The Todd Herman Show
Tim Cruickshank on grief and what “God, Country, Team” means as he leads his family through the aftermath of Liz’s death Ep-1713
My dear friend, Tim Cruickshank, retired Navy SEAL and CEO of Bonefrog Coffee, joined me in studio. We talked a bit about grief because he has lost the most important person in the world to him, his wife, Liz. This is the toughest battle that this warrior has ever fought. He wasn't quite ready to talk about much of it. We talked about what his wife meant to him and about what it is to be a Navy SEAL. And Tim shared with us the kids that he and Liz raised, and how they're stepping in to help with Bonefrog.
What does God’s Word say?
“Blessed are those who mourn, For they shall be comforted” (Matthew 5:4, NKJV).
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- Duration:
- 50m
- Broadcast on:
- 11 Jul 2024
- Audio Format:
- mp3
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We're going to work into talking about this loss, but we're going to start by talking about a T-shirt Tim's wearing that says something notable about the Navy SEALs. And frankly, I'm going to seek his input on this madness I've done to myself of agreeing to go to SealFit and already committing the money. And we'll talk about this. Plus, dealing with grief is a strong man. It's hard. It's an exploration process for a lot of people. And I think strong men need to hear from a very strong man and what he's going through. We'll do this with the help of renew.healthcare. That's renew-R-E-N-U-E.healthcare. And of course, with God Almighty. The Todd Herman Show is 100% disapproved by big pharma technocrats and tyrants everywhere. Now, from the high mountains of free America, here's the Emerald City Exile. Todd Herman. Today is the day the Lord has made and these are the times in which God has decided we shall live. And what an honor to sit next to my dear friend, Tim Crookshank, in studio. You guys have heard him, seen pictures, but first time most people have seen you on video. So good to having the high mountains of free America. Thank you, man. It's pretty cool to be here. Thanks for having me, Todd. What do you think about it, Ho? It's, you know, driving over from Washington. It's like when you come across the border, you're like you're entering America. I was joking with my brother yesterday. I'm like, you know, as you go across the border, there should be, you know, a border check in fireworks and all kinds of stuff. You know, it's pretty cool. How do you find the people? Oh, God. It's amazing. Everybody we've met has been kind and thoughtful and friendly and neighborly. Yeah. It's like going back in time, the way it used to be. Yeah. You don't feel that in the Seattle area. Oh, it's pretty nice over here. Yeah. There's a coldness, I think. It's interesting because the Seattle area prides itself on being, they're the kind ones or the tolerant ones. It's almost clichéd to point that out. But they're the ones who spend all the money to help the homeless. And they're the ones who are voting for all these policies that are supposed to be very kind. And yet at the heart of the city, there really is a coldness and a decision to look the other way. And I know that's kind of the cases in big cities. But has it been recent that you've noticed that over there, that that heart has changed? Yeah. And I'm not saying that there aren't kind people. There still are some over there, but I think they're all starting to move over here. Last time I was here and I went to church, I met all kinds of people that I knew. I'm like, oh my God, you moved over here. But yeah, you're starting to see that slip away. And it's kind of sad. Neighbors aren't talking to each other anymore. And people have lost their manners. You go to Costco, you go to the stores, and they're ramming you with their carts. And nobody says excuse me anymore or open the stores for each other. It's weird to see that all starting to go away because it's what we had growing up. Where'd you get your manners? My parents, my parents, my dad was a Marine and my mom was a stay at home mom. And they raised us the way I think all of our neighbor kids were raised to be courteous and kind. And the neighbor's parents policed us as well. If you messed up over at their house, they were on you as well and they'd call your parents. It was just the way it was back then. There is a closeness that can be created through courtesy because you are being reflexively kind. And I was in the show earlier this week talking about blessed are the merciful for they will receive mercy. Yeah. Right. And showing that. And I've told this story before, so I won't make a long version of it. But when we moved over here, my wife had taken care of the closing of the house and the last details. She drove over during a snowstorm and my daughter and I were already here. And we got the house sort of set up and we split duties that way. She dropped by the store before she drove home. Walking out of the store, the grocery bags broke. And she spilled groceries all over the sidewalk. And a woman in her 80s stopped and said, honey, let me help you pick this up. Let me help you. And my wife said, no, no, no, ma'am. It's cold. She goes, no, let me help you. And then a big dude in a big truck, high-rise truck, stop. And you ladies get in your cars. It's cold in here. I'll pick this up. Where do you want this, ma'am? Good. It's good. And my wife drove home in tears because her view, her experience of shadow would have been, get the hell out of the way. Where are you blocking people? Picked