Next chapter podcast Shopify grows your business no matter how far or big you grow. Shopify is the global commerce platform that helps you sell at every stage of your business. Whether you're selling your fan's next favorite shirt or an exclusive piece of podcast merch, Shopify helps you sell everywhere. Shopify powers 10% of all e-commerce in the U.S. Allbirds, Raffees, Brooklyn and millions of other entrepreneurs of every size across a hundred seventy-five countries. Plus Shopify's award-winning help is there to support your success every step of the way. Because businesses that grow grow with Shopify, sign up for a one dollar per month trial period at Shopify.com/income. All lowercase. Go to Shopify.com/income now to grow your business no matter what stage you're in. We get it. This interruption isn't what you actually want to be listening to right now. But at Credit Karma we've learned that a little disruption can be a good thing especially when it comes to the slow, outdated and totally complicated financial system. We started shaking things up by offering free access to your credit scores. Then we expanded into more areas of personal finance and now we've added new tools and personalized features to make it easier to optimize your money and grow it faster. Download into it Credit Karma today and get everything you need to outsmart the system. This show is brought to you by Distro Kid. Bring your music to the masses. The 500. The 500. J.A.M. been walking us down through that 2012 edition so it ain't nothing to you. Hundreds more to go and in need of a friend. The King of Peaceful Angelo talking the 500 until the end. Talking the 500 until the end. With my man J.A.M. On the 500. Talking the 500 until the end. That is Scarborough Fair by Simon and Garfunkel from the 1966 record Parsley Sage Rosemary in Time. It's also number 202 out of 500 on the 500 with Josh Adam Myers. What's up everybody. My name is Josh and I am leading you through Rolling Stone Magazine's list of the 500 greatest albums from 500 down to 1. We're almost there dude. We're almost done. I mean literally 202 records left that's like four years. Not even four. I mean shorter. Holy shit. Holy shit. I don't know math by the way. Come see me live everybody. This weekend I will be in Syracuse at the Funny Bone July 26th to the 27th. August 1st to the 3rd Tulsa Comedy Club in Oklahoma. August 9th to the 10th laugh it up. Poughkeepsie Comedy Store. August 11th to the 12th. August 16th and 17th. Jimmy Kimmel live in Las Vegas. I'm going to see the killers to August 28th and 23rd and the 24th. I'll be at Fort Worth, Texas with big laughs. Then Calgary Comedy Store again. New Jersey Skankfest Vegas. Come find me Josh Adam Myers dot com. Punch up dot live backslash Josh Adam Myers everybody. Come to my shows. Come be a part of it at Josh Adam Myers on all social media. Want to watch the podcast instead of listening episodes drop on our YouTube page every Thursday just go to youtube.com/the500podcast and subscribe to the Patreon everybody. There are a bunch of incredible people that work on this podcast and they deserve a little bit of bread more than we can pay them. So your help with supporting the show helps us $5 a month gets you everything. That's questions to the guests. Be a part of the show. We love you. We need you. Help us. Please dear God. All right. Simon and Garfunkel. Well you know how we feel about Simon. And I can say it but you guys can because I think Wendy might be like ah fuck it. Fuck Paul Simon. That's you know the deal. You know the deal. It's the 500 y'all. We don't fuck around. But I dug this record and I dig my guest the one and only Wendy Lehman. Stand up comedian won the American comedy award for female stand up of the year in '97. Tonight's show with Johnny Carson. Larry Sanders HBO. Dr. Katz. Jimmy Kimmel live. Letterman. Jimmy Fallon and Craig Ferguson. This is a comic legend. Her one hour special Wendy Lehman. Taller on TV is available on Amazon. She also hosts locally grown comedy every month at flappers. Next show is August 24th. She's got a new podcast coming up called What's Up with Wendy and Nancy. So check that out. This was a tree. Honest to God a comic legend. So super fun. Great review. And most importantly subscribe to the 500 listen free on all platforms or anywhere you get your podcast. Follow me at Josh Adam Myers on all social media. Follow the podcast at the 500 podcast and all social media. Email the podcast at 500 podcasts at gmail.com. Follow the Facebook group run by crazy Evan and for all things 500 go to the website the 500 podcast.com. Alright y'all. Parsley Sage Rosemary time. Sumerick and paprika coming in at 202 by Simon and Garth. When daily men nice Jewish girl from Rosalind New York. The the most gaudy wedding I had ever been to was in Rosalind. Leonard. What is it? You know that Leonard's. No, no, it was. I forget a dude. It was Christ man. It was 2000 and the graduate college yet because I was still drinking. So yeah. So I think it was like 2005, 2006. And it was my my cousin got married and it was just like I mean Paula notes were there. It was it was crazy. It was insane. But it wasn't I think God God, he's not the right word. I guess just like, you know, opulent. Yes, like, you know, like like the babies were eating like little crab legs. They never even eaten. I just remember there was somebody in my class who had Phoebe Snow play at his bar mitzvah because her real name is Phoebe Loeb and it was his cousin. Yeah. You so it's a growing up in Long Island. Like, you know, you're kind of, you know, it's always like what? 20 minutes from New York City, the epicenter of the world and where everything is going on. Were you able to like, you know, come in and see music as a, as a, you know, as a, as a teen or even in your early twenties where you're already out and doing comedy by that point? I actually didn't start comedy till after college and I was in Boston and that's where I started it. But I do remember one night in high school, driving into Manhattan, we went to this club called Danceteria and I swear I saw Madonna before she was Madonna. Really? Yeah. Really? Dora. She was there. Yeah. You know, it's funny is I went last night to go see Janet Jackson at a Prudential Center. Big shout out to my buddy Chris at Live Nation for getting me. I don't think I've had, I was, I might as well have been sitting on stage. I was, I was in the fourth row dead center seat six. Like she could spit on me. It's like, it was so, it was crazy how close I was to her and just she's 58 and you're like, she's killing it. Music, you know, she sounds great. She looks incredible. But she dresses and she's still very confident and sexy, you know, in her way. But she's not trying to be 22 years old. And then I saw Madonna live recently and I was like, all right, all right, mad. You got to, you got to chill out a little bit. All right. I mean, I'm not going to get sorry. Yeah. It's dude. I love Madonna. Just age. There's nothing wrong with it. There's nothing wrong with being in your 60s and being sexy. It's great. And that's what I'm saying is that Janet owns her age. And Madonna, who, you know, is, I'd say, you know, they're both kind of on that level of like superstars from our like, you know, our childhood and our teens and our 20s. It's like, it's like, man, you know, I agree. I agree. I remember Madonna and Cindy Loper coming up at the same time. And Cindy was his her age now. Like she has aged. I haven't seen that documentary yet, but I can't wait. Which one? The Cindy Loper one. Really? That was one of the first episodes we did on the podcast. That might have been, I think, the actual second episode I recorded, I recorded it out of order, but it was Cindy's debut record. No, her documentary just came out. Sure. I would love to watch that because it was such an interesting story. Speaking of which, it was an interesting story to talk about, to really dive in with my researcher, Morty, Simon and Garfunkel, because when we did bookends, which I'll get into all this in a second, we did bookends. I didn't really prepare as well for it. I listened to the record and then I sat down with, who was our guest? Oh my God. Brilliant. Oh my goodness. Why can't she was friends with Madonna Christ? Why can't Sandra Bernhardt? Sandra Bernhardt, yes, was our guest and she was phenomenal. But to really find out about the history of this band, which we'll get into all of that. And before we get into that, I just want to get it out of the way because one, I'm a huge fan. I remember your tonight show. I remember watching you like when I was on television, when I was younger. So this is a huge opportunity just to have fun and get into this record. And I'm super excited that you're the guest for it. But before we do that, I know you have a lot going on. Please promote away anything you want to promote. What's going on in Wendy world? Oh, I, I just do stand up comedy. Done we are. I have a show on August 24th at a club called Flappers in Burbank. Love a good love flappers. It's my show. I won the, I won the, the uncle, uncle chunky comedy competition. I think that's what it's called. That was like one of my first claim to fame at the flappers. Uncle chunky. Yeah. The funniest club I ever worked at, the funniest name was, it was in Connecticut in the early, in the mid 80s, it was called Sputches. Yeah. And then there's a club called Rooster Teethothers. Anyway, I'm a huge fan of yours. I don't know how I found you. I think I found you on Instagram. Sure. But I just think you're uber talented. Oh, thank you. I've never felt cooler than I do right now to be. I feel like a rock star. You are. Josh, I might even trash my hotel room and get a tattoo. Well, there should be a delivery of cocaine coming because we give it to every guest. We really want you to get jacked up for the podcast. No, that's, that's great. And listen, it's what's so cool about music is, is that it doesn't, it's, it