Journey to Truth
Rebecca Rose presentation at the Secret Space Conference (5/5/22, Grafton, IL)
[APPLAUSE] Wow. I came in early, so I would have a chance to sit in front of the MTCs and get used to being in this position. I was so nervous yesterday. I was fine the whole week, and then I really got kind of worked up last night this morning. So it's good we're starting. I am going to start us with a guided meditation. So I put my chair here. I know everybody's been listening really a lot this week, and we're all taking in lots of information, and probably a little overwhelmed, or maybe just processing a lot. Yeah, I see some knots. Can everybody hear me pretty well in the back? [INAUDIBLE] Yeah, OK. Yeah, so just to acknowledge that, let's have some-- I'm just going to give us a few minutes to be together in a little different way, and maybe a more embodied way. All the listening up here, and all of the chatter in the mind, and so much simulation from all of us being around so many more people than we're used to, I would imagine, for myself, certainly. Yeah, so just have some breath here. And if it feels good, maybe close your eyes. And yeah, I need this too. Yeah, let's be together in this beautiful container that Tyler and Aaron and the Lodge and all of us have created together in this space where we can maybe come closer to our own authentic expression of self. I think so often we feel isolated, and we can't share our stories, and we can't share who we are. So this is pretty powerful, not just for me. I'd rather be sitting where you are, but for all of us to create this together. So just maybe, yeah, have some inhale and exhale, and just be with yourself, and whatever you might be alive at the moment, whether it's confusing or clear, it doesn't really matter. Just let the wafting in of your own experience be welcome, no matter what it is. And yeah, maybe feel your feet and the seat and your tailbone and the connection to the land and the beautiful, the elemental world that we are here with and the native world that I've been feeling so strongly. Native people have been with me all week in the etheric form, so I'm really giving thanks to that presence too here. And yeah, if it feels good to you, you can place your awareness in the cosmic gateway above your head as you breathe, welcoming yourself home in a maybe different way. You might imagine or feel or sense or know a bath of light coming down through the crown of your head, and let that just move like liquid nectar through you from head to toe, moving through your third eye and your skull bathing your brain. And the base of the skull, the occiput, the chakra there, maybe softening the face and yeah, have a breath there, jaw through your throat and your shoulders maybe lightening their load a little bit. Any heavy internal lifting you've been doing is a result of things that might be waking up inside of you or interactions you've been having, maybe softening. Softening the musculature of your body a little bit if you like, and then down through your arms and hands, joints, your back, softening the musculature along your spine and perhaps illuminating with your awareness the central channel of light along your spine, central vehicle for your whole light being, your whole light body and your field, your chakras, central channel connected to divine realms, maybe feel your heart, if that feels good to you, noticing what might be alive and present in the heart and just maybe receiving some nourishment for anything that might be painting your heart or joyous in your heart, whatever it may be, nothing is unwelcome. And down through your organs, your viscera, it's breathing, letting your body be maybe soft and open if that feels good to you, any place you've been tight and maybe taut tense, letting the breath rise and fall and the prana, let it delivers, yeah, just like that. Yeah, let your belly be open and the solar plexus, sacral plexus, all through the soft tissue to belly, pelvic floor, joints and the hips and down through your legs, your feet, feel perhaps that you are filled with light from head to toe, like the higher self or maybe a galactic self coming in from above, feeling the envelope of your skin and helping you come home to whatever it is that you've maybe lost or forgotten and just rest there. If it feels good to you, you can also let the base of your spine connect down into the earth. If you like, take what you need, leave the rest. Maybe feeling all of that energy, maybe a quiescence radiating out through your field in local and non-local space and maybe feeling the potential of expansion of your own energy and how it speaks, unique vibration that belongs to you. Like I said, letting yourself come home and anything you've forgotten, being allowed to journey back to you in just the right time. Yeah, just like that. [Sighing] Thank you, guys, so much. [Sighing] Yeah. [Sighing] [Sighing] Thank you, guys, so much. Yeah. So, thank you. I'm about to feed you more information. So, remember that light? And I will say, I don't think this is anybody's first rodeo here with this stuff, but we're going to be going into some dark wells coming back out of them. And some of this could be a bit triggering if you were brand new to this. Like I said, you're probably not, but just maybe somebody online is listening for the first time, whoever it may be. I'd just like to give that disclaimer. I do touch on some things that could be potentially disturbing. All right, thank you all for coming. I think I've said that. This is pretty magical. And I'm so honored to be here. I'm going to give one little announcement of my own. I had a couple of dreams in the last couple months in which I showed up at this conference, and there were kids, a lot of them from my elementary school in New Hampshire. And I want to say, if there's anybody out here online or otherwise that went to a main dumpstable elementary school, contact me because we need to talk. Yeah, that's all. I just thought those dreams are coming for a reason, man. And then they were grown up. They're grown up like me. They were in the programs. So, and with this, just to give an overview, I was guided to give really a lot of the early beginnings of my story, things with my natal family, which are very taboo to talk about, and difficult for me to talk about, but it's needed. And we'll go into Mars and, you know, my 20th back, and we'll hit that. I was taken to the 20th back when I was 9 in 1982, in the fall of 1982, but so much led up to that. And it would be, I would be leaving out such a huge part of the story if I didn't include my earliest life with my parents and other, well, handlers, I might say. And I think, you know, I was really asking to bring in what would be most useful to people in the audience here and our online viewers, viewers in the future. And I know that this overview is going to help unlock some folks. And the reason that I'm going to go deeper into some of the family stuff is because some folks are hung up on getting into space and the space memories when, if you go into this, and this is not for everybody in the room, but some particular people I was receiving these messages for, go into the family stuff, there's stuff right in front of you that you're not seeing. That is my story, too. And I will say, there's just a couple things I'll cover before I go into probably my father. Anybody know much about my dad? Probably, okay. Then it's good. You guys don't really know my story, so it's good that we're going to start kind of in the bare beginnings. What follows here, I really did sign up for at a soul level. I really did, I think I came in to experience this, to recover myself, to not die in the programs, and to become a voice of disclosure. And so all the things you might find harrowing that I'm going to talk about are part of the journey of what I came here to do. So I did go through a period in which I felt myself to be kind of a victim of all of this. That's fair from a 3D perspective, but as I kind of aged and grown and matured with how I view this, it's very different. And I work in the Akashic Records as a seer, an intuitive, and a channel. That was light language that came through, wasn't planning that. And in the Akashic Records, we're always looking at the journey of the soul and what is the intention over lifetimes and what we're doing here. So it's no surprise that I have a more, I would say, for myself a refined understanding of this big, big journey I'm on. And yeah, wow. I also, this is something that I don't share much about, you have what I would, I identify as a self aspect, an Andromeda aspect, on a light ship, a light alliance ship that I have a counterpart up there, or a mate, you might say, his name is Tyran, he's from Procyon. And we wanted to understand a lot as much as we could about the galactic slave trade. And that's giving us a deeper meaning about why I signed up for this. I came into this body so we on the ship could learn what the hell was going on with the slave trade that the Draco were running. I'm going to talk a lot about that too. So I hope that gives a little deeper perspective about this. And just to say a few words about memory retrieval. Yeah, Tyler at the beginning said, "Did you get this through regression?" And I was like, "No man, I wish hypnosis would work on me, it doesn't." So in 2012, I was hit by a car on my bike in northern New Mexico. I was out on a training ride on my road bike and had a concussion. And after that, it was like a thousand screaming prisoners were let go in my mind. And my life turned to shit. It opened compartments in my brain, and I think at the moment of impact, it like let loose everything. Even though I didn't see it all consciously or remember it all consciously, all the memories that I have slowly been unpacking, it was there at a subconscious level and became much more accessible to me. But after that, my life fell apart. And I got on a spiritual journey because I didn't know what else to do. And that saved my life. And the spiritual journey led me to meditation, which is where a lot of the memories have come back in deep meditation. It's part of what I do every morning and evening. And after about an hour of just being with my own experience, it is not unlike hypnosis in that it allows me to access a deeper brainwave state. And it opens up those compartments in the mind. So, and I still, I want to say, I always say this, I'm still in a process of recovering memory. I will be till I leave this body because there's so many experiences over so many years. It's really unfathomable that it's going to be ongoing. Like if I waited until my story was all like tight and tidy and dialed, I'd never, I'd die and never be here. I would die and not finish the mission. So, I can't wait. I can give you what I can give you now, though. And I do, I have recovered quite a lot. The psychic ability that I have also helps me see things. So, that's been a bonus. And you know what? It's been a tremendous victory to get back. After decades of dormancy, the psychic abilities that they use me for in the programs, that's been tremendously blessed to me or kind of redemptive for some of my life. They want us kids because they can, they can build us out psychically. But if we already have it, man, we are like a little gold mine, little kiddies, kiddos who have the psychic ability and come from very traumatized backgrounds, maybe have particular bloodline affiliations, you're wanted. You guys know what I'm talking about. So, I think Jodi said this maybe on Monday night. Is it the longing to know when you're ready to know? That will also open your doorways to remembering what happened to you. You really have to want to know. And I'm there. I think in the very beginning, I got there kicking and screaming, wanting to know and not wanting to know in a way. I think you guys can relate to that. Those of you who have experienced abduction or many other things that go with that. Then again, my father dying two years ago really opened up the floodgates. He was very much responsible from a certain perspective for