This is the HopeCast Network. Stories and shows you actually want to listen to. Hello everyone, my name is Ashley, our post time back. And I am thrilled to announce my new podcast on the HopeCast Network, "Locks of Laughs," where I will be chatting with comedians, restaurateurs, and everyone in the entertainment industry about comedy, duh, pop culture, and of course, a little bit of food. You can follow "Locks of Laughs" on Instagram, @LocksOfLaughs podcast, and "Locks of Laughs" will be available on Spotify, iTunes, anywhere you listen to podcasts. So like, follow, subscribe, and I cannot wait to nosh with you. [MUSIC] Hi, everyone, and welcome to another episode of "Movie Torture." This here is Jonathan, and I'm here with my little buddy Brad, and producer Gary, and Bloome House Trent turning it over to Brad. I like it. [LAUGHTER] Thank you for your sweet melodic voice there, Raj. [LAUGHTER] I tell you, it is nice to be recording again. It's been a lot. Yeah, absolutely. It hasn't been a while. Nobody wants to respond to that. Well, you're the only one here that I know is on all of them, right? I don't want to just follow them. You're the only one, Roger. Roger's not here. No, I think I'm the only one that's never missed an episode. I should submit my vacation time. I'm going to take a month off of it. Do no crap movies for a while. It's in the Great White North. Yeah, actually, listeners, we haven't recorded because I actually moved the studio now, sets in Minnesota. So I'm up here. I'm away from the fellas. So this is my time to hang with the fellas and hang with you, the listeners. So the new listener, movie torture dad. You went from cheerwind to Juicy Luc. Yeah, there's a lot of Juicy Lucies up there. But I don't think MTD is in the crowd tonight. So Izzy, is he in the crowd? Roger's there. Roger's in the crowd? How come I can't see his chat? I saw one. I don't know. I don't-- Hi, Roger. I see-- There's one right before that. Roger's big timeliness. He's holding out for a bigger movie torture contract. And he said he refuses to be on camera until we pay him at least three big Macs in episode. And I'm like, no, we're going to draw a hard line at one big Mac. He's the Laveon Bell of podcast team members. Yeah, he is. But you know what? We've got a fan out there. I'm shouting him out. He's my neighbor Jacob. Listeners, we thought we had one listener, but we have two. And his name-- [LAUGHTER] And he-- I don't have any other. He's going to be joining us next week when we review another movie. He's actually going to sit in with Jonathan and I. So he could end up replacing Roger. Roger sits out. He Laveon Bell's this thing. He bow and Luke dukes it. Koi and Vance will come in. But this time, Koi and Vance will be successful. Isn't that right, Roger? He's not even typing anything back at me right now. Even sold it in with your big Mac joke. No, it's my kill shot. The big Mac joke. I bounced shortly after that. He's like, I'm not coming on. For anything less than three big Macs. He told me to sit up because you were doing a scary movie. I didn't tell him to sit out. I wanted-- He said he couldn't be here. Jonathan, he'd not say I could not do Monday. He said, but I can try to call in and listen. Yeah, Roger's overplaying this. Yeah, totally. Because we would have had Roger own if he could. Then he can join us next episode for when we record just one of the guys with Jacob. I thought I had an elders meeting. Oh, I bet that was canceled. Does it say something about our fan base that we're like? Every time we find out we have a fan, we're like, let's put him on the podcast by some flight. We're like, if you listen to the podcast, we'll put him on the podcast. That's how we met Gary. He was the one listener and we did a make a wish. Next thing you know, he's home. It's dying wish was to be a movie towards you. Like, you want to run the soundboard, Gary? You want to run the soundboard? Yeah, that's so I ended up there. It's not even a real soundboard. It's like a keyboard that's disconnected from it. [Laughter] His soundboard is a camera that moves around constantly. So you can't actually make out what his face is. It just keeps moving. Oh my gosh. We've done all this talking. We haven't even said what crapper of a movie we're doing. Yeah, let's not call it crap. I'll call it out. We watched the rage, Gary. I watched all the rage. Wait, I watched all the rage, Larry too. [Laughter] We've had a cat that joins Broadway and he's all the rage. Hello, doll. As you say, if this is Larry at the cable company, I'm gone, man. Oh my gosh. That could have been Larry. All the rage. Larry too. That voice is here. Let me be Roger. Let me do Roger real quick. The Rage Carry 2 is a 1999 American supernatural horror film. The film is the sequel to the 1976 horror film Carrie, based on the 1974 novel by the same name by Stephen King. And it serves as the second film in the Carrie franchise. They had a budget of $21 million and they had a box office of $17.8 million. They lost roughly $3.2 million. It was released on March 12, 1999, with a runtime of 105 minutes. Okay, let me... Roger says nice job here too. First, we have failed Jonathan to welcome Polum House Tran again. You know, it's good to see... I will get them. Yeah, but let's talk about how Blum is like... He only comes around. He's like the Halley's Comet of movie torture guest on here. I'm going to get every like 76 podcasts. This contract is once every six months. I'll sit in on... What has he paid? Is he getting like... He gets 20% of all of our profits from our sponsors. He does. And we do have a sponsor. You'll hear that drop somewhere in this episode. Roger says welcome back, Grandpa. Hey Roger, what's up? [Laughs] But