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Talkin' Kop
This Has No Name | The Pilot
This podcast is part of the Sports Social Podcast Network. This podcast doesn't have a name. I think my name that this has no name. It is a podcast. It is the Poiler episode. I'm Gav and that's Phil. It's good to know that nobody is watching as well because you're too busy celebrating England football thing in the world. What this podcast is about? It's born out of the fact that when we try to talk on the talking cop about football, we end up going on tangents about all sorts of stuff. We said, "Why don't we make a podcast just dedicated to all the stuff?" That's what we're going to do. Word people are watching. You can come up with names if you'd like. By next week, we should have a team. We should have graphics behind us. We should have our names up on the screen. We've gone as plain as we possibly can. What can we expect from the podcast, Phil? Well, Steve will be going to go on a call once a month. We have Steve and I don't know. We'll make it up and it's going to be great. We might have more people. And actually, Gav, we're going to do it. If we can get this going and we're enjoying it, we're going to do more than just a couple. We're going to try to fit as many actual live ones in the real men. I'm careful as a great live. We can just pre-record and put them up. We can sit down. We can sit down as a crew and sit down. If we record for two hours and then I can go back to what I used to love the best, which was editing this stuff. You're taking the editing duties away from me and you're going to take them on board. I'm liking this already. Under live ones. If we do live ones, you're going to edit them and I'm going to do the artwork. Okay. We have really deadly names for them every week. Will we make up deadly names for them every week? Catchy names and stuff like that. We might have some old timers pop in to say hello and the live ones as well because they're the people who won't mention names. And then we could pick people. This is like a brainstorm and session. A very public one. But then we could try to get people that are interested that we think are a bit mad and we could say, "Come on. Come on and have a chat." There might be some spots. There might be some spots, but this show is dedicated to not being about sport, but there might be some sport in there. This is dedicated to where we fit, which is fellas getting older. It's definitely fellas getting older because when I was thinking about stuff, it was like loads of stuff that I think about. And I yearn for it. It doesn't happen anymore. That's stupid things. So that's where I'd like it to go. But I also want to be, I want us to give our view on calling the first in our own spiritual way. So that's where it's going to be. If you think you have a good name for it, throw it in, throw it in. But we don't want our names in it. I don't want our names in it. We don't want that. And we just want to talk about, look, when we do shows like this, we're hoping we can do them live on YouTube channel where people can come in and give that point of view and give ideas for us to talk to. But we're definitely going to bring three of our topics each week. And that, like we don't even feel down disgusting. It's like feel just text me too. And I text me too. And you're not a little bit of them. You have to talk about them. So that's where we are with them. And to be fair, I even had to ask after he spelled something wrong on one of his topics. And till he told me what it was, and then I kept it straight away, I was like, no, I haven't back. Yeah, okay. I didn't, I kind of wanted to try away a bit. But you were like, no, no, it's savage. Because it walks into us growing older. It walks into that pair. So when we start with a topic, should we start with a topic? Do you want to go force below, go force? No, you go force guard because I want to, I would like to finish and I'll give people so that they can, they get look forward to this, right? Right. My topic I'd like to finish on is the Olympics. And what sports in the Olympics are actually world game sports and what should be put into it instead of those sports, right? So you want to take stuff out of the Olympic games and put them into the world games? Okay. The sports, the stuff in there aren't even sports. And we get on to that later on, right? Yeah, it's okay. Eat my, eat my goat all day long and we can, and everything, right? The first thing, so, you go to force? Well, I just want to throw this up much because it was on the show last night and I don't want to be able to listen back, I doubt you have. But at the end of the show was at last night or Sunday night, Emma was telling us about the wife carrying championship, which is in Finland. And it's basically men with their wallet. Yeah, no, but it's actually strange. Yeah, the wife is basically the most effective way to do this is her knees and her knees are opening her shoulders and you lock your arms around this way, right? Yeah. And she puts her arm around her waist, but her head's based down your back side, right? And then you won't lend to the field and you have to go through water and stuff like this, right? And show you avoid drowning her because that's obviously what they're doing in that. And then you come out to your side and it's the quickest to the end of the course. I've actually watched the championships. Yeah. Oh, she says, well, this podcast will be better on a separate channel from the top and top. It will be on a separate channel. No, it will be. It's it will be 100%. It'll be its own thing. We just wanted to do the toilet on here because a couple of reasons. One, we wanted to run a boy, I remember, because he was like, oh, crack. And, you know, he's he's kind of gay. But when we go out and tangents, the mass majorities are okay. And here we have a time to set up YouTube channels, or indeed the podcast, but we will do that