me landing in the Secret Space Program. Let's talk about that. Yeah. I tend to get a lot of memories back when people who were in some way responsible pass out of the body and transition into what we call death. So, my father, yeah, he was in the military in the Army doing clearance work back in the '60s, Vietnam, Southeast Asia, and worked with the CIA. When I was born, he still had a secret clearance and he was moved up to top secret with a lot of access to secret compartmented or, excuse me, sensitive compartmented information, which is pretty, he told me that under duress when he was in hospice before he died in 2020. I didn't actually know Dad had a secret clearance, top secret clearance, or what he was doing for almost 50 years of my life. And I feel so stupid. He was right in front of me. We were never to ask my father what he did for work, where he went, where he traveled all the time. He did, again, on his death bed, tell me he was working with NASA, the CIA, other alphabet agencies, and a little bit, he alluded to what he had done. He was a specialist in satellite communications. He was an aerospace engineer, and eventually was working, he was in the Navy and then worked for Lockheed Martin. So, it probably gives you a pretty good understanding of where this all came in. Both my parents were in the military. Yeah, so, I think it was last, it was just last year, the late the year before, I was given several visions in meditation that I didn't want. It was my father sitting with a table of Navy guys and guys in suits and two grays and he was signing papers for me. I believe this happened before I was born. My vision was given over several days, identically, to me, and I was like, you know, holding my eyes shut and my ears shut because it really fucked up my life. The suits were saying to him, this is for the betterment of humanity. There was handing them with papers and a pen and saying, "Sign this." This was for me. So, when other people have asked, "When did you give your consent?" This happened before I was born. The whole birth of my brother and I was planned in what I call the My Let Family Breeding Program. I think my father was taken into the programs too and I'm pretty sure my brother was. So, that's kind of a lot. I really had to sit with that information about Dad for a long time. Like, it really landed pretty hard. Yeah, I think it still does. Yeah. So, let's talk about that. My Let Family Breeding Program. I don't have a better name, that's just what I call it. It's sort of the pre-ordained nature of some of the, you know, they bring people together to make babies to take them to space. I mean, that's kind of a blunt and crude way to put it. My parents had nothing in common. They met in '65 in Fort Mom in New Jersey. They were married a month later. I don't really understand it. Yeah, let me talk first. I'll go into my mother and all of that. There's some deep, dark, scary history there. But Dad, how do I say? Why do I think he was taken into the programs? Let me cut to that chase pretty quickly here. I suspected this for a long time. I was asking this to my higher self and my guides. Can you show me something about this? I know this. I know he had psychic abilities. I know he had experiences with extraterrestrials. He called it that. He called it out of body experiences, flying and other people who visited him. We don't know. Back in, I think it was January, I had a dream experience in which I was back taking care of my dad like I did before he died of cancer. And he was in his recliner with his head kind of lolling off to the side in an uncomfortable position. And in the dream, I go and I put my hand on his heart. A gesture of tenderness, right? But also a gesture of like, are you breathing? Are you alive? In that moment, I see a ship, a low row of lights close to the horizon, and I wake up in my bed screaming no as I'm falling back very abruptly and almost violently back into my body. It was one of those triangular craft. And this wasn't my experience in a way. It was given to me so that I could understand my father's experience. I put my hand on his heart. I fall through a portal and I'm having his experience of abduction and being taken back into his body. It was, I was dropping back into my body physically and shuddering kind of laterally at the same time. I was like, did you guys just learn how to drive? Did you just get your license? Is that how you do this? Could you do a little smoother? Anyway, I sat there in the dark before dawn for a long time. I was pretty shaken. Like, what the fuck just happened? I never remember coming back into my body like that after all the times I've been abducted. This was really shocking. All I could think about was the DC lights in 1952. I have no real interest in the DC flyover. I know what it is. And then I got it psychically. Oh, let's see here my father was taken when he was nine years old and 52. I was taken at nine years old in 1982. I knew that was true. A couple of weeks later or around the same time I had been out. I had been watching it. Oh, it was Gary McKinnon and Richard Dolan interview from 2019 and Gary McKinnon. I think Darryl mentioned him last night. He was the one who hacked into the NASA computers, you know, probably 2002 or something. It was early 2000s, yeah? 2002. Anyway, I was watching that. I was walking at night after that looking up at the stars like I often do, making a lot of connection the way I often do. And I said just out of nowhere I was thinking about my father's hacking books that I had been sorting through after his death, you know, about the same time. I said into nothingness, no particular person I was talking to, kind of to him. And I said, "Dad, what are you looking for?" And I heard him answer back my own files. He was looking for his own damn files. What the hell does that mean? You could take that in a lot of poetic ways, but I think he was looking for his program files. He was a hacker. He was a lot of things. He could do anything with a computer. Anything. So I have a lot of reason to believe. He fit all the star seat characteristics. He grew up in an orphanage. There's blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. They wanted him to. It's interesting in how they... They will often, they, the dark lords of depravity that run these programs, consortium. They like to make the victims the perpetrator. The system that they have devised runs best when they can make the victim a perpetrator. And that's what I think happened to dad. He was deeply stuck in the system that he was working in. And also a victim to it. Even though from a certain perspective, I could say I was victimized by his acquiescence to what they wanted. So there's a view on that. Yeah, my brother has psychic abilities. He doesn't ever say it like that. But I know he also had out of body experiences. And we talked about some things out when my father died. Mostly he said, "Who was dad? Who was he? He was a mystery man. We don't know." My brother was the one who said, "Do you remember Rebecca when we were taken into testing at school for ESP?" No, I don't remember that. What else do you remember? I don't remember that. He also remembers going up in a plane with my godfather, Mr. E. Mr. E took me places that I'm going to talk about shortly. I don't remember going in a plane. But that was helpful information that you can get from... My sibling gave me some confirmations that I really wasn't expecting but really needed. One more thing about my father. I think he was working on mind control back in the '70s, the early versions of psychotramic weaponry that connect with people through satellites. I found some papers after he died that talked about controlling mass psychology through implants in the brain. These were written in his own hand. He detailed some scientific formula and mathematical equations. Yeah, talked about the angstrom spacing between neurons in the brain. We're looking at these papers and my mouth was open while my jaw was on the floor. I think he was both mind controlled and also working on mind control technology. I can't really prove it other than that paperwork and what I see intuitively. I will offer you that. I guess I have to have my mother. I was going to talk about that. I was so nervous and I realized this morning because my five-year-old child was having a freak out and just wanted to hide in the closet and run away. It's about this stuff. I never talk about this stuff in interviews ever. I've mentioned one of the things I'm going to say here. I've only talked about once and it was on my very first YouTube video in the Bringing Light to the Darkness series and I was a wreck when I talked about it so hopefully I'll keep it together. I can skip all this, my mother, but I'm not going to because it's contextual information that somebody or a few people or many people in the audience need somehow. I'm going to get a drink. Okay. We got to the part about my mother being a breeder. Sorry, Mom. That's what I see. The reason for that would be that she was part of a satanic lineage. Her father was a reverend playing both light and dark and this goes back from what I can tell at least six generations and my mother's completely German bloodline. Her father worked as a chaplain in Nazi Germany and was in the army but the memories I have are what happened with my birth family on her side of the family. They're pretty fragmented still and some of them are pretty horrific. This is a part of my story I'd really like to sweep inside a corner and put in a vault. This is way harder to talk about than the stuff in space. Her father was a reverend and I've had some conversations with him as I do work as a medium. I talked to dead people pretty easy and he came to me and said, "Yeah, I was doing that and I was trying to get out of it. I was trying to break the spell. I didn't know how to do it and I failed." Coming down through the satanic ritual, I don't know how much detail I want to go into that but it came down into my mother's brother and I remember most clearly being abused by him in the woods in his property. He has an 1800 century, 1800 cemetery on his property. Their grandfather was a cemetery caretaker. There's a lot of stuff that is very weird. This uncle, my mother's brother, wears camo all the time and in his basement is this huge collection of Nazi leftover stuff, memorabilia, flags, helmets, weaponry, insignia, symbols. Nobody in my family would go over there for Easter and Christmas and New Year's. Nobody ever said anything about how fucked up that was, like that was right in front of us. Nobody ever said anything. I remember being hung as an infant by my neck, by my uncle and I say that because what has come down through that lineage is a shapeshifting reptilian demonic entity, feeding on abuse over generations and it's connected to the Draco. The Draco owned me from the time that happened until I was all through the programs. I'll get into that as much as I can as I go on here. All the way on to Planet X, I was completely owned by them later in the programs as a weaponized asset. I was a patrol for them in the far reaches of the solar system. It started back here in my mom's family. She has this in her bloodline. Like I said, I've done a lot of deep digging around the context of this stuff and that led me to that understanding, no wonder they wanted her as my mother. So I hope that makes some sense. I will say that just a note on this because people probably wonder what are the mechanics of this, how come they don't kill the kid? Sometimes they do, but mostly they don't want to kill the child, they want to keep using it. It's not an asset if you kill a child usually, unless you're doing a sacrifice on purpose. They have, like I would say, witnessing both my grandfather and my uncle doing things to me. They have dark entities that work in collusion with the perpetrator, telling the perp what to do at every step of the journey when they're doing what they're doing. And their boss are those reptilian, the reptilian energy field. My mother, when she used to get up in my