Galen Call's Sermon Library
"Heartaches Without Number - Part 2"- May 26, 1985 (PM Service)
I'm glad to be able to report that part of Frank's team got here in time for his baptism. At least they saw him get wet. So we're glad for that. The four guys are all graduates, right? As of this afternoon, just two of you. Two are graduated this afternoon and the other two have a ways to go. Well, we're glad you got here tonight in time to watch Frank get dunked. Good coach. And it's always a joy to see the barberks. You're about to go back to the Philippines. I think I overheard that much. Even though you're not officially a part of our mission's family, we want you to know that we count you as a part of that. You are our kind of missionary and we stand for you do theologically and in your work and we thank God for you and for the strong testimony that you're building for the Lord in the Philippines. We welcome all of you tonight who are visiting. We're going to turn in the Word of God to the book of 2 Samuel and pick up basically where we left off last week. We will turn to 2 Samuel chapter 16. As we have studied the Word of God, we have noted that David fell short of the convictions that he had within his heart concerning right and wrong. Before we are too swift to condemn him, I think all of us need to stop and consider the fact that all of us do, all of us come short to some extent living up to our convictions. But because David failed as he did, he failed to deal with his compromises adequately, sadly his family suffered. His sons were thrown into moral confusion because of their father's failure and then his failure to properly handle his failure. That is witnessed in the fact that Amnon, his oldest, assaulted his own half-sister, thus repeating David's sin of immorality. David was very angry about that, but he did not discipline his son who had sinned. Absalom, who was Tamar's full brother, was embittered by this attack against his sister and by David's failure to deal with Amnon as he should have. Absalom lost respect for his father and took the matter for revenge into his own hands and killed Amnon. Absalom then nurtured rebellion still against his dad, especially when he was brought back to the kingdom after several years, but only half-heartedly forgiven by David. I think Amnon, or rather Absalom, thought this way. David had been fully forgiven of his sin, of adultery and deceit and murder. God had forgiven David, why couldn't David forgive his son? Then I think he was still bitter regarding the fact that Amnon had gotten by without discipline from David. That all led to the rebellion that we're studying about, but Absalom nearly took the kingdom from his dad. There are some lessons here that I want to talk about briefly before we go on, lessons for parents and lessons for children. Most of the parents, I want to say these things, and I say to myself as much to any of us. When your family knows of your compromise and your convictions or your failures, deal with those openly and honestly. Do not try to hide them from your family, for they know better than anybody exactly what has taken place. A few weeks ago I shared with you the sad testimony of my friend who, for the second time, committed adultery a few months ago and is out of the ministry. One thing that he told me in the conversation after that, which I respected, was that as soon as he repented and came to himself, he immediately got on an airplane and flew from California to Seattle to sit down with his son and tell his son exactly what he had done and why. His son is getting married next month, just a young man. I appreciated the fact that he was willing to deal openly and honestly with his son. He had done that the first time eventually, and the second time he did it quickly. It is essential if there is to be a continued respect on the part of the children for the parent. So when you compromise or you fail, deal with it openly with your family. Be honest with your family. It will only continue the respect which they have for you. The deceit in trying to hide and cover your failure will engender bitterness and disrespect. The second lesson I see for parents is this, don't fail in the discipline of your children. That was David's great failure with his kids. I recognize that on the scale of 1 to 10, parents range in their effectiveness and discipline. And all of us, I'm sure, want to be as effective as possible. I talked to one brother pastor this last week who had two staff members that went to a certain seminar recently. And they came back just throwing up their hand saying, "Anybody can live up to all the rules and regulations and the 15 steps and 25 principles that this man throws out to people." And frankly, that is the result sometimes when you go to some seminars and you read certain books, you say, "How in the world can I possibly live up to that standard?" What are the amounts to, I'm afraid in some cases, is just plain old-fashioned legalism, law-keeping. Nonetheless, we do want to be good parents, we want to be good parents, and we must not fail in our discipline of our children if we're going to be that, especially do we have to be cautious of becoming passive toward our children. And I think fathers in particular