MK040 Sermons
Introducing Family Ministry (Audio)
Well good morning. It's nice to be with you this morning. I don't always get a chance to necessarily speak a lot on Sunday mornings. And this morning I'm excited because I get to share with you a little bit about what I do and a little bit about the area and the ministries of the church that I have the opportunity to lead and to serve in. And you know as we think about our faith and our journey of faith each one of us has a unique story. And some of us have grown up in churches and others came to faith as maybe a teenager or an adult and maybe someone here today is still working through the whole idea of who Jesus is and whether to place their trust in him or not. And my story is similar to some of yours probably in that I grew up attending church and I grew up in a home that had Christian parents and the church that I grew up in really valued biblical knowledge and knowing all about God and all about the Bible. And in the environment or in that environment I began to conclude that those who knew the most and those who acted the most Christian were viewed as the most mature. And so I developed a view of following God that meant doing the right things and knowing the right things as much as possible about God and about his word. And though there was probably a peace inside of my heart that knew and understood my own brokenness on the inside I think I learned to kind of reason it away and I just told myself I needed to try a little harder and I needed to do a little better and I needed to know a little bit more. You know there didn't seem to be any room in that environment for admitting the struggles on the inside or for asking the hard questions. It seemed that truth was black and white and if something was the truth it was the truth and because it was the truth and you just needed to believe it you needed to live it. And you know sometimes that truth was based more on preference and tradition rather than maybe on what the Bible said or didn't say. And as a result when I left home and headed for college I left with a lot of knowledge although looking back maybe not quite as much as I thought. But I had very little understanding of how to use that knowledge to relate to God and to relate to others in significant ways. I didn't know how really to love and to be loved and I didn't understand the grace that allows us to be broken but still loved and broken but forgiven and broken but still valued and believed in. And please don't get me wrong as I look back on my experience growing up. I did get glimpses of that. I knew my parents loved me. My father was there with me when I accepted Christ as my Savior and that was a significant event in my life that he got to share with me. And I can think back of people growing up. I remember a guy in our church named Ron and Ron was just a super encouraging guy and he made it a point to interact with me and to encourage me. And you know I remember another guy named Glenn and Glenn taught me how to do something significant. He taught me how to operate a sound system and how to run the sound for church services and do something significant in our church. And besides that, outside of that he also really took an interest in me. And you know when I go home to Iowa this Christmas I am really looking forward to seeing those guys and connecting with them and others that were a part of my life growing up. You know but as I also think about my story and my journey of faith, it wasn't really until I got to college that I ran into somebody who God would use to change my life in some really, really significant ways. And Ted was a teacher that I had my first semester at Baptist Bible College and he also was not just a professor there but he served as one of the resident directors in one of the guys dorms on campus. And for some reason still unknown to me even to this day, he asked me to come and to be one of his RAs, to move out of the dorm that I had been living in that first semester and to move into his dorm and be an RA and work with him. And I did that and spent the next three years living and working with Ted in the dorm there. And Ted spent probably a year and a half just trying to break through the external shell that I had kind of created around myself as he tried to get to my heart and to help me to see a whole new way to live and to love God and to be authentic and real about the things going on in my life. You know he was patient with me but he still pushed and he was gracious and loved me in spite of my sinfulness and in spite of my failure and he believed in me. I can still remember a time one night when he told me that he trusted me to make a significant decision in the dorm. That really wasn't a decision that was my responsibility to make. It really he had the authority to do that. But as we were having a conversation about it, I remember we were standing in the hallway or in the stairwell and he looked at me and said, "Tim, I trust you. You can make that decision." And you know really spoke into my life in a way that you know I was valued and I was trusted and I could do that. And you know my life and my journey has been drastically different as a result of Ted's influence on my life. You see I needed someone that would move towards me and show me what love was. Not just teach me about it or tell me about it. And I needed someone to extend grace to me so that I could experience it, not just be able to define it. You know I needed someone to show me how to be able to extend that to others and to love them for who they are and where they're at and not to judge them because maybe they don't quite measure up. And I needed someone to tell me that they believed in me, that I could do it and to show that value in me. I don't know what your story is. You know maybe can you think back to people in your life as you grew up who move towards you in significant ways or who loved you for who God made you to be, who extended grace even when you messed up, people who believed in you wholeheartedly as a kid. Maybe it was when you were a kid or maybe it was even not until you were an adult. I would think about that for a minute and I would encourage you and challenge you. If someone comes to mind just jot it down there on your note sheet and I'd encourage you just to you know to send them a note, write them an email this week and just thank them for the way that God used them in your life. I took a moment on Friday to do that, send a quick email to Ted just thanked him for the way God has used him in my life and he shot me back one pretty quick and in typical Ted style said Tim don't forget that that goes both ways and so even still encouraging me and you know loving me in that