The Zach and Pat Show
The Science of Success: Kory's Journey of Pro MMA, Coaching, Fatherhood (feat. Kory Beck)
(upbeat music) - What is up guys? Welcome back to the Zach and Pat Show. I'm Zach. - I'm Pat. - This is the show about manhood, fatherhood, entrepreneurship and mentality. It takes you to be successful at those things. And we'll probably sprinkle in some helpful real estate advice too because that's what Pat and I do. You know guys, life can be tough. Go through some things and struggle at times. Is it the show to let you know that you're not alone? If you're someone out there going through any things, is it the show for you? (car crash) All right guys, let's talk about something we all need. High quality, comfortable, stylish clothing that actually holds up in real life. Whether you're grinding at work, hitting the gym or just hanging out, the normal brand has you covered. I've been rocking their gear and let me tell you, it's not your average clothing line. They've nailed it perfect with a perfect blend of durability, comfort, style. 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Also, while you're there, use the promo code ZACMPAP for 10% off your purchase. Hey there guys, I really appreciate you checking out the ZACMPAP show, if you can obviously tell, we are a newer podcast, but one way we're really trying to grow the show is trying to get up among the subscribers we have. So, you know, if you're watching the show and you're getting something out of it, we'd really appreciate it. If you could click that subscribe button, that would help us out a ton. Please click that button and not back to the show. We have a very special guest in studio today. He's a friend of mine. He's a pro MMA fighter and coach. The great and powerful, Bory Beck. Welcome to the show. - Yeah, thanks for having me, guys. Great to be here. - Yeah, just going on in. - This is something I've always wanted to ask you. Where did the nickname the scientist come from? - The scientist, okay, so I got it when I was back in college. I was studying science. But ultimately, it came from, just like my approach, my methodology is my systems to training the way I did things, very data-driven. So, oftentimes, I journal about my training sessions, what I did well, what I didn't do so well. My weight cuts are all by the numbers. I could tell you after I get done cutting weight, how much sodium that I'm gonna consume before my fight to make sure that I'm actually rehydrating and refueling appropriately. So, really just came from my approach and the way I did things. And everybody kind of just noticed that. And because I was studying science in college and now I'm an engineer, it just kind of fit. Became scientists and it's been that way ever since, so. - That's pretty cool. It's a cool nickname. But I'm sure there's a lot of doing it that way. I mean, having the data and the science behind that, I'm sure that makes it more efficient and just better for athletes. Having that data when it comes to one, cutting weight and how to get back, rehydrating your body in a quick manner and things like that and preparing for a fight. I'm sure having that data is huge. - Yeah, it makes a massive difference. And I think we're seeing that over the course of the last five to 10 years, like how MMA has kind of changed in that aspect because you look back at old school MMA, archaic weight cutting methods, everything else like that and how things have changed a lot now. And just like anything, everything kind of starts on the coast and works its way in. And I've always kind of been on top of the data-driven stuff and really more recently started seeing where there's a big gap still, especially from like amateur to pro and the methods as far as training, cutting weight, the nutrition behind things. And I've really just, not just for myself, but for other people, start trying to like feel that gap. I mean, it's become something that I've kind of fallen into naturally, you know, as a coach and starting to help people with their nutrition, with their weight cuts and things like that because it makes a massive difference, you know, when you're not just when you're talking about performing in the cage, performing in the gym, whatever it is, when you talk about performing in life, like just as a business owner, you know, and I talk to coworkers that work about this too, like, hey, like if you feel properly, if you get the right sleep, if you take the right supplements, you do the right things, like you're gonna feel way different. Your mind's gonna operate way different. Your body's gonna operate way different. That's ultimately gonna help you perform better in whatever it is that you wanna do. And yeah, like not everybody likes the numbers. Okay, you know, it doesn't always have to be that way. You don't have to track every macro. You, you know, intake, your protein, your carb, if that's whatever it is, doesn't have to be that complicated. But if you're willing to do that, you're willing to collect that data, makes it that much easier. Or if you're at least willing to eat certain things, do certain things and then give me that data, I can run the number for it. I'll happily do that. And then we can use that to make improvements. 'Cause the thing is if you're not collecting data, whether you're reflecting on your training sessions, whether it's like going into your nutrition, whether it's your mindset even, if you're not collecting that data and using that to reflect and improve, then you're just guessing, you know what I'm saying? Like we're trying to take the guesswork out of whatever it is, we're trying to improve and we're trying to develop like an actual system, an actual path forward to get there. We're not just like taking shots in the dark here and just going about our days and training, just however, like you might make improvements, but you might not. And when you start actually tracking those things, reflecting on your experiences, that's how you can now move yourself forward in whatever it is you wanna do. - Yeah, I feel like so many fighters, I mean, I correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel like there's probably a lot of guys out there just fucking thing in it. - Yeah, and you see that a lot, like guys all the way up to the highest levels of the UFC, like one example, Marab, okay? Great, incredible fighters, he doesn't miss weight and he has his way of doing things, but he doesn't eat for like three days before weigh-ins. - Jesus. - And you know, while that might be effective, might help him make the weight. It's not necessary and it makes you wonder, okay, like what is that absolute lack of calories in those last 72 hours leading up to the fight, doing to his performance, like the impact might be small. And obviously he's got an incredible gas tank, so you know, why change something that's working, but just like an example of that, like if you're, maybe if you don't have that type of gas tank, you don't wanna not eat for three days just to make weight when you could use other strategies to where you can eat. And like enjoy some food throughout the fight camp and still make weight in a healthy way and perform even better. - Maybe that's why he's so good, he gets that extra level 'cause he's hangry. (laughing) - Maybe, I think he's just built differently. And he just, his work ethic is next level, so you know, that makes a huge difference too. - Sure, well, for the people that don't know, tell us a little bit about yourself. - Oh man, a lot of things, like you said, you know, I'm a fighter, I'm a coach. I've been fighting for over 10 years now, probably training close to 14. I am a dad, I have an awesome six-year-old son, and I work as an engineer, you know, work different hours and stuff, so it gives me time throughout the week. I'm really just, I'm just an average dude that loves to learn, loves to help other people, and just loves to continue just improving myself, and, you know what, it hasn't always been that way, but I've really found what works for me and how to make myself better and in turn, make people around me better, and you know, just live in life with a purpose. That's what I try to do. - So you're an engineer at Nike? - Yeah, engineer at Nike, so, you know, be careful what I say here with all the NDAs and all that kind of stuff, but yeah, we have a manufacturing plant in St. Charles, one in Beaverton, Oregon, where we just make the airbags that go in the shoes, so that's it, we make the airbags, but we make it in a process that is totally Nike, no other company does it that way, and yeah, I'm a quality engineer, so essentially, make sure that it's good, make sure that what we make is, you know, gonna pass all the testing. - Just the pieces that go in the ear maxes and all that? - Like the air maxes, all that, those airbags that go in the heel of the shoe. - Okay. - Yeah, that's what we make. Granted, we do make external products and things like that, where, you know, this is kind of like a historical thing at the plant and other stuff, and I'm not gonna talk about the specifics there, but we make other things that are really cool and that, you know, have a big impact on, you know, the society as a whole that most people don't even know. - So not just Nike's clothing brands or shoes or something? - You make some external products for external customers, and yeah, it's really cool why I look at stuff under microscopes, you know, I do different lab testing things, I run the numbers and just make sure things are good, and I would say I'm basically like a material investigator. Like if something is used incorrectly or we don't know what it is, because, you know, manufacturing is a complicated process, right? Then it's up to me and my team to figure out what are we gonna do with that? How are we gonna use it in a way that we're not wasting money? And, you know, what impacts is this gonna have on any of the products and stuff like that? So it's fun. It allows me to use a different side of my brain that I, you know, don't often use in my everyday life. And I get to, I work 14-hour shifts Thursday through