The Presiquential Podcast
Historically Adjacent: The Egyptian Enema
[MUSIC] I've been here the more time from Spanish about to see a C15K. >> This is a show that's now we're talking. >> Now we're talking. >> Welcome to Historically Adjacent Episode 8. I know what episode it is because we record often. We have a very strict regiment of being in the studio all the time. >> Yeah. >> I'm Blaine Zimmerman. I'm joined as always by Russ, Slivka, and Ryan Allward, who is going to kick us off tonight. >> Wow. >> With the first story. >> Wow. >> Ryan. >> Wow. >> I'll go first. >> No, no, no, I'll go. >> Are you ready? >> No, I'll gladly go. >> Do you have technology ready for it? >> I'd like to keep people on their toes. >> That's nice. Russ, I thought of you this past week because it's part of my hosting job. I went to a restaurant in Noblesville, and it's owned by a gentleman from Serbia. He's a Serbian-American, and he was like, would you like some slivovitz? And I was like, I know this plum brandy, and I thought of you, because my friend's name is Slivka, and he's like, yes, plum, yeah, a little plum, right? >> Yeah, a little plum. >> Have you ever had slivovitz? >> Yes. >> Oh, man. It is fire. >> Is that some of the stuff your father-in-law made me drink? >> No. No, he did not. >> It is fire in your chest. >> Yeah, it's rough. >> Whatever we were drinking on New Year's Eve. >> It wasn't slivovitz. >> Well, was it? >> I don't remember, but it wasn't slivovitz. >> What did you drink on New Year's Eve? >> vodka, and oh, no, no, no, it was, it was Konyak. >> Yeah, Konyak. We had a lot of that. >> So, Konyak. >> That was the worst hangover I've ever had in my time. >> I don't think I've ever had Konyak. >> Greened, I was like in my mid-30s, so they're just more pronounced, but... >> Yeah. >> Yeah, we drank a lot of Konyak that night, and... >> I had... >> Oh, shit, hurt. It hurt so much. >> It hurt so bad. >> If my brain felt like it dried. >> How does... Do you drink it meat, rocks? How do you drink it? >> No, it's like... It's a shot glass, but the shot glass had, like, a stem. >> Yeah. >> It's like a tiny little snifter. >> Yeah, it's like a little crystal... >> Uh-huh. >> A little crystal shot glass. >> It's a sipping drink. >> No, you... >> No, no, you're back. >> And, like, throughout the night, somebody will just be like, "All right, it's time." >> Yeah. >> And then they'll take a shot to a thing for the new year. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> My goals. >> I saw on Instagram that there's some proposal to do, like, a Russian to the U.S., like you could travel the... >> Bridge? >> Yeah, like a railway where you can go all the way across Russia. >> Sarah Palin can see it from her house, from her house. >> We don't understand. Keep going. >> Okay. >> Seven miles, right? >> The Bering Strait. >> Yeah, it's not very long. It's like the... >> No. >> Outside of Canada and Mexico, it's the closest country to us. >> I'm sorry. It's like you can get from London to D.C. via Russia, like, on a train. They're not building it, but someone proposed... This would be an amazing railway to get from London to D.C. to ride the train all the way across Europe, all the way across Russia, Bering Strait it, all the way down Alaska, West Coast. >> But you could just get on a plane and go from London to D.C. and five hours. >> One could? >> Yeah, but if you're retired and you're like a senior citizen, like those... >> Or like the train that we're gonna have to all get on once the, like, Snowpiercer. >> What's this? >> Snowpiercer? >> No, I don't know. >> I don't know if you've done movies, also. >> What's Snowpiercer? >> There's a TV show. I don't know if it's actually good, but the movie is fantastic. >> I don't know if the movie is... >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> I all I can think about when trains these days is the British guy. >> It's got Captain America's brother, right? >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> But the... >> Sure. >> Crazy face in the eyes. >> Uh-huh. >> Who's Captain America's brother? Like Lieutenant Canada? >> No. >> No. >> No. >> Other evidence brother. >> Oh, I understand. >> Yeah. >> Have you ever seen the... >> We've seen the train kid in the UK, who wears the gold rose. >> Oh, he's the best. >> Of course. He's like... >> He's the best. >> He got married, right? >> I'll do my best impression. He's like... >> I'm pretty sure there's a girl to a train. >> I'm standing here on the North side of the station about to see a C-150. >> It is just such pure unbridled joy. >> It's just... >> Like he's weeping. >> And it's... I literally don't watch it in a form of making fun of it. >> No. >> You genuinely feel joy watching this guy. >> You love it. Yeah, he's like... >> He loves trains so much. >> Loves him. >> Yeah. It makes him so happy. >> He's so happy. >> He is. He's just waiting for the train. He's like, "I'm here to see the C-150 come down from North Island." And the other guy's like, "Oh, that's cool." And they become buddies and he's like, "All right, bye." >> I saw some stand-up comedian recently. Remember how we just said we were going to do this efficiently? >> I was just thinking that. >> I saw the stand-up comedian recently that he had a mild form of autism, so he was in special ed growing up. >> Okay. >> And one day they showed up and they were going on a field trip, and the field trip was just to take the train downtown and to come back. And he was like, "You know how usually you send home permission slips?" >> Yeah. >> And all of this, he was like, "It wasn't like that at all." They just came into class that morning and they were like, "We're going on a field trip, we're taking the train." And everybody got excited and this kid in the back goes, "Next one leaves at 1107." >> It's amazing. Mine is not a story. Mine is a