Brought to you by the Every Dollar App, start budgeting for free today. So back in college, my parents loaned me about $18,000 to go to college. It was $15,000 in principal and $3,000 in interest to help me pay for college. Under the agreement that I would pay it off within three years of graduation. Fortunately, I was able to do that. But, after listening to many, many episodes of your guys' show, I feel a little bit taken advantage of. And my question is, is it worth expressing my feelings to my parents now, despite the loan being paid back? Or do I just accept the lesson, don't borrow from family and try to do better with my own kids going forward? Okay, I'll start, because I think I represent my colleague here. I don't know that we can answer that question without understanding why it is you think they took advantage of you. Based on what you've laid out right now, it doesn't sound like they took advantage of you. So what are we missing that makes you feel like they took advantage of you? Correct. So I knew the full amount when I signed for it. You know, they told me things like, you can go get a loan from a bank, but God forbid something happened while you're paying them back. You know, were your parents, we would be much more understanding of that situation. Should it present itself? And I guess it's the whole charging interest thing that I guess doesn't sit right. Okay, another question. You've paid this all back as I understand it, correct? Correct. So when did the tension arise over the interest? In the middle of it, before you started paying it back or after you got done with it? Paying the whole thing. More so after, yeah, more so after I got done with it, you know. How long after you got done with it? It was about a year after. What changed? What changed? So I'm digging here on purpose. Rachel, thank you for giving me a little way here. It's a fair question. Very fair question. So let me explain it to the audience and do you one time, and then I want you to answer this. So you paid it back. You paid back the full 18,000 and about three grand of it was the interest. Is that what I'm understanding? I was 18 and three of it was interest. That's what I'm saying. So, okay. So you paid it all back. All right. And a year after you paid it back at some point, at some day, a year after you paid it back, this started to bother you. So that tells me something happened. What happened or dare I ask who happened? So I got married a year after, a little over a year after I graduated college. And my husband and I were talking about it. And he was shocked that they charged me interest and thought it was horrible that a parent would charge a child interest on a loan. And you believed him all of a sudden. Yes. Had it occurred to you before his comment that that might be a horrible, despicable thing in someone else's eyes. Be honest. Sure. It had occurred to you. You telling me at some point you were like, this, I appreciate what my parents are doing, but I think this is a little, this is a bit shady. No, no, no, no. Sorry. Sorry. I know, I'm playing lawyer, I watch too many television shows. I can pinpoint the husband said this and because of his understandable influence on you and probably just by his sheer reaction, which he's, by the way, has every right to his opinion, this totally shifted everything. So I'm going to get out of the way and let Rachel weigh in, but I'm going to tell you my opinion now, I've gotten everything I need to know. Okay. My opinion is it's too late and I don't think there was any tension or resentment at all until your hubs opened his mouth. He has every right to open his mouth. He has every right to opine on what your parents did. I don't like how he said it because I think he should have been wiser and more mature. And if he was on the phone, I'd tell him this. He has every right to his opinion, but he's now created some tension and resentment after the fact and only from his point of view. And so for that reason, no, I don't think you should bring it up to your parents. And I think you need to figure out how to process this. Maybe it's therapy, but to create tension now, to me seems foolish. Yeah, I think what's hard for me, Lindsey, where does it not feel like they took advantage of you is because everything was upfront. If you had called and we've had these calls of people called, they said, oh my gosh, we pulled my credit report after I got married to buy a house and I had a student loan on there. My parents took out a loan. I remember signing papers at 18, but they never told me, you know, that's deceitful. People, parents that, that loan was strings attached that will give you this money, maybe for a down payment on a house, but you guys have to live this close to us. We have to see the great, you know, there's strings attached in relationships that's kind of gross. This sounds like, even though we're not for, you're exactly like, we are not for family members, the loaning money, period. But the way they did it, Lindsey, it was, it sounded very clear, very upfront. And the reason they did it from what I hear is they did it from a situation that a, it's less risk with the loan being held to them. It was not a, Hey, we're going to give you a deal. We're going to charge you. And now if the three, if the $3,000 was unreasonable interest, right? But they're charging you 50% interest and they're taking advantage of you. That's gross and weird. But did they do that? They pulled the average interest rate and they just said, Hey, just, just do the loan with us because if something happens, their words will, we can give you grace period. Like it won't hurt you financially. That's a very good point. Yeah. That's the reason they did it. It wasn't a mathematical. You're going to get a deal from us. We're going to give you this half off. So, so Lindsey, I don't think they took advantage of you. I think you knew exactly what you were signing up for. And I think that the reason they did it was so that a bank wasn't involved, but it wasn't a financial deal on their end. It was just a, Hey, here's this. Did they charge you the going rate on interest? I mean, Rachel brings us a very good point here. Well, no, so it would have been about, what is that 20% maybe? It was $1,000 for every $5,000 that I borrowed from them. Okay. All right. 24. Yeah. So that's a little bit. You're at super tight. Yes. Very. Okay. So I actually, I'm glad you brought this up, Rachel. Sorry. I know I was diving in a little bit, not try truly interrupting because I don't like that. Go can go. Okay. Well, I personally wouldn't charge my kid interest. Mm hmm. And then I get, we don't loan our kids money. Right. All right. And nor am I going to. Right. But I'm trying to put myself into this. Sure, sure. So remember the little classic? We tell you what we would do. Okay. We wouldn't do it. I think it's a little tight. I think it's a little a little tight. Sure. But they didn't do anything. But take advantage is a really strong language. I don't like that language. That feels like it was deceitful or something. I don't think they did. I am going to say though, Lindsey, I, so I have another follow up question. I can't wait for Rachel to get involved in this potentially. So the timeline for all of our viewers and listeners here, a very quick review, it was a year after you paid it off that hubs and you have the conversation, he gets, he gets upset and it affects you. How much time between that first moment where he makes the comment and this phone call today, how much time has passed? Years. We've been married for almost three years. Oh, wow. That really concerns me. I was very intrigued by this. So here we are. Are you saying three years ago is when he first got alarmed and you started questioning this deal? Three years ago. Yes. All right. Yeah. So you've been sitting on this part three years and it's been paid off for three years as well. Four. Bones been paid for. I got you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. The timeline here. So the question is, Rachel, doesn't that concern you? I'm very concerned. Concerned. What do you mean that she's just resisting? This resentment is just boiling it up. And it's just calling us. And I'm glad you called us. Yeah. And I would really. Stop talking about it. I would really, I would release it. Lindsay, I really would. I think that yes, they're probably cheap to a degree. Like I said, yeah, they're cheap, okay, but they, but they didn't do anything deceitful. No. You knew exactly what you were signing up for. And so I think it's one of those things that, again, thankfully you have the money to pay them back and all of it, but the deal is like this isn't, this is another reason, right? We don't want money. So I'm glad you've been watching the show, Lindsay, because you're exactly right. This is, I would do this because it does feel weird and it's not only does it feel weird because you owe your parents money when we talk about that, but it's also weird in this situation when you look back and you're like, oh, gross. I don't like how that felt. So like all of that is standard and just. This is the Ramsey show. Get your free every dollar budget today, the simplest way to budget for your life.