Sunday, so I still have Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, you know, train coach and do all the stuff, get plenty of PTO, so whenever it comes to getting off for fights on the weekends, if I got to travel in the corner, it's not an issue. And ultimately like, you know, Nike is a athletic brand and I'm an athlete, so it seems to fit. - Yeah, dude, that sounds like the scientist part. - Yeah, yeah, it had all fits, man. - Yeah. - So where did your, I believe we were down at Missouri State, I think at the same time. - Yeah, probably. - Oh, well, the more Missouri State, yeah, I was thinking. - Yeah, I must say, is that where you're, is that where you kind of started training martial arts or? - It's not where I started training martial arts, it's where I started my fight career. So. - Let's start from the beginning. - Yeah, I don't worry at all. - How did I get into it? Yeah. I was probably 13, 14 years old and I was, I remember like watching UFC and really a big thing. I remember going to one of my buddy's house and, you know, at that time he had, when fights were still on cable and stuff, he had all the good sports champion, you know? So I remember staying up real late and watching like the WEC, Uriah Faber and those kind of guys. And I was like, man, this is like incredible. And my dad brought home a Gracie DVD that one of his friends gave him at work. And I, you know, popped it in, DVD player. Those probably don't even exist anymore, but anyways, and started watching it. And, you know, obviously I'm a smaller guy. I've always been a smaller guy, but I've always been an athlete, played sports my whole life. And I was always pretty good. What size was sometimes a limiting factor. And I just really fell in love with the Jiu Jitsu Promise. Like you can, no matter how big you are, no matter how small you are, if you know this art, you can apply it in the right way and it'll be effective. I fell in love with the Jiu Jitsu Promise. I was watching MMA on TV. And I was just like, man, I gotta do that. Like I'm a small guy. Like there's weight classes. Like I gotta get into that. Like maybe that's my thing. Cause as a hockey player growing up and, you know, I always wanted to go to the NHL like anybody does, right? And I planned on going the most and playing hockey. And ultimately got to the point where I met with some recruiters and they were like, yeah, man, I don't know if you know this, but you're not six foot tall. And we don't recruit goalies that are under six foot tall. I was like, well, yeah, I should've known that. And then I was like, I don't, I probably haven't played since college. I would love to get back out there and do something like that. But anyway, so I started training when I was in high school on and off. I wrestled one year in high school and really just trained in the off-season hockey. Cause like I said, hockey was my big thing. And then it was the summer where I was going to college. I was training at Finney's. I told Jesse Finney, I was like, Hey man, like I'm going to fight, but I wasn't 18 yet. So I had a young birthday and all that. And he was like, okay, well, if you start coming to these practices, then maybe we can get you a fight before you go off to school. That didn't happen, but I did start training with the pros and all that. And I remember being, you know, buck 25, soak in wet and just getting my butt kicked every single day. And anyways, I ended up going to college. I found a gym in Springfield, uh, team fusion, uh, under Brad Montgomery. And I had my very first fight, I think in November, um, shortly after, like right when you got down to school. Yeah. And it was, it was actually really cool. Cause I was rushing a fraternity at the time, Pike. And, um, we did this thing where basically I, I was essentially a matchmaker for my very first fight. Cause the promoter, it was, it fell into place perfectly. There was a local promoter that was looking to get the viewership from the college campus. And he just didn't know like how to get it out there. And I was like, whoa, I'm, I go to college here, I'm in a fraternity and I want to fight. I'm like the perfect candidate for this. I saw it on some like thread somewhere at, I don't know if it was Reddit or whatever. And then like I messaged this girl who knew him and she got me connected. I went and talked to him about it and he was like, I was like, yeah, I have an idea. Like, what if I fought somebody in another fraternity and then even further, what if, what if we made it to where the ticket sales from these, the fight, the winner gets the ticket sales and gets to donate them to their philanthropy event. I was like, well, let's do it. I remember this. Yeah. So I didn't go. I walked door to door to fraternity houses saying like, Hey, do you have anybody that would be interested in like training for, you know, a period of time where has trained before that's around this type of weight. And eventually found somebody who was formerly in the military had some type of, um, you know, background and some grappling and they were like, yeah, cool, let's do it. So basically I trained a team fusion, this guy trained at Springfield Fight Club. Um, I want to say for like six months, and then we fought. And that was my very first amateur MMA fight and then it just kind of went from there. So interesting little, uh, you know, way to make it happen. And I was in November of 2014. Yeah. So what's your, what's your fraternity do with the, with the winning money? Um, we, what was our philanthropy event at the time? I think it was, um, had something to do. Gosh, they'd kick me if I, if they knew that I forgot this, but, uh, we had a, we had a pike fire truck. So it was something to do with like the fire, fire department and burn victim and things like that. Um, but yeah, we donated probably close to $2,500, um, from the ticket sales and all that. So those are cool little, little thing. Now, did you do, or was that the only one or did they make that a, that was the only one that we did that way. Um, but yeah, then I just kept fighting from there and I hadn't 11 amateur fights and then, um, eventually went pro in 2019. Yeah. Yeah. I was still fighting today. Uh, yeah, I mean, I had a fight, um, last September. So it's been a minute since then, um, I don't have any fights currently scheduled. Um, you know, so not, I'm not actively looking for fights right now. I've had some issues with some concussions in the past, uh, some issues with my neck and stuff like that. So just kind of trying to get that sorted out and I've, you know, fallen into this, not falling into it, but, um, you know, I started coaching several years ago and it's just become more and more now, uh, we have a lot of amateur fighters at the gym and I'm, you know, cornering and coaching and all that kind of stuff. So my role has changed a little bit and you know, I'm just not, uh, I haven't been looking for a fight, you know, it's not to say that I'm not going to fight, but, uh, I don't have anything scheduled at the moment. So we'll, we'll see what the future holds in that area, but yeah, I'm still fighting. Damn. You got your fighter, coach, engineer, dad, how do you juggle it all? What's the structure to your life like? Ooh, a chaos. They're not burning out. It's just absolute chaos. Uh, but no, for real, it, I think it really is just like a mentality thing and finding what works for me. And that's like, um, just structuring my days, like planning things out, um, having routine, making a lot of sacrifices. I think a lot of people don't realize that when you want to do something that's bigger than yourself, it comes with making those sacrifices and making the choice to choose this thing over that thing. And, um, yeah, it's, uh, knowing that, okay, just really embodying the characteristics of, of a fighter and like what I think to be a man, um, being resilient, being disciplined, um, being driven and most importantly, knowing why because if you don't know why you're going to do something, then there, there's nothing that's going to drive you more than that. And, um, just really sitting down, looking, laying everything out and saying, what do I want to do? What do I have to do to get there and what things do I have to let go of in order to do those things, setting those goals, setting your priorities and taking daily action over and over and over again, um, you know, whether you want to, whether you want to wake up or not have to, you know, whether you want to work out or not. You have to. And actually that's wrong. I shouldn't say you have to because you get to. That's the, that's another piece of this is the gratitude. When you see that you might be feeling overwhelmed, you're feeling like life is chaotic and all of this kind of stuff, like it can, you can look at it as an obligation or you can look at it as an opportunity. And that comes back to understanding that, Hey, yes, I'm struggling. I have a ton of obstacles in my way. I have so many things that I have to manage, so many things that I have to balance. But all of these things gives me opportunities to be my best self, to be a better man, to be a better father, be a better fighter, and to be an example to my son and the people around me and to be to step into that role, take the action to lead by example and do it with a grateful heart where you can look and see the opportunities that all of these things present to you. And afterwards look back and understand like, wow, I'm really glad that I didn't just, you know, give up on that and take a step back and do what was comfortable. Because if you're uncomfortable, most of the time that means that you're actually on the right path. I think sometimes a lot of people just start to feel uncomfortable in life and they'll be like, man, maybe I'm off course. I think it's the opposite. I think when you are uncomfortable, that's when you know on the right path. Because you're having to face the obstacles, you're having to do the difficult things that are ultimately going to propel you forward and make you a better person. Uncomfortable parts, that's where you