Seated With Lebo and Thato Rampedi
Family Dynamics Uncovered: Navigating Boundaries, Roles, and Traditions
[Music] Yo, what's up guys? It is your favorite podcast, "Seats It With Lebo" and "Tato Rambe de Moley Me You Tube Baby" Oh yes, oh yes, it is another week with us and of course guys, if you guys are new, "Seats It" is a platform where we uplift while being, have a bit of loft, have a bit of insights from an older brother and a younger brother and just genuine banter and stuff Yeah, so we really enjoy having uncomfortable conversations that people are scared to have every single day We believe that when we were younger, we wished that we could speak about certain things and this podcast started off just being, check for vibes, that we still read funny tweets but we kept breaking into conversation like, you're like, "Oh, do you care cool?" We're talking about funny things moms do but like, my mom made me feel like this noise younger, you know? So we love having uncomfortable conversations in a light-hearted manner, light-hearted manner and let's see it baby, yeah, so grab your favorite seat guys and let's get started but of course I don't tell you guys the theme, so "Tato" is actually playing out this podcast today We take turns-ish, I took the last two As I want to ask you guys, this is getting very, very difficult coming up with these episodes I am requesting the audience's help, like, I need everybody to put in topics, conversations, themes, moods, touch on Yeah, because I personally like, I'm vloggy, I'm spoken about this, I'm spoken about that so I really appreciate you guys' help but today, I want to speak about family in our teens family in our 20s, family when we are students versus family when we're working I want to speak about how do we tell our parents, like, no to family holidays, how do we integrate our parents and cousins to family holidays as a man, like, how do you become a leader within your family because, you know, as young boys, we see our fathers and our uncles leading the family but now I'm 20, 70, 25 Like, what are our roles and responsibilities in our late 20s, what happens to us in our 30s, like, I just want to touch on, like, African customs I feel like, there's so many customs in our African culture that we don't know Like, if I had to direct now, liberal has no idea what the first step to do is I probably call Kaiser Chiefs when you're playing, assuming you'd have heard I'm so dead, and on top of that guys, I want to speak about some roles of the first born, the middle child, the last born And it's going to be a really, really cool conversation, but before we get into the how I use, I want to tell you guys something You guys can now watch our Spotify videos on Spotify I know what you're saying, I was like, what? I was Spotify videos on Spotify Spotify now has video, baby, so you can watch the videos that we're posting right here on YouTube on Spotify, too It's not just for audio, and on top of that, if you are a young content creator, even an old content creator, someone who thinks about creating a podcast Spotify for partcourses is the app that you should download today, guys, it can help you literally start from the beginning, all the way to the end And help you distribute your podcast, so definitely check that out, and our past 12 episodes now are on video on Spotify 12, baby, moving, so I appreciate you guys watching the video on Spotify, too And of course, guys, if you've guys never given us a review, please give us 5 stars, if you're gonna give us 3 stars, give us 5 stars, but tell us why You're gonna give us 3 stars If you know Southern Comfort, the smooth whiskey base with stone fruits and spices, you know that you can mix it just about anything Lemonade, cola, or even just orange juice Yes, you can mix it, must have the chance to mix it up with you and your mates Because Southern Comfort is giving away a house point You can vet it at 100,000 with DJ Chaotic on that dance, baby, and invest your original spirit by a bottle of Southern Comfort to enter Details installed, Southern Comfort, so tasteful, so original Drink responsibly, not for self or persons, under the age of 18 How are you, man, love? Sorry, I don't know how literally singing the dance song, I'll be like, "You're giving it away, you're giving it away?" How are you, man? Yo, we've been seeing the kids come up with the new lingo, ugly, young boy Yeah What shall we, how are you? Who's that we, who's that we, where are you? Where are you going, what's the goal? I love how English is just like a, it's one of the few, all languages, actually just are constantly just developing Evolving, yeah, but like we're always getting a new language, new lingo, like per year per month actually Even ask that what we do now with our friends is like, "Yes, Papa, how are you?" Let's go, let's move, let's move, let's go, what's that play? Yeah, so fully booked, fully booked, fully booked So basically speaking in short sentences, like very short sentences And they all are like based on motivating us to do something like, "Yes, Papa, let's go, what's happening?" Talk to me, talk to me, talk fast, movements, movements Yeah, brother, how are you? How am I, what's it mean? I'll go first today I'm okay I am, today I'm okay, I think My mindset is just like, yo, let's just do anything but sit down and lay in bed Like, I don't want to lay in bed, I'm exhausted by the way But I just don't want to lay in bed today, I just want to go chill Like, like super chill, super low-key vibes Like, talking about very intimate vibes But overall, I'm okay I'm, "Hey, me and my boys into spurt" Yeah, it still wasn't made up, so I'm spurt That was fine, you get that story You go for it, you go for it Okay, so we were just chilling, I know a very random thing of us You guys wouldn't be like, "What?" But, you know, my boys are just chilling, we're working And we just said, "You know what, guys?" Let's just tell everyone on the group channel Let's just meet at spurt tonight Let's just have dinner together So, I love spurt I love spurt Percy loves spurt I love spurt Honsé doesn't like spurt See you love spurt See you doesn't like spurt See you doesn't like spurt Yeah, right So, basically, we're a big friendship group We mentioned in the previous podcast with Percy And the guys are like, "Dude, where are we going?" Why are we going into spurt? Like, we love spurt It shows you how beautiful the brotherhood is Because they're like, "Yo, bro, I want to see you guys" So, I'll just get some wins But yeah, win to spurt See, there's a lot of fun So, that was a lot of fun Seeing my boys is going to