doesn't, it transcends like age and status and everything. It's literally, you know, regardless of, like, there's, I'll listen to, you know, you would look at me and you'd be like, oh, this guy's like rock and roll, because I love, I love Simon Garfunkel. I love jazz. I love everything. And I love this podcast because it really gives me a chance to like sit down with people that I respect and talk about these records. And it's really this really cool, like, meeting point where it's, like you said, it's like, dude, it's, I feel cool just having you on. So thank you. Wow. Go see Wendy. Please. Oh my God. So wait, before I get into this record, because we got so much to go over, like, have you seen Simon and Garfunkel live? Have you seen just Simon or Garfunkel? We saw my husband and I saw Simon and Garfunkel probably early 2000s. I think it was them because I left my cell phone at the Staples Center. And I remember it was a flip phone. So it was like really early on. And somebody turned it in probably could see the flip phone. But we were, it was their reunion tour. And I just remember right before they sang sound of silence echoes in the, and then somebody right in front of us yells out, whoo, sound of silence so that everybody at the fucking Staples, heard them say that. It was just the most, it was bad timing. Sure. I bet at a Simon and Garfunkel concert, anything that anybody says is going to be heard, because it's such a, you know, it's like, there's the, oh my God, what is his fucking name? Why can't I think of who's that comic? He's got the kind of bald and he talks kind of Steve talks like this. What is his name? I Steve. Jesus Christmas. My brain is so, you don't give me more clues. He's like absurd. He's like, you know, he was like, he was like, he was the guy on the couch in Stephen Wright. Stephen Wright. Yeah. It's like, you could hear a pin drop at a Stephen Wright concert. It was, you know, thank you. Everybody's paying attention every word. Just like he's the Simon and Garfunkel. Like, energy wise. This is so funny that you said that because I watched Stephen Wright on my little black and white TV in my college dorm room on the Tonight Show. And I thought this is the funniest thing I have ever seen in my life. And then I turned it off. And then like two days later, I flew home to New York and I'm sitting in my seat and Stephen Wright walks by. And I was like, I know him. I know him. And then I was like, who is that? I couldn't like place it because I had just seen him. And I go, oh, that's our Garfunkel. Oh, wow. I know. And then I remembered who it was. And I figured it out. And then I was going to say something to Stephen Wright as he got off the plane. And he never got off the plane. It was like such a Stephen Wright moment. But anyway, I've since met him and he's so cool. And he wrote a great book. Oh, it's so great. Well, it's I mean, it's I could see how that influenced you and your style because it's not it's not it's not completely the same at all. But it's like there is a similarity in it with like the misdirection, the lowering of the voice that you kind of it's really it's that's actually that's that was the moment the black and white TV in the door. Right. It was I really absurd. And as I've done this longer, I've done this like 40 years. Yeah, crazy. I get slower and softer. Like I watch early tapes of mine. I'm like, oh, slow down, bitch. But now, yeah, I think I just exhausted myself. And now I'm really slow on stage. I'm taking my time. Dude, it's please just just just like literally just let it out as slow as you want. Burbank's the perfect place for that, dude. My buddy my buddy, Angelo Bowers, who's one of the reasons we do this podcast, he he had a joke. He's like, I just ran the Burbank marathon. There's no actual winner of the Burbank marathon. You just run until you're tired of Burbank. Burbank looks like a city that stopped in the 70s. Yeah, they don't get a game up. It's it's literally I think that's where they shot some of like Peewee's big adventure. And it still hasn't changed from 1986 or I think whenever that came out, it still has that same vibe. There are updated restaurants, but besides what all right, you know what's funny? Right now, there's somebody a fan of this podcast that's like get into the album. All right. So we've done how do you know that? Because I know, I know my fans. I know the people who listen to this getting messages. No, God, no, because why it's also Morty, the guy that helps me write the show that really like you don't understand. I've been on the phone with my my my writer Morty since I'm in New York. It's 1 11 p.m. I just got off when you signed on. I think he I think 9 30 10 a.m. So I've been on for three hours talking about the history of Simon and Garfunkel. And he writes all this stuff with, you know, and for me, and he goes over it so because I don't want to come off sounding stupid or missing something important because I know if you know this Monday, music is so important to so many people. So, you know, because this record could be like they played it at my dad's funeral. This is the song I fell in love to. You know, and if you critique it in a way or you, you know, don't give it the kudos it deserves, you know, I might not like it, but somebody thinks this is the greatest album ever made. So I try to give everything the respect it deserves. But I do have fans that, you know, they will shit on me and they'll you don't know anything. Get into the record. What are you talking about? And it's like, okay, dude. Well, that's why you have Wayne Federman on because he knows everything about everything. Wait, Wayne's actually wrote to him before this because I come to it. Yeah, because I I know he's done a lot of these. He's an 11 of them. It's when we need when we need that's he's the best when we need somebody. It's like this record is so it's like it's like blind Willy Jenkins from 1922. And it's like, get Federman, get Fetty Wob because he'll know and he comes in prepared. It was actually really sweet. The last time he came on, he did cream. And he was so excited. It was like when I texted him, do you want to do cream? He was so excited because it was an album that he actually really loved. And and it was great. So he'll probably come on since we have another 200 episodes of this to go. He'll probably come on many, many more times. But you are. Yeah, I mean, you're your producer reached out to me a couple of times about albums I had no idea about. So this album, I didn't know about this album either. I'm a huge Simon and Garfunkel fan, but really, but I didn't know this album. Yeah, I think I grew up with their greatest hits album, which which 72, which is funny because as we were talking about me and my my writer, it was like everybody had that that was like that was like the Eagles greatest hits. That's like Bob Marley legend. It's this it was in everybody's household. Well, here, let me let me tell you a little bit about this to catch you up. So we know. Oh, I'm doing a deep dive like I've got to do my homework. I'm glad I've got to do it for that guy that's sitting there. Like, I don't know who I don't know who side. So our record today, let me pull it up. Our record today is Parsley Sage Parsley Sage Rosemary and Time by Simon and Garfunkel released October 24th, 1966. It's quick, man. 27 minutes and 55 seconds, dude produced by Bob Johnston. And this came out right after their album, Silent of Silence and the graduate now to give you a little skedoodle. So we've done bookends, which is a record right after this. So just to recap, Queens, New York neighborhood and elementary school friends, Paul Simon and our Garfunkel, by the way, Wendy, jump in at any moment. If there's anything you want to say, okay, Paul Simon and our comfort Garfunkel started their careers together in the early 50s. Like many other contemporaries, they were inspired by the birth of rock and roll, and especially the Everly brothers and learned to harmonize similarly with their street corner duop group, the Peptones. A few years later, as a duo, they released a few singles as Tom and Jerry, to some local success, but broke up in 1958 so they could pursue solo careers as well as go to college. After neither of them had much solo success, either they got back together in 1963 during the growing folk scene and quickly got signed to Columbia Records under their own names. Their first record, Wednesday mornings, 3 a.m., a pretty standard folk record of the time, with five songs written by Simon and some traditional songs sold very poorly, discouraged. Paul left to go to England for a solo career and to hone his craft. He found some songwriting success and released some singles and had art visit him for some gigs, but eventually art moved back to New York to go to college, followed by Paul. However, this is where it gets interesting. In 1965, or by 1965, a more confident Paul returned to England to get and got a record deal. His first solo album, the Paul Simon songbook, didn't sell well, but it featured some of the strongest songs he had written for the duo's first album and since. Meanwhile, back in the states, this is where it gets cool. A radio station started playing a song from their debut, The Sound of Silence, and it picked up popularity. Producer Tom Wilson, who signed them and produced their debut, took that original acoustic duo recording and added a band behind them in hopes of capitalizing on the song's current success and the rise of folk rock, like Wilson had done with Bob Dylan. The song went to number one. Simon came home and reunited with Simon and Garfunkel. They began touring and quickly recorded their follow up sounds of silence in '66 and it was a rush to keep the momentum going. It included several songs from Paul's solo album. It was also a success and set up this record. Despite near complete control, a huge and growing budget, including getting Columbia to buy an A-track recording machine so