quiz. >> Okay. >> All right. >> Yeah. Super bad. >> Okay. >> So... >> My answer is seven. >> The podcast, we haven't talked about presidents in a long time. Okay. But recently, depending upon what you're listening to this, there was an assassination attempt on former President Trump and that got me thinking about stuff that we've covered in the podcast that we haven't talked about in at least a year, year and a half. And my friend Kelsey, who was standing overnight with us recently, she was asking me about presidents a week prior to that 4th of July weekend. I had about 14 beers in a very concentrated amount of time. And I was in the pool with my friends. >> Yeah. You were like, "I'm in a pool and I've had 14 beers." >> Yeah. >> And you were like, "All right, man." >> Yeah. And I was like, "So how'd you give me a present?" >> Yeah. >> You over there. >> Hey. As a president, I want to tell you something about him. Anyway. >> All right. >> Here we go. Blaine and Russ, here we go. This is not multiple choice. But here we go. This is a-- >> It's not even multiple choice. >> It's an assassination-- >> I don't think we're going to need it. I read one thing. >> There are only so many assassinations. >> But there's also attempted ones. >> Okay. >> Which I had forgotten about. >> Wrong. >> Okay, here we go. >> Jimmy Carter. >> This is our, we're going back to the presidents right now for you purists out there. >> Jody Foster. >> Which president was targeted in the first recorded assassination attempt on January 30th, 1835. 1835. I'll give you a hint. >> Nope. >> Okay. >> Hold on. [MUSIC] >> John. >> Nope. >> No. >> No. >> No. >> Not Pierce. Not Franklin. >> Nope. >> It had to be way before that. Franklin wasn't a president. >> Dude. >> Sorry, yeah. Franklin Pierce. >> Not Pierce. Not Franklin. >> I'm just saying. >> There were multiple Franklin's that were president. >> I'm going to say. >> Matter of fact, Franklin Pierce. Franklin Roosevelt. [LAUGH] >> I'm going to say this is wrong. I'm going to say Madison, but I know that's wrong. There's no way. >> 18. >> No. >> No. >> Yeah. >> You know what? >> I'm still going to say Madison. Dolly Madison. >> Yeah. >> Dolly Madison, oyster ice cream. That was Russ's guess. >> I don't have a guess. >> Andrew Jackson, a house painter named Richard Lawrence, who believed he was the- >> Because he was like slapped a gun out of his hand. >> Yeah, gosh. >> This guy believed he was the king of England, attempted the attack inside the Capitol building, two pistols misfired, prompting and rejects, and to beat him with his cane. >> Yeah. >> Here's what I'm excited about now. I'm excited about the frustration level, because I don't care at all. >> Right, right. >> The frustration level. >> I just know I should know the answers. >> I know. That's what I'm excited about. >> Okay. >> Let's do it. >> Today at Ford's Theater that the Lincolns were watching. >> Oh, my best friend wedding. >> On April 14th, 1865. >> Yeah, I'm right. It's my best friend wedding. >> Correct. No, it's sleepless in Seattle. >> [LAUGH] >> You know what's fun is- >> It's something friend, like it's friendly. >> It's very close, yeah. Our American cousin. >> Yeah. >> Oh, that's right. >> Yeah. >> Our American cousin. >> What was it about? Do we know what it was about? >> No, I don't. It was a comedy, and I can't remember when I realized this, but Lincoln died happy. >> Yeah. >> Oh, yeah, we did. We texted about. >> Yeah, he just won the war. War was over. It was easier- >> He was watching something funny. >> Yeah. >> It was probably not funny at all. >> Well, not to us. >> Not to us. >> But before the radio, yeah. >> Yeah. >> Very hilarious. Because Wilkes Booth was recognizing, or at least according to the Apple TV show Manhunt. >> Yes, which was very good on the bar that day because they were like, aren't you that dude? Aren't you? What's his name's brother? >> Yeah. Aren't you the cousin? >> Edwin Booth. >> He was more famous. >> And his dad was a famous actor too. >> Mm-hm. >> Like, he was basically like, that was one of the reasons he was so salty. >> Like Charlie Sheen. >> I mean, he would have heard something word. >> A lot of people did not know, though, there was an entire coup attempt. I mean, Seward was attacked in his home, and if it wasn't- >> He's the real hero of that show. >> Seward? >> Mm-hm. >> Right. No, it's not Seward. Seward gets attacked in his home, but who's the guy that invested? >> Edwin Stanton. >> Yeah, Stanton. >> Yeah, Stanton is the- >> Yeah, Stanton is the- >> Secretary for War, I believe. >> Yeah. Anyway, okay. >> Do, do, do, do, do, do, do. >> If this was like a Martin Sheen, Charlie Sheen, Emilio Estves scenario, would Charlie Sheen be Edwin or- >> Yes. >> No, Martin Sheen would be the dad. >> Yeah, Charlie Sheen would be Edwin. >> Charlie Sheen would be Emilio would be the younger. >> I think Emilio was the younger. >> You think Emilio would be Charlie Sheen? >> Yeah. >> Well, he really only did like three things. >> Yeah. >> Mighty Ducks, one, two, and three. >> Breakfast Club. >> Yeah. >> Oh, men at work. >> No, that works. >> No, that works. >> Mighty Ducks, one, two, and three. >> Yeah. >> Was he in West Wing? >> No. >> Charlie Sheen. >> No, Charlie Sheen. >> Martin Sheen was the president. >> He was the president. >> Okay. >> Bless. >> Okay. >> This president was fatally shot at the bolt, actually, that's wrong. This president was shot at the Baltimore and Potomac Railroad Station in Washington, D.C. on July 2nd. >> Cleveland. >> In 1981 by a man's revenge for being denied a government job. Who was the president and the assassin for bonus points? >> I remember the guy that was denied the government job because he sat outside the White House forever. >> Yeah, and then Seward had something to do with that, right? >> Mm-hmm. >> No, no, no, no. >> Because he kept asking for a job, and