out of them. Yeah. Where's that coming from, man? I don't know. I don't know. But we all need to try to make the difference. And I think they were talking at church about, you know, we wait for those kind of things to happen like they used to happen. But to not wait anymore, we need to be the change and step up and make sure that we are setting the example and getting out of our cars and helping people, ladies with strollers and people that are dropping things or whatever, just be courteous and kind. When you come to a place like this in Idaho and everybody is nice and friendly to you, it changes your demeanor and who you are, you're happier, you want to be friendlier. And we can make that change over on the other side of the mountains too, we just got to do it. Yeah. Well, we can make the change around the country and around the world. And, look, I failed on this front of being the guy to reach out when my dad was living. He was such a such ill health and he made a decision to be that way and it was a passive decision, part of it was passive, aggressive, I won't change for the world. So my dad refused to treat his thyroid, he refused to treat his obesity. And I feel shame that it didn't go to him and just take over. So I can't make up for that. He's gone to the Lord, thankfully. I can make it up for it with this podcast family to have this blunt conversation. If you are an obese person in all likelihood, you're like a hundred, one hundred million other Americans and that you well may have fatty liver. That's not a thing you want to live with because it can lead to liver disease. It definitely makes you feel sluggish, it slows you down, it affects sleep quality, it affects your health. The people at liver health formula have the strangest thing they want you to know. Even though they've got a 24/7, 365 support line to tell you how to use their products, even though they've got a 365 day money bag guarantee, all of that, they do not want you to be on liver health formula for the rest of your life, period. They want you to concentrate on losing the belly fat. Liver health formula can, in fact, help you lose the belly fat and protect you from liver disease while you're getting it all back together. Here's what you can do. Just go buy a 30 day supply of liver health formula, you get two free gifts from them. Go to getliverhelp.com/todd, that's getliverhelp.com/todd, that's help. Getliverhelp.com/todd. You're wearing a shirt if you're on the video service, if you're not using the video service, you can get a seven day free trial at video.toddhermonshow.com, that way you can see what Tim and I look like chatting together. You can see Tim's shirt, it says on it, "The deed is all U.S. Navy SEALs." I have one in the back, this is the deed is all, but this is a little bit more. We're both wearing bone frog shirts. What does that mean? Ed Byers, who received the Medal of Honor during his ceremony, used this saying, and it's a saying from somebody else, "The deed is all not the glory." The younger guys took it and put it above the platoon huts as a reminder that we all, regardless of what it is, do our job, not seeking attention or glory for what we do, but just doing our job. I made some t-shirts like the one you're wearing that has the whole saying on the back of it, but then I decided to shorten it a little bit just to the deed is all because I think it has a lot of meaning for different people. It doesn't have to be you're a Navy SEAL and you're going and doing your job and that. It could be the stay-at-home mom doing your job. It could be the dad that's going out and working two jobs to provide for his family. It could be anything. I use it kind of like the old saying, "Just do it," but I think this has a much deeper meaning. It's one of our most popular shirts because everybody's got something in their lives that they're doing and we should be doing and we learned about that in church yesterday that we should be doing these things for the right reasons and not seeking attention. God knows what we're doing and that's all that matters. Are you bothered at all by the attention that the teams get and people who market their job as seals into fame or leverage that, does that bother you at all? I think partly guys are using that as long as we're doing it in the right way, not seeking attention for ourselves but using it to help other people. I think it's kind of a double-edged sword, but I think in the end, we are supposed to be silent lawyers. We're supposed to do this job without seeking the attention and just do your job. Bone Frog's a respectful God country team on the coffee bags and obviously 10% of proceeds go to the Navy Seal Foundation. You don't hide the fact that you're a seal, obviously, but you also aren't coming out and saying, "I, Tim, did these great things and here are the deeds I created." It's not about me. Not about me. It's about one, the whole reason I created the company was to honor my teammates. That's it. For people to learn about them so they didn't die in vain, keep saying their names, tell the stories, and we make a promise to each other that if something happens to you, your wife and kids will be taking care of for the rest of their lives. That's why we give back to help the community, which is like a family for all of us. It's important to me. That's an expressed promise you guys make each other. That's cool. That's really cool. Tell me about a teammate comes to mind. The first guy that was close to me that I lost was Neil Roberts in the beginning of the war and the story of Neil