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Hot Dog Mobile Toppled Over On Police Blotter Facts, Plus The Chump Line | 7.26.24 - The Howie Carr Show Hour 3
This podcast is brought to you by the Eden Pure Thunderstorm 3-Pack Special. Everyone loves the Thunderstorm. It doesn't take up any floor space, there are no filters to replace, and it's only one-third the cost of those bulky air purifiers. Take advantage of the Thunderstorm 3-Pack Special at edentpuredeals.com and use promo code HAWAY3. [MUSIC] Better strap yourself in, it's time for the Howie Car Show. You know, he said any time, any place. But more than that, he agreed to this specific debate on this specific network, on this specific date, and now he's pulling out. So we're just done with phrasing, right? That's not a thing anymore. Live from the Matthews Brothers Studios. I don't want to work, I just want a free Obama phone. Hold on, phone's for you, I think it's the devil. We call to say Michelle and I couldn't be prouder to endorse you and to do everything we can to get you through this election and into the overlaps. You know what it is. [LAUGHTER] This is part of the outlet. Bush. Dr. Biden said, being committed to him, she said, because he had these little babies who had lost their mom, that this had to be a commitment for life, or I wasn't going to do it, because I didn't want to put those babies through that. That was all bull[bleep] that she just pocketed the cash. [LAUGHTER] Rump swabs, hacks, and moonbaats beware. It's-- [MUSIC PLAYING] --Howie Carr. Oh my goodness, I sure hope it's Pete Buttigieg, as the vice presidential nominee. You know, I've never thought this thing was in the bag, but if it's Buttigieg, I may breathe a sigh of relief. I don't think she could overcome that. He's done such a bang-up job. This trans-portation secretary. How are those commercial airline flights doing? Been flying on Delta lately? How about the supply chain? You ever have any shortages of baby formula for your kids or your grandkids? 2021? How about those ports on the West Coast? He really got those up and running, didn't he, in a fine way? And most recently, how about those eight new charging stations for electric vehicles? Only cost $8 billion, $1 billion per charging station. And all the gangs that are normally working catalytic converters can just come in and strip them down for their copper wiring. It's wonderful, isn't it? 844, 500, 42, 42, you know, JFK assassination, they had the magic bullet. Jared just pointed out, now they have the magic shrapnel. That's what they're going to have. And you know, Dan Goldman is going to be on the commission to investigate. I tell this story before, because I think it sums up the Warren Commission. They appointed all these guys. They thought we're going to do the right thing. Republicans, who they had the goods on. And Democrats that they thought would tow the line, like Richard Russell, the senator from Georgia. And even he was a friend of the Lyndon Johnson's in the Senate. And they brought in the report, and it was just absolute garbage. And Richard Russell, loyal Democrat that he was, said, I'm not siding this. This is a lie. This is all lies. So they brought him into the Oval Office. This is when they had the tape recorders running. And LBJ is now the president. He says, senator, you got to sign this. You got to sign. You're the only one holding out. And he said, Lyndon, I can't sign this. I don't believe a word of it. And Lyndon said, well, I don't believe it either. But you still got to sign it. That's a true story. You don't hear it much. But it's not, you know, somebody heard this or that. It's on tape 7-7-4. I want it to be the fake Indian. It's not going to be two women. That's a bridge too far, you know? Especially two women, neither of whom have anything between the ears. And both of whom are total frauds. Total frauds. Time now for the Chumline. [MUSIC PLAYING] [MUSIC PLAYING] [MUSIC PLAYING] Kamala Harris is running as the first black female president of the United States. But didn't Joe Biden already hold that position somewhere between driving his truck and wrestling with Cornpop? Cornpop was a bad dude. And yes, you're right. He was the first black female vice president under Obama. Obama picked him during the pandemic because it was really a tough time in Sinemta, Detroit. That's all on tape too, just like Lyndon Johnson telling Russell he didn't believe any of the findings of the Warren Commission, the lone gunman, and the magic bullet, et cetera, et cetera. Hey, are we? Governor Patrick Holling, there you go again, making sport of KJP's vocabulary and pronunciations. You of all people should