way. So you know who's the Ted in your life. That's really the question. The reality is we all need people who love us and who believe in us and this is something that's really super super important for our kids and for our students to experience as they grow up as well. You know they need people who love them and take an interest in them and walk through life with them and invest and influence them. People who can help them to experience God's love through their relationship with him and not just tell them about it. Our kids and our students are the most valuable resource that we have and we have an important and really significant role to play in their lives. You see they need loving adults to invest in their lives in significant ways to help them to develop an authentic faith. You know a faith that's real a faith that's vibrant a faith that's strong a faith that is not just their parents faith but a faith of their own a faith that they've wrestled with that connects to their lives a faith that can carry them through whatever life brings their way. You know and I don't think it's a secret for us at all that our kids are growing up in the most secular culture ever here in the United States. It's a culture really that attacks their faith and you know they're growing up in a culture where truth is relative and where you know they face all these pressures that push them towards giving up on their faith and letting their faith go and you know over the last several years there have been lots of studies and lots of statistics about how you know students are leaving the church in droves when they leave high school and how their faith collapse when they head off into college or off into the real world and you know some studies say that up to even you know 60% of students walk away from their faith when they graduate. I've seen some that say 40 and some that say you know 70 or 75 and you know it doesn't really matter what the percentage is. You know as I look back on my experience growing up and the other students that I grew up with in middle school and high school and as I look over the last five years that I've been here at Coca-Cola and the students that have gone out from our student ministry I don't know what that percentage is but I can tell you that it's way too high much higher than I'm comfortable with and I think what we all want is we you know we sometimes we feel like all we can do is hope that they survive into adulthood but I think we want more than for them just to survive I think we really really want them to be able to thrive in this culture. You know this makes me think of an example in the book of Daniel where we see a group of three young men, three students really who face an evil culture with their faith intact. In the book of Daniel the Israelites are in captivity. Babylon has conquered the nation and taken many of the Jewish people back to Babylon as captives or exiles. Many of the best and the brightest young men were then kind of enveloped into the political system in an attempt to help them to create a new kind of Babylonian identity and move them away from their Jewish roots. So these young men were thrust into this brand new pagan culture that did not recognize the one true God but rather worship many different gods. The reality was that many of these Jewish people just simply assimilated into this new culture and did what they needed to do so they would fit in because if they didn't you know they would face some severe punishments and maybe even death. As we see there were a few that withstood the culture and the pressure that was all around them to conform and they were able to live out their faith in God in some pretty amazing ways. So here in Daniel chapter 3 we see the story of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego with their faith really put to the ultimate test. As you see there in verse 1 it tells us that King Nebuchadnezzar had a 90 foot tall gold image built and set up somewhere in his kingdom and when he gathered all his political leaders after he had this thing built, gathered them together all around it and he commanded them to bow down and to worship the image when they heard the music play. And oh by the way if you don't do that you'll be thrown into a blazing furnace. So here are these three guys in a foreign place away from their home, away from their family, around a bunch of people who didn't believe in their God and under intense peer and authoritative pressure to forsake everything that they were taught to believe. And what's that sound like in today's culture? Yeah college, right? College or maybe even the workplace that our students are graduates you know head to and after they graduate from high school a similar situation that our students walk into. And these three guys could have easily just bowed down and come back and confess to God later and probably you know moved on with life but their faith didn't allow them to do that. You know no one was watching no one probably would have batted an eye had they bowed down but you know they had a faith and they had a relationship with God that was more important to them than even their lives and they had a faith that was their own it wasn't mom and dad's it wasn't the youth pastors it wasn't you know the churches it wasn't grandpa and grandma's it wasn't their friends it was their own and they understood who they were and how they fit into God's big story. And so when the music played they refused to bow down to the image. And even though the king liked these three guys that this made him furious and as promised he had them thrown into the blazing furnace and the furnace was so hot that the guards who threw them in died from the heat. But once they were in the furnace the kings actually saw the three men that he had thrown in and then a fourth person and presumably you know an angel that God had sent to rescue them. You know in the fire with them and none of them were burned at all and so the king called them out of the fire and he said they didn't even as they approached they didn't even smell like smoke from being in the fire. And this is what the king said about their faith. Look at Daniel chapter three verses 28 through 30 says then Nebuchadnezzar said praise be to the God of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego who sent his angel and rescued his servants they trusted in him and defied the king's command and were willing to give up their lies rather than serve or worship any God except their own God. Therefore I decree that the people of any nation or language who say anything against the God of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego be cut into pieces and their houses be turned into piles of rubble