and what he did, and I'll give you a brief synopsis of this because most people won't get this. In the beginning of the war in Afghanistan, Neil was in the back of a helicopter. He wasn't strapped in, but he was leaning out the back, looking at troops on the ground and trying to gather some intel. They got hit by an RPG and that hit caused the helicopter to shift suddenly and he fell out the back, fell out the back. From what reports have told us in drone footage has shown, there was over 200 Taliban advancing on him. What would most people do? You'd run. But Neil didn't. He engaged the enemy by himself with his primary until he ran out of bullets, eliminating a lot of them, went to his secondary and kept advancing on them in the wide open, in the wide open with no cover until he ran out of bullets with his secondary. They overran him and later the guys found his body and its gear and went and eliminated the rest of the Taliban, but that's the mindset. Those are the stories that we want to tell these guys and their heroic acts and he didn't do it to be a hero. He did it because of who he was as a human being and that's how he was trained and he didn't think twice about doing it and I could tell you story after story after story like that. It was guys like Neil that when I retired I had lost so many friends that I had to tell their stories and that's what Bone Frog is all about. Keith Camura created the Bone Frog and it became this iconic symbol in the SEAL teams that represented all those guys that lost their lives. I think if I'm not mistaken before I put the money down to go do SEAL FIT, which is in Tohono outside of Coronado and Mark Devine runs this all of Mark if you don't know Mark. I think I called you and said would you be okay if I did this because I'm desperately aware that people go play soldier and I don't have, you wouldn't shoot me with this week and I don't have the capacity to play a soldier, but you said it was okay. Mark's put on a really great program out there and it's not playing soldier really it's finding something within yourself it's really what it's about. For some guys it's maybe training to get ready the younger guys but for a lot of guys that he has there maybe it's team building they're looking for or maybe it's finding something within yourself you didn't know you had or confidence building or whatever it is I think it's a great program that he's set up. There are because we get cohorts that you get in meetings with before you go. I'm going to be one of the oldest guys and I asked you the other day a question what's the trick you guys had to wear these utility pants and these boots and it's hot and I said what's the trick for staying cool you said the most comforting thing you know what you told me. Yeah there's not. No trick. No tricks. It's just hot you just have to deal with that. Yeah. I just did a workout yesterday where I purposely got in kit and ran this 5k and that heat is such a separator and 91 degrees you know by the time I run down to the lake and then back up to my house I'm really wondering if that's if all the things I worry about and getting hurt that's a likelihood I will get hurt I just hope it don't get injured I will obviously get hurt but what was your did you have a concern when you went to buds which you know my thing is a tiny little portion was it heat was it exhaustion was it did you have any concerns. No and I joke with my friends I think when we're young like that yeah you feel invincible right so I I didn't even think about it to be honest I didn't even think about it okay I've done a 12 hour workout I've done a 16 hour workout those things were done in the cool I completely aired in this like help me here. So going into what I went into back then there wasn't a lot of information out there there was more information and I think it was you know it's hearsay and myth and all these things and you didn't really know what to expect unless you knew somebody who had gone through it and they give you information so you heard a lot of things a lot of rumors a lot of stuff but you didn't know until you got there so you guys tell me you tried to get ready the best you could and I'm not nervous but I'm become uneasy with the weather factor because I don't know how I train to be a 91 degree weather every single day 12 hours a day and I'm not going to do that because it would be over training like well you know unless you live somewhere that's like that constantly I think you know going into it every oh you got to immerse yourself in ice water in a bathtub and you got to you know prep yourself like that it doesn't help you get there and it's still cold and it's still hot and it's still you figure it out as you're going through it right that's part of the process well and I I've made the decision that there is I don't want to go in there in a I'm gonna get through this mentality I made the decision I want to go and thrive go and thrive and go and learn it's a learning process yeah and I want to seek a moment where as an old man I can be helpful to the team I deeply my biggest worry in this is that if I'm seven young guys oh great we get grandpa right that I want to find some way that grandpa brings something to the table because dang it I don't want to screw up my cohort right that's you're not I okay you're gonna be fine so Tim tell us about another teammate Brian bill Brian bill was a dev group part of extortion one seven it's one of our bags and it's meant solely to honor everyone that lost their lives in that mission that op has a lot of question marks