Northside Church - Sydney
Guest Speaker: Mike Hardie The Swing Theory
You're listening to another great message from Northside Community Church. Good morning everyone. For those who don't know, my name is Mike Hardy, and Sam introduced me very nicely before, so that was good, and it's great to be here this morning. You guys have got some very talented people here. Mike, what a voice. I know I heard you sing before, but I was just thinking, what an awesome voice you've got. What a gift. Isn't it great when you've got people that can use their gifts that inspire and focus us and just point us in a direction. We've been blessed with the arts and with music, an incredible thing, and then I look at all these musicians, and I think fantastic. And then I hear a Bible reading from someone who reads so eloquently, and then the most powerful person in the room, I was joking this morning, sound man. The guy who, if he doesn't like it, can actually turn the sound off. I mean, he might not be doing it next week, but at least for the moment, and I came in this morning and I saw all these guys setting up, and I've lost your name again, sorry, Carter, our American friends, who's becoming more and more Aussie every minute. From Detroit, is that right? And he's fixed up the presentation, and I'm just thinking of all the people, and that's just a few people, a little on the gentleman who welcomed me this morning and all the people that go, that set this up so that we can worship and gather together and be encouraged and be inspired. It takes a whole team, takes a whole community. I want to talk to you about this morning for a few minutes about what happens when that community, when this team, when you and I don't have energy, lose motivation, get discouraged and get down. Because when we do it affects everything that we do together and it affects who we are and affects the way we go about the challenges that God has for our life. And I want to talk to you this morning about what I call swing theory, swing theory. And I'm going to explain it in a few minutes, but it's one of my favorite stories and analogies about the importance of encouragement. You know, the passage that we just read, Psalm 42 verses 5 and 6, David is writing, pouring out his heart in journal fashion. I don't know how many people he have a journal, or you ever just jot down your thoughts and reflect on what's happening at the moment. Great thing to do. I'm pretty poor. The first years I go and buy a journal, I do it for a few days, then I come back three months later and go, "Oh, that's right, journaling." And I have another go again. But over the years with my random journals, I've flicked back over them and it's amazing how many times when I journaled I was actually in a difficult time of my life. And I was actually using the writing process to express to God either in prayer or in reflection about a lack of motivation or disappointment or heartache. And here is David saying, "Why am I discouraged?" Sometimes people are so discouraged, they don't even know why they're discouraged. You ever wake up and you just have that feeling of heaviness and being down? And if you know anything about medical science or health, you'll know that sometimes that's just purely a result of adrenaline in our body or the chemicals working or not working. It can just be a result of you've had a huge high and now you're on a bit of a downer. And if you've tuned into that, you realize, "Oh, and a few hours, this feeling will pass." But sometimes you can't quite put your finger on what it is and if you're down and if you're discouraged. And here's the Samus saying this, but he says, "Even though I don't know why I'm feeling the way I am, I'll put my hope in God, I'll praise him again, my Savior and my God. Now I'm deeply discouraged, but I will remember you. I love the honesty, but I love the faith. And sometimes in church and in life, we need to have permission to say, "You know what, I'm feeling really down." And one of the things I've realized is that in our churches and in our communities and in our cities, there are people even in this room here today that are more discouraged than maybe even they realize or we realize. We get used to relating in a certain kind of way. We come in, "Hey, how are you? I'm good." And we say that, but deep inside underneath the surface, we may be deeply discouraged and down and confused, doubting, wandering. Where am I going? What's happening? Why has this happened to me? And it's not always appropriate to every single person that you meet in a casual conversation to say when they say, "Hey, how are you? Oh, I'm really down in the dumps," it's like, "Whoa, okay." And they're like, "Whoa, I was just going to the bathroom, oh, do I go or do I stay and help this person? Anyone know what I'm talking about?" And so there's appropriate times and places to express hopefully with friends and hopefully with people that we're doing life with how we're really struggling. And I call this the reality of the fact that sometimes we all get stuck in the mud. Do you remember that game? That's good. I say that to some, I speak a lot to young people and I talk about the game stuck in the mud and they're like, "What?" And when I was a kid, you know, obviously a few years ago, there was a game we used to play in preschool and then in primary school, at youth clubs, at youth groups stuck in the mud. And the idea of the game for those of you who don't know is that everybody runs around and if you get tagged by someone, you'll