Lower The Tone Podcast

Episode 3 - Gout and about

While Jon's busy helping out his pre-school personal trainer with her parking fines, and celebrating his podium finish for energy drink consumption; Patrick's considering whether weight loss actually suits him, and is about to pursue a career in dash-cam filming.

An episode beset by technical difficulties due to - arguably - cognitive decline and a lack or organisation skills; if only Fonzie were here to give the podcasting machine a quick elbow to get it going again.

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Duration:: 42m
Broadcast on:: 25 Jun 2024
Audio Format:: mp3

We are recording. There we go. Right. Hello, John. We're now recording after, I'd have to say 15 minutes of chatting to each other. Yeah. I don't know. Is this arguably my fault? I'll take responsibility for it. Okay. That's fine. All right. That's fine. I'll let you take responsibility. I mean, there's some of it was me. Mainly it was you. The bit of the me was the fact that I hadn't hit record. Yeah. I mean, I'd say once this becomes, once this podcast becomes popular, then maybe I'll be encouraged to invest in some recurring equipment. But John, for it to become popular, we have to release a fucking episode, don't we? We haven't released a single fucking episode yet. We're on episode three. Yeah. This is episode three, but the fourth one we've recorded. What a pair of podcasting applause. We are. I think this is a good idea to have some in the can. All right. For weeks when we can't be bothered. Yeah. That's never going to happen, Patrick. We're always bothered. That's true. For weeks when the technology is overtaking us, which does feel technology permitting will always record. Who knows? Here we are, a recording episode three. So hopefully by now, by the time we're recording this, by the time you're hearing this, Lord, well, they're going to be two episodes. I don't know what I'm saying. I feel like it's an episode, a confusing episode of Doctor Who. There will be two episodes out. And this one will be the third episode. This will be the new episode you listen to. You've listened to one. You've listened to two. No one's listened to one A because we're not releasing it. And then this is episode three. So now we're on it. The thing I think I was saying is what we don't know is what debt this is. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That was the most on my list of things to talk about. Let's stop setting ourselves tasks on a date and then not not apply to buy it because I mean, we're going to get into it in the podcast. But in the last episode, we suggested we were going to do a park run. Yeah, I know. And gave it a date and then did not release the podcast in time. Yeah. Hello, everyone. Welcome along to the lower the tone podcast, which now has a name, has a logo and hopefully has a distribution method, which hasn't happened yet. But we'll do. But I don't hear this. But we'll do new guys for finding it. Because if you're listening to this, that means all this shit has been done. I'll be honest. I don't even think Patrick at this point would have found it yet to listen to it actually on another medium other than when I send it to him as an MP3. When you're going to be released on cassette, cassette and vinyl, it was ages to press these. Do you know like cassettes are making a comeback? Does that mean that Sony, what people have now got Sony Walkmans? Yeah, they've got the old yellow orange earphones as well used to get. Do you remember the orange phone ones lasted a matter of weeks? Yeah, we had a sweat perished. Yeah, the phone would perish just due to the sweat of your ears. Yeah. Oh, rollerskating. But that's my image of someone wearing wearing a Sony Walkman, they're rollerskating like kids from fame. And as you can see, discussed the other week, Fonzi, my cultural references are a little bit out of dust. And the kids from fame, Fonzi. And then we've still never managed to pick up a different reference, didn't we? We didn't think of one. Well, yeah, exactly. So I was bang on. Yeah, bang on. Yeah. You speak of anyone that's under the age of 35, please write into us at lowerthetonepodcast at gmail.com and let us know if you remember or even know who the Fonz is. I mean, happy days was, I mean, when did it come out? When? I mean, this isn't when what years were we talking happy days? Monday, Tuesday. I think it was in the 70s, based on the 50s. Whereas I remember it being repeated. So I mean, I was born 83. So I remember it being on TV. I remember it. But I don't obviously must have been a repeat. Clearly. Yeah. But some things are timeless. Some things are timeless, Patrick. Some things are timeless. Happy days. The thing isn't happy. Happy days is not one of the things that's timeless. It was what demonstrated over the last few minutes is that it absolutely is timeless. It was made. It was made in the 70s, based in the 50s. We're still talking about it in 2024. So it is kind of timeless. Was it was it a 70s version of Saved By The Bell? Is that pretty much what Happy Days was? What was the cool guy in Saved By The Bell? It was Slater. I don't know. Saved By The Bell as well. Slater would have been Slater would have been the the cool one because he