face and I knew she was going to abuse me, her eyes were, I thought this is a kid that they were looked reptilian, her eyes look reptilian, they look like little snake eyes that get really small and I knew I was going to get it. Now I see this all so clearly. I've had many dreams of my mother as a reptilian, I'm so sorry. It's not really funny. I have a little bit of dark humor around all this because it's helped me get through. But I've done a lot of work to get where I am and I feel like if I'm well enough to share this, I have to. There's a moral imperative in our collective now for people who have experienced this, who can kind of keep their shit together in front of the public to share it, they, we need to come forward. This is real, it's not make believe. So I know coming into this for the first time, it's tempting to dismiss it like it's not, this doesn't really go on. I know because I have a lot of clients who find me, who are victims of satanic ritual abuse in their families, that it does go on. It is connected, connected completely to the programs. Why is this, why, why would it be connected to going into space later? Because all the program that's already there, the kid has already learned to completely dissociate and learn that someone else mastered, is the master of the child, the kid is going to be 100% obedient at all times, never questioning authority, completely owned slave. And that's what I became. So it's taken me a long time to get here. Yeah. Thank you for, uh, yeah, wow. Thank you. Thanks so much. So yeah, that was, the main point was really the connection there can be between ritual abuse and, um, of different stripes and, and the programs being taken into space. So I do see that in a, I'm also becoming a researcher with all the people who come to see me as clients. And what I find out from their stories has given me a lot more information too. So I appreciate everyone who's come and the work I've done, been able to do with others. And that I'm well enough to work with others and actually be helping people. Yeah, I would also say, I want to connect that dis, this whole dark part of things, um, with my mission. I know, I know, I know, and I understand this now, that part of what I'm doing, and especially talking about this, I could keep this really hidden, that would be fine, but it's helping unlock the light in this lineage without maybe coming embedded in its darkness. So that's a clear part of why I feel compelled to share this particular information set. So thanks for listening. We have one more person to talk about, and then we can, I think we can go to the moon. Um, yeah, I'm losing my voice a little, hang on. You know, it's programming, um, the way, you know, like I said, the five-year-old child was like, I'm going to go hide in the closet and I'm going to run away, I'm not talking. This program, because I tell you, if you ever say anything about this, we will kill you. So this is deputy programming, um, yeah, let's talk about Mr. E. Mr. E worked side by side with my father in black projects that Lockheed. He was my godfather, I was given to him when I was born, and he was absolutely a handler. He came from Germany at age 10, his father died in the war, so he was a German immigrant. Um, I guess I just call it what it is. He brought me to, uh, oh this is hard, yeah, wow, thanks for bearing with me as I go through the dark parts. It's going to get lighter when we get to other places, relatively speaking. He brought me two events that were, all I can call them is deep state, deep black child pedophilia events. I was filmed, many other kids were filmed at the events that we went to, and it's all about black mailing the men who are raping children on film, so that they become slaves to the system. And it's not to say that those men that are raping children within this whole big child porn industry, a lot of which is run by the elite, uh, it's not to say they don't have a proclivity for sex with children, but there's a lot of distortion and a lot of, uh, manipulation of those minds of the men. They're responsible for their actions, uh, don't get me wrong, but there's so much that I see inside of this that is so depraved and so inverted, and that's why of course you know this, that it's been able to thrive for so long. Child pornography is a multi-billion dollar industry, and I'm really curious what that is funding, space program stuff, I don't know, I mean, thanks to think about, uh, I remember going with my, this was what my, my brother was saying to remember going up in the plane with Mr. E, Mr. E had a private pilot's license, he came out of the Air Force with a clearance, secret clearance, uh, he had a private plane, and uh, I remembered being driven places by him, um, until I was seven years old, and I'd be taken into a, I just remember it as a basement, I don't know actually where I was, I remember leaving my mom's house one at one time in particular, getting in a car, leaving, driving down the hill, my mom's waving from the front door, uh, and I know we're going on a, a filming event, he's got a camera, that's what my mom thinks it is, but it was a, it was a, all the kids there there's, um, I don't know, I'll probably say six or eight of us, um, we were, we were drugged, um, they use hypnosis, this is why I don't really do well with regression, because it's been used for very bad things, and I won't submit to it, uh, maybe that'll change it, um, and what I, I think the drug was probably roh hypnol, which has been around since the sixties, um, it's a, it's a day, we call the day rate drug, that makes you have complete amnesia, and uh, forget everything that happened, but I remember being, um, raped and sodomized in ways that are highly deviant and extremely degrading, then, uh, again, they know what they're doing, and that was the first time I ever saw a child die, it was at one of those events, and I think that's why I'm actually here talking, because I saw children die, it's not about me, I'm still living, so I have a, again, a moral imperative to tell the story, I saw a child die, and they filmed it, and it was sexualized, this is what goes on, um, yeah, there's things that I wish I could unsee, that I can, and that's sobering stuff, I know that, like I said, I could, I could leave this out of the story, but I feel like it's important for the collective that this stuff get aired, not just for me, who cares, it's not my singular story, but all of this, it gets cleared, actually we begin to bring light, the light we brought in, and it's just the beginning of this, is getting embraced, this stuff is being embraced by that light, as we tell the story, and you guys hold space for this to transmute and transform, so I saw children die in the programs, I saw it at Montauk, but this was the first time, there was nothing left of her body than they were done, um, that's hard to hear, but it's something I will always live with and never forget. Yeah, and it feels good too, after 45 years, I mean this happened, I was born in 72, this happened when I was about, this was 4 years old, it was a 76-ish, these events went on for a while, um, a long time ago, but there was a redemption in this, not a little girl has come back to me, so thanks for listening to that, um, somehow it's important to tie all this together, Mr. D was very much a part 2 of all that ended me up in space, I feel, yeah, and for some weird reason I got, his son got in touch with me, and I think there's, we've become friends, he's 5 years younger than me, and I think he was also used in similar ways, he takes medicine for bipolar and, um, like drugs for anti-psychotic behavior, his brother committed suicide, these points were the fact that there's something amiss in the family of Mr. E, more coming on that, I'm sure, um, yeah, so this was all over my early life, we're gonna go to the moon now, thanks everybody. Thanks for hanging out with us, uh, difficult parts of the journey, and like I said, there is, there's people out there listening who are putting together a story, and this is gonna help, this is gonna help, I'm always happy to tell this if I know this is gonna help somebody, um, uh, Mr. E was also the connection to Montauk, it was through him that I ended up at Montauk, I'm not gonna go into Montauk, we've done enough of the dark, dark scary stuff, um, talk about abduction, talk about abduction, so you see how there was already so much trauma in my early life that I'd become completely dissociated and fragmented, just like my mother, um, and I was just passed on to me, I didn't have any will of my own, I don't, I mean I was seeking psychiatric help for suicidal tendencies when I was in my late teens, uh, I'm surprised it took me long that long to get there, but I was struggling deeply by the time I was about 12, um, yeah, we'll talk about healing stuff at the end, and how I've gotten as, as well as I have, relatively speaking, um, so into the, the phase of abduction, uh, I was taken back in fourth to the moon, um, to the dark fleet base, beginning when I was four, and I was, again, I feel kind of stupid because when I look back, I was having nose bleeds all the time, from time of ages four and five, like kindergarten age, I was, my mom was always having to come down and get me a kindergarten because I was my nose was bleeding all over and then she'd spend the whole time driving back yelling at me, um, and I was always waking up with my, my head at the foot of my bed, my clothes were on weird, my jewelry was gone, my clothes were, the bed clothes were all over the place, my mom would say you're really messy sleeper, what's going on in there, why don't you come check on me, I'm getting abducted, but all I would really remember was, uh, being, like, waking up mute and trying to scream and I couldn't move like I was paralyzed, and a lot of that was abduction, and a lot of it was going to the moon, um, I remember insectoids coming around to get me, uh, working with grays, the grays were ubiquitous in my early life, I didn't really talk much about them, sometimes I wake up in my early life, like three, three years old, and they just be standing there, like, they weren't even doing anything, like, what do you guys want, they just be standing there, tall grays, my father had an affiliation with tall grays, sometimes he'd be with them, um, and there's a lot to that story, I probably need to go into that now, um, how many talk about the dark leap base, what were they doing with, with me, what was the point of that, this was not a 20 and back, here's another anomaly, and we could call it, I don't know, like, Jackie's experimental programs is similar, because I was taken back and forth, and initially, let's talk about the dark leap base itself, at least in the day, and what I remember, was Germans, Draco, and grays working there, and the part of the base that I was working in was a massive, um, galactic slave trade hub, they were cloning, and doing a lot of experimental projects, and, um, hybridization type stuff, I interacted mostly with Draco, not surprising, um, a lot of interactions with Draco, and they were honing my telepathic abilities at the beginning, a sort of light duty, um, introducing me to what went on there, showing me captive beings, um, eventually I was given a job in which I was supposed to befriend the beings, a lot of which were benevolent beings, kept in, I remember them being caged, caged beings, and they were doing them, yeah, like I said, genetics, DNA stuff, I was supposed to communicate with a being, befriend them, have nice conversations with them if you like telepathically, but what I was doing was getting their DNA information, and taking a snapshot of it with my mind, it was ferried back to a central computer, and, um, kept there, it was just, it was data, getting data, I always felt like I was betraying those beings, and I, um, as I always said, I don't have a good sense of the time span, which I would be kept when I was taken in and out, I was, I remember going to a substation underground from my bed at night, I just felt like going to a day