"The legends are true, we're building power." "The sauce of testing." "Yes!" "The most legendary sauce has arrived, has McDonald's transformed into the anime world of McDonald's!" "The greatest flavors unite in all news, savory chili McDonald's sauce, to make your 10-piece with nuggets, fries, and sprites ultra-powerful!" "Unlock manga comics with every meal and sit down for a new anime short every week, only at McDonald's!" "Spa-bop-bop-bop-bop-bop, go!" "I've participated in McDonald's for limited time while supplies last." Live from our studios in Austin, Texas, this is "Drinkin' Bros. Fate News," with Ross Patterson, Dan Hollerman, Papa G with the Traveler. "How you feel?" "Not good." "Yeah." "The Field Reporter, Hot Bop." "And Delco Dan Sports." "Welcome to "Fake News." Yeah! Welcome to "Drinkin' Bros. Fate News," everybody bringing you the realest. "Fakeest news of the week. Do not adjust your TV and/or handheld device. These shirts we're wearing are loud." "Man, I'm looking at these in Mona. They're bright, dude. We're spring-breaking today." "Spring break starts tomorrow here in Texas. All the schools are out. Tomorrow at noon." "Is that right?" "Yep." "Sending off the kids to California to see Gampy and Gammie out there, and they're going to go to Disney World or Landland." "Yeah, it's Land in California." "Who cares?" "But I'll be here with you. Papa Bear will be here." "I got a Borg on the show today. We're talking about that in Ross Patterson Revolution. Mine's called the Borg Identity." "Do you know what a Borg is? Anthony?" "Siborg." "Close." "No, it's not close. That's what it is." "It stands for Blackout Rage Gallon here. I mixed Liquid IV in it to get a little electrolytes. That's what was recommended by Delco there." "And then I put some Blue Razz Hard AF in here, and it's a fantastic combo." "Again, not recommended by me." "The water part, right?" "No, not the water." "So what would you have just done? Just dump the Liquid IV in there?" "Diesel 153 and Power Raid." "What the fuck is diesel 153?" "What the fuck is diesel 153?" "It's 153 proof." "Why don't I just go Everclear?" "Yeah, Everclear if you're going to do it, man." "So the one that J--" "Everybody's got their own brew, right?" "And I guess maybe it's generational. People used to throw shit into a bathtub or whatever the fuck or jungle juice or whatever." "Yeah." "The one that Jared and I made was absent and Everclear mixed together." "Oof, how'd that turn out?" "We call it the atom bomb." "No matter what you were doing before you started that, your fucking world was coming to an end." "I've never seen anybody take more than two of those shots without blacking out." "So my buddy Brett Neeson--" "I don't know if he listens to show or not, but I talked to him from time to time." "He drank three of them--" "Because that was the challenge. If you could take three back to back, right?" "Mm-hmm." "Which is basically 12 consecutive shots based on ABV, right?" "Correct, yes." "It's like 12 consecutive shots." "That was the challenge. Take three and see if you could survive." "Nobody ever could." "No." "Jeff Taylor, who was on the show before, my buddy--" "Yeah." "--who's our old roommate back in the day." "He was outside having a conversation with the air conditioner." "Thinking he was pissing off the front porch but just pissing right into the air conditioner and blowing it back in his face." "Beautiful." "Brett fucking took three shots." "He was in the barracks so he fucking took the desk and his room put it on top of his bed and went to sleep underneath the desk for some reason." "I'm not sure if he was worried about the Russians or what." "Yeah." "But yeah, that's like--" "I don't want to hear about 153. Unless it's 190 proof or higher, Delco, this is meaningless thing." "No, it's not. It's in a plastic bottle. It's awesome." "Oh, it's all jugged up like pop-off." "It's probably--" "Yeah, that's what I was going to say. Pop-off is in a plastic bottle, too, and it's probably safer that way." "Because after a couple of shots of this stuff, you're going to want to smash the money in the fucking head." "Or you're going to want to smash the bottle, take the shards of glass and slice your own neck." "You're also putting this entire thing into a gallon jug of water and then throwing in the power rate and you're just going to carry it around all day and day drink." "I mean, that's a hunt. What is that?" "That's what we're doing today." "That's a 750 right there. 750 milliliter." "Yeah." "Yeah." "So, just a--" "That's the jug? Were you pulling the whole bottle in there?" "Yeah, you put the whole bottle in there." "There you go. That's a--" "It's a fun day. It's a fun day, friends. If you're out there on spring break, bore get up, put some fucking hard AF in there." "It's surprising how much hard AF sells you can put in this guy." "A 750 is--" "That's a fifth of a gallon, right, a fifth, right? So it's a fifth of that." "Yeah." "So you're diluting it one-fifth. So if it's 153 and then four parts, water, or whatever else." "Mix, mixer, whatever, whatever--" "That's a normal--" "That's a normal mix drink, right?" "That's not terrible. It's just a lot." "Because you go, like, two--" "It's an entire box." "You go two to one on 40 proof, like vodka is two to one, typically, right? Like, it's one ounce of booze and--" "Oh, no, maybe it's four to one, actually." "Do they sell that here, Delco? Because we can actually do this challenge live on air if you want." "I mean, I'm not 21 anymore, so I'm not going to do it." "You're not?" "No." "Okay." "I didn't know, dude, you know." "So it's one--" "It's single life, right?" "It's either two or four to one for like a Tito's and soda." "Okay." "Right, and this is five to one for 153, so it's pretty strong. It's probably double the strength of a double drink." "Mm-hmm." "So it's a double, though, but that's what I drink is doubles." "Yeah, so I think you'd be all right." "I don't know, man. I don't really get the point of this. What's the fucking point?" "It's an easy carry for the day, so if you're just looking to cruise around and kind of get fucked up all day." "I like it. I enjoy it. I enjoy the board." "Do you take this to gas?" "I'm at it all morning." "We take it to Gasparilla for pirate Mardi Gras." "Yeah, what's up, like pirates?" "What's Gasparilla? What is that?" "Pirate Mardi Gras." "Where is it?" "Gasparilla." "It's in January." "Oh, it's dirty, dude." "Isn't it like kind of cold in Tampa still then?" "No." "No." "It's usually beautiful." "It's a rocker today too, man, before we got in and got fired up this morning, was talking about another Renfaire." "So that's his life right there." "Well, he's got a fresh bash of mushrooms. Have you ever been to a Renfaire on mushrooms?" "No." "Dope as fuck." "Is it really?" "Yeah, it's awesome." "Yeah, we're in a camp." "It's like great camping." Usually, all my friends that go to the one over near Houston, they just get fucked up on mushrooms and MDMA the whole time. For like a four day weekend, basically. "It's supposed to get wild at night." "It's like kind of like Burning Man, but everybody's similar, right? Everybody's in weird costumes." "Sure." "There's weird fair, weird food and stuff. There's weird stuff to do." "But without the hassle of being in the middle of the goddamn desert." "I like it, look, the food is always excellent, and there's always a bunch of wenches dressed up in leather." "It's a mini Halloween, like it's an opportunity for women to dress like whores, which is always nice." "Yeah, tits out is always fun, no matter where you are, what you're doing in life." "From our perspective, Dan and I's perspective has the added benefit of a lot of meats on sticks." "Yep." "Right, which is something I enjoy as well." "If you took everything else away from it, the meat on the stick might actually bring me out to the show." "Absolutely, absolutely." "Any gang bangs there?" "Yeah, there's a lot of swinging actually that happens." "Is there really?" "Yeah, allegedly there's a lot of swinging, and I mean you could eat a turkey like while you're having sex." "What would you mind that?" "Like that scene from American Psycho where he's looking at his own bicep in the mirror and fucking." "Yeah." "But this way you could have the other hand with a turkey leg." "Can you imagine that?" "You just got to bring the mirror because there aren't mirrors out there." "Obviously, so if you're going doggy style, then you can eat the turkey leg over her back." "Yeah, and then you can have your fixings or a cup of gravy or something right on her ass." "Yeah, I just don't like, the mirror's not really period accurate, I don't really love that." "Was there not mirrors back then?" "My mercury glass mirror maybe, right?" "Yeah, I mean you need to use, I'll find a mirror for the time period, but I would like you to be accurate to the time period." "In character, yeah, no other way." "Why are you getting hung up on this?" "Just do it right." "Do it right, I respect the process Bob, I get it, go method if you're going to do it." "I feel like Delco's usually the hater and Bob's trying to weasel in on his fucking thing." "I know." "Now Delco finally found something he actually enjoys, Bob's like no." "And he's happy, like this is the first time we ever seen Delco happy." "So this might be Delco's rose butt, this is his origin." "He was a happy guy before he met this cunt over here, and he just sucks all the joy out of him." "Yeah, ever since I got to Austin, it's a weird timeline where the misery started." "Bob's responsible for all this shit." "It sure is too." "Which is why probably why Delco wants to fight Bob's baby." "Yeah, yeah." "Then get back to him." "What's that taking place, so we got Tyson versus Jake Paul, when is Delco versus baby?" "We've changed it, I've actually decided I'm going to train Finn, his second child that he ignores." "Take him under my wing, kind of like Razaagul, and he's going to be my Batman." "You mean his spare child?" "Yeah, his spare child." "And then Finn's going to write a book called "Spare in five years." "I'm going to have Finn fight Rory and beat Rory's ass." "I like that, I like that a lot, what's the age difference there, year, year and a half?" "Sixteen months." "There you go, there you go, could be a fair fight." "So come in 2035?" "Yeah, yeah, let's do 2035." "If you go Russian rules, obviously you can do it right around age eight." "But I think 12 would be a fair fight somewhere in there, you know?" "I like it." "State of the Union is tonight, that's our top story of fake news." "How the fuck is this guy going to do this?" "I'm going to watch." "Yeah, this, I haven't watched the State of the Union in like a long time." "The last one I watched was Trump when Pelosi tore up the shit in the background." "I didn't watch any during the Trump era or Obama, I think I may have watched one during Bush." "No, it was, it actually was Obama when I was deployed." "No, no, that's not right, it was Bush's last one when I was deployed." "That's the last one that I watched." "So, yeah, tonight's Joe Biden set to use the State of the Union address to promote his vision for a second term to a dispirited electorate." "The question whether he's up to the job and to warn that the GOP front-runner Donald Trump would be a dangerous alternative." "Biden's third such address from the House rostrum will be something of a miracle if he's able to pull this off here tonight." "We're all in, I talked a little bit earlier about it, it was a rumor that he could potentially use AI." "I don't think that can happen just because there would be too many people on the floor who are actually filming it." "With cameras and what not to see what he really says here." "Yeah, like I assume there will be, well first of all he's going to get harangued by Republicans the whole time." "My understanding is that they're going to try to fucking, they're going to try to fuck with him a little bit." "Right, to get him off script." "Is that real?" "Yeah." "No shit." "But I think that's a mistake, we'll get into why later, but yeah, AI, no, no way." "Okay." "There's too many people in that room." "That's what I said too, but that's going around the internet right now." "Well that's because people's brains are broken, they think everything is fake now." "Everything's fake, man, it's like yeah, some stuff's fake." "Well look, here's the reason why I was willing to entertain, and if you were Biden and you could have that kind of help, do it." "You know what I'm saying, it's like auto-tune for fucking T-Pain." "If you were able to do it and shift it and go out to the nation, the world actually with this address tonight." "Because let's face it, we're all in, we want to see, we haven't seen him speak more than 14 minutes in close to a year I think." "So how the fuck, because the State of Union address is usually 60 to 90 minutes, how the fuck is he going to be able to do that at this age?" "Just based on what we've seen in the small snippets of interviews he has conducted in the last three months here." "Well, is this going to shake out?" "I don't know about the distance or the material, right, or the duration rather or the material." "They're both problematic for him, so he's going to try to talk about the inflation reduction act, which didn't reduce inflation." "No." "He'll talk about creating jobs that were just jobs that came back after lockdowns, those aren't real, right?" "Yep." "He'll talk about the unemployment rate, which has been four percent, around four percent for longer than it has been in a hundred years." "Mm-hmm." "Right, but that's not real either because it doesn't account for people who have left the job market." "We've talked about this ad nauseam, I don't want to get into it anymore." "My understanding is he's also going to talk about lower drug prices, which has not reached the consumer yet, and also tougher immigration rules." "That's part of his speech." "Now, I don't know how the fuck he's planning on selling that one, right?" "And that's probably where you're going to start hearing the