find a lot of love a lot Instead, that's two by two Yeah, I vote I vote I vote for Sam For Sam But yeah, it's just a great time Just had a great time Yeah, man, it was a lot of fun I also enjoyed just today, like, we literally shot a podcast first Yeah And I'm just shooting the podcast with Percy We invited some friends Win to Spurt And then after we came back to my place And like Play crazy, eh Play crazy, like, I've been really tired So I was like, I tried something new last night And it was such a funny experience Yeah, I agree We had a good time And it was just really cool being around friends and family So, even me, like, I'm good, bro I'm happy Very grateful I'm learning a lot about myself, too Like, my eyes go right all the time And I hate it, because it seems like I'm grand I like, I'll let them just do this right thing and then stop But I've realized that, like, Bro, I'm actually You always do look like you're crying on this podcast I hate it so much Because during the cutouts, it's like Yo, Tato's going through so much There's no way it's going out of his life, but yeah And what I'm saying is also deep So it's worse Okay, go ahead Like, I've been seen that I'm like, I'm tired, I'm exhausted Like, I keep telling myself that I'm okay and fine But there's actually, like, a bunch of shit that is not grand Yeah So our experience last night Helped me realize that I need to spend more time by myself And stop chasing, like, experiences with friends or girls And stuff like that So this thing, for me, was such an amazing experience Because, okay, cool, wait Like, okay I'm seeing, like, these things Like, I'm seeing, like, a lot of people have been pulled away from me And it's like, God assisting us The cost of I've had this It's showing me that, like, I've had some people that I mean that I don't need Yeah You just, it's just Everyone has access to you It's like an access to me and these people aren't bringing anything to the table So, being alone in a study when I was a study, I was two by two It was like, oh, okay, cool, damn, like Yeah, I can be alone And I'm fine That's why I need to start practicing You get what I'm saying? Obviously, it's just difficult because you're seeing two by two I can be alone Because now you feel like you're the starting people in this peak No But, like, it was really, really good I had a really good time And I think it's so important First to have moments where We realize the importance of us being alone Yeah And, like, it can be with friends But then you've got a partner with you But it's like, you're with friends and there's no partner So that was really nice, bro I think, sorry, I also have something like a really important lesson that I've learned Yesterday Sorry Okay, cool, sorry So, an important lesson I learned yesterday was Which is very crazy Because I feel like whenever I'm with the guys Because I get so happy I realize, oh no, life can actually be Life is good Life can be really great, you know And yesterday told me Because I've been having, like, the worst week ever But, the rest of the day told me that, like, dude Life is about day by day Yeah I think I've been trying to live my life in, like, week by week Saying, okay, cool, when I get to Friday, when I get to Friday, when I get to Friday But I'm realizing that way so much energy It weighs so much, like, presence Like, I'm never present in anything If I just say to myself, you're day by day Let me just try to have a good day today If it doesn't work out, chop There's still tomorrow Tomorrow, tomorrow I can swim Tomorrow, I might be able to have that day You know what I'm saying It's a very, very, very nice, very nice lesson It's a good mindset Yeah You know what I do, yeah I always think back to high school And, like, I ask my parents to go out And they'd say no And I get so mad at missing out that experience Like, their experiences, like, how many years ago? Nine years ago, ten years ago And I wanted this so badly And now I've gone through ten years of experiences And how can, like, and they've been amazing How can I be stressed about today being a bad day? Yeah None of that makes sense Yeah, I like what Andre said, also, is like Yo, but tomorrow could always, like, always be better, though Yeah I love that thing Like, tomorrow could always be better Yeah But, yo, guys, with a lot of our mindsets I think it all derives, obviously, from the theme of today's podcast Which is family Yeah Yeah, guys, so I took care of all those guys My eyes go red And you guys keep making it seem like I'm not a cake Yeah And I'm really sensitive eyes But, like, they're better now Also, we've been burning, like, a lot of them people In accounts in the apartment So, I think the smallest is just getting to me But, yeah Must be that Must be that 100% Because even these windows are closed, bro That's what goes to actually coming into the room To the eyes, yeah So, what's happening is that we want to speak about family in our teens We want to speak about family when we are, like, you know, in university and family now Because I feel like it's such different experiences, bro Yeah Like, I know when I was a teenager, like, family for me I was never really explained to, like, what family is It's, I've got a mom, I've got a dad I've got a brother, I've got a sister But I never really was told my roles As a first born Until I was, like, 13 Until you just started working as a child worker Yeah, I became a child laborer, a child worker At age 11 And I was an au pair I was an au pair I was a babysitter, a chef, chef Vienna specialist Security guard French Poloniest Bro, I just had to make eggs Yeah, to teach, yeah Anyways, yeah For me, the experience is different But let's speak about how was it like for you being, like, a mini child? I like when we have these conversations Because we can see how our parents Techniques grow over time But we're taught to say this is what I will say Yeah Me, my life in my teens was very strict My father was very hard on me I like to think that he was actually The hardest on his sons Very, very hard on his sons Because he saw a little bit of us in, you know Each of us, so he sees a little bit of himself in each of us And, you know, my mom was also just very much like, you know She was a very loving woman and very present woman But, again, she was also a working woman, you know We as black kids We don't have the privilege of having our parents come See us at 2 p.m. when we come back from school We see them go with 6-7 Then they cook, deny, we help them cook, deny They're fighting the... They're fighting capitalism every single day Capitalism and the post