Archive.fm

WBCA Podcasts

Observations From The Trenches

Host Larry Higginbottom expresses how there are no requirements for parenthood, the aftermath of having a child without resources and the burden on the community, the resources to consider before having a child, 5 crucial pillars to childhood development, & more.

Duration:
54m
Broadcast on:
24 Jul 2024
Audio Format:
mp3

Host Larry Higginbottom expresses how there are no requirements for parenthood, the aftermath of having a child without resources and the burden on the community, the resources to consider before having a child, 5 crucial pillars to childhood development, & more.

The following commentary does not necessarily reflect the views of the staff and management of WBCA or the Boston Neighborhood Network. If you would like to express another opinion you can address your comments to Boston Neighborhood Network, 302-5 Washington Street, Boston, Massachusetts, 02119. To arrange a time for your own commentary you can call WBCA at 617-708-3215 or email radio at bnnmedia.org. I'm here Boston again I'm your host Larry Kingbottom and you're listening to WBCA 102.9 FM. Again WBCA 102.9 FM. Name is our chat is called from the trenches baby. I opted to make some trenches from the trenches. Again I'm the founder of those fires group we are a local Mid-heft Clinic here in the city for the last two decades providing in-home support to families who are going to a very trying and sometimes problematic issues in the home. We come in and try to assist them in getting things back on track but also looking at what's not working but also gives them ideas on what they can do to make things better. If I believe when the home is functioning at its best those kids come out with a different disposition I better attitude and the whole community is better off and when they have not been properly home trained or groomed or nurtured they come out in community and all hell break loose. You know my topic for the day I got from one of my former contractors who worked at those fires about 10 or 15 years ago and she said something to me very very profound I wouldn't really pay attention to the time. Because you know we in folks home we get to see how them is a ferry. He said you know something Larry, parenthood. There's no requirement for it. There's no requirement for being a parent. I didn't pay my attention to it at the time. I said yeah yeah you write about that. I've been out here now for over a quarter of a century, 25 years. And I can say without no reservation therein lies the crux of our problem. The beginning. The incubator. The home. Is that order. So I want to have a conversation put out atmosphere. I'm not into blame, gloom and doom. Life comes in final days. I'm not into that. I'm about to look at it. Okay what must I do to make things better? What must I do to improve my current situation by being real and I was with myself. So at the top of the day is real simple. Panhood. No requirements are necessary. Panhood. No requirements are necessary. And as I've given some thought this here the last couple of weeks. The things I've come to realize in all these 25 years out of here. The one the worst mistake that we as a community aid us community. Back in blacks. Fundamental blacks. Whatever term you want to use to speak to my group. American born blacks. The worst decision we ever made got involved into was thinking that a parenting out of wetlock was okay. Without any kind of commitment any kind of knowledge wisdom finances. It was okay to be a single parent. It's okay to impregnate these ladies without no resources. And so that being in case I really wanted to put out into the atmosphere in my thoughts from seeing firsthand the aftermath of that poor choice on our as the community. So my top of the day is real simple. Parenthood. No requirements are necessary. And I'm not here and to blame it. We got time for that. We're too far behind. But that I'm not here to point fingers. I'm not here to say who's at fault. No, no. We're too far behind for that neighbor. We need to be under with ourselves. About the poor choice dance the poor choice now. And we need to be telling those future parents, right? Why they need to abstain from this very strenuous position of being somebody's mom or dad. It's one of the most important position that you will ever ever embark upon. And it's 24/7, 365. You don't put it down. And you can't send them back. And we're not seeing them being out here in the trenches, right? I'm sure many of you have you seen it too. The last 30-40 years. Young man who impregnated young ladies ladies and young ladies who become pregnant. Let me say this here very clearly. If neither of you have any form of birth control, he don't have he don't have a condom. We're not on no kind of birth control. There's a pretty darn good chance that you are going to become impregnated. There's a pretty darn good chance that he's going to become a father. This video is what it is. So again, all this here is preventable. All this here is something that you can control because why you have control of your sexual libido. These things just don't magically happen without your environment. But when you go there and be carelessly, be carelessly engaged and see a sexual act, you already know you stay at home with your mama or your property there. You already know that they're feeding, closing, and housing you. You accidentally bust money or meal money or lunch money or whatever. But you go there because you want to get your groove on because you think you now, you know, semi-grown, you got to go on because not community over the last 40 years, it's been overly, overly sexualized with young people. You feel that is your