in the next week or so. And hopefully, because I'm not here next week, but yeah, hopefully. And let's be honest about it as well. There's not really much going on. If you took away the international football, there's literally nothing else going on. No, but this is going to be a separate entity. Yeah. This is separate. This is often it's on the men who share with the clouds. There could be anything like that. You know what I mean? Yeah, well, that's why I've scaled up. He said he's a middle-edge man. That's what I was at. She put on the clouds. Right. The first thing I want to talk about, and I was thinking about this the other day, is breed counting. I don't understand this. So this is why I didn't even ask you about this one. You did say it was immense. So let me let me give you a bit of a backstory. I have a child. He's four years of age. He goes to bed. Right. But in the last little world, since we got him his new big bed, he's kind of like, "Wow, will you avoid me while I fall asleep?" Right. Because he's a bit intimidated by the big bed. In the smaller bed, he just went there and went to sleep. That was it. So what I do is, I get into the bed and I find the best way for him to go asleep is for me to loit there pretending to be asleep. Right. Right. Talking to him and, you know, holding his hand or whatever, it doesn't more pretend to be asleep. So I loite there and we put on this kind of piano-y fucking music or waterfalls in the background and all this shit. And we loite there and I literally, and it worked on me. I mean, my daughter went too much younger. So you loite there and you close your eyes, but you kind of breathe a little bit heavy. So they think, "Jesus, he's going to sleep. I better go asleep because he's a lot older than me." And he's a little bit of your player. So, you know, the psychology's art. Right. Right. Right, far, right? Well, I'm hoping to think that way. I'm thinking of Adam, right? So, basically, I was lying there. He's actually thinking Lego Star Wars. He could be. But I was lying there last night. I was lying down and what I do is, when I think he's nearly asleep, I say to me, "Really? I'm nearly there now. I fucking nearly have my sleep. I can, you know, quietly make an exit. I would just roam and I'd be, you know, everyone's fucking happy." So, when you're lying there and you think he's nearly asleep, you start counting. I start counting in my own head. Count to 60. And if he hasn't moved in that 60 seconds and, you know, I think he's asleep, it's a good chance to fucking escape, right? But then I was thinking, "It's very fucking hard to loite there with your lawyers' clothes. Breathing, right? Wear your breathing and counting." Try it. It's fucking, it's mad, right? So, what happens is, your breathing either syncs with the speech accountant or the speech accountant syncs with the tempo that you're breathing in. Look, you know, you don't look at your breathing in and out and out and we're going to sleep. I'm trying to count, one, two, three, four, five, six. It's fucking near you and impossible. Well, can I tell you something? This is bad, right? Now I get it, right? Can I tell you something, right? Yeah. Do you know, no matter what you do, your accountant is going to match your heart rate? Possibly, yeah. Well, then... No, no, as you settle down, as you start to breathe, right? And you start to count. This is where people fall asleep. They'll just take stuff like... Right. Don't even relax. You can start off really fast and eventually you'll start to slow down, but you'll slow down to what your underlying heart rate is, right? Yeah. You'll sync with your own heart rate, which will happen to them. There are two people that tell you to count sheep, right? So as you count on your heart rate and you've settled into it, right, you're getting into the rhythm of your heart rate. Yeah. That causes you to get a whole body to relax. What happens next? But what happens next? Oh, no, no, no. The main receptor is open. I know I was holding those eyes. I'm getting that, but... He's sitting there going, "spoid a man. Sonic the Hedgehog. Batman. I'm going to run around the forest." This fella here is falling asleep. He's gone. Oh my God. Yeah. He sneaks out of the room instead. But not what I'm saying is, when you actually... It ended up where I... It ended up where I was trying to challenge myself flying into bed last night. Boy gone, right? Just breathe normal. So I breathe. I just breathe normal for five seconds. Then it's just right. Now we're adding the count. And see if you can count at a steady count where your breathing says the exact same way. And you can't do it. You can't actually do it. Because what happens is you end up... When you breathe in, you go one and you breathe out, you go two. Yeah? Or... You know what I mean? It ends up sinking itself up. So listen, I know it's a weird thing to start off on. What I'm saying is, it's a challenge for people. When you're going to bed tonight, breathe for ten seconds is normal. And then while you're breathing in and out, try count on a different kind of rhythm to the breathing. And it's just fucking... You won't be able to... Because as I said, it's kind of a secret. The problem is even very low heart rate when I relax. Remember calling toward you is to say, you're not telling me to shoot. So I ended up then having to take pictures of what my heart rate is. My rest and heart rate is and send it to him so that he could see that I wasn't lying about what my rest and heart rate is, right? Yeah. Because when I was getting... Every time I'm going into getting an operation done or whatever, the warning alarm keeps going off on the machine. You know when you're relaxed? Yeah. You're lying, right? So they put the taking your finger and it matters your heart rate, right? But my rest and heart rate is in the mid-torties, and sometimes you know it, right? So it goes below 30 beats a minute. The alarm goes off. Do