need to be careful of that. It's so easy because of the pressure that fathers face in the office, and of course mothers do as well who are working to go home and there's what the kids go, and that's something we can't allow. It takes work, it takes discipline on our part, but we must be faithful to discipline our children if we don't, we'll pay a price. We do not see it immediately, but down the road there's a price for that. Then a third lesson I see is that we need to evidence whole-hearted forgiveness and unconditional love when our children blow it. That doesn't mean at all that we condone their wrong, but when they repent they need our assurance that we accept them, that we still love them, and even before the time they repent they need to sense that we accept them as our children and as people, though we cannot accept what they are involved in perhaps. But especially when they return, when they come back, when they repent, we need to evidence whole-hearted forgiveness and unconditional love that reaches out and embraces the child so that the child knows that our love is constant, David failed in that and he paid a price. Then a couple of remarks for children. First of all, expect that your parents will make mistakes. There are no perfect parents any more than there are perfect children if you'll pardon me. So don't become bitter and angry when your father or your mother fail you. Realize that they're going to make mistakes, that they do have failures in their lives. Realize too that they, those failures and mistakes, do not provide an excuse for your doing wrong. You bear the responsibility for your own decisions. Don't try to lay a guilt trip on your parents. Realize they're going to make mistakes, accept them as human beings who make mistakes and love them anyway as they love you. Secondly, show maturity by loving them and learning from their example. You may even learn from their negative example. You may say to yourself, "Boy, when I get married and have a family, I'm never going to do that." Well, I suppose all of us have made that statement along the way somewhere and the thing is that we usually end up doing those very things. Nonetheless, if there are negative things that you see in your home, learn from the negative. Set that before you as a lesson as to what you want to do better, but don't reject your parents. Love them nonetheless and show maturity in your part by accepting them for who they are. Absalom failed to do that. It led to tragedy in his life. Our text indicates that Absalom's rebellion was initially successful. Right at the end of chapter 15, it says Absalom came into the city of Jerusalem. Why did he do that? Because he was marching on the city with his followers and David had taken off across the Mount of Olives to escape his son. Now as we look into chapter 16 and 17 and 18 tonight in our study, we'll find three instructions regarding life that are important for us to get a hold of. Those instructions come in the form of a lesson, a warning, and finally an example. Let's talk first about a lesson for those who experience hardship. David is going through a hard time. The fact that it was partly the consequences of his own sin did not ease the hardness of it. This was tough on David. He was having to flee for his own life because of the threat of his son. Before I give you the lesson that I see here regarding those who experience hardship, let me just say a couple of things about hard times. In the midst of hard times, there will be those seeking to take advantage of your hardship. That may sound cruel, and it is, but when you go through a hard time, you can just almost count on it that there will be those seeking to take advantage of you during that time. David faces that immediately in chapter 16 when David had passed a little beyond the summit of the Mount of Olives. "Behold, Zeba, the servant of Mephibosheth met him with a couple of saddle donkeys, and he had it loaded down with these goodies mentioned. The king said to Zeba, "Why do you have these?" He said, "Therefore the king's household to ride on, and so that you have something to eat and drink, for whoever is faint in the wilderness will have something to drink," he says. And the king said, "Where is your master's son?" In other words, he's asking, "Where is Mephibosheth?" Now, who is Mephibosheth? You recall? Back in chapter 9, we studied about him. He is the son of Jonathan. Remember that? Jonathan was David's dearest friend. He died. And David said, "Is there anybody in Jonathan's household left, or whom I may show kindness?" Mephibosheth lived. He was brought to David. David blessed him. David gave him the right to eat at his own table. He received him really as one of his own sons on behalf of his dear friend Jonathan. And he said to Mephibosheth, who had been Jonathan's servant, "Now you be Mephibosheth servant, and take care of his things," and so that was his role. And so really David is saying, "Where is Mephibosheth?" And Zeba lies. He says, "Behold, he's staying in Jerusalem," for he said, "Today the house of Israel restore the kingdom of my father to me." He is deceiving David. He is saying he's back in Jerusalem waiting for Absalom to come because he's sure that once you're gone, the