obligation, you know, to get into grown-up activities at such a young age. So over the 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 18 and 18 and 18 doesn't matter. You have no resources, you have no resources whatsoever. You are an add, you are a liability. And so when you go out there and get this young lady impregnated, you already know that you can't afford her pampers. You know, he already knows you can't afford the similar, the similar like milk that's very expensive milk these, these infant require. You should know it. I think you don't know it because there's no conversation on, on like prevent anymore in a household. It is very, very little where I'm saying. So you already noticed you had a, you know, just a bandit. This young lady who you impregnated, she at home too, with her mama. And this other siblings, other siblings in the house with her. And it ain't like, you know, things are flowing, it ain't like you're very comfortable. So you already know, all right, that you can't afford this child either. You can't afford to be a single mom. And I can say this to your two, two young people. And this is what you ought to share to those who are listening. What I've seen firsthand out here, if you become a mother of father between 14 and 20, that other, your other counterpart, he or she would be gone before you 25. Before you 25, you are with no longer be a couple. So you end up in the end, carrying this burden by yourself anyway. That's why I say, we need to really look at the formation of these homes. That's why I say parenthood. No requirements are necessary. So here you went in and committed a grown up act with the resources of a juvenile. You don't have your own space. You're not working. You haven't finished school. So you got no skills. You have no idea about the future. You have no idea how America works. And so now you're thrusting to a grown up position with maturity of a juvenile. And so foolishly, the last 40 years, what the state and the government have done, giving you through Section 8 food stamps, you know, it allows you to start a home or get an apartment with no resource of your own. No resource of your own. You have no skin in the game. So what's being divided is nothing being divided from your actual skill set or your actual labor or your actual endeavor. And so the state in the name of being benevolent and doing good have actually opened the door for some very poor behavior to exist. And it's decimated. Decimated. The adults community, black American community, fundamental community, whatever term you want to use, it has decimated us. Do you have a severe bottom cast of people stuck on that bottom? When this year, ill-advised activity that we went down this path about 50 years ago once King's murder. Because we're not gonna realize being out here. These are five pillows that any young person need to have a good shot at life. The first began, who conceived you? The first, say, pillar is your parents, the people who conceived you. So if they didn't know anything, they had no wisdom, no resources, had no idea what a parent is all about. The sacrifice he had to make, you know, how to discipline, how to cultivate, how to create, you know, healthy environment. If they have no idea how to do those things, you're gonna be the recipient of what they lack. So number one, pillar to you to your development is those who conceive you. Number two is gonna be your peers. The peers that you associate with, are their parents saying the same thing and modeling the same thing that your parents are modeling? So if your parents are modeling good habits, work ethics, boundaries, expectation, okay, disciplining, healthy, healthy, disciplining, okay, your needs are more than that, okay, teaching you to love a learning, all right. So are your peers that you associate with? Are their parents also, it's still in the name, those same type of attributes? So again, your peers also is important to your development. Another thing is the home environment. The home that you come out of, what is the culture in that home? What's the culture in that home? Have your parents thought to introduce you to the love of learning by reading to you? Have you read it in? Do you know your ABCs? Have you learned, you know, colors, shapes? Can you count to a hundred? Have you been allowed to read to them and they to you? Do they use vocabulary and not profanity or boba language? The type of music that they are allowed to play is a wholesome music, nurturing music, right, invigorating music? Or is it this trash that's out here now? So the culture in the home is also important to your development. The fourth element is the community. Does the community reflect what your parents are saying in the home? Or is it a toxic community? Will you subject to see all kind of nonsense going on? Violence, urban decay, urban blight, rundown, building? So the community also plays the part in your development. Does it also enhance what your parents are trying to instill in the house? And the fifth pillar to your development is the school. What caliber school are you attending? Is it high functioning, high motivating or high standards? Is it foundation based on excellent or the pursuit thereof? Or is it underperforming or low achieving with many of the student body, right? I also coming out of less than desirable home settings. Those five things add to a young person's start in life. It's a good indicator as to where he's she will be heading. So when you have individual who become parents and don't meet just a minimum requirement, those kids are not gonna do well. And what I'm seeing out in the last quarter century, the white American along what he said, "Boulee educated Negroes" is not kind