job, um, and I'd be taken, I remember being strapped in, like, you know, roller coaster thing where you're kind of, you got the straps like here, and, uh, like a, some kind of, I can't tell you, I would suspect it was a warp drive propulsion system, I don't know, I used to think, maybe this is all, um, astral, astral abduction, the problem with that, that is all the weird misplacement of the body coming back in, I'm not really sure, um, I'm, I'm hopeful that it could be just a astral abduction, but with all the other memories corroborating a physical journey, uh, I don't think so, um, this is a lot, isn't it? Yeah, um, at some point after I was taken out in 670, see, 78-ish, I was taken to Montauk, and after that, because I was so broken and fragmented in just very precise ways after that, that they could use me for what I would call heavier duty as opposed to light duty, um, on the moon at this base with all the scary labs. And the, the more, uh, advanced job, I guess I could say that I was given was as a, I was operating jump gate between the moon and Dulce, New Mexico, and in my earliest time coming out and I was talking about the moon, I didn't realize that I was actually talking about Dulce, because I described in some early interviews what I had seen on the moon as very much adrenaline of what I had heard about in Dulce, to come find out, yeah, the memory came back that it was actually jump gate from that base into Dulce, and that's where I would say the dungeon, the deepest dungeon was in Dulce, that's where they were doing the deepest darkest dirty work, and on the top side, the moon is where the coming and going and the trade were actually happening, and I would liken, we talk about child pornography being a three billion dollar, you know, global annual industry, let's relate that with something like the galactic slave trade, I mean, we're not just talking about trade in humans, which is bad enough, but also the trade in things you can't imagine, I mean, being extraterrestrials that are captured, and then trade it off, maybe they're experimented on in hybridized things are done to them, maybe they're cloned, whatever, and they're traded to other groups, some of them go off world, out of our solar system, it's a huge industry, and the Draco Empire, at least at that time, was getting very rich, because they were bosses, Draco are present anywhere, they're in charge, I mean, the Germans were there, the Grays were there, but they were not, I always felt like they were just sort of, I mean, the Germans had their power right, but the Draco, there's nothing that compares to Draco, I'm sorry, they're fearsome, and they are their top dog, but it's quite a, I feel like things have dimmed, dimmed, the light on the, you know, the supercharged super power around the slave trade in space has shifted quite a bit since this time, which was back in the 70s, long time ago, changed for the better, so I'm hoping that that's the case, and that there's not as much illegal trade going on with all different kinds of beings, not all of which are, how would you say, the star formation, some of them are not like a head to arms, two legs, there were plasma beings, beings that didn't really have, they're, they're, I don't know how to describe them, I really have a frame of reference, but they weren't like, bodies, the way you and I have bodies, it was a little different, a lot to that, let me talk just a bit about the Dulce gate, I'm gonna keep my eye on the time to here, okay, we're doing all right, I must be racing along, am I going too fast, go do slow, oh thank you, all right, oh God, Dulce, yeah, so why did they need me to work the Dulce gate, child's frequency, yeah, I was a, you could say a telepathic cargo chaperone, cargo being what was being created down in the Dulce lab, they wanted to get it topside to the moon so they could barter it, trade it, make it part of the system of the industry, so things can get lost in interstellar space, interdimensional space, if the gate is not worked properly, and I realized too that the reason they sent me back and forth to the moon so many times was actually training my biology to not come unglued, to be able to handle going through the jump gate over and over again, which isn't good for human biology, we're made to be on earth, we're made to be kind of here on Tara, and that's our biological, that's where we do best, so as a child, really, it's like the jump gate is like, you walk through that door and you're on earth, say this is the moon, you walk through the door, you just left the planet, you didn't know it, it's like you're walking in the bathroom in your house, like wow, I didn't even know, that's why, that's why the memories coming back, I didn't recognize it at first, that it was actually going into the Dulce base, and the reason that they also needed me was that because the cargo was, I would say, defiant of many of the laws of nature, pretty, how do you say it, inverted experiments they were doing, and you can call the jump gate kind of alive, you have to raise the frequency to get the gate to work properly, in a way that's all I was doing, that's kind of a weird job, what's going on? >> [INAUDIBLE] >> There may have been what I remember most of your grades, yeah, I was very much in a place of, like, I mean I was like fractured out of my mind and very dissociated, right, so I know I was just like doing this and like, don't ask, don't tell, don't look at anything, don't feel anything, I just be looking at the ground, I mostly remember grades and very dim light that had an orange cast to it, in a lot of stench, a lot of stench, a lot of, like if you could smell depravity, yeah, yeah, yeah, you bet, just because I don't remember, it doesn't mean it's not there, I don't know. So, wow, yeah, what else could I say about that, I mean I'm not going to go too deep into Dulce, I'm taking you guys into some pretty dark places, and I think we need to get a little lighter, but just to unpack that a little, because it's pretty anomalous as far as taking me, the back-y fourth-y kind of thing, I didn't get that for a long time and then it made sense when I got, oh yeah, it was training my child's biology to be able to withstand the rigors to the human body that those situations would present. I do remember, I'll always remember this, a big Draco, speaking of Draco, on the moon saying to me, here we have everything we need to create the perfect human, yeah, so does that give you an idea about the Draco agenda and the whole new world order, yeah, we're going to get into the super soldier program, we'll talk about that, control of human beings, I swear there's light in here, we're the ones bringing it, yeah, I have an awesome memory on Mars we're going to talk about, I'll save that, awesome really happy memory on Mars, so no there is that, and like I said I'm also going to talk about my healing journey and things like that, that'll be helpful. Okay, so Mars, this is the whole another thing, I was finally after being put back from the moon, I wish I could tell you how many times I was taken in the moon, like I don't, I was abducted so many times I don't even, I don't know, I don't have a sense of like, was I just gone a few hours, it was a few days, what happened, I don't know, I don't know, I'm still working on that, I'm working on a lot of things, so age nine was one I was taken, it was September 1982, I was about to turn 10, I remember being taken out of my bed and looking back, it's like you're being sucked out the wall, I know this is like a weird way to explain very high technology, and I was looking back through the window and the light was on in the kitchen, I'm like oh my god this is going to go real bad, somebody helped me, and of course I'm paralyzed, I can't do anything, I can't say anything, I'm just going. On Mars, I was, just to make a long story short, I was built out into a cyborg weaponized asset, often called a super soldier, I preferred to call it a delta combat slave, which is more to the point, a super soldier sometimes can be a little bit, I don't know, in my mind it's a little bit glamorous, there's nothing glamorous about this, it's very degrading, and this happened over many years, so I get to Mars, I'm nine years old, and by the time I left, the whole program I was in my, I was around 30, a lot of training, that's very, very precise, that goes into this, and I remember mantids working on me, like they were doing the surgical work, and I was to explain a cyborg, I would say it's part, in our language now we'd say maybe AI, but it's, I mean I was electronically, psychically, biologically enhanced by all kinds of means, I mean it's crazy to think about, and if you struggle with this technology, I really understand that, and it's kind of weird to think about me, like why would they do that to me, like why don't they want just like big, hulky dudes, but they wanted this, the female psychic component, like I would be working in a unit with usually seven other people, and men, and it was partly for, I was doing psychic recon, among other things, that I'll also get into here, I do remember a lot of our, I was being built out with a number of others all at once, and this is, this is with the Mars colonies, I would end up working for Mars Defense Force, which defends the Mars colonies, I remember being in a, they put us in a training program, like a computer simulation, and it was, it comes back is, is almost bodily memory, like this hyper adrenalized amphetamine training, and I'm so blitzed out of my mind, like it's hard to like, it comes through me like an experience that's happening over again, and they would put us in there and get us all amped up to train us to kill, I mean, just what it boils down to, again, to make a long story short, those are not good memories, especially when they come in through, through me, not just his cognitive memories, but the things that come through me somatically, some of my memories do that, it can be pretty uncomfortable, and also, I know that part of my body have this heavy feeling that comes through this left side, in which I'm, I'm operating something, it's both psychic through the mind, but also through my body, and it's almost like an extension of my body, it's some kind of work craft, all through this left side, I could feel the build out in my body, and it's, it's not me, I mean, it's wed to my biology, so it is me, but they're very precise in what they're doing, then they take their time, and they don't really fuck up, even though a lot of what they're doing is research and development, we could say that they're making, they're making patrols to defend the colonies, we could say that they're doing research and development to see how humans can be augmented to suit their needs, how far can we take this, how far can we go, but in my experience and what I observed, I would say this is really about dehumanization and weaponization, and what can be achieved with controlling a human to this extent, it's kind of sad, I was a, yeah, and one of my first things too, when real training would have been, I mean, not the simulated computer program training, but the, the job was, I was given just interfacing with my body interfacing with a machine, an intelligent machine, a conscious machine, that I would become wed with, and eventually that would lead me to piloting, which is an extension of that, so your, oh, your mind is wed with a craft, you're operating as one unit, functioning together, so it's a kind of telepathic communication, which, which is with a, we call it a machine, but again it's alive, and Daryl, I think you mentioned this last night, it's, everything's alive, it's all got consciousness and all we're doing is tapping into that. Remember the first, the first thing I was actually piloting on Mars is a really weird memory, and it's like I'm driving this clunky old army retro, Mars retro fitted helicopter, the thing is like a piece of shit, like you know you get your first car, and it's like this, like back in the 80s I got just like $500 car, and it's like that, I'm like, oh my god, this