stop and you're stuck in the mud and then you need somebody coming around and a crawl under your legs and set you free, okay? Simple game, lots of fun. But I think of this story as an analogy of life and the fact that sometimes we're running around in life and we're busy and we're going about our activities and then all of a sudden we get stuck. And when you get stuck, it can be really hard to get unstuck by yourself. You need outside help. You need someone to come along and actually their presence and their skills, their abilities, their words, whatever it may be, which we'll talk about in a moment, can help you get unstuck in life. And I feel sorry for the person who goes through life and there are so many who get stuck and have no one to come along and help them get unstuck. And this is where for me, the idea of swing theory begins to kick in. In 2nd Samuel chapter 19 verse 7 is a powerful passage about the life of David and his soldiers who have gone out into battle to fight for him against a rogue son and a man who's been in rebellion against him and they fought, but now his son is lost and he's discouraged and he's down, but then his commander comes to him and says, "David, go out and encourage your men." I swear by the law that if you don't go out, not a man will be left with you by nightfall. This will be worse for you than all the calamities that have come on you from your youth till now. What's he saying? His command is saying, "David, I know you're down." But if you don't encourage these men who have worked their guts out for you, who have sacrificed some of them their lives, others are exhausted from what they've done for you, their king, their commander. If you don't encourage them, they will desert you. And isn't it true that in community, in small groups, in teams, when someone gets really discouraged, it almost sets off a series of events. They get discouraged, they get disorientated, they get disillusioned, they start questioning the team, they start questioning the purpose behind it all, and pretty soon they move away. And you say, "Whatever happened to so-and-so, whatever happened to Tim and whatever happened to Betty?" Well, I don't know. It's got to be in there bonnet, and then they were gone. But if you trace back to, it wasn't just the be in there bonnet, which is a great phrase and concept if you think about it, it was that they got down and discouraged about something, and they didn't process, or they didn't find encouragement, they didn't get courage put in them by somebody else that could help them in the area where they've got stuck. And this is what I love about what I call swing theory. There are people all around about us that are stuck. I love this image in this picture of this girl who sits on a swing because it reminds me of a powerful, true story of a young lady in the United States who used to walk through the local parks, and she used to see mothers groups that would gather in the parks like a play group, and they would be chatting away and connecting, which is a good thing, but their kids would be sitting on swings and no one would be there to push them. And if you know anything about when you get on a swing, especially if you're little and your legs aren't quite long enough, you sit on the swing and you can't really get going because you need somebody to help you get going. So this girl would walk through the park and she would see the girls sitting on the swings and she would walk up behind them and she would give them a gentle push because she realized that if you give them a gentle push, pretty soon they'll start to get their own momentum and then they can keep going on their own. But sometimes you just need to get someone going again. Well the funny thing is this girl, as she got older, discovered her own battle and challenge with weight and she had put on a lot of weight and got to a point in her life where she realized, you know, I have to do something about this. I don't want to live like this, I don't want to be this person anymore. And so she decided in the same way that I used to go along to the park and I used to give the kids on the swings a gentle push to help them get going, I need somebody to come alongside me and help me get going. And so she decided to put a little group of people together that they would meet in a house and it's kind of like a connect group I suppose or a small group or whatever you call them here in this church community and they'd meet together and the purpose of the group would be to encourage each other to reach their goals in losing weight and being healthy and eating right. Pretty soon the idea of the fact that they were meeting together to encourage each other to catch on and other people said, "I need these too because I can't do it on my own." These groups started to multiply at a rapid rate and became what we now know as what. Weight Watchers, you know the story, what an intelligent community this is. Gene Nittich was the girl's name, the founder of Weight Watchers International, thousands and thousands of groups all around the world and the concept of Weight Watchers beyond just the health program is that you need to do this challenge in community because you can't do it by yourself. I've discovered in my life and in observation now, I was just saying to Jesse on the way over here, this year will be 20 years that I've been in Christian leadership ministry. Now you find that hard to believe because I look 25. Thank you very much for your encouragement there. Sometimes you have to build