grow. Yeah, absolutely. And when you're working out, you're not growing your muscles, you break, you're breaking them down. So when they grow bigger, you know, it's where we grow when it's uncomfortable. But, you know, mental, or fighting is as mental as it is physical. Yeah. I mean, what would you say is like one of the biggest mental battles you've had to overcome inside or outside the cage? Um, man, that's tough. I would say, let's start with this. Inside the cage, I think a lot of people think that as a fighter, you're just, you know, you have resilience and you're going to just do whatever it takes to win. And if you've trained that, if you've built that, if you have that mentality, yes, most of the time you will, however, you're always going to be faced with that question of, do I want to quit? Do I want to get out of here? No matter, no matter how mentally tough you are, no matter how strong you are, no matter how good you are, if you're getting blasted in the face, if you're, you know, flash knocked out, if you're in a bad spot, you have cuts, whatever it is, there will be points where your brain is like, Hey, man, just let it go. Like all you got to do is stop moving and the ref's going to step in and stop it. And the biggest thing is you have to make the choice, you have to make the choice to keep moving forward, to keep going through what you're going through, because you know that if you go through it long enough, if you push hard enough, there's always going to be a way that you can like a path where you can find a way to win, right? Um, so I think ultimately it's just taking that step back and knowing like I'm going to be faced with this question, if I want to quit and I have to make the choice that I want to keep going. And even if you might not see this positive outcome that you, you know, the win or whatever it is, you have to remember that I can find a way to get there, even if you're maybe not better than the guy, even if you're, you know, broken, like it was a time, it was my second professional fight when out it was in Indiana, it was a, you know, main event, and I went out and I won the first round. Everything was going great. Second round comes and he took me down off the cage, landed, and I fractured three of my ribs and I could feel it immediately. And then, you know, I managed to get up and he took me down again in that same shoulder in the same spot. So I have three fractured ribs. My cartilage was torn completely off the bone. Basically the right side of my rib cage isn't connected to my sternum anymore. And because of that, I was struggling because of that I was on the bottom. I'm getting elbowed in the face, you know, like I had massive cuts. I ended up getting massive gas behind my ear over my eye. I'm, you know, bleeding profusely. I can't like I'm struggling to get up and all that. And that was one of those moments that I was telling you about where it's like, hey, man, all you got to do is cover up in the ruffle save you, but you have to make a choice. Like, okay, I don't, I don't want that like I got a, you know, maybe I could have gotten out there out of there with less injuries, but for me, it was like I'd rather not be able to get up and keep moving than just a quip. And you know, you find a way, you find a way I managed to find a way. I even threw up an arm bar at the end of the second round. I couldn't extend it because my ribs were so messed up, but I made it out of the round. And like in between rounds, there's pictures you'll see my, my face is completely bloody like everything. And it was like, okay, I am absolutely battered. I lost that round and I don't have all the tools to try to, to really like go out there and execute a game plan that I wanted to execute in the first place. And I ended up shooting a desperate takedown and getting choked and having to tap. But the point of that story is to say that when you're in those moments, you always have a choice whether you want to keep going, you want to quit and that's up to you. And the more times that you choose to keep going, the more you're reinforcing that choice in your own mind, the more that the easier that it's going to be in the future to make that choice again, right? So whatever it is, if you allow yourself, when you face some uncomfortable, something uncomfortable, you face something difficult and you're like, okay, I'm out. I'm going to stop here, you're reinforcing that you're probably going to stop even sooner next time. But if you, on the other end of things, if you make the choice to keep going, then it'll be easier and easier to make that choice in the future. And you're going to get further and further be able to adjust and adapt to being uncomfortable in those difficult situations. And before you know it, you're, you're starting to build that resilience that you want. And it just becomes a, comes through the habit of making the choice to keep going when you don't want to. That's awesome. You're, you're sitting there with three broken ribs. Well, I mean, is it the adrenaline that's flowing that's kind of keeping that pain away or what? You just putting it out of your mind or you're like, fuck it, this is just going to hurt for a while and I'm just going to do what I can. Adrenaline is a really powerful thing. It's really powerful thing. No, you can, you can absolutely feel it. I think it's really just like the adrenaline makes a big difference. But just the decision of, okay, let's put it this way. I think the shame of giving up on myself is going to be more painful than those broken ribs. Gotcha. That's what it comes down to. And I didn't want to give up on myself. I knew that I can either deal with the pain of giving up or I can deal with the pain of these broken ribs and keep trying. That's what it came down. The broken ribs is temporary. Yeah. I mean, kind of temporary that the broken ribs heal the, the cartilage like these ribs up here, these top two ribs, they connect through cartilage to your sternum. Well that cartilage is torn completely off the bone. So these two ribs are no longer connected to my sternum and they're never going to heal there. That heart is never going to regrow. And you're just like, feel your ribs. Yeah. You could feel it right now. Yeah. I trust you. And like, if I lay on my stomach, I can feel them like on whatever surface it is. Yeah. And then that's just the way that it is and eventually you lose, you know, those nerve endings kind of die and you lose the pain that comes with it. So it's just a weird feeling. Now it's not a painful feeling. Yeah. But yeah, it's just structural damage that never let me go and do the surgery on that or. Oh man. That's a big thing. One of the reasons why I don't really go to see sports doctors anymore because I saw about that. Yeah, I saw about 13 different doctors and they went, you know, they'd refer me to a trauma surgeon, refer me back to North Peter, whatever one guy said he could go in there and put a steel plate in there, whatever. And I was like, I probably don't want that. And long story short, every single one of them pulled me not to fight again. So ultimately I said, okay, I see a doc. I'm probably not going to come back and see you again. And then I spent several years working with Dr. Ian McIntosh at the Health and Performance Center. He's a chiropractor, but more of like a holistic type of approach with, you know, strength and conditioning and that kind of stuff I worked with Sarah and Steve at the fitness dojo to really kind of reposition my body to, you know, and build some muscle mass around that area to keep it a little bit safer. And just doing a lot of like things naturally to try to help it because ultimately I knew that it wasn't going to really like fix itself, but I can kind of work around it and do things that would be beneficial. We took a lot of learning and that's really what got me into a lot of the, you know, deep into the strength and conditioning, the nutrition, that kind of stuff. And you know, I don't have any formal education in that, but I do have a science background and I've probably read more literature on those topics than a lot of people, just because I was dealing with something that I needed to fix and nobody could give me the answers. So I was like, okay, I might as well try to fix this myself. And then I teamed up with some of those people I mentioned and yeah, we've made major progress and it really doesn't, you know, bother me or give me any issues anymore. Unless I get hit directly on it, then, you know, that's, that's a problem, but overall trying to avoid that anyway. Yeah. Trying to avoid that anyway. Yeah. So MMA, like the lower levels is the pay is kind of pretty notoriously bad unless you're obviously like in that at the higher levels, how do you approach managing money while still training at an elite level? That's a tough one. For me, it just means like, I still have a regular job, you know, and that comes from the fact that like I am a dad, so I have like responsibilities and things like that. You see some guys where they're, they're more able to get by on like sponsorship money, like, you know, like finding a cheap place to stay, staying with some other people. And those, those types of guys, they oftentimes have a really great like support system. And I mean, I have a really great support system as it is, but you have to find a way to build, you know, a group of people around your support system around you to help elevate you to where you want to go. And if they're not willing to make like financial investments in you to help you get to the next level, then you have to find a way to do that yourself. And that means probably having a regular job, which means when you have a regular job, you have to, you know, train before or afterwards, sometimes both find a way to get a run in on your lunch break, maybe. And it just means your schedule is going to be packed. So then it goes back to that whole thing of like, Hey, you got to manage your time. You got to manage your priorities. You got to know like, okay, maybe I have to take a day off of work this day. So I can