they could overdub more intricate vocal harmonies and more time, Paul still felt all the pressure making it difficult to write enough material. So the album contains reworkings of songs from his solo record, some of the singles previously released or recorded for the last album, some rewritten material, and some traditional songs. Despite all of that, it was another success and it was regarded as their first masterpiece. That catches you up. Is that everything you knew? Yes, and I found out that Paul has a twin brother. He's not his twin, but they look like twins, which is younger brother. Yes, and they play together once live, and that's on YouTube. Yes. Morty, what the fuck, dude? You should have had this for me. I don't know what to do. It's heavy or ed, and it's creepy because they look so similar. Really? Yeah. I love that. That's not part of the album. No, no, no, but I dig that. Here's the thing about, which we'll get into about Paul Simon, there's some stuff. We have a thing on this podcast. We have a hashtag. We're pulling them up. There he is. Look at that. It looks just like him. I know, it's creepy. Yeah, he is kind of like an omen version of him. Right. I watched the documentary about Paul Simon. You love him? You're fan of him now, or he just makes you feel good, better, worse? I was wowed by his talent. I think he's really talented. And I want to live in the house in Texas, but now I loved watching the documentary about him. Yeah. But I love Art Garfunkel so much, although he's a plus one. He's the best one. What do you mean? He's not the guest. He's not the main guest. He's the guy that's coming. He's going to eat all the hors d'oeuvres. Voice something. I love his voice so much. And I also love his story, like he wandered around. He walked through Europe. Oh, yeah. We're going to get into all this. This is great. All right. Let's see. Let's shut up. No, no, no, no. Don't shut up. No, don't shut up. Do you want me to ask you a question in a second? So here, Parsley, St. Rosemary, and Thyme, Canticole. If I said that right, Cantic. Yeah. The album begins and ends with songs that weave together poignant and planative tunes with dark subjects. Paul had learned the traditional title tracks while in England and added a rewritten anti-war lyric he had from previous song, The Side of a Hill, as a counterpoint. The main song's melody had been passed down for many years and had even been borrowed along with some lines by Bob Dylan for a girl from the North Country a couple years earlier. Even though the song was traditional, credit was taken by Simon and Garfunkel. So Parsley, St. Rosemary and Thyme, let's add some oregano and garlic to the title and talk about your recent sing-along at Vitello's restaurant with our friend Morty, my writer, his friend and Neil Diamond's bassist, Bill Sinke. Your husband, of course, comes from a serious pedigree musical family. I had gratefully figured out how to merge my two passions the same way by combining comedy and music. How long have you been mixing comedy and music? Josh, that was the first time. No way. It was the first time I been performing at Vitello's producing my show Locally Grown Comedy there. I did it for like eight years and then they reconfigured the room and it wasn't conducive to stand up because the comedians were on level with the audience. Yeah, it's weird. I've performed that way before, but it wasn't right and the lighting sucked for comedy. So I said to the owner, can I do something else here? Something that I've been thinking about for years and that is a sing-along and the audience sing-along. It was just one of these dreams I had. It wasn't karaoke. It was that I had these two musicians, Bill Sinke and Jeff Allen Ross, who played with Badfinger in their second incarnation and they both both Bill and Jeff Allen play with Peter Asher. And I invited them. Peter, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, hold on, Peter Asher from Apple Records. He's been on the podcast. He hated me. He hated me. I thought, I was like, "Oh, dude, the audience, I got shit on big time." Why did he hate you? He didn't hate me. I didn't mean to interrupt, but I was like, I don't know. I speak in this weird language sometimes that me and my buddy Angela used to talk where I just make up words, but you can kind of understand the meaning. And I would ask him questions and I would throw those words in and he would just look at me like I was slow. And then finally, he started loosening up. By the end of it, we were having fun, but it was just, yeah, man, it was not my finest hour. I wouldn't say tense as much as I would say. He just did that. Make up a word. Make up a word. It was good. It was gashluki. It was a gashluk. 100%. But that's what happens, man. But pick up to him. I'll be doing Peter. I love you, buddy. I hope you do. I've never met him, but both Bill and Jeff play with him. And he produces James Taylor, Kate Taylor. Anyway, I invited their friends. They've been friends for a while and I invited them to play and I handed out lyrics to everybody in the audience. I had kazoos and egg shakers and castanets and reading glasses. If you forgot, you're like, I was prepared and everybody sang everything. Even people that said they weren't going to sing. They were just going to sit there. And it was epic. It was like my dream come true. And I'm scared to do it again, because it'll never be as good. I know you do. God, yeah. Yeah, which actually the 10 year anniversary is coming up July 21st. So we're that's incredible. It really is. My life's been completely different. That's the exact day we did the first one in 2014. So my life's been different ever since then. And how do you come up with that? Just I, you know, I've told this story a million times on the podcast, but I'll tell you quickly. It's just, you know, I was I've sang my whole life. I played music my whole life and I've tried to be funny my whole life. And so I had a buddy, Angelo, who just said, you know, dude, you you seem so happy doing stand up and you're great at it, but he goes, but there's definitely your you singing and playing music is really where your heart is. You know that. And I was like, yeah, he's like, try to figure out a way to combine them. I'm not saying be a musical comic, but just try to figure out. And so I got to a place after some success that it was just like flat. And I said, I'm going to try this show where comedians sing. And and it's just everything. Bill Burr became involved in the band. I'd known for years we became involved. We found the right venue. And just every little piece just kind of connected. And and since then, you know, I've, I literally get to do, I created the job that I've always wanted. And that's how it was with my sing along, just every piece fell into place. And that's why you don't want to do it again and ruin it. Kind of. Yeah, I get it. But how often do you do that? We do once a month. And then I tour with it. And then I now my stand upset when I'm here at the comedy seller, they have a band. And so I just do that all the time. I sing even if I don't have a band I sing. I'm just constantly like, like my favorite thing to do is like to guess the music people fuck to. And like, I'll be like, you look like, you look like you fucked up. Mama's in the poppers. And then I sing a little bit of it. And it does all I'm doing is just jukeboxing it. But people love it. And it's, it's just, you know, like, you know, you fucked up, never gonna give you up. Like, I just do that. And it's it. That's a wrap. I give that's gonna make a whole special album called jokes to make love by. That's great. That's great. Do it. But you know, that guy is waiting for us to talk about. Let's dig in. What's his name? What's his name? It's just make one up. Billy. No, it's not Billy. It's got to be like, like, like, like, Harry. You're like a Henry. Like, yeah, like, just chucks are a good one. Yeah, Chuck's angry. Chuck's angry at me. And then he's also angry. You know, he's, he's the guy that's got like eight, he follows a thousand, but he's got three followers. And it's like him. He's commenting, getting mad. He's commenting at like, the president. Like, like, he's gonna see it. You know, but I do see it. Like, Biden and Trump don't see it. I see it. I am the one that looks at my comics. I'm an idiot. Chuck, it's okay, buddy. Don't worry. Guess what? We're gonna talk about patterns now. But big shout out to, to Bill Sinke. Do you know how long have you known Bill? Like 10 years. I just love him. He is the most incredible voice. He's so talented. And they both have great sense of humor. And they are in a band called the Hall of Fame band. Yeah. With Rob Bonfiglio, who please. I know he's married. He's married to Carrie Carney Wilson. Oh, okay. And he is Wilson Phillips musical director. And he also plays with, I don't know if it's the Beach Boys or Brian Wilson. I think it's Brian Wilson. But he's in the band and then a drummer whose name I'm blanking at about. What's this? Probably is it another Italian name? It's like Brian Baba fun goal. No, it's Alice. Something Alice, A-L-L-I-S. But anyway, they play in the Hall of Fame band. They're amazing because they each come from like Neil Diamond and Badfinger. So they play songs of bands that they've been in. And they sound just fucking incredible. Definitely. I'd love to see that. That sounds great. And also he played with Neil Diamond. So that to me, that's the artist that got away, the one that I always wish I could have seen live. He's still alive though, right? He's not touring though. He has Parkinson's. I know. I know. Well, our fun goal lost his voice for a while. And then I just saw in that documentary about Paul Simon, he is losing his hearing. Really? Yeah. And I know musicians who've lost their hearing because they're drummers or like that's a collateral damage of being a rock star. Sure. Yeah, I definitely are. Sure. I have right here, I have these incredible