for no God can save in this way then the king promoted Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego in the province of Babylon. And that's really what we want for our kids want for our students that's really a picture of authentic faith and that's what we want that's what I believe God wants for our kids and students as well and I want our students to walk out into the world owning their faith and knowing who they are and who God is and living that out in a culture changing way and not in a way that culture changes them and my guess is that's what you all want for them as well and you know to give our kids and students the best opportunity for that to be true in their lives believe we have to do something different than what the American church has traditionally done in the past to help them to develop an authentic faith and I think we have to view what we do with our kids and students and families in a very different way see there's a few things that I believe that just are not okay that I think I've seen the church do in the past as it came when it comes to kids and students and I don't believe it's okay just to tell kids and students truth and hope that they catch it and understand it. I also don't think it's okay to blame a student when they don't get it when they don't catch it. I don't believe it's okay to simply babysit kids so parents can enjoy church and I've seen churches that do that and that's their their only goal in in what they're doing with kids and and also on the other side I I don't believe it's okay to simply entertain kids and students I don't believe it's okay for kids and students to not enjoy coming to church it should be something that is an enjoyable and a valuable part of their lives. I don't believe it's okay to not encourage kids and students to ask and to wrestle with the tough questions of life and faith and I don't believe that it's okay to give overly simplistic answers to those very complex questions. I also don't believe it's okay to focus only on the external behavior and kind of ignore the heart behind it. That was a lot of my experience growing up and I don't believe it's okay to pursue biblical knowledge without connecting it to life. Please, I want you guys to understand as I share these things I'm not making accusations against those who have led ministries here at CCC in the past or or anything like that but I'm just looking at recent church history and these seem to be some of the ways that churches have attempted to engage the next generation and I don't think they help the next generation to develop an authentic faith. I think that the the kids in the student ministries here at CCC we're already heading in some really really great directions even before I got here or got involved in them and and you know we have some pretty amazing ministry leaders and volunteers who are working with our kids and our students weekend and week out but as I got with them got with those ministry leaders and talked with them I think we were all pretty convinced that we could do some things even better and if our goal was to help the next generation to develop an authentic faith and there were some things that were going to have to change in order for us to do that better and we needed a better strategy to help us do this more successfully to help us become more successful in accomplishing that goal of developing an authentic faith and this morning I want to introduce you to that strategy I want to introduce you to what we're calling family ministry and I'm excited just to share this about with you this morning and I know some of you may kind of hear the term family ministry and it may carry all kinds of different connotations based on your background and your church experience in the past so before I really dive in and tell you what we want that to be here at CCC let me tell you a couple things that it's not as we get going all right so first of all here at CCC family ministry is not having all the kids in the service sitting with their parents okay so some of you friends can breathe this eye relief I know you're getting a little stressed there but that's not what we mean when we talk about family ministry you know it's also not you know taking all the kids and throwing them all together so all the kids in a family are learning the same thing together that's not what we mean either it's not just family ministry is not just the latest greatest fad that Tim found on a youth ministry blog somewhere not what it is it's also not a you know not a series of new parent meetings and you know 12 weeks of you know how to raise your kids and students to have an authentic faith it's not that either maybe that's a piece somewhere down the road but that's not what we're talking about of this family ministry in fact family ministry is not also not a program it's not really a program I'd say it's more of a strategy and we kind of describe it this way we say the family ministry here at CCC exists to intentionally partner with families to help develop an authentic faith in the next generation we just say that one more time and the family ministry exists to intentionally partner with families to help develop authentic faith in the next generation and naturally you know when you hear of anything that's new or different the natural question that kind of pops up in your mind is is you know that may sound great but how is that different from what we're already doing you said we already have some good you know ministry environments for our kids and children so what's different and that that's a really good question I'm really excited to share some of that with you today and and as we talk about that there's I want to share two main ways that I believe a change to a family ministry style of approach is different than what we've done in the past and there's probably more than these two ways but these are the two the two main and probably most significant things that I think help us to understand what we what we mean and the shift to a family ministry and so the first way that it's different is has to do with the alignment of ministry environments to work towards the same goal you see as we sat down as ministry leaders we knew that if we wanted to help develop authentic faith in kids and students and we had to be a unified team that was all working towards the same end and we have seven different ministry environments here at CCC for kids and students and in the past these these environments were kind of under two different umbrellas we had the children's ministry which was kind of birth through sixth grade and then we had the student ministries which was seventh grade through twelfth grade and you know in some senses you know they operated