We both saw twisters
Wheelmen
The Twenty Third Episode
it's so nice recording at your house jordan because i eat so good over here and you tell me fool my tummy is full it's a regular episode we're at jordan's house jordan hello hello we just had a um was that a crisp? just called a crisp yeah it was good it was so good yeah we took these like leftover peaches from like because we went we always do this we go to we go to an orchard and we um we just get so many peaches like too many peaches you know what i mean? you have to pay yeah it works you pay it's like they do it by a peck it's called a peck but folks at peck it's no it's uh i'm flexing my my huge yeah Robbie's shirtless yes because we went to the pool it's the summertime why would i wear a shower i have to wear a shirt all day at work no one i'm tired of being in this cotton polyester blend prison well you you should get sun shirts because then you wouldn't be in that um anyway i like me shirtless man yeah so we're watching jaws because it's shark week so anyway are we watching it because it's shark week or because i think they no i would rather be watching actual shark week than jaws really with the sound off oh well too bad i don't i don't know what the channel what channel that is the fucking discovery channel i don't know like the numbers the remote has a guide on it i'm not going to sit here watching it earlier i'm not going to sit here and do that while we're while we're recording all right just sit down watch Richard Dreyfus um anyway speaking of movies is it too early go ahead dude all right it's movie time and drew cue the music it's so cute when Jordan goes to cue the music because he gets so animated with it yeah it's like a little kid when you give him like spaghetti was for the first time and they kind of like freak out a little bit so this is gonna be a fun one because i i think we we've been doing some movie shit dude i saw a movie what's your movie that you saw it's all twisters oh why did do i can't wait oh my god yay i'm fucking wow that was Jordan jumped up and went to face me how okay dude all right i saw it uh the pre the pre-screening the day before it came out that me too yeah we did too um so what did you think uh just you know it was fine i thought it was fine too but i want to go over some silly thing it was a lot of fun my general review of it without getting into it is it is we are getting into what he's talking about go ahead no before we get into it my general overview review of that movie is it's a wonderful summer date night movie yeah because i went with like a chick and she loved it so much fun and i was like it was all right the music was awful yeah they picked they picked some bad choices also where was Shania Twain come on now the TV on the radio guy was funny i didn't realize it was so much laughter yeah um okay so i thought the movie was fine and there was a couple good funny parts but it was very no it's a summer blockbuster it's fun you know but it wasn't i don't know it didn't really hit anything that would make it like a good movie for me but it wasn't bad it was fine okay let's let's go into the like i i a lot of fun in it let's go through some silly things okay all right you want to do some silly things one thing i noticed uh-huh so it's basically so basically this girl daisy uh what daisy really jones or whatever i don't know she uh she loses a bunch of friends in the first part of the movie you hear her crew gets sucked up into the tornado but she she survives talk about hawk toa there you go stuck to death um but she she grows up in oklahoma like she's from oklahoma but she goes to new york after that because she's got PTSD yeah anyway but when she goes back to oklahoma i'll call her city girl and just explore her fucking accent thank you yeah yes i this is crazy i clocked that immediately as being stupid as fuck and the only thing that i could think was that like they know that she's from or like they can read her accent and there's making fun of her for leaving they don't actually think she's born and raised in manhattan well i mean that's me maybe being way too generous with like the probably abhorrent script it it's just like city girl well and that was the funny part is like she clearly has this it's not a strong accent by any means but like she's obviously from what what fucking paul shear at the end being the parking attendant at the airport oh yeah that that was yeah that was the best part of that movie yeah and then no but the the scientist guy he wears like the safari outfit yeah i didn't know until after that's the tv on the radio guy oh okay i didn't know that yeah he was funny yeah like the fucking sexy youtube cowboys crew was cool he i love the tyler Owens actor i know you love him because he's you're he's your type of man he is you can write him a lot you could fucking build a house with his head like it was crazy the angles on that man's face i love him we were talking about the movie and my friend was like who's in it like blah blah blah and i was like i don't know i was like no he's the he's the top gun maverick guy literally i said it's new little blonde girl and guy with super punchable face and she was like i know exactly the actor that we're talking about but you like him he's he's got a super punchable face so like you always like him for some we've talked about this with other actors so far i've seen him and i believe two movies being top gun maverick and this he's on a bunch of stuff on Netflix i don't know if i've seen those though yeah the two that i can remember are those movies where he plays the punchable piece of fuck who ends up not that eventually becomes like kind of cool yeah you know what i mean and he is a very good actor and is type casted well because i oh