talk. Claps, coloric, and pink. Queen, corn sword, deleterious, effects. Three of them disgust, falafel, falafel. He had a heart fibrillation or whatever. No wonder he didn't get into Brown. Heh, we're going to be fine. [BEEPING] I'm a writer, not an orator. I could spell all those words. And I know when to use them and when not to use them. And most of those words, you know what? I don't use them. Because I proudly write for a fifth grade reading level. That's what I was taught in journalism school. And it's still true today. Although now, given the downfall of American public education, fifth grade is kind of like senior in college. Today's chumpline is brought to you by Eastern Security Safe, America's largest safe source. Eastern Security Safe has gun safes by Fort Knox safe and Browning gun safes, offering an economically priced safe that still offers quality, not found in the big box store, so called. Mention Howie for 5% off. Visit their site at easternsecuritysafe.com. That's easternsecuritysafe.com. I recall a certain senator dropping out of the presidential race for plagiarism. I don't remember his name. He doesn't remember his name. (beeping) I'm the first, you know, the name. In a thousand generations to come out of the coal mines, to get a coalage education. And I didn't learn a dumb thing. I'm Joe Biden. I remembered it. I remembered my name. Mr. Ray, you may now make your opening statement. - Thank you. We believe that Donald Trump was stung by a murder hornet wearing a tiny maga cap. (beeping) - That's what they're gonna ask him about. Did you, Mr. President, and I'll remind you it's a crime to lie to an FBI agent. Did you see a murder hornet wearing a MAGA cap? Approach the podium where you were speaking in Butler, Pennsylvania. - Ollie, do you know how non-binary people kill people? They slash them. (beeping) (laughing) - June Rose, I hope she was back at Providence City Hall today accepting the accolades of her boss, the first queer president of the Providence City Council. Her words, not mine. His, excuse me, were her, their words, not mine. - Don't know much about borders are. Don't know much about electric cars. Don't know much about, don't know much about, you know, the thing. (beeping) (laughing) - That's a potential theme song for her as we go along. Write that down, Jared. - Hi, Harry. I was wondering how Joe's trained from the Pacific across the Indian Ocean and so on. And now that he's semi-retired, is he gonna make Kamala at Railroads there? (beeping) - Now that's Hunter's job, the smartest man he knows. Wasn't Hunter on the Amtrak board? That's quite a gust body, the Amtrak board. I believe Mike Dukakis was on the Amtrak board too, because he took the green line to the state house every morning from Brookline. What is that? That's the B line, isn't it? I think. I'm not a green line guy. I'm an orange line guy. - Kamala wasn't named the borders are, just like Brandon isn't named the big guy. (beeping) (laughing) - Exactly, exactly. And you know, she was very proud of the way we got out of Afghanistan. It was a wonderful thing. Cut 11. (upbeat music) - President Biden always said that he want you to be the last person in the room, particularly for big decisions, just as he was for President Obama. He just made a really big decision, Afghanistan. - Yes. - Were you the last person in the room? - Yes. - And you feel comfortable? - I do. - Yeah, 'cause I was stoned at the time. I don't remember anything that happened. Any more than Biden remembers anything. Remember Biden always wanted to be the last one in the room. He told Obama, don't take out Osama that he's been loading. One of the few accomplishments of the Obama years. - Lovey, I think it's rather clear that Kamala won't make it to the finish line unless she has an accomplished running mate like me. Unlike her, I'm proud to be DEI this summer, dining exclusively on the islands. I just hope that Jen just car doesn't come up with some cheap tag line, like vote for the ho and the jiggle-o. Oh, the things I'll go through for a private jet. (beep) - You know, he's really got to be happy though, that he downsized from Nantucket, given the disaster with those wind turbines that he supported so vociferously for so many years. - Lovey, thank God we got off Nantucket before the disaster happened. - Christopher Ray, now we're saying it was a bullet that had Donald Trump's ear, but the ricocheted off his ear and killed the shooter. Trump is now being indicted for murder. (laughing) - Now, that's worthy of the Babylon B, I think. - The most dangerous words in the English language are, I'm Janet Mills and I'm here to help. (beep) - I think the most dangerous words in