a couple of different times he came into the White House to ask for a job. >> Correct. >> Was it not Cleveland? >> No. >> No. >> You said it. >> Garfield. >> James Garfield. And the reason why I said the question was wrong, the president was not fatally shot, because he died, like he kind of languished for a while. >> Well, for a really long time. >> That was correct. >> He was actually the reason the air conditioning was invented. Remember? Because Edison invented air conditioning to keep the room cool while he was laying in bed. >> And then he died from, like, yeah, the X-ray. >> Yeah. >> Because he was laying on metal. >> He died essentially from sepsis because it was before they started sterilizing. >> Yeah, they were just digging in there, wound with the cleaners. >> I had the right guy. I always get Cleveland and Garfield mixed up, like, aim-wise. But I had my story right. >> I don't think you can do that. >> We did a episode of -- >> But sepsis, I bet sepsis is a metal band name. >> It's a Norwegian metal band. >> Oh, that's one that you can't read. It's just a bunch of squiggly lines, but you know it says sepsis. >> Do you remember the name of his assassin? >> Uh-huh. >> Starts with a G. His last name did. >> It wasn't... >> Chirvel. >> Chirvel. >> It wasn't the super Polish guy, because that was McKinley. >> Correct. >> And it wasn't the guy who did the air to the spoon fortune, right? You did the cult. Right? >> I don't remember that. That was the same guy. That was the McKinley guy. >> Oh, yeah. >> Because he started, like, multiple cults. >> Yeah. It was, like, a saxophone. >> He was a famous anarchist. >> No, he got kicked out of the saxophone. >> Oh, yeah. >> Yeah, he got booted out of the saxophone. >> Well, nobody wanted to have saxophone. >> So Charles Gato. >> Oh. >> Gato, yeah. >> I did a bonus. I'm sorry. >> You did. [laughter] >> All right. >> You already answered this question, but for the listener, assassinated at the Pan American Exposition in Buffalo. >> Oh, it was painted -- so it wasn't World Fair. >> The Kinwaka. >> September 6, 1901, McKinley was shot by Leon Cole Gold. >> Yeah. >> Shoulders. >> Shoulders. >> Who hit a gun under the handkerchief. >> And then African American guy tackled him. >> Yeah. >> Yes. >> Right? >> And he was like up in a mountain somewhere in the west part of the United States. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Pendergast. >> Yeah. [laughter] >> I had forgotten about this one, but here we go. This -- I'm not going to give you the year, because that might give it away. This president-elect narrowly escaped assassination, but the attack led to the death of another prominent politician. Who was the president-elect and the mayor who died? I'll give you a hint. It was like 20th century, not crazy early, pre-World War II, though. >> Wilson? >> No. Nope. >> Yes. >> It was a mayor of, like, Chicago, though, right? >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> It was a fat guy. It was a big fat guy. >> That guy -- >> The mayor was fat? >> No, no. >> The mayor was -- >> The president was fat. >> It was not a half. It was FDR. >> Oh, no. >> It would just been president-elect. Giuseppe Zangata was the -- >> That's right. >> -- would be a assassin, but Chicago mayor Anton Sermak was fatally wounded. Here we go. November 1, 1950, which president's temporary residence, Blair House, was the site of a daring daylight assassination attempt by Weboric and nationalists. >> Truman. >> It was Truman. Good job. They tried to storm it, and -- >> I said, yeah, but there was no way it was -- >> You said it was January 6th. >> It was November 1st. >> Oh, sorry. You said storm it. >> Handful more, and then we're going to move on. This president faced two assassination attempts in September 1975, both by women. >> Oh. >> Two in the same month. >> Yeah. By one of the Manson women, right? Her name was Lynette Squeakie from -- >> No, it's your guy. >> My guy. >> Ford. >> There you go. Nice, buddy. >> Yeah. >> Okay. >> The other radical leftist, Sarah Jane Moore, tried to kill Gerald Ford. They both tried and failed. >> I feel like I'm clearly winning this game. >> Who's the stepdad? >> Against all odds. I'm clearly winning. >> What movie did Hinkley see? >> Taxi driver. >> Yep. >> Yep. There you go. That was the funniest joke after this weekend was what if this was also about Jodie Foster? >> Yeah. >> What was that? >> That was the joke that -- >> A joke about this assassination. >> That's right. >> This we can be hilarious if this is also about Jodie Foster. >> Here we go. I do not remember this happening or really us discussing this. Which president was targeted on December 8th, 1994, when a man opened fire on the White House from the sidewalk aiming to, quote, "start a revolution," and, quote -- >> Clean. >> Yeah. I don't even remember that. >> I vaguely remember that, because I vaguely remember the guy's name. >> Francisco Martin Duran. >> Yeah, Duran. Yeah, yeah, yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah, like the boxer. >> Yeah. >> Roberto Duran. >> Like the band. >> He was hungry like Duran Duran. >> Duran Duran. >> Okay. These get a little bit more random, and I don't want to do that. But I do have one question for you. Do you know where the word assassin comes from? Because this was really cool. >> Is it great? >> When I dug the word. >> Assassan. >> You're not too far. >> Assassan. >> You're not too far. You're a little closer, Russ. >> Yeah, he's an H. >> So it's Arabic for ha-shah-shin. It refers to a medieval, and the zari is malle sect. I don't know what that means. They operated in the 11th and 13th centuries in the Middle East. Ha-shah-shin literally means ha-shish users or eaters. There was a legend that they consumed ha-shish to induce visions, to motivate their operatives, who undertake their visions. >> Who liked the