was like the the cool dude. And then there was Zack. Wasn't the who would be who would be Richie Cunningham? Okay. Well, so there's some there's some even that Saved By The Bell is quite a reference to use. When was that last out? I don't think he's got the longevity. Saved By The Bell. I don't think as many of the characters are memorable. I remember screech and that's it. You must remember Zack. Do you not remember the girl that then was in Showgirls? Showgirls are a film about a strip. That was the first thing she did. She came out Saved By The Bell when it finished and then she then she was in the film Showgirls as like a way to go. Look, I'm not I'm not this teen icon anymore. I'm now and it flopped like a terrible film. Sorry. No, I don't know that. And when it gets that starts to get to 80s, 90s, it starts to move. I think things become less memorable during that time. Only for you though. I only for you. Your opinion is that it gets less memorable. Yeah. Yeah. Once you once you get to a point where you get a job, you stop you stop watching shit that's on during the day, don't you? Well, Saved By The Bell was on the Big Breakfast. That's why I know it was in the Big Breakfast. So it was very much a morning thing. Great. Anyway, talking about breakfast. Oh, God, I'm not looking forward to the bit when we get to how much weight we've lost this week. Do you want to get it over with? Oh, do you want to just do you want to build up to it? I feel it's quite a small bit, John. I don't know. I've you know, I weighed myself this morning. Same. I weighed myself three minutes before we started this call. Yeah, right. Okay. I am fresh. Hot off the press. Hot off the press. If this if this was like a TV show that had a new a newspaper in it, they'd be like, Oh, he's coming in and I'll be running through with a piece of paper through an office to hold the front page. Weaving it. Look, look, everyone, John's lost. What is it, John? Well, BMI wise, I've gone down point two of a BMI. You got another two? No point two. That's the first dose of point two. Yeah, point two. So I'm now 36.0. I'm actually on a, I'm on a whole number. That feels like a nice round number, don't it? Just to sort of stop and leave it. That's two round, isn't it? It's two rounds. That's it. Two round round being the operative. Yeah, which is actually a, well, let's talk about it. It's two pound loss. I've done was two pounds this week. Well, well done, mate. I know. Do you know what? About a kilo. I believe so. 23 tactics, John. Well, this week, not really much. I'm going to be honest, just quite a lot more walking and exercise. So every morning, do the school run. And it didn't happen last week because it was half term. Last week was the first week back after half term. So it was actually, we did do a half an hour to walk, but we then, so now we drive to Sainsbury's and then we do the last 15 minutes. That's a hefty walk, isn't it? Just got half an hour walk to school. That's one of them that like old men talk about like through blizzards, through uphill, downhill, half an hour. Did it on the bike. You're not going to want to go to school, but by the time you've done half an hour's worth of it. No one's doing that. No one's doing that. So it has been a very much a drive for the last long while, but now there is, like I say, the car park that I normally, well, car park, the road that I park in got back to the car the day. And there was a parking, parking ward right there. Just sticking the sticker on my car. Bastard. How much? 30 quid. If you pay it now. That's a lot of pocket money for it to serve up, isn't it? I know. Yeah. This is your fault. So, Poppy, what do you want to do? If you pay it within two weeks, it's a lot less. Yeah, it's a lot less now. Looks like no one's having ice cream for the next couple of weeks from the ice cream, man. It's only eight weeks pocket money if you pay it now. I mean, that's 1599 jimmison out on now. So, bless it. Well, she won't learn well. Got to pass it down, haven't you? Give me the piggy bank to smash it on the floor, stop counting it out. Right? Well, you're still 28 pound short. It's quite short. Yes. Oh, dear. That's pretty nice of you, Johnny, to give her a lift to school. Yeah. Yeah. I was sitting in the morning. Yes. Is it part of exercise, or is it just a general all-round good guy? I'm just a general. I've been doing it for a long while, but now it's a good thing to do for exercises. It's kind of added in to the exercise regime as well. So, the parking attendant's actually done me a favor. You'd also say that after you'd been to jump giants that you considered that to be a pain in advance, that the the peer back was going to come afterwards. I think it did because if I'm honest, this week, I haven't been as strict with food as I normally would be. There's been a few takeaways. There's been a few, Jimmy, but we had a curry last night. And again, that might be waiting to just add on at some point. All right. Maybe that's the opposite side. The opposite side of the coin for the whole jump giants lay over. Maybe this curry sat there going, I'm going to add this on this week now. Maybe you need to be trampling in every week, Joe. Maybe. Maybe I should be trampling in every week. I'm going