the English language are, "We're here from the FBI and we're here to interview you." Take a witness statement. (upbeat music) (beep) - That was your last Chumpline message. Thank you for calling Howie Carr, you chump. - All right, that's it for the Chumpline today. The Chumpline is the recorded voicemail message service of the Howie Carr show. You can call and leave a message at any hour between one and four p.m. Eastern time. Every weekday, the Chumpline number, if you wish to leave such a message, eight, four, four, five hundred, forty, two, forty, two, eight, four, four, five hundred, forty, two, forty, two, press two for the Chumpline, leave your message. We may or may not play it at this time each weekday. If you didn't hear your message or you just like there are second brand new Chumpline of the day, we have one, it's called Chop Chumps and it's posted every evening around seven o'clock wherever you get your Howie Carr show podcast. Chop Chumps is where we put all the messages we didn't have a rumor time for just now. Every night at seven, you can pick up Chop Chumps wherever you get your Howie Carr show podcast. Today's Chumpline is brought to you by Eastern Security Safe in the England's largest safe source. Eastern Security Safe has gun safes by Fort Knox Safe and Browning Gun safes, offering an economically priced safe that still offers quality not found in the big box stores. Mention Howie for five percent off, visit their site at easternsecuritysafe.com, that's easternsecuritysafe.com. - Don't know much about borders are. Don't know much about electric cars. Don't know much about, don't know much about, you know, the thing. (beeping) - She does know a lot about Willy Brown and what he likes. Summer's in full swing, temperatures are hot, grills are hot and the deals are hotter than fire at Omaha Steaks. That's right, America's original butcher is heating up the summer with blazing hot deals on mouthwatering, grilling favorites, guaranteed to tantalize your taste buds. For a limited time, you can get scorching savings on legendary flavor during the hotter than fire sale at Omaha Steaks.com. Every package is carefully curated by the flavor experts at Omaha Steaks to deliver an exceptional experience and they started just $99. Plus as a bonus to my listeners, you get an extra $10 off with promo code Howie at checkout. I want to tell you today about the burger perfection flight with free shipping right now at Omaha Steaks. They have burgers made out of specific cuts of meat, five different kinds, sirloin burgers, ribeye burgers, porterhouse, New York strip and my favorite brisket burgers. Jared has gotten the burger perfection flight. They're great, aren't they Jared? They are all amazing. They're the best burgers I've ever eaten. I know I say everything from Omaha Steaks is the best whatever I've ever eaten but it is really the best anything I've ever had from them. I'm partial to the ribeye burgers myself. I love brisket burgers. But whatever you want, you've always thought about something like that, what it would be like to grind up your favorite kind of steak and make it into a burger. Now's a chance to see what it is. It's the burger perfection flight with free shipping right now. It's an amazing deal, limited time only for $99.99 but all that stuff is great in this hotter than fire sale at Omaha Steaks. From exquisite steaks to legendary burgers, premium pork to air chilled chicken, Omaha Steaks is guaranteed to make your summer worth savoring. Shop the hotter than fire sale today and get exclusive savings on mouthwatering packages, starting at just 99 bucks like the burger perfection flight. Plus get an extra $10 off with promo code Howie at checkout. This offer is only available for a limited time and you're not going to want to miss it. So shop today before these deals go up and smoke. That's OmahaStakes.com promo code Howie at checkout. I'm Howie Carr. The Howie Carr Show. Howie Carr is back. Today's poll question is brought to you by American Independence Gold Group. Until Wednesday, July 31st, American Independence Gold is saying thank you to any investor that spends a minimum of $10,000 with a Valkambi 5 gram bar. I'm holding it in my hand right now. So this is worth about, depending on the day, yesterday was worth about 425, 450 bucks. I haven't checked today, but it's a good incentive to buy or buy gold or to transfer money from your IRA into an account. This investment could be cash, or as I say, an IRA, an individual retirement account transfer. This is one week only, so contact them today at HowieCarGold.com, HowieCarGold.com and see how you can get one of these with a $10,000 transfer or