it was the largest loss of life in so calm history and yes there are question marks and that's a whole another thing his parents do a fundraiser a big foundation dinner a golf tournament every year and June up in Connecticut I went to the one two years ago I couldn't make it that share because of everything that we had going on but take a look at the Brian bill foundation and and what they're doing up in Connecticut and honor all those brave American souls that sacrifice their lives it's truly truly an amazing story those guys okay we'll check out the foundation Brian Brill Foundation right put a link in the show to the Brian bill foundation there the reason that there's myth that has grown up around you guys I think I think the reason is the range of things you can do and then stories like that and it's I know that that you don't have to be a seal to do that for someone you serve with but I think it's a small team thing I think it's the six to eight guys I think that we can all understand like well you're really part of a small unit like when you guys are deployed together is there anything you don't end up knowing about each other no no because you you go through training that's somewhat of a you know a crucible so to speak you know so you add a baseline you've all been through this same pain and suffering yeah you know I mean so you're all brought together in a team room and then you get to know each other and we train together so closely and you get to know each other I was talking to a friend recently about you know in the dark I can tell you who's you know manning at the time the 60 now the 240 by the sound and the rhythm of how they shoot wow you can tell a guy who it is and how they walk and you hear their footsteps we were able in a lot of cases to function without talking with just hand signals and even then we're operating at such a high level when we move through areas that we operate by second nature because our training takes over we know each other better than we know anybody and that's why we're so close in such a brotherhood and willing to give our lives for each other because you know yeah we love each other yeah yeah I wanted to ask you and give you a second to think about this of when you lose a teammate you mentioned Neil you guys don't really I think I've heard you say this you don't really have time on the battlefield to process what just happened I mean you're aware of it it happens in some ways I guess you have the advantage of now you can go out on an op and take out the people who took out your friend which is your job and it's not going to happen in another seal and I don't know because I've never served but to me that would be a little bit cathartic we went and took care of the guys who ended our friend's life all right I wanted to talk to you about processing grief on the battlefield afterwards when you guys do that and then transition into I think the biggest grief you've ever faced and this podcast family has stepped up to help they love you and and they were really really great you know and happy to do that I'll lighten the mood by asking you just take a big inhale smell this the smell like a thunderstorm in here so it's right over there behind my rogue fitness shirt there's a device called the Eden Pure Oxi Leaf 2 we plug it in the studio here we don't get to have the windows and windows open and it allows us to not live here in a terrible coffee breath air because I actually do drink Tim's coffee all day long and I bring my gym bag in here a lot of reasons for it will smell bad there's also of course then the ultimate test is just cat litter so I decided at the house to not change the cat litter for six straight weeks and to keep the Oxi Leaf 2 not as over there getting sick I didn't do that but they really are powerful you come back from the day and then maybe the cat litter's not been changed it doesn't stink I mean want to be hygienic we don't want gross houses but the fact is sometimes pets create accidents the Oxi Leaf 2 thunderstorm negates that I told you about my friend Ben this week in fact I showed you the text message from Ben he left bare sausage in his truck and it aged helpfully across three or four days locked into his truck and it's stuck to high hem and he put the Oxi Leaf 2 thunderstorm in his truck overnight the smell was gone it also got rid of the fake new car smell it produces ozone o3 which bonds to the bad smelling molecules and just destroys them it eliminates them it's not an air filter those things are a fool's errand because you buy them then you have to replace the filters every year 2 to 400 bucks this is an air purifier that once in a while you wipe off with a warm cloth that's it you can save $200 right now on the Oxi Leaf 2 thunderstorm go to Edenpurdeals.com use code Todd 3 three of these units under 200 bucks it's literally $200 savings Edenpurdeals.com use code Todd 3 when you lose a guy like Michael you lose a teammate like Neil do you guys you can't process I think in the battlefield I think you've told me that when do you process that it's good question yeah in the beginning of the war and for a long time you just did it on your own um figured out a way to do that you know they train you to do a job but the back end part of it is was lacking a little bit they then created a place for us uh coming out of country to go and download and for a couple weeks decompress okay prior to coming back home and then there's a lot of things that are set up uh back here in the states to deal with it but I think it's still something that we