yourself up, you know, we'll get to that in a moment. But 20 years and over 20 years I've had my fair share of discouragement and I've seen a lot of people have their fair share of discouragement but the one critical component I've discovered for people that last in faith and go on to build a solid life of faith and bare fruit through all the different seasons of life, through winter seasons and summer seasons, through dark times and light times has been the power of friends and community that can come along and when we get stuck in the mud, they help us get unstuck. Swing theory. Swing theory is this idea and it's a theory because you have to test it out to see if it really works. Swing theory is the idea that with your gentle push I can get moving and pretty soon I'll be moving on my own momentum. I don't know how true it is yet in your life, you'll have to test it but I've discovered in my life and I have this theory that when I'm doing life, if I'm not doing it in community and with others, there will come a point where when I get stuck I'll have no one to come alongside me and help me. Deuteronomy chapter 1 verse 38 and chapter 3 verse 28, two times the Lord says to Moses that he needs to encourage young Joshua who's about to take over the leadership of the nation of Israel and he says to him these two phrases twice. When God says something once, you listen, when he says it twice, you better make sure you're doing what he says because he's trying to be clear about something. Deuteronomy 1, 38, he says, "But your assistant Joshua, son of a nun, or nun." The old joke that every preacher likes to throw in but your assistant Joshua because that can't possibly happen if she's a true nun, not that they had nuns back then, your assistant Joshua son of nun will enter it, the promised land, encourage him because he will lead Israel to inherit it. Put courage in him, get alongside him, help him, cheer him on, make sure that he knows that he's not in this alone because he's got a massive challenge ahead of him. He's going to do this but he needs encouragement. He then goes on not long after and he says, "But commission Joshua, set him apart and encourage and strengthen him for he will lead this people across and will cause them to inherit the land that you will see." My question is what happens if Moses doesn't encourage him? What does it take longer? Does Joshua get discouraged when there's difficult battles ahead? It's in the difficult seasons of life that we need someone to come alongside us and implement this swing theory that helps us when we get stuck, get going again. The question I have this morning is how do you encourage because there's a lot of people out there that say, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, we get it, encourage, great, got the gist of your message, that's fantastic, let's just get on with it." Great. The problem is there's a lot of people out there that are with good intention or encouraging but it's not encouraging. You have people that come along and tell you because they're nervous and they're scared? You sang so awesome up there on the stage today but you're thinking, "You know what? No, I didn't. It was my first time I sang bad. I need to do more singing lessons. I'm surprised they put me up so soon, not talking about anyone on the stage here this morning." A metaphorical reference to me and I'm just feeling bad about it and you can't go, "You're the best singer ever." That is not discouraging. That's flattery and flattery doesn't help. Encouragement operates at the most deepest levels in our souls when someone addresses our fears with truth and with healing words. I love this passage in Hebrews chapter 10 verses 24 and 25 that says, "Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works and let us not neglect our meeting together." That's the community. Don't do it alone. As some people do, hopefully you're not one of the some people. Let us not neglect our meeting together as some people do but encourage one another especially now that the day of his return is drawing near. In other words, the closer we get to Jesus coming back to rule and reign, you better make sure you are being an encourager. You better make sure you're going around and inspiring and putting courage and hope and life into others around about you because people will operate with a smile but underneath the surface of the smile, there's a heart that longs for encouragement. We're created that way and when you encourage people, it gives people energy. You know when you just have a conversation with someone some days and you walk away and just go, "Man, I don't want to hang out with that person. Every time I hang out with that person, this is negative and I walk away just going, "Oh, but then there's other people. You can't wait to be here. You just want to stand near them because when you stand near them, they say something that just lifts you up. You walk away, positive, you're feeling energized. Sometimes you'll have a coffee with someone or a cup of tea depending on what you're interested in or chocolate and you walk away from that discussion with new found energy and passion. So, how do you encourage three things, your presence, your words, your presence? Your presence, your words, your presence, it sounds like two things but if you look closely at the words, it's three things. The first one is your presence. This is what I call the "be with" factor. Everyone needs time. Everybody needs sometimes someone to be with them but even amongst the