it always elicits a response from me of fuck this dude like if i like i would i would be really unhappy if i ever had to be in a room with any of his characters yeah you know what i mean i don't know i think i'd be i'd you would sit on his fucking well here's the thing too is like halfway through that movie you forget that there's even tornadoes the whole premise of the movie at that point is like you want these two people to fuck they never kiss in the movie it pisses me off so fucking mad that he doesn't flip her upside down into a standing 69 it's fucking crazy she weighs less than his fucking laptop dude he's shooting rockets out of a truck give him a fucking even a dry hand it must have like it must have been so weird that all that adrenaline is pumping in she doesn't just and then just start fucking cranking it down it's fucking stupid right there in the airport he brought her pizza to her fucking hotel yeah that was that being a fucking foot job that's fucking crazy there's so many like like my my thing is is like it was obviously like a weird feminist thing that they decided not to have like a kiss scene or something probably is my that's my guess but here's the thing if you're gonna do that don't spend half the movie building up this sexual i don't know the entire soundtrack was just like weird fucking chick rock it was weird like they could have had so many better choices pop country chick rock yeah i laughed so hard like in the beginning when like the tornadoes were being shown or whatever yeah or something was happening and then it's like this deep orchestral like john Williams knockoff is happening musically yeah and then just panned hard left is just an arbitrary banjo and i'm laughing and the person i went to the movies like gave me a look and was like what are you laughing yeah there's nothing happening yeah i was like i'll tell you well here's a thing but all the songs were just like you can take the girl out of oklahoma right but you'll always be free like that kind of shit that would be an entire soundtrack yeah yeah i mean being tough sometimes ain't easy when you got eyeliner it's so dumb yeah it would i mean because the first one had such dramatically good music and good that soundtrack fuck yeah i can't believe that they didn't like pull off like a better soundtrack like that is something that pissed me off too did you catch any easter eggs from the first movie yes of course dorothy aside from dorothy oh yeah well here's the thing they definitely swapped out sir it was basically the same movie but swapped out it was basically not the same the rodeo scene was basically the movie theater scene yeah you know and then like her the the the tornado running over that town and then trying to find the dog was the same scene as like when it got to aunt whatever her name is his house you know remember yeah i don't know i was bummed out that they didn't do more with like the eating scene yeah you know what i mean right they could have done the fucking steak and the eggs and the gravy yeah you know i'm saying like like that's like the big part of like the first one yeah for gravy so good it should be its own food group right such a good scene there was none of that kind of shit yeah and i was also like i was hoping that there was going to be some like cameo connecting the movies yeah but there was and now also what's with like the data there's always this like all this weird like it's just fake data got to collect the data okay so there's a point in the movie where you find out that like the the first person she's working for there is a point in time where i would have done anything for you yeah exactly that guy i wanted to show pop when his company is supposed to collect data but she finds out that they're working with this land grabber who basically goes to people whose houses have just been hit by tornadoes and then like buys up their land and and like uh and develops it here's the thing though why does he need any data the whole point is just like you wait till the tornado hits a town and then when it does hit a town you go in i i think it's so you can track where they're going so you can already be there waiting i guess i don't know you just sit there and it doesn't make sense Jordan that's the whole point it doesn't make sense it's kind of just like it's what we call a plot hole it's a big plot hole it's a huge plot hole but why does that guy need tornadoes these sort of plot device to get her back there with fucking the tornado wrangler yeah who was yeah i mean i and you know Jesse and i had a disagreement about the one that so the the the one guy did not find attractive i just didn't think it was a joke not not Tyler Owens he was of course you love yes we love him you want to suck on his knees the other guy i didn't i didn't think he was very effective her friend yeah her friend the one the survivor from the that's why he wasn't the boyfriend Jordan he's not hot yeah he was the party guy yeah and then you learn at the end that he went back to his old ways and he was cool because he was eating snacks in his truck oh my god you know what going over this movie now i don't like it yeah no it was fun it was a fun time the best part of the movie was when he when he was in the parking spot and they were like we're gonna tell you and then he puts a shirt on the ground yeah i mean like the best part i don't know it was it was very like violently whatever yeah there was like two or three like quippy parts with like um the bad boys youtube crew that was like okay you guys are like this is funny yeah i'm surprised in ai uh bill Paxton in there man somewhere but he's at least a portrait of him in the background yeah yeah he's just a fucking when they flip down the fucking visor like a picture of