of realized. When the worst sin that happened in the last 50 years would it give the members of my group, Ados, advanced degree, PhD, masters, because common sense and wisdom, common sense and preservation has left the room. And they have embraced all these social engineering tactics that there's been disastrous to our community. We've already struck them before. But at least before we had a sense of morals, values, boundaries, structure, respect, discipline, some dos and don'ts. Now is just do you baby. Be who you are. Who you to judge me. Who you to judge me. Don't be a player hater. And when you hear those, what I call the default statement, what you're hearing firsthand is individuals who do not want to be held accountable or responsible for the things they say and they do. Don't be a player hater. You got to order. Who you to judge me. You got to order. Don't hate. Those statements in the last 30-40 years have allowed individuals, I hate in our community, to be irresponsible and not be held accountable for some of the despicable behavior that they present. And that's why my topic today is real simple. Panhood. No requirements unnecessary. What do you think about that? No requirements unnecessary. You don't send them back. You can't send them back. And in a way, you think about it. The people who conceived you, it's like potluck. You had no say so in that. You had no say so who became your parents or who your parents are. Not whatsoever. It's like a look at the drawing and you're going to go pretty much as far as the building block, the building block that they set for you. Because they set the building block. Are you being nurtured, provided, cared for, cared for, loved? Are you being still disciplined? Ambition. Work ethics. Boundaries. All those characteristic, your parents start to build those things than you. No one is born with that. So depending on who can save you, would determine how you start up in life. And I can see after being out in the trench of the last 25 years, that they say, I lately wrote a book about the prison industrial complex. I think her name was Elle Exandra. She stated that she called the school the prison pipeline. No, no, no. She put it back up. I call it the home to prison pipeline. Why is that Larry? Because everything starts there. When that young kid went into kindergarten in first grade, he was already behind. He couldn't read on grade level, because he wasn't reading. That's when part of his repertoire at home. He did not know, he didn't know ABCs, couldn't not count, had no idea what colors or shapes were, or even how to engage in what I call group play, how to take your turn in activities. All those characteristics, their parents who are on their JOB, started to instill and develop in their children. This young man, a young woman, right? He comes into K-1 in first grade without that foundational orientation. And to add to the mix, he might be in the class, you know, 20, 30 kids, what third or more have the same challenges that he present. What much get done? Because the teacher is spending most of their time trying to get older, trying to get these young men and young ladies, right? To pay attention where they can do some instructive teaching. And what I found out here, that you won't be engaged in learning if you lack the fundamentals on how to comprehend what you're reading or what being said to you. Because your vocabulary is full of vulgar and profanities. Your mechanism is, you know, full of emotional strife. You know how to strike back temper tantrum. You know how to be defiant. Because those who conceive you had no idea of how to develop and cultivate in you the characteristic that you was going to need to excel out here in the largest society. When you think about it, neighbor, your kid and mine is our gift to the world, is our gift to the community. And based on the job that we have done or not done, they will be viewed as an asset or liability. I think we all can agree to last 45 years that quite a few of our young people. Not all, thank God, thank God for that. Not all. Despite what you see on the 6th and 11 p.m. news, thank God not all of our eight of them is our function that way. But far too many are. So as the real kid being viewed as a gift to the community, he/she really becomes a tyrant. They really become right, you know, a burden on the community. Because they're engaging all kind of, right, bad behavior that causes your community to become one enmeshed in violence, chaos, and confusion. Because when you conceive this child, you had no idea the enormous task that now set before you. How do I begin to develop and also nurture, cultivate, and prepare this young man or young woman to be an asset in our community? And it all goes back to who can see you. That's why it feels like a look at the drill. And so that's why I said for my dialogue today, it's real simple. Parenthood, no requirements are necessary. They're in life the crux of the problem. The problem is not the child that was conceived of that deed. The problem is those who conceived him had no idea what was needed to nurture, develop, and cultivate that young man or young woman. And that young man or young woman, that child, he got what those two parents could give them, not much. I've also found, but being out here for the last quarter century, that those two young folks who conceived that baby, their parents didn't get much. They didn't get much. And so they are just emulating what they have been given. And so I say it's time for the 80s community, black American community, fundamental blacks, and reading the black American Hebrews, whatever term you want to use. It's time for to be uncomfortable ourselves, candle for ourselves, not