earplugs I wear when I go to concerts. And you know, when I play music, I wear my in ears. So yeah, I'm surprised I still have my hearing. But you know, Chuck, hold on. You're young. Don't worry, Chuck. Chuck, chill out, Chuck. I'm sorry we're talking about this. All right, buddy. Chuck. Chuck. All right, patterns. Let's talk about patterns. All right. This captures the angry young man's desperation while comparing life to the sort of rat mazes that scientists use to study their behaviors. With so many, with so much monotony and burnout possible after years in comedy, how do you keep things fresh? I don't perform that much. That's my answer. I don't perform that much. But also how do I keep things fresh? Okay, so when I first started, I wrote down every word and I didn't veer from that. And then I saw Jake Johansson perform like three nights in a row at Catarizing Star in Cambridge, Massachusetts, my home club. And he mixed things up. Like he wasn't verbatim and I thought, Oh my God, I can do that. And now I go up. I have no idea what I'm going to say. I mean, I sort of know what I'm going to start with, but I find surprising myself makes it fresh for me. I mean, they're jokes. They're jokes I wrote, but it's like they're all back here. And I love talking to the audience. Yeah, I find it. It keeps it fresh for me if I don't know exactly what I'm going to say. No, you have to. I know I completely, I don't go into with a plaque. I know I have so much material. And it's like, I know what I can do, but I like to see if I can figure it out there. Now if I'm going to get table special, which I'm going to do at the end of the year, I'm going to make sure I lay it out and I'm doing it in an order, but just a regular set. Oh man, I'm having more fun than the audience is having. So that's how I keep it fresh. Seriously. Where are you, where are you doing your special? I don't know yet. It's all we're all working on it. I have my director Eric Abrams. And we've talked about maybe doing it. We want to, I want to have the band and I want to do it like open with music, do some stand up, go back to music, do some stand up, go back to music and end with music, but not even like pre-written songs, just kind of the things that I do. So we don't know, maybe the vibe. That's not your first special, is it? It will be. I've had a bunch of sets. I've done, I've done short sets on Netflix. I've done short sets on Comedy Central. I haven't done late night. Well, I did, no, I didn't do late night. Well, I now defunct. Newvo TV. I did do stand up on that, but it was a network or something. It was like a Spanish Latino. You remember it? You remember, what was the NBC one fucking? Oh my God. What was that called? Why am I having a brainstorm? No, not. No, no, no, it was. See, see, see, see, see, so yeah. God, I'm so like, oh, quibi. Well, quibi, that was that was that was the first, you know, that was the first thing that fell from the pandemic. That was the first victim of of COVID that literally came out three days after COVID, right? And then it was like, it was created to watch like in a bank line. And then it's, and then it just everybody just watched TV. Oh man, that's during the pandemic. I, I got something calls Amazon, Nisha. And that's when you get a box and you're like, what did I order? I'm just doing material for you. No, I love that. I love that. Dude, I'm, I said, I was talking to, I was talking to a comedian. We were talking about what we're going to do if we ever make like, you know, Bill Gates type money. And I go, man, I'm going to have so many Amazon packages delivered daily. Like, just doing, I feel so dumb, but I order stuff like nail polish. And it comes like in a little like, I'm like, what the fuck is with me? I just don't know. It's much easier. I live in New York. So ordering stuff here is like, it's, it's the only way to get it. So you're not, you're fine. You're fine. My parents live in New York. They moved from Long Island and they retired in New York City because they love going to theater. And so anyway, anyway, that was. All right. All right. All right. Let's talk cloudy. Let's talk cloudy. Are we are we done with patterns? Because you know, do you want to say anything? Please add anything. I have a list of the song like I put them in not order, but I wrote, don't tell me your favorite yet. Don't tell me your favorite. If you have thoughts, please, yeah, please jump in. I have meth for patterns and big bright green pleasure machine. Wait, wait, hold on. Don't jump to that one yet. We got to get to that later. All right. So we're on cloudy, but pat away patterns. You wrote math and the age. I did. I did. What made you say ma about it? I just, it felt, um, felt ma like he was trying too hard. Wow. I don't know. No. Hey, please, please. No, I'm sure he doesn't love all of my jokes. Hey, everybody. So you guys have probably heard me talk about how I've been in bands my whole life. I love writing songs and performing in front of crowds. Just like with comedy as a musician, it can be kind of hard to cut through the noise and really stand out as an artist. I feel like half the music projects I've been in have ended just because we couldn't figure out the answer to that eternal question of how do we get people to hear us? But then again, that was before there was Distro Kid. Distro Kid is a digital music distribution service that brings your sound to the masses. It's a one stop shop for getting your songs on iTunes, Spotify, Apple music, YouTube music, Amazon, Deezer, title, and many more. What's these? I never even heard of Deezer. How many of them are there? I know that that's like the holy grail of streaming services, though, and getting paid. They want to get you paid for your music. That's huge because a lot of bands go broke before they get big. But Distro Kid collects earnings and payments and sends 100% of these earnings to artists minus banking fees and applicable taxes. And that's just one of the tons of benefits of using Distro Kid. You can send big files to anyone with their instant share feature. You can use the hyper follow feature to promote your release and get presaves on your song. You can even create personal landing pages for yourself, your band, your brand, and whatever you like. It has a free Spotify Canvas Generator, too, to generate your own Spotify Canvas for your songs. And the Mixia feature instantly masters your tracks for higher quality audio. So if you're ready to bring your band to the next level, it's time to check out Distro Kid. The Distro Kid app is now available on iOS and Android. Go to the app or play store to download it. Listeners of this show can get 30% off their first year by going to distrokid.com/vip/the500. That's distrokid.com/vip/the500 for 30% off your first year. Dig it. >> Walmart has the trusted brands and products your kids need for school. >> Like HP Chromebooks? >> Yep. >> Reebok hoodies? >> Yep. >> Pokemon pencil cases? >> I think you know the answer. But just in case, yes. Go back in a style with Walmart. >> All right. Well, let's see. Let's talk cloudy. Maybe there's -- don't tell me your reaction yet. But cloudy is a -- no pun intended -- a breezy number from the perspective of a hitchhiker in Northern California. All right. What did you review on cloudy? What did you write? >> I said it was okay. I mean, it's interesting that it was about a hitchhiker because a lot of their music or Paul Simon's music is about traveling buses and trains and walking and later -- yeah. And later, like, his last album was about flying. So it's all about, like, movement and going somewhere. That was just an observation I made. >> No. And I think that I was talking to Morty about it. I think, like, he just, like, walks around and goes, all right, this is a candle. And that's a light post. And that's a this. And he just puts it all into a song. It's just like a little jumbel. >> It's a little, like, sondheim. >> Yes. Yes. Yes. Cloudy. So this -- they say that travel, though, broadens the mind have you ever taken off on a trip to explore or find yourself? >> Yes. I have. I went to Hawaii. I do something called the Alexander technique. >> Oh, my God. Yeah. With your body. And you have to -- yeah. Colin Quinn recommended that to me because of my voice. >> Really? >> Yeah. And I went to a guy who actually just passed away. >> Oh, because it's all about elongating your spine. And they teach it at Juilliard because it's about using your body as a part of the -- it's an instrument, basically, your body is. And Alexander found that his voice was suffering. So he, like, studied himself in mirrors. And he saw that he was, like, compressing his neck. And that's why his voice was disturbed. So anyway, I went on a retreat on an -- I'd never done anything like this before. It's probably 28 years ago. But we went to Hawaii with, like, five people. And it was just -- yeah. It was very reflective. >> Good. >> And it was Hawaii. Have you ever gone on a trip? >> I'm back back through Europe. I dropped out of college, and I back back Europe for about six and a half, seven months. When I was 18, about to turn 19, because I inherited some money. And I was, like, lost. And a record, it's funny, because I talked about this, but, okay, computer by radio head. It was just -- I had just gotten into radio head, like, really became one of my favorite bands. And it was, like, there's that moment where you're, like, the record is written about me. And it just -- I was, like, you know, I'm not saying it said, like, tune in, drop out type shit. But it was just -- it just felt like college didn't feel right at the moment. And so I went to go find myself. >> I couldn't afford Europe after college. So I went backpacking through Epcot Center. [ Laughter ] >> That's good. That was a good one. >> Just doing my material for you. Stop me. >> Come on, dude. You just want to make Josh laugh. >> You got me. Don't even worry. Don't even worry. That's so crazy, the Alexander