could do a lot better job at so there's not like a there's not a ceremony um when this happens overseas you don't get to get in the team room drink whiskey just something I had a toast to a buddy um recognize anything like that yeah there is yeah you don't need to talk about it yeah there is yeah it's I don't know how much that helps yeah um you know yeah yeah I think um you know when my dad died we had that ceremony that he prescribed for us you will go a ton of pizza you eat a bunch of hamburgers you're gonna drink beer or drink soda by dad like food and so we had the occasion to go do that as a family um and that was a ritual that he and I had at that time and um uh you are right now going through uh tremendous grief and I feel your brother getting tense in this and and I want you to know that you're loved and we love you and what happens happens and if you don't want to talk about it you say and then we'll end okay I will try okay I know I know um we have been honored um this podcast family at give send go dot com slash help our Tim um a lot of people here donated um now in excess of 50,000 bucks and and outside of this audience too it's it's not just the podcast family but it started here and the notes that I see people leaving to a man they've never met because they've heard about Liz uh first of all I just wanted you to have an occasion to say something to these guys if you want to that I I'm really grateful for because there are people that have reached out to me by text and email and handwritten letters and stopped by uh the shop and talked to me and I can't even thank all of you enough for taking the time to do that having never met me um I am so grateful for that and it's a reminder of the the quality of people that are out there your listeners um thank you and I I know that I'm not not the only one going through pain and suffering it happens to people every single day and that's you know why I'm so grateful to all of you for you know reaching out to me I'm thank you yeah you've been a physicians assistant in the world you're um yeah I always when I say medic on the SEAL teams people yell at me a corpsman um people yell at me for calling you a medical I've heard you say medic you saw death you saw families go through this um when you look at the process you're going through now and you just recognize Connie that this happens every day to to human beings what's been most surprising for you you lost Liz now gosh just a month ago three weeks ago yeah me 20 second me 20 second and I had the memorial service um July 1st um what's been most surprising for you Tim about the process now that you've seen people go through it you've watched other people as a physician's assistant you've seen death what surprised you about your experiences now you've lost your wife I'm not sure I understand the question completely as far as the medical part as far as the grieving part yeah I mean we I want to talk about medicine in the medical part but I guess the the question is this let me vote down to this um you've seen death in the battlefield you've seen it in hospitals you've been there um when you said goodbye to your wife and you were holding her hand and you made this heroic trip to go see your daughter graduate is there any part of your emotional response any part of your cognitive response that surprised you you know no yeah I'm glad to hear you say that no you know why I'm glad to hear you say that is because it shows this connection you've had to your patients and your teammates and that this didn't surprise you but it's magnified it's magnified let's take a breath and have you tell me about Liz um the Liz we some of us got to meet on there rarely but tell us about Liz the human being the mom the 17 moves and standing by your kids and the teacher and how she inspired people when we first met and I apologize if I cry you have permission to cry you have permission to cry these people love you I love you if it's too soon we'll back off I want to talk about her talk about her um so when we first met there was an immediate connection and we just never stopped talking and uh we made a very conscious effort to raise our family like what we had in the CL teams as a team and so she would sign her her emails co-founder team kirk shank but it was a mindset that we as a family were back to back all right each person was a valuable member of the team and their voices were heard and so there was buy-in and I think a lot of people they don't give their kids the opportunity to speak up right it's the the parents only that's my way or the highway and um we gave our our kids that she was a force of nature she was loving and kind and she sacrificed everything for the team for the family her career her sanity you know she was a stay-at-home mom and uh when something happened with the kids at school she's fierce and she protected them with everything that she had and uh you know people that watched the service saw what our kids had to say about her um and it was you know when it came down to her being ill having a team member go down someone that we loved and adored I put every ounce of energy into helping her because that's what she would do for me yeah and honestly uh it was an honor to stand by her side hold her hand through arguably one of the most difficult times of all of our lives yeah she deployed you bro she deployed you um do mind if i tell that story because it might be hard for you if you don't want to uh i'll hold back oh okay hold back let's not talk about that right now okay got it tell me about the kids man your