bill Paxton yeah no i don't know like it was like i said it was fucking whatever like but it is if you want to go on a date night and you want to get a guaranteed fucking smacker in the parking lot just fucking take a chick to that movie and you will come oh oh i think the point of the movie was so you could take a date and since they didn't kiss in the movie there's so much sexual attention there's so much sexual tension that you're like they didn't kiss so we have to fucking kiss that's it that's what it is they didn't kiss so if you touch my hand i will bust it didn't make me so mad like that they didn't come on there's like they're both hot as fuck just make them kiss it was the age of the characters also like i couldn't figure out yeah because they're like they're in school and then it's a five-year time jump but then the mom talks about how that was grad school and not undergrad and so i'm sitting there trying to be like okay you have this like cushy-ass job with like the national weather reporting service or whatever are you like are you like 25 and like a genius child or are you like 30 but you just weigh as much as a shit that i take like i don't understand what's happening right now yeah if you're 30 then why are you afraid to eat a personal pizza and make out with the hottest man in oklahoma yeah yeah i mean also that that's seen where they're explaining like the the science of the tornadoes did you love that you love that fake science no man fake science is one of my favorite shit dude i know i love it i bet you love did you know speaking of fake science did you know in breaking bad they had to purposefully um write the scenes with the the math off so that people wouldn't watch this show learn how to make math yeah but then the other way around that or the other end of that other side of that coin i guess in um what was that nerd show uh big bang thing big bang theory all the science is like correct yeah interesting and so whatever the weird topic of the episode is like the apartment billboard has like a famous theory related to that topic on it oh that's cool i didn't know that it was just one of those like yeah that was in like one of those stupid like back when cracked was sick like you know 10 things you didn't know about your favorite shows yeah i i'd be interested i would i would be interested to find out you know how like that there's a youtube channel that may has those professionals come on and talk about the movies and see if they're like accurate i want to see if that that in twisters if what they were talking about not one scene i really don't think that in this romantic summer blockbuster they did mass disclosure on how the government knows how to kill tornadoes but just doesn't no i mean just like how it works you know they're like oh yeah you know the updraft that was so funny while they just tried to hamfistedly throughout the entire movie be like it's the updraft going into the crown look at that here comes a low pressure system it's just like that whole thing where everyone's like getting super horny for using fucking college words interesting choice not to uh mention climate change too they were like oh we know a lot of southern trumpers are gonna watch this movie yeah they also did not once mention climate change but they kept on being like the weather's been really different recently anyway yeah find my shirt and they were like and they couldn't mention it because tyler ohin's whole hope of certain poppersona was to like let's see how much gas we can burn he really was just a good old boy i love him dude jordan we know it's going to be crazy when he does like a book tour and jordan sleeps outside for a month there's no line jordan just wants to be there i don't even know that actor's name i just know him as the uh top camaver guy that's it you've been split name have you been saying tyler ohins because that's his character name and twisters oh i thought that was his real life name i don't know what it is that's insane that you just remembered his twister's name that much you're talking about him like he's someone you went to school with now now i just i you know he's one of those guys what other movie stuff i don't want to talk about this movie okay long legs did you watch long legs i really want to see it okay you haven't seen okay that's a different movie time no no spoilers don't work on it's fine i don't know like spoil spoiler but it was great it was fantastic let me answer lovely let me ask you questions then you ready yeah yeah ask me questions bitch inside the robin studio was it good yes was it scary yeah is it freaky yes is it long no are there any good other actors in that movie aside from nicolas cage yes um ish okay mike is okay that's all the questions i have no but i mean i do i want to see it ask more okay no i don't want to okay i i don't want to know a lot about this movie right because i want to fall into a trap like i did with hereditary yes or people like this is the scariest movie ever and it's so fucking good it's a thing it's not that scary and then i watched it and i was like this is not that scary don't go into it it's freaky right it's like a freaky it's freaky it's weird is it like seven freaky no no it's a rit no it's it's original i'll tell you this it's an original concept okay and you'll be like that was tight cool okay that's what it is it's it's not that scary but there are scary parts it's like there's parts where you're like on the edge of your sounds of the lambs no okay i i know why it's compared to like that because the the uh the the promos promotional stuff was very tied to that but when you actually go in and watch it it's very different okay it's great you're gonna love it yeah um is it a movie that you would say like i love this