jeering come in, but even as he lies about everything." "Even the leftist media is talking about how everything he says is going to be closely watched, not for the message, but for whether he can actually deliver it in a way that people fucking understand and stuff." "I don't know what they're injecting it." "Whatever, if he comes out and does well, I want what he's on." "Same." "I want it every fucking morning, and I don't care what the side effects are." "Yeah." "Because it's a goddamn miracle that he's able to communicate in any way at this point." "It is, and somebody who talks for a living who has been known to mispronounce things and stumble on words occasionally here occasionally." "It's tough, man. Let alone being fucking 81, 82 years old." "If he's able to get through this clean tonight, yes, inject me with all the things and all the stuff that he's on." "I don't care if it's baby blood, I don't know what the fuck it is, I'll crack that baby right now." "I'll crack open my own infant skull and drink right out of it because I want whatever that is." "And that's why we're all gonna tune in tonight." "Everybody's been talking about this thing for four days now, like it's the goddamn Super Bowl just because we want to see what goes down." "Now, as far as immigration goes, what the fuck could you possibly say about what is happening in America regarding immigration and stuff that you've done to fix it?" "If he starts going the other way with it and saying, well, the Republicans won't pass this spending bill for the border, it's because Ukraine and Israel's in that fucking bill." "Well, that's half of why." "The other half is because it codifies into law two and a half million illegals coming across the border every year." "Right." "Right, which we know they try to pass it off as humanitarian, like, oh, we're doing the best we can with the situation we have, but we'll get to this other story later where the Biden administration is now admitted." "The administration is now admitted to flying people in the middle of the night." "300,000 people." "320,000, yeah, and they said it's 'cause, oh, we did it to alleviate some of the stress at the border." "That's like, what the fuck? I'm sorry, what the hell are you talking about? This isn't a fucking, this isn't clear or TSA pre-check, they're still criminals." "Yeah, yeah." "You're just aiding and abetting criminals now. You didn't improve the situation. All you did is let more people get away with their crime, you stupid fuck." "Anyways, we'll get to that later." "When, ask about this, the right definitely hasn't, they haven't been talking about it so much, but it is behind the scenes, the opinion of most people that they're going to try to razz him a little bit to get him off." "His talking points and shit get him off the teleprompter." "White House aides conversely are saying that he's aiming to prove that the mental cognitive, or the cognitive health doubt is wrong by flashing his combative side and trying to needle Republicans on certain positions and stuff like that." "That talk a little shit." "Their position is he's going to try to be aggressive on abortion and tax policy and health care, which he hasn't done shit for health care, or tax policy, frankly." "The only thing he's done is cost us more money, right? It's part of his campaign year effort, they say, to show that he's actually okay mentally. And he's rolling out this campaign at the State of the Union." "It's a big gamble. It's a big risk. When you won't even sit down and do a Super Bowl interview, this is a massive risk tonight, or does he keep it short? Is this going to be the shortest state of the Union in the history of the President?" "Bob, do we know what the longest and shortest states of the Union have been?" "I want to say the longest was like 98 minutes, I think. Shortest, I want to say 60." "I imagine if you've seen that the shortest state of the Union address was 27 minutes." "Who did that?" "Well, I think that was during a time of warning, it was outside, right, or something?" "Was that the guy who died 30 days later?" "I don't think that was the state of the Union that he died." "Oh no, that was his inauguration." "Yeah." "Was that McKinley?" "Yeah, not McKinley." "Yeah, I think I know this one." "I mean, pre-mass media, I don't know why you would..." "No needs, no needs to, right, if you're just standing out inside of-" "William Henry Harrison, that was the one." "Okay." "He's like, "Oh, I'm tough, I'm going out without a jacket on." "Dad." "Dum ass." "Anyways, we'll see how it goes, I don't know if he's going to try to keep it short or not." "I'm not expecting much outside of like, a mumbling diatribe then interrupted by jeers from Republicans and then him responding like Clint Eastwood and Gran Torino." "Ah, fucking Asians, fuck you." "I used to stack, what did you say?" "I used to stack gooks like you 10 feet tall." "Sure did." "That's offensive." "To who?" "Gooks, I guess, I don't know." "I don't even know who that's even in reference to you, to be honest." "Asians." "We set it in the military and it meant guys other than our killers." "No shit." "Yeah." "Okay." "But that's probably not right." "That's why I've been saying it all these years." "Well, again, the Biden team expects repubes to heckle them. So my guess is on the teleprompter after they expect the heckles to come in, kind of like a comedy set. They have pre-written retorts to Republicans or something like that." You know what I mean? "The teleprompter-wise, that would be really difficult. Even for like a skilled actor. So I wouldn't recommend it if I'm here." You know what I mean? Like if he says- "No, I understand." If he has talking points, we've done X, Y, and Z on immigration. Or the Republicans are blocking us on immigration. There'll be a pause in there. "Yup." Wait for them to respond and then he's got a retort. Sure. If I was his speechwriter, that's what I would be doing. And if I'm Republicans, I'm anticipating that. Which means I just don't heckle. And wait to see if he blirts him out without being prompted. You know what I mean? To make it obvious what he's doing. It's all chess in these games. Now, the problem is there's only one microphone, right? Yes. And then afterwards, there's all the responses from whomever, right? But depending on the cable network that you're watching, or the news, the broadcast news network you're watching, you may not see the Republican response. Like MSNBC has routinely said things like, "Oh, we're not in the interest of being fair and accurate. We're not going to share this because all he does is lie all the time." It's like, "No, you're just propagandizing. You stupid bitch." It happened the other night, too, during Super Tuesday. So I flipped around throughout all the networks to watch the coverage. When I got to Rachel Maddow, which I saved for last, right during Trump's speech at Marlago after he crushed Nikki Haley and knocked her out of the race. Is that what happened? Yes. That's exactly what happens. I was thinking about buying her tour bus because not a lot of miles. Gently used. Well, the exterior and the wheels were gently used. The bed and the back, though. There's dents in the headboard from old headboard Haley just getting plowed by dudes the whole time. Because her husband's deployed right now, and as we know from his history, that's when she gets fucked by random dudes. Sure. What are you going to do? Yeah, but if I'm homeboy tonight, I try to stick to the script, get in and out of there, just prove that you're alive and could potentially do this. The interesting part will be whether or not he's able to get through it tonight. And if he is, does he do debates against Trump and how is that going to work out? All of it is unbelievably fascinating because we've never had somebody this old give a state of the union address before. So I'm really curious to see what goes down and I've got the popcorn ready. I can't wait, but as far as like Maddow in them is concerned, when they cut away from Trump in that Super Tuesday, they just said. We as a I am disappointed in the network that they want to show this. So it was apparently a network decision and not hers. And when we're just broadcasting, we have responsibility to broadcast people who are telling lies or lie after lie or whatever the exact phrasing was. That's what we're going to see tonight, though, on live television. Because let's face it, he's not going to say that there's an immigration crisis. Or if he does, he's going to blame on Republicans for not funding that fucking bill. And he's not going to take any of the blame for inflation. He's not going to take any of the blame for the economy or housing prices or groceries or any of that stuff. So I don't know what we're going to see tonight. I think the Democrats are just fingers crossed that he can get through it without stumbling. Republicans are obviously hoping that he goes way off the fucking rails here and can't complete it. When he does finish, though, who's going to help him off stage? Because that's been an issue. Usually goes far right or far left, looking for somebody. To my knowledge, last time I watched, the VP usually sits behind him on like a fucking a higher up thing. Yeah. And he's going to run down. The VP and the speaker are behind him. Right. So unless she's going to run down Kamala and help him out, I'm curious to see that as well. Well, I'm kind of hoping it's Uncle Dijon. Do you know who that is? I don't know who that is. Bob, can you get on Instagram really quickly and go to uncle.dijon, spelled the way you think? Like the mustard? Yeah, he's one of our friends. You've seen him. He's Jared's buddy from Canada that does those crazy fucking quick cut animal videos and shit. Oh, yeah. So yeah, this basically, let's see, hold on, scroll down a little bit. Let me see which one's funny. I know Uncle Dijon. Fuck. There's one. There's so many. One he posted, no go, go up. It's recent. It's one that I've, let's see. Butterworth. I think it's saving. Oh no, it's one where he plays tennis with an elephant. Yeah, there it is. Elephant tennis. Play that one. This is, this is how I expected it all. Excuse me, I'm trying to beat this elephant for ages of tennis. You'd be surprised if good he is a tennis. I got refluxes like a cat. Sorry about my tennis noises. Yes, in your face, Dumbo. Yes, I'm finally good at tennis. Anyway, that's enough stimulation. I'm going for a nap. So I'm hoping to tend. It could be. And it goes something like that. That would be really funny to me. It'd be great. But I don't think that's what will happen. I don't know to be honest. Maybe Jill will stand on the fucking sidelines waiting to catch him or secret service or somebody. I mean, pay attention. My book, you should have this on their site to gamble on by the way. But what kind of shoes is he wearing coming off stage? Do you know what I mean? Oh, why do you think they're sneakers or something like that? They'll be sneakers. Yeah, like fucking a new balance or some shit like that. Some sketch or shape us? Yeah. But they'll be dark. So you can't tell. Of course. But he's not wearing like real dress if he falls down on the way in or out. Yeah. That's pretty much the end of the campaign. It sure is. In my opinion. Same. If anything like that happens or if he like it was brain goes blank or something like that, I think that's pretty much the end. Or if he dies during the actual speech itself, the campaign's over. So we'll see. A disgruntled Lanky man here in the chat said never forget Joe Biden shit his pants in front of the Pope and crop dusted the duchess of Cornwall. That's right. Yeah. He could crop dust the sentence tonight. We'll see. Both of those are actually in line with tradition. If you are a Catholic, you should defecate in front of the Pope to show your respect to fear God and obviously all Americans should fart on British royalty. Does God make you want to shit your pants out of fear? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. It's like coffee. If you drink them in the morning, then you're going to have to shit. Mm. Yeah. I think I'm not a religious scholar. Actually, I am. Well, yeah. You've got a theology degree. Yeah. I should probably. You kind of are there. Ooh, the bigger Mac is coming back to J&L barbecue. Really? I just saw. We got a hard day of Seltzer there. J&L barbecue. So shout out to J&L barbecue. I'm going to go get one of those. Finest in the biz down there in Austin, Texas. Next up, Congress is robbing us blinds, huge shock, voters in California went to the polls this week for a primary election. It's the first step towards picking a permanent replacement for the late great Senator Diane Feinstein. All right. P to that lady. You want to you want to give her that angel noise, please? Thank you. Thank you. died six months ago, 92 years old. She died six months ago and yet is it her name is attached to 256 different earmarks included in this omnibus budget bill. 256 times her name appears in support of robbing the taxpayers. So from beyond the grave, this piece of shit is still robbing people. It's crazy, isn't it? Those port projects, those 256 that have her name on it, $1.1 billion and it's nonsense. I mean, it's all kinds of stupid shit. There's 12 additional appropriations bills inside of this goddamn omnibus bill. In addition to the or that make up the discretionary portion, all told there are more than 6,000 earmarks in the bill, 6,000 separate times in this omnibus government funding bill that Congress and Senate went into the fucking bill and said, you know what? My city needs a billion. My city needs a fucking billion, 12.7 billion additional dollars in these according to Mike Lee from Utah, who's a repubed. A lot of the earmarks are typical shit, but almost all of them should be funded by local state governments and there are already federal grants for a lot of these that are earmarked to fucking do this shit. But stupid shit, like new sewer systems, new runways for their airports, all kinds of highway projects, like no, the state pays for