people of Israel say, "Let's get somebody from Saul's family back on the throne." And he's the only candidate. Had Mephibosheth said that? No? Not at all. What is Zeba up to? He's seeking to take advantage of David and his master. He is lying about his master, seeking to get next to David for a blessing, as David's in this hard time. And David, not knowing any better, quickly gives everything that belongs to Mephibosheth to Zeba. Look at verse 4. And Zeba's response was, "I prostrate myself. Let me find favor in your sight, O my Lord the king." And so he says, "Thank you very much." And David moves on. Now it seems as though that's the end of it. It's not. We're going to come back to this fella and he's going to be taken care of appropriately. But at this point, I just want you to notice in passing that David's going through a hard time and here's somebody seeking to take advantage of him. You can count on that happening in your case. Be careful during the hard times. There's a second thing I want you to notice and that is that when you're passing through a hard time, there will be those hoping to see you fail. That's right. He said, "Well, I don't know anybody like that." Or maybe you're saying, "Yeah, I know a lot of people like that." When you go through a tough time, there are going to be those standing around on the sidelines just waiting to see you fall flat on your face. It is true with David. David went a little further to Bahiram, that was just a little bit further over on the other side of the Mount of Olives. And there came out from there a man of the family of the house of Saul, whose name was Shamiai, the son of Gira. He came out cursing continually as he came. And he threw stones at David and at all the servants of King David and all the people and all the mighty men were just right hand in his left. And thus Shamiai said when he cursed, "Get out, get out, you man of bloodshed and worthless fellow." Now you couldn't say any more nasty thing. The Lord has returned upon you the bloodshed of the house of Saul and whose place you've reigned. And the Lord has given the kingdom into the hand of your son Absalom, "Behold, you are taken in your own evil, for you are a man of bloodshed." He says all kinds of nasty things to David. And the text goes on later to say that he followed David and his interage a little further. Up on the ridge, he would throw stones down on him and curse at them and say things like his recorded in verses 7 and 8. Here's a guy who's saying, "You deserve it, you dirty dog. I love to see you fail." Can you imagine how David might have felt? Actually Absalom, David's nephew, one of his generals, had an excellent idea. He wanted to put Shamiai on a diet program. He had a method for removing 10 pounds of ugliness right from his neck up. He said, "Let me go over now and cut off his head." David said, "No." Basically what he says is, "No, God is in this. God is somehow in this. Let him go." David doesn't respond like we might think he would. But David says, "God is in it." Just be aware, will you, that there are those hoping to see you fail when you go through a hard time? I know that's tough to realize, when you're promoted at work, there will likely be those standing around saying, "I can't wait till he fails in that new job." If you're a student chosen to do a certain thing for your school, there will be those who didn't get chosen who will stand around and say, "I can't wait till he falls flat on his face. He deserves it." That is humanity and its sinfulness, its ugliness. But listen, does God help any of us from being that person who has that kind of an attitude? Now, the lesson that I see regarding David is this, how people around us misunderstand or misjudge our circumstances is not important. When we go through hard times, we need to concentrate on finding God's purpose in it. You know, even what Shimi I said to David had a nugget of truth. David was a man who had shed blood, and he was being punished for his sin. Now, some of the things he said were exaggerated, totally misunderstood, but there was a nugget of truth there. That's good for us to remember too, because even our most vile critics often have something legitimate to say to us. So when you're passing through a hard time, just remember how those around you may misunderstand or misjudge you is not really important. Do not care what they think. That's the bottom line, care what God thinks. Concentrate on finding God's purpose in what you're experiencing. Now, secondly, I want you to notice a warning, a warning to all of those who would oppose God's purposes. Those who would oppose God's purposes need to learn that to do that invites certain ruin. If you want to see your life go down the tubes, if you want to see it wasted and ruined, then get in opposition to what God is doing, you'll be run over. May I remind you of Haman, who some 600 years after this, would seek to put all the Jews in Persia to death. He was going to kill them all, and he could not wait to get his hands on more to K.I. He was going to hang him on those gallows, but it was Haman who went to the gallows. Order back up a few hundred years from David's time. Do you remember Pharaoh? The man who stood in God's way and said, "No, I will