effects of our parents Yeah, day after day Yeah, so we don't have the privilege of spending as much time for our parents So for me, my siblings were... Because I was a middle child My siblings were a huge part of what my family is So, I'm not saying my parents were not excluded from this But I didn't see them a lot My siblings were my real, like, everything my family Yeah, my mother was more like a kid-taker Yeah, my mom was more of a kid-taker I see her once in a while, like, every... I see every day, obviously She cook for you, she's killing me But we never have conversations If we do have a conversation, it's like less than 30 minutes Less than an hour, you know So it's not a thing of me and my mom was sitting down It was big and chilling in the couch She'd be maybe watching the show My dad comes home, I go to my room Boom, you know what I'm saying? But yeah, so my siblings were a big part of what family is to me I don't know for you how that was, yeah I felt like I was alone in my teens Because the same experience But then her younger brother, her younger sister They were best friends I was the older brother So for me, it's like a thing of like Okay, I've got these two people Under me, I have to take care of them Make sure that they're fine Because those other two are trying to... To make other three... To make us all suffer To poison that, oh, I didn't avoid it So let's take talk with this guy He's like the eldest child And he's talking to like his younger siblings And they're like Why are you being so mad at you? Are you being so dramatic? And he's like, I went to war for you I went to war, I suffered For you to be able to have mental health clear For you to have pumping skin Please say your parents love you out loud I went to war for you You know, I think it's very hard When you're growing up And you're seeing Your younger siblings get the best part Yeah You know, I'm a mental child I always have a younger sibling Tada is too Yeah, 100% Yeah, so So what I was saying is that like So I was so... It was not close to level As she was growing up And on top of that My parents are very strict And the obviously they're struggling to balance like Working and like being motherly And like conversations and stuff But they're still doing a very good job Yeah So I have to now be that protection Of okay, cool If my mom is doing something toxic My dad's doing something toxic Someone must absorb Someone must, yeah Someone must absorb And try and block out level She was from being hurt, you know Keep on, we're still getting dripped on Even if I'm doing that, I'm absorbed Even if I'm doing something Come on, come on, come on, come on I can only fight so much You can only take so much damage I'm the person who even reasons With my, with my parents I'd be like, yo I understand that you're upset at level But maybe you should consider this, this, this And like, think about ABC Or like, well I get that she upstairs, she would Maybe she'd consider this, this, this Yeah You know So there was my role throughout my teens It stole my role to this day So cool They basically have like Three They have like, they have like an inside man To speak to Like for me and for me Directly Like for example, like If my, everyone's talking to my mom Something about my dad Something that he can't say Like he wants him to relax a bit He can kind of send me And I can be like, yo, dude, chill And then they will chill You know what I'm saying? You guys have an inside man So I wouldn't call it an inside man So Tutto was like, for a long period of time Before I started working with those things Tutto was basically my parents Like, so what do I mean by my parents with me He was like the emotional, supportive You know, that role The roles that my parents really provide My parents were, were huge Unlike providing needs And And best schools Best schools And et cetera So on the finance backing They were like Impeccable, but obviously emotional There was always a disconnect We've always spoken about it We all have acknowledged it We all are aware of it I don't think it's A secret Anything that's a secret, you know You know, so Tutto for me was like my like Not only my older brother But also like a parental figure in my life Because He my like everything that I was going to go through I'm seeing my brother Ready to go through it So it was very, very nice Having older sibling I think it's actually quite a huge blessing for me I speak to my friends Who were like Only child And they have such a different level of experience Because their parents become their siblings You know That's cool though It's amazing It's literally amazing You get all the love That you're supposed to come up From like from your parents I told her like What would you prefer? Would you prefer? Because she knows my relationship Of my siblings, et cetera So would you prefer having my siblings Or having your parents as close to it She's like yeah I really wish I had some people my age Which goes to show Will never be 100% happy with family And I've seen that change a lot As time goes So obviously like Primary and high school I wasn't close to you guys University comes My sister's very young She's not on my responsibility anymore Because You know like I'm not dating my main university So I can't protect and lead her I can't protect and lead you So now I go to this phase Where I basically don't have that day to day Actually my siblings anymore I'm starting to form relationships that I had with you guys With outside world with friends and people Then I go through life Basically with algae guys And we grow apart And now it's like You go home every six months And you see Oh shit I got a batola It's like oh shit My sister's group moves It's like oh shit My sister likes boys now That's weird You get what I'm saying? So then family becomes like oh damn And then your parents Now also start drilling the idea And the concept that You're the firstborn And you have to lead by example So whatever your marks are now Whatever your experiences now Whatever you do now It's gonna make labor And she will fall in the suit So you can't afford to mess Which by the way Is not true At all Yeah I don't think Guys parents like to have this idea That's why What is true? I don't think so I think it's true Kaitan why do you think it's not true? So I'm my sister's older sibling And my marks were probably Divided by two of her marks And she was like the smartest And Tatos marks were not as great Tatos would be a liar My high school marks Even any of my marks Yeah he was not that great So she compared to my sister And she was the youngest And she was the