see, Blum should get the... He should get an award because he sat up with the name of the crappiest horror movie producer of all time. We talk about this all the time. Every time he's on stage. And now I watch horror movies and put them through the lens of Jason Blum. Like, how could I bum this up? Because he's going to bum it up. It's going to be terrible. He can have blown this all up. This movie was blummed up from the beginning. Well, let's get back to Jonathan's description. He said this is a 1999 movie based on a 1977 or a sequel to a 1977 movie based on a 1974 book based on the short story from 1961, which is there an essay from... I mean, there's too many bases on this. Is that real? No, Gary. It's being... No, I'm just... Yeah, most of that's real. First off, if Hannah was here, if the first lady was here, she would be like, "Of course you did, Brad." I went to the movie theater and saw this movie. Now listen, listen, Hannah is too young for this. However, if Hannah were my age, she would have liked this movie because of Zachary Tybrian. What, I mean, Zachary Tybrian, weirdly enough, this movie was just forecasting his future. 'Cause didn't he get locked up for like beating his girlfriend at the beginning of Gris? No, he did, Jonathan. Look it up. He went to jail. He was arrested for domestic assault. Oh, if you Google him the first thing he comes up is a mugshot. He looks horrible. Yeah, he looks like a dude who's lived a hard life when really, he probably has had a silver spoon his whole life. But this movie, it's like almost... he was said, "I'm gonna be in the rage carry too, and then I'm gonna embody this guy." What a fall from being Brad Taylor. I know. Trent, did you watch Home Improvement? Yes, it is. Yeah, I liked him the toolman. That are a question. Gary, you watch Home Improvement. Oh my gosh. I know, well, yeah, I know like Al and Tim and then the neighbor, that never showed his face that was only like... Wilson. What was his name? Wilson. So I know the very basic characters. Like, I don't know the character y'all are mentioning. I've seen in a couple episodes. You would make a good Wilson, I think, Gary. You could make a good Wilson. You should just cover half your face every time we talk. Brad, you would make a good Tim Allen, but not the one from Tool Time, the one that's the drug dealer. Oh my gosh, you make a good Al Borland. I'd love to be Al Borland. Who would Trent be? Heidi. I don't know, he was going to say that. Look at this guy. Wait, was Zachary... No, Randy was Jonathan Taylor Thomas. Okay, when you're a young actor, do you have to go by three names? Is that the rule? Isn't it like Zachary Taylor Thomas? What is it? That was definitely by people in that time period. I'd like to pick a cool name. If I was going to go middle full, like first, last, first, middle, last, I'd do something really cool. There's a lot of three names, actors. There is? Yeah, James Earl Jones, Jonathan Taylor Thomas, Jerry Lee Lewis, Kevin Michael Richardson, Tommy Lee Jones. I was talking to my boss the other day, and we were in his office, and I was like, "What's the guy's name over there?" And he goes, "His chance Michael Michaels." And I was like, "Oh my gosh." I said, "That's a power name." He goes, "You know where that's from, right?" It's like, "What movies that from?" And he's like, "Blades of glory." "Blades of glory, yeah." Yeah, that's awesome. Chance Michael Michaels. I just like how he dropped the chance Michael Michaels all meet casually, as if it was nothing. I just laughed like, "Okay, yeah, I got you, man. That's cool." That is a cool name, though. You got to come over with a cool name, like Brad Michael Michaels. I just stole Chance Benolo. Movie torture, Brad. Boom. How you going? Three names. Blump house tricking. Your first name's going to be a movie. Middle name's torture. Your first name is producing. Jonathan's just Jonathan. He's like the sheriff movie torture. That's right. Heater Jay. Okay, let's get into this crappy movie, because one, I've never seen this actress before, in anything ever after this or before it. Really? Uh, what has she been in? Roger Grump Edwards? Oh, I like that. He just blasted his whole name on there. Is that his real name? That's not his real name listeners. That's his fake name. He's a big Prince Edward friend. Let's see. Ooh, she had a recurring role. Francie Jarvis on Gilmore Girls, who I know you're a big fan, Brad. Yeah, if I had like a... I would do that sound effect right now, because that shows the worst. You know what we should do? We should get rid of movie torture. And we should just do a Gilmore Girl episode from Guy's Perspectives and make fun. That would probably be pretty funny, honestly. I watch the entire series and I don't hate it. I'm just going to be honest with you. Oh my gosh. I can't, they talk too fast. Trina, have you ever watched it? No, Lily watches it like all the time. She re-watched the entire series the other day. I'm no desire. I don't understand the love. It's weird. My wife is a Gilmore Girl's fanatic. Yeah. Like, I love you. You hosted a fantasy football league one year that it was, wait a minute, maybe it was Netflix show theme. I was thinking it was Gilmore Girls. I'm the one who was Gilmore Girl named, never mind. That was all I'm making. Gilmore Girls, I don't like Gilmore Girls. If I'm watching Netflix, it's better called Saul, or it's Breaking Bad. It ain't Gilmore Girls. What's the name of the town they live in? Stars Hollow. Yeah, I was the Stars Hollow. How do I know, why do I know the name of their town? 