you think... Do you think if this feeling gets too relaxed, he's giving up on life? It's not what you're doing. And at least you're there with the D for him going, "Fucking hell!" Like, is your missus... Like, it's the feeling like you're on the wall in your Catholic. So when you start watching stuff on the Sunday night and you're tired and you don't want to go to work on one day, and that's that dropping nose. You're just fucking zapping you on the sofa and fucking hell. I think this man is doing it three times during whatever's going on Sunday night, you know? And the problem I have is that if I get startled in the middle of the night, right? And I stand up too quickly. I get really dizzy. If I get up too quickly when my heart rate's that low, I faint. So it's like... That's couch and shit, right? Yeah. They're putting those. But that's what happens. Last couple, it was amazing. The mid-torties. Just filming. But then I was starting to think of stuff like, you know? When I say this might be a stupid thing to say to you, because then I started thinking of little things you challenge yourself on. Right. And that's a stupid thing to argue, because you're doing 200 kilometres on a bike and stuff like that. So challenges are, you know, in the Hapley place when it comes to you. Then I started thinking about stupid things you challenge yourself on. So I'm sure people remember this, right? Maybe not. But when you made a cup of tea, everyone went through a period in their life when they were making a cup of tea. So cup of tea, you put the cup down on the counter. Yeah, you're waiting for the kettle to boil. And boredom setting. Because kettles take roughly three minutes to boil. And the treatment is the longest fucking three minutes of your life. So what do you do? What I do, I use to take tea bags out of the tub that the tea bags were in. And I'd be trying them at the cup. Yeah. I'd be trying them at the cup. And in my own head pretending I was trying that. And if you got three in the cup from a certain distance, like that was 180. You know what I mean? So I was starting to think about little things that you challenge yourself. Is there any little things you challenge yourself to do during the day? Is there any stupid things you do? Look. It's a lot of stupid things you do. It's a lot of challenges. You know what we're throwing something in the bin? The bin is in the corner, right? And it's a round bin, right? It's a round shape bin. So there's a little bit of the back of the bin where it does that a little bit where it can hit the wall and go down the back of the bin. Yeah. So there's only a bit, like, did I ever find yourself throwing something in the bin and just before you're throwing it, you're thinking that you're so conscious, I can get this. You know, this is a big trial. Like, it's a fucking piece of paper. But it's a big trial. Do you not do that? No. I'm starting to feel really weird here. Yeah. I think you need to reevaluate. Yes. Yeah. So that's a couple. He says, hold on. He's got retelling Michael Allen's story about throwing out the apple car. No, no, that's not so bad. No, it was not a bit like that. No, to be fair, to be fair, I did. There's literally everything I'm doing. My thing isn't about one thing. It's like I like to do several things at once, right? Mm-hmm. So I might be trying to open the fridge, close the press and also grab a cup on the other side of the second. And you've only two arms? You've only two arms, right? Yeah. So you're going to have to use your leg at one of these as well to navigate this way, right? Yeah. It's hard to just add to difficulty level. And then when you drop something, you go, "How does that happen?" It obviously happened because you've only got two arms. Yeah, you shouldn't do that. Listen, the breathing thing is impossible. If there's anybody out there that can count at a different rhythm to the breathing after four seconds, I think it's amazing. Oiki levels are off the chain. Matt says, "When I'm walking with the male, he's a male man. He's a male man in Canada." He says, "I'll throw some heavy metal on and try to match my stride to the beat. It can really get me open." You can look like a fucking Leona thing. The legs have gone 90. You know, absolutely 90. The breath counts are still fascinating. Look, I've never, as I said, the thing for me, as I was being held to relax and calm down, it's actually in a moment, in a stressful moment, or even in a big moment where I just need to sort of relax away. That's where I've sort of managed to use the breath thing. That's where it ends up sinking with your heart rate. You can control your heart rate and reduce your heart rate down. Am I trying to beat me heart rate here? Am I trying to feel me heart rate? What do you do with him? This massive, you know, paragon challenge? The problem you have is that in reality, what you're trying to do is you're trying to count him out. That's what you're trying to do, okay? The reality is, you'll end up counting yourself out. That's just why it's got to be. I need to knock this on the head. Yeah, or have one airborne in the air and stick on the prodigy and be able to get your heart rate up so you can count faster and heavier sleep quicker. What do you want me to do? Jump and jacks beside the bed. You know, you're fucking absolutely sweating. Heart rate of 100 and eight. Go on, he'll be fucking asleep in a minute. I just thought I bring that up because, like, genuinely, it was like, when I was coming down this day as last night, I was like, "That is fucking mad." To the point where I said, "I'm not forgetting this." And I text you straight away because it is the sort of thing when I go, "I was something deadly." And it's clearly not deadly, but it's something really interesting. It's clearly not even interesting. But to me, it was like, "Wow, I have to tell Phil this." I need to tell him this. And the thing is, I hate telling you things because what