one Actually said it's in the way My brother, my dad really She said to us Why can't you be like your sister? You know what I'm saying? Yeah true So it's not always the first born child Sometimes I like to call it the golden child I think it was a reverse psychology thing Right? Yeah So we did badly Guys badly for our parents Like 60s and 70s By the way So we did badly in high school university My sister saw how much trouble we got into She was like She was like no I can't be my life He said no That guy's just slipped in four days The guy's just slipped in four days This guy's being washed and told this time Yeah So my sister was literally like She a hyper-focused on So she could enjoy She was a robber like a work now Work now in two holidays Which explains why When now she's older She's more of a play now Work later time Because of the pressure of your family Actually determines your behavior sometimes Yeah Because labor for example In high school was a horrible student I was a horrible student And now I'm the hardest worker And then now I think When he did his undergrad He literally flew at UP He never sucked He never failed Yeah Possed everything That way in my bag My dad was still like what the f*** It's good My dad was so confused Biggest thing is That's also another thing about being a middle child But we'll get into that Yeah, yeah, yeah So obviously my experience changed now When I was like in university And then now it's the weirdest thing Now I feel like You know like Family dynamic is so weird I haven't mentioned my parents at all During the You know The teen phase Into the university phase But now In the I'm working phase I'm successful phase It's so weird Because my parents literally want A relationship with me so badly And it's like I get you guys When a relationship with me But it's like guys I've never had a relationship with you So I didn't even know how to navigate it Like I know my mom would love for me To visit frequently My dad would love for me To constantly come to him for advice On like what I'm doing And I am currently struggling to do that Because it's like Do I initiate it? Do they initiate it? Do I want to do it? This feeling feels so weird And I'm really struggling with that And the cool thing about Also like This time now Is that Now I'm close to the level Because I'm 27, he's 25 So close to me You know he like Relatively like Brains developed He's brain fully developed in April this year Because you know The brain only fully developed in year 25 Another Yeah So he's brain fully developed This is it And he can delete We can talk now And it's weird for me, bro Because Even on the level now Because he's very sensitive Compared to me I'm also sensitive But like I'm just I'm like my dad I'm like dude, come on Let's get things done And he's just Like My brother's so strict on me Then it's like It shouldn't be like that Because we're basically the same age now So like Why is it that My brother's strict on me And for me it's weird Because like I'll see him like Vento our friends Then I'm like Is this guy actually like Being serious? Maybe he's sad I'm like Oh shit I need to be softer Then I'm like How do I be softer to this guy? I think I think it's such a I think A lot of people Won't have the privilege of it But Being friends With your family members Is a different Type of Relationship You know I'm my friends My mom I'm my friends With my dad You know And he made it clear And when we're growing up I'll pick up sick I'm a friend I'm a friend I'm a friend I'm a friend My sister and I Are barely friends Nowadays We used to be very close But we're like Bailey friends But we are friends And I think that Obviously that Balance between friendship And family-ness Is so weird for me Because sometimes We chilling I'm like Oh that's my guy Like that's my boy Yeah But then I'm like Oh that's so my brother Yeah So it's so my brother You know what I'm saying? Yeah But yeah I think Sorry I want to go back to What you said About how you know Now your parents Obviously now Wanting this relationship With you and etc I want to say for the viewers Back at home We have maybe this relationship With the Family members You know You guys are talking every day And etc And maybe you feel the opposite Of that You don't want to be closer You want to actually be further I'll pause You know These are the type of Things that we need To start discussing As the youth How do we manage our families? Our parents are getting older Yeah We're going to become As Sato said the new Leaders of our family And we're going to know Need to know how to manage Multiple personalities I think our parents have done That for a long time Yeah You know They're probably tired Yeah So I think it's very important to now Start showing that you have opinions And views When it comes to family conversations You know I don't agree with A And if they tell you Hey you're not allowed to agree with A You're still young To be speaking at the Table by the way Yeah Am I wrong? No you're right bro And it's like That's another thing with my With my parents bro Like I hate it so much too Like I don't know if it's a power dynamic But like My parents will never truly make me feel Like my opinion is like Worth listening to A year Do you know what I'm saying? Like though Like we'll be at a dinner table We'll be having conversations I'll speak in the know Look at each other And just be there like I can basically hear them say To each other I instantly are Yeah Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah And it's difficult Because like bro I'm 27 Like I've Built a life for myself I need you guys to have Conversations with me They look at it They're looking at a 27 year old And saying He doesn't know the next 30 years Goes crazy Do you understand what I'm saying? So When parents speak You know They fail to express By the way I've Been there Said that line To my parents as well And I was young as well But you'll see But they don't want to tell you What Specifically you'll see Because they want you to go Through life yourself And become your own person You know I think I think we're very hard On our parents Because We perceived them I told someone There's a Proceed them to put We put them on this pedestal Yeah Of perfectionism And like People are supposed to be perfect But they also Human beings No but they're very close to perfect And let me tell you Why are they close to perfect? How? Good certain things How? They're close to perfect This was my sister They're close to perfect Because They have more life experiences So like for example When you're younger And your mom could say Oh no