technique. I love that you brought that up. I need to remember to keep my life. >> Oh, it changed my life. It changed my life. Because my -- oops, I lost. My mother said when I first started doing stand-up that I, like, slouched on stage, like Woody Allen, like, I was one stover. >> Really? >> And she heard about this thing called the Alexander technique. So it changed my life. I would be, like, a shriveled up. >> I need to start doing it more. Because I actually just had vocal cord surgery. But I need to do it. Like, I had to pile up and I had scar tissue that I needed to remove. And now my voice is, like, I mean, it's still always going to be, like, gravelly and deep. But it's basically back to where it was pre all the issues. So, you know, and with that and the Alexander technique, like, I'm in a good position. >> Well, they said that Arcar Funko scarred his vocal cords. And he choked on some lobster. Like, I read that. >> No, I feel like I've heard that too, yeah. >> And then I read that he said, yes, that happened. But it wasn't the only thing that contributed to the demise of his vocal cords. But I think he said they're back now. >> Oh, no. >> Of all the things, lobster. >> I know. >> As a Jew, shellfish, my God. It's like. >> Well, no wonder it's trafe. >> Yeah. >> I actually don't like lobster. Like, I don't like it. I know. Like, what's wrong with me? >> It's insane. I was just in Connecticut. I was just in Connecticut with my dog. >> I'm bragging. Okay. You were in Connecticut with your dog. >> Well, yeah, I bring my dog here, hold on. Lekka. Lekka, sit. >> Is that a dashing? >> No, it's a Doberman Pinger. But I- >> Did you just French kiss your dog? >> Yeah, dude. We got a problem with that. >> My dogs love Simon and Garfunkel. >> Do they really? Lekka's more of a slipknot fan. You know, she likes metal. But we got lobster, she eats lobster. I'll show you this video. I'll send it to Adam right now. >> He must be doing great, Josh. >> I am not doing that. I'm not doing bad. I'll tell you that much. I'm not doing bad, but I also don't- Adam, I'm going to send you a video of my dog eating lobster. Fuck. Where is that? Who did I send it to? Oh, Justine. The money- I'm not saying money isn't an issue, but you know, it is. >> I was just saying money. You don't have to explain yourself. >> Okay, good. Thank you. Because I was like- >> I have two dogs. Yeah, I have gendos. Have you ever heard of the gendo? >> No, I'd haven't. >> They're rescued from Korea. >> Really? >> They were going to be in a meat market. This is not a joke. They were rescued from being eaten for real. >> Really? >> They are the delicacy and they're also like- Yeah, where's her dog? >> That's a gendo. That's not my dog, though, but that is a gendo. Mine are cuter. >> I have Jesus. >> My dog's better trained than your dogs. I'll tell you that much. >> My dogs are as trainable as a carrot. They are- >> But they're self-cleaning. >> Good. Yeah, and like his type of agent too. Yeah, sure. >> But one of them is, and I'm not joking, on the spectrum, and I asked the vet if there could be an autistic dog and he said yes, if they're taken away from their mother too soon. So we basically have a feral cat in the shape of a gendo living in our house. But I love them. They're my best friends. >> I love that. I love that. No, I love that. Dog's rule. Dog's rule. >> I never had one before I was in my 40s, so that changed my life. >> I bring her everywhere because she's seven, and I tour so much that I was like, I'm not going to go another moment of my life without bringing that dog with me everywhere. And she's a service animal, so I can bring her anywhere. >> That's awesome. >> I'm sorry. >> I know, as we say, Adam, I just sent you a video and you eventually pull it up. Pull it up right now, but we'll watch that right at the end. Cool. >> I travel with an emotional support box of Cheez-Its. >> That's a good one. Cheez-Its rule. All right, let's move on, hold on. As we noted on the most robust episode, Paul had had some disputes about songwriting credits. Paul, oh wait, you're playing it right now? Okay, just play it. Play it now, Adam, you already started it. There you go. There's my dog. >> Oh my god. >> Second dog, everybody gets to see. All right, where was I? As we noted on the Los Lobos episode, Paul had some disputes about songwriting credits. Paul met Bruce Woodley of the new Seekers, while in England and the two co-wrote several songs together, including Red Rubber Ball, which became a million seller for The Circle. Although co-written by them both, Woodley's name was left off Cloudy's credits on this record. Presumably, lawyers were called and it got worked out. Homeward Bound. >> That's in my top five. >> That's it? Yeah, it is. Yeah, this is great. >> I love that song. >> Paul moved to England in '64 when he was 22. And there he met 16-year-old Cathy Chitty. And they started a relationship while he played all over England. He missed being with her and started to write the lyrics in various train stations. In fact, in the witness station, there's a plaque to commemorate Paul's writing of the song there in 1965. Cathy traveled back to America with him to visit. He came back to England to be with her until the surprise success of the updated version of the Sound of Silence. As Cathy was shy and private, she didn't want to deal with Paul's new fame and broke up with them. Her name or their relationship was mentioned or alluded to in several other songs, including Cathy's Songs, America, and the Late Great Johnny Ace. Thoughts on Homeward Bound? >> I just want to say that there's a plaque up at a Burger King. That's where I wrote a joke about a piñata. >> Not the panata, which burger game I want to go to. >> Oh, which Burger King in Massachusetts? >> Nice. >> Chick-a-pee. >> Chick-a-pee, okay. So I read that about Cathy Chitty, and I thought that's interesting. I've never heard that as a name, but my father-in-law and his brother wrote the music for Chitty, Chitty, Bang, Bang. So that was my train of thought. >> Is that true? >> That is true. >> Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's awesome. That's so cool. >> Yeah, they wrote, that's not Disney, but they wrote a lot of the music for Disney. They wrote Mary Poppins and the Jungle Book and the music and the song It's A Small World, which is probably like the most played song on the planet. >> I feel like I have a question about that. I'm going to ask you later, I think, maybe I don't. But yeah, I remember he was telling me about that. Morty, oh, well, no, I have this coming up. All right, well, here, I guess the question I have for this is, who was your biggest inspiration? Who's been your biggest? Like, what do you, what inspires you? Who inspires you? >> You mean comedy-wise? >> Sure. >> Okay. Well, I grew up watching Lily Tomlin and doing her characters for my father, and I loved making my father laugh, and I still do. He's like my best audience. Oh, and I remember watching Phyllis Diller on Merv Griffin or Mike Douglas, and she said, "Just when you make them laugh and they think that they're done laughing, you have to hit them again." And I'm like 11, and I go, "I know what you mean, lady. So I always had that sense of tags, tag lines to jokes." But then I saw Stephen Wright, and I loved Rita Rudner and David Letterman. I used to work, I was going to be a therapist, and I worked in this office, and everybody said, "David Letterman would think you're funny." Then I started listening to the people around me in Boston, including Jonathan Katz, who did Dr. Katz's professional therapist, and Brian Kylie, who is just a genius joke writer. He wrote for Conan his whole talk show. And Laura Keitlinger, I listened to those voices. Bill Broadus, these are comedians in Boston. And yeah, I think you sort of assimilate the voices that you hear and try to make it your own. So I was influenced by those people. I hear a lot of those people. And Kevin Meany, I don't know if you know Kevin Meany. Aww, RIP, Kevin Meany. He passed away not too long ago, right? Let's talk about, so you, Homer bound in your top five, what about the big, bright green pleasure machine? Thoughts on that? Like, what? Yeah, I do like there's like a little guitar riff in there that I like. Yeah. But I can't conjure it right now. I just wrote that down while I was listening to it. But even my dogs were like, no. Oh, well, it's cynical and satirical take on the consumer and pop culture and the advertising firms on Madison Avenue who are responsible for much of it. It said, Paul conceived the song while watching his laundry agitate in a, or is it agitate? Yeah, agitate in a London washing machine. What are your thoughts on comics and performers these days and how much self-promotion and advertising we have to do on social media? Do you have any thoughts on that? Oh, I say you're going to ask me about comedians and their laundry. Um, it's like a second job and I'm like a, I'm older than people who are really into promoting themselves. Um, yeah, I see people now promoting, like posting clips of their stand up ad nauseum. Maybe, I guess it gets you an audience, a follow-up. Really? Well, it's unfortunate. It's unfortunate because we can. You don't need these gatekeepers anymore. So we can create it on our own through social media. Right. I do like that. And I also feel like I can write whatever I want on social media too. So I can post whatever I want. And I'm on all of them, except TikTok. I have like maybe a few videos up on TikTok. But it's like, it's like, I don't, the thing that I don't like about social media is like, I have to like the same joke of a friend of mine on each platform. I like it on on Twitter. I like or X. I liked it on Facebook. I liked it on Instagram. Now I liked it on threads. It's too much. Yeah. No, completely. Uh, you're not wrong. Everything you're saying is under percent right. Um, the 59th street bridge song, feeling groovy name for New York's