Know Dumb Idea
Ep. 52 - Alien Dumbulus
You are now listening to No Dumb Idea. Welcome to No Dumb Idea. This is me, your host, Dala, joined by, Dable Dang. We'll fix that in post. I think it was perfect. No, I'm going to fix mine and say mine at the same time. I'm trying to join you. Yeah, this is No Dumb Idea. It's a podcast where we talk about pop culture, comic books, movies, video games, and the light through games, discussions, reviews, and improv segments. And Gible Dang, Jim Leadernake, I'm fucking stoked. I'm a big Xenomorph fan. I mean, as y'all probably. Do you guys like the Xenomorph? I am a Xenomorph file. I think I've made that joke when we last talked about Alienware. So, last episode, because we always talked about it. Yeah, I too love Xeno Warrior Princess. Oh, what's your favorite episode? Oh, sorry. I meant Xenon girl from outer space or whatever. I can reference things too. Xenoblade. What the fuck? Hey. Who was Xenoblade my favorite? That's actually a good one. Oh, man. That's a good movie. Who they chose to play Pirate, though? No. Anyways, yeah, yeah. So, the reason I bring this up, though, is, you know, don't, just don't tell anyone, but I got a little, uh, I got a little person, like, down up in Fox that, you know, can leak stuff, you know? Have you earned a little person? That seems so wrong. I don't think that's, yeah, I don't think that's allowed. Well, it's a fetish thing. I'm sorry. Oh, that's okay. That's okay. So, there's something interesting to it. Yeah. It's consented, yeah. Okay. Yeah, they are mine in that sense. Yeah, but they, yeah. Is, is this the, the little gimp you kept describing that you have? That you have a little gimp in your, in your big gimple thing? Oh, that's okay. I forgot about gimples. I forgot about gimple things. It's weird that you named it after me, but go on. It's funny. Yeah. I mean, yeah. Yeah, you know. But anyways, that's beside the point. They were able to send me alien Romulus before it came out, because that movie was coming out soon. They were able to send it to me. However, my internet's not that great, so they can only send the audio. Okay. So I put it on VHS. Thought maybe, you know, oh, it's like, yeah, but let's, let's hear what alien Romulus is. It's very strange that it lives in your basement and it sent it to you through the internet. I would figure it would just call you down. Well, that, well, it was at work. Okay. Yeah, it sounds like it's more of a situation where, where they come over to participate in pretending to do this. So it's not. To live in the. Yeah. They have their own life. It's, you know, yeah, I buy it. I mean, either way, they say, I just have it on VHS. You know, I was able to port it over easily. No problem. Yes. You already pop them. Yeah, pop on the couch and give this a movie or listen before. So if there's anything I could say, I guess. If there's anything I can say, I love leaks. So, you know, anything early, I'll take it, even if it's just the audio. Oh, yeah. Don't worry. I think this whole need would be like a book. You imagine, you know, we know what the actors all look like. So just imagine those actors with this audio. Yeah. All right. Everyone shut up the movies on. Everyone shut up. Everyone shut your mouth shut up. No talking. No noises. We're in the. We're going to watch this in Gibledings Theater. I forgot which episode I brought that up in. But everyone's strapping. Oh, yeah. Everyone put their seat belts on. Wait, we have a leaked movie watching them. Theater. Shut up. Nope. You're too late. Don't let 'em in. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. Scavenging vessel. Then a stroll mile about K-N-O-W-S-T-R-O-M-O. Crew six. Cargo. Scavenging goods worth 1.3 million squetzles. Course the dumpling list. Alright guys. It's me. You're Captain. Captain Houston. You call me Houston for short. Alright. So, thanks for joining. After the cryo sleep. Oh man. There's always a pain in the backside. But I thought it'd be fun. Before we started our debriefing and going over what we're doing here. I thought maybe we can just go around, introduce our names, our jobs. Maybe like a fun fact about ourselves. I know we didn't introduce ourselves before we got frozen. Probably awkward. It's just protocol. I'm sorry. Again, I'll go first. I'm Captain Houston. Houston's the short. Fun fact. I got no thumbs. And that's me. And yeah. Pass it on to the next person. It's kind of confusing. You're trying to point it yourself but it just looks like you're holding your fingers. Yeah. You're just putting your thumbs up to fight. You said it's my Houston. Please don't hurt me. I'm sorry. I'm not a fighter. I'm a lover. Kind of guy. I don't have thumbs. Here. I'll have them in my pocket. I was about to say Houston. Do we have a problem? No. No. Definitely not. What was your name? Your person? My name? Or the other one? Yeah. I can't tell if you're pointing. You look like you're pointing with your thumbs. I'm very strange. Sorry. I always forget. You know, you probably shouldn't gesture with your thumb so much if you don't have any. It was like a more recent loss. I'm sorry. I'll point with my pinky. You lose them because you were gesturing at people? Real rudely and somebody cut them off. I'm not a window. I told you not to cut, not to put your hands out in the space window. Yeah. Space window is for a dog. That is how you lose thumbs. Yeah. Just take it from me. Cold's up hands is missing thumbs. Yeah. I was going to say, are you? Say, bro. We're brothers in arms or brothers in thumbs. Brothers in thumbs. Yes. I'm just missing the human thumbs. I'll take the lead here. My name is Cutter. And I'm here because, you know, I got, you know, I heard the same announcement that people were in need of a crew and I figured I could make a good dollar as a Cutter myself. That's right. That's what I do and who I am. I'm cut. You need if you