even each environment kind of operated on their own and independent of each other even if they were under the same umbrella but by kind of bringing them all under the same umbrella of family ministry and aligning them all around the same end or the same goal we're beginning to develop them into a more cohesive unit that focuses on a child all the way from from birth through twelfth grade all with the goal from birth all the way through twelfth grade of helping them to be to develop an authentic faith and this is something that we've really been working on pretty hard the last couple years as ministry leaders and and volunteers and and we're you know this is something we'll continue to to work on and to develop and to improve improve this alignment between the ministry environments and I want to just take a moment I don't want to take for granted that all of you that are you know listening this morning know what our kids and our students environments are you know some of you may not have kids that use those or maybe you only have kids in a certain environment and you don't maybe even know or have been exposed to some of the other environments that have so let me just real quickly introduce to you our our ministry environments for kids and students and just share with you some of the you know the alignment piece that we've been working on we kind of share what our intention is and in each age group and how that builds towards the end result that we are working towards and so on the very beginning level we have the infant nursery for for our very you know youngest babies from birth or whenever you know mother and father are comfortable putting them in up through about crawling and right before you know right before they start walking and toddler nurseries kind of from there until they turn three and so in our nursery environments you know we're really trying to demonstrate God's love to babies and to toddlers through you know just through providing loving care and interaction and and helping them to to begin on the toddler level to to interact appropriately with each other and and really just by modeling God's love for them by the way we we interact with them and and I have to tell you a story last week I was coming down from teaching in the K through 4th environment and came down to get a cup of coffee and and I just could hear in the hallway someone in the infant nursery just really enjoying and and interacting and engaging a baby in there and I had to just go kind of stick my head in and see see who it was and what was going on and I tell you I just had to say thank you to our volunteers in there because they were they were really doing what we want to see done in there you know if it was me I'd probably just kind of sit back in the rocking chair and put my feet up and as long as the baby wasn't crying I'd be okay and if they were who knows what I would do and but they were they were loving this baby and loving the babies in there and interacting with them and and just finding joy and delight in in that that interaction and that's really a way for our adults and our volunteers to model the love that God has for for those babies and and from there they move into the preschool which is age three through five and this is what kind of where we we begin a little more of our what we probably would say our formal teaching and there's some core truths that we want kids to walk away with when they're done in the preschool environment we want them to know that God made me that God loves me that Jesus wants to be my friend forever and so all the teaching that we do builds on those three things and and you know from there the the they they move into the the school age elementary age and so it's our K through fourth grade environment and we there we build on those core truths that they learned in preschool and we talk about we want them to know that I can have a relationship with God because of Jesus we want them to know that I can trust God no matter what I want to know that you know that I need to make the wise choice and that I should treat others the way I want to be treated and so you know we build on that foundation that they got in preschool in K through fourth and then they move on to 56 which is our fifth and sixth grade ministry and fifth and sixth 56 meets during during second hour during our second service and down at the chapel building in our student venue and we we bust those or take a van and we take the students down there every week to to a really great environment for them to to learn and to grow and the other ministries that I've described so far they all are offered both services every Sunday morning and so in 56 we're continuing to build on the core truths that they've learned in preschool and then K through fourth and we want them to know these things we have to know that my relationship with God affects every area of my life and begin to to understand and wrestle with what that looks like and we want them to understand that the Bible gives me guidance for my life and that I'm responsible for my choices and the consequences both good and bad that come with them and we want them to see that I need to see others needs and begin to move towards them to take action to help meet those and so the from there they move on to our our middle school and high school environments and flip side is our middle school environment it meets on Sunday nights from six to eight down at the student venue and C3 is our high school environment that meets on Wednesday nights from seven to nine in the student venue as well and and as they go through their middle school and high school years we want them to really begin to grab these truths that I am created to pursue an authentic relationship with my creator and that I belong to Jesus and I define who I am by what he says and not by what the world or what others around me say and we want them to to grasp and to to wrestle with the you know the fact that I exist every day to demonstrate God's love to a broken world and so all these environments are are building on each other and all aligned with the same end in mind all working towards helping students and helping kids to develop and to wrestle with and authentic faith and and you know another piece of that alignment that that we've talked about that we've worked on is really being aligned in our approach to presenting and communicating these core truths and we believe these core truths and and any truth that is taught are best understood and and applied in the context of relationship and so we use a large group and small group model in all of our environments from kindergarten all the way up and we you know we teach truth in a large group setting and then we