silence and everybody needs someone sometimes who's just available. You know the person you can just turn up and just be with something really tragic happens in your life. I'll never forget a time in my life, earlier on in this last decade where I went through a very painful time in my life and I had friends that I could just turn up at their place or they would come around in my place and they wouldn't tell me all the things that I needed to know that I thought I already knew anyway and they wouldn't throw scripture verses at me and tell me all the things that I have to know to make sure that I'm a strong Christian they would just hang out with me and just their presence alone was encouraging. You know this when you sit in a hospital sometimes and you're waiting and you're wondering what's going to happen? Am I going to get bad news? Am I going to get good news? And it sometimes can make such a big difference to have someone just sitting there with you. I remember my grandma before she passed away a couple of years ago at the age of 93 years of age. We used to drive out to the western suburbs of Sydney to emu plains and I pick her up and take her to an eye specialist appointment or a doctor's appointment and sometimes she would be you know worried and a little bit discouraged and nervous and she would just say to me thank you so much for coming with me I felt better just having you there and I didn't tell her oh it's all going to be fine man I just was with her and she felt supported it was a story that psychologists tell about how they did research and that when they get a person to stand in a bucket of ice when no one is present they'll stand in the bucket of ice until they experience pain a guy can't stand in a longer and they'll jump out of the bucket but when someone stands in a bucket of ice and they have a friend present or somebody else or a peer even sometimes an opponent they'll stand in that ice bucket through all kinds of levels of pain because when somebody else is present it makes all the difference which is why when I used to play cricket as a teenager and my dad used to turn up to the games he was a shift worker and he couldn't always turn up to all of my games but when he didn't sometimes he'd surprise me I'd be at a cricket game early in the morning and then I would look out across and I see my dad standing on the sideline and I'm telling you energy was like wind got in my sail and I mean I wanted to impress him but I played better I ran harder for the ball I bowled faster because the presence of my dad was there helping me makes all the difference the second thing is your words and wise timing is everything sometimes words without answers are the most helpful not always sometimes we need to give answers but sometimes we need to discern what's going on in a person's life and say hang on do they need answers now or do they just need to hear me say man I'm feeling your pain too or maybe I don't even know how bad your pain is sometimes those things can be healing words that heal where we as I mentioned earlier address a person's fear without flattering them you know what that must have been hard for you to get up and sing for the first time this morning oh man it was so hard you understand me but you know what good on you for having the courage to get up there for your very first time oh don't give up unless of course really bad singer there's no hope for you okay that's when those words can become healing and the words that cast vision and hope you know sometimes a doctor tells us the reality of our situation but they say you know what I'm not going to lie to you this is not great news but now we can implement a plan and if we implement this plan there'll be hope at the end of the tunnel there'll be light at the end of the tunnel and sometimes those words are healing and they cast vision for us I love to tell young people when they come to me and say I've messed up really bad or this has happened or I've blown it with my parents or I've done this and my girlfriend doesn't want to know me anymore I say you know what yep you've messed up you've blown it but let me tell you a good news story the good news story is what's happened in the past doesn't equal what can happen in the future what you choose now and the way you go forwards and the path you get on can make all the difference for your future can you see a different future I said to a guy the other day who we led to Christ who came out of prison a massive problems up and down with drugs and alcohol and I said to him the other day you know what you need a good news story because you've been told a bad news story a whole life so let's write out a good news story the kind of good news story that God wants to have for your life by the end of that discussion he's sending me text messages he's coming into serving our church and he's saying thank you I feel like I'm going in the direction of a good news story those words can bring healing Proverbs 1225 says worry weighs a person down an encouraging word she is a person up and finally your presence creative thoughtfulness my brother is a youth pastor where we are and years ago we used to serve in a local church and my assistant at the time really creative person when it came to encouragement and because the Bible says think of ways to spur one another on to love and good deeds she was really good at thinking up creative ways and so she turns up at our house one day with six packets of sanitarium sorry buddy I know you're part of Kellogg's but with six packets