investment. Jared, what's the poll question, what are the results thus far? Today's poll question, which you can vote in at HowieCarShow.com, is if you were Donald Trump, would you agree to be questioned by the FBI about anything? Hell no. 91% of the audience agrees with you, no way. All right, 844, 542, 42. Miranda Divine yesterday wrote a great column about local cops are now refusing to share info with the FBI as agency suffers crisis of confidence with DEI hires, damning whistleblower report reveals. No kidding. Just what a mess the FBI is. They got to get that job. Well, job one is closing the border. Job two is beginning to clear out the dead one at the FBI. Ray, you're next with HowieCar. Go ahead, Ray. Hi, Howie. Hi. Yeah, I initially called to-- I don't know if you're new or not. But CBS, when this attempted assassination started, CBS said they didn't know if it was a bullet or a shard of glass. Now, I know Donald drinking, so I don't know where the glass would have-- A shard of glass. What is it? Did it happen in Butler, PA, not Canton, Massachusetts? Was he hit with some taillight, too, from that came off the SUV? Come on. It's ridiculous. I know. It was told to me-- Head up like the crime scene. Is Trooper Paul been recruited as a special agent of the FBI? Go ahead, Ray. While I was waiting, and I wouldn't wait that long for Donald, so I mean, you're lucky I'm here. I met you twice. You got to be good in your notebook, though. Once at the melody tent. And anyways, I'm from Antarctica, Springfield, and now Hyannis. I've been here for 24 years, and Hyannis, and I love it. The Kennedy's are gone, so I feel safe. Thanks. But the reason I got that up is because when I was in Springfield, John Kerry went down to Antarctica. And I went down there twice with the Navy operation. Ray, I'm sorry. We'll run out of time. Call back again. When we come back, we are going to have police plot our facts Friday. The laser cap will be on. Check me out on Rumble or social media. I'm Howie Carr. Live from the Matthews Brothers Studios. 844-542-42844-542-542-508 says the original fanciful speculation that the glass came from the teleprompter has been totally debunked. Whatever struck him, he was shot. He was wounded. Okay? It's ridiculous. All right. It's that time of the week. It's Friday evening. That means it's time for police plot our fact Friday. Why do you still read the newspaper? I like to keep up on local news, like the police blotter. Whenever the laws of any state are broken, the duly authorized organization swings into action. The fact is coming through. Here's the kind of adventure you've been waiting to hear. Our boiled action and mystery. So stand by for trouble and suspense. Stand by for adventure. You know how it works? All week long, we ask the listeners, the viewers, the readers to send in their funny stories that they see online, mostly now, or in their local daily or weekly newspapers from the police blog, the police blotter, whatever they call it in your local newspaper if it's still around. And just any kind of funny story involving LEOs, law enforcement officers, first responders. And at this time, every Friday, we read the best stories that have been sent to us. You email them to us at policeblotter@howiecarshow.com, policeblotter@howiecarshow.com. And Taylor comes in and he reads the stories every Friday night and he gives a nice prize to the two best entries of the week in our opinion. What have we got this week for the winning entries? They will get a go-woke, go-broke T-shirt, lovely white T with red lettering. It's a great T-shirt. And of course, I'm about to do the honors to turn on. Oh, yes, well, Police Blotter Facts Friday is brought to you by Northeast Hair Restoration. And you can watch this segment live at rumble.com/thehowiecarshow to see how we wearing the laser hair cap. I just turned it on, you can hear the sounds. Your laser cap may not have these sounds available, I have a special prototype, yes. Learn how you can get a fuller head of hair and a laser hair cap of your own at pfehair.com or call 1-800-208-Hair. Dr. Di Stefano does a fantastic job and after he does this new procedure, which is even more advanced than the one I have, you get this, you get the laser cap and that grows even more of your hair back and it's, I think it's working and I seem to need a haircut more often. You do need a haircut. And three weeks before a laser cap, I could go four or five weeks. Wow, that is remarkable. It's working. Alright, let's get into the runners-up these do not win a prize. State Police stopped traffic on I-91 in Hartford so family of ducks could cross. State Police, I knew this would be a reaction. I've been