this friend is not going to last It's because she had a friend like that So they're not speaking based off Of just being perfect They're speaking from a point of They've gone through their stuff Which is why I respect their opinion so much When it comes to friends Finances and stuff like that But yeah bro It's very difficult to navigate I know like for us for example My father And mother saw this gap In connection And then they started like You know same we should do weekly I'm sorry Monthly Lunches So now we sit every month Then we go out for lunch Or dinner We have a conversation And that's nice But I know friends I see they Like I'm talking to this girl Bro she sees She goes to a family house every three days And she'll be like Yo I missed my mom so much I miss my nephews and nieces And she like basically has to go there Because she feels like I haven't seen them in so long But I feel like for us It's easier because we have each other That's how all this is like my My parents best gift to me I was in my siblings Outside of education was my siblings You know Cause it's like okay cool I'm not gonna have a close relationship With my father and my mother But then at least I'll call my brother You know what I'm saying And we've been able to She don't feel a sense of family I feel a sense of family Yeah Which is why I'm so Which is why I deep Like my male friendship so much Because it's like I've been able to cultivate the relationship with my brother When Percy comes Like I basically see her brother And I know how hard it can be like You know what I'm saying You know how good it can get And how good it can get And it's like That's also another reason why I was so anti Like having a family Having kids Giving a wife It's because I never really got to experience Like A Westernized version Of what family looks like Where you can speak to your father Or something Where you go fishing Or You can wake up on Christmas In like pyjamas and stuff And this gives So it's like your papa dude My penis is too large What does that mean? I like to just go I never had that right Or like even jokes Or like you know But I think I love that you bring this up And I think a lot of years Or really Deeply understand when I say that We punish our future selves Of the hurt and pain caused By others of our past So we will go through these families Where we're not seen We lack identity Someone is pushing narratives on us We don't have a voice in our own home And picture that For someone in our homes And say I would hate to give that That's what's going on Because that's what we identify Family as long So now we say Oh when I have a family It's going to be Very similar That's all you know Yeah It is very sad To punish your future self And not give yourself the opportunity To say to yourself I might have The family that I actually want Yeah You know what I'm saying Not real Yeah I still want the friend The other day And we were like watching It reminds you I never watch YouTube alone Right Yeah All ones YouTube with like friends So I'm sharing with this With this friend of mine And then They open up YouTube And then they play I think I either I played Suboombansa Or she played Suboombansa Or Suboombansa was on her feed And see what basically Speaking about like How he's going to the journey Of getting married And how he basically knew nothing And it's like That's another thing That I'm worried about When it comes to like Our African culture We spoke about it earlier It's like When are our points going to Teach us The steps of Getting married The steps of a funeral The steps of Like mitigated Let's say you have a relationship Problem with your wife And you involve the family The elements of our parents are dead I am the family now So if you come with Problem about your wife And your wife involves Her dad I have to represent you So how do I How do I like you know Now they turn it up They need to go to a goat on Sunday He's like Oh they're like Fourteen boxes of them and that It's the same thing Okay I didn't say that But yeah It's like Things like that Bro like Even like at a wedding Or There's no tashes in this area Like I think he's describing himself So like for example At like a At a funeral If a man dies You mean to kill A male goat Or a male cow So And then if a woman dies You mean to kill a A female cow It's like We learn those things by Just hearing By the way that might not even be true You don't even know We don't even know if it's true But it's true I'm telling you So it's like My thing is like As the generation now That is curious Like how do we combat that? Do we go to our parents And ultimately can you teach us? Because I tried and said Yo you guys I said to my parents Three or five years ago I'm like I was doing a bad job At transferring culture Yeah you did say that He was just like that Yeah and do like It was in a car Do you like no dude Like even us We're learning like on the On the girl Does it happen I'm like oh how's that? How big is this? There's a problem Yeah you being less productive Yeah like teach me Like you should say Oh my boy Let me tell you about This thing Yeah you need to do this first Yeah like let me like Let's sit down Because if you can pay for me To go to school And you see the value of education You should also see the value Of educating me on my African culture Like why are we killing cows? What happened? What is it? Besides catering What is Why do we have to kill it? Why does the family have Like we don't know these answers Yeah also like What are the colors of a spitty Like a bit I have no duties Not blue and white Is that why not? You see that's what I'm saying But my point is I don't know Dude I grew up in the I grew up in the birds Bro You know what I'm saying? Yeah that's my point I grew up in the birds So that's one thing that like I know I want to really Just I think I'm going to teach myself At this point Like I'm going to watch YouTube videos Read books about it Because I think It's so important for us To really like Understand our culture Because now Dude imagine you Imagine you were in the goal Like you sing a goal Imagine you're guys kids And they just like Hi dad Skintoshlox Just going to be speaking Skintoshlox Skintoshlox Like you know what I'm saying Like even ask like All spitties Oh really shit Don't learn Zinte Call him one more Zinte But we just need to rock full instead Even You hear what I'm saying? Yeah I guess It's scary bro Like we're literally becoming America Yeah we're literally slowly becoming America We're becoming America dude We haven't even spoken Vanac once on this podcast That's how you know Yeah we