kids rock stars superstars and like that team thing what does that mean like that they grew up with god country team like i saw someone sent me a note bro someone sent me a note they got your coffee and it was signed by one of your daughters then you know what he said in twitter he goes i'm keeping this one and he's a subscriber yeah like dude i got a note from tim's daughter yeah something that that was huge so the reason we do the notes it goes back to just and we talked about this the beginning of the show it's how you're raised right and my mom will get on us you know somebody sent you something or something nice you write them a note yeah to say thank you and it's the same way running a business i think people will get um i don't know what the word is things have become so corporate right and they want to know that they're supporting a family that is not it's family run and it and the values that it supports and to me it's important from day one we wrote thank you notes to people and we try to vary them up a little bit but you know that all the kids work at the business and we even you know before the service liz's mom was there and and she was we call her grandma bonbon her her name is Bonnie so she was signing notes grandma bonbon thank you and you know so she even she was in there helping out and she loved it yeah it's great but that's that's what the company is all about yeah um we're grateful for all of our customers in supporting us yeah and uh we try to make that known the best that we can you know making it through the day yeah i get um in guilt spirals because um you and i have different jobs and part of my job here is this is a day where i will be on mic for five hours and this feeds me uh because i'm here with a friend and i'm getting to look you in the eye and share things with you um oftentimes it's just me pouring into this and i try to not filter things i try to be who i am on the show and i'm blessed by these emails people send me and they're long-term they're five to six paragraphs and people pouring hearts out to me and at the end of a five hour recording session i it's really difficult for me to have the emotional reserve to give a note like that the honor it deserves yes which is a five right a five paragraph response yeah and just to write back and say hey i got your notes thank you god bless you feels worse than not responding sometimes so i get these emails that build up yes um so i admire you with the handwritten notes i try to respond it's really hard because i get so many and i try i'll call customers i'll try to write emails back yeah i try and i know it's you get hundreds it's a lot yeah it's and then some yeah yeah right it is i wanted to ask you and give you a second think about this the medical system what you learn in this and and what the takeaway is from that because you think of team um you know you should have a care team when you go into the hospital you should have a care team for yourself um i use a product that has absolutely taken me off of a program that i have to tell you i don't know if you've heard me say is i i had been eating um i'd been eat this will freak you out as a physician's assistant i was eating four ibuprofen at night and often four in the morning it's nuts right i mean this i show you my liver that made it through it i've got it screaming normal for a lot of people but i but then i i look into the camera i talk about how big farmers aren't your friend that i had to come to this this podcast now me and apologize i've been telling you this i've been snacking an ibuprofen when they came to me with native path krill and i will never forget the conversation i wanted to love the company and i do i'm drinking native path hydrate because i've had um like four of these cups of coffee this morning bone frog and they said omega-3 is on oh guys please don't come to me with the omega-3 thing i hear this all over the place it doesn't work um i eat fish almost exclusively it's not gonna happen for me and gents please try it they're a great company i think you love the founders try the products and two or three days in i did not need ibuprofen and that was this pause i got the team back in the phone and they had to think this guy's an idiot he's a moron we just talked to him four days earlier i went back to repeat everything you said i don't think i was listening okay so it's more absorbable than fish omega-3 it is crustacean based it is more potent in that way better return on this it's 60% more absorbable than vitamin c for helping with immune system issues and all the risk factors for ibuprofen your liver your kidneys your brain so i am so glad to say i'm ibuprofen free you can be as well and inflammation is a huge thing it's sugar-based you can also cut out the sugar i'm telling you a lot of information comes from sugar i don't eat sugar well usually 99% of the time good on native path krill and dot com slash tod toss the ibuprofen get this buy a bunch of it and the more you buy the more money you save and plus go see what free gifts are offered now native path krill dot com slash tod um okay i'm totally in on that i'm sold okay i'm sold yeah right my body's a car wreck after 25 years in the seal teams i'm in okay all right so that one he's in on native path krill dot com slash tod i think i have something here but let's actually offer that i'm gonna buy some of that um yeah gosh you guys put your bodies to your heck um or hell what did you learn uh positively and negatively about the medical system of which you were apart from a stavira your career