not let the people of Israel go." He ended up losing not only his son but his entire army, he was a ruined Pharaoh. Then we see it in our story here, to back up a few months, remember Saul. God announced to Saul what his purpose was, he said, "Saul, you have disobeyed me, therefore the kingdom is taken away from you and I will give it to a man better than you." And rather than accepting that and repenting as he should have, Saul said, "Over my dead body in essence," and it was. Ultimately, he killed himself. Do you remember Ishmael, Saul's son? When David came to the throne down there in Hebron, he opposed David. And there was war between the house of Saul and the house of David. David grew stronger, Saul's house grew weaker, ultimately Ishmael was murdered. Do you remember a Hithafil? A Hithafil was David's trusted counselor and you may recall the grandfather of Bathsheba. And when he had the opportunity, he turned on David. We studied it last week. He went with Absalom in his crowd. Now the story is taken up in our text. Absalom entered into Jerusalem here in the last part of chapter 16. A Hithafil encouraged him to perform a vile act in taking his father's concubines in public and lying with them, and he did that. By the way, that was explicitly the fulfillment of what God said would happen to David as a result of his sin. That was a Hithafil's advice. It was not godly advice. It was not moral advice, but you notice in verse 23, it says that the advice of a Hithafil which he gave in those days was as if one inquired of the Word of God. In other words, what he said was so practical and seemed so right to the point that it was as though God himself had spoken it. It does not mean that it was godly and right, but what he did was to claim David's throne by this act of immorality. And then Hithafil gave some further advice. He said, Absalom, give me 12,000 men right now. I am going to chase David down in the wilderness and kill him. Now that might have worked because David was disorganized. He was fleeing for his life. He was running through the wilderness to get away. Had there been a party of 12,000 sent after him, chances are that they would have succeeded. Step to front stage, one counselor of David named Hushai. Remember him? He wanted to go with David. He was an aged man, David said, no, go on back and be my spy. And you try to thwart the counsel of a Hithafil who's turned against me. So now Hushai steps up and he says, no, Absalom, let me give you some advice. What I think you ought to do is let David go on because if you attack him now and he happens to win the first battle, people are going to see that you've been defeated. You're going to lose your momentum. So the best thing to do is let him go on, then call all the troops from all over Israel, converge on him and kill him in. Now what he was really trying to do was buy David some time. That's what he needed more than anything else. But he also said, and Absalom, I would encourage you to lead the troops. Now that was the thing that appealed to Absalom. Now Hithafil said, give me 12,000 men, let me kill him. Hushai said, you lead the troops and kill David. Absalom's ego was appealed to, and he said, you know I like the plan. I take your advice. God used that. David was given time to get across the Jordan to regroup. Hithafil, who stood in the way of God's purposes, went home, his advice being scorned, and killed himself. They consider Absalom. Absalom went after David at a certain point. They made the terrible mistake of engaging David in rough terrain, in a forest, a forest that was thick and heavy, in which David and his commanders knew, and they knew how to fight in there. Absalom and those who followed him did not know how to fight. And the result was a quick victory and total victory for David's troops. Now when David sent his troops out, he announced to his three generals so that every soldier in all of his, his group heard, "Spare the life of Absalom, my son. Do not kill him." They all knew that, but word came to David's leader, Joab, that Absalom was caught. I mean he was literally caught. He was caught in a tree. He was riding his mule, and somehow got his head, probably his long hair, entangled in some branches on a tree, and the mule went on and left him hanging there, helplessly in the tree, and he could not get himself free. Now the scene is amusing, to be sure, but it's also tragic, because Joab orders some men to kill Absalom, and they said, "Hey, wait a minute, you're even what David said, not me. I'm not killing him." And finally Joab himself killed young Absalom, put a spear through his heart, cut him down from the tree, and put his body in a deep pit and piled rocks up. Beware of opposing the purposes of God. Seek to understand the direction God is moving with all of your heart, and get moving in that direction. Follow him. Finally I want you to look at an example, an example to those who would know God's heart. You may recall that David was described as a man after God's own heart. We're going to see why here in part. David, rather pathetically, was sitting the gates of the city where he was, waiting for some word from the battle, eagerly wondering what would happen, hoping that his son would be coming to