happens is, I'm usually telling you things that someone else has told me to tell you because I'm really getting annoyed over this in the last couple of weeks where people see mad stuff and just immediately associate you with it and then go, and instead of finding you, they just come to me and go, "Listen, you wouldn't deal with the favor." Just let Phil know about the charity horizon or the fucking wife Harry and R. You know, anything bizarre, you see, they just immediately think you will go, "Wow, who is his personal assistant, Gav?" And then I have to fucking take it. And then if we forget... Keep it go. I sent you a link. Did you not send it to Phil? Like, as if, you know, the pain me wages or something. But no, so that's what I wanted to start on. I do have another topic later, and I have a tour room that I was talking about on the show last night. That I wanted to get your input on later, but we get into it. And it is spot for people. So, cuz I'm sorry to let's get into the flow of this. I was there. Mine are sort of two sports related ones, right? But we'll see if anyone can take you any examples that are non-sport related. So, for mine, I'm going to go with my not my biggest one, but this one. I want to know why organizations are going out of their way to over-complicate the qualifying out with different competitions, right? So, I'm looking at the euros, and it's just a mess, right? I'm looking at most of what they've done with the Champions League. It's an absolute mess, right? In terms of, like, it's just, it's not even a competition anymore. Why can't they just make everything simple again? That's all I want. Make everything simple again so that it makes sense. So, like, take these euros, right? If you have, if you have 24 teams, hang on, hang on. You have 24 teams in the euros, right? And you need 16 to get you into the next round, right? Logic to take that you do 8 groups of 3 with the top 2 going through, right? I have another way of doing it. That we can, if you want to do it, that's fine. But I'm just saying the simplest and the most effective way is 8 groups of 3, top 2 going through, and that means drawers then stop becoming an ambitious team. Teams will forget drawers to try and get a win. They have to get a win because you only play 2 matches, right? Yeah. Yeah. That's the only way it works. Well done, it wouldn't lead to less games. It's the exact same amount of games. It is. Yeah. Because at the moment you're 24 teams playing 3 games. Yeah. And then you'd only have 24 teams playing 2 games. 3 games. You make some groups. Oh, yeah. Yeah, okay. Yeah. And 2 extra groups. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There's no money in common sense. What do I do is, right? All you would have, I've only, I've just taught it so it could be wrong. Right. Fuck it. Yeah. We're in the safe space. Nice. Six groups of all as it is, right? The top 2 go through. Right. So that leaves, that leaves, you need 4 more teams. You need 4 more teams. Yeah. Why don't you just pick, like, the six toward places, right? And then just raffle off to 4 come places to make a, right? The 2 bottom teams. Yeah. They're fucking 2 bottom teams in as well, right? So. 20 teams. No, listen. And then what you do is you make all of them play a one-art match to get in to join the 12. Because now you've added an extra week to the tournament. Fuck them. Should've decided that was the one. No. Mine makes much, yours is ridiculous. I'm now back there. Yeah, probably is. Sorry. So I'll delete that. The A groups, the 3 teams, 24, top 2 go through it. I have a brilliant idea. I have a brilliant idea, right? You need 16. Right. Right. Just have A groups of 4. And the top 2 go through. That's it. Now you've got up to 22 teams. But it doesn't matter. Yeah, Grant. When I'm talking about A groups of A groups of 4. They get more group games. But I'm happy with that field quid. And then you just- Everyone's happy with the field quid. Top 2. Go through it. Let's just fuck off. But this is, this is what my thing is simple for it. Don't make it more complicated, right? Because at one stage tonight they are trying to walk out because I think two teams had the same amount of points. But one team had one more yellow carrot than the other team. And at that team they had the less yellow carrot. Stayed with the draw. They'd finish it ahead of the team. This is ridiculous. Yeah. It doesn't make any sense. Make things simple again. So they're always asking. So how many other organizations have these ridiculously overcomplicating ways of qualifying tutorials? I'm not even just talking about qualifying to get into tutorials. I'm talking about your into tutorials. Robby. How mad it gets. Robby is crazy, right? I'm going to put it there. The new All Orange System. I know there won't be many guy people in the commentary. But this is like the guy where we're sitting there going this knockout tournament we've had for over 100 years. We leave the old soccer lads in or nothing. We're going to show you how to qualify for something. So you get knocked out of the knockout round and you get put back in. For a league stage. We should get knocked out of this thing a little far times. To be completely out of it. To be out of it. They literally have 22 teams, right? Possibly more. Do New York go into it. New York used to be out in London. So it was 24. And do boy. In Australia. But the thing with this is that they have a league system and then they have knockouts. But if you get knocked out of the knockout, you can come back in and play again. It used to call it the backdoor system and everyone was like, "Oh, man, I've got to get into the backdoor here." I'm like, "Man, I'm not sure. Why do we keep fucking putting up with this?" For a team that keeps losing back in. It's looking great. But I think the way it walks now is that they have this kind of league system, right? And the top team in the league goes straight into the quarterfinals. And