could know The things that How can we speak with Vanac Belly speak with Vanac To each other Yeah See what I'm saying It's very scary And I think that You know you meet these people And they're like Yeah how would you feel If your kids Didn't speak Vanac Yeah You know They just spoke English Yeah I always say to the people I'm like I actually don't even like Mine Because I speak English every day bro Speaking English Once in a while I make a joke at Vanac But I speak English Every Single day I dream in English What language do you dream in? In vendor I'm sure your head eats go crazy Okay so I've got a game for you Yeah It's basically just to break the Not to break the ad But to break the conversation a bit Make it a bit lighthearted Because everyone is saying People are saying they missed all the podcast You know that Really? Now it's like well I don't Yeah I like this one So I like this one Okay so this basically To get some inside on level Quick fast Use your family members for this one Okay Right Who's most likely to leave And you guys can do the same Pack at home Yeah so on set the same time Yeah so you guys can say Your own family members Maybe let them know You can send them a link saying Guys You can try this out Poor boys right now And let's play it together Let's all do it together You guys ready? We'll do it in five Remember I mixed the first TikTok Onswing discussions with family members Tag guys, tag guys Tag guys I'll send you something cool Yeah okay Okay let's go Five Four Three Two Okay so I'm gonna give you the answers Right Like the options So who's most likely to leave The dirty socks on the floor Mom Dad First born Middle child Youngest child Middle child Yeah so yourself Yeah me Yeah Awesome Who's the Middle child or lost born? Middle child or lost born right? Shibu I'm speaking in general now No no speaking in general Oh my family Yeah yeah Yeah then middle child Okay Who's the family resident tech expert? Your dad? All the sun? Middle sun? Sister? I'd say me in tatatay I'd say me in tatatay But I'd say more tatay Thank you Yeah So first born son Yeah Technically, technically speaking Yeah I don't know I'm very I think I'm better of laptops than tatay But technically overall like speaker Like let's say a speaker disconnect or something They're not gonna ask me to do that But if like there's a laptop problem and stuff I think they're gonna call me Yeah They're gonna call me You know what I'm saying? Yeah I don't know I'll say tatayay Yeah Okay Who's always there for family gatherings? The teenager, the youngest child, the mom, dad Youngest child and mom Yeah Youngest child And mind you it's very important for each other to attend the younger child as a girl Yeah my mom and my sister Who's the master of excuses for not doing chores? Second born, youngest child, the mom, dad First born First born First born, that's a certain age They just retire from chores I don't know what's up with that And it's weird Because if I just allows it It's like what? I thought we were all in this together I stopped doing chores when I realized We're in a workers union Formulated by the eldest child And he just leaves the union And says by the way You guys can do the chores with her And I'm just gonna chill Like what? A chair Okay Who's the family's worst cook? Dad, mom, oldest child Youngest child Middleborn I don't know Okay I'll tell you the best cook Because my mom Second best cook I'd say is my dad And then my sister And then is you And then I'm your title I cook, I cook though I actually do cook like Do you get a name, three things you've cooked? I can cook a pasta, I can cook stew I can cook the rice Pass the spaghetti with me I can cook So don't forget me Love us spaghetti Okay All right I can cook everything though I can cook it Tell me the steps of making an octave Right now I don't know what to do I don't know what to do I don't know what to do How long does it take? She takes me like an hour or two Okay Yeah What's the family's resident? Who's the family's resident peace keeper? No child Peace keeper No child, yeah Mom, the middle child, oldest child If I had to say Who keeps our family together Power for far I'd say it's my mother and I Okay I control the siblings She controls the husband [Laughing] They did us Okay My mom guys She will be Furiated with the children that she has And she won't call everyone She'll call me And she'll say You bloody this, this, that, that And say you better speak to But from that She's scared of us She's terrified of her [Laughing] That's how I knew Like my dad's blood Really lies and tutter in my sister Not me Like me It's like a majority of me is my mother But tutter in my sister A majority of them is my dad You can see they like my dad Okay And she's terrified of her So she'll send me and I'll be like a Peace maker Be like hey guys Yeah Who's always losing things? The youngest child The teenager My mom and I My mom and I Again Again [Laughing] We're the same person So this will be like Where are my glasses? I will be like Oh I'm waiting So the world is gonna So I'm like I haven't seen these in weeks Bro Yeah Okay Who's the family's biggest goof This boy It's a time to tie between you And my father I say my father's No even above me I think my dad is In those spaces Because I'm very quiet I'm very much more quiet Okay Who's always giving unsolicited advice Three, two, one Father Father Yeah Even if you don't ask for it Yeah You know my father's the type of person If you switch on the TV And then the TV doesn't switch on fast enough He says Come here Let me show you So This This remote Yeah Nah It has the function of You see here in this class It has a receiver When you press up Left Right The receiver doesn't catch Yeah The remote You need to point Switch it on And then you know And you're just there like I know how to switch on the TV But he wants to make sure you know how the best way The best way Decision to you No mistakes, Papa Yeah Okay 100% Thank you for that Yeah Thank you guys at home Also I hope you guys took your answers down You called just siblings You asked them the same questions Yeah And remember, tag us If you guys asked you siblings Then like, recorded and stuff Yeah Yeah Southern comfort Some of us know that Soko has partnered up with DJKI One original spirit with another If you know Southern comfort The smooth whiskey base with stone fruits and spices You know that you can mix it just about anything Lemonade, cola Or even just orange juice Yes, you can mix it My standard chance to mix it up with you and your mates Because Because Southern comfort is giving away a house point The