him. And finally the first messenger came and blessed the Lord, and David said, "Is it well with a young man Absalom?" Notice he didn't say, "Did Joab win the battle?" He said, "Is my son alive?" I'm looking now in chapter 18 in verse 29, "And the hymn has answered, "When Joab sent the king's servant and your servant I saw a great tumult, but I did not know what it was." The king said, "Stand over here." And then the Kushite arrived, and again he blessed David and the Lord. And the king said to the Kushite, verse 32, "Is it well with a young man Absalom?" And the Kushite answered, "Let the enemies of my Lord the king and all who rise up against you for evil be as that young man." And with that remark, David knew that his boy was dead. In verse 33 you see one of the great laments in all of literature. It is the heart of a father broken. The king was deeply moved and went up to the chamber over the gate and wept. And thus he said as he walked, "Oh, my son Absalom, my son Absalom, would I have died instead of you, Oh, Absalom, my son, my son?" You say, "Why would David feel so deeply?" I'll tell you why. First place he loved his boy. Do you love your children? David loved Absalom, but I think that David knew, that Absalom was dead because of his failure. He knew that Absalom had paid a price because his dad had failed him and David's heart was broken. Here is where I see the example of God's heart because although Absalom rebelled against him, David dearly loved him. And his death, although it was a just death, was not the king's desire. And do you understand that to be the heart of God? You see, God is a loving God and he loves the world and he loves you. God does not enjoy seeing sinners perish. He does not enjoy seeing justice, give the sinner what he deserves because of his great heart of love. God is gracious and merciful and forgiving. And that is his heart toward the sinner. Yes, he will judge because he is holy, but his heart is one of great compassion for men and women. I just wonder if our heart is like the heart of God. We look at people who are miserable in their sin and suffering the wretched consequences of their wickedness and we stand back with our arms folded rather smug and say, "Well, they deserve it." How unlike the heart of God that is, I believe that David's heart here is a reflection of the heart of the Lord himself. My friend, God can be merciful and gracious to the sinner because of the work of Jesus Christ, the cross, when he bore the suffering and the hell of every sinner. Took it upon himself and that was the Father's plan. He delight to see his son in agony, of course not, my friend, he loved you so much. Dare I say it, that he would rather see his son suffer than to see you suffer in hell. That's the heart of God for you, my friend. Now have you responded to God's love, God's compassion? If you've never received it tonight, I hope you will. David reaped what he had sown, yes, and God was using the consequences of his sin to spank his son and yet God dearly loved him. Believe me in my study of David and these chapters, I am not in the least sense putting David down, David was a great man. David is like a fine piece of statuary that had a flaw, but one flaw in it, but then which of us is flawless. I think any of us has to humble himself next to David, the man after God's heart, the man who shepherded the people of Israel, not only by the skillfulness of his hands according to Psalm 78, but by the integrity of his heart, isn't that great? That's how God evaluated David's heart, one of integrity, oh God is a gracious God, he does not allow us to sin and get away with it, but he does forgive and restore. And God for that, let's bow together. I wonder this evening if the heart of God may not be broken over someone who's here. It is as though God himself were saying regarding you, oh my son, my son, oh my daughter, God sees you walking in rebellion and disobedience, and yet his heart of love feels for you so tenderly, so deeply. Would you tonight give yourself a fresh to him, Lord Jesus, son of David, David's God, we worship you. We bless you for the grace, for the heart of compassion that is yours. God I pray that you would make our hearts tender and able to feel with those who are suffering. God we pray that we may be men and women as was David after your own heart. We bless you for the grace and the mercy that you show toward us, help us to respond to that fully as we ought to, to love you as you love us. Amazing grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me. I once was blessed, but now am found, was blind, but now I see. I wonder if with our heads bowed and our eyes closed, if we could have the organ and piano just play through that one time, and as they do it, if there is someone here who needs to pray with someone else, to talk with someone else, you need help, I'm going to ask you to slip up out of your seat and come right here to the front, we're not going to sing, the instruments are only going to play, it will be a brief time, but it will give you an opportunity, if tonight God is speaking to your heart, to respond to him. Would you all pray that God would have His way in every life? Yes. [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music]