hear the blame, shame, guilt trip, but to say, hey, we went the wrong way. We went the wrong way. And when you start to get back to standard, you're too young to be for comfy be a father. You're too young to be a mother, period. And in 2020, for the last 30, 40 years, they've been all kind of innovation and contraception, all kind of innovation. So there's no need for anyone to become a parent, because you have in sex. It's not even a little need for that. But because many too often take no responsibility for their act, you don't care. Here comes life. And we really add insult to entry to me. Now you're going to have a baby shower. He's staying home with you. You're struggling. You can report that he's not doing well in school. He might be attending school. You're going to have a baby shower knowing that you got two or three, two or two, two or three of the kids in the house. There's two or three of the kids in the house already with her. And she, it depends on you to give, to give you, for you to give her a lot of money, but money, allowances if you can. But you want to throw a baby shower if those something great has occurred. I don't understand that. When in most cases, this new life that these two young people have brought forth with no consideration of the long term implication, now you're celebrating life and neither one of you can afford it. Because you can blame it. You got you complaining that you got to take care of him. Other parents can plan. They got to take care of the young lady. But now you want to throw a baby shower as though we had done something the right way. And by these false affirmations, you're encouraging bad behavior. You're encouraging bad behavior by throwing these baby showers. And so as I look around and I see this phenomenon, I say, what's wrong with this picture? It's like you've done something that neither party can afford, neither party. And it adds a burden on the home that you already in because why you already underfunded, under resource. Come on now. So it's time for black American community to start to shop on the rafter. We need some prevent here. We need some prevent because these parents, I'm not doing a great job of a paying your kids for life ahead. These parents, you call them parents, but they really the kids. 18 19 20. What do you know? Come on, be a real. What do you know about being somebody's mother or father? It's 17 18 19 even 20 21. You just get started. You trying to figure out who you are? But now you got this here. Bundled joy. It requires 24 7 365 attention and resources. Come on now. We are hurting ourselves. There's some things we as a community should definitely put our foot down decades of go to say no, no, no, no, no, no, ain't happening. No, no, we don't condone that nonsense. No, you're not ready. There was nothing wrong with the child coming to the world. You would not really assume to assume that role of mother and father. We should have never cosigned. Shacking up. The calling it is because it like sex without it's like sex without without obligation. It's like getting the benefits of a husband, right? You the boyfriend or the old man. Bad move. I can say bad move. I'm the father of the daughter. She's 33. But I made it very, very clear throughout her life along with her mother. We ain't having that. I was, I won't stand on the bible station to version. I won't say that, but she knew one day no popping over there. Pop is not going for oopsie, oops, oops, oops, oops, no, oops, my butt. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You cannot try to climb this mountain of life. In 1718 or 19 or 18 or 18 or 20 and you got a child. You try to be a young father. Are you kidding me? You come out of home with no wealth, which meant there's no inheritance. You started from scratch, but now you are a young dad or young mother. All you doing is adding stress and strain to her and to yourself. And then in the end, the burden falls back on your mom or your family to pick up a slack because you was irresponsible. Because nobody said no, we don't do. We don't co-sign that in that nonsense. Because you still have control over your sexual libido. You got control over there. In 2020 though, there's no need for no one to become a parent. Just on the oopsie tip. Unacceptable. It is devastated our community. It's devastated our community. You see these folks here on TikTok, these young men of women doing the gang sign, you know, and they prepared to die at 19, 21, 21, 22, 23, trying to be a bad boy or a bad girl. Come on now. That comes back to those who conceived them by the order. Shouldn't have what we shouldn't have went down that road. Anyway, I'm your host, I'm your host Larry Higginbottom. You listen to WBCA 102.9 FM in WBCA 102.9 FM, name of the show from the trenches, baby, off the basement trenches. I'm gonna take a break. I'll be right back to continue my thoughts, but this ain't working. This is not working. I'll see you every turn. The revolution wasn't televised in the 60s. Is it going to be televised in the 90s? Well, you know, the catchphrase, what that was all about, the revolution when I was talking about, that was about the fact that the first change that takes places in your mind, you have to change your mind before you change the way you live and the way you move. So when we said that the revolution would not be televised, we were saying that the thing that's going to change people is something that no one will ever be able to capture on film. It'll just be something that you see and all of a sudden you realize I'm on the wrong page or I'm on the right page but I'm on the wrong note and I've got to get in sync with everyone else to understand what's happening in this