then the second team goes into a playoff. If you finish second, you can do a playoff. And then if you lose that playoff, you're out. So do you simplify it a little bit? But remember, years ago gone, "Oh, I fucking held late and made last stage during the week to Zamaa. Do you not have any guy there that we get?" Back in again. The back in again. And the thing is, if you win this one, straight into the semi-foil, it's not fucking about it. Isn't it a classic word as you actually go on? If they want to complicate the tournament, we'll show you how to complicate the tournament. We won't even have group stage at the start. Sticking the middle tournament, right? Yeah. But it allows you to get knocked out at the start and you're a chance to pull back in, have a go again, get knocked out. And then if they win one game, they might get into this league for Zays. Have the league phase. And then still not get knocked out because you could finish towards in a group of four and a group of three and a group of two and a group of four, right? Just random numbers in a group and then see what happens at the end of it. And if we like the color of your jerseys, you're into the quarterfinals. It's just, it's intense. Yeah. Whoever got the most votes in a second constituency, like if we've got a lot of votes up in a league, it leads them. It leads them to be just put straight into the course, you know, because he knows the fella down in the guy. Mad stuff. But is there any other, any other mad qualifying stuff? This episode is brought to you by our good friends at NFL Sunday Ticket on YouTube TV. I'm sure by now you've all gotten back into your Sunday routines, but they could be even better. With NFL Sunday Ticket and YouTube TV, you get the most live NFL games all in one place every game. Every Sunday. And you can even watch up to four different games at once with multi-view. One of my favorite inventions of this decade. It's exactly what you need to catch all the action. Make your Sundays more magical. And also, YouTube TV is great. I got it this year. It's awesome. Sign up now at youtube.com/BS. Device and content restrictions apply. Local and national games on YouTube TV. NFL Sunday Ticket for Out of Market Games excludes digital only games. Well, I was thinking. I think the final one is horrendous. The final one is like there's 10 rounds of qualifying, right? Yeah. And your mind was stopping. It just forced. Well, you don't. But at least, but at least it makes sense because every time the slow lads, they get knocked now, you're right. That's where you'll start there and then get it and you're ill. So then it just gets down to the last. That makes sense to me. But then they had to start to have sprint races to see if they can get extras in their lads. Look, you have it right. Don't be all messing with it now. Like, stop messing with it. I was thinking about the NFL. Did they have that right? They do. Because they've seen before that. So they've got six and six. The two groups are six, right? Yeah. Top teams all go through. And then the best, the second, the second place lads go through and then the two best of the rest, right? You can't finish toward whatever. So you could be in a conference that has all three go through and you could be the fourth place team, but because your record is better than everyone else, you still go through. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Which makes sense to me in terms of what's there. But I think the farmer is mad. Yeah. So they have practice one, practice two, qualifying one, two, three. Like, what's to say, a fella that has a short lap, right? He gets knocked out. So you could throw him out on the next one and he can have a daily lap. They should just listen. They should go back and they should go. Do you know what? Even if they wanted to do these three qualifying things for Teddy, right? They want to do these three qualifying things for Teddy. So why don't you just go, right? This one's going to happen. This one's going to happen. You're going to go out on qualifying one. Okay. And boom. You're going to put in your best lap. And then in qualifying two, you're going to do the same. And all the carrots get to go three times. And then the add up your three times, the void them by three and that's your score. Because you could have a fella that was kind of, you know, flew off of a corner. And that was his flying lap. And he gets stung for it. But keep them all in it. But they just keep like knocking fellas out, knocking fellas out. He's going to stay up for it. I don't like the farmer the one I think. Matt is right about baseball as well. They play it. So let me read this. He says, "Make everything baseball." You play 162 games and six ones. Yeah. But only about 10 teams make the playoffs. With a halfway point of the season, almost half the league are playing for not. Yeah. The fans turn up just to go on the rip in the stands. Do they play every day? They play every day. Every day. There's none of this, like, play a restaurant. Like, you're out every day. So over the course of, like, a hundred and, say, 90 days, they have a hundred and sixty to your matches. Yeah. And this is in America. Like, this is like, lads, all your style is down to New York. We're going to, with four stadiums in New York, is going to all play. But this is all over the country. All over. And it's like, they go, right, we're having to get a series here. Like, just a random series. It's not like it means anything. It's just like, well, we're going to play you in three games in a row. And then we're going to play you. And then you come back to where you play three games in a row. And then that's it. Then you move on to the next set of games. That's not trophies. There's no nothin'. It's just like, that's what it is. And then eventually, yeah. I guess baseball is definitely in there. Oh, hold on. He's quite a foil about saying, the most you can play in a row is 20 days