that. Fucking Texas better not be taking any of this shit because our property taxes are supposed to be paying for that. And if we're getting this money from the government too, I feel like I'm getting double tax a little bit. Sure are. It's, look, it's tougher because this is California, obviously, and California's got their own set of very, very special taxes, which I paid for many, many years there that I was less than. Actually, I'm still paying them on residuals, by the way, because it's where you worked. And some of those fucking movie checks that keep coming in, god damn, dude, I'm losing like 43% on those fucking things, just because it's going back to the state of California for what? Who knows? Some of these are like really weird though, like so Tammy Baldwin that, uh, uh, Lesbo from Wisconsin, $1.4 million earmarked for a solar energy project in Wisconsin, Wisconsin is the worst place in the world to put solar panels. It's also not part of California, right? Nine month. This is not a California bill. Okay. This is an omnibus government's bill. It's a conicotic, uh, uh, like the last place on earth, you would put fucking solar panels is Wisconsin. It's great. I mean, that's 320 days out of the year. Yeah. It's fucking retarded. Uh, let's see. There's a three and a half million dollar earmarked by Debbie Stabenow Stabenow. Stabenow. So we are out of Michigan for, for the quote parade company, which runs Detroit's annual Thanksgiving Thanksgiving parade. So federal taxes are going to pay for Detroit's annual Thanksgiving parade, three and a half million dollars. Worth it. Um, worth it. Two and a half million dollars that will help build a new kayaking facility in Franklin, New Hampshire, uh, courtesy of Jean, she, uh, she, she, as well as 2.7 million line item to help build a bike park in white sulfur Springs, West Virginia, a town with a population of less than 2,300 people. So they're building a bike lane for two, 2.7 million dollars in a town that has less than 3000 people. Great. Great. Uh, for that amount of money, you could buy every resident a $1,200 bike. Perfect. Let's do it. I say we do it. I say we do it. Um, the, the, now here's my pushback on this is, uh, the Thanksgiving day parade. When you see Snoopy in Woodstock flying over your head, uh, on Turkey day, that's worth every fucking penny there for every small boy and family and girl out there. It's an, it's an amazing feeling and the people of Detroit need that. No, they don't know. They do. No, the people of Detroit need to move this Detroit fucking sucks. Um, so there's a, there's a bunch of repubes in here to Lindsey Graham, lady G, um, what's lady G asking for? He's got eight earmarks, uh, action for eight of these things. Damn it, dude. For $33 million for shit that most people will never use like a new trail at coastal Carolina university. Maybe the university should pay for it. Ah, yeah. Uh, no, not tough, uh, an ROTC facility for the university of South Carolina again, pay for it. You're fucking sell the troops. No. It's the troops. No, we're building up America. Dozens of earmarks by Lisa Murkowski from Alaska, uh, a $4 million grant for Alaska King crab enhancement project. Yes. Do they? Is this like a rocky montage where they're shooting steroids into the king crabs and he's punching fucking meat and shit. What the fuck does this mean? Oh, brothers. So those Alaskan king crabs are my fav, uh, Joe's, uh, is in particular in Vegas. You and I have been there many times, friend. That's where they're coming from. If that, if that's what the money's for so I can have better crab legs out in public, I'm all in for that, but I need, I need some explanation. It's a business charge more. The end. Nope. The end. And by the way, during the tea party era from 2010 to 2012, this earmark omnibus thing was made illegal, right? And then the Democratic Congress, I think three sessions later, oh, no, I'm sorry. It was in 2021. So six sessions later, uh, made it legal again. And then the Republicans within that same session started using it as well, right? We're back to, we're back to the Bush era Republicans, basically, who would just like say they're conservative but spend all of our fucking money. Yeah. That's, that's where we are now. And it isn't the Democrats to everybody. Everybody's doing this shit. Well, all politicians are conscious. Yeah. It's because, you know, I'm looking through this list here and you're right, it is Republicans and Democrats alike here. And it seems like as we're reading through this, everybody's got their own interests in whatever bullshit project it is. But then on the other side of that is, you know, who pledged money to their fucking campaigns, who gave them a stock tip, who, you know what I'm saying? Like, uh, I think that's the biggest deal in this because the, the recent number that I saw, um, take this Nancy Pelosi shit, man. Did you see the numbers on, on the stock streams name from, uh, Navidia in the last, uh, no, it's three weeks. Um, she's made $3.5 million in the last three weeks off in an investment there. You're getting tips from somewhere and all this other shit. I'm imagining this, these little tit for tats projects and bullshit is like, Hey man, I got a friend who does this. I get a friend who does this. Cool man. How can you help me? Well, I need this. All right. Great. All right. I'll give you the fucking money for it. But, uh, this is crazy. Um, and how are we allowing 6,000 earmarks in one fucking bill? Who could read that? Uh, well, Grok, actually. So Elon Musk announced this week that he's working on his AI company, Grok, uh, they're working on prompts and software that would read and summarize the bill in minutes. No shit. So that Congress isn't allowed to sneak shit through. That would be great. And, uh, so he might be dead by the end of the week, to be honest, because they don't want, they definitely don't want that. I mean, it's, it's a fucking three million page bill and you have less than 24 hours to read it. Mm hmm. Basically is how they typically do this shit. Right. Um, but there's all, I don't think it's going to pass to be honest because there's all kinds of stuff in it, uh, that the, the left is sour on as well. So it, um, I'm sure listeners of the show will remember this from a couple of years ago, but the VA, uh, pass this regulation where they could deem somebody incompetent, right? To take care of themselves for one reason or another. And the, I think the purpose of it was so they could get benefits from the VA and get help and shit like that, but the, the federal fallout from that was that if the VA deems you incompetent, now under certain federal laws, you can have your guns removed. So like let's say, for example, you have financial troubles, you file for bankruptcy and you need financial help. The VA VA, uh, administrative employee can deem you incompetent as an adult, right? And the federal government can come take your guns away legally because you had financial trouble. Okay. And, and the left wants to keep that in. Oh, Jesus Christ. And this omnibus bill takes it out, right? So I don't know what's going to pass, to be honest. It's just like a, it's concrete. Know that if it, if it does, and I have to speak for you on your behalf, um, I'll let them know what you, what you really think. Okay. You won't have to speak on my bad. I will. Hello. Cause let's, let's say you stroke out and you're in a fucking wheelchair, right? Know this. If I stroke out and I'm on a wheelchair, walk up behind me and put a bullet through my brain. I don't want to be alive for that. Fuck that. It's not that I want to be behind you talking for you, but I want to talk in like a, and like a simple, fucked up voice and I was like, what Dan wants to do is, um, he wants to go to the things, giving day created, Detroit, how do we find it? If I'll tell you what I'll do, you're going to be forced to hear it all day long? No, I'm fine with that. I'll, I'll tell you, I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll put it in my will that my last will and testimony must be read in public in that voice. Okay. And then yeah, but I'm going to put some weird shit in there. So you're going to get canceled afterwards, so make sure you've got your affairs in order. We still on air now. I mean, that's a, it's a shock every day that we are. So that's true. Good for us. Uh, the last meal and testament are dandy, dandy, hollywood, um, buckle up ladies and pull out your tampons. It's going to get crazy today. I think I'm, I'm going to part of the preamble. I'm going to say exactly how many racial slurs are inside that document. What do you, what's your, what's your over under 147? Uh, I was going to go 170 actually 170. And you know, if you can identify them all, you get 10% of my stuff. Okay. Also seems like a wasted opportunity, not using you as a Roland billboard for these colors. Don't run shirt. Yeah. That's a good point too. Yeah. Sell some t-shirts after. Did you see the guy yesterday? Yeah. These are the best. We should pop this up on screen. Uh, yeah. Just go up, pull up Ross's Twitter right quick. I think you posted it on there, didn't you? Uh, what was it on? It was on my, um, uh, oh yeah, I was on a drink about Twitter, but, uh, I was also on my Instagram feed last night. We got, we've been getting a ton of handicap listeners here who have, uh, who've posted it. Bob, I can also text it to you here. Oh, you got it. Okay. Great. So this guy's got no legs, no hands, nothing, dude. Yeah. Um, and we got several other poses of him. Look at how fucking happy he is. One, two, we got poses of him laying down on the ground. So there's like poses like this and like all over the house and stuff, uh, him and his wife, uh, have had a really good time with it. I've, there's been a huge hit with the, with a handicap community community. And uh, I feel like we have done some good in the world on this show. So like I don't want to hear your negativity. At that point he should be, you should commit and go full nugget. You think so? Just put a fucking, uh, handle on his back. Yeah. You can wear him like a backpack. Yeah. Yeah. Cut off those limbs. Oh, the rest. There are no legs. He's still got usable shit though. He's got nubs. He could pick stuff up with those nubs. I just want full nugget. Not only that, but if somebody breaks in the house, that fucking hammer fist dude. Oh yeah. He's not breaking any knuckles because there are none. Dude, I, I heard a story about Mary Dagg who is in range 15. Um, she's got no arms and legs and, you know, I think it's ends right here. So it's right around the elbow. I heard she beat the fucking Christ out of some girl, like a normal fucking girl at a bar. And, uh, that sounds about right now. Yeah, dude. So I, I wouldn't fuck with this guy for sure. For sure. Um, but hopefully he's sleeping in comfort on a ghost bed from ghost bed.com forward slash drinking broke, pull up the website, Bob. They did a huge product refresh over there, beautiful mattresses made in the USA. Now 50% off everything in the stores, 50% off with the promo code, drinking bros at checkout there, acts out of that for me, uh, all these exclusive deals for our listeners there. These mattresses last for fucking ever to do, um, gigantic fan of these guys, uh, scroll down. Bob, I believe they got the RV mattresses as well. The adjustable bases are 50% off. Look at that rev up your rig. Whoever took that photo, good job over at ghost bed there, 50% off. Look at that, dude. Joel. That's what Joel could have. We just don't get it for him, uh, cause he doesn't deserve it. Let's face it. He doesn't deserve it. Okay. Not yet, Joel. All right. When crime corner starts doing well, maybe we'll talk, but, uh, you know, that's going to launch in a couple of weeks. We're going to postpone the bed for you in the RV there for some time. He's also renting out that RV for $50, uh, but right now the sheets, the pillows, the adjustable bases, the mattresses, everything in the entire store, um, the weighted blankets, all of it is 50% off over there. They got a new line with Venus Williams, uh, Hall of Famer in, uh, in tennis there. So they're doing huge things over at ghost bed.com forward slash drinking bros and it checkouts. Uh, you're still going to see that three year page ago program. No interest as long as they have decent credit over there, stretch it out over three years. I know I'm watching the state of the union. This fucking thing tonight's I've got the adjustable base. I got all the pills. I just bought brand new pillows at Christmas too, uh, huge fan of their company and they're back better than ever. Go sped.com forward slash drinking bros, promo code drinking bros gets you 50% off everything in the entire store. Next up, we got a sexual eclipse. Ooh, yeah, fucking eclipse for me, baby. Oh, oh shit, I'm eclipsing so fucking hard right now. Sorry. It's mandatory. I look, we all know how I do with eclipses. This also mostly has to do with animals. Oh, does it? So you may want to read the story first before you. Oh, I'll put my penis inside an animal. I, a couple listeners just walked in full of shock back there, but, uh, sorry, you know what you walked in on kids. Next month's total solar eclipse is expected to confuse the hell out of animals and create some bizarre behaviors. The scientists are, uh, staking out zoos and asking people to take notes on their pets for data. It's a bunch of fucking perverts, man. Is that what it is? These scientists. Yeah. So during the last total eclipse in, uh, 2017, flamingos encircled their babies to protect them, which is weird, right? Giraffes, gout around their enclosure, huge flocks, birds abandoned their flights to roost and trees and even ancient Galapagos tortoises started fucking again, which, you know, what has been a problem that that species almost died out until I think one of them bred like fucking 180 babies or some shit like that or with 180, I don't know what it was. Anyways, um, animals simply don't know what to do with eclipses because, uh, the sky phenomenons are not something their biology