Queensborough bridge that spans between Queens and Manhattan, Paul was inspired while walking on it, including references to the cobblestones and the lampposts, which are still there to strengthen the jazzy swing of the recording. They are backed by the Dave Brubeck quartet's rhythm section of Eugene Wright and Double Bass and Joe Morello on drums. Although the song is beloved and has been covered plenty of times, including Harper's Bazaar's hit version the next year, they felt this was too poppy and simple. Uh, which is another reason Paul didn't want to call it feeling groovy. And while it seems like an obvious choice for a single, it was actually too short for radio. Um, thoughts on this song. I like this song. It kind of reminds me of high school. Um, wondering if I should go to my high school reunion that I was just invited to. I'm not sure. Yes. I should. Yes. Why not? I don't know. One year they asked me to perform at my high school reunion. I'm like, oh, so I could feel, so I can feel alienated again. Um, I like that song. I, uh, yeah, I don't love it, but I like it. It's in my life. Like, yeah, I like it. It's not. It's not a man. It's not a man. All right. Well, being the songs, but feeling groovy, what makes you feel groovy? I actually looked up when groovy, when they first used that word because I was like, is that a word that he sort of put into the vernacular, but it was like in the 1800s, the word groovy. Really? Yeah. Have more to check. More to your chock. What do you guys? What makes me feel groovy? Yeah, I don't know. Uh, I don't even know. So you checked when it came out, but you didn't look at what it meant. No, I know what it means, but like I think of Austin Powers and there was a teacher in my elementary school who used to run these like groovy weekends for swinging singles. Yeah. And everybody went to the Hamptons. I mean, not the kids. He did this for the parents. And it was like they had key parties. And so I think of that as groovy. Um, yeah, bell bottoms make me feel groovy. Okay. So you're taking it back to the sixties. Yeah. What makes you feel cool by this? What makes you feel cool today? What makes when this being on Josh's podcast? I love that. Do you want to something cool though? In a rare turnabout, Paul ended up suing Sid and Marty Croft for plagiarizing this for the theme of the late sixties psychedelic culture children show HR Puffin stuff. Uh, his name is now included with theirs as songwriter. This is a reoccurring thing with Paul Simon. A lot of, he's very litigious. Very, very litigious. You know, he, it's funny that he's doing this soon. Weren't they sued for parsley, say, Drew Mary Rosemary in time? Because somebody gave them this song. Adam looked at a morning and get to go. Like it's an old, it's an old Gaelic song. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, I mean, Scarborough Fair thing, it has that like, you know, yeah, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, the king and the queen and the puppet and the stumpet and the lead. That's what it's like. It's very, it's HR Puffin stuff. It looks like, yeah, I know picturing women and in, of course, it's in, you know, the big dresses. Yeah, it'd be like, should we go to the ball? It feels groovy, doesn't it? This course makes me feel so groovy. A big turkey leg. Ah, the Renaissance Fair. Oh, yeah, yeah. I went to a Renaissance Fair in Northridge and then I went out and I was eating the turkey leg as we went to the car and there was like a homeless guy and I was like, hey, man, do you want this? He goes, I'm not. He's like, no, it looked ridiculous. All right. We once tried to give a homeless woman a tuna fish sandwich in New York City and she looks in, she goes, I didn't want tuna. So from then on, we were like beggars can be choosers. Yeah, you said, you said the funniest thing I've ever heard. I think the sentence that you just said, I went to a Renaissance Fair in Northridge. I don't know why that just made me crack. And it's a shit area. Yeah, you get deep out into California, man, you get out of Los Angeles and just gets weirder and weirder. Even Calabasas is a fucking joke. Like it's just, it's so, you know, hey, I live here there. Oh, what do you live in Hidden Hills? Are you West Hills? So I, when I worked, I worked for the Kardashians for, for a year. It was my first job in LA. So we, I was in Calabasas and Hidden Hills. You know what? You know, the people I hate the most in LA, the Topanga Canyon people. Oh, oh, the Topanga's. Oh, they're like, like, oh, I won't have dairy, but I'll do this. I'll take Xanax every day. You know what I mean? It's like, okay. Oh, my God. They don't have phones. Well, my husband wrote on a sitcom called Boy Meets World. Oh, I remember that. And they named Topanga, Topanga after Topanga Canyon. The little pearl. Sure. No, I got it. Where were we? You were saying about Turkey legs and... Oh, nah, that's besides the point. Let's get into, let's get into the dangling conversation. The second single was reportedly both of their favorites at the time, and they expected it to be a huge hit, but it wasn't. And with that disappointment, they've become dismisses of it, dismissive of it. It perfectly captures a tender moment of being young and in college and in love. It's all gentleness in all of its gentleness, preciousness, hypocrisy, and pretentiousness. What do you look back on in your earlier stuff with embarrassment? My haircut. Really? I had really short hair. Somebody goes, why did you? It was somebody who works at the comedy seller, Dave Jessica. He goes, why did you have such short hair? I go, I guess I didn't have any friends. I did, but yeah, I look back with embarrassment and some of my earlier jokes. But about that song, I thought I read that Art Garfunkel thought it was pretentious, but I might have the wrong song, but he didn't want to sing it. Yeah, that was. Where are you, buddy? He's talking to Chuck right now. Let's see. Flowers never been with the rainfall. What did you think of dangling conversation? We got to ask you that. Did you enjoy it or? It's in my okay, my okay, Kyle. Okay, good, good. All right. Flowers never been with the rainfall. An introspection that includes an actual reflection similar to patterns. This is just another nice pop tune. Any thoughts on it? No. There were two songs that sounded like homeward bound a little. Now I have to find it. Yeah, figure out which one that was. I think I know what you're talking about. Oh, it was cloudy. The beginning is similar to homeward bound. Yes. Homeward bound is just better. Oh, and flowers that never been also has a little riff that sounds like homeward bound too. Those are just the notes that I took. Totally. I can play the review with you. A simple desaltery, phillipic. I have to Google it. I don't know what desaltery means. Either do I. And I didn't Google it, but I was like, no. What does it mean? I didn't Google it. You didn't. Yeah, fuck it. Or how I was Robert McNamara into submission. A simple. Okay, here we go. I got it. A simple desaltery, phillipic, would be a simple, random, disconnected, angry tirade. That's what it is. Another one where he is like doing Dylan and talking about Mueller or mailer. Okay. So another from Paul's solo album. This is a parody of Bob Dylan with many references, but specifically based on Dylan 65 rambling and cryptic masterpiece, subterranean homesick blues. This includes a less than proficient sounding harmonica and a comical reference to Dylan's manager, Albert Grossman. The original subtitle was or how I was Linda B. Johnson in a submission. Robert McNamara was the former CEO of Ford who became the long serving US Secretary of Defense under Kennedy. And Johnson, it was one of the archetypes and architects and champions of the US involvement in the Vietnam War. He quit in 1968 to lead the World Bank and fight poverty and become vocally critical and contrite about the war and his responsibility for it. So real, real lighthearted stuff, right? I lost you at harmonica. This, I liked this song. I mean, it wasn't. Yeah, I mean, here's the thing. It's like everything on this record I liked. I didn't dislike any of it. There's some stuff that I was like, yeah, it's fine. You know, but it's interesting what makes it to the greatest hit. Like, what is that? Like, why, why? I mean, I guess in the same way that when I'm doing a set and I a short set, I just go to my greatest hits. Yeah, I just know they're going to get a better response. Oh my God. Yeah. What, like, let me ask you a question. The question I have for this is like, tell me in time, like, when did you, you know, what was one of your, like, moments in comedy where you were like, holy shit, like, something's happening? Like, this isn't just, it's, you know, this is a moment. This is where I know it's going to turn into something really positive. Other than this. Other than this. Okay. I got to open for Bob Hope in, like, 1995 or 5000 people. And I got to be Bob Hope. It was in Indianapolis. And I mean, I've had a lot of those moments. I guess being on Letterman because my colleagues used to say I would make him laugh. But there are just moments in your career that you go. This is real, like, this is happening. And I have to pinch myself sometimes looking back on things that happen. Like, I got to open for Ray Charles and I got to open for Ann Margaret and Neil Sedaka. And really. Yeah. And I feel like I'm making that up. I love that. Julio Iglesias. But yeah, I feel like I'm making up a lot of things that happen. It really just sounds like you're like, you're just naming some famous person and it's like, yeah, I opened up for, you know, Mark Maguire. Mark Maguire just hit home runs and I went up before him before he did batting practice. Yeah. So what was the question? Like, what a moment, a moment. Yeah. And you would say, opening up for Bob Hope? I think so. I guess. And being on the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson, that