now. Okay. It's in a row. But it's not even, look, don't get me wrong. Baseball is not the most physical of games. You know what I mean? You swing up by your room from one, two, three. But let's try the ball. The last trouble ball that I am just fucking hanging off. You can't even get the arm up by the end of half of the series. Hanging off the right. But what I'm saying is it's not that. That's not a slink. That's a slink to our point. I'm sure there's a team in New York, right? But then there's one like, there's definitely one in LA, yeah? There's one in LA. There could be one down there. Yeah. There's the new Mexico. There could be one up in like Seattle. So like you could be. San Diego. Do they even walk it out and say, right? Like listen. Chicago, two teams. New York of two teams. But what I'm saying is, do they walk it out where they go, right? Listen. We'll try to reduce the amount of travel. You're not going to go up in New York to LA and then back to Boston. Do you don't give a bollocks, do you? Boy. So look, you could play in New York on a Freudian. Yeah. I'm like, you're on a plane and flow you to LA and play Saturday night. Saturday morning. I'm flying ahead and go. We could be a bit late for this. Tell the referee for the LA. It's traffic in the air. It's a traffic jam over there. Big is waiting here. Jesus Christ. Hold on. The pitchers only walk one and four of theirs. So that's a bad time job. Of course. The rest of us, Lance. Do you know what the bad one is? I pray cars. Now he's doing his trial on the balls once every four of theirs. So hold on. This fella. That's when steroids. Wow. That is fucking unbelievable. Like, that must be the madness, the sparks for the travel and the thing. You know what I mean? To be fair, the NBA now have tried to take on the guy in stupid qualifications pieces. Before it used to be the top lads in the conference. They now have a play in tournament. So they put a tournament on the back door. So it's not just that you get to play all your games, right? Yeah. The teams that are outside and the teams are on the edge. They now have a tournament that they play off against each other. A special tournament that gets them a place in the knockout stages. Oh, for focusing. Sorry. Before we got to the sparks, because then I was going to go off. I was telling Ashley and Kev lastly on the talking cop show that a bit. So I hate football commentators. I hate football pundits. I hate everything about them, right? But honestly, right? And I'm going to do it again tonight because Canada play in the cup of America tonight. So I'm going to do it again. American slash Canadian commentators. Commentating on Canada slash America could be my new favorite thing. Like, you don't know, America play Bolivia. And my god, your mom was fucking amazing. Like, I was telling them, like, it came to halftime. And he was like, yeah, USA to Bolivia nil here at the AT&T stadium here. And I think it was Dallas. And he goes to cowboy stadium. And he goes, um, forty five minutes gone. Forty five minutes to go. Right? And I was like fucking hell, right? And then I watched fifteen minutes of ads for Ford F-150s and Broncos and all the big cars, all the big things, like trucks, as they call them. And they're not trucks. They're just, you know, jeeps, really. But then it came back on, right? And they were like, here's your commentary team. And the four teams come up and it was like, say, fucking God, feel, Kev. And then there was like, doctors, switching to the gym. And I was like, do you just pull someone out with a fucking HSE here to be a commentator? But I was, I was informed by actually that, no, this guy is, um, I don't know what, he's a doctor, but he's, he's into the football, but he's into the football. But honestly, the commentary was fantastic. Like, they just kept showing pictures of Christian Pulitzer, and saying, nine assists, seven goals in Serie A last year, Serie A. And then they were like, I have team of the year, a similar land. No one had more output than this, man, apart from such and such, right? And there were names in the field in Serie A. And then there's a guy called Pepe, come on, which is just me favorite. And I don't care if people listen last night. I have to tell it again. Because he comes on and goes, here's Pepe now in his hometown, right? Look at the score of goal. He's a forward. He plays for PSV. And he goes, and he goes, um, gets a chance. He goes, ooh, Pepe looking for the goal in his hometown, right? So this went down and on. And he goes, oh, that must be a curse on Pepe in his hometown. And then it comes, and then 20 seconds, then he goes, well, I say hometown. He's actually from Mexico. And I was like, this is amazing. So, um, I'm banging. I hate football commentators. All of them. But this is phenomenal. And look, the Canadians have so much to live up to. I'm watching all of the orders on TSN Network, um, from Canada. And they ask questions like, um, where do you think this game we want to last? And they go, oh, I think it could be midfield or the final turn. And this is fucking brilliant. The only thing I don't like is top of the six and top of the box. Now, hang on. Can I just, there's something that's going to the chat there? And I'm right. As he's mentioned, 3.0, 0.0, 3, 7, 4, 4, 5, 7, right? And scalter Peter said, what's that in Columbus? You've got me, right? Because I'm listening to me. The whole world by England and America operates in Columbus, right? The whole world. Right? Even the Australians and the New Zealanders. Do you remember when the change is the Columbus? The Columbus. So you speak 60, 60 miles an hour on the, on the, on the mountain ways in Ireland, right? And then next to all those signs, we're going to 100, which is the equivalent of 60 kilometers. Yeah. 100 kilometers is the equivalent of 60 miles. And they were like, um, fucking, did you see them? I always, you know, they'll go 100 on the mail. And you're