is adapted for says Andrew Farnsworth, a visiting scientist at the Cornell University Lab of Ornithology, he was 143 weather radar stations to study different types of birds in 2017. Um, not sure if he's related to Hubert Farnsworth from, uh, Futurama eclipses aren't common, but they're not rare and we humans can plan for them, uh, but short lived animals that may not be tracking astronomy with math, it's pretty unexpected. So an animal that doesn't have, like an eclipse happens maybe every six to 10 years or something like that. Yeah. Some animals don't have a life span that's shorter than that. So their biology wouldn't account for that sort of thing. Right. Um, now this up total are upcoming total eclipse of the heart will pass over North America on April 8th. Set your calendars for April. I will. I will. And then, uh, goes north, like forms a north easterly diagonal line stretching from Texas all the way to Maine and New Brunswick, Canada. So North East, Canada. Now, Ross, you know the best news about this eclipse. What's that? Uh, your kids aren't going to have school that day. Why? Because it apparently is coming right over fucking drip. Mm hmm. And they think it gives me a lot of traffic from people trying to see or whatever. So they're going to cancel school that day for that school district. Fuck yeah, dude. Look at it. Pull up a Trump during the last eclipse. That was my favorite. Cause I did the same thing. You're supposed to stare right into it. Right. That's what I did. That's what Trump did. And it makes this more powerful humans. So don't buy into the hype that you need glasses for an eclipse. You don't stare right into that fucking, I'm going to look through my telescope right out of it. I don't give a fuck. Yeah. There you go. Or my night vision. Look at this, dude. Look at this idiot. I did the same thing. I love it. No, it's to show dominance over the eclipse. And that's what you want out of a president dominance over the eclipse. Cool. Can you go blind? Yeah. I've heard that rumor. Fuck you. Guess who is 2020 vision right now? Trump, dude. And that's the least, that's the least of our concern because Adam Hearthstone rose professor of comparative anatomy, which what the fuck a comparative anatomy, what's he look at two different dicks? Yeah. You got to that. At North Carolina State University in Raleigh, and dozens of other observers study 12 exhibits at the Riverbank Zoo in Columbia, South Carolina during the 2017 eclipse. He says, I thought it was going to be nonsense. I didn't think the animals are going to be affected at all. But during the 150 or so seconds that the zoo was engulfed in total darkness, nearly all the animals studied changed their behaviors except for the bears who didn't give a fuck. No, shares. Bears couldn't have care, non plus actually was the phrase they use. They couldn't have care less. Now, a lot of animals, uh, bonobo apes, which are, uh, we share a common ancestor with, they get super fucking stressed out because of it. And their way of dealing with stress is just to fucking fuck. They do gang rape, gang rape mostly. They fuck for everything though. Yeah. They'll dispute. They find new food. They fuck. It's the one Rogan talked about back in the day where they introduced currency to them and they immediately started exchanging it for sex. Really? That particular brand of Abe. They're still doing that to this day. So like, there's a lot of, uh, scientists are saying that you should observe your pets at home as well to see if they act weird. So I'm definitely going to do that. All right. I'm going to take them out in it. I want to put them outside. Yeah. Yeah. And see what happens. Unless we're recording that day. I mean, I don't know what we're going to be doing. What it would say is April 8th, April 8th. It's a school day. So yeah, we'll be here. What day of the week, uh, if we pointer our camera at the, at the eclipse, what would happen to it? Uh, it'll take a picture of it. All right. Well, I mean, if we filmed it though, can we just film the eclipse live with the eclipse? Yeah. Yeah. You think so? Yeah. Okay. That's what your, those little glasses you used to look at it. Yeah. It's basically a, a, a root event, a reversion of a camera. So I guess what, is Joel back there? Yeah. Uh, in the back or is he recording right now? He's recording one stuff. Oh, gotcha. Gotcha. Gotcha. Okay. Um, I think we could get a camera outside through the double doors over there. Point it out the sky and then it's kind of cut back and forth, right? No, we don't have HDMI cables that long. We'll get one. No, they, they're not reliable. Stop Delco. Stop hating. Stop hating. On the eclipse. We did it for the fucking Christmas party. Why do you hate on the eclipse? We had a cable that went to the door. We don't have a cable that can go outside. Yeah. We'll buy the cable for the eclipse. No, there's just no HDMI cables that are reliable over 25 feet. The eclipse isn't reliable either, Delco, but we're going to do it for the people. We can record it early and then just add it. We're not pre-recording in eclipse. We, fuck it. We do it live. We do the eclipse live, all right? People love a good eclipse. The last time we had one was one of my favorite days. I'll never forget it. I will never forget where I was during that eclipse. I was on Carolina Beach, dude. I was out in my driveway staring right at it like Trump, dude, dominating that mother fucking eclipse, dude. I want it live on air and I don't give a shit what we have to do for it, okay? I'll wrap my whole goddamn face and body and tin foil. I feel like a 50 foot HDMI cable would do the trick, right? Yeah. Yeah, but again, not reliable over 25 feet. Yeah, yeah, sure, but it'll be reliable enough. Yeah, we're good enough, Delco, Jesus Christ. Why? It doesn't have to be perfect. God damn you, man. It's nuts. It's, I almost feel like the day you die, it should just be in a Delco statement of he's dead. Another new scene realistic, dude. No, just looking out for the company. Damn it, dude. That's a fucking $25 cord. I don't care. I need to get eclipsed on all over my face and chest and I can't do that unless we have a camera pointed at it because I'm going to be in a dark studio, all right? We can film from outside. Fuck. We plug it in, we go live with the eclipse, all right? Son of a bitch, man. There's some people in this world, Dan, that just hate eclipses and fun. I might play. That's the guy right there. You know, I'm, I've been thinking about this. I'll put my dogs next to the window and I'll point my, my ring camera at it and I'll just leave it live on my phone that whole time because it record, whenever you leave it live, it records the whole time so then I can monitor them from here. Cut back and forth. Yeah. Yeah. And see if they start like fucking worship in the devil or pound it off. Yeah. What do you think? I probably pound it off. I think all the, in my house, I remember all the forks and spoons flying out of the drawer and, and sticking right to the fucking wall. I don't think that happened. Yep. That was the eclipse. No, that's the eclipse. That's what an eclipse is. It's very similar to the movie powder, guys. I hate to break it to you. Once you stare at an eclipse, boom, all the metal objects fly out everywhere and stick through the walls and all that other shit. It's true. And like, it's definitely like when during an eclipse, that is, I learn the hard way, the worst time to cover your nut sack and peanut butter. Yep. Oh my God. My dogs were just going bananas on me. No, dude. I wasn't fucking eclipse, dude. The worst time? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Don't do during eclipse. Don't do during eclipse. Or the, or the best time. Yeah. Have you seen these like, apparently, I think it was in Oklahoma, these, these like elementary schools have been having these events where kids lick peanut butter off the armpits and feet. High school. I watched that. Yeah. Teachers. What the fuck is that shit? Yeah. It's just kind of fundraising, dude. It's a fun fundraising event. How much do I pay to have that not happen? Is it, is that what this is? Not sure. Bob, pull it up on the internet. I just saw the latest one. So this happened twice in the last week here. Yeah. Well, two people who got caught in the last week, it's probably happened in war. I don't think it's caught. I just, I mean, they're, they're out. It looked like they were in a high school gym and they were sucking peanut butter off of, there you go. That's it. How old are these people? Not not. This is from 2015. Yeah. Yeah. This is an old one. There's, there's ones more recently. Oh my God. That's a teacher and these fucking high school kids are sucking peanut butter off of their feet. Well, look, what class is it? And then armpits. Christ. In front of an entire school. This is assembly or competition. What is this? I bet it's like, I bet it's like one of those like spirit weeks where they, Edmond Memorial High School. Yeah. That's a lot of spirit. Yeah. This stuff is supposed to happen in your frat, not in your high school teachers, this, but this would get a fraternity kicked off campus. Yeah, probably. Yeah. I think you, I think you're fine. I think these kids are doing a fun thing there. What's that video there? Oh, Jesus Christ. They're really going all in. Yeah. That's it. That's the one I saw. So look at this one. Oh. God damn. Who would even think to do this? It's because the person's fat that it grows to me out. With some fat retard. I just, what's the prize? Life. And why is it that only Russian state television is covering us? I know. It lives up tic-tac at it too. I know, but that's not a real media outlet. RT is the one that fucking posted this. She just found it. I think she is a media outlet at this point. Is it a woman? Warning disturbing images. Disturbing images. You don't say. Is it disturbing because she's fat? It doesn't help. It doesn't help. You know what I'm saying? Right? I just want to blame the state of Oklahoma more than anything right now. That state is fucking pointless. No one should go or live there. Yeah, that's true. Or we should fucking, I know that it technically is part of the United States, but I feel like we should annex it somehow because it doesn't operate like a real state. Or just move it into Texas, just going to slide it on over. Yeah. Get rid of that rivalry altogether. Because it's not a rivalry. Oklahoma's number one. Anything. Ah, they went last year. No, no, no. I'm not talking about schools. I'm not talking about schools. I don't care about that shit. That state is fucking useless. There's a lot of good land there though. It's getting taken over by China right now, believe it or not, in the cartels. So everywhere you see weed get legalized, the cartels move into that state and fund all the jerk-offs that are running all the weed companies. I know a couple of them. Yeah. And they were like, yeah, fucking, this one group specifically. They got the ownership group, went from Vegas to Oklahoma, then Missouri, and now they're fucking off to like Iowa or some shit. They just keep packing up and moving. No, we sold the company. We're moving to start somewhere else. Like, no, you're on the run, dude, because you're using fucking cartel money to finance your shit. Sorry. Yeah, Oklahoma sucks is the point of all that. But it's good. It's good land. So we got it. We should. I think we should as Texas annex that land and just make it a theme park. And the theme is crystal methamphetamine. They are building a gigantic $2.8 million theme park there, as we speak, by the way. $2.8 billion, you mean? Not a million. I'm sorry. A billion with a B. It's called the Great American theme park. I'm not kidding either. In Oklahoma. I'd go to that. Yeah. We chatted with him. I chatted with him the other day about Seltzer. Anyways, April 8, keep an eye on your pets to see if they do weird sex shit. And if they, if you want to get ready for it, for the sex shit with animals, you can go to Adam and Eve dot com. Sure can, dude. Bob, pull up Adam and Eve dot com here. I don't know what your favorite is this week, but look, let's face it. Everybody's got their own kink. And we don't kink shame on the show, never have, never will, obviously. We're here to actually provide you help for those kinks. I do think you should try your best not to have sex with your animals. Try your best. There's a lot of laughter in the back. Try your best is all we can hope for here. I'm setting the bar as low as I can. Yeah. Same as in Patterson. I'm not your fucking dad. So I can't keep an eye on you all the time. But Adam and Eve dot com will hope you hopefully help you fulfill some of your sexual kinks here. So you're not fucking your cat or dog 50% off any item in the entire store over there. Plus free shipping with the promo code drinking bros. That looks like a fun game, Bob. Is that called fondle? It's fondle. Oh shit. For ages seven and up. Have yourself a game night. Is it say seven? No, no. Thank God. Dude. I was like, fuck me, fuck me. Oh, come on. Tell us about fondle, Bob over at Adam and Eve dot com. Fun glasses. Fondle's a great game. It's what you do. It's basically like twister, but with a, you know, a fucking twist. You roll or I'm sorry, you spin the little thing and you know, maybe you fondle a bum or a thigh or a face, a nipple. There's different. Yeah, there's different things you stand on. Up to four players. Yeah. Up to four players. That's fun. So you can swing with the couple in your neighborhood that you've always had your eye on. My uncle called it. Fondle. Just to try to, you know, church it up a bit. Yeah. So I wouldn't call the cops. Exactly. Exactly. What's the description of that board game there and the, and the fine print? Feeling a little touchy in a good way, then it's time to get your fondle on to the fondle, fruity hands on game. Let's two, three or four players get close, get handsy and have a wicked good time. I'm in. So it's twister, but for touching genitals. Yeah. I'll play that. Yeah. Yeah. Just a, but if you see somebody, if