of sanitarium good start I don't even have to have that anymore and all wrapped up in a big bow and a card and I'm like what we don't need cereal it's not for you you clown and so she comes in she puts it in our in our cupboard and the next morning my brother wakes up and this is what you hear from our rooms it's like four young guys all living in this house together in here oh this is awesome oh you're the best her name was Fu Fiona and she wrote this amazingly encouraging card but she packed up with his favorite cereal and got him six boxes of it that story alone not only encouraged him and inspired him through the card she wrote but I tell the story and then he tells the story and all these other people get encouraged just because of one creative idea creative gifts right people letters when was the last time you wrote one of your team leaders or someone that is part of your community or your small group a letter just to tell them all the things you appreciate about them you have no idea how much of an impact that can have I got a green folder I think everybody should have a green folder in your filing cabinet just go get a green folder and the green folder should be for letters of encouragement or emails don't know what you're going to do about text messages but you just put them in there and when you're having a down day you go to the green folder hello green folder I need you badly today and you start reading some of the things that people have said to remind you who God says you are and how others view you that are on your team man in a day and age where everything's digital it's pretty powerful to actually write a handwritten letter these days it's pretty cool to get one of those in the mail just a tip and the last thing is if you want to really encourage someone with with presents give them opportunities gifts an opportunity that you know they get the chance to to go somewhere or to do something or to take on a responsibility that they once didn't have that says I believe in you I want to give you this chance to do something that maybe you don't think you're ready to do but I believe in you and you'll be amazed how that will help so ask the question what's going to motivate them and finally I want to finish with this what do you do when you're discouraged and you don't have someone to just to encourage you I believe you do what David what David did that we read about in one Samuel chapter thirty verse six the passage description says but David encouraged himself in the Lord his God that that passage that we read as we started the in the Bible reading this morning why am I so discouraged why am I so down I will rejoice I will return I will go to the Lord my God I will worship him I will love him I will serve him I found in the darkest most discouraging times of my life even with the support of others I still needed God and let me tell you this it's God's presence it's the presence of Jesus God with us Emmanuel it's that it's the words of Jesus a promise of hope of restoration and it's the literal gifts and presence of Jesus his gift to us of salvation a life and forgiveness that can make all the difference in our lives and so if you're here today and you say you know what I have I've come here this morning and yeah I've been smiling and I've been acting appropriately for social reasons but you know what deep down inside I am discouraged can I urge you first of all to go to the greatest encourage of all the Lord Jesus Christ because it's his presence his words and his presence that a gifts that can make a massive difference in your life and then you know what instead of saying no one ever encourages me you start to be the encourager imagine encouragement revolution breaks forth on the north side of Sydney this church gets filled up because people are saying I came here I don't even know if I believe in Jesus but they are the most encouraging people on the planet in my darkest moment in my most lonely moment this person came along and spoke into my deepest fears and struggles and pain they were there for me their presence it was their words and their gifts that helped me get into community and get going again swing theory when you get stuck and you don't know how to get going is when someone comes along and you just may be that person and you give someone a gentle push not a hard push that they fall off the swing just enough of a push so that pretty soon they can get going on their own can I ask you to bow your heads with me please this morning and I want to pray for you in a moment we're going to go into communion and as we do let this be a chance to remind yourself of God's presence for us father so many times in my life I've been discouraged the Lord it's been friends and family and peace that it's just them being with me and their appropriate words just the right time that have been healing to my soul and sometimes it's their gifts that have given me the motivation to take that next step when it felt so daunting and so difficult to get up and say I'm going to go again but Lord I want to give you thanks that you have most of all been present in my life helping me your words of life have restored hope in me so many times so Lord God I pray today for every person in this place that your words your literal presence and your gifts will fill us and surround our lives so that we are energized and full of life to do what you've called us to do in this life we pray in the mighty name of Jesus amen thank you so much for listening today. - Thank you. - Thank you.