was surreal. I remember I'd been doing comedy six years and the talent book or saw me and said, do you want to do the show? And I was like, okay, I still had a day job. And I remember flying back home because I had to go to work on Monday. And I remember thinking in the plane, I could die now and be okay. I'm glad I didn't die because I realized there's more to life than that. But it was this moment where when I met Johnny Carson, I had watched him on TV for years. And it was like I was talking to a hologram. And I remember, I had an uncle who was like this genius doctor. And he never paid that much attention to me ever until I was on the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson. It was like, that was my seal of approval. I know, I know, he was proud of me then. I remember one time I was on Letterman and my mother told all of her friends to watch me. And somebody called the next day and said she was wonderful. Meanwhile, I had been bumped. She did such a good job. I saw you. You look lovely. Yeah, that's all. What about you? When did you feel? Oh, I don't know. I know it's a hard question, Josh. You know, when I knew that it was probably the first time I did the goddamn comedy. Well, no, even then I still, my life has been different since then. And when I got new faces, that was a big deal. And you know, when I take my first, you know, television set, like all those moments were great. But it's only been recently that I've and even I've had success. And I've been independently successful since 2016, where I haven't had to have a regular job. But I still, I still don't like, yeah, I don't know. It's like, someone doesn't realize that I'm doing it. And it's like, I'm just, you feel you're a part of the system and you're part of the machine that I don't feel like I've made it. But in actuality, I've really made it. And I'm doing all this really cool shit. So it's kind of a daily, a daily, you know, was it a prever? I think what they call it, are so bad with words. Make fun of it. It's like a daily, it's a daily kaduki, you know what I mean? You got a, you got a, you got a kaduki spooky sometimes, and you got a manuki, it's totally for the Kardashians. What was I was a, I was a PA for the first two seasons. So I worked very closely with them. And I went through personal S. Yeah, yeah, I, it was the thing was, it was like, this is before they were famous. And it was the first job I got. It was like, literally, the most famous out of them was probably Bruce at that time when he was Bruce, when she, oh, I don't know how to do that anymore, when, when, yeah, when she was Bruce was, oh my god, am I gonna get canceled? When, when Caitlin was Bruce. Yes, yes, when she was still referring to herself as, as Bruce. But it was, it was just watching that first season, which I had just moved to L.A. And I was like, you know, I was a mess. And then, and then we started the second season and that second season, that once the first one was released, it just blew up. And just like the budget went up and it was great, man. We traveled, you know, went to Mexico, we went to Breckenridge, we went to New Orleans. And the cool thing was, I, the cool thing was, I ran into one of the sisters, I ran into, oh god, I wish, I wish, I wish I met O.J. Simpson. Yeah, it sucks, man. He had, you know, he's innocent. I mean, I mean, according to the court of law, I mean, he did it. Yeah. I have a really funny O.J. Simpson joke. I'm not going to do it because it's longer, but. I have time. No, maybe later. All right, I'll tell it to you later. Let's get through these, let's get through a couple more songs and then I'll tell it to you to end the podcast, okay? Because it's funny. At least I think it's funny. All right. For Emily, whenever I may find her, while likely written about his girlfriend at the time, Kathy, people have assumed the name, Emily was a tribute to the poet Emily Dickinson, who had already been mentioned in the dangling conversation. The song of longing that Paul has said was less about the loss of a girl than a loss of belief. This is sung completely by art with Paul on a 12 string acoustic guitar. Beautiful song about loss, thoughts on it. I love this song and I loved when the songs are art forward. I love when he's the voice. Art has such a beautiful voice, like a way better voice than I think that nothing against Paul. Then Steven, then Steven Wright, he has a better voice than Steven Wright. No, I don't know. I've never heard Steven Wright sing. "Are you going to Scarborough Fair?" But yes, the dangling participle song or whatever, the dangling conversation, when he mentions Emily Dickinson, I think that's when I was like, that is pretend. I felt like it was a little too artsy, but yeah, I don't know who was written for Emily was written for. I don't know which Emily or Kathy it was written for, but I love that song. Great song, probably one of the more beautiful songs on the record. It's up there, I think with Scarborough Fair. It's in my love pile. Yes, oh, for sure. Totally. What is the, what is it that you love so much about art's voice compared to like Paul's? I love Paul's voice too. Don't get me wrong. In the documentary, Paul was saying that his mother said you have a good voice, but art has a great voice, and that always like inflamed his maybe competitiveness or desire to achieve on his own. I don't know. I'm not a psychologist. I went into comedy instead, but art's voice is just, it's so pure and it's angelic. The song all I know, which was his song, like not Simon and Garfunkel. Do you know that song? Yes, I love it. I just think that's one of the most beautiful songs ever. And you know, in my deep dive, I found that his two children, both are musicians, as are Paul's four children, are musicians. They're all unique. But yeah, Art Garfunkel, it's delicious. Love, love. All right. A poem on the Underground Wall, another song of desperation and rebellion. This was inspired by the cover photo shoot for Wednesday morning 3 a.m. This is actually really funny. They had spent hours, have you, so Adam, pull up the cover for Wednesday morning 3 a.m. This is their, this is their debut record. Now, this is why it's extremely funny as you pull this up. They had spent hours in the subway station at Fifth Avenue and 53rd Street shooting hundreds of photos trying to get the perfect James Dean shot. But they couldn't. Adam, you got it coming up? Because I wanted to see this while we look for it. They realized though that all the shots were ruined because somebody had graffitied fuck you on one of the walls. So it had to be edited out. Good. Great. Can you see if you can find it, the fuck you version? Adam, I don't know if it even exists, but can you see if you can find the fuck you? Have you ever been censored or had to deal with any controversies? When I first moved to LA and I worked at the Improv a lot. But Friedman, who found me, he didn't like me saying the word fuck. But then over the years he got lax about that. So no, I don't feel censored. I censor myself. It depends on the audience. You can kind of tell if they're into it. I just, I do remember saying fuck once and there were like these nuns sitting in the front. Really? I would never call you. I would never call you like, not even saying like dirty or like filthy at all by any means, but it's like, you're not really like edgy. So it's like maybe, I think that's kind of why. I mean, if you, I'm not saying if you save, like you saying fuck will get a reaction because they're not expecting it out of you. So it's like if you do it at the right time, it's, it's a, that's a huge laugh, probably. Right. I mean, my joke where I, my dad put a swear jar in our kitchen when I was in high school, I am going to go to my reunion, by the way. Thank God. Yeah, of course. Please. So my dad put a swear jar because my friend's Patty Alberman and Grace Hirschhorn and I started swearing a lot. And so he put a swear jar in the kitchen. Every time we swore we had to put a quarter in the jar. And then at the end of the year, we took the money and we went to the fucking Bahamas. And that is when I say fuck in my act. Yeah. And up until that point, I haven't. And that gets a huge laugh. And then I say it a couple of more times. But I've been, I've been known to swear a lot. Sure. Yeah. For me, you've probably seen clips or if you've seen me at all, the clips are from TV. So no, I'm not going to swear there. Of course not. Of course not. But you know, when it's right. But I'm from Long Island. How, how, how, how, if you're, you know, somebody cuts you off, you're driving, Calabasas, somebody cuts you off. Do you say you cuts there or do you just give the finger or do you just, you just push it down? I don't have road rage. I have parking lot rage at Trader Joe. Yes. That's when I get angry. But I'm, I'm kind of zen about it. I think it might be a gender thing because I know a lot of men who get very angry on the road. But I'm like, all right, unless I'm in a hurry. Yeah. I, well, parking lot, the parking lot of Trader Joe's might be the seventh layer of hell. Like it's not. They built them all like on Indian burial grounds or something, right? A little Indian burial. A little tiny one. But, and, and, and, and a deal. And it got a deal on it. And it was like with red pepper hummus. They traded for, for a little space. All right. Last song on the record, seven o'clock Saturday night. This one was a little weird. It interpol, wait, it interpol, I don't get him in Morty wrote a word that I don't know. Basically it takes the classic tender Christmas song with it. It's how dumb I am. I'm like reading it. I'm like, I don't even know, interpolatus. It wove in. It wove the classic tender Christmas song with a news broadcast created for the recording which highlights many of the social issues of the day, like the war in Vietnam and the death of Lenny Bruce. Thoughts on that? Thoughts on how they end the record. And it gets louder. Like the