you go to someone's house, right, like a nice young couple invites you over to their home for dinner, we're going to have dinner and drinks, maybe watch a movie tonight and you see this on their shelf, just know that they're going to try to fuck you, right? Because that's the whole, that's the only reason to have this, which, you know, I support that. So do I. I would like to walk out with that board game and just in a, like a clown voice, just be like, who wants to play fondle with this fucking shirt on? Oh, be a dream, but there's plenty of dildos, vibrators, butt plugs, sibby, sibby and sex dolls, the everything you can think of just asses you can fuck or just pussies you can fuck. Anything you can think of to put inside of yourself. Yep, or to put yourself inside of basically. They got it. Yeah. And look, I think I should be noted for all the veterans listening right now, um, look, if your girl runs out on you with a Jodi, I think that's your fault at this point, because you didn't buy a clone a Willie kit from Adam and Eve and leave your wiener behind with your loved one. Wow. Can you do that? Can you put your dick in a box and have a shape and hold it? Leave no wiener behind is what they say. In the military. Yeah. What do you stick your dick in there? What is that? Uh, look, you turn, you can turn your boner into a vibrating dildo. It's essentially like you make a moldy your dick. Oh, that's great. Like you press it into something probably and then send it off and look, they even use like a weird shape oblong wiener. Yeah. To show you that it's real. We don't, we don't fuck around here. This was true. Yeah. Yeah. This is a real dick. That's Steven from, uh, Topeka Kansas. This is not a Hollywood dick. No, that definitely isn't. That's a short and stubby one right there. Uh, good for him. Yeah. Good for everybody at home. Now you get to enjoy whatever kink you have. Go through this fucking catalog at Adam and Eve.com. It's, it's, I always say it's like the cheesecake factory factory menu. It really is. It's endless. It's fucking endless. Promo code drinking bros 50% off plus free shipping and Adam and Eve.com. Next up, Biden administration admits they are trafficking illegals. So go back to the story we were, we're teasing at the top of the show. Joe Biden's administration has admitted transporting migrants on secret flights into the U S and lawyers, uh, for its immigration agencies claim revealing the locations could create national security vulnerabilities. You don't say, uh, customs and borders protection has refused to disclose crucial information about a program last year arranging flights for thousands of undocumented immigrants from foreign airports directly to U S cities. Uh, it means that while record numbers of migrants were flowing over the southern border last year, Biden White House was also directly transporting them into the country, uh, use of a cell phone app has allowed for the near undetected arrival of over 320,000 aliens with no legal rights to enter the United States. Yeah. So it's an app on your phone instead of like a visa, basically. So we've been wondering over the past couple of years how these people are moving in and out of airports without travel docs, they just gave them an app now, yeah, um, which is illegal as shit. Yep. Nothing legal about that. They don't have the fucking right to do that shit. Uh, it's, it's a complete subversion of, of federal law. And now they're trying to silence immigration judges as well. So the union that represents immigration judges and their staffs and shit like that has been talking a lot of shit. And the same way that the fucking border patrol union guys has been lighting up my orcas for a couple of years now, uh, especially over the past six months or so, um, the justice department has now issued a gag order so they can't speak out anymore. Great. Which is always good. It's always good. Then when somebody's trying to expose, uh, unlawful activity, the government comes in and says you're not allowed to, um, we'll see how that works itself out because I think their collective bargaining agreement comes up pretty soon. And that's going to be a point of contention for them because judges don't care to be silenced that much. Um, and, you know, it gets even like the fallout of this stuff. We know. So the Lincoln Riley Act passed today in the house. It will not pass the Senate and as a matter of fact, 170 Democrats voted against it. And all the, all it says is if somebody is charged with a violent crime, they get deported. There's a detainer put on them by the federal government that states are required by federal law to obey, which is already the case, by the way, that they're already required to do it. They just don't. And that person gets fucking expedited removal, ERO, get the fuck out, uh, 170 Democrats in Congress and in the house voted against that. I can't imagine why, right? Why? I mean, honestly, I'm not even, I'm not even being glib here. Like what the fuck could you have against that particular thing? It's one thing. If you want bulls on parade, open borders and shit like that, but somebody commits a violent crime, you don't think that's a reason to identify and get them to fuck out? I don't get it. I don't get it. I know they asked her family to, uh, to appear tonight at the state. Oh, they'll be there. Yeah. Oh, they will. I think so. Yeah. Okay. Um, and, and a bunch of other Sean, uh, uh, well, there's a bunch of people will be there tonight. It'll be interesting. Um, what, what did you almost say there? Uh, uh, it doesn't matter. Sean who? Anyways, uh, I think he put it on his anyways, doesn't matter. Okay. So we've also seen a rush at the border of exotics, which is to say non Latin Americans, right? Yeah. Chinese people specifically haven't come over the border and we've been wondering what the fuck that's about. Is it dissidents trying to escape the country? No, it turns out it's a snake head gang, right? That's been working with the cartel snake head gang from China, working with the cartel to traffic people into the fucking United States. So sex workers, uh, uh, nail salon people, massage people, which are also sex workers, I guess. Yeah. Um, like ch- these Chinese gangs known as snake heads are operating in synchrony with the Mexican cartels known for the brutal people smuggling tactics, the snake heads have long ferried migrants and unsuspecting nations around the world. Uh, they're working to secure entry of the US for thousands of Chinese nationals. So first the Chinese secure, uh, the route through a smuggler paying thousands to fly them from their native country to Mexico and other Central American countries. And then they get picked up by the snake head gangs who then liaise with, they pass them off to a fucking Mexican coyote who gets them over the border. Yeah. And there's, there's one particular guy, uh, who made it a walk. There's a lot actually, but there's one dude that was basically trained by US Special Forces that's now our country somewhere. Uh, there's an Iranian assassin who's in our country right now. He's, he's in Florida somewhere, like seriously, they put out a press release the other day that he's in Florida. So I guess so somebody might find him. I don't know what the fuck was it. Was it a welcoming party? What was the sitch there? He's here, uh, the, the, the intel note said that he's here to target members of the Trump administration for some reason or another probably because he knows Trump's going to butt fuck Iran as soon as they come, he comes back into power. Um, so others arriving legally after using the CBP one app, which the app we talked about before have been tied to the other 320,000 migrants that have come here. Some of those came into the country legally via the app were observed by, were observed by daily mail in San Diego last week. They were greeted by taxi drivers who refused to discuss the arrangement or how they were hired. So the go, the US government or an NGO is hiring, uh, uh, uh, mass groups of taxis to pick these people up once they landed the airport and then take them to random places. This is all being funded with taxpayer money. Correct. Um, and this has been going on for a very long time now. Yeah. Um, the back to the Asians, uh, real quick are the Chinese nationalists that are coming over. Uh, interestingly enough, when we did this, uh, story, maybe three or four weeks ago in the show, I was, I was telling you that 60 minutes piece that I saw, they all looked attractive and they were dressed nicely and everything else. And it was like, man, what's not we, your Muslims are sending over here. Sure isn't. It's fucking intelligence operators. That's what they're doing. Same thing that Russia did in the next week or sixties. Yeah. Mm. A little bit of both probably. Um, but this right here is all this fucking presidential races about. This is the only thing that fucking matters right now. Um, states can vote on abortion. And if you don't like this abortion laws in your state, you have the ability to move, frankly, like that sucks, but that's how federalism works. That's how it was designed to work. If you don't like the local politics where you are, you can either work to change the local politics or you can fuck off somewhere with that agrees with you. Mm. Doable, right? Um, Congress will never be able to pass a federal abortion ban. I don't care how many Republicans are in what positions and if they did, it would never withstand the Supreme court ever, right? Because they've already said that it's a state's right issue. That's why Roe got fucking overturned. They're not going to fucking go back and make it a federal law. Now it doesn't make any sense. So this election is about stopping the invasion at our southern border, no matter what the cost, right? And regardless of how this, the, the gaggle of squawking twats on fucking MSNBC the other day, talking about like laughing about, uh, Virginia, Virginia, like they were talking about how in their home state of Virginia, the number one issue for voters, not Republican voters, for all voters was immigration, like, we're not even the border. I guess we got a border with West Virginia. And then, you know, we hear, we, we've known that they've been flying people around all over the country for the last three years and the dead of night, right? They do this on the right flights. Yeah. Um, numerous times, they're still pretending, not only pretending like it's not happening. They know what's happening. They're not stupid people. They know what's happening. Not only they're pretending like it's not, they're pretending you're dumb for believing that it is, even though the evidence is right in front of your face. So that all this election is about, no matter what else you care about, the economy, whatever the fuck else, foreign policy, this is about securing our border because if we don't, we don't have a fucking country. And then to your points, um, when everybody talks about the border of like, oh man, it's Texas, Arizona, New Mexico and in California, it's not true because they're shipping them all over the goddamn nation. So it's not just about the southern border. It's about where these flights are coming from and everything else. And if we don't shut this shit down, uh, we're fucked as a country. And I agree, this upcoming election for the right is going to hammer immigration. The left is going to hammer abortion and, uh, it depends on what you believe in tonight. I'm curious again to see what he's going to say about immigration at the state of the union here because it ain't great. It ain't great. Uh, next up, the worst secretaries ever under secretary of states for political affairs. Victoria Newlands, uh, known for her ardent support for Ukraine and hawkish anti Russia views will retire in the coming weeks. She's one of the most responsible, uh, for tanking the Ukraine deal with Russia before the war began because we needed to, quote, degrade Russia's military capabilities and quotes, their, their Russia's extremely competent military capabilities who couldn't handle Ukraine. Mm hmm. Which is nothing. Ukraine is nothing. They have no army. You know, it's like fucking farmers and more egregious. They have no air force. Nothing. Yeah. That, it still blows my mind that Russia doesn't have air what supremacy, probably. Yeah. That's fucking wild. They definitely, well, they, they do technically supremacy or superiority. They have supremacy. The Ukraine only has this small amount of fucking, uh, aircraft that we've given them over the years. Those affix F 16s and shit like that. Yeah. And some of them that are supposed to be on the way that haven't gone and all that other stuff. Well, we said we weren't going to send those. But yeah, so Victoria and Newland people, she kind of came into focus recently because of this Russia, Ukraine bullshit, but, uh, she'd be no surprise. She was a fundamental part. She was, she was Dick Cheney's person at the state department. Okay. That's a rat shit. Right. So she helped push that fucking bullshit narrative. She's the one whispering in Colin Powell's year when he was secretary of state, the fucking blah, blah, blah. Hey, look, man, little, little vile, just a little vile kill everybody. That's her. She's the fucking she is to Colin Powell. What Dick Cheney is to George W. Bush, basically, right? She has been a warmongering cunt for years. One of the most incompetent pieces of shit that served as the secretary of state, uh, attaché ever, ever, right? She was the ambassador to NATO during the later parts of Bush's administration, uh, and stuff like that. How'd that work out? Not great. And then she presided over, uh, uh, she was the PR director, basically for Obama during his drone, drone campaigns, she liked that. She is one of the biggest pieces of shit ever, then you have Mayor Pete, who is he's back out of the stump for Biden. I don't know if you've seen it. I did. I saw him, uh, do an interview on Tuesday night. Starting his ass off, just saying like wildly insane, like fucking easily disprovable shit, right? From