go and spar or go to this seminar, whatever it is. Or it's like, Hey, I might miss this class because I'm working. Where can I fit in another training session? Because if you look at how many training sessions you have over the course of a bike camp, if you miss one here, miss one there, miss one here, like they all add up. So you have to find a way to just get it in, whatever it is. And then you add in injuries and stuff like that, you, there's always going to be an excuse. There's always going to be an excuse not to train not to do this, not to do that. You have to find a way to adapt to that. And I think that's why MMA fighters are so good at adapting to obstacles in general, you know, it goes back to that mindset thing because you realize that you're never going to be 100%. There's always going to be something that is hurting, something that is injured. You know, you're working a job, some type of obstacle, and you have to find a way around it. Like maybe you can't, you know, grapple today, or you can't do it hard. Like maybe you just drill or maybe your shoulders messed up. So you just work on punching off your other side or you work on your footwork or maybe you're right, you know, riding a bike to get some cardio, like there's always something you can do. And I think that translates to anything in life, right? Like there's always some excuse you can make, some excuse you can have. There's also always something you can do, even if it's not ideal, even if it's not something, not the best way or not what you wanted to do, you're still something you can do. And you have to find a way to do that, you have to find a way to get things in, to schedule your training and to have the priorities and going back to what I said before is knowing your why. Like why are you doing this? Why do you want to do this? And when you know that, then that's going to drive you to wake up before work and go on that run, get that early training session in, go to the gym afterwards and train hard and then let's say you had a morning session, you worked all day, you had an evening session, two evening sessions, and now you're like, okay, I'm getting closer to the end of my camp. I need a little extra cardio or whatever it is, like, do you have that why to lace up your shoes and hit the road after working and training for 14 hours? Like you got to make that choice, you know, and that goes back to making the choice to do it. Because if you get close to the fight and you realize you need confidence, right? Everybody needs confidence when you're going into a fight. Best way to have confidence is to stack the proof. Pack and proof means you're doing what you need to do to be best prepared to get there. Well when you look back and you realize like, damn, skip that session, I didn't lace up those shoes and hit the road, like that confidence isn't going to be there. So when you realize that your performance in the cage is going to be impacted by all of those things, then like I said, it becomes easier and easier to make the choice. The more times you make that choice to do that difficult thing, the easier it is. You're just building momentum. You act on inspiration first, build momentum. As you build momentum, you make habits. As your habits get dialed in, you make, you create discipline. Once you're disciplined, then that's really what it takes to achieve your goals in the cage or your goals outside of the cage. It really doesn't matter. It's a simple process. Talk a lot about, you mentioned being a dad, you know, you typically see, I know I'm one of these for a while, but that's typically lose their edge when they have kids. How's being a father change the way you train and fight? Yeah, that's a great question. I think, again, it's a mentality thing. I told myself whenever I became a father that I wasn't going to let it limit me from doing any of the things I wanted to do in life. And I think that came from being a father early on, because you see a lot of dads that like they do all, they do all the fun stuff, all the cool stuff in their twenties, right? And then they have kids in their thirties and they're like, okay, I'm going to settle down. And they kind of accept that like, Hey, these big aspirations, these big goals, yeah, I don't really need them anymore. I'm going to focus on being a dad, which is great. Don't get me wrong. I have absolutely nothing against that. But I became father at 23. I knew that I still had big goals, big dreams, big aspirations. Whether it was going to the UFC or not. And I knew that I wasn't going to let having a child limit me from doing the things that I need to do. And I also knew that I wasn't going to let the things I do limit me from being a good dad. So then it was like, okay, how do I balance this? And ultimately it comes down to as a dad. Now you have a greater why because you have a child, not only do you want to provide for them, not only do you want to do the right things, but you're also leading by example, your kids are always watching, you know, whether they can talk or not, whether they tell you that they see what you're doing or not, they're always watching. And if you lead by example, and you do the right things you put in the work, you make sure you still have time for them, and you do all of that, then being a dad is actually like a superpower when it comes to being an athlete and being a fighter. And it really just depends on how you look at it, because you can look at it like, okay, I'm a dad now, I don't have as much time, I don't have as much, you know, energy, whatever it is like you sleepless nights, man, that's tough, you know, the thing about waking up and training and trying to work out and do all those things, sleeping, you know, when you have a newborn or whatever it is, like you find a way, and there's sometimes where you do make some sacrifices, you maybe don't train as much or whatever it is, and that's okay, you have to find a way to still be prepared. And nothing's going to be perfect. You have to focus on progress, not the perfection, and whether it's, you know, whether you're an athlete and a dad, whether you're just a dad, whatever it is, I think that that applies to like you're never going to be a perfect dad, you're never going to be a perfect athlete, you're definitely not going to be perfect if you're trying to be both, but you can always try to improve, you can always try to be better, and like you've got to take a step back and like really understand where you're at to even know where you need to be. Yeah, great. Yeah, I mean, because I know for me, like, I mean, our kids see everything, so what is it that I want them to see? Yeah. I want them to see me working hard, I want to see them to see me training, doing things to get better, stronger, faster, better at my job, things like that, because that's just, you know, they're going to see that and translate that into their lives. Yeah, exactly. Monkey see monkey, when your kids see you doing those, like, if you want your child to be a certain way, do it better be that way, because they're going to do exactly what you do. Yeah. And I'm really experiencing that now with my three year old or he's almost three, but he just, I mean, he just repeats everything you say, like, this morning, like I stubbed my toe and I go, Oh, fuck, and he goes, Daddy, why'd you say, Oh, fuck. And I'm like, Oh, my God, you know, wait till he starts mimicking your actions. Like my boys are five and six. And so I take him out of the gym and like when I'm go get like walking on the treadmill, they're hopping on the treadmill, walking or on the elliptical or taking them to crossfit. It's fun because our crossfit gym is awesome. Rachel and them do a great job with Rachel, put them through like, Oh, many body weight workout. Yeah. Yeah. Our muscles are getting big bad. Yeah. Yeah. That's great. Well, Corey, you, you coach a lot of fighters. What, uh, what separates the ones who have success from the ones who don't? I think when you break down fighters, there, there's some guys that are really talented guys and girls, I should say some that are really talented. Some that have a lot of, you know, work ethic are really tough and some that are a little bit of both. And I think the ones that really seem to excel are the ones that don't make excuses. They show up to training. They show up to training consistently. Um, they're willing to fight often. That's a mistake that I made when I was, you know, coming up as I didn't fight as often as I should have. Um, but yeah, don't make excuses, show up and train consistently. And really just have that, that mentality that I'm always going to be learning and trying to get better, like almost like a student of the game for forever, wipe out mentality. Exactly. Because you can't, you can't think that you know everything, you know, and, and you have to be willing to listen, learn, adjust, adapt, and be consistent, not make excuses. I know that might seem like a lot of things, but, uh, ultimately, like those, though, in my opinion, those are the things that, that make you the best athlete that you can be. I completely I'm not shocked by that. Yeah. That wipe out mentality. Like I've heard you talk about it on here before, like makes a huge difference. Like, it's being able to step back and learn from whoever, whoever it is that's teaching you, like, you know, I'm, I'm a Bronbo and Jujitsu and I still learn, like I can watch other people do things and, and ask a question. And it's not to say that maybe I, it's not that I don't know that move or, but I want to know like, Hey, like, why'd you do it that way? Like, why'd you do it that way? Not this way. Then like when they can explain it, then it gets you thinking like, okay, like let me try that. Or like, why do I do it this way or not that way and start to reinforce that again, going back to that why if you understand why you're doing something, it's a lot easier to find the best way to do it. And yeah, just always being a student of the game, never stopping being, you know, coachable, taking instruction, but also not just blindly following certain, you know, I think at the end of the, at the end of the day, just like with kids, like you have to make sure that they're still willing to push back when it's necessary to push back, you know, like, okay, like you want me to do this? Like, why do you want me to do this? Because if it doesn't make sense to me, why should I do it? Yeah. I think the greatest question that you can ever ask is why. Yeah. Like there's no better question than why about anything. Yeah. Well, this is a big, why guy right now. Why? Why do I need to put on my show? Yeah. Try to learn. Because we're leaving the house. Yeah. Oh, I do have to put on a sweatshirt. Yeah. Because it's 30 degrees. Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Everything's why right now. Yeah. Gotta make it make sense for him. Yeah. Make it make sense. That's a great, a great thing. Everything. Make it make sense. Yeah. Why does it get dark outside? Oh, here we go. Like, you know, like. Well, the Earth orbit. Yeah. Because it means it's time to go to sleep. You know, like, you know, I start to explain. I'm like, yeah, like that's going to go away over there. That's just going to open up a whole other envelope of questions that I don't know. I don't have sufficient answers for. My dad's answer was always physics. Yeah. Why? Physics. Well, why? Physics. Yeah. All right. Cool. I gotta learn physics. Yeah. Well, we've covered a lot about the mindset of stuff that actually works. There's a lot of woo-woo bullshit and self-improvement. What's some of that total bullshit out that are things that are out there that are said about, you know, mental, you know, the mental side of things that's just total bullshit? Um, opinion here, but I think the, it's a positive, the positive mindset thing. Sometimes bullshit. And I say that because it's real easy to just like, stay positive, positivity doesn't get you shit. You know, like, okay, like, yeah, it's good to be positive, but it's not, we're not looking at something of like, how can I be positive here? It's how can, how is this productive? Does that make sense? It's like when you have a thought, it's not thinking, oh, I need to make that a positive thought. It's like, no, it's looking at the thought you had and thinking, how can I make this a productive? And where does this opportunity cause if we're, if we're just trying to be positive all the time, and we're just like, okay, this, this isn't bad. This is good. It's like, well, that doesn't mean shit. There's no substance to that. It's like, okay, let me be able to reframe my thinking in a way that is productive and serves me and comes from gratitude and sees opportunities. That is ultimately kind of the framework you need to create in your mind. Not just like, oh, that's be positive. Yeah. So yeah, simple answer on that one. Man, the positivity movement, like, and sometimes from being completely honest, like people always like, I'll be nice to yourself, like you got to show yourself grades, be nice to yourself. No, sometimes, sometimes the best answer is to be like, Hey man, like what the fuck are you doing? Yeah. Like take a step back, get your shit together and start doing the right things. Like you have to have those hard conversations with yourself. And that's not positive. You know, it's sometimes it's negative, but it's being real, being real, being honest. And that is where you can actually see, okay, how do I move through this? How do I change my mind to be productive? Not just see the positive. I don't care about positive. That's why I like to work into enthusiastic because it adds that productivity side to the positive. Yeah. Yeah. You're, you're excited to do something. Right. You can be positive about it. That doesn't mean you want to do it. Enthusiasm to it. Now you're excited to do it. Yeah. So, and just like looking at it, that's a great thing. So if we talk about like being grateful, right, like we talk about like, if you want to set yourself up to have a good mindset going into things, it's not just about being positive. It's about beforehand being intentional with the way you think about it. So like, if I want to set myself up to enjoy training today, even if I'm, maybe I wake up and I'm dreading it, but I want to make sure that I enjoy it. So I do well. I take a step back and say, okay, like, what am I excited about to go train? And it's not just being excited to be there, whatever. It's like looking at it in a productive way or what opportunities does it give me? You know, like, okay, it gives me an opportunity to see a lot of my friends. It gives me an opportunity to push myself. It gives me an opportunity to stay true to the pillars that I want, you know, to embody. And it gives me the opportunity to actually do something that's uncomfortable. And then you look at it and you're like, okay, I have these opportunities. And I framed it that way because I want to be intentional about how I go into this training session and that intention ultimately helps you take action to improve. And then you're not just writing the training session anymore. You have something to look forward to. And it's not because you're being positive, it's because you're seeing the productivity that comes from it. And I'm not talking about productivity as far as like doing more, you know, it's not that big old woohoo thing. It's like, how is this serving? Well, it goes back to like two quality over quantity. Yeah. So make sure you're in the quality reps and but you're intentional about the quality of what you're doing. Right. And you're going to be more product and you're going to have better productivity doing it that way than if you just do ref ref ref ref ref ref ref ref ref ref ref ref. It's like when you when you think about gold, right, like probably a big gold guy and you want to have smart, right, one things that are measurable. It's like, okay, if I set intentions before I go train and we're using training and stuff because I'm a fighter, right, but this applies to anything, right? You set intentions beforehand and you're like, okay, what do I want to get out of this session? What am I going to do to get that outcome? And how can I actually measure that? And it goes back to the data thing like, okay, like I want to be more resilient. I want to build my cardio and I want to, you know, practice these things to make sure that I don't give up in the fight. Okay. That's great. How am I actually going to do that? Well, when I'm sparring, when I start to feel tired, that is my opportunity to shoot a takedown to move forward. Okay. That's great. How many takedowns do I want to get each round? Like, I want to get three takedowns each round, elite or attempt to get three takedowns each round. And then you look back and you're like, okay, how well did I do? Well, I got tired and I didn't make the choice to go for that takedown. Now that's a measurable thing. I only, I only went for two takedown. So tomorrow, how am I going to improve next time? I'm going to say, okay, again, I'm going for three takedown. Now when I, when I'm presented with the choice of whether I want to push through being tired, I'm going to make that choice to go for that other takedown. Maybe it puts me in a bad spot. Maybe it gets me, you know, choked out, whatever it is, but it doesn't matter because ultimately your goal there was to push yourself through that barrier that you created because you're tired and to improve your cardio, to improve your resilience and improve your ability to adapt and move forward. And you did that. So it doesn't really matter that you got choked out because you went for a take on your gas. It matters that you achieved the desired outcome that you wanted and were able to measure it, improve on it and implement it the next. Set the goals for the things that you can control. Yeah, control. Yeah. So like, you know, the dichotomy of control, right? But you can control what you can't control because this, when you start trying to control things, you can't really control your shoe. It's yeah. And, and like if we want to apply that to fighting again, like, you know, people often fear, like failure, fear losing, you can't control the outcome of a fight, right? But what you can control is how you fight the things you do, what you embody while you're in there. That's why, like, when I look at it, I don't think about beating the other person, I don't think about winning. I think about breaking them because if I can break them, then I'm probably going to win. You know what I'm saying? And how do I break them? It's like, okay, if I can move forward, if I can push harder, if I can, if I'm tired, I know they're tired. And if I'm tired and I can push even further, I know they're going to be even more tired. And then you see that you can see it in their body language and then you're like, okay, one more time. Like, let me like, they just got up after I took them down and that's a big victory for them. Let me take them down again. Make them get up again. Make them get up again. When I get them down, like, let me, you know, they got to cut on their forehead. Let me grind my elbow into their face and make them bleed a little more. I know that sounds brutal, but we're talking about breaking them mentally. And when you break someone mentally, you're more likely to be able to beat them and while you can't control the outcome of winning, you can control the actions you take to break. So I was a baseball player and, you know, fortunate to play at a pretty high level. And everybody talks about how baseball is one of the most mental sports out there. But having getting, having gotten into gypsy, I'm like, fuck that. That is way more mental than baseball. But, you know, having that deep background of baseball, I mean, these are all things that we've learned from playing at, you know, from a very young, like, well, the successful ones, the ones that were able to go on, I was taught from a young age, like, yeah, like you said, control what you can control. But same thing, it's like, I can, I can get on the mound and I can control where I throw the pitch. Yeah. But once that ball leaves