country. But I think that the black Americans have been the only real that hard Americans here because we the only ones who carry the process through the process, that everyone else has to sort of like skip stages. We're the ones who march, we're the ones who carry the Bible, we're the ones who carry the flag, we're the ones who try to go through the courts and being born American didn't seem to matter because we were born American but we still had to fight for what we were looking for and we still had to go through those channels and those processes. People won't give you the real talk on drugs but it's time we know the facts. Fentanyl is killing people. It's a powerful opioid often made illegally and commonly mixed with illicit drugs. It can even be pressed into counterfeit pills that resemble prescription medications. Just two milligrams about the size of a few grains of sand can potentially be lethal. This isn't an ad to scare you but it isn't an ad to make you think twice. Get the facts. Go to realdealonfentanyl.com. This message is brought to you by the ad council. Again, here's that song again for the hundredth time today. Here's that song again. It's gonna be stuck in your head all day. Here's that song again. It will make you cray cray. You love your kids enough to watch that TV show a budgillion times. Love them enough to make sure they're in the right car seat for their age and size. Show them you love them. Keep them safe. Visit nhtsa.gov/therightseat brought to you by the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration and the ad council. The impact of a meal goes well beyond feeding our bodies because when people don't have to worry about where their next meal is coming from they can truly thrive like Marta. And now we'll hear from our class valedictorian who with our hard work never ceases to amaze us. Please welcome Marta Moreno. And Alex. Hey Alex, how did the interview go? I did it. I got the job. I can't believe it. I knew it. Let's meet up later to celebrate. And Diego. Mom, I got first place at the Science Fair with my volcano project. That's amazing sweetie. Congratulations. Because when people are fed, futures are nourished and everyone deserves to live a full life. Join the movement to end hunger at feedingamerica.org/actnow. Feedingamerica.org/actnow. A public service announcement brought to you by Feeding America and the ad council. The revolution wasn't televised in the 60s. Is it going to be televised in the 90s? Well you know the catchphrase, what that was all about, the revolution we're not going to be talking about. That was about the fact that first change that takes place is in your mind. You have to change your mind before you change the way you live and the way you move. So when we said that the revolution would not be televised, we were saying that the thing that's going to change people is something that no one will ever be able to capture on film. It'll just be something that you see and all of a sudden you realize I'm on the wrong page or I'm on the right page but I'm on the wrong note and I've got to get in sync with everyone else to understand what's happening in this country. But I think that the Black Americans have been the only real that hard Americans here because we're the only ones who carry the process through the process that everyone else has to sort of like skip stages. We're the ones who marched, we're the ones who carried the Bible, we're the ones who carried the flag, we're the ones who tried to go through the courts and being born American didn't seem to matter because we were born American but we still had to fight for what we were looking for and we still had to go through those channels and those processes. I'm back, Boston. Again, I'm your host Larry Hingham Bottom, native of my program, op-servation from the trenches. Again, op-servation from the trenches. Well, speak about things I see out here for the last 25 plus years. There really needs to change. It's not about blame, shaming, guilt trip, nope, nope, too late for that, too far behind. We need some prevent. A friend of mine brought to my mind about 15 years ago, so Larry at the time she was working for me, she said, Larry, here's the problem here. Today's parent, there's no requirement to be a parent, there's no requirement to be a parent. And I sent him off the other day and this thought came to me, parenthood. No requirements are required. Parenthood, no requirements are required. And the reason why I always end and start with that little interview by brother Gil Skuyerman, the revolution, would not be televised. He defined what he meant when he wrote that song back in the '70s to admire a crime. The revolution would not be televised. He said it was supposed to be something that starts in your mind. The revolution starts in your mind. The revolution starts in your mind. There's no group activity. There's no marching down main street. You start to realize that you're on the wrong page. You're going the wrong way. If I had two over, almost three or four decades ago, the revolution started in my mind. Everybody benefited from that evolution of me evolving. I'm seeing to you today and you know I'm not lying either. Parents, it all starts with who can see you. Kids get what they have. If they were not properly nurtured, cared for, disciplined, right? Love showed opportunities what could be. They're not going to do well. And so that product, you know, that they have to do, it comes out with a severe disadvantage. Because as I said earlier, it's like the luck of the draw. You can't pick your parents. I couldn't. You couldn't. And so if they, because they are being just immature and just foolish, decide to procreate at 16, 17, 18 or