'Cause they're a fan, they didn't know that. I'm not a fan. My wife hates this, though. I dropped this all the time. What's the name? Rory and Lorelott. You have a question about the Gilmore Girls. I can't read what Roger Rook. One more thing. Jason, Kevin Smith movies. What's his name? That was in that show. Wait, what do you mean? There's somebody from the Kevin and Smith movies in Gilmore Girls? Jason? No. Must be thinking of something else. I'm thinking about something. No. All right. Anyway, sad. Well, let me just say this for a bit. My wife, I like to irk my wife because she is the hugest Gilmore Girls fan. And before we got married, I was out in California. I took a tour of the Warner Brothers backlot. And I got to go on the set of the Gilmore Girls. And it bothers her that I got to see everything. Like, I said at their dinner table. And I was like, this is pretty cool. Saw all their, you know, saw Harvard on the backlot. And she's like, that brings me so much for him. Yeah, I can bring it. That's why she tells me all the time. When was this? This was years before I married my wife. I was out in California and they were like, we're now going on the set of the Gilmore Girls. And I'm like, I don't know what their chicks here. Like, what's going on? And they're like, this is a movie. This is a TV show on the WB. It's a brand new show. Could be really good. And I'm like, I don't know anything about this show. But I was in their living room and by their dinner table. That is hilarious. Yeah, I ain't watching this show. And then my wife has tried to get me to. But she ain't converting me, man. She's not converting me. I refuse. I will not be converted. Anyway, back to this movie. So you want me to give me, you want me to give a quick synopsis on the rage really fast. Let's get it. Okay. Girl has powers. Girl's friend jumps off school. Girl gets angry. Cool guy likes girl. Cool guys make fun of girl. Girl gets angry. Goes to house party where she's tricked. Goes crazy. Everyone dies. And she ends up dying. Think. And get into the movie. That's it. It is worth it. That was crazy. It's crazy. It's carry one. It's like, hey, it's like if somebody was like, you know what? We need to make a sequel to movie torture. Let's get four guys in. And they'll just talk about movies. And we'll call one horror fan, Trent. It's just like, we'll change the names, but we'll bring Amy Irving back from the original Carrie, but we're going to kill her man. Like she's going to get it through a door. And we're going to show scenes of Sissy Spencer. Ballway. Cause it means like. I know. Oh, she's there. Where are you going to say? I was going to say I read that the film wasn't actually even meant to be a sequel and it was first written. That it was meant to just be its own standalone movie. It sucks so bad. They tried to force it into Carrie universe. Okay. Carrie did not need a sequel. Am I right about that? No. That was movies you're like, you've seen it. You don't need a sequel. You're like, okay, Sissy's basic grade in it. She gets made fun of. She gets blood dropped on her. I mean, that's the thing, man. But are we to believe that Amy Irving is, is she supposed to be the lumus of this movie? The Doctor lumus is. Is she supposed to be the one that understands Michael? Yes. Like Carrie, she's twisted. No, you know, it's a connection. She's she's terrible in this movie though. Like Amy Irving brings not like she's whatever charm she had in the original Carrie. She doesn't bring this movie at all. There's the only thing going for this movie. Is it was filmed in Dallas, North Carolina? I mean, that's the only thing. It's called Gaston. That's North Gaston High School. Yeah. Shut up. You didn't know that? That's their neck. Well, how would I know that? That's crazy. Yeah. So I looked this up. This isn't me knowing that the name of the high school in the movie is Bates High School, which was a nod to Norman Bates from Psycho. Right. I love how I actually read I read the credits and it said in the credits, I think it said a thank you to Gaston High School. Oh my god. That is so very interesting. It didn't even put North Gast. Is it a thank you to Gaston High School? He couldn't even get the name right. That's so they're like, we really don't even care. Is this movie sucks so bad? Nobody's going to watch it except Brad. He'll pay because he pays to see them all. You're a pump that it was filmed in Gaston County. You're like, I'm going to see it. I know. I think I think movie torture dad clued me in on that. He was he called me when I was out in the name. He's like, hey, man, you got to go see that movie. It's filmed in really North Gaston, man. Yeah, see it. And I'm like, OK, well, I guess I'll go watch it. And well, there was there a carry that come out in 2013. Yeah, they remade it. I didn't see it. But I know I think they redid like that was when they were read. They were redoing all the old stuff like, you know, when they were redoing all the old horror movies, like they redid Halloween and all that kind of stuff. But Rob Jones could have helped this one actually. Oh, this movie would have been so much better if Rob Zombie had directed this movie. Oh, my gosh. Real killings and stuff out of inspiration. This movie had no this movie was so slow and boring. There was hardly any. Was there any horror in this movie trip? No, and it was also predictable that nothing scared you about it at all. So are we are we to believe that this girl, the American beauty girl, that's got the girl from American Beauty. I think she's riding that American Beauty high. So I guess the beauty of that point or was she American pie, which came first? Both before this. So we're to believe the producers are like, hey, American beauty girl, we got you a movie. This is going to be a star. You're going to come in. You're going to you're going to spend two