behind this kind of thing before on 1-28. Yeah, it's not the most fun. State Police Thursday released body camera footage of the ducks being ushered across the blacktop in the area of exit 33 in Hartford, Connecticut. They said they moved the ducks out of the roadway and cleared the scene for traffic to continue. However, the ducks came back into the roadway later on which caused a second response. During the second incident, a Department of Motor Vehicles Officer was the first unit on scene and responding troopers said they helped with stopping traffic given the repeat incidents Hartford Animal Control was then contacted to help with removing the birds from the highway and relocate them to safety. So this begs the question, what animal do you stop for? What is your line? I won't break for snakes, I won't break for squirrels, I won't break for rabbits, where do you? I'm not having an auto accident to save an animal, certainly not a duck. I see there's a reasonable distance between you and the person behind you where you can safely stop and allow the animal to cross the road. I'll allow it to cross the road. I was once in Middlesex County in Acton and a giant turtle came across the road and the person stopped and we were trying to figure out how to move it. But you know those big turtles, they bypassed on the snapper? Well, I don't know if they're a snapper, I don't know what a snapper is or, but I know that Chuck Berry song and I don't want to be anywhere. I don't want any of my tail. I don't know, I don't know, it was a pain. I once was getting onto the highway and there was a family of what looked like ferrets almost crossing the street and baby ones. So I stopped because it's a mammal and it's not one you see every day. So I figured maybe this is an endangered species. I don't want to all cover my bases, turned out to be a family of fisher cats and I should have run away. Yeah, I was going to say it was probably a fisher cat. When I was a young reporter in North Carolina, I was going down with a photographer one time just to cover, I don't know, it was like a hostage thing and it was over and all that. We were just going down this rural street and there were some duck type things crossing over and the other lane. And the car in front of us swerved across the double yellow line to hit him. Oh no. I still, it was almost 40, it was more than 40 years ago. I still remember it. The photographer and I going, wow, I don't want to run into that guy. No, thank you. I wonder if that was the guy who took the hostages last night, we're going to report the story. And to the people who say I'm a dog hater, last week I had to stop for a dog that got loose, a little puppy like a Yorkie or something got into the roadway. I did stop and I let it cross into the middle of the road and I kept going. I didn't get out and help it, but I did say I don't know, but if it did, it wasn't on my account. All right, continuing with police plotter facts Friday, Oscar Meyer, Wienermobile rolls over after crashing on highway. The Wienermobile hit another car just after 11 a.m. in Chicago or just outside of Chicago when its driver loss control while driving on Interstate 294, the driver overcorrected while regaining control of the massive hot dog van causing it to roll on to its side. No one was injured in the crash, which closed the right lane of northbound I-294 for over an hour. A spokesperson for the Oscar Meyer brand, which has several of the iconic Wiener mobiles told the Chicago Sun times the company is grateful that everybody involved is safe and there were no injuries. Well, it's important you got to flip the hot dog if you wanted to cook evenly. You know you're having a bad day when you get held up in traffic because the Oscar Meyer Wiener mobile turned over in front of you. I wonder what the safety rating on that thing is. It can't be too good. Twenty hot dogs would equal roughly a nickel. It doesn't seem like you'd be in real good shape if you were driving that thing and there was that kind of crack up. By the way, Limerick Guy says with the ducks the police were trying to avoid a quack up. Exactly. Ha, ha, ha. Mitt Romney loves hot dogs. It's his favorite meat. Yes, his favorite meat. He's like, what did, what did I see you say one time you said I'm a, I'm a, I'm a severe conservative or I'm severely conservative. It's severely something Tennessee store clerk caught on video stealing customers one million dollar winning lottery ticket. A Tennessee gas station clerk was allegedly caught on surveillance video stealing a customer's million dollar winning lottery ticket after lying and telling the winner they had lost. The unidentified winner bought