venue that 100,000 ran with DJKI On that desk baby And a very spoken to your original spirit By a bottle of Southern comfort to enter Details installed Southern comfort So tasteful, soul original Drink responsibly Not for self or persons Under the age of 18 Yeah, but a lot has been happening with family, bro And I'm just happy that like we're trying, right It's all about just us Understanding it and then from there we're gonna take a chance Like I take a chance to Try and combat it I know that I'm gonna try Be closer to my mom and my dad I wanna visit more frequently, I'm gonna try But like we're trying to do a new segment To do another podcast guys Where we speak about what's happening Like on cross-social media And yeah man, we've been seeing some really cool things I mean you can you can start us off Yeah, so I saw Mignac, Mignac, Mignac, Mignac, Mignac, Mignac, Mignac and PD jokes They made a series of couples, content, clips Very hilarious stuff on TikTok I wanted to shout out them Because I thought that was a very very I love when two big content creators Dedicates time to make more than one TikTok together Like it's a series We get to grow with you Enjoy the content See the relationship Reference previous videos So shout out to them I love the topics that they handled Like when you still angry at your partner But you love them And like you'll put your like jersey around them I love that What would I have added? What would I have added to that skits On those skits? I don't think anything You guys killed it It was very good Also I've been sitting on a lot of like collaboration like Between content creators And every time I see people People be like You're a bro like You know We just really love ASM And we want to do the same thing I think it's also so beautiful To see like people seeing The importance of working as a team Like How much you can grow each individual in the team Yeah in the team Like I'm so excited to see the new Like Versions of group channels Like we really Once South Africa and Africa That have like Multiple group channels Multiple collectors Because it just makes it so much fun Yeah Makes it competitive Makes it really exciting And it just preeds New original content Which you have many minds Working together I think the boys RSA did it Long ago And we all slept Well some people like Well obviously people loved them And etc But we just saw You know Kids from the same You know like Who are just growing up together on YouTube It wasn't a thing of like It's a co-lab Between like people Oh yeah Because they're creating Because these guys were schooled together They were friends They lived in the same state Oh yeah they weren't Or they weren't originally all content Yeah they're just friends Shooting videos That's cool So for us to now Like obviously like Take it one step from there From their textbook Can be like Yo let's do it With those different content creators You know That are friends as well And see that Breathe new content as well And the space is really cool It's really really cool Yeah I also saw Like I know this is also Like I've never seen ghost get a brand deal Yeah I saw a ghost cut a brand It's just so close to working with I think on now Some sort of stuff Which is really cool Because like Ghost, Zile and Um Sasha's there Sasha Yeah which is really cool Shout out to them Yo Yeah bro It was also Crisp You see each of the videos I see the videos I love it But like for me What's what I like Is that like As much as Ghost's content Is controversial It's not brand safe It's there's a way that a brand Can approach him And explain to him When he can and can't do Moving forward And what they like do's and don'ts Oh and utilize someone As influential as Ghost Because Ghost is huge, bro Yeah, bro And it's like I've never understood Why I swear to him brands Don't just like Work with him Maybe it's expensive I don't know I guess so But I definitely think Brands are losing on A lot of the percentage of influence In South Africa Because they neglect The risky content creators But it's good Because there is brand safety, bro Because now you're going to use For example We can use SEMA as an example Because I don't see SEMA getting any deals I'm not following her properly But for example SEMA, bro Like SEMA has An insane following She's both a community She's both a community Storyview is crazy I don't know if she still wasn't Took a bunch of talks crazy Podcasts insane But the flop with her is that She's always on and off With controversies And even now it's like Her character on the podcast Is this person She's basically the make-g version of Yeah Make-G's podcast So she has to be the person That pushes somebody's buttons Talks badly about other people And there's like Brands don't feel safe Because it's like When I view you But When I view you and I'm watching you You speak ill and Unbadly about people How can I trust you to not speak ill about me Or to compromise the brand Yeah But one thing I know about SEMA and ghosts Like I'll put them together in one group Those people are Extremely intelligent with their content And she's even taking a step forward Forever to say okay cool I know I want to make content like this I want to make content the way I want to make content Let me sell my own product And she just released like her Lip gloss line Yeah she just released her lip gloss line Oh it's amazing And that's what an influencer Sees Now you're talking Sees their space and says Okay cool you know what I'll just productize That's dope I don't need to get a contract For me to product someone else Let me just productize But Guys yeah Sorry we're adding this little segment Because we feel as if I don't know I feel about it To be honest The segment Yeah She did She knows that's so cool But we're just adding this segment Because guys obviously means I thought I think that has been making content for how many years now like what? Seven Seven years I've been making for like two to three years now I think we At a point in our careers in content Where we can give advice And speak about certain things that we're like Oh We're noticing and picking up in trends and stuff Think with I think Not many will find this interesting But maybe some of you will be like Actually we actually enjoyed this challenge For me I struggled to I don't know the type of people we want to speak about right Because We are speaking about people that you usually engage with It's also content occurs in a different spectrum Which we could speak Which we could be speaking about So now we have these conversations about like family and stuff And now we're not speaking