use small group activity especially as they're younger and discussion as they get older to help them to think about and to wrestle with you know how do we live this truth out in our lives and why is it important in my life to know and to understand this and and and to help take the knowledge that is important but to help it to really connect to their life and become action and become life change in their lives and it's really what we do here on an adult level too we have our Sunday morning services where we where we do a lot of teaching and proclamation that way but we also want you being connected in small groups as well to to wrestle through the things of life and how that truth connects and engages with your life and you know in the the kid and student ministry our small group leaders are such a key part of helping to do this in the lives of kids and students and you know our small group leaders are not just there to to provide adult oversight you know to kind of just keep on eye on kids while they're there they are committed volunteers who show up regularly in the lives of kids and students over an extended period of time to help them develop an authentic faith and you know there's someone who knows their name and who knows their interests and who who interacts with them about their successes and their failures who who in age appropriate ways kind of is able to walk through life with them and helps them to to intersect the truth and what's happening in their lives and you know they do that in their ministry environments and and even finding ways outside of of those to stay connected and to stay involved in their lives and in fact this weekend one of our one of our high school our c3 small group leaders is a way a few hours away in a cabin at a cabin with with some of his guys not his whole group unfortunately but with a you know part of his guys and he also took with him a former leader who was a small group leader previously for the same guys and they're they're there at that cabin this weekend just you know building memories and deepening their relationship and and these loving adults are pouring into these students and we really believe in the family ministry here so you can see that we have a great potential to impact the next generation and to help them to develop an authentic faith and that's something we take really really seriously we work really hard to create safe and engaging in age appropriate environments that help them to connect God's truth to their lives and that the truth that is best understood and best fleshed out in the context of relationships in fact recently I heard that truth kind of or someone say kind of in this way that the best way for a child or for a student to know God is to know someone who knows God and that through that relationship that truth is passed on and understood and and grasp in their lives and you know as important as what we do in the family ministry is to us we also understand that we we have a limited ability to impact the next generation and here's what I mean by that as a church in the environments that we have set up for kids and students on average we have about 50 hours a year to influence kids and students here at CCC and I had this you know this jar with marbles in it to kind of represent that it this jar is kind of the bottom couple layers is filled with 50 marbles and not a super huge jar and it's about a quarter of the way full and that represents really the amount of influence that we have in hours per year in a kid or a student's life now if you have a a student in our student ministry and they regularly attend and they participate in you know several of our activities and in the retreats and the summer opportunities that we offer we might be able to to double that number maybe we get 80 to 100 hours but you know no matter what that number is it's limited in the amount of influence that we can have in the life of a child or a student and you can see that those marbles don't even come close to filling that small little jar you know we believe it's powerful we believe our influence is important but we also know and understand that it is limited and that really leads us to the second major difference of a family ministry approach that that makes it different from what we've done in the past and that is the the piece about intentionally partnering with families and if you've been around CCC very long you know it's very likely that you've heard John or myself say that parents have the most potential to influence the lives of kids their kids and students and you know when we say you know parents we're really talking about those who have the responsibility to be the the primary caregivers of kids and students and we understand that sometimes that may be a grandparent or sometimes that may be another relative or maybe a single parent or a foster parent or whatever that may look like in a in a particular family but when we talk about parents we're really talking about those who are functioning as the primary caregivers then here's why parents have the most in most potential to influence a child or student because unlike this you know these 50 hours on average that the church has to invest in a child in a given year parents have about 3,000 hours a year with their kids and their students and that really looks like this you see we had the small jar with the 50 hours in it and these are three humongous jars each with a thousand marbles in them and and so you know it really represents this huge potential built within the family simply because of the time and the relationship that's present there between a child and a parent and this is really the way God designed it and God designed the family to be the primary means to pass on an authentic faith to the next generation. Moses talks about this in the the book of Deuteronomy and you know Moses Deuteronomy chapter 6 was kind of near the end of his life and Joshua was soon lead the nation of Israel into the promised land and so in Moses' parting words he reminds them of the importance of passing their faith along to the next generation and and he says this he says here in verse 4 he says here oh Israel the Lord our God the Lord is one love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength these commands that I give to you today are to be on your hearts impress them on your children talk about them when you sit at home when you walk along the road when you lie down and when you get up tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates you know these verses reflect the relationship and the time that families have to influence their kids you know a modern day version of this might read you know talk about God and your child's faith when