two twenty dollar diamond and gold scratch off tickets from twenty three year old staffer, meat Patel at a shell station, meat meat is that who Romney was referring to that's his favorite meat is his brother vegan meat meat Patel who was at a shell station in Murphy's borough and handed him back the tickets to check Patel returned one of the winning tickets along with a forty dollar prize while ignoring the fact that the other one had won a million dollars. He threw it on top of the trash Craig said of Patel. This is lieutenant detective Steve Craig who then took the trash outside as the winner left. If you follow him on the camera, you can see him grab the ticket and put it in his pocket. Patel later went to Tennessee Lottery Commission to claim the ticket as his own through their normal line of questioning. There were enough red flags for them to investigate easily finding the surveillance footage that made it pretty obvious what Patel had done. It's pretty obvious. But for me to put it in front of twelve jurors and make sure that they all come to the same conclusion said Craig. So he's going to trial? It seems so. The rightful winner, a father from Antioch, Tennessee, will now finally get his one million dollar jackpot. Well my question is could the mass Lottery Commission have ferreted out this crime? Probably not. There probably some McAlbert's working there. No I would say that they would go to meet. They would say meet. We have this tape. I am not knowing. I am good. I'm meeting comrades. You're going to have to split. You're going to have to whack up the pot with us as they say. Dude, just stop suspected DUI golf cart driver leads deputies on chase in the villages. Ah, I know it. I know it. As soon as I heard golf cart. A lake county man is facing multiple charges after he led deputies on a drunken chase while driving a golf cart in the villages. According to an arrest report around 1 a.m. last Friday deputies spotted a red golf cart traveling east on county road 466 near Okamik path. There's video of it. The audio is not very good, but it's it looks like an old fashioned golf cart. It's got like the red and white striped fringe on the top. It's pretty cool. Officials said they attempted to stop the driver 21 year old Christopher Esdale multiple times after he was driving in the middle of the road, which has not improved roadway for golf carts. Esdale was then seen driving over a curb and onto a golf cart only pathway. At one point deputies stopped a patrol car in the golf cart lane and Esdale drove onto the grass and around the car to flee law enforcement who added that Esdale not only refused to comply with flashing lights, but several verbal commands to stop. According to the arrest report, a deputy exited his patrol car and reached for Esdale who attempted to pass him on the golf pathway. Esdale was then pulled from the golf cart onto the ground and was detained. Deputies said Esdale had. Deputies said Esdale had watery eyes, slurred speech and smelled of alcohol. The proverbial thousand yards there. So we've gone from a surrey with a friend John Tom to a golf cart with a friend John Tom. Yes, we have. Let's do one more here before we go to the break and then get to the winners. California man arrested for allegedly riding horse while under the influence. California man was arrested this week after he was discovered to be driving under the influence except the man was not behind the wheel of a car instead riding his horse with an open container of alcohol and a post shared on social media chips in Merced, California revealed that officer Cody Brackett discovered a horseback rider carrying an open container of alcohol, the rider and is that again? How would that be against the law? It's an open container. You're on a mode of transportation on a public roadway. Well, what kind of road was he on? Does not say I mean, if you're on a trail get a load of this story here at the bottom of the page in the corner. Remember, don't you, you go ahead and have yourself a cold one. I don't mind less do you be concerned about the safety of the horse? Officer Brackett reportedly displayed true compassion and ensured the return of the horse to its home after the arrest. It doesn't say where he what kind of roadway he was on, but it does cite the exact vehicle code California vehicle code, 21050 rules of the road apply to those operating animals on the highway are like to come up to see you sometime back to Arden back to the turtle. I got my hand sliced open by a huge turtle. I was moving off the road in a rainstorm while wearing a dress and stiletto heels. And hope this is a female. Yes, hand got infected, but I still feel good