to stop it. I'm going to intervene there. It's absolutely not what you want to be doing. Yeah. Come on. Let's do you. Let's do me. I've put on since the last since the last time we were here, we recorded 0.3 of a kilogram, which is just over half a pound. Half a pound. Half a pound. Well, what did you lose last time? You lost a gram, didn't you? Was it two grams? I lost an amount that you could conceivably go to the news agents to buy some tobacco off. Didn't we reference it to the fact you're taking your wedding ring off to wake yourself. I think that's what we took out. Yeah, it was either the way of a wedding ring. You couldn't buy pasta in that level of amount. It was a jar of cheap, tesco, nasty coffee. Cheap, that's it. Yeah. Well, anyway, it's come back on a little bit. And some, don't you mean? Well, yes. Yes. Oh, yes. Oh, yeah. You're right. So this means your graph is now got an up an up an up cycle. It's got a have a slight up cycle. But that was the last time I weighed myself. So it would be gradual. It might have spiked up and down half a dozen times between. Let's say that. Yeah. So let's say that. This might be like a tiny little peak. We just don't know. But anyway, where it is right now, 10 days on from where I weighed myself last time. It's not 0.3 kilograms in excess of what it was. And what's that done to the BMI? What that has done to the BMI? Yeah. It's not, it's not, it's not done a good thing. No, of course, it hasn't ever. Well, unless you're looking for bigger numbers, obviously. Yeah. So yeah, it's gone from 31.8 to 31.2, if we're just down to the first decimal place, which I mean, at this point, I don't know why we're looking at the BMI still. It doesn't make any sense to sort of keep looking at that, does it? Because it's all, well, it doesn't when you're going up. Yeah. All the numbers, all the numbers are conspiring against me to make me look like a greedy idle bastard. And I don't know, John, I've got a spreadsheet which does back that theory up as well, quite strongly. Have you been lazy? Have you not, have you not done anything? Because last week there was, there was talk of you starting to go on bike rides. I did go on a bike ride. Oh, well done. Congratulations. Where did you go? I went to Sherwood Forest with a work friend, and we biked around Sherwood Forest. And we had a lovely time to be fair. Got a little bit sweaty. I was quite, you know what? I took, I have found, we spoke about middle age, involving some cognitive, cognitive decay. Was it decay decline? Yeah. And this morning, I was underlined that with how unorganized I was here. But I hadn't taken water. I hadn't taken any tools. I knew I had a slow puncture on the go. Any tools? Yeah, tools. You need tools, don't you? If you're on a bike ride, you knew you had a slow puncture, and you took no tools for the slow puncture. Nothing. No, spare an attube, no puncture kit, just pump it up. Just a pump. Just shove it on the back of the yell, do that in a bit, do that in a bit. Look, I had taken a helmet and the bike and myself. And that was it. That's all you really need for a bike ride. You said that. You said bare minimum, bare minimum is you bike and helmet. Correct. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Bare minimum is me and bike to be fair. I don't. Bare minimum is you bike and helmet. Okay. You and bike is bare minimum. So safety wise with helmet. But then with the knowledge that you've got a slow puncture. Yes, I should have taken the bare minimum increase. Yeah. You should have taken many of the things. Yeah. I know that I'm like a bit of a, I'm a bit of a chunky lad. I shouldn't have taken a bit of water to drink us. We're off our way around. Didn't even take any, nothing. No, it was quite, it was quite a long journey. The guy I went with accidentally, I don't know where he'd got it from, flicked up a little bit of dog shit onto his back and back while we're out. So I was able to laugh through the thirst at his misfortune as we all would do, as anyone would do. Yeah, as anyone would do. Of course, of course, why would, why would they not? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We'd normally go for a bit of a cheeky handshake off. This pump as we left, we decided against. I decided against it. This is not touching you. There's definitely dog shit. We waved him goodbye from inside my car. Goodbye. Yeah, just left him, left him for dust with one flat tire as you sped away from him as quickly as you could. It was enjoyable, but I don't know why, why is it not made any difference? Why is it not made? Probably because I'm still eating shit. That might be a reason. Oh, there we go. Is that where we're at? We're at used to leading whatever I want? Have we done a food diary? Again, there was the discussion of food diary. No. Well, here's the other thing, John, and we'll leap to this. I mean, I'm enjoying talking to you and doing a podcast, but I absolutely not. I'm not sure I want to lose weight right now anymore. For reasons which I'll come to is that last week I spent 300 quid on a suit. I didn't think it's me. Okay, so whilst I'm aware that I could do to lose weight and I were aware that the health reasons and a whole lot of others, yeah, losing weight would be a good thing. 