even 21, stand at home with their mama or their daddy. And they're being cared for, divided for by their parent. They are in no position to be anybody's parent. So the issue is not the child that they have conceived, you would never ready. And over the last 40 years, our community has condoned and affirmed and cosigned that foodie behavior was now the norm. I read stats and you probably heard it too with 7% of our kids are raised in single-parent households. Unheard of in my day. Unheard of. And it was at the height of white violence, at the height of white terrorism. That's what it was. We've been terrorized by whiteness. But those people have standards, a code of ethics, a code of conduct, some do's and don'ts. And when the do's and don'ts, you're not going to embarrass the family name. You ain't gonna do that. The male's new. Forget the female. The male's new. You would have some control over your sexual libido. My father told me when I reached about 13 or 14, I could hear Cliff's day, he's the Larry. Do not make me a grandparent until you can't afford to take care of that child. I say again, he said, Larry, do not make me a grandparent until you can't afford to take care of that child. He wouldn't blame it. So I never did it. None of them are brothers. And most of them are male friends. They need to get rid of pregnant, doing our teens. Unheard of. What happened to our community? Why do we start to listen to these social scientists who says, okay, why did we leave our standards and those those beliefs that got us through all this here, white terrorism? No, there was terrorism. And at the end of the day, it is as normal as walking to the park. And being out here in the trenches the last 25 plus years, I was going to say with no reservation, we went the wrong way. We really did. And as my friend said to me decades ago, there's no requirement. And therein lies the chief problem. There's no requirement to be a parent. Again, no requirements are necessary. No wisdom. No housing provisions. No employment. Okay, nothing. As long as you can procreate, you can become somebody's mom and dad. Entitled. In theory anyway. Because then what I'm seeing out in the trenches, that responsibility falls back on their parents. I got families that I worked with or seen. They had been a parent all their life. They raised their children. They raised their children and children. Now they raised their children and children. Now they raised their children and children and children. They had been a parent their entire adult life. Because they didn't get anything. They didn't get it. And you can't pass what you never got. So I'm saying to the Aetles community, a magma more black, fundamental blacks, a regional black American with the term you want to use. We've gone too far to even think about shame and blame. No, we're too far behind to think about that. We need some prevent. We need to start the stress to our young people. That you cannot climb this mountain mounting with a baby on your back. You can't pursue. You come out of the homes where there's no wealth and there's no inheritance. So you're starting from square zero to begin with. And now you get to think about how you're going to a provide for this newborn who did not actually be here because of your killedness and your recklessness. Here he is. We need to really demand better behavior for my people. And we need to stop condoning bad choices before they become bad choices. By reiterating to our young people, you have control over your sexual libido. There are too many products on the market that will prevent you from becoming a dad or a mom at 15, 17, 18 or even 2021 when you stand at home or if you are working, you just can start it. You see the Boston. It's very expensive. So again, you can climb that mountain trying to be somebody's mother or somebody's father. It's time consuming because financing, finance, emotional maturity, physical, stamina. And so why are we doing something that is kind of productive to us? And our community does not call us out on this behavior. It's not guilt tripping. It's not shaming. It's not even pointing to things. It's simply saying you are doing something out of order. Life has order. And when you do things in order, it's a smooth transition. When you do things out of order, you struggle. You stumble. There's difficulty. And when you have our young people continually doing things that are out of order, the whole community struggle. Because why? We're going to be recipient of that child coming out at 14, 15, 17, 19 or 20 with no skills that no social graces, right? For the hostility. And now they're terrorizing us. They're terrorizing the place that you call home or the community when they're terrorizing your children. Most do not do well in school. That's fact. That's fact. So we need to start to demand a high level of behavior for myself. So get white folks. They're going to do what white folks do. I'm not worried about them. It's 20, 24. I'm not worried about whiteness. I'm not worried about that. I thought we should be on us. And I would say it's 2024 for the next 76 years in this century. Hey, those, we return our attention inward on ourself, on ourself. And to remove those things from our pathways that we know are counterproductive. And parenthood, those who enter this arena, ill apparent, ill prepared, no maturity, no wisdom, no resources. We don't do well. The community in the end pays the price for this year. You'll advise creation. Because most of the young, young men and young women, right? They don't do well. Because while they're not being nurtured and parented, they thrive out in America, in the community. That's the one who's been out there for 20 plus years, seeing