Hitler? >> Hitler. >> Yeah, those were oh school too. >> Yeah. >> It was founded, though. >> Pum-pum-pum-pum. They had fan of names and let them go. >> In Persia, modern-day Iran, and yeah, they would kill military leaders using stealth disguise and planning to achieve their goals. Anyway. >> Ha-shah-shin. >> Ha-shah-shin. >> Like that video game. >> Assassan. >> Ha-shah-shin's creed. >> Ha-shah-shin's creed. >> I also did a little bit of a rabbit trail, what is that called? >> Rabbit trail. >> Rabbit Hole. >> Rabbit Hole. >> What's the trail? Is there a rabbit trail? >> No. >> A happy trail. >> We won't do a bonus on this because we've already discussed it in the thorough episode, but there were several leaders of other countries that I forgot about that we tried to assassinate. Can you name some of them? >> Fidel Castro. >> Like a cadastro. Yeah, yeah, Castro. >> Very random Central American country. >> Correct, yeah. >> Hitler, Castro, Lenin, Lumumba, do you remember him from Congo, Dwight Eisenhower tried to take him out? >> Did not know that. >> Thanks, Allen Dulles. >> I would assume most of these are Allen Dulles. >> JFK in 1961 tried to take out Raphael Trucute. >> Oh, they were saying. >> Oh, they were saying. >> Allen Dulles tried to take out JFK, yeah. >> We tried to take out Hussein Saddam Hussein numerous times. >> Yeah, there was also JFK that we assassinated, but yeah. >> Oh, we didn't. >> MLK. >> Oh. >> Let's go down that list of the people of the Americans that we've assassinated. >> That's not, that's not. >> This was interesting. There are two presidents who tried to take out Gaddafi. Who are they? >> Well, I would assume Clinton and Bush. >> Nixon and Carter. >> Nope, nope, nope. >> What if Carter tried to kill somebody? >> Obama? >> Obama was one. >> Yeah. >> Gaddafi just died. >> Who was the first? >> Yeah, but we didn't do it successfully. >> So if Obama, and it wasn't either Bush and Obama. >> Gaddafi died in 2011, but yes, relatively recent. >> Reagan. >> Reagan, there you go. Just an interesting, like, how far apart their presidencies were that he was still in action. >> Do you think Richard Simmons was assassinated? >> Richard Simmons of Kiss? >> No, Richard Simmons. >> No, Richard Simmons. >> That's Gene Simmons. Sorry. >> I'm sweating to the old age. >> Rios, I'm sorry. >> Yes, he died the same day as the assassination. >> He died the same day. >> Yeah. >> That's where it was buried. >> That was fun. I like that. What's the score? >> I think our listeners won. I think our listeners won, but I think Russ, I think you did come in. >> It's fine. We don't have to talk about it. >> Russ always comes in on time. >> I don't want to bring it up. >> All right. We'll be right back. Enjoy this message from one of our sponsors. >> Welcome back. Speaking of assassination attempts, Haji Ali was born into a working class family sometime between 1887 and 1892, probably in Egypt. >> Okay. What's his name? >> Haji Ali. >> Haji Ali. >> Ooh, Johnny Quest. >> He -- >> Johnny Quest's friend was -- >> He came aware as a child that he possessed an unusual gastric ability. >> Okay. >> Okay. >> He explained this to an audience in St. Mary's Hospital in Niagara Falls, New York, that while swimming in the Nile as a ten-year-old boy, he naturally discovered, he could swallow a large amount of water and blow it out like a whale spouting. >> Blow it out way there. >> Blow it out from whale's mouth. In a more dramatic version of these events provided by his daughter, Almana Ali, she stated his abilities were first learned through a single incident. While bathing in the Nile, he inadvertently swallowed a fish in an ample volume of water. Instead of dying, as those present thought he might, he simply regurgitated the liquid in the fish without ill effect. >> How much water are we talking about here? >> Assuming a lot, he learned that his regurgitation talents had the potential to entertain and earn money by the age of 15. >> Quite the capitalist. >> He said, "I tried out my tricks, first of all, in the streets, swallowing many glasses of water, then pouring forth a great fountain from one side of the road to the other. A cafe proprietor saw me doing this one day and chased me down through the street. I thought he wanted to beat me up, but no. All he did was ask to put a coin in my hand and ask me to repeat the trick. >> Cool. >> Finally, he was so delighted he asked me to come to his cafe and entertain his customers. >> Like a fountain, like one of those little cherub fountains. >> So he took his abilities on the road, and he met an Italian man in Cairo, who signed him to a contract for music hall performances. He performed all throughout Europe and sometimes for heads of state. In or about 1914, he was summoned by Nicholas II of Russia to perform at the Winter Palace in St. Petersburg. He said that the czar must have liked my performance because he awarded me a special decoration, which is now one of my most treasured possessions. Following World War I, he began managing his own affairs and toured the world, throwing up for audience. >> This seems like a real, like, like a one trick pony. >> Yeah. >> Like what does he do? >> He takes in a bunch of water. >> No, no, I would say like how do you have a show? >> Yeah. Are there dancing girls? >> He came to the United States in the 1920s. They performed at Fairs, Carnival's, and in Vaudeville. >> Who's then? >> Under the name Haji and Co. >> Mm. >> Okay. >> Yeah, like what's the show? >> What's the show? >> Just some guy. >> He's throwing up. But you do it once and then like, okay, that was cool. >> Yeah. >> Yeah, he's like, but watch this. >> He's going to be doing it again. >> Here's a small mouth bass. >> He had a variety of stage names, including the great Egyptian miracle man, the amazing regurgitator, the Egyptian inima, the human aquarium, the human