300 quid quite a lot of money and I want to get some wear out this suit. It is, but you can get it altered. You can have them altered. You can have, I don't think you're listening, John, 300 quid on a suit. I don't know that he's going to alter that book without looking at someone's just put some bulldog clips on the inside of a bin bag in order to sort of reduce its diameter. I don't want that. So, yeah, I might just stick as I am. I'll still keep going, but I don't know that I want to win three. You can't. How long? Well, okay, let's work this out and we'll actually value wise. This is what we're going to have to do then. So, what we're talking, how many, so 300 quid? Yeah, it's a nice suit. Some are saying 10 wears is going to cost you 30 quid, 30 quid aware. If I wear it 10 times, yeah, I've also, then it would cost 30 quid. It's quite a lot though. Isn't it that 30 quid ago? Are you really going to allow? Well, I just realized what I was about to say and I've known you for so long that I know the answer. Yes. I am going to allow that, John. That's, you know, three tanks, three tanks of petrol, more than three tanks. Are you really going to, you're going to allow a monetary value to, to, to affect your, your weight loss? I mean, I'm going to be honest with you, Patrick, going from the last two weeks, you're going the wrong way and it's not going to fit anyway. No, yeah, there is. But it'll fit, it'll fit again on the way back down if I do manage to sort of. Yeah, exactly. Just going to wear it. That was particularly a point. Oh, I'm in the suit again and then stop and then all out of it. In the suits. Maybe what I need is two wardrobes, big wardrobe and aspirational wardrobe. I love all your aspirational, but actually what you've got is you've got big wardrobe and not aspirational, you've just got what I've bought now. So far, I've worn it twice. Oh, one gig, one for you. And that's good. So we're down to 240 quid left on the suit on the suit. On the suit, I went to 240 pounds left to it to get it out. Yeah, I guess what would be a fitting end to the suit is if, do you remember the closing scenes of big where he's walking back into his house? If it looks like that, if you're still wearing it when you get to that stage, that would be amazing. Yeah, it's wrapped around you twice. If I can recreate that scene, we could do that if you just put my suit on. I think it would lack any form of journey that I've just taken. For the video, we could do it today. Yeah, yeah, indeed, indeed. So hold on. So we've got episode three. Yeah. Into this. You've decided you're not losing weight anymore. It was just based on how much this is now just how much it was cost. This is now just my weight loss journey. And I talked to a friend who's just eating what he wants as long as he fits into something that cost him 300 quid. Let's be right. I mean, let's be right. So far, I mean, I've enjoyed this process and I've no intention to stop it, but so far it's becoming two minutes recording a conversation that they're having and then editing it out and then sharing it again to really listen to it. This has been the gayest thing I think I've ever done. Why would we record our own conversations? I've never done this with anybody in my way. This is what podcasting is. I don't think you realize. Yeah, no, but I'm sure there's another part to podcasting where you publish the episode. Oh, yeah. All right. There's a part two that we've not quite. Yeah, but that's coming. It's like we said, yeah, like I said, we've got them in the can. We're ready to go for, you know, we can get, at some point, if we get enough recorded, you can be, you can give it a two-week break. You can have a good week and a bad week and it just allows you to come back at the same weight. I'm keen. I need, I need to do something to reverse it. I need to do something. Yeah, you need to burn that suit. I need to burn some calories and then keep the suit for, you know, just in case. I'll have a winter, I'll paddle on a little bit more, but let's have a winter like you're a bear. So, one change I have made this week is I didn't buy nice bread in the shop. That's always a killer for me when I buy nice, seeded granular, that's a killer. On sliced? No, I usually go then to slice it. I'm not, I'm not an animal. Oh, yeah. Yeah, but they're slicing it for you. So, it's not, we're not talking like a major brand. We're talking it's baked. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then they're slicing it on those. Yeah, that's nice. I like it. Just nice. It's just like a big slug of carb that I'll pure and then butter on top of that. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, toasted loads of it. Maybe even a poached egg. Oh, my God. Yeah. Incredible. Well, poached eggs. Fine. Poached eggs. Okay, you're allowed those. Yeah. Are they not full of cholesterol bags? They probably are, but everyone eats eggs, don't they? Everyone eats eggs, which makes them all right. They're always, they're always in diets. Aren't they eggs? Like, oh, you can eat an egg. I just want to, as a bit of a disclaimer, please do get your food and diet advice from elsewhere. Everyone eats eggs. From someone, from another podcast also that doesn't suggest, oh, we're going to try and lose weight. But what are we going to do? Oh, we're not going to lose weight anymore because of bought a suit. Yeah, because of bought a suit, which is a lot of money. I'm sure anyone listens to it. There might be some people I think you could for a suit. That's nothing. Given the price of some suits that were there, I imagine there are some people thinking that, but you know, for the likes of me, who is, we're talking mid range. Is this mid range? I could have gone slightly cheaper. I could have got a lot more expensive. So, um, um, you know, for a nice suit, it's at the lower end, I think. Do you have that? Yeah. I had to go where and think about it. So I went in. Oh, did you? Oh, right. Okay. He was one of them where I think I'm not just going to spend 300 quid on a suit. I'd already, well, sorry. It was 280. I haggled him down a little bit. Did you? You haggled. Where were you? Was it in the proper suit place? I've never haggled in a suit place. It was in a proper suit place. Yeah. It was a proper suit place in the Vicki Center in town. And I went in. Do you know, I just, well, if I don't ask, he's not going to say, tell you what, mate, I'm going to give you 20 quid off. So, all right. I'll just ask, see what I can have. So, well, how much is it? It should have been 300, what, 20? No, 300. I think it was 300. Yeah, 300. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So how much was it before you got the reduction? I think it was 400. And I got it. And then he was selling it for 300 anyway. Oh. Bit of a scamp. Got an extra 20 quid off. So you got for 200? Even with that. 280 pounds. It was saying 280 pounds. Hold on. That that changes all the calculations that I've just made. I've rounded it off. Well, it's 28 quid, isn't it now? 28 quid. Yeah, it's 28. But it's just changing from two words. Yeah. It's like, yeah. So you're a long way down it now, percentage wise. This is incredible. I'm the same percentage, aren't I? Yeah. 20% down. I'm a different number. Sure. I'm trying to make sure that we actually make you lose weight on this podcast as opposed to just, yeah. Yeah. True. What's the story from Patrick this week? Basically, it's going to be a hard welcome on to the podcast. Patrick does a suit and so fit. Yes, it does. Okay. Thank you. Goodbye. So far. I mean, we'll manage a good 10 minutes talking about happy days and other things. I'm sure we can find it. We'll talk about your weight loss. Okay. Brilliant. So it's just become me now. It's just become me. Yeah. Yeah. It just, I think it would wound me if I was successful in the weight loss after having spent that. And I was thinking as I was handing the money over, thinking, yeah, this isn't going to be great if I cut if it's suddenly really baggy on me in five or six weeks time. Do you think it will? But well, maybe we should test it. How do you mean? How do you test that other than by losing weight? Sit. Yeah, exactly. In five to six weeks time, we'll try and make you lose as much weight as possible and we'll see how baggy it is on you. Yeah. This was sort of the point and the thing that I'm struggling with. I don't know if that having that as a test is good. And then, and then we can change the podcast around for season two, Patrick getting back up to the suit weight that he needs. So the suit no longer looks baggy. And I reckon we'd love to do that in about a week. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, let's let's crack on. Let's crack on with that more exercise. You know, right, as I sit here in my in my shed, through the array of wires, it's pissing it down. No, it's coming in the way of any exercise. It doesn't have to. Let's indoor exercise. Yeah. Okay. I think also at this point, just eating healthily. Yeah, true. True. It's going to make a difference. Do you find, right, that doing stand up gets in the way of your ability to eat healthily consistently? Yes. My dinner the other night was kind of cooking a tube of Pringles. About 10 o'clock at night as well. So like really late at night. Yeah. Yeah. It was that it was later than I wanted it to be. I got back and then the family had had a Chinese takeaway. So actually by going out, I did probably, I was going to say had a tub of Pringles and a Coke. I got back that I was trying to take with it, left some for me. So I had that, but that classes is tomorrow, not yesterday. I did have that. You're absolutely bang on each of each of the little plastic containers. You weren't going to say it. You weren't going to say it. You were going to try and claim that your dinner was a tube of Pringles and a catacoke. Yeah. They'd left quite a bit. It was nice. And how much was left after you'd finished? I wrapped it up. I wrapped it up and watched all the little plastic things out. I'm not trying to sort of paper over any cracks here, John. It's not great. But it is. No. Well, one of the, see, this is it. We're talking about eating after gigs. A thing that's happened recently, in probably the last month or so, is that what I get back from a gig. So all my gigs since, because AMC so much more was there till the end. So I get back about midnight, most nights. Yeah. Friday night is now become, I'll get back and Kelly will be like, she'll cook something for me to eat. It's become