you sit down at supper or or in the evening when everyone's finally home talk about it when you drive to and from school or to and from practice or to and from wherever it is that you're going talk about it when they're getting ready for school in the morning and talk about it as you as they're heading to bed and as they're crawling under the covers you know find a way just to make it a normal part of everyday life and I don't think that this is meant to be some kind of equation to be followed exactly but I think it's really more of a challenge for us as parents to use our influence wisely to use these three thousand hours to use these this influence that we have in a wise way to engage our kids and students in meaningful conversations about life and about faith and I know some of you are maybe thinking yeah but you don't know how hard that is to do with my kids and you know they don't even want to talk to me and I can't get more than a word or two out of them and you know I do I do understand it I actually struggle with that already with my eight-year-old and I find that hard to believe and I can't imagine what it's going to be like when she's 16 but you know I get it I understand I work with students as well and I know that's not an easy task and it is hard and difficult and frustrating at times and I believe you know a couple other things about parents as they think about this influence I really believe that almost every and I would say every parent here and almost every parent in the world wants to be a better parent and I believe that every parent wants to do more in the lives of their kids and so what if somehow we could you know change by changing our perspective a little bit you know be able to help parents to do that in some small but significant ways what if by combining these two influences together here the influence of the church and the influence of the family instead of looking at them separately what if by combining them we could exponentially increase the influence of both the church and the family in the lives of kids and students what if instead of being two influences that are working separately in a child's life they are two combined influences working together to help develop an authentic faith and that's really what we mean when we're talking about partnering with families finding ways to combine the influence so that the church and the family are working together towards the same end and this is something that we believe in something that we're committed to and an area that that we as ministry leaders are really starting to to talk about it to push into and and we really don't have it all figured out yet but we are convinced of the importance of combining these two influences combining the influence of the church with the influence of the family I said before we don't have this piece all figured out but there are some ways that we have already been trying to do this in the family ministry and one simple way that we can capitalize on the influence of the family is simply queuing parents to continue the conversations that we begin with kids and students on Sundays and Wednesdays all throughout the week and you know this is something that we've been doing for a while and and are continuing to identify better ways to do it and if you have a preschooler here today that's in our preschool environment they're going to get a brand new tool today a place mat and on that place mat it has this month's theme and key verse and it has the the big idea that they're going to be teaching each week on there so as you sit there at mealtime or if you hang it up in their bedroom or whatever you do with that place mat you're able to to go back to that and have a good conversation and you know in in K through fourth each week you parents get handed a parent queue paper that talks about what we discussed that morning so that you can interact with their students and in the student ministry we try to email parent queues out at least each month when we begin a new series and and we do this because we want parents to be able to interact with with their kids beyond the typical you know Sunday morning after church conversations that was so what'd you learn today and you hear from the backseat I don't know something about Jesus or maybe it was God or Moses I don't know something you know and those parent user designed to really help you to ask better questions based on the information that's provided on them so instead of saying what did you learn today to your kid or to your student we we hope that you're able to say hey I see that you learned about creativity today in what ways did God make you creative and that's a much different conversation than what did you learn at church this morning and that's really the the church learning and finding ways to capitalize on the influence of the family and small but I would say in very significant ways in partnering with parents in that way and what if as a church you know we could find more ways to help parents engage their kids and students in in ways that help them to develop an authentic faith and what if the family could begin to capitalize on the influence of the church to be another voice in the life of their child because it's true as it is that parents have the most significant influence in the life of a child or student it is not the only influence that a child or student needs to develop an authentic faith and what if the family could learn to could lean into the influence of the church to be another voice saying the same things as they are in a different way and we know that you know to do that we have to connect parents and small group leaders so that they can be working together and interacting together and and saying the same things to kids and students in the ways that the other can't and this is an area that we've you know we've also been talking about how do we do that as ministry leaders and looking and taking some steps to be able to move forward in that connection between the small group leaders and the parents now what if as a whole church we began to embrace and own the idea that it is all of our responsibility to help the next generation develop an authentic faith there was a study done a few years ago that revealed for a student to leave their high school ministry with an authentic faith they needed around five loving adults outside their parents to be involved in their lives and they needed the adults that that know them and love them and that engages them about their life and their faith and as a family ministry we hope that we can provide you know one or two or if we're really really fortunate maybe we can get three of loving adults connected in your child or student's life but and