voice gets louder. So what I loved about this song is I love the song Silent Night. I'm a Jew who loves Christmas songs and I sing them when I get nervous. But so I was thinking, Art Garfunkel should just record an album of Christmas songs because there's, it's beautiful. But then I just thought he fucked it up with the news. I mean, I understand what they were saying. They were being political and I feel like the artists at that time were trying to make statements and be politically aware and active. So I don't blame them. I just don't love, I don't love that. No, you look, in different time, I mean, you know, everybody kind of in the folk scene was in a sense a part of the counterculture from what I have read and, you know, Dylan, a lot of his songs were very, you know, you know, against the war. And so I think they're trying to make a statement here. You know, I understand what they're doing. You know, it's not, it's not bad. It's, but it's, it's not my favorite way to end the record. I thought the record was, was, you know, was great. And then you just do that. You're like, all right. Right. You know, but not bad. This is, it says, wasn't as proud as the song, Voices of Old People on bookends. Yes. People at the zoo. Like hilarious, hilarious. But again, he was trying to be creative and, and use what was around him. And so I don't fault him for that. No, all in all good record. I'm trying to wonder if there's any, any question. Look here, this is, this has nothing to do with Silent Night or anything because he has more you wanted me to ask you how political do you allow yourself to get in your act. But I don't want to talk politics. It's already, there's too much shit going on in the world. So I want to say, what is, you know, we already talked about was a moment where you knew, you know, you knew when, you know, something's happening in your career. What is your, what is like your swan song moment and stand up? What is the moment where you're like, it can't get better than this? This is, this is your favorite moment so far in your career. You mean other than this? Shut up, dude. Don't do that. If the joke worked the first time. No, no, I'm being serious. When the, when the, um, what, what is my swan song? Like what, did it already happen? No, no, not your swan. So I mean, that was maybe like, what's like, what has been like your, your utmost, like, favorite moment or even, you know, you might have mentioned it, whether it was Johnny Carson or it was Letterman. I don't think it's happened yet. It's so sad. Is that fair? Is that fair? Why? It's so much great shit. Hey, you know what? I know I, I not, yeah, I agree. I've been very lucky and I feel proud, but I, I just don't think whatever it is has happened yet. I love that. Is that too big? Not at all. Not at all. All right. Here's a better question. Okay. What's the, what's the first thing you bought with your money when you started making money? What's, is it, what's the first thing that like extravagant purchase you bought? I actually bought clothing and I remember wearing it thinking I bought this from money that I earned, telling jokes to strangers that I thought up in my head in my bedroom. That was like mind-blowing. That's insane. So yeah, what, it's a big perch. I don't know. I can't think. That's perfect. What about you? What about you? Oh man. I know I'm not interviewing you, but I'm just curious. I got, I mean, I guess like, I got my dog, that was the first real perch and my Dyson on the same day when I got my first Comedy Central money. You know, and then I got, I guess, at least, at least cars. I got a big, a big deal is when I got my, I don't have it anymore, but the, in January 2020, I got a Porsche Macon S. It was like, so it's like a sports car SUV or a sport utility vehicle, and it was like a goal to have it. And I, but I like hit it. I didn't get it to show off. I like, literally got it for myself. And as like a, as a way to like celebrate the success that I've been having and then the world shut down. It was great, but then the world shut down and I never. Yeah, but you could use your Dyson then. Yes. I have a new one at this point. I sold the other one to my friend, I sold the other one to my friend Avery, which I feel bad because it, you know, that was back when I lived in a carpeted apartment in LA and it was like, you know, just probably like poo particles and like from the dog and, you know, it just, it was bad. And he bought it. I think you know, he bought it for me for like a hundred bucks and then he had to throw it out. And so I return my Dyson the day after I got it. It didn't work. It really? Yeah. I guess I got a lemon. So then I bought a shark. I cannot believe I'm talking about vacuum. No, no, no, I get it. Here, let's, let's wrap this up, baby. Look, it's just so much fun. This was so great. Thank you so much for coming on, Wendy. I can't think of this. It's so much fun. All right. I asked these questions to everybody. What's your favorite song on the record? What is not mad? Can I tell you my favorite song of Simon and Garfunkel's? Sure. But then you got to do this record. I will. I will. My favorite song of Simon and Garfunkel is America. Yeah. I love that song. My favorite song on this album is Homeward Bound. What's your least favorite song? Oh, my least favorite song. I guess it would be Big Bright Green Pleasure Machine. Okay. What? This is so sweet. I would have to phrase this. Can you fuck to this record? I only fuck to white noise. I don't know. You just turned on channel 001. You could fuck to this record, but I would have to turn off Big Bright Green Pleasure Machine because that's just a yeah. It's a vibe. Yeah, just start with Scarborough Ferris. It's, you know, even though it's like, it's very, you know, 1700s or whatever. It definitely... It's Turkey Leg. It's Turkey Leg Music. You can, I think you can fuck to it. It's quick too. It's 21 minutes. You might be able to get through it. You might. It's a beautiful album. I love this album. I'm so glad you made me listen to it. Oh, my God. Thank you. All right. What would be your way to, if you had to sum up this record to get somebody to listen to it, like, how do you sum this record up? It's beautiful. Early. Simon and Garfunkel. They take chances, but it's recognizable. You'll love it. I love that. Wendy, thank you so much for coming on. Thank you. Have you packed. Please. You're so great. I'd love to see it. I love "Come to the Jam." We're doing the one July 21st. Come be a part of it. Do you say it? Where is it? To the comedy store. I sing, but I used to sing, but then I smoked too much pot and ruined my vocal cords. But I did, like I was always Eliza and Dorothy in plays. But in high school, they... I joined the choir and they taught me how to sign. I'm just doing material for you. Okay. But yes, I do sing. I did a fucking sing along. Oh, you did. You did. Well, we'll stay in touch. I'd love to have you on sometime, right? This is great. Thank you so much. I had a great time. Thank you, darling. What I tell you, the one and only Wendy Lieman. Follow her on all social media at Wendy Lieman or go to Wendy Lieman.com for more information. Check out her new special, Taller on TV available on Amazon and go see her at Flappers. All right, for new music this week, brought to you in part by Distro Kid is Window by Painted Shield. And you can find all the links on our website, the500podcast.com. And if you are in a band and want that music of yours featured on the podcast, send us your song to 500podcast.com and we will play it. Put the album and artist and influence you in the subject line. And man, oh man, we'll get you. What's up next? Oh, shit. Next week, nine inch nails downward spiral. Oh, it's gonna get dark. Dig your homework, do it, screw it, couple who. 4 years I wouldn't say that evil did not exist. How stupid could I be? It had its way with me. It wore a mother's dress. Told me it loved me fast. Then in the latter day, it made my strength away. Now I'm feeling now like it's worth flying high against a wing. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. How can you resist? These the donuts dance. How can you descend? Such a secret care. Be invisible. Ask control of you now. My school has been moving. Held down by puppet strings. I cut those strings at night. And what's really me takes flight now. Cutting now. Lucky bird flying high above the wing. Oh, oh, flying high above the grass. There's flying high above the wing. Oh, oh, flying high above the grass. Wing. Oh, oh, oh, oh. The 500. Keep it if please see. For the flu's nation. On the 500. For the 500. Hey there, I'm Johnny Christ from a Venge 7-Fold and I've got a podcast called Drinks with Johnny you're going to want to check out. I sit down with a bunch of different people from all different walks of life from professional wrestlers to actors, comedians, fighters, musicians, everything in between. I'm just looking to make some friends and have a good time doing it. So if that sounds like something you're into go check out Drinks with Johnny streaming everywhere now. The Helping Friendly podcast explores the music and fan experience of fish through interviews and deep dives on shows and tours. For more than 10 years we've created insightful and fun discussions about our favorite band and with the help of our guests and thematic series we're still discovering new angles of appreciation for fish. And when the band is on tour we provide a review of every show the following day. As one of our listeners said, "Any fish fans that enjoy meandering conversations and incredible insight on new and old fish shows this is for you highly recommend." It's not just about the band and the shows it's about the journey getting there. Throughout 2024 we're going to be running down the top 25 fish tours of all time and that'll be interspersed with show reviews and regular episodes. Join us and check out the Helping Friendly podcast wherever you get your podcasts.