the, from a position like, first of all, uh, you're not supposed to be campaigning for president and your official capacity. Yeah. Right? Like you're not supposed to be endorsing candidates from your official government capacity. That's not how this works, bud. So forget about all that though. There have been catastrophe after catastrophe, there has been catastrophe after catastrophe that deals specifically with his job, the secretary of transportation, railway disaster after railway disaster, chemical spills a couple of them, like two months ago, I fucking massive amount of fertilizer was stolen off a fucking train. You didn't hear anything about that. Did you know? Yeah. You didn't hear shit about that. I didn't hear one word about it. And then there was a glow, like a, a global international supply chain disruption. And this motherfucker had been on paternity leave for the past three months leading into that and didn't even show up to deal with that, right? Probably the most, I don't know who you would, I don't, we don't think about the secretary of transportation very much unless they're this bad. You don't know. You're never supposed to know their names. Yeah. Um, then there's my orchus, you know, he owns the border. All of these problems are because of him because he's a little fucking bitch. And, uh, uh, then there's the secretary of defense, right? Lloyd Austin, DEI, CRT in the military, the biggest problem facing US military is white rage. Like, oh yeah. Because we're the ones doing all the fucking fighting there, bud. Um, the Afghanistan pull out went about as badly as you could possibly have hoped for. Right. Uh, and I, I guess we don't really pay that much attention to cabinet secretaries unless something crazy happens or unless they do a really good job or unless they look like clown, like John Bolton, maybe, but. And I don't know how you would even quantify something like this, but it feels like this is the most incompetent group of secretary, cabinet level secretaries. I'm masked at one time that I've ever seen in my life, like I've followed politics for 25 years now. I've never seen anything this incompetent before. When you don't hire though on talents, um, and you're just hiring on diversity, this is what you get. You can go ahead and lump in, uh, fucking John Luke Picard, the, the white house press secretary into that mix as well. Yeah, but we've had incompetent press secretaries before, totally, but it's just, it's all of it across the board where you're like, fuck, there's not one person that I, I look at there that I'm like, all right, they know what the fuck's going on or they're at least trying. Um, it doesn't seem like it. Now this is the, this is definitely the most incompetent group that I can ever remember. Uh, I mean, like it's, it's, it's almost, who's doing their job? Correctly. What cabinet level person is doing their job correctly? Maybe the D and I, the director of national intelligence, maybe maybe or the CIA director, they haven't, I mean, well, no, because they were spying on Americans. Yeah, but I, I guess, but at least they did a good job of it. I was going to say, right? Cause we didn't know for sure until, uh, uh, Shellenberger and fucking Matt Taiby exposed that. Um, we're getting some comments here. Let's see, uh, Supreme board justice. Does it make sense? Oh, yes. It's my board. Close the borders. Yes. My board borders. Thank you. That makes sense. But yeah, I'm like, honestly, I just wanted to pose this question to everybody. Does it feel like this is the most incompetent group ever? Cause there's not one military success under the sex deaths belt. Not one, like everything that's happened has been fucked up Ukraine the way we've dealt with that. Yep. We're like, it's not going great. Right. Uh, the state of heart. Would you put Bush in there? Like, was any of his, uh, cabinet and a good? I didn't like Cheney. Well, Cheney was the VP, but the cabinet level people, um, Colin Powell was pretty competent. He lied to the UN about weapons of mass destruction. Yeah. So, you know, what, I don't know what you would want to say about that. Who was the secretary of state? Uh, after him, uh, Connolly's arrest. Yeah. It was rice after him. Condy. Um, and I mean, just think about our foreign policy. Like you just lump DoD and secretary of state together, basically, and think about how our foreign policy's been since 9/11 and it's only been good, frankly, when Trump was in office. Yeah. I don't know if that's because of him because he, he didn't really get along with his fucking cabinet people either. I don't think he should. He also is treated him like they're fucking employees. He also had, uh, Bolton in as his, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was what was Bolton? Uh, he, he was the, uh, for Trump, he's Michael's brother, um, great singer if you don't know. Michael Bolton. He was, he wasn't the ambassador of the UN again, was he? No. Uh, John Bolton. Mr. Moustache. He was the national security advisor. Oh, NSA. Yeah. That's right. Not the NSA, but the national security advisor. Um, yeah. We haven't, we haven't had a good, a solid group of people in a while, no, to be honest. Um, and when Michael Bolton's brother can do a better job than you, then you know, there's problems. Well, I mean, especially if it's Michael Bolton from office space, yeah, all of them because he got fired. All of them. Uh, speaking of Michael Bolton, if you're out there listening to him right now on whatever device it is, you better get a pair of these Raycon headphones brother and tell me how am I supposed to live without you? You're not, can't live without the fucking Raycon's kids. Where are these every goddamn day? I wouldn't if they weren't the best for real, man. This job, uh, doing three or four shows a day, I don't have to Raycon's on shit, man. I'd be loud as fuck. I'm already loud as fuck. New year is, uh, is already in full swing here. We're in March kids. If you don't have these goddamn things, what are you doing? What are you doing, dude? Make some changes in your life. It's March. All right. Wake the fuck up. Grab some new headphones, Raycon's everyday earbuds, look, feel, and sound better than ever. Those little guys that go in your ear, I got the big dogs on here for the podcast every single day, uh, but a good pair of wireless earbuds, uh, is indispensable. Uh, they got premium audio at the perfect price points. You got to go with Raycon. These are about one fourth of what's, uh, the other companies are beats and all that other bullshit. Um, they got this, uh, optimized gel tips for the perfect in-ear fit. Uh, that's for, for guys with huge, uh, ear holes. Okay. I'm one of them. I don't really know why it's. Yeah. Like, uh, Josh from Montana Knife Company, huge deck, huge ear holes. Yeah. Uh, at least they come with all these, uh, tips. You can, one of them will fit. I promise you. It's not like those shitty apple ones that fall out and, uh, and then you see them on the HRA group team and then my fucking ear drafting somewhere. Do you know? No, we don't know where it is. Just get the fucking Raycons. Okay. That's it. Raycons give you eight hours of play time, 32 hour battery life and, uh, and that price, man, dude, you cannot beat the fucking price over there. Uh, it's no wonder Raycons everyday earbuds have tens of thousands of five star reviews. Uh, I like the three customizable sound profiles. They got the ear, uh, bud, the tap option. Boom, boom. You just hop over on another call if you need to noise isolation and awareness mode are also on those things. And, uh, and again, dude, I like the big dongs for the show and for writing. So go to go buy Raycon.com slash drinking bros today to get 15% off your Raycon order plus free shipping. That's by raycon.com slash drinking bros to score 15% off and free shipping by raycon.com slash drinking bros. Get these headphones. We've had these for years, uh, huge fan of these, uh, I want to add a story. If you don't mind. I want to add one. I wanted to ask you about it. Um, first off, uh, they're having some problems here in, uh, New York city, the governor there, Kathy Hawkel, ha, well that that's in the last story. It is good. Um, has, uh, ordered 1,000 national guards man, uh, to guard the subways in New York city there due to crime. There's a word for that. What phrase I guess called martial law. Hmm. Is that what we're doing there because they, they weren't a fan of stop and frisk, but now we've brought the national guard in to actually stop and frisk. Uh, Bob, pull up the footage on a Twitter. If you wouldn't mind me there, just pop open the NYC subway and type in national guard there. Uh, so this is fun because when you walk down the stairs in there, uh, you're just greeted by a thousand people from the national guard. There you go. Boom. There it is. Look at that dude. It's a cop up front. The national guards in the background. This is reminding you of a TSA right there initially a little bit except for TSA doesn't have dudes with fucking rifles. Ah, you're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. In the subway. But yeah, that countries that that is, that is what this is. Like you're going to see, uh, the militarization of, of a lot of public spaces over the next couple of years. Right. They have to do something. They've created this fucking chaos. Let's just do this whole story. Sure. San Francisco is having the same kind of issue. Um, are they really? Uh, the liberal bat, well, they, the voters are taking control there. It's interesting. So the liberal bastion of San Francisco pivoted rightward in Tuesday's elections as voters responded to ongoing drug homelessness and crime crises by approving policies that bolster police and require drug screening for welfare recipients. Um, the, the results represent a major victory for mayor London breed, some who, who's referred to as a moderate Democrat, which is a fucking crazy shit I've ever heard in my life. Yeah. She's a defund the policeor, um, uh, who faces a tough fight for a second full term in November because she's fucked that city up so bad. So she hitched her political future to three ballot measures, um, and all three of them passed, um, to be clear, breathe completely fucked that city up and then voters added the ballot measures, uh, counter to her leadership. Correct. Right? Like that's how California works as a ballot measure state, um, she didn't fucking propose these ballot measures. She decided to jump on board with them later. Like she fucked everything up and then the voters like, Hey, why don't we like have police and stuff? Well, this was a city vote. Right? Yeah. So it wouldn't be a state. No, but it's like California as a state, the cities, the counties, everybody has ballot measures every single year. I think in a lot of states where you can't do statewide ballot measures, like Texas, for example, you cannot do statewide ballot measures in Texas, but you can do city ballot measures. Cause that's how again, like all our camping bullshit got taken out. Right. And San Francisco just did the same thing on this ballot. And I believe, cause I was watching this as it was unfolding. The vote was high. It was like 65%. Yeah. People are fucking pissed. So it's, it's, and it's not like, um, this might be the biggest case of gaslighting in politics I've ever seen, which is saying something, man, cause she represented everything that was wrong with progressive leftist. She's not a moderate Democrat. I don't know where the fuck they got that story from Politico said that. That's absolute nonsense. Um, voters approved all three measures on Tuesday, including, uh, one to screen and mandate addiction treatment for people receiving county welfare, which by the way, the Republicans tried to do in California, fucking 20 years ago, I think, or something like that. And everybody shot it down because it's racist. Right. Yeah. Um, she says, we want San Francisco to be exactly what the people who live here want to see, uh, and that is a safe, affordable place to call home. You might be able to make it safe at some point, but you'll never make that place affordable. That's retarded. I guess comparatively affordable, um, so just a handful of years ago, attaching such strings to cash assistance for low income people, policy that's actually up red state policy, Florida does that a couple of other states like that, um, would have been political suicide for anybody. Uh, uh, the city's progressive activists have historically led movements to rain and police and prosecutors and emphasize approaches to addiction that favor treatment over punishment. They call it harm reduction, which is handing out free needles, open air, drug markets, so on and so forth. Um, but the political ground in San Francisco is shifted pretty rapidly, right? Like it's, and it's not just San Francisco. It's all over the country. You're seeing the Pacific Northwest States are recalling those stupid laws about letting people do drugs in public and shit like that. Like, I don't, I don't give a fuck of drugs or legal or not. I'm going to do them. But I want to, I'm not going to fucking shoot heroin into my nutsack on the fucking street in front of a bunch of kids, which is what they allowed. Um, is it, is it getting your system faster going to the night? I just like it. Okay. I just like it. Um, but the quality of life issues, this is, this is like quality of life crimes is one of the biggest parts of community policing or broken window theory, right? It's like you arrest people for quality of life crimes, little small stuff or find them or whatever. Uh, I, I prefer arrest over fines because I don't like people getting fucking the state just stealing money from people. But like if you're not loitering and shit like that, that's what we're talking about. We're talking about theft, because theft under a thousand in California is basically legal now. Yeah. Right. Yep. You don't even get a, you don't, you get a fine. You don't even get arrested for it. It's not even a misdemeanor anymore. It's a fine. Yeah. It's all