that's why that that role of small group is so so important to us but the reality is that still leaves a hole that means there's still a need for more adults in their lives and that is where those of you who may be tempted to have checked out this morning because you don't have kids or you don't volunteer in the family ministry that's where you guys come in and what if you could become that third or fourth or fifth loving adult in a child or student's life and you can have an influence in their life simply by deciding to intentionally engage the same student or the same kid every time you see them here on a Sunday morning and think of the impact that is possible if every single one of us began to think a little more this way and let me give you a simple illustration of what this looks like as we wrap up you know maybe this is probably the best explanation that I've heard from others about this idea of combining the influence of the family and the church then we can we can explain it this way by using the color orange and if you know much about the color palette and and maybe have a more artistic side than I do you probably know that orange is a secondary color and you get orange by mixing two primary colors red and yellow and when you take those two bright colors and you combine them you get something brand new something different something bold and vivid you get the color orange and when you think about the colors red and yellow that are that are combining to make orange think about red is representing the the love the heart the care of a family and think of the yellow is the light of the world or the church and these are both important influences in the life of a child or student and when we can combine those two influences instead of the family just painting in red over here and the church just painting in yellow over here if we can somehow combine those two we get something new we get something beautiful we get something powerful in the life of children and students and and when we think orange we give a child or student the best opportunity to develop an authentic faith and this is a responsibility that every single one of us has that every single one of us shares you see back in Deuteronomy chapter 6 when Moses was giving those instructions he wasn't just talking to parents see in that culture it was more of a communal or tribal society much more so than the more individualistic culture or society that we live in here today and and it it was understood that this was a role of the family and the extended family who lived with them usually but also the whole community that lived together and so yes you know the family ministry and the parents we want to think orange but as a whole church I think we all need to start to think orange as well and so as a reminder for each and every one of us of what we've kind of talked about and to remind us to to think orange and think of our involvement in in helping the next generation to develop an authentic faith I've asked the ushers to pass out to each and every one of you an orange rubber band that looks like this and they are latex free if anyone has any allergies but you know I want you to take that orange rubber band I want you to put it on your wrist like I do or if you don't like doing that you could you know use it as a bookmark around the binding binding of your bible and maybe put a put market Deuteronomy 6 right there or or hang up from your rearview mirror wherever you're gonna see that several times throughout this week and every time that you see that rubber band I want you to stop and I want you to think about the next generation and I want you to think about combining the influences of of the family and the church to to make orange and I want you to ask God how he wants you to think orange and to engage in the next generation and so parents as you see this rubber band throughout the week first of all when you see that let me I hope it just reminds you of one thing that I want to say to you and I want to say that you are doing a good job sometimes we as parents don't feel that way and we need to hear that and and if you are engaged with your child or your student in any way and are using this influence that you have in their lives you're doing a good thing and it might not feel like it and you may be painfully aware every time that you mess up in your relationship with them or you don't get it right or you come face to face with your own humanness and your own brokenness but I want you to remember that God doesn't use perfect people there were no perfect parents in the bible even even Jesus's parents forgot him at the temple and you know look at him he turned out all right and you know God is in the business of using broken people to display his love and grace and it's okay to be broken because that's when God has to show up in our life right show up in our brokenness and we need God to to show up in the lives of our kids and students as well so they can get a glimpse of who he is and what he has to offer into their brokenness so God can even use us in our brokenness and in our mistakes so remember you're doing a good job and let me also remind you parents that no matter where your student is on their faith journey there is always hope so this process of developing authentic faith is not easy it's difficult it's muddy it's it's it's hard and it involves wrestling with some pretty big and difficult things in life and faith and sometimes as they wrestle with these things they'll they'll step outside of where we really would like them to be in regards to their faith and and I know personally for me how crushing it is to me when a student walks into my office and he tells me you know that they're decided to walk away from their faith or or I can observe it in in her life and see how her life choices are are showing that she has given up on her faith and walked away from her relationship with God and and and so I know how hard that is really and I can't imagine how difficult that is to watch and to experience that as parents but I know that our God writes bigger and better stories than we can imagine and this may just be one chapter in their story and you know and if they do and when they do move back towards faith their faith will be stronger and more authentic than ever before as a result of their wrestling through that and if we can keep loving adults and parents engaged in their life I think they have a great chance to do that so parents when you see this let it remind you to keep moving towards your child no matter what age they are keep finding ways to connect their life and their faith together and keep leaning into what we're doing here at the church to help you and we'll keep finding better