as a physician system yeah so you know um i've worked in the medical system for over 30 years both as a combat medic with the seal teams and then becoming you know the navy trained me as a as a pa to further my knowledge and help the team and so um medical knowledge one thing it's a unique situation being a medical provider and a caregiver and you see behind the curtain in different ways um i'm really frustrated in what i saw and i think a lot of my colleagues have seen the same things and i've talked on other podcasts about the health care system and how frustrating it is and i think um just like we're seeing the loss of courtesy and manners and and all that kind of stuff uh covid was an eye opener for everybody on the health care system and that in a lot of cases they're not out there to help us the people they're out there to help themselves they've got their hands out and it's all about making money and i think in cancer care it's about money it's not really about helping patients i think the doctors are well-meaning and but they're pushing chemo and radiation and and things like that that are not helping patients liz died because of complications from western medicine treatments that i think is the hardest thing of all of this to swallow is that we trusted the system and the system is not set up to help us yeah i've heard from so many people um in the wake of the covid lockdowns and the nonsense of that and the masks and the you know i've interviewed families that i contend well in fact it's not just me these court cases have been allowed to move forward um one is an abuse case um death by abuse it's a civil abuse case it couldn't do criminal but this has been allowed to proceed into a jury trial yeah um this is with the remdesivir and the the force venting of people so i've heard from a lot of people that the system is not helping the system is harming but then i went to mexico and i was with um two uh Richard Jacobia wrote sugar crush we're talking about sugar and information uh dr john fiegler i'm gonna have both these guys in the show john did the first ever stem cell transplants in 1970 both these guys told me that when refined sugar came on the market doctors begged the government don't do this yeah do not release this stuff it's poison they said the same thing about the um the lobotomies they said the same thing about so many of these moves and these guys have left the insurance based world to operate so that they can care information according to the Hippocratic oath to hear you say it from a perspective of a provider and then a greeting husband i mean it just puts a bow on this what should happen like what what what should occur in our system first of all trust but verify do your research it's on you and i tell people all the time when you go see the doctor they're going to spend 15 minutes with you they're going to go through things really quickly and then they're on to the next patient so it's on you uh for your own health care you got to research you got to make sure that what they're prescribing is correct it was a constant battle staying on top of everything that they were treating liz with that's the first thing stay on top of it i research hours and hours every day about different things when we look at our health and what they're putting into our food alone uh the different um additives and stuff like that there's over 40 different additives that they're putting into our food supply that are illegal in Europe and the rest of the world and you got to wonder why they're doing that then the pesticides that they're doing we talked about it a little bit over the weekend that they're adding things that are lowering lowering men's testosterone yeah corn and and strawberries specifically there's certain pesticides you can't get them off yeah and then that leads to other problems with guys testosterone going down as they age and things like that and i could go on and on and on about that but it's it's on us to research and figure it out and there's so much conflicting information on the internet and all that it takes time yeah talking to each other and verifying and it's there's these patterns Tim where um they don't want us eating red meat which produces testosterone there was this whole effort they made um during the covid lockdown is to say that being in the gym is white supremacy that that that weightlifting is white supremacy there's these articles that's um the more time you spend in the gym the more like you are hard to have a heart attack uh that weightlifting is toxic masculinity and then i hear about these additives that are reducing testosterone same groups of people who want us to have a lower population i don't think they want strong men we can go way down this rabbit hole i know i mean we don't need to but we could but i think the listeners get it because they're being bombarded with messaging like this yeah and we're seeing the results of what's happening yeah out there yeah because of it um when we continue to i want to chat with you um about um family as team and how you could help folks who are starting families um structured the team that you've done in your family how you did that and it's the fruits i see the family stepping in um Liz has passed on we all know that she's with the Lord Jesus anybody who knew her no is this she's told with the Lord Jesus uh but i want to go back to team and then then wrap this up with just another loop back around to how being a seal has prepared you for what's next and if you're a facilities manager at a warehouse and your hvac system