about it. I mean, she was wearing high heels, but I would, you know, I watched someone else try to move that turtle, but I was my plan was to use my feet, if anything, if I was going to have to get involved with it. You got to stay towards the rear of the turtle. Right. Those things have surprisingly long lines. And you know, you do not want to put your hand down here at the turtle, turtles head. An alligator snapper especially is, they look like dinosaurs when they get to a certain size. I'll just give you the first few lyrics of Chuck Berry's only number one hit. My ding-a-ling, my ding-a-ling. He went across what is, what's it called, turtle? Turtle Creek. Turtle Creek. Full of snappers, full of snappers, yikes. All the way he held his ding-a-ling-a-ling. Even if you're not in turtle creek, you watch out, 844-542-42, I'm Howie Carr. Leave a message for the big guy, call the chumpline, 844-542-42. Press two and leave your message, then listen every weekday at five to catch the best messages of the day. The Howie Carr Show is back. See, I turned it off during the break, the laser cap because, you know, they say don't do more than 20 minutes a day. Maybe that's why my hair has been growing so fast, because sometimes- Saddle control, you can't stop it. You look like a hell's angel. All right, okay, do we have time for any runners-up or just the winners? We're just going to get to the winners, our first winner, drug smuggle bid thwarted by lasagna anomaly. What? A nurse aide responsible for distributing medicine to inmates at an Indiana prison has been charged with trying to smuggle cocaine and marijuana into the facility via a bowl of frozen lasagna. As alleged in court documents, Regina Davis, 46, arrived for work earlier this month at the Indiana State prison where the property of employees passes through an x-ray machine before they enter, including their lunch or dinner. The maximum security lock-up houses more than 2,000 adult male prisoners and is located 45 miles east of Chicago, as Davis' lasagna moved through the x-ray machine, a guard thought the Italian delicacy looked odd, so he thought the opinion- he sought the opinion of a colleague who- No, no, no, that's ricotta. Something did not appear. Natural. You keep meatballs in your jacket? They dug through the lasagna. They found several packages wrapped in electrical tape that contained coke and pot. Davis said she had been at a female friend's house the prior evening getting a tattoo when the woman gave her two containers of lasagna to eat, Davis claimed not to know the grub was stuffed with a contraband. Don't you usually stuff the drugs in a different vehicle, shall we say, an orifice, isn't that the easiest way to- Well, if you're not so inclined, I suppose in your lasagna is the next best thing. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to ride this rigatoni into the sky. By the way, what is a lasagna anomaly though? I don't understand that headline. An anomaly in the lasagna, the cocaine in the marijuana. When it went through the x-ray machine, it showed- That's what you call regional Italian cooking, and some test tricks. Anomaly, cannoli, kind of the same thing. The story also says it's unclear if the lasagna also contained tiny meatballs. So there you go, Jared. And our final winner, drunk Florida man, violating probation, reportedly called 911 for a ride home. Sometimes an idea can sound like a good one at the time, only for you to realize you were just drunk. That would certainly explain the paint color choice of my bedroom claims this author. This is a weirdly written story, you should have read it beforehand. Likewise, calling the police for a ride home while you're violating probation isn't a good idea. A drunk Florida man violating probation, reportedly called 911 for a ride home but was given a ride to jail, happened in Lake Wales, Florida. It's good he didn't make the decision to drink and drive, but if you're not supposed to be driving or visiting bars, then you might run into a problem. Miami Herald reports that this suspect was put on five years probation back in 2021. Some of his special conditions included restrictions against drinking, driving, and visiting bars. When deputies found him, he wasn't wearing a shirt, and that would make him pretty easy to spot. He told law enforcement he had been drinking, and his wife dropped him off out there, and he was stranded. What made Milwaukee famous made a loser out of this guy. That's it for Police Blogger Facts Friday, brought to you by Northeast Hair Restoration PFEHair.com or 1-800-208-Hair. Thank you, Taylor. Dr. Matt will be coming up, he may be a little late, but you can get on board now.