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(upbeat music) - Brought to you by the EveryDollar app. Start budgeting for free today. - So I just see a lot of people my age are younger, bragging and boasting about their nice cars, houses and vacations. And I just feel like I'm losing it life. I live a pretty humble lifestyle, but what am I doing wrong? How do you work this? - You said people, you said people your age. What is your age? - I'm 33. - Okay, you're single? - Yes. - What do you make? - I make 60,000 before taxes. - Good for you. What do you do? - I'm a health educator. - Cool, fun. All right. Do you have a lot of debt? - I actually have no debt except for my mortgage, which I only owe 140,000. - Mm-hmm, okay. All right. - Well, this is the problem that the millennial, your generation was one of the first ones to really, really struggle with it. Rachel Cruz, my daughter wrote a number one best selling book talking about this whole thing of the power of social media and the power of, it used to be that we would say, don't keep up with the Joneses. Have you ever heard that old saying? - Of course. - But the problem was in those days, it wasn't as hard to keep up with the Joneses 'cause they lived next door and you saw them driving their car, but you also saw them have big fight. And you also knew that their kids were messed up and you knew this and you knew that. So, when they got a car, it wasn't as big a deal 'cause you kinda knew some of the dirt too, right? But on social media, your only thing you're looking at is the highlight reel. You're only looking 'cause nobody posts on there, how my husband just got me a 1992 Honda hashtag blessed. Nobody does that, right? And nobody posts the three weeks after the beach vacation and the fight around the credit card bill and-- - 'Cause we can't buy groceries and diapers. - Yeah. - They'll post that. - And so what you're seeing and really our whole culture, even old people like me that look at social media, we all can fall prey to this 'cause we're not seeing reality. What we're seeing is only what, have you ever seen these pictures of these little, like all the little children and little, like they're five and four and six and they're all like wearing little white suits and they're on a picnic blanket and they're at the park and it's like, "Oh, we're at the park." When I went to the park with three kids, it looked like freaking wringling brothers and Barnum and Bailey circus. When I was in the mud, the other one's pulling the other one's hair, we wouldn't have had a picture like that in a million years. Can you imagine taking Rachel Cruz at four years old to the park and expecting her to behave? Not a chance. I don't know how these people get those, are those mannequins? How do they get them to sit like that? Take that picture. And that's what you're comparing to. - They push a button now and it takes a thousand pictures at once and it catches one. And it's like, that's it, right? Hey, so- - No, no, shop their own kids. - Hilary, where are you seeing this? Are you seeing on social media? You're getting your friends texting you about it, where are you seeing it? - Just kind of everywhere. I mean, social media is a big part of it, obviously with TikTok and Instagram and Facebook, but also just, you know, it works. Someone says, "Oh, I'm going to the Bahamas for two weeks." Or, "Oh, look at my new Escalade." And it's just like- - Have you ever been to the Bahamas? (laughing) - No, but I was like, your Escalade costs more- - Let me just tell you, there's a couple places there that are nice, but there's a whole lot of dumpy crap with one good picture on the website too. I mean, it's looks like 1960s holiday end down there, a lot of times, be careful with that one. - I love the Bahamas, I just love it. But anyway, yeah. I mean, even Atlantis is getting really old. I'm just saying. - Here's Hillary, here's the, I think it's a both end. - Yeah. - That Escalade is actually really an amazing car. They're very nice. And 99% chance that's not real money that bought that. And so if you just called into the show and said, "I'm 33 year old, single female, I make 60 grand, I only have 120 grand left on a house, I bought myself." - We would be going, "Touchdown!" - We would celebrate you as like the model. I'm looking and saying, I hope my daughter Josephine is in that kind of situation. If she finds herself 33, making 60 grand in Utah, and she's on merit, I hope she's exact in the situation you're in. That'd be amazing. - You're amazing. You're doing it great though. - You're doing it right. - Hi guys. - You're the indie filmmaker. And all you have is a camera, and you're telling real stories, and you can't compete with the Godzilla movies that are made in computer labs. That's what you're doing. - Well, that makes me feel better, because I just, you know, and I also recently just paid cash for my master's degree. And so all that money that I had saved, and just like, that could have been a vacation or a car. I shouldn't have done that. - Dude, you just put it in the best bin in yourself for the next 50 years of your life. - You traded a master's degree for Bahamas. - Well, this is a good trade. (laughing) - I hope so, oh man. But yeah, I guess it's nice to have some reassurance coming down. - Yeah, and here's the other thing. I had to go through the thing when I was a little bit younger than you when I went broke, I was 28. And I was driving a Jaguar when I went broke. And it broke my heart to drive a hoopty after that. And I drove this horrible old vehicle. And but I by then had become so disgusted with me and how I was behaving with the people like the people you're talking about. I was buying stuff for other people to look at. And I got all that completely fried out of my soul when I went broke. And I don't buy anything now for anybody except for sharing to me. I don't even care if my kids like it. As a matter of fact, I kinda like it if they don't like it. So I just buy stuff 100%. I drove a really nice car today because I really like that car. I don't even care if anybody sees it. I like the car and I had a good time driving it here. And that's the only reason I buy it. But I used to have to pull up in those hoopties. I drove a car that was loaned to me. That was a 90% bondo. And the vinyl roof was torn loose across the front. So when you drove it, it filled up with air. It looked like a parachute on top. And so I would pull up at a stoplight after having driven a Jaguar and the top would settle. Deflate, it would deflate. Come back down at the stoplight. Meanwhile, I'm sitting next to people in nice cars that just got home from the Bahamas. And I'm looking at them going, what am I doing wrong? And what I finally realized that today, if you did that, if you pulled up next to somebody to stoplight today, the average car payment at that stoplight is $750. See, I like what you said. - Yes. - Your verbal comment was perfect. - You're winning, Hillary. Hey, okay, Hillary, can I poke at one quick thing before we go to break? - Sure, sure. - How much of these videos you're seeing, these pictures you're seeing of these trips are reinforcing a sense of loneliness? - Probably a lot because I feel like they just can go do whatever, you know. - Okay, I want that to be where your emphasis is. Not on trying to get the vacation. Should I get a master's degree and pay for it with cash or go on vacation? Of course get the master's. I want you to start creating opportunities to have friends and community and connection and laughter right where you live. Start cultivating that and it's gonna make the other shiny stuff. It's just gonna, it's just gonna not be that big a deal. You're right where you need to be. - Create your free every dollar budget today, the simplest way to budget for your life.