right. Uh, stuff like that has been a big problem for California. That's why Chesa Boone, that fucking retard that was their district attorney got booted last year. He got recalled successfully last year, um, for just all this progressive nonsense. Now, meanwhile, New York has gotten so bad, right? This kid, Daniel Penny is on trial for his life right now for trying to save people from some fucking violent asshole who had been arrested multiple times for kidnapping and all sorts of other shit. This guy has been arrested for penny chokes his ass out, uh, and the guy, and the guy fucking dies. Now he's on trial. Meanwhile, they've had to, they've had to put the national guard in the subway. So if I'm Daniel Penny's lawyer, I'm like, Hey, you know, maybe we should just get Daniel Penny to go back to the subway and you guys stop being a bitch about it. You know what I mean? Let's put him back in uniform, get him back on the subway here because this is, if it's this fucking bad, uh, cause the other thing I've, I've lived in New York, you know, and I've said this a few times on the show, I've lived there, um, never seen anything like this in my entire life. Is this what you want your city and your fucking neighborhoods? Cause this, the, the training goes through every fucking single borough neighborhood, all the shit. Like, is this what you want your life to be? Is like the national guard everywhere because crime is out of control, homelessness is out of control. And then you got the fucking immigration issue, like if this is what you want America to be, this is real goddamn close to our world country here. This is absolute what people like Kathy Hochl. This is exactly what they want America to be a police state. Sure. Cause they're in control of the police. But before, why defund all this other shit? Is it just to put? Yes. It is. And you make the, and by the way, the Republicans have done this before as well, but their, their angle on it is always to privatize things instead of to get the federal government involved. It's the same fucking playbook, just different. So if you remember during, I think it was an Obama's first term. It was right after the tea party thing, um, the Republicans took the house and they passed a law that required the fucking postal service to fund their pensions 75 years into the future. Oh, yes. Right. Which means people that won't be born for 10 years basically already have their, and then, then the Republicans spent the next two fucking election cycles like we've got to privatize the postal service because it's in like it doesn't make any money. If they weren't funding pensions 75 years in the future, the postal USPS is as incompetent as they can be sometime, profited about 600, 650 million a year, profited, right? No. Like it's a government organization that's actually making money for providing a service instead of just extracting wealth from the fucking community, right? So Republicans did it that way, uh, to privatize. The left is what they do is they hammer local jurisdictions so they seem incompetent and they try to bring the federal government to take care of that, right? Yeah. That's the, it's the same fucking playbook, just two different things. Uh, this though, this scares the shit out of me where it's like, dude, I want to go back to New York. I want to enjoy my fucking life. I'm not going to New York. No, I'm not going to town. Anytime. Me neither. I'm not going to now, but I'm just looking at this. I'm not going to see. I used to love San Francisco too, every, every weekend, I would drive over to San Francisco, go to Green Street, go to Soudini's, it's like an old Italian restaurant that was built right after the earthquake in 1905. It's one of the oldest buildings over there, right? And have fucking a really nice meal, walk down the street to a bakery, get a espresso, fucking hang out, drink some wine and shit with my buddies and then fuck off back to my house. Yeah. And Oakland. Unlivable. The entire place is fucking unlivable now, right? New York is one of the best places in the world to fucking hang out at. Yeah. Not anymore. No, no. Shit. Even Philly's better than any of these. Philly's one of the best cities in the country right now. I mean, so far, we'll see, we'll see what happens with Philly, but I know they're trying to, at least fucking Fetterman's trying to keep immigration all that bullshit out of these cities. So we'll see. Yeah, his brain got fucking rattled and now he's like, become a repute of apparently. You guys. It's pretty, it's pretty funny. He's that that's somebody's going to have to do a fucking documentary on that guy one day. You could probably eliminate all that National Guard there and just put him down there with the Superman shirt on like Goonies. And I think that would scare the shit out of people of like, all right, I'm not committing a crime here because sloth is down in the subway with us. Next up, Exxon is gaslighting. The world is off track to meet its climate goals. You don't say. And the public is to blame Darren Woods, chief executive of oil giant ExxonMobil, his claims prompting a backlash from client experts over there as the world's largest investor owned oil company, Exxon is among the top contributors. It's a global planet heating greenhouse gas emissions, but in an interview published on Tuesday, Woods argued that big oil is not primarily responsible for the climate crisis. The real issue, Woods says, is that the clean energy transition may prove too expensive for consumers liking. He says the dirty secret nobody talks about is how much all of this is going to cost and who's going to pay for it. The people who are generating those emissions need to be aware of that and the price they pay for generating those emissions. That is ultimately how you solve the problem. No, he said the people who are generating those emissions need to be aware of and pay the price for generating those emissions. So what he's saying, what he's saying is the end user, the consumer, the people driving cars and such and taking flights, they're the ones on the hook for this. By the way, do you know that Exxon has a higher ESG score with the NASDAQ or whatever the fuck it is, then Tesla does? They have a higher environmental score. This oil company is a higher environmental score than Tesla, which is a clean energy company, essentially, right? Well, supposedly. I saw those, there was reports done about roughly two weeks ago about electric cars versus gas powered cars and it wasn't close, man. And I think that's why we're all going back to gas powered cars. So their measure is based on DEI, right? So-- Again? What do you mean again? With the DEI? Yeah. So when your ESG score is heavily weighted for spending money on environmental causes, for inclusivity in the workplace-- Oh, Chris. Yeah. --which has nothing to do with the environment. Maybe it does. No. Nah. No. There's a lot of Mexicans that like to shit in the woods. Yeah, but that's not illegal. Yeah, but they're just leaving the toilet paper there and I'm just like, man, there's a fucking-- Well, a toilet paper of biodegrades. That's not a problem. Yeah. Yeah. So does shit. It's organic. Woods said that the world was quote, "not on the path to cut its planted heating emissions to net zero by 2050," which is what people want to do. By the way, that's not necessary at all. There is no global warming crisis. It's all nonsense. It's fucking stupid. We have plenty-- oh, God. Let's go read fossil future. I'm not going to say you're explaining this shit. Experts say that woods rhetoric is part of a larger attempt to skirt climate accountability, you don't say. Yeah. The biggest oil company in the world. No new major oil and gas infrastructure can be built if the world is to avoid breaching agreed temperature limits, but Exxon along with other major oil companies currently basking and record profits, by the way, is pushing ahead with aggressive fossil fuel expansion plans. Now, that we should absolutely be doing. Yeah. And that party is fucking right. The weird part about this is that he's saying that it's your fault. Yeah, that's like McDonald's calling people fat. There's a fucking quote here from an economist at Columbia Business School who says it's like a drug lord blaming everyone but himself for drug problems. It's true, but he's also got a financial stake in this as well, where, yeah, he wants everything to remain oil or he's out of business. Yeah. I mean, we should, we should, we should fucking drill, drill, drill. I think, who was it? Was it McCain? I know he said, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb. It was a Sarah Palin drill. No, she didn't drill baby drill. She, that's too many words in a row for her to get right. But there's, they're all four letter words. There's one more story here. So Sheldon Johnson, you remember that name, Bob, go ahead and pull this guy up. He, he's a staffer for the public law firm, Queens Defenders in New York. Okay. They, they provide legal defense for, uh, poor people, I guess, or poor black and brown people in Queens, New York. Yeah. Well, probably all over New York, I would assume he was arrested today for murder after a severed head was found in his apartment. Whoa, what? Yeah. And there he is in his jumpsuit. Wow. He was on Rogan a month ago. Yeah. He was on Rogan a month ago. You're fucking kidding. So according to the victim's neighbors, I can't get on Rogan. I'm not cutting off heads. Yeah. According to the victims, so that's 44th precinct. I don't know if that's Queens or not. What does it say under there? Yeah. Bronx. That's a Bronx. So he got arrested in the Bronx. It looks like, um, according to the victims neighbors, they could hear him pleading with Johnson before two shots rang out. Uh, so he was also illegally armed, I suppose. Sure. Um, it's weird how the law didn't stop him from having that gun or for murder in the guy. Did you not? Did, are they going to ask him whether he knew it was a law or not? He may not have, he may not have known that murder was illegal. Um, police found, police found in the apartment, a human torso and a blue bin and a head in the freezer. I'm not sure what he was planning on doing with the head. Holy shit. Um, decorative. He was going to fuck that thing. Could be. Yeah. Just pry the mouth open and fuck it. Um, so surveillance footage shows Johnson arriving at the apartment with the blue bin. He showed up multiple times in different outfits. Uh, neighbors could hear the guy pleading, please don't. I have a family before he got killed. Um, on the podcast, when he was on Rogan show, he spoke out about his time in prison as he advocated for criminal justice reform. He also spoke out about changing his life around. So apparently this guy is a friend of Alvin Bragg, somehow there's a bunch of pictures of them together for some reason. Um, not that that has anything to do with anything, but yeah, it's, this is a very bizarre story. He's like a criminal justice reform activist who has spent time in prison for something or another, and now has cut some dudes head off, but Bob posts a picture with his dude's face. Cause this, this, the one that you got up here, I can't see what he looks like. That's the fucking dude, huh? Son of a bitch. Maybe it's Rogan, dude. You go on Rogan. You just want to cut off ahead. Cause you're super carnivore after that, you know, what I'm just saying. Maybe I'm, look, it's surprising to kill him with a, with a bow. I've got a theory on this. What do you do? So they were at Sing Sing together, him and the victim. The guy's name is Colin something. Where is it? Colin's small. Colin's small. The guy's name. Okay. They were at Sing Sing together. I don't know what either one of their crimes were yet. Let's see. Um, but weird that he, oh man, these pictures are great. Go to find the New York Post article. These pictures are great. Yeah. It's a prison rival, right? Uh, I don't know what it is. It's a prison rival rivalry or if it's a lovers quarrel. Ooh, I was thinking that dude. It could be the only crime that was committed was of passion. Like you, you know that, um, the other guy looks like a top two. Does he? And this guy, Sheldon Johnson looks like a bottom. Oh boy. Um, these are the pictures here. Yeah. So the, the, the one by the elevator looks like a little gay man getting off. Like you know there's cameras. So he obviously didn't give a fuck that he was getting, uh, going to jail for this. So under, and, and, and no way did he think he was going to chop this dude's body up and put it in a fucking bend like that with all these cameras everywhere and drag it outside and not get caught. Where did he dump the body? He never got out of his apartment. Uh, they arrested him there because the neighbors call it in. It sounds like, well, you can't, man, I mean, again, after living in New York, you can't fire a gun inside there. It's not great. What the fuck is going on there, Bob? Pop that picture up. Is that the person? No, this is, uh, Johnson entering the apartment in a blonde wig. See that's, that's not real, is that real? That supports the gay theory a lot keeps, keeps scrolling to those other pictures. Keep scrolling. Scrolling. Oh my God. Um, so this is, this is the guy he killed. That's like a hard ass dude. This is the top. Yeah. He's the top. Bits. So you know what happened now, right? Yeah. He came into that wig. Homeboy was like, I don't like blondes. Yep. Shot him, cut his head off. He got to, he got to with that point. This looks like a hard motherfucker here, man. Shit. And he was, he showed up in the wig? This guy? Not him. No. Oh, the other. Okay. So fine. Go scroll up, back up and find a picture of this dude's face. This guy's heads in the freezer. Yeah. Oh man. That's going to take up a lot of the freezer. He's got a big head. Same with mine, dude. This is take up half my fucking freezer, my dome son of a bitch man. This is a wild story. There's a, hold on. Let me find it. He was a rogue in a month ago? Yeah. What's in the box, Joe? Now keep, go, go down to that picture of him with Alvin Bragg. And