minutes and you're going to jump off a building. And that's it. And I mean, they wasted this character. She would have been a better rage carry to. And I've never been a fan of hers. I don't like her inner movies. She was she was the worst part of American pie, by the way, in my opinion. It's not great. But I mean, she just setting up the story though, too. That was, you know, I mean, to supposedly the best friend. And you didn't really know anything about it. And then she crashed into that park. That's something you knew it was yeah. Yeah. And they had matching tats that they showed on the school bus. I mean, Gary and I have matching tats. We got matching tats before I move. This is like the stereotypical movie, y'all are hilarious, where they make it out like what high school is this brutal? Like these kids are so unchanged that they're doing crazy stuff. Like what they're doing in this movie. I mean, this is called Columbine. Yeah, they run around like everything is like, they can do whatever they want to do. And it's like no administration. And it's just, it was just totally unbelievable. There are a bunch of frat kids is basically what there are, but they're 15 and 16 years old. But they all look, they all look 35. Like they all were 20. They're the oldest high school kids I've ever seen, man. It's I think some of them had gray hair, man. It's like, like, I don't understand why do you have to be so brutal? Like they were brutal. I know those kids needed like a male figure to beat the brakes off of them. Yeah, there's definitely no bad. That's it, right? Yeah, D.A. was Robert D. Rayford from Jambalyn Millie. That was? Yes. He was the D.A. He didn't open up a whole camera. You know what I want him with that. Was this the only movie he was in? I mean, was this his last movie? Because if I got to go out on the rage, man, that's a terrible way to clock out. Like, I don't know, he's been going wild at. I think it's the only movie I've ever heard of him doing. And I know he was it until I started watching it. If this was not a Carrie movie, would this movie be better? Because you don't have the expectations. Hmm? No, if they just said this isn't going to be a Carrie sequel, it's just going to be a scary movie. It'll light on the scared. He was still then compared. It was still close. They needed to have some odd stories of her using her telekinesis to wreak some havoc. Not just like she slammed the window on the dude's hand and then the crescendo at the high school at the end. That's pretty much it. We need to see her doing some shenanigans, right? Like some fun stuff. Like, you know, have a montage of her going around town, like blasting some tires and like making the toilets explode. The guy goes up in the sky. Like, whoa! See, that would have been the best, right? We don't get any, there is no humor in this movie. I mean, this movie anymore suicide within three minutes, right? Do you think American pie girl read the script and was like, I got to kill myself, man. Like, this is, I got to die in this movie. Like, I can't make it, there's no way I make it. I'm going to stay in on North Gaston or Gaston High, not North Gaston High. And I'm going to jump out of this movie. She was actually the smartest one in the movie. She's like, I'm out of here, man. Like, there's no way I'm sticking around. You got out of the first five minutes. She was the genius of a group. Yeah, and it's all over it. What was funny is she like just held her virginity. And I guess, and this guy like took it. And that's why she killed herself. Cause she knew he didn't like her. How many men do that to girls? Probably a ton. I'd be like, get some thick skin, man. You made a bad decision. Don't be, don't be proud of yourself, but don't go kill yourself, right? Why didn't you throw him him off the roof? That would have been great. Okay, can we have seen like, like Carrie? She wasn't even named Carrie. What was her name? It wasn't even Carrie. It's not Carrie. What did it aim for? That's true. That's Carrie in the rage. Angela. Yeah, Angela. She was Carrie's half sister. That's how they did it. That's how I just really didn't die. And she was just like, half sister saying that. Yeah. Oh my gosh. That was a strange thing. Those two scenes that I have to bring up, the first is the scene in the football film room when the coach tells the kid to drop his drawers. It wasn't happening in real life. No high school football coaches doing that. I would be mad if Max came home and said, "Dad, coach Gary made me drop my drawers." Like, I would not like that. Dude, I would, as a dad, I would have to kill him. That would be the only suitable response. Why was he making him drop his drawers? Because he said he was, well, he made a pretty derogatory joke about how he played at the football game. Oh, yeah. He wanted to drop and see if he was a girl or not. Yeah, basically. Hi, Josh. Could you imagine? He would be canceled so fast today. Like, he would be fired quicker than the one, our one listener. Maybe torture dad could hit play on this podcast. Right. They tried to do that. They tried to do like it. What was that football game, things like Friday night, live for those type of things? What was that show that, or with the football team? Oh, you're talking about varsity blues? Varsity blues, were they shaved their hand? They're trying to act like that. They're trying to be like this huge jock team. And I, like that, that's what it was. I gotta say, man, if I came in and I was like, they're like, Hey, Brad, you better shave your head. I'd be like, no, I'm getting in. I don't think he's gonna go back. The well went to come back. I'm just kidding. I don't have to shave them all day, right? I'm not touching