is what we're driving, is this all we can do with all these big budgets we got for these programs? I don't know, so I do remember that, I love flying, that's a happy memory, I mean, man I love flying, love flying, and a lot of times I remember being on patrol by myself, like this was peace, you're always wired back into central command, man, you're not going to like take off in like a way, you're not, you're never going to do that, but it was pretty cool being able to pilot. So let's see, yeah, all the suits, yeah the suits, first off I would say about, you know, just to get inside, the mind of the the super soldier Adel to slave is to have no fear, no mercy, and no will of one's own. Again, me come upon this again and again the no will of your own, that was my experience in all these programs, I'm being controlled and mastered 100%. That's hard to really be with, I think, it's one of the more subtle and problematic components here that I have struggled with, but that's what the programming is about, the mind control program and the trauma-based mind control is about bending you to the will of the controllers. Yeah, I was just going to say about the suits, we wore men, those things were high tech, Darryl again touched on this last night, we have some common themes. I remember the cloaking technology very well in light of black suit with a little mandarin neck and it's kind of tight, it's totally tech, tech I can't even begin to describe. It seems temperature controlled, I was never cold on Mars, I remember being hot and I remember the sun being really bright and a lot of wind. I was on ground patrol a lot and I was in piloting as well and on patrol that way, I do remember the cloaking technology particularly, I always felt like it was like vaporizing, like we could just vanish and I remember we were out in our unit of seven with Defense Force just patrolling it when those big spiders came up over a hill and all the guys I was with had their cloaking technology on and somehow my malfunctioned and that spider killed me and I remember being face down, I was like, it was like a, how would you call it, a directed energy weapon and something inside me was burning and I was dead just dying and I remember being face down in the sand and my consciousness was there wondering where to go, it's a bit sad and I remember, I don't know if I said this, I was cloned many times, once they build you out to a certain extent and they've invested all this time and money on you, they're going to clone you and trade you, it's money. This was a cloned body that died but still it was the consciousness, my consciousness was very much awake and wondering what to do, so this took me into a whole other thing of like, wow, I remember dying several times, there's multiple deaths that I recall and that those deaths have made me live this life better, I mean not to put a happy face on everything but to say like, having lived through that there are so many times has given me an understanding in which now I think I take more risks and and more tempted to just live the life that's calling me, that's really beneficial if I want to say I got some gains out of this. Anyway, let's go into twinning, how about that, this is a little bit of a ride and these memories when they came back were hard on me and they still are back on journey to truth, there was an interview in which it was on with you guys and I was Tony and Johan and myself and you guys asked me a question, you're like, were you ever, did you ever have a counter part or like, were you, did you have a pair, was there a partner and I'm like, I know, well last fall, I did, I didn't know it at the time, I wasn't lying, I was out on a walk about on some land I go where there's no, it's just wild land, mountain hills of piñón and juniper, no people, no self service or anything and I'm just walking along and I'm thinking about the mantic caves on Mars and I'm going to talk about them here in a little bit. I felt this male presence behind me in etheric form, just feel his energy and I know it's an SSP guy and I can see, he's neutral, protective, he's wandering up on both sides, very strong energy, clear energy, nothing harmful, nothing scary. I can see his jeans, his t-shirt, his shoes, his hair, his receding hairline, color of his hair, his face is totally pixelated, totally pixelated, fun. And all he says, and all he says is, eventually later that night I got home and I'm like, who was that guy? I'm still trying to figure this out, I'm like stumped and he says, you're a hero, you saved me my life and like, I don't, I didn't save anybody, I don't know, I'm not a hero. I didn't know what he meant and this is, it's slowly unpacked over a period of weeks that he was my partner and mate on Mars, made a lot of sense because I knew I was taken to Great Lakes Naval Station, north of Chicago, it's the biggest naval training center in the country. I knew I was taken there and they did more stuff to me, they kept me in cages there too, this was the twinning with Dean, we were both taken there and we were bonded, when we were nine and sent to Mars, so that's sort of the preamble to Mars that I didn't share in the beginning, it's connected to him, his name is Dean and we're in touch, I would say, psychically, kind of heartbreaking. The twinning is completely out of the Illuminati and Nazi playbook, they trauma bonded us, they sexually made it us, they psychically made it us and they would torture one of us and make the other one watch and pretty soon they would make us torture each other and on and on it goes, I won't take you down, that dark road, they made us love each other, they helped us to want to protect each other, they ignited the human heart in us deep inside the bowels of these programs, they made us care. Why is that useful later? Because you're on a mission and you're working together as psychic recounts, that's what we did and if you love somebody in the mission it's going to be successful. You're inside each other's mind, you're inside each other's body, you know what the other person is thinking and when Dean and I communicate now, sometimes and I've never had telepathic communication like this, I don't know who said what, it's like I said it or he said it, it's the same person, it is very eerie, he's pretty messed up right now but he came back to show me my own memories and he is, our memories are wed together and so is our healing, it makes me sad, it's like somehow watching some of you love be tortured is worse than receiving it yourself and with this I began to understand that there's nothing in the programs that they won't do to meet the end of control and their experiments in controlling us. The Mars colonies have been said to be run by psychopaths and this is when I began to believe that. When we were older on Mars things got worse and I want to talk about our recon missions in the mounted caves. In the end he was made to kill me, they turned on his kill command altar and he killed me at point blank range and that is straight out of what happens in the Illuminati programming, this comes down through the Illuminati families and eventually one of the twins will be made to kill the other. It's really sad, a clone body, he was incarcerated on Mars and framed for my murder and it was all a setup, it's a lot to sit with. This is one of the memories that is still really tough for me because I know Dean is struggling and I certainly have but I'd rather know than not know so we have a shot at healing, we unlock each other's healing and there's a lot of light in that too so this is actually more common, I started researching this. You can always look at Joseph Mengele's experiments on twins and Auschwitz in the 1940s. They copied this from there. Twins feel each other deeply. We did good work together and his life isn't over and neither is mine, that was Mars, this is Earth. I'm going to let me shift this over to one of our, I want to talk about the mounted caves and what I found there, what we discovered in the mounted caves. I call it a mounted labyrinth, it's actually the native mantis on Mars, they didn't have any problem with us being there, they weren't aggressive, they wanted to mine their own business but we come in and we want to make war with them and make them our subjects. So one of our jobs from our commanders was to was to go over to the mounted caves and we were looking in our small unit to capture the mounted elders and then to unlock the key code, a frequency key code for the whole race so we could control them, that was the idea, a frequency that sort of creates a oneness in the the mounted race there. It was thought that if we could kind of get the code, we could basically own them. It was just kind of in a nutshell, it's a little more complicated than that but we did have mantis working for us, I'm not sure quite how that happened but I think we captured them and some of them may have volunteered just like there could be factions of humans on this team or that team, it wasn't really any different but the mantis were highly intelligent, they weren't just bugs, tall bugs on long legs, they had a very high level civilization and I felt like God if we had made them our allies we could have learned so much instead of creating adversaries but I remember you know Dean and I worked together to look at things from the base we could look psychically at a situation farther away on the planet and get a read on things and in preparation for some of our ground missions with the rest of the crew we would be checking it out and I remember seeing from our psychic looking, psychic viewing, remote viewing, a bunch of mantis around a high, I guess I could call it a table, you know that's the biggest, the closest frame of reference, I would call it, a high table that had like glyphs or symbols written in light and it was moving light and they were getting information out of the table, it was really fascinating, it's like a blue emanation, I mean I guess we could liken it to kind of a screen technology but it was more I don't know, elevated than that, I don't know exactly what they were interfacing with but it was really interesting, when we were actually going over to the mantis caverns ourselves, what I call the labyrinth, our commanders didn't tell us this but we were actually looking to understand the energy field that protected their underground labyrinth, their domicile, their, this is very high level and what I understood from going over there and thinking about this now and understanding so much more, I mean it was so opulent, the frequency, like these aren't like caveman caves, these are like, there's some kind of off-world substance that was built into the native, I want to say earth and the native rock and stone and dirt of Mars that they had, the caves had been sculpted out of, it was wed with that and it emitted a frequency of pure light, it was like crystalline, it was so beautiful and it protected them and if you entered and you didn't have a certain frequency it could kill you, our commanders didn't tell us that when we went over there ostensibly to go hunting mantis that we could get killed, they wanted to see what would happen to us, it's really interesting but what I would say is that those, I understand this now completely, that the mantis while they've been on Mars a long time actually came from somewhere else and took up residence, this is the frame of reference, I will use this, I don't like to use someone else's terms but other, someone else's called them the ancient builders, I would call them ancient architects, ancient creators, ancient engineers and alchemists, they left that a long time ago, these people, this group, this consciousness, left a lot of different, very high level, incredibly high level sophisticated structures and technology throughout our solar system and this was one of those places, I'm very glad I got to go and check it out, it was phenomenal and not like walking into a crystal cave, like it was more, you wouldn't see it with your eyes but you could feel it, I could feel it, so that was one of the ways