then zoom in on it. Because this dude's got a gay face. Yeah. Alvin B. Ragg. Oh, look at that. Scroll up. Yeah. They bone. Zoom in. Look at that guy's face. Yeah. They both bone. And then show me the other guy. Yeah. The other guy's a hard motherfucker. Yep. Look at that. Zoom out because that guy's head's so fucking big. Look at that, dude. So that dude was definitely punking and having sex with the other dude's butt. Yep. And I don't know if this is rude. It could be revenge or it could just be a lover's quarrel. Like he wanted to break. Like being on the down low, that's for jail. We're out now, dude. Like we're not fucking when we get out. I got, there's horrors now. Or forced love in jail. He's getting his revenge. Yeah. I told you to hold my pocket. I told you to hold my pocket motherfucker. And then boom. It could be wrong. Cut his head off. It could be wrong. Maybe it's a financial dispute. Could be. Maybe it's political. Scrabble. You know, it could be over a scrabble dispute. He found out later the word wasn't actually a word and that lied and said it was in the dictionary. I can tell you what, it's not. It's not over a woman. No. Definitely not. It's over each other's buttholes. This is going to be a fun story for the next few weeks. Yeah. Which is good for this. This just come out right now. Yeah. Like an hour ago. Oh yeah. So it's good for the murderer, I guess, for Sheldon. What's his name? Sheldon. He's going back to prison and getting butt fucked more. Which is probably what he wanted in the first place. Yeah. Sometimes you got to go home. You know? Sometimes you go home. Coming home. Coming home. He's going to say that while he's backing up into a cell with his butthole exposure. Sure is, dude. Yeah. It's a nice beautiful gaper like the one right over my shoulder. Yeah. You can see that. Yeah. YouTube doesn't know what that is and that's the point, kids. Look, we got some listeners here in the studio for Drinking Bro the Week. Who wants to come up? I like how after we said exposed gaping asshole. We're having people up on air here. Who's back there that can actually come up without a job here? While you're walking on up, by the way, go to drinkingbrows.com for your submission. For Drinking Bro of the Week, just click on the tab and it'll go directly to our inbox. But if you're here in the studio, you can just do it live while we're here. In the meantime, Peru's the catalog here. What do we got there, Bob? For the new products here in the Drinking Bro's store. It's right. The Creed 2024 shirts are in there. Those are selling greats right now. I just bought three of them. Obviously, crime corner to celebrate the new show. Yeah, dude. Somebody actually dropped one off the other day and asked it to be signed by Jesse. So we're all in there, dude. We're all up in the business over there at drinkingbrows.com. New hoodies are in there. Everything, dude. Those politician yard signs are coming up soon. And if you're celebrating spring break, cheers if you're borging it up here today. Ruth Bader Ginsborg was my favorites. Yeah, borg it up, dude. Put that mic about an inch from your face. Say what's your name? Wes. Wes. What do you do, Wes? Fire alarm technician. No shit. Yeah. How do we look in here? I don't need anything. Sure. Yep. That's exposed. Oh, I've seen it. Yeah. Okay. We're good. Anybody ever call you Kanye West? Several names. Okay. Don't. Well, yeah. You breathe hard and fucked up. I get it. Yeah. I get it. Who do you want to keep drinking real of the week too? Several. A couple. Got it. Fire away. Mom and Dad, first of all. Rest in peace. Okay. Got me through the mom and dad situation and my girlfriend that I moved here for. Oh, no shit. Yeah, yeah. What's your name? Well, I moved back. Okay. So Emma. Emma. Yeah. Shout out Emma. What's up, Emma? You drinking hard Fs here back there? Couple. Yeah. You're getting lit. Keep it straight. You've got some fucking secrets, dude. How many people have you killed? Can't talk about it. No, you've got to head in the freezer, don't you? Yeah. I get it. You've got to keep it cold, dude. You've got to keep it cold. What'd you bring here? Red breast. Red breast. Oh, fuck you. That's the good stuff, huh? Do we deserve it? Oh, yeah. Okay. Popping on over here. I'll have a shot with you. I've been drinking out of a fucking borgob and drinking a borgol day. Let's go. Yeah. I'll pop it up. I'll have a shot with you. What's up? It's Thursday. All I have to do is coach Charlie Sockerts tonight. Yeah. Nobody will notice. It was one time when my wife was just like, "Hey, bro, I know you're doing shots to drink a bit of the way. You've got to brush your teeth for your coach," and I was like, "Oh, shit." But one of the best coaches I had as a kid, all he did was get fucking wronged, so you know. We had a football coach that did the same thing head while Turkey under his seat. Did he really? All the time. Did you guys win? I didn't play football. Wow. They did win. That's all that matters. If you won, all right? Nobody gives a shit as long as you're winning, bro. Shit. If Ryan Day was drinking all goddamn season one, I wouldn't give a fuck. Cheers to you. I'm just going to drink right out of the bottle. Is that disrespectful? No. Get good. All right. I hope so. Yeah. Cheers. Any cheers you actually say? My 50th is next month. Congratulations. I just turned 34. Big year for me. Yeah. Big year for me. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You want to? Let's do it. Hey, we can do a shot here. You're a good liar. For the dead homies. Not at all. I just look super young. There's nothing I can really do about it. And scientists all over the world have shown up in my house to study me and they're actually asking me to sign off my, my, my, my Borgans for science. Right. I, so I actually got them to print on my license this morning that I was a Borgan donor. I didn't know that was an option. Yeah. So that way I donate this Borg to a needy person who wants to drink and get fucked up all day. Um, I got to give another drink and bro to Dan Holloway. Yeah, he does a great job, man. Much respect. Coolment. Anybody else? Nope. Well, if you pop a bear, of course, come on, come on. Yeah, I love it, dude. Who else is back there with you? You guys been partying all day today. Who else is back there? Come on up to him. You can feed butt fuck on the microphone. Come on up here. We appreciate it. You have people been buzzing all day here today. It's been a fun one. It does feel like spring break when there's a, when there's a nice crowd in here and everybody's buzzing all day. You're like, God damn it. It does feel like spring break. Yep. There you go. What's your name? Zach. Zach. Look at you, dude. You're a fucking beefcake, dude. Try to be fucking. Short house. You know? Yeah. I don't even know what that means. I don't know either. I just made it up. I like it. You're a real small stack, aren't you? Oh, yeah. Um, what's your PR on bench there? You look like you put up a decent amount. Um, 285. Probably 275 in my, in my prime. Do better. Not do better. I'll try 315 the other day. No bigs. I don't want to brag about it. I want to see that. Yeah. Yeah. I'd love to. I'd love to. What's your, what are you at these days? Uh, right now I only do incline. So like 285. I only do incline. Who the fuck says shit like that? I'll do flat. Why? Why? Because it doesn't do anything. I only do incline. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Learn from the best, dude. Of course. Hey kids. I only do incline out there. Um, what's your name? Zach. Zach. Sorry. Fuck shit. That went through me off. I only do. What? Bored you skinny, man. The borg. It's borg against the machine. The borg identity. Yes, it is. Uh, and then that shot red breasts is really good. By the way, Kanye West. I appreciate it. Who'd you like to give a drink in brother week to? Uh, we'll start my girlfriend's season back there. It's her birthday today. Is it really? Yeah. How old is she? She is 37. You're never supposed to say that about a woman. She's 25. Good. There you go. Just had her 25th birthday. Cheers. What are you guys doing tonight for it? Um, sushi oysters anal probably. Wow. Who said anal dance? Of course. That's fucking anal. Yeah. Uh, it's her birthday. Not yours. Yeah, right. Yeah, you got to switch that up. So she penetrates you tonight. She pegs you tonight. If that's, I guess. I mean, we'll go on Adam and Eve and we'll find some stuff and. Okay. I just had oysters the other night. Where was it? A place called the Blue Cafe. It was pretty good. All right. What else are you looking for tonight? Steak? Maybe. Yeah. I mean, she's always out for steaks. Sushi. Shit. What's that place? We used to go to a place raw downtown. It's not bad. It's good enough. Um, it means it's pretty good. You want to get there right when it opens though. They hit a nice bar and it should be nice out tonight. It was raining earlier, but it should be all right. So yeah, dude. Enjoy your life. Yeah. Happy birthday. We appreciate it. She must be a fucking down-ass homie because to hear this bullshit all day, you have to be. She, I mean, she'll listen to it mostly when I'm around. She listens to a little more, but I'm like, babe, now hear me out. Yeah. It's a birthday. Yeah. But can we go do this? And she was like, yeah, let's go. Okay. Awesome. Well, we appreciate you being here. If you're in the Austin area, pop on in the studio. Doors are open and free hard af celsers can get fucked up with us and enjoy your day. I filled up a borg with it today. So you can too. All right. I was surprised how much a real gallon holds when you're dumping alcohol in it. It's been a while. It's been a while. And I was like, oh shit. It's fucking, it feels like a lot for Christ's sakes. Go to iTunes, rate the show a five star and leave a quick review also. Head on over to Spotify. It's just a five star and you can walk away. Did I forget anybody back there? I can't see beyond this monitor over here. One more. Come on up, dude. Come on up here before we get off air and pop on down. Both of you can come up. I don't give a shit. I got nowhere to be, dude. I work for you guys. So I don't care. What's your name? Bruce. Bruce? Yeah. Is it Bruce or Bruce? Bruce? There it is. Put it one inch in front of your face because that's all I hear every time. Every time. You have to. One inch. How fucked up does this guy get to this? He's pretty fucked up. It's okay. I just mess. Everybody comes in. It's hard to ask for the first time and they're like, "Ah, man. It's fine. I'm going to drink it for a year. That can handle it." No. No, you can't. Who would you like to eat a drink every other week to? I'd like to give it to my wife, Gina. She makes me the best person that I could be. Air Force retarded. That's for Dan. Okay. Retired, actually. But I would have been a chief if I had my wife, Gina, with me from the beginning. But instead I had some dead beat. Ah, it happens. But I got rid of her. Now I got Gina and she makes me the best person that I could be. And I appreciate that. You know what I'm going to ask, obviously, right? What's up? When you guys are having sex, do you look at her and say, "Gee, gee, gee, gee, gee, gee, gee." No, I just call her China all the time. Okay. Yeah. I would switch it over. Just China. I would switch it over and go a little Gilbert Grape on that ass. Yeah. Maybe just for some excitement in the bedroom. Yeah, why not? Dude, on a ghost bed. Well, you have a ghost bed. It's great, isn't it? You guys. That's right. It's great. I've been listening since you had AIDS. Oh, shit. So my first few shows I listened to was just your wife and... No way. And then you came on. I was like, "Who the fuck's this?" Yeah, you were like, "Who the fuck's this?" And I love you now, though. The big Rob fan. A very big Rob fan, yep. And I'm from... Rob Fox? Just south of St. Louis, you know. Oh, the Lou. That's right. Band-Aid under the eye. All right. That's right. I like it. And then who's your friend here? That's your girl, man. Yeah, thanks. So my name's Dave. Dave. Yeah. Yeah, Dave. How many have you had today, Dave? I've had a couple. Yeah, yeah. I can tell. Yeah. I can definitely tell. The great thing is, my girlfriend, hopefully fiance. Is she back there? No, she's not here. Okay. She's at work, actually. Okay. And she works at Total Wine. No shit. So, yeah. Great. So, which is great, because I'm in Houston. So, she got me the hookup. Fuck yeah, dude. That's great. First thing. We're at every single Total Wine, a hard day of Celsius, at every single Total Wine in the state of Texas. It's great to hear. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. She's a receiver. So, it got in the back door, and she was the first one who saw it, and I was like... That's awesome. Yeah. That whole phrase there's got to change the receiver, and then she gets it in the back door. I mean... That's a little much after the story we just did. You know. Like... You can just say she works there. I mean... And she's a trusted force. I could prove it, but, you know... Who'd you like to get a drink of brother week to? No. Actually, I like to give it to my best friend, Derek. Derek. Yeah. Where's Derek at? He's in Seguin. Okay. Yeah. Hopefully... Next time he can be with us. Yeah. Born and raised. Both of us. Fantastic man. He's got two kids. Is it listening to the show? He is. Okay, great. Yeah. So, hopefully he'll come here next time I come. So, I drove by the place multiple times for work and couldn't make it, but today I could. So, that's fantastic. Awesome, man. Well, thank you for being here. Thank you guys for all your support. We greatly appreciate it and everybody at home, dude. We see the pictures of you taking pictures with the gear on and the seltzer and all that stuff. It's all unbelievable and it's all super helpful to keep this whole fucking shit wagon on the air. Thanks for tuning in, kids. For Anthony, Anthony Holloway, I'm Ross Patterson. This is Drinking Bro's Fake News Good. Not anymore. Thanks for tuning in. Thanks for tuning in. (upbeat music) (dramatic music)