like, yeah, but it's 100 kilometers. It's a much faster. It's a much faster. You know, um, but yeah. So I'll go back to miles tomorrow. No. I'll go with miles. And I'll tell you what this is. I hate that. It's multiplying by 1.6. No, you don't need to. You just, I have to lose. It's kilometers. That's it. And, and the reason for it is, right? A kilometer is a fixed measure. So here's the, here's the thing that's always gotten to me, right? About, about... One thousand meters. Right? It's a fixed measure. Whereas the model system is actually not fixed. And people need to look this up. Because when you start breaking down distance in the idea of miles and yards and all this type of stuff, right? Yeah. None of these distances are real. It's all based upon the gate of a man's walk, right? And this is, I remember looking this up before I was getting really annoyed about this. Because when you get onto the Imperial system, it was all about the gate of the, the King of England, right? So depending on what he was, the distances could change. Yeah. So you could be 20 months or something. Yeah. And then King doids, and he put a new failure into his system. Sadly, the vehicle gets the fucking job. I hear a fucking... Yeah, twenty-five months, right? You know, I'm not having it. So that's what a kilometer is. The old emergency went from 26.2 miles to 48 miles. It was people strilling all over the place. When Danny DeVito became the King of England. Yeah. So that's it. We're doing so. So kilometers, people, the world uses kilometers. I'll tell you something. I'll tell you something. Divounded Brexit. The L-meters are starting to creep in in the L football, isn't it? Well, that's confusing. This comes from the old 24 meters. It was always yards. It's an 18-yard box. It's 12 yards. It's 12 yards. To be fair, that's going to wreck the head of the gala. How many feet are in the yard? The gala's there wouldn't use yards because the soccer lads used yards, right? It's a three feet in the yard. Who knows? The three point three meters. The three point three feet in a meter. I know that. But the yards seems to be... Yeah, so it's... Anyway, look. I don't know. I like the miles thing. And listen, I can live at the kilometers thing. But when it comes to football and sport, I want yards. But then again, when you look at the Olympics, you know, when the trial... Every measurement in the Olympics is in meters. That's when the 100-yard race changes every time you go to the Olympics. They change the length of the track. I hope to man in the 200-yard at the moment. 7-4-3, right. The track is now actually 200 yards. Well, it would have been 200 yards last, but it's only 100 yards this time. Not the Imperium on the head. Metric is a sound. We can all get behind sound because it fits. It's regulatory and it's used all over the world and to your point. But it's got to wreck the guy ahead. It's got to wreck the guy ahead because they've been using meters long before... Long before all the rest of them are because you know why? Because football used the yards, so they couldn't... They don't have boxes in gear. They have parallel-elegrams, right? They have parallel-elegrams. It's like they can't score inside the parallel-elegram because you box and soccer. So this is going to... They're going to be in trouble now. We're going to go back to yards. All the guy that will be in yards as opposed to meters. So four balls of meters now. So there we go. And then the Proclaimers, son. If you change that into kilometers, it wouldn't be... I would walk. 500 miles. 626 kilometers. 887 kilometers. It doesn't quite have the same ring to it, but we have to move the times. What else did you want to talk about? We've gone through our weekend. Are you going to finish on the Olympic/World Games? No. I'll tell you what happened to me. And that's where I was calling the one with the call of this podcast. I was thinking, because that's what happened to me. I was thinking about stuff that you don't see anymore. And this is the part of getting old. I'm glad you mentioned that earlier. Getting old and you stuff you don't see. Like, people scooting on the back of buses are trucks anymore. They're being trucks, right? People are people who are scooting. Scooting is just, you know, the Bintro goes down the road. You're running jump on the back of it. You're going to bleed and jammed up the road. If you're going to the scale or whatever, right? I can't remember the last time someone's hues the dog. I've never seen that. It's ages since I've seen someone who's a dog at someone. And people are going, "What the fuck's hues the dog?" There was always a fellow when you were younger who had a dog. And the dog was a bit of a bollocks. And he goes, "Who's hues to just annoy you?" And the dog goes, "Rah, rah, rah, rah." And then he pull him back on the lead. It's like the Jeep or something. Yeah, yeah. You'd be afraid to walk by your man's calf because that bleeding dog will just clear over that wall and take care of it or whatever. But I was just thinking things that things you don't see anymore. You know, things you don't see enough. Like, here's the red bounty bars. Don't see them around anymore. Well, there's many who can cover on this. But I want to go back to the dog hues and territory because this is where when you said to me, "Yeah, do you still have to threaten you?" You know, get the dog and hues off. Hues off the internet with the dog, right? Now, I also want to point out that you don't see many black Labradorers anymore. For some reason, black Labradorers... Well, now there's all the fighting dogs and everything. Black Labradorers are the most sarcastic dogs known to man. And if Pete was on here, he'd back me up because on our own, back in the day when me and Pete were young for this, there was two black Labradorers, Blackie and Derekie, and both of them were the most psychotic dogs that you could ever come across in your life. They could be