that we were working together and kind of an example of some of the things we did, I don't have, I struggle with this, I struggle to, so I talked about Dean killing me, it was his altar, Neil, they turned on his kill switch, he'll kill command and activated the killer in him, the thing is I had the same person in me, I had the same altar and that's something I'm really working hard to integrate because that is hard to, it's so hard to consider what I was made to do which was kill likely benevolent beings as a super soldier. I have trouble remembering a lot of battle memories as a result, I do remember being ambushed by a bunch of rogue mantids in our own equipment, they had some land cruiser type, you know, like tank-ish sort of things and in our aircraft too, one night I remember them raiding the base, they almost destroyed the whole base, I do remember that and I remember being, we were all taken by surprise by the mantids that night and I remember just neon explosions in the sky and being down like my left leg is all blown up, I remember, well some, they were running by me saying run run man we're gonna die, I can't run, my leg is gone, I don't know how that ended, if I was put in a regen or if I also died there, but that's a very vivid memory, but it's not one in which I was a combatant, it's not one that I was on offense, so I'm still working with that, that's gonna be a long time coming, but I think as Dean and I are able to do some work together it can come back together, like I said my memories of combat are bound up with him because we were fighting together too and protecting each other, protecting the team, protecting the base. A lot, let's come into that happy memory, Han Mars, it actually doesn't and that well, but you know it's all relative to what we were talking about, right? I didn't really make it out of this with a life, but you know I'm bringing this back around to Darryl, when you talked about the, you called him Amish reptilians on Mars, I was like dude he remembers that, I remember them, they picked me up, I crashed on patrol, I was just out doing my thing, and I was surprised they let me like patrol by myself because I like special, I don't think I was special, I don't know if I was shot down, I might have been, don't have good memory of why I crashed, I could have been the old junkie, I crashed out in the middle of nowhere, and I remember being taken back by these reptilians on Mars who were native, they were short kind of round, don't think of Draco, nothing like the Draco, there's some really, we've got really benevolent reptilian energies running around on and off our planet, so do remember that, they're not all Draco, they're not all trying to control us, they picked me up and took me to their underground civilized civilization, and it was like, they took me down to this place that had water, big trees, flowing water, they had grown food down there, they had no technology, they had no weapons, they had no craft, but they had spiritual, what I would call spiritual technology, and their race was very, very grasped because they had survived a cataclysm, and they were the only survivors so far apparently they were dying out, they're about, I remember about 20 or 30 of them, and they wanted, how it came through in my memory is that they wanted to inspect my soul, did I have a soul, but they wanted to check out my tech and my biology to see if could it be useful to them, could it help their race survive, but I remember them being kind to me, I remember them feeding me, I remember sitting around in a circle, eating something that was like vegetation, I don't know what it was, it was vegetable, like, and they were kind to me, this was like, this is why I say this is such a nice memory, like it's so different from everything else I've experienced up to this point, I feel like I lived with them and I bonded with them, and whether we say they stole me or they saved me, I don't know if it matters, I have fond memories of them, even though in the end you know, they cannibalized me for parts and I didn't live, but yeah, they weren't, I think because their genes had regressed so much, like another race might have been able to do what they wanted with just the DNA, and wish you don't have to kill somebody to get DNA, they didn't know how, that's all, they weren't, I've described them as not being the sharpest tool in the shed kind of thing, but it wasn't because they were inherently stupid, they just didn't have the gene, their genes had regressed, but they're, I would say, I mean what they had going, this is a beautiful thing, they were relating so beautifully with the spiritual energies of Mars, which is alive just like Guy Antera, you know, this plan, all the planets have an intelligence, they were working with that intelligence to create underground exactly what they needed to live, such a lesson for us now, we become very separate from the Earth energies and we can learn to do that here, I mean how are they having a light system and water underground on a planet like Mars feeding themselves, sheltering themselves, in a way this is very high intelligence, so you can describe them either way, but I have wondered, you know, even just in the last couple months I remember waking up in the night and going what happened did they make it, like what happened to that group I want to know, you know, I could feel like how I kind of care about what happened to them, so something precious in that, to have just a couple good memories, the memories of piloting and the memories of this group who were nicer to me than anybody else had been up until then in the programs, yeah, I wanted to share that, it's pretty special, I'm going to check the time again, okay, I've been doing way better on time, I thought my god I have like a five hour talk, I have to fit into 90 minutes, I'm going to talk, I'm going to go, we'll take us out to Planet X just briefly here and wrap up with this, not entirely but as far as describing space stuff, toward the end of everything when I was built out and sold off, I was sold off to the Draco, which we talked about in the early beginnings, you know, I did say that I feel like they own me from the start, I'm not surprised that I would end up later being owned completely by the Draco Empire as a weaponized asset, protecting their assets rather than defense force in the colonies on Mars. Planet X is beyond the Kuiper belt and it's not Nubiro, as far as my memories tell me, I don't have a memory of this being synonymous with Nubiro, just to clarify, this would be our tenth planet, if you want to describe it like that, we were, I don't remember being much on ground on the planet, but being, we were protecting the Draco mothership, and at the time, again, this was a huge planet X itself, was a massive slave trade hub, galactic slave trade hub, and the Draco, this is a huge planet, the Draco had complete control of it and a portal at the center of Planet X at the time, like I say, this was a long time ago, and I'm sure this has changed, fortunately it's changed, very well situated to have a slave trade hub, a meeting place at the edge of the solar system. So I was piloting there, we'd all have, there was a group of us, and many of us, we were all patrolling the atmosphere around the planet, and we come back from our shift and we fly back into the kind of, I don't know how you describe it, I mean, this mothership, it was black, huge, beautiful and elegant in a dark way, we'd fly back into the little drop down hatch at the end of the shift, and that was kind of the job, I remember a lot of peacefulness out there, but I know it wasn't all peaceful, my memories just haven't unlocked the most aggressive and violent aspects of what I was doing out there, I would say that being owned by the Draco was terrifying, the Draco was terrifying, there were Germans who showed up there from time to time, but they were like, I don't know, flies on the wall, they didn't have any power, it was a totally Draco empire, there weren't many humans around, the other patrols and I don't know, protectors of the Draco assets like myself were not all human, they were all hybridized in some way, there were many different species I didn't recognize, and some of them were Draco hybrids, and I do remember, I had a friend, let me tell you about my friend, can I tell you another kind of happy memory, I call him the pig man, he had the head of a pig, and his legs were super ripped, his arms were super ripped, Draco, he had a reptilian aspect, but he had a head of a pig, that's the best way I can describe it, and he was one of our trainers, he taught us about flying and just that and the other, but I always felt like he was an ally, he had my back, he wasn't a punisher, he wasn't going to victimize me, I felt like he was a friend, and he's come back to me too, etherically and chatted with me, and he said I miss you, and still we're in separate worlds, but we can communicate, and I know he's it's cool to be a seer and intuitive and be able to have this capacity now to interact at this level, it helps me heal, I do remember him fondly, but Draco, the Draco are so big and so scary, just like they come by and you just kind of look at the ground, and don't, they can read your mind so adeptly, like they know exactly what you're doing at all times, especially if they're right in front of you, you can't control what you're thinking, and they can, they can send, they can read what's going on in your head, and they can send you holographically into a hell realm of a paradise at the blink of an eye, a drop of a hat, just like that, and they would punish us that way, and they would reward us that way, a system of punishment and reward, and they could send us into a very bad place in which we would believe we were being tortured, but it was all holographic virtual reality, but they could also, I remember being sent into a very lush place that felt Lemurian, I mean it was such a treat to be able to, I don't know, do a good job and like get to go away for a while, our food was holographic, I remember eating holographic burgers with onions, pickle, and lettuce, and I would oversleep and get in trouble. Anyway, the memories there are, they're big, it's like they're, I feel like I'm reaching through deep space sometimes, and it's not unpleasant because that atmosphere is, I can't describe in human language like what that has done to me to see that kind of beauty, and I can't, I mean I'm going to go to my, the end of my life to my grave, and of like wondering about this and trying to put the pieces of being this far out, you know, beyond the beyond, putting those pieces together. So not entirely awful memories, but I know there's a lot there I still haven't accessed to be, to be quite honest. So go into healing, let me tell you guys want to hear about that, I think that would be good. I would say that meditation and spiritual practice saved my life completely. I don't think I'd be here now if I hadn't turned toward meditation spiritual practice back in, I think it was after the car accident, you know, maybe say 2013 and started meditating. That's when all the psychic stuffs are, my psychic ability started opening up then too, as I started to sit on the cushion in a really regular way. And then understanding the bigger picture, like I said at the beginning, the journey of my soul and how I wanted to explore all this, and how I wanted to be part of this. That's really fucked up, but I do understand that I did have my own hand in orchestrating this from a soul's perspective, and that's also been part of my salvation. If I hadn't gone through what I've gone through, I couldn't be here now talking to you guys. I couldn't be doing this. And I think I wrote survival into my script, like I didn't come in to die in the programs. I mean, I came to, I did die in the programs, but as a clone, I mean, I got to come back. There was a bigger, bigger script that I had written and not just a part of that. I would, getting down to the nuts and bolts therapy, I've done a lot of somatic experiencing therapy. So this is