Living in fear or living with confidence. Learn the difference today and what that means for you!
Did you hear the voice of the Holy Spirit today urging you to take a step of faith? A step that will help you see that life is still worth living? If you did, then I invite you to spend the next 12 weeks with me, learning how to navigate life without the physcial presence of your child.
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GRIEF ROADMAP $100 OFF (offer ends in 48 hours)
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Fear is defined as an unpleasant emotion or a feeling of anxiety concerning an outcome. That pretty much sums it up, doesn't it, guys? That's grief. In the most pain you've ever experienced, you're probably not going to be able to articulate that, but that is exactly what living without your child feels like. How will I survive without my child? The opposite of fear is confidence. Confidence is defined as firm trust, being certain of the truth. That's not possible for him without the power of the Holy Spirit. Have you listened to the Master Class? It's packed with truth, God's truth. Today, I'm sharing what you have taught me about grief. Are you lost in the chaos of grief, struggling to find your way in the darkness? Are you asking yourself, will I ever be able to enjoy life again? Are you wondering where God is right now? Welcome to the Grief mentor show. This podcast is a safe place for you. It will shine a light into the shadows, helping you discover that joy and pain can coexist, that you still have purpose, and there is a path to peace. Hello, friend. I'm Teresa Davis. I too was lost in the chaos of grief the day my son died. Just like you, I longed for peace in this unfamiliar world. I longed for the wake, crushing my chest to be lifted so I could breathe. I clung tightly to the anger, and it was there that I discovered the tools I needed to navigate life after loss. And I'm ready to help you do the same. If you're ready, I'm holding my hand out to your friend. Let me show you the way one step at a time. How do you feel about music? I grew up in a small little Baptist church with a congregation of about a hundred. I was the piano player back in those days, and the songs we sang were hymns. The contemporary Christian music didn't hit the scene until I was probably in my young teens. I used to listen to Amy Grant. Stephen Curtis Chapman, Michael Deputy Smith. Those names sound familiar to you as well. Well, as I grew a little older, I started to love Toby Mac's music. Toby had a different flair about him, and his music was a little more upbeat, and it was fun, and I love to listen to it. In fact, when he came, when he was very new, he had just kind of split off from DC talk, and he came to my community area here where I live and did a concert on the river. And I remember seeing him and his wife get out of their van when it was time for him to sing, and I saw a bunch of littles. If you know who Toby Mac is, you know that Toby has suffered great loss as well. His son, Truett, who I remember all through the years growing up, because he would allow Truett to record a few lyrics along the way, almost felt like I watched him grow up. And Toby lost his son Truett to an accidental overdose in October of 2019, nearly a year after we lost Andrew. It was a profound moment when I heard that on the radio. It was almost as if I knew him personally, which of course I did not, but since I grew up listening to Toby and watch him go through the stages of becoming successful to the place where he has now, my heart was devastated. I never reached out to him personally, but I watched his grief unfold. And Toby has created some music that has been very comforting for those who grieve. Emotions move us, do they not? It's very difficult, I believe, to listen to music after the death of your child. For many reasons, all of our journeys are very unique, but for the most of us, it's very difficult to listen to music because of the emotions that it stirs inside of us. I remember after Andrew left this earth, I was in the gym one day. I was determined to stay active because that is the last thing that I wanted to do. And my routine was to always get on my favorite machine and pop those earbuds in and listen to music. I had my phone in my hand and my earbuds in my ears, but as soon as I got on that machine and the music started to play, my head went down and it was simply too much to bear. I had to walk out, I had to leave because the emotions that it stirred in me was more than I could manage. I want to encourage you about music because when I'm having a bad day, and yes, I still have bad days, I may start out with a heaviness with my head down, but as I continue to listen to music that really speaks to my heart, I begin to notice my head coming up in my eyes turning heavenward because that's where our strength comes from. If this is you, if you're in that stage of grief, where music is so painful, the emotions that it stirs, it's just more than you can manage. I want you to know you're going to make it. You're going to make it friend. My website is back up. I spoke about that Tuesday reminding everyone if they've been going to my website and seeing a page coming soon that it was taken a little bit longer for the upgrade to my website, but it's finally live now and I want to remind you that there are resources there that I would love for you to have. There is an updated grief survival guide. There is a grief mentor playlist and this playlist is on Spotify. It doesn't cost anything, but it is the list of songs that I have added that have brought me comfort and there are several Toby Mac songs in there. On the top banner of my website, you will find the grief masterclass button where you can also watch that if you weren't able to attend live. While you're there, check out the page for the program that I'm offering you right now. Enrollment is still available up until August 10th. There's lots of details there on that page, lots of visuals that can help you make a decision if you haven't already done so. What I would like to share with you today is things that you have taught me about grief. Every one of our grief journeys are unique, but they all have common ground and that's why we're here right now because we need each other. That's why I want to share with you today some things that you have taught me about grief. This may help you as well. Stacy said, when I met Teresa, it was the first time that I felt comfortable enough to tell someone my true honest deepest feelings about the loss of my 22 year old daughter. Teresa lifted my spirits like nobody else had this whole past year. Even though I'm a Christian and have my faith to sustain me, I still needed some godly guidance that I wasn't finding in books from counselors and other avenues I had tried. This is what Stacy taught me. So often people look at us as Christians like we should have it all together. Like when our child does somehow, we shouldn't suffer as much as another because we have Jesus. In fact, in some Christian circles, it's frowned upon to show your grief as a sign of