and better ways to do that. I want this rubber band also this orange rubber band to remind those of you that that are our family ministry volunteers first of all I let it remind you that I say thank you and that the parents here say thank you for impacting our kids and students each and every week and and let your rubber band remind you of how important what you do in the life of a child or student is and you're not just filling a spot in a schedule you're not just taking of space you are filling a hole in the life of a child or a student that only you were designed to fill that only God made you to fill in that way no one else can fill that hole the way you can so keep working keep pushing keep engaging even though you may not see the results and even when it seems like you're not making a difference and and let me remind you let this rubber band remind you that over time you have the potential to make a lasting impact in their life and in their faith students you know I want to talk to you I want I want this rubber band to remind you this week of a couple things number one I want it to remind you that you have an active part to play in this process as loving adults and parents move towards you move back towards them you know understand that that they have a vital role to play in your life and the more engaged you are with them and in this process the more potential there is for impact in your life and and also you need to move towards other students as well because you guys need each other in this whole process of wrestling with and developing your faith let me also remind you not just that you have a part in your own story but that you might be involved in the process or have a part in as the loving adult in someone else's story in the lives of younger kids and students and many of you do serve as small group leaders and helpers and and volunteer in our family ministry and I want you to remember that just because you're young doesn't mean you don't have anything to offer to those kids you can speak into a child's life the way that us adults can and they look up to you and they respect you and you your influence on them is great and don't forget that maybe some of you students need to consider if God wants you and ask God if he wants you to get involved in some way and being involved in a child or student's life maybe you need to consider volunteering as well and for everybody else it's here that I haven't mentioned yet you're not off the hook like I said all right when you see this rubber band this week I really want you to ask God how do you want me to think orange how do you want me to be investing in the next generation maybe he wants you to to choose to intentionally invest in a in a child or student maybe it's a grandchild of yours maybe a niece or nephew maybe a neighbor maybe a student that you happen to serve with here side by side at CCC maybe it's just someone you see every week like I mentioned before and you just choose to make it a point to engage them and let me encourage you as you get to know students and as you begin to develop that relationship with them work at really going beyond just the relational component of hey how is your week or or hey did you see that football gamer what did you think about that show last night engage them on matters of the heart and the faith and even even something as simple as asking them can I pray for you about anything this week can have a huge impact and can open conversations that are very very meaningful maybe some of you need to consider volunteering in the family ministry and and we really believe that we have a place for almost everyone who has a desire and a heart to invest in the lives of the next generation and you can consider volunteering in lots of different ways as small group leaders like we described and really intentionally giving yourself pouring into a few kids or students over a period of time or or maybe you're a great communicator and you can you can help us to communicate these awesome truths that they need to know and that they need to wrestle with and and be a large group teacher for us and we have needs for both of those area in both of those areas and in several of our environments maybe you are not feeling like you that's a fit for you but maybe you could drive the van for 56 back and forth between here in the chapel and it gives you an opportunity to to get to know 15 or or 16 or 17 of our fifth and sixth grade students each time that you do that or or maybe you're good at administration or communication or helping plan events or or good with social media we could use help on all those levels as we endeavor and we work to to impact the next generation and to partner with parents in doing that just think of the impact imagine the impact that we can have in the lives of our kids and students if we all learn to think a little more orange and if we all embrace our responsibility to help the next generation develop an authentic faith and if we can learn to do this well it's going to set our church up to have multi-generational impact you know if we learn to do this a little bit better and our kids learn to do it a little bit better than us and their kids do it a little bit better than them then our church won't be a one one generation and done church when we've all seen that before around here right but CCC would then have a legacy that lasts from generation to generation to generation and if that's true and that's unfolding imagine the impact that we can have in our communities we build a reputation as a church that is building a legacy of helping kids and students to know and to love God and to trust him fully and we already hear people who come to CCC because they want a place where their kids want to come back to or where their students can connect with other students from this area in meaningful ways and that's a testament to the work of our ministry leader and volunteers that they put into those environments to make them fun and engaging and impactful each and every week but imagine the the reputation that we can build in our community community and the impact that we can have in others as we work towards this and imagine the difference that we can make in this world as generation after generation of students go from here and around the country and around the world and leave a lasting impact wherever they go we all have a part in helping the next generation to develop an authentic faith and when we do we all have a part in God's great big story that he's writing throughout history so ask yourself this week how does God want you to be involved in impacting the next generation and helping them to develop an authentic faith and how does God want you to think orange