my hand, I am no longer in control. I can put, make the perfect, the perfect pitch and that guy just puts a perfect swing on it. It's a home run. Yeah. But I can't, I have to go back and step on that mound and do it again. And who knows the very next time I face him, I can make the exact same pitch. And he swings and misses or he rolls over or whatever. But yeah, I mean, that's, you know, I never went out there thinking like, oh, I'm gonna go strike all these guys out. I was like, oh, I'm gonna go and attack. I mean, we were, I was, we were talking about that before you walked in. I was talking with the guests we had before about setting goals and things like that. And that's just kind of the approach that I've always had. And like every time you, you throw that pitch, let's say he does hit a homer, you have to step back on that mound and be able to reset. Absolutely. You're able to disconnect from it, right? And it's like one of my old hockey coaches, absolutely great coach. And he would always say, fix it and forget about it. And I now I always, I always tell myself at your sketch, like when I need to, when I need to fix something at your sketch and, and it's not just like a mental thought. It goes with a physical, like movement, right? Because when you can start pairing a physical movement with a mental thought, it, it reinforces it. And you can think like, oh, I need to reset. And sometimes you're able to reset without doing something physical, right? But if you can think like, like you're getting rocked or whatever and you're like, man, I need to reset. You get out of the pocket, you just take deep breath and you're like, okay, you have like some type of trigger word, whether it's like just simply thinking reset, thinking I personally think at just sketch, that's just simple for me, like it's just deep breath at just sketch. And then you're right back into it, you're focused, because you're trying to just win moments. You're not trying to win the war, like one of my favorite coaches that I have was always like, act like you're a chicken with your head cut off, because what happens when you cut the head off chicken, body still runs around still before it dies. So like your trigger or was I just sketch, mine was chicken, I would just sit there chipping, step back chicken, cool, picture of chicken running around with his head cut off, step back on the mountain, good to go just dial it in. And that's the, you know, you had a coach that kind of brought you to that point and knowing that, but there's a lot of actual like, you know, studies and science that goes into that concept of resetting. And I think a lot of people, I'm about those things pretty naturally, they don't really understand why it works or whatever it is, but you obviously knew like, Hey, when I said chicken, I step back on that mountain, it worked, right? And that's like super cool to see that those things can be implemented without any type of like, you know, having some mindset coach that's telling you, you need to do this. Like a lot of things like your body is pretty intuitive. You kind of know, like you're, you should be able to explore like, what kind of works for me and how can I make this better and, and, you know, take a step back and reflect and in this moment do this and ultimately it's chicken sometime. I mean, it was a, I got it for like, I ultimately start a little eighth grade, it was above called the mental game of baseball, and basically talked about all sorts of mental tricks and tips and things written by one of the best sports psychologists out there, Jade or. Yeah. And it was, it was incredible to read. I mean, should I, I think last year was the first year kind of upset about myself. You know what? I did. I didn't read it. I listened to it. So it wasn't, it was the first year that I didn't, yeah, I didn't actually read the book, but I've read the book or listen to the book every year since I've been in eighth grade. It's this one in consistency right there. It's my favorite. It's like my Bible. So. So, do you think every, every man should train in combat sports? I do. I do. I really do. Because I think combat sports is something that whether you want it to or not, you're going to build some of the characteristics that you need to be a man. Um, you know, whether it's a physical capability to actually protect your family, if you need to, whether it's like having the physical strength to do, you know, certain things, um, or it's the mental side of things, like being comfortable, being uncomfortable, you know, being able to set your ego aside and take a loss and being able to adjust and adapt to the struggles that you have, like overcoming obstacles. So when you look at it, it's like, okay, being a man, you should be able to lead by example, overcome obstacles, um, you know, deal with stress and, you know, do things that are uncomfortable, do difficult things, do it with a grateful heart and a productive mindset and you should have the physical capabilities to back those things up, right? And if you don't, that's okay. You can always work on them, but combat sports helps you do all of those things. Combat sports helps you kill that ego inside that's going to make you want to always be right in an argument with your significant other, you know, it's going to give you a little bit of a softer side with your kids. You know, it's going to make you feel more secure in the person that you are. It's going to give you an opportunity to mingle with people that are like you in some ways and vastly different than you in many other ways, because a gym is one of those places where you will have people from all types of races, all types of professional jobs. Like, you know, you, you can have, you know, cops and criminals on the mats at the same time. It doesn't matter. You're, you're, there's going to be a mix of people. You start to expose yourself to those different people, those different perspectives. It gives you better perspective and it also teaches you to learn, reflect, and those are two things that are vitally important to being a man, you know, being a husband, being a father, all of those things where it's like, okay, I need to be able to learn. I need to be able to kill my ego. I need to be able to adapt, be consistent, build strength, mentally and physically. And all of those things are embodied in martial arts. And it doesn't matter which one you choose, you can choose Jiu Jitsu, you can choose MMA. You know, you can even choose some of the other ones. But ultimately combat sports just helps you like be a better person and build a skill. And I think one thing that I forgot to mention is it gives you a community. And I think that that's one piece that so many men are missing in life, right? So many times we feel like we're alone. We feel like we're alone in our struggles. We feel like we're alone in the problems we have. We feel like we have so much that's riding on our shoulders and so much that we have to do. But when we step on the mats, we have people around us. We know that despite our differences, everybody loves everybody, you know, we're going to come and get a good training session and we're going to talk afterwards. We're going to connect it deeply with one another. And we're going to know that these people have our backs and that community is vitally important to being a man. I cannot agree more with everything you just said, I agree with everyone. I mean, our guest we had on was an episode that aired yesterday has talked about a lot of men not having a community and it was pretty much exactly what you just said. And he was kind of more talking toward, like, veterans and guys that have come back from appointments and talking about just the increase in male suicides over, like, at school. It's 2014. 40%. 40% is just saying like as many men have died from suicide as women have died. They die from breast cancer. Yeah. I think that's a big piece of it. Yeah, the community, the whether it's just like the camaraderie, whether it's giving you another, like, purpose, like something to get good at, right? I think especially people in the military, they have highly skilled jobs, highly stressful jobs, too. And they're so good at that. They thrive in that chaos. They have unbelievable abilities and they get put back in the regular world and they're like, this is just not stimulating. This is like, I'm doing some job that I feel like doesn't have a purpose and whatever. You get on the mats and then it's like, okay, like, you feel, feel that like stress again and you're, you feel like, Oh, I can overcome this. And now I can deal with it and I can adapt and I can put this like anxiety and maybe some anger and whatever into my training. And it gives me an opportunity to learn a skill set, right? Because a lot of those people are highly skilled individuals and they can't use that skill set in their everyday life. But now they can learn a martial art where it gives them another opportunity to build a high skill set that they're probably going to be pretty good at. And now they can, they feel like they have, they have the community. They have the purpose and they're building a skill set. They're being able to learn and they're also, it's a means of expression. At the end of the day, martial arts is an art. You get to express yourself through that, right? And it's like, okay, when, when somebody watches you fight it, when somebody watches you compete, you want them to see your competition and think about you in a certain way, right? And you can ultimately train be able to do those things. So whenever I compete, I want somebody to look and say, like, man, he was resilient. You know, he was relentless and he was fearless. And how can I do that? Like I can make sure that I'm looking forward, that I'm never quitting on myself, that I'm taking risks, I'm being intelligent about the risks that I take. Like it's an expression of the person you are and the things that you want to embody. And you're doing it through movement and, you know, sometimes a violent art. Yeah. One other piece, you know, that I don't mention, but