about goals It's like what? It's the relevancy you know But I think maybe people can learn from those conversations that we're having Because I know like Yo I've got so much to say about the industry, bro Like even like But maybe we should Okay well that was basically a teaser taste You got to listen to if you guys want us to continue that Or we can just continue on our narrative Dude I'm so proud of Sima Yeah She's co-founded by Sima So who's the other founder? I don't know actually But it actually does not even matter Her name is on the bottle Oh wait I just hope the coin represents that In the contracts Which they definitely will win Sima So yeah But we're very very interested Definitely wish I could try the lip gloss Yeah maybe we might buy some Buy some other lip gloss Yeah we'll buy people some lip gloss Nah this is huge bro It is It got me thinking about how We all have the capacity You know she's now in I think it's definitely ghost, bro You think you Yeah this is probably ghost this thing I love how men don't believe a woman can just No I did believe that it's still co-founded by Who's the other founder? How? It doesn't matter Medicis that she's also pushing Prices are nice Yeah but yeah Shout out to actually I'm not going to even say the name of this thing Even if I'm not her thing that's on her Instagram Because I Sima Like Yeah It's talking about me badly Hey guys Come on we will all concentrate back But anyways guys Back to the family narrative I definitely want to speak about Touto What type of people do you think Middle children are Like just a generalization Like a generalization Law is born First born and only children First born Okay First borns leaders They are the leader of the pikes They are the parent Middle child They are the ones that Basically came after the first born So really like Of course it's the first born I have a Better Christian of my parents I'm older than you I've done more with them than you So obviously I am a bit closer So they feel neglected Which gives most of them insecurities About their position in the family So I feel like they have then become When they are the middle born They become insecure Then the last born is like Hey what's going on everybody Yo y'all been doing the show for a while Hey shit Everyone come down Everyone come down Hey that means It used to be a When I was called Language You know what I'm saying You know what I'm saying It's like y'all had this guy used to be mean But now he's cool I cool vibes vibes vibes Then you receive 10% of our girls The lost children Receive 10% of what they received You want the first borns received That 10% doesn't mean it's Not nice Who do you think is the most sensitive out of the three So because that 10% Out of the four, sorry Because that 10% is not nice They just they're like Yo dude Like And they're under like Ah but I used to be worse Chill So they also feel like They feelings unheard or valid Because they're not receiving the worst Mant of poison First born and the second born fought So I think Basically what happens is that First born has to be confident Has to like be a leader Second born is a little bit like insecure He has a noise position in the family And in life Then the lost born is just They're like Hi Like hello Yeah Everyone's like Dude we see Dude you're having a good life It's like yeah But like Hello You hear what I'm saying Yeah Yeah I think similar I think Definitely the same I think middle child Always like the forgotten child So what was what was forgotten about So Let's talk about this Because there was a middle child Yeah so Like I forgot to Let me tell you one thing In one thing Let me just If you are not your Let me This is a This is a damn fact If you are not The first born child of your house First of all When your parents have a first child They're like Super excited It's the first time they're gonna have a child But you mean to tell me Your parents will have the first child They'd have another one and say Awa One more Do you know how bad that feels It's like wow From the moment you're born They're like Nah we're not done here We need to go one more extra Because this one is not enough To finish our family What are you saying? That's the moment you disappoint your parents The moment you're born They're like Now we need to try one more time You're yelling Do you get what I'm saying That's the first That's the first scene The scene of the middle child That everyone That every middle child gets What was if they planned to have three kids Before they even had you That's insane So I wasn't enough That's what I'm hearing Okay so I could say the same thing I wasn't enough No no no no That doesn't work Because they were excited about you The first one To get what I'm saying So no matter what And also if you're the last child That's like Oh my god Like we stopped here This is a great good place to stop So obviously But no but they wouldn't have stopped My mom popped my head to stop My mom wanted more kids You know that Yes but they stopped That she was because it was enough No mama doesn't have Mama removed her thing That was only after she I promise you Papa always says When I promise you I promise you I promise you I'm telling you They looked at you And they said it's enough They looked at me and said Now one more But yeah, that's the first thing In the middle child And then I'd also like to say The only child Also very very much Misunderstood child Call your parents Or giving you super My aunt and my intention They understand you etc But do they really know you Did you really know You don't really get to be You're like Real authentic like Persons are like Obviously when you have siblings You get to like You know Experiment to be like Yo I'm on this type of person But parents are very strict Et cetera So yeah that's my opinion Yeah Now I hear you guys And I really enjoy this conversation But I do want to say We're going to have to Unfortunately cut it right here Yeah Thank you so much for watching This episode of C-12 and C-12 And Biddy guys We really appreciate Your guys' efforts to pull through Every single Wednesday This week for you guys Basically a treat from us Because we're dropping three episodes This week So it's basically us saying We know we were gone We're trying to say sorry But we will be coming back To posting weekly As of next week Love you guys' loads Members We appreciate each and every single one of you guys Insiders We appreciate you too much You really helping us in this bag And to the podcast And we will see you guys Next week For a brand new episode of C-12 With Level And Tatar and Biddy [Music]