now for the last couple of months, mashed potato, Yorkshire pudding and gravy, just all together. Just that. Yeah. It's incredible. Honestly, he's want to try it. It's absolutely incredible. It feels like it needs a sausage or two. No, it doesn't. It doesn't. It doesn't. It honestly, it's one of the greatest things I've had when I've come home. It's like a proper stodgy, just a carby meal. It's not a good bedtime meal. Is it? Are you losing weight when you're just eating something which feels like it's off the beaner? If you're managing to lose weight on that, there must be something else. You must be not eating on the Saturday or something. That's not eating for like two days, not eating two days before the way in. Funnily enough, on that, I did have a look at fasting. Oh, yeah. Yeah. There was, and again, John, we've been down this road before, so I won't go into too much detail, had a look at it, clicked a link, answered the questions, stopped at the pair wall. That was intermittent fasting. You don't need to do, you know, there's nothing to pay for intermittent fasting. Yeah, surely just stop eating for a bit. Yeah. And it tells you when to stop eating. It feels like that. Do we decide on your times? Do we decide on your doing it? Is it nine, nine something, nine five, or whatever it is? I can't remember. How do you know when to stop fasting? When do you stop fasting? Do you then just sort of go and eat all the stuff? Because you're starving. You're not going to reach for an apple, are you? Are you? Is that what you're supposed to do? Well, you're supposed to be drinking like water and black coffee during the times that you're fasting. So you're sort of like, that's the way to do it. And then, yeah, you just, you don't eat, you can't, you can't just go right now and have to fit in 2500 calories in this four hour period. Not for me. Not for me. Not for me. Not for me. I don't know the idea of that at all. Are you just not going for a piss all the time? Well, you are. Yeah, this is another thing. I had this conversation with mum and dad did the week so that I'm always having to go at them. They don't drink enough water. And mum says, well, can't, it's like, why not? Because I thought I was going to the toilet. Yeah, that's the idea. Is it? Yeah, because you're cleaning your body out of toxins, aren't you? You sound ridiculous. What have you become? A man that's got gout is what I became. So this is why this is everything. No, gout. I mean, outside of Laurel and Hardy and Harold Lloyd films, I don't know that I've ever heard of gout in a modern, he's out from drinking too much pork, eating too much cheese. It was actually from drinking too much blue energy, blue rock star energy drinks, I think. What a millennial way to get gout from drinking energy. I think it was. It just coming red meat, all that sort of stuff. Actually, then they said it was just coming corn. So if you've been eating a lot of corn, that will do it. So I thought, I might be corn. And then I got the email from Sainsbury's saying that I was the biggest buyer of rock star blue energy drinks in the East Midlands. Was it a congratulatory email? Was it? I don't know. I'm going to find it because I've got it. I've got the I've got a picture somewhere, but yeah, it's say, um, yeah, ridiculous. Is this saying, whoa, boy, you slow down a little bit? Did they do that? Basically, no, it doesn't say that. It just goes, I don't come. Everybody said congratulations or not. Did you say we've got a special offer on a blue rock star energy drinks, did it? I've just found the, uh, that's the thing from Sainsbury's. The number one buyer of nobody bought more than you in 2023. That's a full year. That's not just a month. That's meant a year in the East Midlands. And the most worrying thing was Sainsbury's not the only place I bought it from. How intrusive are Sainsbury's that they're monitoring people and like they've got some sort of league table. This is what neck to cut. This is what neck to card does, mate. It's what neck to card does. Wow. You were the biggest user of a golden leaf tobacco. Oh, congratulations. I can't imagine you were the biggest buyer of national lottery tickets on a Wednesday. You were the biggest buyer of king size rizzlers throughout last year. And the second buyer of traffic aches. That's like, is that really intrusive? Fuck off Sainsbury. It's like getting involved in some league table. What are the tables do you want? I wonder, like, I wonder where you were, where you just missed out on the podium. Yeah. I wonder if I'm just in fourth place on something. That's the, you know, tell all you're in the, you're, you're in the top 10. Yeah, you're in the top 10 of kitchen roll. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. Like good things. What good things have I bought? Apples. Yeah. Well, no. Yeah. Well, there we go. Well done, Sainsbury's, you know, spy in the eye. And so, yeah, that's good if you've stopped them. I don't think they're particularly good things. I mean, it's been, how long has it been now? I've been off them since not January. So, I haven't, I haven't drank an energy drink since January. Okay, not good. I guess go. That is a bit of a wake up call. It's a massive wake up call. And the fact that it was just like, well, how do I get rid of it? And they went, oh, you can, you can take a pill every morning. That means you just won't get it. Oh, really? Yeah. Well, I was like, I want that. And he went, oh, I think you should try and change it with your diet. All right. And I was like, no, give me the pill. Give me the magic pill. Give me the pill. So there's a magic pill that stops you getting it. And then there's the pill to reduce the inflammation that you can have. And that allows you to then obviously put socks and shoes on. That allows you to become a member of society. Yeah. I'd like the magic pill, please, that stops me from getting this horrible inflamed toe that I've got. Oh, man, that sounds painful. It was painful, but, you know, don't drink blue rock style blue energy drinks is basically, well, don't don't have be the most unhealthy person that you can be. This feels like a real, like, rude to Damascus style change for you, John, that you've, you've turned your life around, energy drinks have gone. I mean, admittedly, most of your exercise is thanks to the, the, having a six year old as a personal trainer, it seems, it wasn't for the existence of Poppy in your life. You'd not be walking to the school, you'd not be going to jump giants. I don't know that anything changed. So have you got any, have you got any weight loss plans for the week coming up? I'm just going to continue what I'm doing. I think I'm going to eat healthily and more healthy. I'm going to, I'm going to try and cut down on any of the, I'm not going to have a takeaway this week. So it's Monday of the, I'm already suggesting I'm not out of takeaway yet. It's 11 o'clock. Well done, John. Well done. Really good going. Now, for a Monday at 11 o'clock, not even had fish and chips yet. Ridiculous. Yeah, exactly. So that's the plan. No, what I've realized, my, I mean, living in the, in the, in the comedy industry, there's, you know, living in the gig, in the gig world. Yeah. I'm much better at, I'm much better at losing weight when I haven't been paid for stuff. Austerity, austerity in all forms does really have some benefits. What, what a nightmare it is when you're on 30, 31 day invoice and then all those, all those invoices coming on one day. Oh God, that day is great. What a day. I'm going to do my month's worth of eating now. Have you paid rent? No, but I am eating a takeaway for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Nice. Oh, well done. Yeah, yeah. You just crack on what you do with all your big old weight loss, John. Well done. Yeah. What are you, what are you going to do? Yeah, that's a very good question. I am good. How are you going to maintain? How are you going to maintain is the question. I'm going on another bike ride on Saturday. Now, here's the other thing close related. I don't want to sort of over go over this point. I've got to buy some new, some new biking talks to go back you with because the last time I was out biking regularly was last year and I've put on a bit since then. So I have tried on the t-shirts that I used to wear then. And do you remember little Britain where Matt Lucas used to do the only game the village sketch was where he used to wear his micro that was patently too small, then yeah, there was that. I looked quite a lot like that. And that's not a good look. So I'm going to have to go and buy some cheap cheap. Or, or whether suit. I could wear the suit. That fits. You could wear the suit. And he also takes them off. He's supposed to be quite a hard wearing suit without looking credible. I think we've exactly, we've got around the issue. If you have to buy more Lycra is you just now wear the suit. And that also, if you go biking this weekend next week, that's two more wares that we've got out of it. So we're already down. Yeah, yeah. If I'm 10, look to funerals in a suit that's covered in mud and oil. Some wood, some wood. And dog shits, dog shits. And dog shits, yeah. That does look slightly disrespectful, doesn't it? Also, there's more pockets on the suit than there is on the Lycra. So you can get more tools in that inside pocket. You can put a little punch and repair kit in there. I mean, I think it's, tear that pocket square out, drop it in a tube in. That's what we've got. Multifunctional. Multifunctional. And today also, I mean, this sort of flies in the face of things. Today is the day that I get my dash cam fitted. So I'm going to spend a significant amount of time this week driving round, looking for no beds, hopefully in front of me. Too stupid things. What you're not spending on suit, you're spending on petrol as you just drive around. Yeah, just looking for idiots. I don't know, I don't know what I'm going to do with the footage once I've got it, but I'm hoping to collect it. Probably the same as what we do with this podcast. It'll send it to me. And then, and that's it. That's it. Just talk about it. I don't know why I'm so excited about it. It's one of them things that probably I'll get fitted, and then everyone in front of me will just drive absolutely normally. So I am going to be probably moving around less. Just driving around. Are you feeling it yourself? Are you getting fitted properly? Well, part of the gift was to have it fitted. So the person who