it's something that I think about a lot is it really shuts martial arts, really shut off the rest of the world while you're doing it. You can't, you can't focus on anything other than that guy in front of you. And that's like one of my favorite pieces of it, just because, you know, with all the stuff I have doing in my life, it's like the one place where I can kind of go or this is in my bag and in a locker room and I can focus, all I can focus on for this next hour is, you know, training. Yeah. And it's like, like therapeutic. Yeah. You hit it right on the head, like step on the mats and everything, just you have a single focus. And you see this now, like how often you're standing in a line at the coffee shop and we used to be able to just stand there and be alone with that thought. Now everybody just pulls out the phone every time, knowing like we're losing the ability to be alone with our thoughts, right? And that's kind of scary. But when you step on the mats, like you don't have a phone, you don't have those things and you have a singular focus where now like, yeah, you don't have to be alone with all of those thoughts that are building up, but you get to focus and like express yourself. And like you said, just be present. I think that's the biggest thing is like being present and we can build that presence into all of the aspects of our lives. Like everything would be way better to jitsu is just a vehicle to do that. Yeah. I mean, it was the hardest thing, I mean, it is, it is the hardest thing I've ever done, which makes everything else in my life super easy. Yeah. Like if I can knock that out in the morning, yeah, my day is super productive because nothing is going to be harder than what I just went through on the mat. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. More, man. So what's a, what's a belief you used to hold about training or mindset that changed? Ooh, that's a tough one about training or mindset. I would say that some one thing that I've, that I've changed significantly is the idea that more is always better. And I say that because as I've gotten a little bit older, there'll be some injuries or is not always better. And that's not to say that I'm not telling you to go and, you know, train less or do less because, you know, you need more often than not, you're, you're not going to overtrain. You know, you should be training full intensity, doing all of these things. You should be tired. You should be, should be hurting and all of that kind of stuff. When I say more is not always better, it's, you have to know where you're at. If you're actually dealing with a certain injury and you, but you know, like we talked about before, you still need to do something. Maybe today's not the day where you do. Maybe today's the day where you do that small something and you recover because you know tomorrow you have to spar and tomorrow you want to actually do more and push yourself beyond where you thought you could go. So today, because I'm dealing with this injury, I do what I need to do, but maybe I don't push as hard as I could have. And I think yeah, a lot of people could probably interpret that in a bad way because you'll hear a lot of people say train smart or not harder. I think that's kind of bullshit sometimes because you got to train hard, man. Like you're going in, you're getting locked in the cage with another person that's trying to hurt you. If you're not training hard, you're going to get hurt or you're going to get beat up enough that you want to quit. You have to train hard, but there are times where you have to be intelligent enough to say, Hey, maybe today I don't do is do more. Maybe today I do the things I need to do. I do what I set out to do, but I do them a little differently to get the most impact overall so I can do even more tomorrow that I planned on doing anyway. How do you define success in your life? Define success. To me, success looks like living my purpose because I say that because success, what I thought about success before was accomplishing a lot. And I think there's a lot of people that think that is like, I want to accomplish this goal and I want to accomplish this goal. I want to accomplish this goal, but once you accomplish that goal, what happens now? And I think as a, especially as a driven individual, you're always driven to accomplish certain goals, right? And you accomplish the goal and then you're like, okay, I've, I did this thing. You know, I bought this car. I had won this tournament. I did this thing. Like what do I do next? I need to do more. You need to do something bigger. And for me, while those things are great. And I think those things do impact your overall success. Success to me looks like living with purpose and I would say my overall like purpose and mission in life is to educate and inspire all sharing connection, love and wisdom along the way. And being successful means that through all the things that I do, I'm going to live in alignment with that mission. If I do that, then no matter what I do, no matter how my life changes, no matter how my goals change because of whatever circumstances or whatever path I go down, I'm still on the track of living that purpose, I can feel fulfilled and successful because of that, matter where it takes me. Well, said your mission is to educate, inspire, educate, inspire, excuse me, with the biggest lesson by fighting this. To never go, never, well, be moving forward, there's always, there's always a way. You know, and I, I remember this very distinctly. I used to go to the thoroughbred wrestling academy to train with Jesse Martinelli because he coached there. So you know, a couple of times a week after he got done coaching his practices, it'd be like eight, thirty nine o'clock, but I'd go there and we'd get some extra training in. I got, you know, like we were talking about before. And I remember Marcus, who's the owner of thoroughbred and, and a coach there. And he was talking to the younger athletes and he would always give the most incredible speeches after these practices. So I felt grateful to even be there, just waiting for Jesse to be done while I'm listening to these practice, these speeches. And one day he was talking and then, you know, we were kind of talking afterwards and he told me, you don't always have to be better than the guy. You just have to find a way to win. And that made me realize like, okay, no matter what, there's always a way. There's always a way. No matter what obstacle you fit, it's like you kind of like extrapolate from that and expand it out to apply to different things. But no matter what obstacle you face, no matter what you do, no matter who you fight, no matter what it is that you're dealing with, there's always a way to get, there's always a way to get around it. Even if you can't see it in the moment, even if you feel like deeply depressed, like deeply hurt, like you're struggling with a lot of things. It's just taken a step back and remembering like, Hey, ma'am, like you're going to get through this. Like you're going to find a way you always do and like having faith, you know, whether it's religious or not, just having faith to say, Hey, there's always a way forward. And I think that's the biggest lesson that MMA has taught me because, you know, over the last 10, 15 years, like there's been so many obstacles, there's been so many times where I could have went, I could have stopped training, I could have stopped fighting, I could have stopped coaching and whatever and like, many of excuses. And ultimately it's like, Hey, just you got to keep moving forward and taking a step back, remembering your why moving forward and knowing like, Hey, there's always a way, there's always a way to find a way to win and whatever winning looks like to you. Is there one obstacle that stands out more than another? I think when I became a dad, it was a big obstacle. I actually found out that I was going to be a dad the same night that I, I was fighting for the Shamrock FC amateur, Bantamweight title. And I got TKO, the first time I've ever been TKO. And you know, just lost the title fight, broke contract was on the line, didn't get that pro contract, pushed, face messed up. And you know, then it was like, Hey, by the way, you're gonna be a dad, like, okay. So that was a big obstacle because not only was I like, you know, not only did I just like lose a fight that at up to that point, I'd only lost one fight before. So like, you know, adapting to a loss as difficult as it is, lost a big fight. I had significant physical damages. And I'm 23 years old and I don't even have my own place to live right now. And I'm going to be a dad. And I actually wasn't, wasn't working. I graduated college and I saved up money in college so I could just train and travel. I was like, okay, just lost a fight. My brains messed up, going to be a dad and need a job, need a job that's not fighting. So yeah, that's kind of where I got started and I took a job at, you know, as a machine operator on the floor, maybe like 15 bucks an hour, work in the weekend so I could be home during the week to take care of my son. I didn't have to take care of child, like pay for child care, I could have some benefits and health insurance, it sounded pretty nice. And then it was like, you know, I had Carson and moved my way up the company, found a way to keep training and ultimately like here I am. So I would say that was probably like the biggest obstacle in my fight career. You know, the rib injury was another one that took me out for a while because I never really had any good answers and know what it was going to look like moving forward, but yeah. Rib injuries are weird, like there's not like an easy way to fix that one. Like you know, you tear your ACL, like there's a pretty proven surgery that, you know, that works, you know, like for something like is like obscure as, you know, like a rib injury and separating the cartilage from your sternum. Yeah. It's a pretty obscure one, you know, crazy, crazy moment, man, you just, you lose the title fight. I know you're going to be a dad, like I can't imagine, like I remember when I found out I was going to be a dad, it was a different circumstance, you know, like, I was under similar ones to him. Yeah. Twice. Yeah, I was going to say you weren't battered though. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, that's a, it was just an interesting moment. Really. Again, it was a, it was an opportunity. It was a, you know, one of those opportunities is like, okay, here we go. It's a new challenge, um, new opportunity and just like anything else in life, you can either sit there and, you know, think about it, however you want to think about it, or you can see it as an opportunity and move forward and be excited and do what it takes to put yourself in the position to, you know, be a man, be a father and keep doing the things you need to do in life as a father, um, do you have your son and, and martial arts yet? No, not yet, um, he, we, man, since he was probably like, you know, could walk. We've been messing around, you know, we will wrestle well and he's got boxing gloves. He's got, uh, he's got a heavy bag, um, actually built an MMA gym in my basement. So I have wall mats and, you know, jujitsu mats and all that kind of stuff and we'll go down there and we'll mess around and come to the gym and things like that. Um, but he is not yet into like formal instruction. Um, he is, he's kind of all over the place. So I didn't want to, we got him into hockey, uh, learn to play hockey a little young and he just wasn't, it wasn't to the point where he wanted to do the skating and things like that and then ultimately it made him not really want to try it again. So I realized like, okay, like I don't want to put him into something too early and pull him away from like biking it long term. Um, so yeah, like we train a lot, like he knows how to throw around house kicks, front kicks, punches, he knows how to get in his stance. He knows what a takedown is. He can do a rear naked choke, a guillotine, things like that. And he loves to mess around, um, but no formal instruction just yet. We've talked about potentially starting wrestling sometime soon. Um, so, so we'll see, he's going to play baseball this year. Um, and we'll see, you know, what the, what the sports, the formal instruction sports look like he played some floor hockey, uh, over the last few months and stuff like that. So, um, I think Jujitsu is in his future, but, uh, nothing quite yet. Uh, I heard once that, you know, you can never make your kids love something, but you can hate some, you know, and that's something I'm trying to, trying to, you know, keep the front of my head while, you know, like I want to get the boys into wrestling, you know, ASAP. I was like, man, I don't want to, I don't want to start too early. I don't want to be that like, but she dad, it's, you know, like, I just want, I want them to love it. Cause I love it, you know, and, uh, it's just something I'm trying to, trying to keep him, keep him forefront on my head, but, uh, I think, I mean, I think if he's around enough and sees how much you love it, he's going to grow because like, I mean, Connor has only seen pictures and videos, like he's never seen me play baseball, but he fucking loves it. He's obsessed with baseball and he's never seen me play, uh, and you know, I take that back. He alumni, he was, I don't know, got to see me pitch him. And but yeah, he, I mean, he was obsessed with it for that. I'm going to get videos of two years old throwing baseball. Somebody. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. It's funny how that, how that happens. Yeah. Well, idea of like kind of leading by example and your kids watching what you do, right? And like, you know, so didn't get your story, but you said you were in similar circumstances to, you know, what my struggles with all that surprised. Yeah. So it was like your biggest, you know, mindset shift from before you were done to being a dad. Like what did, what did that kind of look like? Um, I mean, I'll be honest, that's pretty self selfish, uh, prior to that. And in that moment, I realized like it's no longer just about me and that I've got a whole nother person shaping their lives and I'm sure that I'm shaping it in the right direction. So that was a big shift. And then the next one was a divorce, uh, that happened a couple of years ago. That was a big mindset shift. So working my way through those two things and in the, I mean, we had another one, uh, no, they're 15 months apart, so yeah, we were pretty good at surprising each other with that stuff. Um, but yeah, no, that was, that was great. I mean, both, both kids, you know, made me focus like, I mean, that was the thing is like I had a business coach and I was freaking out, um, before Oliver was born. And she's like, I want you to write a letter to Oliver, like I want you to sit down and write a letter about all the things that you're excited about, all the things that you're concerned about, all your worries and all this. And it was just kind of, I just read it the other day. It was kind of, I still have it and I like to sit back and think like, man, these were the fucking things I was worried about. Like, yeah, it was like, it was nothing like it just, it just naturally, like you just, I just kicked it in the next year, like I knew I had to, like I knew that there was no other option. It was, I, you know, I wasn't just going to sit around and not let anything happen. Like I've got now, now not only do I have one, I've got two that I've got to provide for. And now I've got a second one and got to teach him and go back to the beginning, but how I'm going to teach him to be, you know, instill those principles, morals, values, ethics, all those things and to make sure that they're better than I, so that's ultimately, that's my goal. My goal is that my children are better than, better people than I gave you a Y, give you a Y, put you to that next level. And like you're, you, you know, seems like a more traditional approach, maybe, but, but with, with that, like, what was your biggest mindset shift from before being a dad to being a dad? Like what changed? I mean, I would say very similar to Pat's is, you know, I realized, wow, man, I was pretty selfish before. I mean, I, I've been married for a while now and we, me and my wife been together for almost 15 years. So it's like, you know, it's pretty, a pretty established relationship. But having, having the boys, that was a big wake up call, especially, you know, having the first one that was like, okay, wow, it's really not all about me. I, uh, organizing my time and my schedule and everything really changed. I like, really had to dial everything in and time block and, and then, but this is one thing that, you know, I've brought this up on an episode we had recently is like, I have a second one now who's almost nine months old and I was telling my wife how I feel like I'm, I feel like a little bit more of a connection with him than I ever did with our, our older son and she's like, well, you're around a lot. Like when our older son was, or, you know, really young, I was just still balls, still balls to the wall of my career. But like, I wasn't making the fan, my family as much of our priority as I am. And uh, that's definitely shift. That's fears and I think a, you know, we're talking about, I think the podcast has kind of been a, a kind of a reason for that, honestly, because I, we talk about fatherhood and everything on here so much that I'm like having, feel like I have to live the things that I'm, you know, like I have to put my money on the office and really like, live the shit that I'm talking about. I'm here all the time. Right. And we have awesome guests like you that come on and just kind of like seriously that, that inspire us to be better people and, and you know, we take little tidbits away from everybody and how do we implement that into our lives and it's been great. Yeah. Yeah. I can imagine so just like being able to talk to so many different people and have so many different conversations and get so many perspective. They're so different to stand up comedian in here and now we have a professional in the May fighter. It's like very diverse. Yeah. It's, it's awesome. You know, I, I really, this is the best decisions I think I've ever made is deciding to do this and it's been a lot of fun, been a lot of work, a lot of time, money and effort has gone into it, but I, I can do it any different. Yeah. Good. No regrets. Corey, this has been amazing having you on here, man. This is, I think a ton, and people are going to get a ton out of this episode. Definitely giving us a lot of wisdom here. Is there anything else we wanted to get about out of here? Oh, man. I think I'm good. I appreciate you guys for having me on. It's a really great experience. I love having these types of conversations and connecting with, you know, like minded individuals, productive, you know, fathers and, you know, career driven people and it's just a really great experience. So thank you. Absolutely. I'll have to get some training in again soon, Tuesday morning or something. Yeah. Get you back in the ghee. Yeah, but I need to, I need to, well, we like to end it with one last question. We call it the tombstone game. Yeah. Here lies Corey. What's it say on your tombstone? It's the top. What does it say? I would, let me say this. I would hope that I would have made an impact on other people's life. So let's go with something that you know is maybe a little bit inspirational. And say it would say, I lived a good life. And I know that while you reading this, I feel alone, remember, we're never alone. I'm always with you in spirit. And you can do great things, which are hard work, effort, time and energy, which are full mind into it. Perfect. Perfect man. Awesome. Thank you so much. Thank you. Well, thank you guys so much for tuning into the show. If you haven't clicked that subscribe button, please do so that would help us out a ton. Click that like button as well. Comment what you thought below. And we will see you next time. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music)