two any questions that you that you would have to see in the theaters or i could like watch that though i would say yes because you want the sounds to be right because that's the thing that's like with the twister's bullshit where it was like i went to see in an iMAX and i was kind of tricked i feel like i could watch at home yeah i well i did the i do like the we done this like this is loud yeah i max the fake thing um any other movies so long soy so in another so long legs is good and i should see in the theaters yes absolutely go see it right now um and what do we watch there was another one we watched we went to we saw three movies in the theaters you went yeah you didn't see Romulus said did you no Romulus is uh i don't know when it's coming out it's in like two weeks okay uh there's a lot of movies coming out that i really want to see yeah i really want to see trap i really want to see Romulus i want to see the new Nosferatu movie yes not i really want to see the new despicable me i don't give a fuck i love those movies so much that nobody's nobody's nobody's fucking saying anything no the person i go to see movies with was like i'm not seeing that movie and i was like you hate me yeah um no there's like a lot of movies coming out that i really do want to see there was some Beetlejuice 2 i want to see oh of day one we already talked about day one because i already talked about bike riders right yeah yeah yeah all right i can't and then at home i haven't really been oh did i tell you uh so there's um gamma you know gamma turtle boy yeah there's a new gamma run netflix like an episode thing like an anime one yeah nice very fun yeah i didn't watch the Godzilla ones why because i they're just like i don't know the animation style is not my favorite but the story is very fun yeah that's a very fun one gamma has like the same kind of animation but it's that one's fun and then through that i learned that there's like a bunch of shit with like like uh what is it ultra man yeah yeah yeah yeah like that whole like school that shit was my jam as a kid well they're remaking all of it or they're doing new versions of all of that on that flick well i have an update steven spielberg apparently cut glenn powell's and daisy Edgar Jones kiss and twisters fuck you steven spielberg put a tool why what's the reason actors cut babe can you read that article and tell us the reason hey intern babe also his name is glenn powell the guy i really like but you know him as tyler oh it's such a better name yeah it's such a hotter name yeah yeah that i feel like that name that was a research the name they probably you know what they probably did they probably brought in a bunch of went hot women and been like what names make you hot and he went through all 17 hot women who live in oklahoma yeah okay jordan you don't have any video game updates no do games anymore man no i i i don't have time man i'm broke so i like can't play any games right now but i'm like waiting for the end of the summer so i can like start buying games again you don't have like the the deal pack stuff no i do i just i i like blew my game load earlier in the year yeah and now i have like things i actually need to like save up for happening and like the later half of you know what i mean yeah and there's also nothing really i've just been you know what you know what it is like i usually have game nights every friday or saturday with my friends and like i've just been doing a lot of fishing stuff you know yeah been going out with friends and doing fishing good man i caught a big ass fish yesterday it's like it was like i think it was my personal best i'm pretty sure do you keep it oh dude i hate every time i say that people ask that i was like you don't keep fish like that's not a thing really yes you do no people don't really think was invented to stay alive i get that but like most people that are into fishing they're throwing that shit back unless it's like they're fishing for trout or i don't know jordan you said you caught a big fish yeah i'm looking at it maybe either you know this is a cool fish i'm not thinking you fucking stuffed it i would have seen it also they'd usually don't stuff anymore they just you know what they do actually when you see that like like the tap quote-unquote taxidermied fish all they do is you get the weight and you measure it and then you you show you show a picture of it and then a taxidermist not a taxidermist a fucking sculptor artist guy will do a recreation of it and paint it exactly the way the fish is and i i couldn't have done that jordan that sounds way more up your alley i kind of want to do we all know you're afraid to give me some money in that no dude no i'm not and don't even to pull this shit because we were on a camping trip and you're fucking stupid ass you couldn't even touch the damn fish yes you i'm sorry i'm not the one who caught a fish and said you wanted to eat it you can you can reflect this all you want jordan we went to we went to west Virginia we went to elkins west Virginia we went camping trip with with our buddy cheese and we caught a fish we were gonna eat it jordan caught a fish yeah and jordan wanted to eat this fish yeah and we brought the fish back to our little campaign and i was completely fine trying to kill that thing you were not fine i was too because you wouldn't do it i was slamming that thing you were not slamming you were not slamming so jordan had the fish like this i know this is an audio medium but bear with me dearest listeners jordan had the fish in his hand and it is alive and he's like looking at it and me and she's like kill it and he's like okay and just lightly tapped it against this rock and it's still alive and we're like dude what are you doing we're like kill it he's