Tonight we continue our holiday intermission with a Christmas-themed guest episode by our very own Time Traveller. Many thanks, TT!
The Skinner Co. Network
FPGE15 - A Flash Pulp Christmas, by Rich the Time Traveller
(soft music) - Welcome to Flash Pop, guest episode 15. A Flash Pop Christmas by Rich the Time Track. This episode is brought to you by the mob, car wick, and the unknown package. Happy holidays, enjoy them. Why can't? (gun firing) Flash Pop is an experiment in broadcasting fresh pulp stories in the modern age. Three to 10 minutes of fiction brought to you Monday, Wednesday, and Friday evenings. Tonight, we continue our holiday intermission with a Christmas themed guest episode by our very own Time Traveler. Many thanks, TD. A Flash Pop Christmas by Rich the Time Traveler. - Here is a little yolted tale that I think will warm the cockles of any mobster's heart. To us the night before Christmas and in Skinner Co HQ, not a human was stirring. Save our stout Flash Pop crew. The unknown package was placed by the mail slot with care in hopes that its next version soon would be there. The clones were all nestled in their cell-culturing beds. All visions of conquest streamed into their heads. With all three Skinner's gathered around the soundboard, they had just settled down along Flashcast to record. When out in the yard there arose such a clatter, they sprung up from their mics to see what was the matter. A way to the window they flew like a flash, tore open the blinds and threw up the sash. The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow gave the luster of midday to the carnage below. When what to their wandering eyes should appear, but a glistening care-paced eight-legged fear. With a head full of eyes so dead and so sick, they knew in a moment it must be Karwick. More rapid than ponycorns, his minions they came, and he chittered and skittered and screeched him by name. Now Arrogoth, now Shilab, now Arachnia and Krenum, on Slasher, on Crasher, on Terentula and Venom, on the tops of the cars, all on the walls, now smash away, smash away, smash away, all. As dried husks before the wild hurricane fly, when they meet with an obstacle mount to the sky, so up to the house tops the hideous things flew, with the reek of the dead and the cry of a grew. And then in an instant they heard through the walls, the scraping and pawing of chitinous claws. As they sucked in their breasts and were turning around, down the chimney the creatures came with a bound. The four spider-thing stood there, ominous and scary. Dark is obsidian and disturbingly hairy, from their cheddering maws a poison did drip, and one rudely stabbed its leg through a gift with a rip. Their abdomen, how they pulsated with evil intent, they surveyed the room for flesh they could rent. Their bodies all swayed in an unsettling rhythm. It became all too clear there be no parley with them. With no further paws to jumped on Jaime, who was torn to pieces as the things had their way. A pope was prepared when one came to attack, but his bite was true and her body went slack. J.R.D. grabbed an oddly long gift under the tree, a smashed bearachnid that sprung for his knee. Swinging it wide, he took two more out, and in his excitement gave a small victory shout. But his words were too soon and his hope was soon dashed, when Kaurik's own leg through the walls did gash. The wordsmith impaled on its tip oh so keen, the terrible god bought him through his face to be seen. Your stories have pleased me, so I shan't kill you yet. Besides, I lost rights on your soul in a bet. Putting him down by the box, the god chomped away, he is claimed with a rumble. This is now Kaurik's day. (dramatic music) Flashpulp is presented by flashpulp.com, and is released under the Canadian Creative Commons attribution non-commercial 2.5 license. Text and audio commentaries can be sent to scare@skinner.fm, or the voicemail line at 206-338-2792. But be aware that they may appear in a future flash cast. We'd also like to thank the Free Sound Project, found at freesound.org. For a full listing of effects used during the show, as well as credits for the users who provided them, please check this episode's notes at flashpulp.com. And thanks to you for listening. If you enjoyed the show, please tell your friends. 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