the locks. Gary has luscious locks. Gary's got the hair, man. Gary's got the best podcast by a long shot. Did he always wear his hands? He has much of the way of hair. I'm not too serious, man. I'm talking about amongst the men, yes. Amongst the men, he's got the best head of hair of all of us. Roger would sacrifice a Big Mac, just for a little bit of Gary's hair. Did Roger fall asleep? He hasn't commented all lately. Gary's the baiting in the chat. I'm baiting. I'm giving the old bait. Okay, I know I just interrupted a great conversation, but my name is Brad and you may be listening to me or any of the other talent we have on this network at Hopecast. We want to thank you for listening, but also we want you to like and subscribe to the show you're listening to. So when you're done listening, go on the iTunes or the Spotify and leave a great review if you like it and follow the show on Instagram and any other platforms that it's on. I think we're on TikTok, so follow us on TikTok. But make sure you leave us a review. We love good reviews here at the Hopecast Network. Now, I guess I'll let you get back to your show. I hate to interrupt what you're doing now, but something very important I need to let you know about. 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Thank you, and back to our scheduled podcast. I'm here, man, doesn't he? He probably fell asleep because rage carry too. It's such a funny name for a movie, man. It's like, it's like going, uh, uh, galactic Star Wars 3, and it's like none of Star Wars people in at all. It's like Transformers starring Voltron, hmm? The only-- the best part was when he started killing everybody in the last literal five minutes of the movie. That was the only part was he-- That was it! That was the only part of the movie, yeah. You could-- you could literally just fast forward to that party and get taught in it. And then just be completely fine. 'Cause-- 'cause you're like following Amy Irving. What's her name in the movie? Is it Sue? What is it? I can't remember. Oh, Sue. Is it Sue? You're following her. You're thinking, man, this would be great if she gets a showdown with Carrie. And she just gets killed in a door. Like, that's it, man. That's all I remember. She's got a 1A. Yeah, she just was there. Like, why did she agree to come back for this movie? Like, I would have been like, "No, I'm good." Like, I don't understand that. Like, for one, you can't even count this as a sequel to Carrie. I refuse to say it's a sequel to Carrie. Man, it's strange. It's just-- you can't do it. You can't do it. There is no way this is sequel. This would have been better, Jonathan, if... if she had telekinetic powers like science fiction. Like, something had, an Aimean had came into her body. And she was like, you know, a freak. That would have been better. Don't you think? Yes. He just had one word. Yes. Yes. Yes. Look at that real ending tattoo though. That made it-- that doesn't keep with anything more than the-- because she has telekinesis. But why does her tattoo spend all over, right? And they go fine all over. That didn't make any sense off. Yeah, that was weird. I think that's back in those golf times, man. Back when they did that kind of stuff. What about the heartbeat in your arm whenever she started getting angry? Oh, my gosh. I could think. Who has a pulse in their arm, man? In the tattoo. Just at the tattoo, man. Like, if I-- Okay, if I get a tattoo on my arm that will heartbeat, I'm gonna get like an actual heart and freak people out. Like a tattoo at heart and just go boom boom boom. If I could-- If I had-- Hell, in Kinesis, I had throw people around. I wouldn't-- I wouldn't-- Wait, I got mad. I'm just throwing around and doing it everywhere. Like throwing people and saying something and breaking that. I mean, I would use it all without. Oh, my gosh, man. I would go around and like wedgie people with my mind. Like, those guys would-- those guys would have been killed like halfway through the movie. They were so discreet. They're the end to kill them all, right? I mean, I'm a taking chair on one of the first three seconds. I had to look this up, though. This was Jason London, right? That's the guy that was-- had the semi-heart for it, right? His brother-- What's his brother's name? His brother is a London also. They're like twins. Do we know his brother's name? Gary, do you know it? In real life? Yeah, yeah, he's got a twin brother. I can't even think of who. Jason London's brother's Jeremy London. Yeah, they're like twins, man. They look a lot like-- I had to look it up. Jeremy London, he fits right in with movie torture. He gets arrested with a DUI. This is 2013, so we're going back 11 years at this point. He gets arrested DUI, gets in the cop car, takes a dump in the cop car, like full on poop sale, man. Like right there in the back of the cop car. Is that a power move, by the way? Like, you're like, I know I'm going to jail. I'm just going to crap myself, man. I don't care. You're going to go all out, right? If you type his brother in, hold on. What's the adult version of a kid pooping in a ball pit? It is, man. You type in Jeremy London poop. Oh, his mugshot. Oh, my gosh. Y'all got to see this, man. Listeners, go type him in if you want. Jeremy London, wow. It's about right. And he looks like the right guy to poop in the back of the cop car. Oh, he was involved, right? Yeah, he pooped in squad car, deer in arrest. Mugshot is his days is confused. He was a dazing confused too, as what he told cops. It poops his pants and says the craziest things ever. Oh, gosh, we got to listen to what he said. He said, where are we at? Oh, my gosh. We got to hear what he said. He allegedly pooped his pants and said the craziest