goes down it can turn up the heat literally but don't sweat it granger has you covered granger offers over a million industrial grade products for all your operations including warehouse hvac maintenance and even better they offer access to experts and fast delivery so you and your warehouse can both keep your cool call 1 800 granger click granger.com or just stop by granger for the ones who get it done you set the team up the family up as a team inspired by what you learned in the seals and give us just some quick elements and what that's involved is that family meetings is it a motto how do you do team as a family? so in the beginning it started out a lot different when the kids are young versus what they are now yeah so um we we started from day one in how we took care of them it's building a foundation building trust knowing that we as their parents have their back and talking about the process you know we would do room inspections with them you know and just kind of get them into the the thought process of doing those kind of things we would have team meetings down in the family room where we would all sit and talk about it could be any random topic but allowing them to have a voice and being interactive in their lives constantly reading to them every night being there at their schools being at every event that they did because they need to know that you're present yeah that you're part of their lives yeah that it's not just lip service that they kids will read right through you you know if it's fake they know it yeah and so you've got to be there and be a part of everything and as they get older then you start expanding their roles and responsibilities but the mindset is that you're all back to back that you have each other's back yeah and if something happens you're going to be their form um and getting them to be vocal and getting them to look out for their siblings they're looking out for us just as much as we're looking out for them um and they're incredible kids and they've grown up into kind responsible kids that have manners and you know our productive members of society and God is mixed in there you go to church but you got to want to go to church you got to want to have God in your life and so we talk about that and and Liz uh you know do her bible study and come home and talk to the kids about it and yeah all that stuff it's uh yeah it's a process and God's so central to who you are God country team and um I'm thinking about team and you told us that you guys take a pledge like something happens to you on the battlefield we're going to make sure that your family is taken care of and um I'm going to bet that you're hearing from teammates from all over the world in this period of time so that's all the time right this time it's more of a pledge amongst ourselves where we're deployed that did yeah it's an understanding that if something happens to you we're gonna we got you we'll take care of the family and that kind of stuff and and uh it gives you peace of mind to go do your job and not worry what's going to happen to your family if something happens to you is it extending into emotional support now from your teammates yes yeah absolutely yeah and what I noticed about you is when we went to well many things but when I had the honor to eat dinner with you and to share with you and and shoot with you um you already picked up like three new missions you told me I gotta clean this up this up and this up and I know that you're still processing the grief and we're going to pray for you and I want this podcast family to pray for um Tim's continuing grief process that God gives him what he needs that the Lord gently takes him by the hand and goes through this pain with him with his family lifts it from Tim when it's time sits with him while it's not time there is a time to grieve um but I was so honored Tim to see you already mentioning like I've got to put these things together put these things together let's not leave God out of that that he's going to put you back together in a way new way in a new way but man he loves you so much and he's a God who sees can I dovetail on that yes Liz was such a believer in knowing that you know she was saved by God that that's where she was gonna go she was fearless in the face of what she was going through um even the kids talk about this she never wavered she endured more than most people ever could and she walked the walk she didn't talk about anything that she was doing she just did it just did it and kept going she kept going and it's it's inspirational so God picked the right wife the right man I was not worthy not even for a second yeah I love that you say that and I know that you mean it and um even so kinder through time and and working through this and thank you for having an honor to support the brand to drink the coffee thank you for telling the stories of your teammates and thank you for being a friend I value you and I love you and you talk thanks for having me this is a Todd Herman show please go be well be strong be kind please make every effort to walk in the light of Christ if you're a facilities manager at a warehouse and your hvac system goes down it can turn up the heat literally but don't sweat it Granger has you covered Granger offers over a million industrial grade products for all your operations including warehouse hvac maintenance and even better they offer access to experts and fast delivery so you and your warehouse can both keep your cool call 1-800-GRANGER click granger dot com or just stop by granger for the ones who get it done