pregnant. They could be licking it and the whole lot, right? Next minute and bite a little bit of your head, right? Literally, they were just literally the most dangerous dogs ever got. But yeah, their owners used to hues... Well, here's to think of, and this was what was to think. Well, maybe think. When a dog used to start back and at you, that wasn't with somebody, right? What did you say to the dog? That's what it's to think of. Who's... Who's... Digit! Yeah! I was like... When you said to me, you said, I was like, "That's right. Did you sell hues to dog after..." If you're walking through the estate and you're seeing a dog on its own and it started back and at you, there's two things you can do. Run, which is the worst thing you can do because the dogs change. The dogs things you're playing. Or two, you do this one step towards the dog. You know, this kind of half-lunch, kind of your foot out in front of your body, kind of follows to see if the dog will back off. And the dog backs off, you know, your grand. You just keep walking, you just have the dog to fuck off. But... No, I think that's what I've done. I've probably done... I've probably just fucking told the dog to piss off. But if the dog was really tall... Who's... If the dog was really tall, and I told him that you'd bleep bleep and break it. And you'd be afraid to eat the dog. You'd be afraid of your man. You wouldn't want to walk back. You'd be walking the long way home just because you didn't walk away his gas now. No, no, no. I'm telling you now, black Labradors are the most psychotic dogs. Actually, bread ones are worse. Bread ones are the most dangerous animals that have ever existed. And yet, the gold Labradors are just the biggest... The biggest lumps that just run around and grab you. Do you know what I mean? They're great. They're great. Yeah, I think just because we got bitten so much, it was like... Wasn't all the time. Literally bitten. And Pete will tell you, Pete, when he's on the next time I ask him... Because we were terrified. Particularly Ducky that was down the road. Barbara just had Ducky, and he was literally... He used to come out... They ended up having to keep him in all the time because he was basically a skitzer dog. And he went around just pointing kids all the time. But then, back then, if a dog points a kid nowadays... I think they give the honor of one and down to it. And if it does it again, it gets put down. In fairness, we've heard of a horrific story in Limerick of a woman killed by her own dog, recently. A horrendous fucking story. And I wasn't thinking of the dogs when I was... I wasn't thinking of that story when I was thinking of the dogs. It was actually... I met with my dog all the time, and I got thinking about it. You know, everyone's like... Who's the master of the kids? No, because everyone's like... Everyone's like, "Oh, look!" My wife comes home and goes, "Oh, we are playing with a different new dog today." And he was lovely. And I was kind of gone, "Hey, hey!" He was like... "You know, my dog or bath, are you a dog?" You know what I mean? No, it's not. No, it's not. You know what I mean? You know, that's all fucking deadly stuff. Do you know what I mean? Do you know what I mean? Do you know what I mean? Do you know what I mean? I was laughing as well. You know the way when people have these little Scottish terrios and the Jack Russell's and the Alders type of stuff, right? And they can't figure out why the dog has an aggressive nature, even though it's a small dog, right? Do you never look up the history of what the dog was you? Like for centuries what those dogs were used for. And only in the last 100 years have we decided that these are lovely little house dogs that are friends and the whole that way. Jack Russell's were sent to hunt rats and weasels and ferrets and foxes and everything with that, right? Yeah. They are literally... They're small and tacky. The hunter dogs. Yeah. Maddings, right? Yeah. You know the Scottish terrios and the hoylands and you take them and you put them in the house and you stroke them because they've got lovely long fore and you wonder where the elk didn't snap such a... Because it's designed... It doesn't want... If that wants to be a hunter, like that's what it's nature is telling. I want to be able to... Even though it's a tiny elk, it wants to be able to be a hunter whatever it's going after. I have to understand this. Animals don't just evolve over 10, 20, 20 years. And they'll kind of set about German chapters or German chapters. I don't want any dogs to be honest with you. Going back to the Gulf. Our own books. He played Gulf on Saturday in Kilkenny. All the distance takes on the cars were in meters. I thought they were in yards. So it's hitting every shot short, right? All Gulf courses should be using yards. A fully 100% degree. Because when you get up and you go, what is it a meter? It's 140 meters. No, it is. So you have to add 40 and 54 yards. Yes. But you know, do you know where a massive business that came off the bucket at was? And the laser scopes. Because people were like, 120 meters. Now, 120 meters, 143 yards. You literally take the four or two digits of the three digits and add it to the, into it. So if you have 120 meters, the four or two digits are told in. So you add 30 into one, 20, and that gives you a yardage. But the laser things kind of range for interest. So the business in them is unreal now. Everyone has to have one. And these ones are great. And these ones are deadly indeed. You know, when I, I've been out playing golf with her and they go, see these ones. These ones are used to a Honton. And I'd be like, what? Honton. And they go, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And they go. Arrange finder. You go, yeah. Honton. And they go. But you're just pointing it. Like mine, I just pointed the flag pressable and it tells me that flag is. Have a scope. 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