weakness. Stacy taught me that we should never assume anything about someone who is grieving the death of their child. Lori said, why does God protect and save some from harm, but did not save my son? I've struggled with this from the beginning. Teresa took my jumbled thoughts and struggles and spoke them eloquently. She helped me organize and manage my grieving away that will continue moving me forward. Thank you. Lori taught me that just because we're Christians doesn't mean that we understand the sovereignty of God. Gail said Teresa gives practical steps to deal with the destructive thoughts that are relentless in their attack. She delivers clearly spoken truths with empathy and a heart of compassion. Gail taught me how important it is to have steps in place to be able to manage those destructive thoughts that threaten to destroy our mind and heart. Tammy said Teresa helped me personally reframe my thoughts that I struggled with after my loss. She's been a tremendous source of strength and comfort. She's a genuine soul who blesses others with their knowledge and experience in your grief journey. Tammy taught me that even though I don't understand the sovereignty of God that he can take a horrible awful tragic situation and bring good from it. Rachel said, Teresa helped me stand up for myself during the intense feelings of grief. She's a gift to all who are limping through deep sorrow. Rachel taught me that even strong women need help when your child dies. Susan says, Teresa has helped me work through some of my false beliefs and to apply God's truth and evidence to my son's life and death. In doing so, I've been able to fully lean on the fact that God is sovereign, that my son accepted Jesus into his heart when he was young and that his salvation is not in question because he struggled and he is now free from pain. Even other Christians say things that sting. But because Teresa has also lost her own son, she's able to combine her own life-shattering experience with her deep faith and extensive knowledge of the word to help others. Susan taught me how judgmental Christians can be sometimes. Joanne said, Teresa has been such a big help to me in this time of grief. She's a great listener and encourager. She's given me many tools to help me navigate life through this very difficult time. I don't know how I would have gotten through this early stage of grief without her kindness and wisdom. Joanne taught me, we need someone to listen. Our grief needs to be witnessed and heard. Vazia said, Teresa is very helpful and brilliant in creating empathetic, warm and peaceful atmosphere where you can feel safe to share your loved one's story. While at the same time, feeling understood, validated and comforted. Vazia taught me how important it is to feel safe to share your grief. Tammy said, there are days that the heartbreak is so heavy. I cannot breathe. Teresa helped me to be intentional, to put a plan in place and to keep it simple. Tammy taught me how important it is to have a plan in place around the special days on the calendar and the holidays. When I started this journey of being a grief mentor, I was standing on a line. You know that line, right? That line that fear keeps us from crossing. Where the what-ifs crowd in and take over our thoughts. This is what I said to the Lord when I heard him calling me into this role of the grief mentor to walk alongside grieving moms and dads whose children are no longer walking beside them. I said, Lord, I don't have all the answers. And he said, I know, but I do. I said, well, Lord, what if they don't like me? He said, my love conquers all fear. I said, well, I don't know how. I don't know how to take the steps to get there. He said, listen to my voice. I will lead you. I said, what about money, Lord? Where's that going to come from? He said, I will provide. Friend, the reason that I know what I teach will work for you is because I live it. Are you standing on the line that I was standing on? You know that line that's drawn right in front of you that fear says, don't step over it because you don't know what's on the other side? What are the what-ifs that's keeping you frozen in fear? Have you prayed about it? Has the Holy Spirit given you the answer? But the what-ifs are keeping you from taking that step of faith across that line? Is the Holy Spirit tugging at your heart telling you? This is the step that I want you to take. I started out the show today, giving you the definition between fear and confidence. Let me remind you, fear is defined as an unpleasant emotion or a feeling of anxiety concerning an outcome. And that outcome is, how will I survive without my child? Can life ever be good again? Will ever be able to laugh without feeling guilty about it? Will I ever reach a place where I truly feel joy again? Remember the opposite of fear is confidence. Confidence is defined as firm trust, being certain of the truth. And there's not much that we can be certain about on planet Earth, and nobody knows that better than you. But there is one thing that we can be certain about, and that is the truth of God's Word. It is not possible to have firm trust without the power of the Holy Spirit. As of the time of the recording of this podcast, which is Wednesday afternoon, there are three seats of opportunity waiting for you to say yes. One of them has your name on it. You say, Teresa, you sound confident. My confidence is in him. He's the one that will receive the glory from your yes. That's how I know you're going to make it. When you trust him, when you firmly trust him, the truth of God's Word, it's possible to stop dreading tomorrow. It's possible to reach a place where you can laugh without feeling guilty. It's possible to have true joy and rest that only comes with the peace that is found in the presence of the Holy Spirit. What if you took a step of faith and said yes to join us? I'm praying for you that he has called to make this choice. I'm praying that he makes it crystal clear. And then I'm praying that you will have the faith to take that step. Is this you? Then please accept my gift of a hundred dollars and join us. If not, that's okay. Grab those freebies from my website. Continue to listen to the podcast. Friend facing tomorrow when yesterday was better is a lifelong journey without your child physically by your side. Two are better than one for they help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. I'm here to help you friend. Take that step of faith. I'll be right here with you every step of the way. And that's all I have for you today. So until next time, take care. Did today's episode touch your heart? If it did, would you take a moment and leave a review on Apple podcast? I read every single one. Scroll all the way down past all of the episodes till you come to a place where you can leave five stars. And would you go a step further and write a written review? It would mean the world to me if you did. Would you mind to share today's episode with somebody that you know that needs a ray of light in their grief journey? I would so appreciate it if you did. From my heart to yours. [Music]
