteries and wider truths. Even more distant worlds than what is immediately evident to the eye and ear and our collective experience. We were getting to the romantic beginnings of this story at some point. And the two royal heirs alone together in the forest, in a rare moment when none of their official court obligations weighed upon their attentions, found themselves entranced and captivated with each other. In the classic telling, the goddess of light and love bathed them in her glow and the two were instantly in love with each other. So they were manipulated into being a couple, apart from their own fancies. Not at all. The goddess of love only amplified the natural attraction and bonding the two felt for each other before anything happened to force them apart. In essence, she just hastened the inevitable. You really go in for these godling characters, don't you, kid? That's the classics. For a long time, it was all I had available to read. It wasn't until after the two became helplessly enamored with each other that they discovered the others' identity to their dismay. Now they realized how impossible it seemed that they would be able to continue seeing each other. And by seeing each other, it is meant continuing to experience that young love they had in the woods over and over. Their love was pure, sincere, and blessed by the goddess and not blinded by the enthusiasm that accompanies first encounters with young couples. Or the second or third encounters they had. (laughs) - You must have only seen the body ale house performances of this story. - Their love was pure. Let go, Ladi. Classic story it may be, but acknowledging the lusts of youth in such a meeting makes them more real as figures in a story. And we can all relate to the spring of our lives and its joys and inevitable pitfalls. - There's a lovely parting speech by each of these characters in the classic court theatrical, the prince and princess in the wood in which the two young royals vow that no matter they are noble position or obligation and in defiance of the two kingdoms hatred for each other, they will overcome and prevail. And it lasts meet again when their love can finally flourish. - I would love to hear such an enraptured exchange. Perhaps you could recite it for us. - Ah, another time perhaps. We must continue with the larger narrative at hand. - I've heard him do it before. It's not bad. Both parts too. (laughs) - The two royals returned to their respective courts and say nothing to anyone about their clandestine encounter with the heir to the enemy throng. - Accept the princess who engages an underling to-- - Ah, my excited dwarf will tell that part of the story a little later on. - Ah, but it's my favorite part. - Yes, and we will tell that part of the story in its proper place and time in a context that makes it a favorite part of the story. - Some number of years pass and the two young lovers are pining away for their new love, determined to make good on their vow to each other. Meanwhile, the uneasy peace between East and Westfinnen is getting more and more strained. And then one day both the prince and princess are approached by a stranger who has a plan to bring them together for all time. He tells them he knows how each are longing to be with the other and how it seems impossible for them to be a couple publicly and tells them that he has a plan that will allow them to be together openly, forever. - That doesn't sound suspicious at all. - That's a strange figure indeed. - He's cold, the emissary. - But how is this emissary able to get access to the courts of both kingdoms and to gain the ear of two of the most important and vulnerable figures of each court and able to do this nearly simultaneously? - Because he, now that should have been the question these young royal lovers should have asked. - A question brought up by someone who has lived centuries at a royal court of her own. - Elvin courts are nothing like the human ones but my objections remain the same. - And what was the motivation of the emissary? - But the two were too enamored with each other to be suspicious and too excited to think about the dangers or consequences. - I thought you did not know this, Dolly. - It's young love. You don't need to know the story to know how they'd react. - What was the plan of the emissary? - To go to war! - What? - What? - Truly? - Yes. The situation was deteriorating anyways and so his plot was to start a full-scale war between East and Westfidden and then when the war ended as all such wars must, the emissary could negotiate a treaty between the two kingdoms and to seal the treaty and to finally end hostilities between them. The Prince of the East and the Princess of the West would wed. - How long did human wars last? - Months, years, decades, till one gets tired of fighting the other, kind of like human marriage. - That's a horrible plan. Thousands of people to die just so a noble couple could get married. - That's how royalty thinks and behaves towards their peasant people. - Why not the two of them step down from their positions and be happy together? - Royals don't really control their own destiny. - Yeah, not everyone can just drop their royal obligations and abandon their responsibilities to their alpha matriarch to go on some soul-searching wandering in the name of self-fulfillment. - What do you know of any of my obligations to my mother and matron queen? - Uh, uh, no, no. - My matron mother ordained a war of death and killing within her