things ever. Here's what the report said. 40-year-old Jason was thrown out of the bar. This says Jason. Jason London is the one. Wait, which one do we watch? Jeremy or Jason? What's the other thing? Jason London. We must have watched Jason. We watched the one that pooped in his pants. Yes. Here's the one, bro. Jason London was in this one. So we watched Jason do it, not Jeremy. Okay. Jason uttered, guess what, F word? No, what it looks like. It's the same person. They basically are. I love this. I own you guys so hard. I'm rich. I'm an actor. Look me. Then he says, it smells like poop in your car. And your breast smells like diarrhea. Of course. He then was leading to the left and crapped his pants. He said, I told you, I'm happy. I like the lead to the left move though. It's kind of like you're like, okay. This is from the east, IdahoNews.com. This is the headline. Jason London arrested after bar fight allegedly poops in cop's car. How do you allegedly poop in someone's car? I mean, there's either poop or there's not poop, right? Yeah. This is pretty a brown cut. I thought we were looking at his brother. I thought his brother, it's Jason, the one we saw in the movie. Oh my gosh, man. So the second thing that wanted to bring up is the new climax of the movie. Zachary Tybrian and his buddy in the world get the spears or the, what are they called? The guns, the harpoons. And they're backed up to the pool and Angela pops the girl's glasses, which like explodes into her eyes. And then she turns around, carpoons, Zachary Tybrian, right in the junk, which goes through him into the pool. That was a good, that was, he deserved that though, right? Yeah, yeah. Oh, he was. I mean, I mean, he deserved that. Of all the people he deserved in this movie. He was, was the one guy from entourage? Is that the guy from entourage? Yes. He was mean. Like, I, these guys were, for 17 year olds, they were psychotic. Like, they were evil for kids, right? I mean, like, what are they watching at home? They must have been watching a bunch of Blumhouse movies and we're just totally bored. They watched him and they made him so mad. They turned evil. They watched that night swim and they're like, yeah, I got to do something, man. This is terrifying. It makes a nice life miserable now. My life is miserable because I'm watching night swim. How is these harpoons? I'm not going to go to the RV. I'm still amazed that that's Jason London that pooped. I thought it was Jeremy London. I'm so, I'm so shocked that he pooped himself. He's like, you don't know where I am. I did carry in two of you, okay? Oh, oh, he should have dropped that line. And they would be like, oh dude, if he had dropped, I was in the carry too. You should watch it. That'd have been the best line of all, by the way. If he dropped, I'm in the rage carry too. Man. They're like, what? What? Think if he's going to drop a movie, he would say, days and confused with Matthew McConaughey. I would probably say that. Mall rats were shannd already. One or the two, right? I'm certainly left out very too. What, we didn't even bring this up. There's another American pie, American pie alum in this movie. Like, they must have went to the set of American pie and said, well, let's, let's make this happen. Let's have a Stiffler's mom. That's right. Fitch, Fitch is in this movie, I mean, he is so wasted in this movie, by the way. Like, he's a funny dude, but they do not use him right. Everyone Fitch was like in all these movies at one time, and now he's probably nothing. He's probably, he's probably working at the Dollar General. He's mad because Big Lots is going out of business. What is Fitch doing these days? I don't know, but another like notable actress was the girl from Clueless, the one that got killed at the end. Oh, you're talking about Clueless, the TV show, not the movie, right? Yes, I mean, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, what's her name, Rachel Blanchard? Sounds right, I don't know. Yeah, I think they're making a new American pie movie, by the way. So, well, they got a new one. They're going to make a new one with the OGs. So American Reunion came out, oh, when did that movie come out? I'm looking. American Reunion came out 2012, and I had been married to my beautiful wife for like two years, and I was like, "Honey, we got to go see American Reunion." I've seen every American pie in the theater. We're going to go see American Reunion. She's like, "Okay, Brian, I don't like a lot of what?" So, we're sitting there, and we're probably three quarters in, and I got to take a dump. I'm like, I got to take a dump, man, and I ain't using it at the movie. It's going to be a cop car. Did you go to a cop car? That's what I call my car, because I feel arrested in an all the time. So, I'm like, "I got to take a dump." And she's like, "Look at the bathroom, Brian." And I'm like, "No, this is more of a long-term situation here. I can't go to the theater and just relax." And so, we got up. I said, "We got to go home. We got to leave the movies." So, three quarters into American Reunion left it. Went home, had a really good number two. Never saw the end of American Reunion, so I've never seen the end of it. But anyway, that's my American album. Now, the world knows. But, back in the day, listeners Hannah would not know this. You might remember this. Back in the day, back in the 90s, movies used to do sneak previews. Do you remember those? No. Like, two weeks before it comes out, you could go see it. Well, there was a sneak preview in the movie theater when I was out in California. And I was like, "Let's go." And I'm like, "What movie is this?" They're like, "It's called American Pie." And I'm like, "I don't know anything about