bought me, I said person, that's my beautiful wife bought me it, and also bought fitting, because she knows I'm not particularly clever at things like that. Come with a special tool to tick trim off in your car. I'm not going to do that. No, I'm not doing that. I used to, in one of my very first jobs, when I worked in IT, we were also in charge of all communications, and we had to fit car kits. We had to fit the in-phone car kits for everyone's cars at the company. Well, you have to do the amount of time. Yeah, I had to do that, yeah. So I know how to take a car. I don't have to take a trim off and all sorts of stuff and fit these things in. I remember I fitted one in the Jaguar of the CEO of the business. He had to fit his for him, and the Jaguar's like, they do this thing where the seats come all the way back to let you get out of the car easier. So you'd stop the engine, and the seats were going to go back. So then you can get out, and then when you get back in, they go back to the original position. The CEO of the business was probably about five foot six. Okay. And I had slightly shot of the average. Is that right? That was six foot six 21 stone man that's doing it. Yeah, okay. And then so I'm in the car, fit the car kit. Perfect. Right. I best test it, sit in the driver's seat, turn the engine on so that everything powers up. And then the seats just started moving. It was like, do you know, in star walls where the walls start to close? It was being crushed. You can still just stop it. It's being crushed against a steering wheel. How long before someone came and spoke? Just against the windscreen, just like in Bill and Ted's excellent adventures. So they've pushed up against it like, no, yeah, it was fun. Okay, there we go. So more evidence to not do things yourself. So the people are half of it. And then that's going to occupy the very least my afternoon. Yeah. Well, there you go. Well, so it's taken out of how you're going to sit around. You're going to do the typical middle age man thing and look as a doing it be like, Oh, yeah. Look over the shoulders. I'm sort of hoping I can just piss off somewhere for a bit. Okay, that's fine. I didn't know where you're going to be that guy. I might get £1.50 McDonald's coffee. Oh, is that you're going to go for coffee? Yeah, maybe. Yeah, I just got to sit and have a coffee, wait for them to do it, get excited. Maybe plan a route. Maybe look for some accident plan a route plan a route back home, like literally plan a route back home. That's what I'm doing. You don't need you don't need to drive through the middle of Derby and notting them to get home. That's what I'm doing. I think you're fine. I do. Also, I'll go have to drive past PC will for an extra SD card. What type of places do you think could be better for for sort of gathering fools? It's got it's got to be city centres, city centres and roundabouts, isn't it? It's got to be roundabouts. One of those like confusing roundabouts were maybe the, you should take it, you should take it to come off if the pin markings have come off. So it's not massively obvious. Yes, they're supposed to be in there. The ones you need where there's loads of different exits. The type of thing where someone would be justifiably confused and then when this one blends, I can be there on my arm. What are you doing? You're fucking idiot. You need to find somewhere where a new road layout ahead. That's what you need. You need a new road layout ahead. A change of priorities. That's what you need. It's always motorways. Motorways is always a good one because there's always people undercutting overcating, undertaking, cutting in front, all that sort of rubbish. But roundabouts is the fun one, isn't it? Yeah, so that's me today on roundabouts, all day. Your car's going to end up looking like a golf ball with all dents you're going to get in it just as you're trying to start road traffic accidents. The other thing, and I don't think I've exploited this enough or at all really is I've got a GoPro, I've got a bike, everyone hits cyclists. So just being out with that, I'm sure. Get on the Jeremy Vine train. Well, what was that? What was the Jeremy Vine train? There was a viral video of him cycling through London and it was just getting abused. Just people abusing him. No, it's interesting because he's a cyclist or because he's Jeremy Vine. Because he was a cyclist, I don't think they knew it was Jeremy Vine. So it was just people just going, like literally just cars driving past him like too close, just shouting at him. I think I want to end the podcast now so I can go find that. Okay, that's fine. I want a place to end it. Thanks. Thanks a lot for listening. Who knows, by this time next week in day format, we might have an episode available to listen to online. I hope so. That would be amazing. But if you have been listening, thank you so much. LowerTheTone@gmail.com/podcast@gmail.com. We'll probably have a Facebook set up as well, maybe. We'd just like to hear from you. Just drop us over and drop us anything in. Clearly, we need a little bit of advice to take us further forward. And yeah. Well, you do. Yeah. All right. Yeah. Okay. Just got a six-year-old personal trainer. He doesn't need any advice. [laughter] [music] [BLANK_AUDIO]