volcano, and the ninth wonder of the scientific world. >> Okay. Here's what I think is happening. I think, especially human aquarium. I feel like it's not just water that he is putting into his stomach. He's putting other things to like fish and- >> It's very David Blaney. >> I think David Blaney did that. That was one of his things where he like drank a bunch of water and then- >> Yes. >> Spitted up in a frog or something. >> In a glass box elevated from a skyscraper on fire or something. >> Yeah. Haji Ali. >> He did become a naturalized US citizen. >> I feel like Haji is also a derogatory term. >> It is. >> Okay. >> Oh, it definitely is. >> Is that why you picked this? >> Because of Johnny Quest. >> Yeah. >> Because the sidekick and Johnny Quest is Haji. And- >> That's a less than- >> I've definitely heard that term used in less than toward positions. >> That's a less than Jake's song also. >> He was Judy Garlin's favorite, "Vovillian." >> Okay. >> He was more of a sideshow curiosity than true vaudeville, headliner. And at the time of his death in 1937, he had earned $1,000 a week in America. >> In 1937. Wow. >> Yeah. >> Wow. >> That's good money for throwing up fish. >> So most of his act was water spouting up to 60 to 100 glasses at a time. >> Hold on. >> Wow. >> How many, okay. How many glasses in a gallon do you think? >> So if it's an eight-ounce glass. This is a gallon 60- >> Sixty-four, right? >> So there's eight glasses. >> So- >> I forgot the original number here. >> Sixty to 100? >> Okay. So like a gallon. >> Sixty to a glass. >> No, no, no, no. Eight glasses of water is a gallon. >> In a gallon. >> Okay. >> So then- >> So that's- >> Seven to eight gallons of water, which seems like- >> All right. >> How does your stomach even do that? >> I don't know. >> I mean, it's stomach and then it's probably in his intestine. >> He would spout water in a continuous stream, sometimes approaching one minute. >> Wow. >> Can you just imagine? >> And then he did. >> I mean, I did that a few times in college. >> Yeah. >> It wasn't water. >> Wasn't on purpose. >> And yeah, I didn't want to. >> No. >> It wasn't from your mouth. >> Another trick, he would swallow 30 to 50 unshelled hazelnuts. >> There we go. >> There we go. >> And then bring them up one by one with the odd nut out produced at a mark called out by the audience. He would swallow six handkerchiefs of different hues and then reproduce them. >> Were they all based together? >> No, he would swallow the handkerchiefs and be like, "What color do you want?" And then he would bring that one up. >> Okay, this is a show. >> Yeah, now we're talking- >> Now we're talking- >> Now we're talking. >> In 1929, physician Morse Fish Bean speculated that his nut feet- >> Wait, what- >> First of all, I thought the nuts for feet, but it's F-E-A-D. >> Yeah. >> Did you say Professor Fish Bean's? >> Yeah. >> Physician Fish Bean- >> Dr. Fish Bean- >> Would, he was basically saying he was just holding him in his mouth like a squirrel. >> Okay. >> But- >> Get out of here. >> 40 to 50 of them? >> No. >> What a quack. >> Don't stop bringing that on the party. >> Don't come in, yeah. >> Yeah. >> He would also swallow live goldfish, watches, coins, costume jewelry, paper money, peach pits, stones, live mice, buttons, pool balls- >> Oh, no. >> I don't have to follow a pool ball. >> Yeah, I mean, in one standard segment, he would place eight or more lit cigarettes in his mouth. But instead of inhaling, he swallowed the smoke, and after a significant time passed, he would issue it forth like an erupting volcano. >> I don't- >> I don't understand how- >> His long-standing finale was swallowing copious amounts of water followed by a pint of kerosene. A prop was then produced typically a castle or a house made on a table, and the lighter and water. The kerosene would float above the liquid in his gut, allowing him to disgorge it first. And so there would be a drum roll, and he became the human flamethrower. So he would like set it on fire with kerosene, and then spew out the water to put it out. >> This is a show. >> That is a show. >> I feel like you answered our question in space. >> Yeah, I can see why it just like peeled out Judy Garland was like he's the best one alive. >> Yeah. >> So they would have people from the audience come up to verify that no trick was being employed. He was actually swallowing some time- >> But they reached out into his throat. >> Sometimes he was thrown to the audience during his nut swallowing trick. >> Judy Garland loved that one. >> I love this nut swallow. >> Apparently he was noted that there was not that least bit of unpleasantness, and it wasn't repulsive to watch. He was nice, and it was genteel. >> Yeah. >> Genteel nut swallowing. >> Although sometimes his act was canceled because it was killing. Sometimes the act was canceled because it would kill the supper shows. >> Oh. >> Oh. >> It was like Nancy Reagan. It was a genteel nut swallower. >> Harry Houdini once said that it was a performance that could not fail to discuss a modern audience. >> Hmm. >> Wait, Harry Houdini. >> Harry Houdini, Ken Allen, the orangutan at the San Diego Zoo. >> In 1928, the Sheboygan press had many doctors attend and thoroughly examine him during the performance. They came away satisfied that he was actually imbibing and regurgitating. >> I'm conscious, thoroughly entertaining. >> In the nagatuk daily news, physicians of three continents have puzzled over the gastronomical mechanism of his human ostrich without success. >> Wow. So, X-rays during exhibition, it was all real. He died November 5, 1937 in Wolverhampton, England of heart failure. >> Oh. >> Oh. >> I thought he would have choked on something. >> Yeah, or just like an ulcer. >> How the hell do you swallow a pool ball? >> Yeah. >> Apparently, a bunch of medical institutions offered lots of money to study a stomach. >> Yeah. >> Then it came back that nobody did and he was eventually buried. >> Wow. >> What was the guy with the hole in his stomach, remember? >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He was essentially kidnapped. >> Yeah. He sounded like a porn star. >> I can't remember his name. >> It was like Alexis St. Pierre? >> No. >> Yeah. >> It was St. Pierre. >> It was like Alexis St. John or something. >> But the guy that stuck stuff in his stomach and pulled it out was like the father of modern gastroenterology or whatever. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Playing. That's a wild story. What was his name? >> Haji Ali. >> Oh, that's right. >> Shout out to a real legend. >> Yeah. >> Wow. >> We'll be right back. >> Welcome back. We finally are at Russ and I can't wait to hear what Russ is bringing to the table tonight. >> All right. Russ. >> Tonight I'm talking about or today whenever you're listening to it this morning, Tycho Brahe. >> Yeah. Hold on. I know this. >> No, I know the name, but I don't know how. >> Power wheels. >> Power wheels. >> Yeah. Power wheels. >> What it is. >> No, go on. >> Tycho Brahe was born Tyga Addison Brahe in Denmark in 1546. >> Okay. >> Two Danish nobles, Ade Brahe and Beatty Billie. >> Beatty Billie. >> What? >> Beatty Billie. >> Beatty Billie. >> Beatty Billie. >> Running around with a pickle in their mouth. >> Beatty. >> Beatty. >> Beatty. >> Beatty Billie. >> Beatty Billie. >> Beatty Billie. >> That's my bird twitch. >> But he would latinize his name to Tycho when he was 15 years old. >> Okay. >> From Tyga to Tycho. >> Okay. >> Okay. >> That's the name of his autobiography. >> Yeah. Tycho's childless uncle, Jorgen, J-O-R-G-E-N, said Jorgen. >> Jorgen. >> Jorgen Brahe and Aunt Inger Ox Brahe kidnapped him when he was just two years old. >> Okay. >> Okay. >> They didn't have kids of their own and they stole their nephew. >> Yeah. And they were like looking after. It was like a raising Arizona type of stuff. >> Okay. Okay. >> Okay. >> But Tycho's parents, because they had like seven other kids, didn't really care. >> Okay. >> So they just let the aunt and uncle have the kid. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. They'd never tried to get him back. They didn't really complain about it. Because his aunt and uncle were like noble people, very, very wealthy. >> Okay. >> And Denmark. >> So he lucked out. >> He lucked out. >> Yeah. >> So rich, yeah. And as he grew older, they wanted him to go into law and become a lawyer. But he defied them, I guess. And because when he was 15 years old, there was a solar eclipse. And he was fascinated by the solar eclipse and decided to go into astronomy instead. >> As a young Danish nobleman. >> Yeah. It does. And he dedicated most of his life to like watching the stars and developing better astronomy equipment. And since he was super rich, when he went into astronomy, he bought everything, all the astronomy type tools. >> Yeah. >> Right. >> That's a double ball. >> Yeah. And he would go on to make the most accurate naked eye observations before the telescope. >> Mm-hm. >> The telescope wasn't invented until like 1608. And he was also very wealthy. He got into astronomy, but he was also like a playboy. >> Okay. >> He would, you know, he would play a normal astronomy like nerd. He was more of like a Neil deGrasse Tyson. >> Oh. He's like a cool nerd. >> Yeah. >> He went on podcasts. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> A lot of Rogan. You know, Rogan liked them. >> That's stupid ties though. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> So he went back to Denmark when his uncle, Jorgen, died and his uncle had died kind of in the line of duty to the crown. Apparently, the king had fallen off his horse while crossing a bridge and plummeted into the frigid moat below and Jorgen dove in and saved his life, but later contracted pneumonia and died. >> Okay. >> So, Tycho came out inheriting all of this guy's money, which was equivalent to like 1% of all the wealth in Denmark. >> Wow. Okay. >> I can do all my star things. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> He was a gift, Todd. >> He was. So, one of the unique things about Tycho was he had gotten into a argument. With another Danish noble about mathematics formula or an arithmetic formula. >> Sure. >> The TIFF escalated until the two men decided to step outside to have a sword duel. >> Oh, you want to go? >> Or sword. >> Oh, you want to go? >> You want to go? >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> So, let's go. >> Or duel outside. >> You think you're better than me? >> Brahe got his nose cut off. >> Oh, what? So we had syphilis. >> Is that what happens when you have syphilis? >> Yeah. >> Your nose cut off. And then you have syphilis? >> No, I think you have syphilis in your nose falls off. >> Well, this was cut off by a sword. >> They were wigs. >> Yeah. That's where wigs came from. Because syphilis became like such prevalent thing in like high society that people's hair was falling out. >> I thought the pharaohs had wigs. I didn't like a gym. >> Maybe they had syphilis. >> No, they had those like hats. >> Syphilis has been around for a while. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> But then, no, that's where wigs. That's why wigs became so popular in like France and England. >> I didn't know this. >> So many people had syphilis that in the high society, they would wear wigs and then it became like standard because the rich people were worried. >> I don't even think I know what syphilis does. It like attacks your brain, doesn't it? >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> It's came whatever and syphilis went crazy. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> But yeah, your nose will fall off like it's the whole thing. >> Well, he had his nose cut off by a sword and he was super wealthy. So he just went out and bought himself a prosthetic nose made out of silver and gold. >> Oh my gosh. >> Yeah. >> He had a metal nose. >> He had a metal nose. >> Yeah. >> Silver and gold nose. >> Silver and gold nose. >> Wow. >> And he would carry it around in a box along with adhesive that he would use to make it stick. >> That's my nose box. >> Yeah. >> [LAUGH] >> So otherwise he was just walking around and just bare septum. >> I don't know how often he went. >> I don't know if the Rolling Stones have a song about a nose box. >> Squeeze box. >> Squeeze box. >> I don't think it was a Rolling Stones. >> Okay. >> Mom has got a squeeze box. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Anyway. >> He's a Danish, wealthy astronomer. >> No woman. >> Who has a prosthetic nose. >> Gold silver nose. >> Okay, continue. >> Uh-huh. >> It's the who. >> It is the who. >> Yeah. >> Between. >> Like Jones. >> Right. >> LeBron James. >> Would it be like a grill now? >> It would be a version of a nose grill. >> It's a nose grill. >> It's a nose grill. >> Okay. Between his superior astronomical observations and his epic party boy lifestyle, Tycho began to make a name for himself around Europe. >> Yeah. >> He thought it might be fun to leave Denmark. >> Copenhagen. >> Denmark. >> Oh, yeah. >> Denmark. >> I kept thinking Danish. I'm like, "Where's the Danish? I'm there from Denmark." >> Yeah. >> To move to Switzerland. However, the King Frederick thought it would be a shame to lose such a national treasure. >> Can't lose metal nose guy. >> No. >> And he figured, Brahe, his own island, if he would stay in Denmark. >> What? >> Tycho. I'll give you your own island. >> He got his own island. They built him a castle for his parties. >> Did he have to subservatories? >> He's still there. >> I don't know. That's a really good question. But he would have epic parties there. And what aided in those parties was he had like a crew, like an entourage? >> A posse. >> Yeah. He had a posse. >> Yeah. >> An entourage. Court Jester. >> I love that. >> Uh-huh. So, among many employed in Brahe's castle was a dwarf, Court Jester named Jep, or Yep. >> D.J. Pocky. >> J.P.P. >> Yep. >> Yup. >> Yup. >> Yup. >> Make me laugh. >> Not a lot is known about Yep. But it is said that Brahe believed him to be clairvoyant. >> Oh, here we go. >> Uh-huh. >> Also. >> Okay. >> Blaine discovered his face with his hand. >> Also, and I can't have any follow-up questions because I don't have a lot of details about this. >> Okay, fair. >> But I read more than one article about this in the same statement was made in both, which I don't know if it makes it true. >> Yes. >> Also, Yep, the dwarf was forced to stay under the table during meals, for whatever reason. >> Food scraps. >> Well. >> So we could move the caption to the other room. >> I don't know. >> Or was it an antsy Reagan's itch? >> I think it might be. >> Oh, no. >> Yeah. >> Tycho was getting blown by his dwarf. >> Are all the guests made of? >> Oh, man. >> Oh, okay. >> That's what I assume. >> Oh. >> That's the only rational reason. >> Oh, no. >> I feel like we went really far on the jumpsick conclusions matter. >> I don't like that at all. >> Potentially. Potentially. >> Poor Jep. >> So outside of Yep is J-E-P-P, right? >> Yeah, yep. >> Yep. >> Yep. >> Naturally, logically, if it was your game, it has to be Yep. >> Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. >> When it came for him to pick a pet-- >> Oh, don't say it came for him, please. >> All right. >> When it came time for him to pick a pet, he chose an elk. You know, like-- >> He chose an elk to be a pet? >> Yeah, a big deer. Yeah. A tame elk. A tame elk who had a strong affinity for beer. >> Oh, my God. >> This is a rust story if I ever heard one. >> And since Brahe loved being the life of the party, he made it a point to show off his drunk elk whenever the other don't post it over. >> Look at him. He's wasted. >> Look at him. >> Do elks have like the big horns? >> Yeah, they've got the beer. >> And they did that bugle call, which is like-- >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> And I bet he were hanging like tinsel from it. >> Oh, yeah. >> Yep would hop up there. >> Yeah. >> Jump off. >> Yep would hop up there. >> Oh, yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah, yeah. >> That's definitely the drunk elk gig. Get my elk drunk. >> Yeah. >> He even allowed, he even allowed one of his contemporaries to borrow the elk for a party at another castle. Unfortunately. >> Uh-oh. >> It got too drunk. >> Castles have stairs. >> He drove away. >> He drove away. >> Oh, did he go up to the top and couldn't get down? >> Castles have stairs and drunk elk, like drunk people sometimes have difficulty navigating stairs. >> Uh-oh. >> I was like, well, tumbled to its death. >> Oh, no. >> Yeah. >> That's sad. >> I was inside. >> It was in the castle. >> He was hanging out of the party on the island. >> Okay. >> He was the life of the party. >> Yeah. >> Sure. >> He died. >> He was doing keg stands. It's like some dudes, holding up the elk. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> All right. >> That's definitely happened. >> Yeah. >> The antlers poking everywhere. >> Ah, crap. >> I bet, I bet yep and that elk were just like buddies. >> They were buddies. >> Yeah. >> It's like you and me, but it's like Shrek and Donkey. >> Yeah. Yeah, it's like Shrek and Donkey except... >> Yeah. >> It's like in Frozen. It's um... >> Olaf. >> Olaf and... >> Olaf and... >> No, Sven. >> Sven and Olaf. >> Sven and Kristoff. >> Yes. >> Sven and Kristoff. >> Sven's the reindeer, right? >> Sven is the reindeer. >> Okay. >> What's Kristoff? >> Kristoff is his associate, his best friend. >> Olaf is a snowman. >> Reindeers are better than people. >> I've never seen Frozen. >> Sven is really good. >> It's a really good thing. >> I like Frozen. >> Yeah. >> Not a huge fan of Frozen, too. But Frozen was really good. >> Oh, my goodness. >> Yeah, it's good. >> Yeah, it's gonna be better in Lion King, too. >> I never saw that either. >> I think Lion King, one is overrated. >> All right. >> Yeah, I'll say it. I'll say it. >> Oh, speaking of Hamlet, rumor had. >> Who was Danish? Listen. >> Yeah, go ahead. >> That was amazing. I mean, just went from Lion King to Hamlet. >> That was beautiful. That was so good. >> Rumor had at the time that Queen Sophie of Mecklenburg, Gustrow, Frederick's wife, had taken quite, who was the king at the time, had taken quite the liking to Tycho. >> Yes, quite the liking, if you know what I mean. That's what it says in my notes. >> Yes. >> I didn't mean to like it. >> Mecklenburg was a Northern German province. That's where my ancestors came from was Mecklenburg. >> In fact, some believe that it was the rumors about Tycho's infidelity with the queen that inspired William Shakespeare to write Hamlet. >> There you go. >> That's cool, right? >> Wow, that's cool. >> It just happened there. >> Full circle. >> I am from Poland. Isn't that weird? >> So he ended up in Prague, where the Emperor Rudolf II brought him on as an imperial mathematicus. What does he have him do? >> Math. >> Math. >> Hey, man. >> Just arithmetic. >> Do math all day. >> Hey, have you seen this abacus thing? >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Hey, he brought him there. >> Do the abacus thing for us. >> Do the thing. >> That math was like magic back then. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> They're like, you can see in the sky with your mirrors. >> So he brought him on do math and he gave him a castle, another one. >> Yeah, sure. >> This guy's just castle to castle. >> His metal knows this whole time. >> And I think this is why you recognize this guy's name. >> Go on. >> While there, he took on an assistant by the name of Johannes Kepler. >> There it is. >> Oh, yeah. >> There it is. >> Yeah. >> Yeah, yeah, yeah. >> Yeah, yeah. >> I did an episode on Kepler. >> You did? >> No, Copernicus. >> Copernicus, but Kepler was. >> Correct. >> While Kepler believed in a heliocentric solar system where the planets orbited the sun, Tycho was stuck on the idea that the Earth was at the center of the universe. >> Yeah. >> Much like he probably thought. >> He sounds like that type of dude. >> Yeah. >> Thought himself at the center of the universe. >> In fact, he was working on his own model, the universe, where the sun and the moon orbited Earth once a year, while all the other planets were orbiting the sun. >> Okay. Interesting. >> That means the entire soul. Okay, yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. And then they all orbited Tycho. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> And finally, in October of 1601, Tycho attended a Royal banquet where he had probably like over imbibed. >> With his elk. >> With his elk was dead. >> No, the elk was long dead. >> He was drinking in memory of. >> He poured one out for his elk. >> Probably. >> He probably like. >> He was like, you guys should have met my elk. >> God. >> You've never seen such majestic drunk elk. >> Yeah. >> Do you think yep was still alive? I bet he was. >> Yep. >> Yep. >> He's under the table. >> Ah, that's yep. >> Just Nancy Reagan and everybody. As everyone sat around the Royal table, as everyone sat around the Royal table, yep, must have been there. He was hit with the urge to relieve himself. However, it was considered bad manners at the time to excuse oneself. So he just held it until he got home. Unfortunately, that was a bit too long. His bladder ruptured, which led to a lethal bladder infection and he died. >> Jeez. >> There was- >> This died. >> There was a very prominent theory up until like the past ten years that he was poisoned. >> Oh. It's called sepsis. >> Yeah, but he was like poisoned by a royal somebody who didn't like him, like King Christian the second, I think. But then, like ten years ago, they dug up his body and did like a DNA thing and disproved it. So he did die from- >> I wonder if he was buried with his nose grill. >> He died of pee. >> With his nose grill. >> Oh, he must have been. >> He probably requested it. >> That must have been a real hassle. >> Yeah. >> Just have to keep sickening on all of them. >> Yeah. >> He had his strap on nose. >> I had a nose ring for a while. >> Yeah. >> Like a- >> Like a- >> Across the septum, not the septum, but like the lower. >> And it is terrible because there's like allergy season and I always think that when I see people with it and I always want to comment and be like, that sucks, right? >> Yeah. >> Like you think you want people to think it's cool, but it sucks. Because you have to like take it out and clean it and it's like, it really sucks. >> And you got to put it back in. >> Yeah. And then if you don't have it in, you have to put like this little metal retainer thing in there. >> That's a little bit close. >> Yeah. I mean, it doesn't stay in there real well. >> Yeah. >> You could like suck it into your brain or something. It's bad. Don't do it. Everybody. Don't get your septum pierced. >> Or don't challenge another guy to a sword duel. >> Yeah. >> And your nose stop. >> Don't get syphilis. Right? >> Don't do it, kids. >> Yeah. None of those things are ideal. >> If there's anything you learned from our podcast. >> Don't get syphilis. >> Don't get syphilis. >> Guys, thanks for listening. [laughter] >> The more you know, the less you get. Thank you for joining us. Please, if you want more of this content, you want more of these episodes made. Consider joining our Patreon community. That's in the show notes where you can also go to patreon.com/prisapointual. Thanks so much for being with us. This was really fun. We'll talk to you next week. [MUSIC]