like working with a body to get the trapped memories of trauma out of the body. Because if you think about being a flight or flight state in which you can't do either one, you go into a freeze and you go into lockdown, and it's all stored in the musculoskeletal system and in the nervous system. So somatic therapy really unwinds that from the nervous system. And that's been incredibly helpful. I am working with a really new nervous system and I love exploring the world with this nervous system and one that is not empathic and not in PTSD anymore. I also have worked with a functional medical doctor to get my cortisol levels down. I have really high cortisol and it was causing me health problems. And that happens when the HPA access in the brain is always responding to danger that's not there. HPA access controls your stress response to, I mean, to sort of oversimplify it. And so with his help, I've gotten those cortisol levels down and I'm much more regulated. That's been awesome. And then I could talk more spiritually about two of my favorite guys, father on my left, mother on my left, excuse me, mother on my left, father on my right. I have parents from a previous lifetime with the Crow people who introduced themselves to me in 2018. They've been with me every day since then and they've been huge in my healing. I wish you could see them with me. They're here. They make me cry and they've taken such good care of me. They're the family I didn't have. I love them so much. And mothers taught me, both taught me so much. Mother has said, she's the one who said when this happens to one in the tribe and she means all of us in our collective, it happens to the many, it happens to all of us. And she said, we speak our stories and hold the stories together. They release their hold on us and on our future. Yeah. Thanks, Ma. Okay. In her child work, I've done a lot of my integration of really messed up parts. They come to me as children and that's how I've worked with getting whole again. The children who experience the children that I was, a child that I was who experienced being raped and sodomized and all the other things they talked about, they come to me as children who just need re-parenting and love. And that work is actually really easy when you open your heart and you can see them. And I do this work with clients all the time. It's kind of one of my specialties because I've done it so much of myself. It's powerful work and I would call it a kind of soul retrieval. Actually, it's a don't write the work off with the children. I always think, well, we might be tended to minimize it, but it's such big work. It's such an important work. Even if you haven't gone through the programs, you might have a little part that needs some help and that can make us whole again. They've been left out in the cold a long time. For all of us, we grown up in a traumatized world. We really have. And lots of us didn't get what we needed from our parents and our caregivers, even though they tried. So they're waiting for us. It's been really profound to work in that way. Yeah, coming out with a story has changed my life. That's been healing. Incredibly healing. Yeah. So this actually is the first time I've spoken in to a live audience. No, certainly not the first time I've spoken about this stuff, but it's also very, I think it's liberating. And the work I've done to help help my bloodline in a way like my healing helps lineage. I was talking about to get this stuff out and to get this to end and to stop with myself and others in the family who are not carrying on the tradition. That's huge. So I hope that gives you a little bit of a blueprint about what I work with personally. And also I've been journaling for like, I don't know, 30 years. I got a lot of books I'm lugging around. Journaling has helped me. And it's also helped. It was how I started to channel was through journaling. I was like, what am I writing? This is not me. I was just like angels coming through what's happening. I don't understand this. Yeah, I've done a lot of my processing work with just writing. I think for a kid who was so shut down and so silenced and never had anything of my own, certainly not my own voice. The journaling was really helpful and simple tool. So those are things that maybe resonate with you or maybe don't. And wow, I made it through all of that. Thank you so much. You bet. Yeah, I did so good on time, man. I got like 22 minutes. Yeah. Am I supposed to talk? Hey, what's going on? Yeah, the 20 that you talk about. So they pair them, you know, we hear this a lot. And I think there might be multiple 20 programs, not just the one you're talking about. But even the one you're talking about, do you think they still look for somebody who have spent past lives together for that connection anyway? So even though they're like trauma bonding you, what if they know there's already a soul connection? Oh, yeah, you even better. Yeah, yeah, they would. Yeah, very much, if there's already a soul connection going way back, then they have to do less work. But but so my point is just because it's trauma bonding and I would still think it's possible to heal that and you can still have a relationship with that person, even though you were forced. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I agree with that. Yeah, definitely. Yeah. Yeah. Jim. Rebecca. Somebody have a Kleenex. White my nose on my sleeve. You bring me a tissue. Thank you. Awesome. Yeah, Jim, go ahead. Yeah, well, thank you very much. For your perspective, I mean, there's so many facets to the SSP and what you bring is a very different facet and it's very helpful to me personally. And as a client, I'm very appreciative of your work in helping me develop and and your videos. I'm really getting into them and learning about the inner child and and very valuable things. So my my question is, it's just a detailed question. I have memories of being stationed at a place near Pluto. So I wondered if that would be similar to what you're talking about. You said you were beyond the Kuiper belt, Planet X. Yeah, yeah. So Pluto would be closer to the Sun and to Earth. But but there's a lot out there, Jim. I mean, there's a lot. So I mean, do you have pretty particular memories of, I mean, you could, are you trying to figure out where it is, eh? Yeah. Yeah. So I just keep getting like near Pluto. So I thought moon of Pluto or something. But when I heard you speak today, you know, it could be in the Kuiper belt. There's a lot of Kuiper belt objects. Yeah. It could be. It could be. There's a lot. There's a lot out there you say. There's a there's a lot of junk in the Kuiper belt. Yeah. But no, it's, you know, gosh, there's so much out there. Yeah. I'm curious where you were. What do you mean by junk? There's a lot of stuff. There's Kuiper belt objects, things that have exploded on things are just debris. Thank you. They're trying to figure out what's in the Kuiper belt. We don't actually have the science that really can pinpoint everything just yet, but there's a lot of stuff out there. What I was going to say is that a lot of times there's a there's I was on on bases, suborbital substations out in I didn't talk about this, but in the back of beyond point points in the solar system that only had a numeric coordinate to name them. So what I want to say is there's a lot of places that don't have names we recognize where you could have been. So not necessarily not doing Pluto, Moon, Mars, you know, we know those names, but but keep on that. Originally, I didn't know where I was at these. I was kind of a lookout, you know, and I was like, where the FMI man? And it's just there's you're in the vicinity. So, you know, you might not come up with a name. You could have been at one of those places that just has like an alphanumeric coding to pinpoint its place in the solar system. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. Thanks for being here. Hi. Hi. Thank you very much. Yeah. So specifically talking about that reptilian that you spoke fondly of, if I heard the reptilian group. No, the one guy that was really. Oh, yeah. Pigman. I think of more of as a pig than a yeah, yeah, reptile. Sure. So did he, I know this is pretty specific. Yeah. So that was kind of Mars related, right? Sorry. That was Planet X. Yeah, that was that was out out out. Yeah. With the Mars stuff, were you trained in hand to hand combat? Oh, yeah. We well hand to hand. This is a good question. We could kill somebody hand to hand no problem. It wasn't our specialty. Combat was more we'd have weaponry. It's pretty advanced. You didn't have to like we don't have to be like up with swords like poking people. We could like you were tested in hand to hand combat prior to we were. I remember that in training, especially the the training in the, how do I call it, simulated training? Yeah. Yeah, they would get us in hand to hand and like really amp up the aggro stuff. Definitely. Like, yeah. And then real quickly, also he mentioned the amphetamine type stuff. Was it an injection or a tablet? Was it an injection or a tablet? I don't know. They may have just done it in plantation or some kind of analog. It wouldn't actually have to be. It probably was, but with their technology, it could be anything. Are you working with memories around that? Yeah. Yeah, I could tell. I could tell. And it could have been, you know, we tend to use the frame of reference we have for Earth. And we got to let our minds kind of work beyond that. It might have been neither. It could have been a, you know, they surrounded you with an aura that felt like an amphetamine. Yeah. Could be lots of things, but yeah. Some sort of stimulant. Yeah. Okay. Thank you. Oh, I want to first say that I appreciate that I got to hear your story live for the first time. So thank you for that. It's my question is parallel to Tyler's question, I think, and I don't have it fully formulated. So I'm seeing a trend that that all these hijacked phenomena, there's also a natural component. In other words, there's a higher self and the soul level and that they all exist in a more natural form. If that's the right word, then they're also an engineered. So anything that that triggers to that you might have thoughts on that to speak to. I'm trying to see if I understand your question. I'm trying to put it together. So yeah, I'm trying to say that there's, there's, that there's a hole that, and then there's a group of beings, obviously, that are hijacking things that are, that are also natural. You know, say like a soul level or saying splitting our, our higher selves in a different components, there's also in a natural form. There's maybe four or five aspects of ourselves that are running around in different dimensions. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I hear what you're saying there. I don't know if I pinpointed your question. Like I said, I don't have it all put together. I just wonder if it triggers comments that would help me. If you're thinking that you have multiple parts that are doing different things, maybe, or that you have an over, our, our soul that's got a program for you, or I'm not sure. Sorry, if I'm not pinpointing it. No, I'm seeing that from the healing aspect that in rebuilding all of these things and putting ourselves back together, that there's like, like Tyler was saying that if two of you had past life experiences or soul experiences that once you heal this injured part, there's still a real natural piece of this. And I think that looking, so I don't know how to ask a question about it. I think you're unlocking something for yourself as you're, as you're, you know, speaking. And that's that maybe it doesn't need an answer. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I think I know. I think I know what you're trying to say. So for every, everything that's been hijacked, there's a natural component to it. So like Melody back there, she's, she had a good theory that like the 20 in back is actually trying to recreate the reincarnation cycle. Like basically think about us coming to this planet, we live our life. And then whenever it ends, you go back to the same point you came from. And it's like, they try to recreate that with the 20 in back. Yeah. There's a divine counterpart that naturally exists. They try and they hijack that. So for every day, you know, there's nothing we're the best robots like Tony Red Vicks. Yeah, totally. We're the best robots there are. Yeah. So any AI out there, they're trying to replicate us because we're superior to them. So for everything that's natural out there, everything they're doing, there's a natural polar opposite. And I think that's what you were getting at, something like that. Or even like, you know, I've had intuitive people that I think aren't open to this sort of thing yet. Tell me, oh, there's some past life or something. And as I reflect on that, I realize it's not really a past life. It's a 20 in back kind of life or yeah. So anyway, I think there's anyways, it's worth looking at that there's it is a natural source. You know, it's kind of like the how the one tree of life is really just a whole hijack system of the whole thing that really only has two more components to it that connects to source. Mm hmm. And then the one really exists inside of the other so that all of this exists in the source base system. Yeah. I'm sorry, I don't I don't have it formulated but I think it might be beyond our the limits of our language too. You know, as we're part of we're a part of a whole and that we're all like a past life could be, you know, it's all happening at once in a way too. Well, it's like our whole galaxies fall in and we're as a whole, we're putting we're reconnecting the whole thing. Mm hmm. So it's holographically goes through our whole system as well. Yeah, totally. Totally. Totally. We were saying one of your yeah, yeah. Teachers was telling you that it was Native Americans that I really relate to it that way. Yeah. That happens to all of us. But anyway, thank you. Yeah, sure. Hello. Hi. Thank you very much. Yeah. You emanate like beauty and I can see the healing that has. It's big. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. And I kind of already know the answer. I just want to hear your expression of it because, you know, we had four days of lots of stuff out of overload. Do you think there's a direct correlation of healing, integrating, alchemizing, which is actually liberating us from all of this control matrix and all of these programs. And will we reach a point? Because, you know, the as above so below, as in with so without how it all correlates together. Yeah. Well, we reach a point when we're like out of this this thing. Yes. Yeah. Yes. And we're doing it. We are part of that right now. Like, this is phenomenally powerful. What we're doing right here. Everybody who asks a question, everybody who tells a story, somebody who's having a conversation in the hallway, this is part of it. There's things going on all over a planet that are, for lack of better term, raising our vibration. We are doing it now and it exists already born at the cellular level of our being and at the cellular level of this planet and other planets. Thank you. Yeah. Hello again. Hi. Through so through your personal experience, communicating to extraterrestrials, you know, Draco and the Mantis for the great is like a through your personal experience. Well, what was the the main form of communication and was it telepath or was it? Yes. Yep. Telepathic. It's all telepathic. Yeah. You don't need to move your lips too much. Yeah. It's all. It's all. Yeah. Are you working on unpacking some story of your own? I rather not say, okay. Fair. Fair. Fair. Fair. But yeah, I totally appreciate it. But you know, but you're just gathering information that's like that. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. Hello. Hi. Thank you for sharing your story. So profoundly moving and this isn't really a question. Just really want to say I want to just acknowledge how many souls came in at this time to clean the lineage. Totally. And I got this awareness that I mean, I bet you could look around the room and we all have these like stories of our childhood. So thank you for sharing that part of the family lineage. Yeah. That these lineages wouldn't make it at this ascension point. And so we jumped in like, okay, come on, let's come in. And we're here to lift that and cleanse it and the buck stops here. Totally. And our children will not experience that. Well said. Well said. And while we're all gathered in the room, where two or more are gathered, so I'd like to just invite everyone to put their hand in their heart and just say, let's have a vision of a free world. Let's have a vision of a free world. Yeah. Let's let the truth ring out now widely across the planet and let us all be the disclosure. We are the freedom. We are the truth. And thank you all for gathering and thank you for sharing your beautiful story. Thank you. First of all, thank you. I, this is the first time I've ever been to something like this and I grew up in generational SRA as well. And I actually had emailed you. So thank you. Mm. Okay. I've been one of the many males ever see. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. So I have a question about sometimes I feel like there's the dark side is still connected to me. What can I do or what is the process to make sure that I'm cutting that cord? It can be different for different people. I'm just kind of looking in a different way, not a conceptual kind of thing. A lot of times it's connected through the, I'm looking at the sacral chakra and the solar plexus chakra. Sometimes it's working with those energy centers because that's where it takes up residence. Okay. If you feel like you're, that's where I see it on you predominantly here. That's, this part of me is completely frozen blocked and I know. Yeah. And you know, you can do the work yourself just by bringing a gentle awareness there in meditation or just maybe before you go to bed and just bring light there. Okay. With the intention you have to clear it and to be liberated. I know it sounds super simple, but it can be pretty easy because you're already there. You've done a lot of work or you wouldn't be here at the mic. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Hello, Rebecca. Thank you for everything that you're doing for the community. In your experience and travels, I'm sure that you've been aware that the American military has some sort of a super secret space program many fold and that the corporate America also has factions out there. It would be safe to assume that other nations and other corporate economic situations are doing the same thing. Correct. Yeah. Could you give us any testament as to how vast this problem is on our planet and your understanding of how many of us are impacted, whether we know it or not? Good. I can speak to a couple. That was a few questions in one thing. Yeah, it's big. It's big. And as my beautiful mother has said, if one is impacted, we all are. Everybody on the planet is impacted by the programs, whether it's the US or China or Russia or whatever Germany, whatever it doesn't matter, we're all impacted. Of course, we know. I think you know that answer. I would say, I remember, as a super soldier on Mars, I was sent with a group into a timeline war with a super soldier who was sent in from the future. And I was dragged out into a Japanese programmed future where everything was totally AI. Point being, well, they didn't win. They didn't drag us out. And there was partly, you know, what Tyler said, I think, before we're the best machine, they had not been able to think for themselves. We won. Human. But the point is that I remember interacting with the Japanese, of course, the Germans. I can't speak in what you said in my own experience. And that's the best way to come in always. I'd never take a guess at this. I can't really speak to how many nations have programs. How many nations have a child porn industry? A lot of them. I mean, getting at where is the funding coming from? They have to have some money. They have to be in cahoots with regressive aliens to have a program. So it's a great line of research. Have you been looking into this? Oh, yes, I have. Yes. So we could have, let's talk later. Thank you very much. Great question. Yeah. And then just for everybody here, I keep hearing everybody say, what can we do? And just my thoughts for everybody here. Share this information. It's fast and furious that you can in every direction. That's a good question. You know, we could talk about that too. Yeah. How are we doing? Or I think we're about done. Yeah. Let me take one. Okay. You got a question? Sure. After your 20, when did stuff start coming back to you? Was it slowly? Did you have any assistance during that? Did you have recollections in a layered kind of fashion or were you just kind of, you know, and how do you fill in the blanks when people say to you, remember when we were 15 and we did this and do those kinds of things happen? Yeah, all of that. Well, a lot of it didn't come back until after the car accident. I'd always had memories of what happened with my birth family, but I didn't believe them. That's one of the reasons I told that story is because a lot of us will have memories we don't believe. We will throw them out, baby, with the bath water because we think they're too fucked up to count, right? So, I mean, just in brief, I would say I really didn't start getting things back until after the accident in 2012. And really, as my father was starting to die a couple years before, wow, it was a steep curve, man. I had to drop everything in my life. My life was falling apart, but all the memories are coming in. So, it's going to be, it's going to look different for everybody. I'm sure you know that. And when you were being eaten, when your clone was being eaten by the spider, and you said, you know, your consciousness had a shit or so, I just can't imagine what that's like, especially if you've been cloned several times. Do all the clones realize one of us is going? Does the host realize it and not the clones? Yeah, these are good questions. I think that it eventually migrates back to the main, you know, because there's a bigger law in order, if you like, those aren't really the right words, but there's a universal system that's much bigger than all this depravity that's going to gather life back to life. You know? Yeah. Thank you. And just to speak briefly to what can we do, because I know I've talked to so many people who are wondering, what can we do? This is overwhelming. Bringing your mind to this is more powerful than you're aware. There are so many people on the planet right now who don't know about this and can't sit with it. If you're able to sit in this room after everything I just said, you are bringing light. You didn't run out the door. Holding this space in your heart for this to come home. I know we want to take action, like, get to the streets and do that stuff, but it's all through energy that this stuff came about and it's all through energy that it dissolves into the great space from which it arose. So being in meditation, whatever you're doing, I see people hand with hands on their hearts. That's healing us. Don't underestimate your own power. Your intention is everything. It's huge. Wow. So I didn't even realize that this was, can you hear me? I didn't even realize that this was your first time speaking publicly. All right, live. I know live. So that makes five people at this event. It was their first time speaking on stage. It's really awesome. I didn't even realize that. I should probably do something self-promotional if you wanted to. I want to check out my YouTube series. There's a really precious series. It's like the same kind of delivery here. I go way deeper than my interviews. Series blue slash Rebecca Rose. You can web search that and find the blurb bringing light to the darkness series. You might cry, but you'll also learn a lot of things. In my website, RebeccaRoseBarfoot.com, if you want to check out sessions with me, you can do that there. B-A-R-F-O-O-T is the last name.