like okay and does it again and isn't doing it hard enough and this fish is just being tortured now now and so then we laid it down on the fucking rock and then cheese took a rock and smashed its head to finally fucking kill it and the eyeball popped out and hit jordan in his chest and he freaking freaked out about that and then we burned the fish yeah we ate it though we did eat it was fine um yeah well jordan didn't have the balls kill the fish i had a ball or the idea absolutely you not have a ball this is this is not correct it is it is not how i remember it correct and i've definitely killed fish dude i've never seen you kill a fish i've seen you i've seen you torture a fish no by smacking it like it's a locker you were basically just like a shitty bully of fucking 80s movie dude you were just hate cramming that fish no dude no this is wrong would you go deep see fishing no dude you mean like like jaws like go like a couple miles out and try and get like fucking so i've done that before actually uh but it was one of those like where you pay so on yeah they take you out going out by yourself yeah and i caught a flounder cool yeah one of those fish to have like both eyes on one side and you're like this is how i draw i remember that as a kid you would draw something and you put both eyes on like you just didn't not draw oh jordan i'm a fucking born artist i understand perspective no um the coolest things i've ever caught fishing were as a kid um in the outer banks we would they had like the really long peers and ship yeah i caught a flounder one time and that was cool because it was literally just like like the adults would set up i'm like middle school the adults would set up fishing rods and the kids would kind of just like grab one and pretend to know what they're doing and then we just go play or whatever and i was like sitting next to one and it started to reel and then i like grabbed it and i reeled it in and it was a flounder it was pretty big it was like the size of my forearm did you squid huh did you use like squid remember man all i know as i reeled in a fucking flounder and i was like whoa this thing looks weird and then the other dads and like the party were like hey that's really cool like we're going to go throw it back now and then this like fisherman dude who was like sitting next to us with like a bucket full of fish was like if you're just gonna throw that back and i have it and we're like yeah man and then um that same trip another day i caught a stingray what yeah like a little one it was like you know like the size of like two of your hands like when you're like that yeah yeah yeah yeah got a little stingray yeah have you ever swam with stingrays it's fucking fun uh when we did the cruise thing everyone can say like can kill you that steve erwin shit was like a freak accident don't talk bad about steve i'm the fucking talk i'm not he's calling him a fucking freak no i said it's a freak accident that he died from a stingray or got into a fucking it's a predicament um no i don't know if i i've done the thing where like you put your hand in the water and the the the rays like you know i'm saying they're like glide past i swam with dolphins yeah me too that's just crazy because they spend the entire time being like please don't stick anything in their blowholes ah yeah they do it and then and then they were like hey uh every woman here are you pregnant or on your period and of course everyone's like why would you ask me that that's so rude i'm going to meet to you but then in reality they're like no because like dolphins are like reeling in with like girl stuff like that yeah and they will like swarm you if you're on your period or if you're pregnant yeah and there's all these like anecdotal stories of like people on vacation who like go into those fucking like swimming pools with the dolphins and like the dolphins won't leave like a woman alone and then like that's how she finds out she's pregnant and shit oh damn nice they do that thing where you can give birth and like dolphin pools that's like a real that's like a real deep cut hippie thing is that like so they become mermaids or something yes Jordan and so they become folk of the water and they go back to Poseidon no because you can do like the water birth and shit yeah but then like the dolphins have like a natural like calming effect with humans and like if you give birth near dolphins like the mother's heart rate and like the baby's heart rate is like really stable i mean this isn't like fucking like in like oxford like peer-reviewed journals or anything but like one of those like it's like crystallization could be quasi whatever thing intern babe can you look that up please oh wait wait intern babe um what about the kiss thing from twisters did you read it what did it say what did it say you can't do you can't have intern babe on mic and you're just gonna get mad oh okay yeah uh yeah sure [Music] now bull shit bull shit this isn't some artistic movie dude it's a fucking summer block buster trying to fly to california to explain what a cliffhanger is this do you do you want to kiss him oh i love that that no i i i i like that see he's charming he's a charming guy jordan has a crush daisy yeah she she's she's cool too she was in um uh where the crawdads go where whatever nope where the crawdads sing yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah we're there where the crawdads hang out that's a good movie yeah and book and gay i guess i don't know i didn't read it i think we wrote that book in elementary school yeah i definitely knew about that really yeah all right join we're done say bye oh bye go to patreon go to patreon say bye bye bye patreon [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [BLANK_AUDIO]