it." And they said, "Well, let's just watch it and see what it is. Nobody knew anything about this movie." And literally, we laughed the whole time. Like, that movie is funny from start to finish. I would imagine it still holds up today. Yeah, it was good. They should make a remake of it. I mean, they could be American senior citizens. His name is Eddie K. Thomas, by the way. He's got American senior citizens. They could all be at a nursing home. As we'll say, it could be a nurse at all, all right. And remember, remember, they'll edit this out of our podcast. But, um, remember the preview always had this song? Welcome to the summer of '98. When you wanted a girlfriend, and you only had a pie. I like how we're talking about American Pie, man. I'm not even this young man. And we've actually watched a lot. Wait, oh wait, I'm looking at it. I was about to say this guy was in the movie too, but I'm looking at the American Pie cast. I was like, he's coming me back in the red each. Well, I was looking and they have the girl, Mina Cervari, and Eddie K. Thomas beside each other on the cast. I was like, oh my gosh, Terry Reed was in the rage and I missed it. Eddie K. Thomas is now 44 years old. Oh my gosh, man, that's how old this is. He hasn't done anything in a long time. It's been any good. Nothing. Do you think he sits at home and goes, remember when I was in, uh, the rage carry too? I doubt it. I bet he can't. I bet he caches those checks though. All three hours work. I like Jonathan's post here. I'll answer that all fair. Anything else about this movie, man? Anything else we want to add to this? I didn't hate it. I didn't think it was terrible. So y'all can. We hadn't asked you that yet, Jonathan. You're jumping down, man. You keep saying it's trash. I'm just speaking up for the movie. Okay, give me, read a couple Amazon reviews here that we got. For people that Amazon five stars. There's five stars. There's definitely five stars. I like this guy. This is from 2013. What's the rage about? What's all the rage about? I like this. I must start off by saying I'm a huge horror fan. I'm also a huge fan of the original Carrie. Ironically, I'm not a fan of the original Carrie. I don't even think it's that good. No. As a horror fan, I believe this film delivers in so many ways. Is that a paid review? I'll say that I don't really categorize it as horror. I like it's not a scary movie at all. It's really a teenage movie from the like, like it used to be the 90s with a little, you know. With nothing. So I got it. Butterball says, I like that name Butterball. Now, I moved up here to Minnesota. I was at my staff meeting today and coworker goes, "Well, you're from the south. Y'all eat butter." And I said, "Yeah, you're right. I just go home and I say, Kristen, pass me that dark butter. I'm just going to eat me a few pieces of that right now." I said, "I just slurp it up. I'm drenched in butter." Butterball says, "I saw this movie on television and I was instantly hooked." Now, if you're watching this on television, you're missing probably the spear knocking his groin out. You're missing probably the best parts. Yeah, I love the first one and normally sequels mess it up, but not this time. This is a sequel. This is not a sequel, Butterball. I mean, it's not. There's no way this is not a sequel. This person, Jamie Moore, Jamie Moore, Gary had been written this man. It says, "A worthy sequel to the 1976 class." This is not a, why do these people can say? Jonathan, this is not a sequel, right? No, it's not. This is about as much a sequel as Catty Shack 2 is a sequel. Like, you can't ditch the whole cast and bring back one guy and say, "This is a sequel." They didn't even have specific in it. Like, didn't they flashback to her one time, but that was just like a scene from the original movie. Yeah, I'd rather that she did not want to appear in the ask or two, but she gave her permission to put some stock photos from the first one. I bet she wishes she had never done that now. Yeah, how much do you think they paid her to use her stock footage? The bulk of that, um, that budget that they, boy, that's what it is. They backed that Loomis Fargo truck up your driveway. It said, "Here you go, Miss Spasic. You can have all your wool." In North Gaston, like 20 bucks and then they gave her the rest. Gaston, it's not North, it's Gaston. Gaston school, right? Gaston High School. Who do you think somebody was actually on top? They just thought it was dummy over that looked like the American pie girl. And then I kept thinking, what high school has gardening on top? Like, is this a class? Are they like... Who would allow that to even be a thing where that could even have never? It's like when I'm in a hotel room, I don't know about you guys. When I'm in a hotel room and I'm up high, I always try to open the window, but you never can, right? Like, they don't let you. Yeah, in Boston that time. Remember we could open the window? I was in Boston. We did, didn't we? Yeah, you could open all the windows up in there. Yeah. Because we're like, man, there's probably been some jumpers. Yeah, 'cause it was pretty hot. But most time you can't open windows anymore. They keep them windows a lot. Oh yeah. Yeah. It's a little bit of that one in the North Gaston. I'm there in the North Gaston. I'm going to ask her if she was in the gardening club on the roof. You should ask her, yeah. Ask her if she's in the gardening club. And I'm getting my bullies mixed up, 'cause I got another movie with another bully coming up. But these guys were the worst. Like, as far as bully levels go, what do you rank these guys? They're a solid eight and a half. I am. Oh yeah. I don't know. They might be even higher. They're the