own people that I could not abide. And if more royal siblings chose loif in love instead of death and destruction, there would be more light and spark and less darkness in this world. - Well, historically speaking in this story-- - I'm sorry for that out first. - No, you don't apologize for that. The world needs more light, like you said. - Historically speaking in this story-- - You have flowers and bunnies and nice thoughts but the reality is the royal chew up their helpless subjects at their whim, not giving a care for the blood spilt on their petty machinations. - Historically speaking in this story-- - If a prince is the heart and spark of his people, he could not imagine doing something to gravely endanger their subjects. - That's just idealistic dreaming. - With my prince, it is proof. - Historically speaking in this story-- - You might need to shout that. - The emissary was able to manipulate both sides so that hostilities broke out on the borders between East and West Kingdoms. Both kings sent out banners for an all-out war while forces fought each other along the borders. The wood where the prince and princess met was burned in its entirety. - There's symbolism for you. - But it was discovered that the emissary-- - Not yet. - Don't reveal that part of the story yet. - From what part? - The emissary was from the southern kingdom of Sorland, a rival to its northern neighbors. - Or we could reveal that now. - The southern kingdom? - Yes. The kingdoms of Viddin shared a border with a larger kingdom from the south. Sorland. The southern kingdom was larger than either East or West Viddin, though the two of them combined were bigger than their southern name. - Which is what happened when they found out. - And they found out a little later on. - The two kingdoms to the north found out. This is getting a little muddled. - All right, the Viddin kingdoms mustered their armies and drew up against each other, brother patron god against sister patron goddess. - But then the emissary revealed what he had done on behalf of the southern kingdom. - The one called Sorland? - Before the battle could be engaged in earnest. - When they discovered this, what happened to the two armies poised against each other? - They settled their differences and joined forces to march on the southern kingdom. - Well, at least that war was avoided. - Except now there was no need to marry the young prince and princess off to seal the peace treaty that would result when the East and West kingdoms ended their war. - Yes, East and West Viddin, now with a common enemy that had plotted against the two of them, were now on amicable terms with each other and were marching south under a united banner. - We didn't want to let a good mustering of armies go to waste after all. - So now the southern kingdoms, Sorland, which was larger than either East or West Viddin, was now not as large as the combined host of the two kingdoms. - And so there was a war with the three kingdoms simultaneously. Now the kingdom of West Viddin was known for its cavalry and their horse units were known for dominating battles. - The East kingdom of Viddin was known for its wooded lands and so they had were known as hunters with bows. And to every boy of age had to practice the bow daily so they could join the deadly elite archers that favored their battles. - And the southern kingdom of Sorland, having a greater population, created highly trained foot soldiers and had a large infantry that worked together like a single unit and was famous on the battlefield. - And so that's how you get the classic units of the hand battle game of soldier aero horse. And depending on who you choose to be on your army, the infantry of Sorland, the archers of East Viddin or the cavalry of West Viddin, you have soldier, aero, and horse pitted against each other. Soldier beats aero who beats horse who beats soldier. - That's it? - Yes. That's the history of the hand battle game of soldier aero and horse. - But that's no good. - What do you mean? - You can't stop there. - Well, that's all there is to the history of the game. The different armies of different types pitted against each other. - But what about the prince and the princess and their vow to each other? - Who was this emissary? - And how are the gods involved in this war? - You did leave out the part where the battle breaks up and the three armies turned against each other. - You've got your audience hooked. You can't leave them hanging by a thread like this. (laughs) - Everyone settle in. This is gonna take a good long while. - You've been listening to soldier aero horse, part two, a fireside short story of the Dungeons and Dental series by Unchained Productions written and directed by David Ian. Voice talent by Danny Baldwin as Scale. John Campbell as Aziz. Grace Madlan as Varista. Karen O'Brien as to Vergira. Jack Harvison as Tuntimus. Daniel Rovon as Seneshell. And Aaron Summonsby as Wallachie. Sound Engineering by Dino Tiavwil. Sound Design by David Ian. Theme by Ron Pervich. Soldier aero horse, part two, is a fireside short story of the Dungeons and Dental series by Unchained Productions. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (mumbles)
Tuntemus and Seneschaal vie to tell the story of “The Gods’ Feud”, Dvergura wants to jump to her favorite bits and the battles, Skeyo wants to hear the romantic parts, and Laallafee the elf is appalled at the sensationalizing of warfare in story.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