firsthand. Just ain't working. This is not working. So I wanted to say, to our community that I love and expect, it allowed me to thrive and prosper and be here that I am not condemning. But I am saying, it's time for us to say, no, no, that kind of behavior, that kind of suggestion, those kind of choices are just not good. And no, we're not going to, we're not going to fall into, don't be a player here. No, no, no, we ain't hating. Y'all don't. And because we care and love you, we're going to say, y'all don't. And it shouldn't be done. And we should not accept things that we know, that we already know, it's going to be a struggle or detriment to that person. Because in the end, we're not hurting us. Because why? Those kids now will come out to the community and we're going to get what we're not giving to them, which may have. It is what it is. You know, ain't lying. You know I'm not lying. So it's time for us to understand that parenthood should have requirements. Parenthood should have requirements that you have to meet. And as a parent, it's incumbent incumbent incumbent up on you to make sure that your children understand, you don't be nobody's mother or father until you have those requirements. You don't have those requirements being the parents should be the last thing in your mind. Instead, you should be about trying to get your skill on and not your groove on. Because in America, if you have essential high income skills, you're going to do well. If you don't, you're going to struggle. And I can tend to be not in the trenches for the last 25 plus years, too often I'm struggling from making bad choices as 15, 18 or 19 or 2021. You wasn't ready, baby, to be a parent. You wasn't ready. And most we're not doing well in school to begin with. Because of the home they came out of, because why their parents never did well in school. Here's what it is. So we need to demand excellence. We do demand better behavior, better choices. And we need to call people, our people our own bad choices. Your life affects me. Those kids you see out here, on TikTok, you know, running them up, doing the game sign, you know, looting, doing whatever. Thank God and all. Thank God and all. Well, guess what? Because they were not parented properly. They hurt the community. You had none to do with conceiving them, but in the end, you are hurt by that bad choice. Because why that young couple should have never brought forth life. They were not ready. Period. They were not ready. So I wind down my little dialogue today. Remember, man, parents who should have requirements, parents who should have requirements. Instead of parenthood, no requirements are necessary. Parenthood should have requirements. It's up to you to instill that in your children. You know you ain't ready. You know you're not ready to be a father or a mother. We must instill. They're not kids. That's our job as their parents. To make sure that we mold and shape them to make good, healthy decision. And that's something going to hurt the entire community. And then you're left to lock them up. If they don't get themselves killed, come on now. It's time for a different message. And the message is we must have requirements for parenthood. That's under you must teach your children. It comes from you because you are their teacher. You are their role model. So as I wind down today, hope to enjoy my conversation. Again, I'm your host Larry Higginbottom. You listen to WBCA 102.9 FM. They might show observation from the trenches. That's right. Hop, surveyion from the trenches. That's right. Hop, surveyion from the trenches. Hop, surveyion. And for my observation from the trenches for the last 25 years, some of the trends that we now see as you know everyday trends, we should have never walked down this road. And teen pregnancy, single parenthood, is a road that we should have never walked down as a people. Because the effect has been devastation. If you think of mine, it's going into these Facebook, TikTok. Look at the young man. Look at him in gangs flashing the signs. The young ladies twicken. The gorgeous, they're beautiful. But their mind is bankrupt. Their mind is undeveloped. And America is not kind to fools who are uneducated, unskilled, unneeded, and lawless. I'll say it again, for those in the back row. Our country, ados, is not kind to folks who are uneducated, unskilled, lawless, and foolish. It does not treat you well. Never have never will. Because our relationship is based on what? Anti-Blackness. Don't be fooled now. Don't be fooled. Don't hurt yourself. Stop doing things that hurt yourself. And when you come out here and become somebody's mom or dad, at 15, 17, 18, even 8, 21, knowing the harm we had to chew, to have the mental, financial, emotional, spiritual resources to do the job, you do yourself and the community a disservice. So it's time for us to have standards. Because we know it ain't working. We say it ain't working. So again, until next Wednesday, once you stay safe, you know, take well, take care of yourself and your family. But this is one thing we need to really need to say, "Hey, nope, we've seen enough of this here." It ain't working. So again, until next Wednesday, God bless you. I'll be back with some more ops of basement trenches. That's right, op basement trenches. Till then, take care. The proceeding commentary does not necessarily reflect the views of the staff and management of WBCA or the Boston Neighborhood Network. If you would like to express another opinion, you can address your comments to Boston Neighborhood Network, 302-5 Washington Street, Boston, Massachusetts, 02119. To arrange a time for your own commentary, you can call WBCA at 617-708-3215 or email radio@bnandmedia.org.