worst of the worst. Where would Gary have been in this movie? What did I get for showing up to the podcast? Gary would have been delivering pizza to the massacre park. No, no, no. This is my honest. I think Gary would have been, what's his name? Jason. What's his face? That he was in London? The nice guy? He was a nice dude. And I did think he was very odd at the end after she killed everybody. He still wanted to kiss her. It's like, I know you just murdered everyone, but he was a massive murderer. But hey, you know, the places burned into the ground. But he feels like I'm graduating class, but I'm just going to be serious with kissy, please. Maybe he just hated his teammates. That's nice, that he's probably all dead. He's like, well, now I get to be valedictorian. My plan. I am now the smartest man alive. It just goes to the men. Men do not care, right? Like, we will want to make out regardless of the situation. I don't know if my wife just felt like a whole auditorium worth the people out there that I'm kissing on. What if she did it with a, you know, what if she shot a gun and then she blew the smoke, like dirty hair that beat? And then they're like, come here, Kristen. I love the smoke. That's a good question. No, let me do a drown though. That was pretty funny. He had it coming. Yeah, but I would rather seen him get his crotch blown away. I don't know. What's the name? I mean, aspirin and drown was pretty cool. And that was the one saving grace, the movie. Yeah, that is. Yeah. But a guy like him, why didn't he carry a knife with him? He looks like the kind of guy that had a knife on him. Yeah, because they're tough guys, right? You think you'd have something? Always think it's funny when I'm around people and they're like, hey, Brad, you got a knife. I'm like, I'll click a knife guy. I don't have a knife. Yeah, I just can't blame the way I go. Trent's seen me with a knife. It's not a good sign. I'll tell you the knife and blood along with it. Yeah, I cut myself. I get that a lot though. Hey, Brad, you got a knife. I can use men and like, come on now. Seriously, are you making fun of me? Like, what's happening here? Okay, Blumhouse Grant, a movie torture, movie gold. A movie torture, just sheer torture. No, no. Jonathan, we already heard you, but go ahead and say it again, man. Oh, you're bronzing it. The way you were, dude, you were carrying, you were raging up, man. You were like, I was thinking you were going to go movie gold. They just say gold. I was going to say, if you say movie gold, you need to watch more movies. I just don't think it was horrible. Okay, I'm going to go ahead and get to me. This is movie torture, first off. This is definitely top 10 worst we've ever watched on here. By a mile, like it's in my top 10. It's bad. Dude, the hunt is better than this. Halloween ends is better than this. At least you got that crazy dork guy getting bullied by the band. This you got-- At least the marching band was like, it was original. That never happened. This you just got normal bullies that are cool. For no apparent reason, like, for one, Angela wasn't even like, like, the worst looking girl in the school. You'd have thought that she was like, a booger face or something, man. Like, she was terrible. She had boogers and sids. Like, she was not bad, man. Why were they so mean to this girl? We didn't even address her foster dad. And he's like, what are we going to do with that? We need to paycheck. I'm like, oh my gosh, man. This poor girl, like, they've only got her living there. So he can get the monthly check. And I've fostered, and let me tell you, the monthly check is, you don't do it for the money because it's way more expensive. If he's living on her check, he's broke. Well, you didn't seem to have much character anyway, right? No, but we're supposed to like, hate this guy, but we don't even know him. Like, that's the problem. They don't let you-- They took her away from home from her mom, and they never set up to these people where she was given to you. It was just since she's there. Yeah, she's just there. Like, they don't set any of these characters up. They do not make you care about anyone that's moving. No, they feel nobody. There's nobody. They all could have took spears to the joint, to the junk, and none of us would have cared. Okay, this is a movie. This is definitely a movie. The best character. The dog was the altar of the dog with the best character. I was glad he lived. He was the only person I was disappointed in, and he got run over. That's the only time he showed emotion. That's one of my crimes. The entire movie was when the dog got hit. Blumhouse would have made this somehow worse, though, right, Trent? Yeah, he probably would have. Let's see. What have you done to it? How'd y'all think a way could have made it worse? It would have been a prep school, and there would have been like, a villain would have been a Megan Dot running around probably. It was the football players who were in the margin, man. The football players would have been he-homes and they-the-homes, and he would have, he would have pronoun this whole movie, I'm sure. Just to be woke. Anyway, what a movie, man. I never want to watch this again, Jonathan. I never want to watch this again. And if you, if people watch this and are like, I think I want to go, this would make me not want to watch it. In a Carrie movie, honestly. This ruined my Carrie love. Like, I'd be like, yeah, I don't even care to see Carrie anymore. I'm good. So anyway, for Blumhouse, Trent, for producer, Gary, for my good buddy, Jonathan, for heater, Jay. My name is Brad. We will see you next week. See ya. Oh, movie, movie torture. [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music]