got something that needs cutting. Yeah. That's up to me. Yeah. Round of applause. Round of applause. What was your fun fact about cheating? Yeah, Cutter. Mr. Cutter. Or Miss Cutter. Fun fact about me. Oh, sorry. He him. Uh. Fun fact about me. I once pierced a man's skull using nothing but a melon spoon. Oh. That's right. Alright. Round of applause. I know it sounds weird clapping with no thumbs, but you know. Alright. Who's here, isn't it? Alright. Fine. I'll go. Everyone's looking at me. Everyone's rugby. Let's see. I was a favorite colors blue. I'm an Aries. Uh, I guess I'll get the fun facts out of the way first. Um, let's see. Pronouns. Those were fun. Those were very fun. Pronouns are Rig B. So I don't know how that works. I'll let you figure that out. Very common. It's the future. It makes sense. Yeah. As we call it, we live in the future. So us in the future also is the present. You know, my job is, uh, let's see. Let's see. That's a bunch of things in his pocket. So I like to collect things. I'm here to, I'm here to, as like, uh, kind of see what artifacts we got and what things I could take and put them in my room and, you know, just stuff everything away in my pockets. Yeah. I don't have a holding problem. Alright. Do you say a holding or a hoarding? Cause I have a holding problem. Is that funny? Cause you ain't got any thumbs. Yeah, we know that. Yeah. Do you say a holding or a hoarding? Sorry. I don't like your fucking attitude, man. Yeah. You're being a little, uh, a little pushy there with them hands with no thumbs. So I was hoarding, you know, people say I have a hoarding issue, but that's not, it's not true. Okay. Stuff small things in pockets. Stuff's breakfast in pockets. Anyways, um... I think he has a hoarding issue. I'll be right back. I think maybe he likes to my food. He scuttles away. I'll go next time. Oh, man. He took my, he took my arm away. Here, pulls that arm away to the pocket. It's okay. I'm, um, I'm the cook actually on this ship. My name is Aline. Oh. Don't say too fast. Wait. I'm, I'm Aline. Do you produce food from your pockets? Well, I'm the chef. I'm the cook on this, you know, here's shit. Right. That's what, that's what space chefs do. We all know that. Well, I just... We've all been here before. Yeah. Yeah. I have, you know, the technology, you know, spatulas and all that of the future. Or, as we call it, present time. For the few treasants. Yes, yes. Few treasants. Well, it was my fun fact. I think I guess, hmm, I once, uh, I once, you know, tried for, to play drums and it was pretty good. I guess, you know. Mmm. It's pretty good. We might be able to put a little band in here where you get bored. Oh, I like the sound of that. Cause I know my, I have my brother here. Yeah, what? He plays a decent guitar. Come on. Come on. Get up there and say something. Yes, I just want to chime in and say, I love human music too. Okay. Thank you. Well, my, my name is, my name's Ferdy. Uh, I was, I wasn't too sure about this, but, you know, ever since we lost our parents, you know, all, all I got is my big brother, Cuddard. And I didn't, I didn't want him to come alone. So, uh, my fun fact. Uh, well, I, well, I really like, I really like, well, um. Oh, not the old world kind. The new kind that are all, they're sick all the time. And that was the odd slime on every day. Oh, I heard whales. The country? Uh, like the country. I'd vehemently dislike the country actually. I may tell you, Brian. Oh. It's very, they're, they're very scary. When they, when they have, uh, when they have, uh, a different type of sporting. Uh, tournaments, they get real crazy. There we go. Yeah. Yeah. It was, you name again, Friday, Friday, Friday? Ferdy. They call me Ferdy. Ferdy. Uh, all right. It's short for fear word. Feared word. Oh, field. Feared word. Gotcha. Gotcha. Feared word. Thank you. Thank you. Great job, Ferdy. You did get it. Good job. We have one more. I see, I see one more set of eyes that hasn't introduced themselves yet. That's right. Sorry, guys. Uh, hello. Uh, my name is Dallas Corbin. I am the first mate to the captain. Pat's the captain's back. Thank you, sir. Thank you. Um, nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. Well, Dallas, I like, I like this guy already. I woke up a little bit earlier and, you know, I've just been tending to the ship while you guys have been slowly getting out of your cryo sleep. You know, as one, as a normal first mate should do. Um, let's see. It's a good, yeah. It's a good first mate. Responsible. Fun fact. Yeah. What's a fun. I knew what the question was. I was just repeating it. I'm a human. Yeah, that's pretty good fun. Yeah. All right. Give it a round of applause for Dallas Corbin. Wait, what? All right. No. Wait a minute. You said you're the first mate. Yes. Gee, you're going to know a lot about this place. Good. Good. Yeah, well, you know, I didn't wake up too much. I think I know about, you know, I probably know the same amount of information that you guys do. So, yeah. You know, I'm excited to be, to be human friends with you and to drink milk together. And, and, and. Yeah. Yeah. In fact, we should have a toast right now to our mission. Yeah. Get out the milk. There we go. Someone give me a glass that I can hold puts it between two hands without thorns. Like, oh, spills it. Oh my gosh. Here. Hold on. I gotcha. I gotcha. Horse it into a mug. Slides you a mug that you can just wrap your fingers around. Yeah. It's yours in the hole. All right. All right, guys. Let me show you how to make an Australian milk, right? Give me the milk, pulls milk in cup, throws cup away, pulls out fosters. There you go. Now you got yourself a nice Australian milk. I like your style. Yeah. Yeah. I like you guys. Meanwhile, meanwhile, cutter is, is pouring a flask full of liquor into the milk itself. Just. It's a good white Russian, but in reverse. Yeah. Yeah. They call these Russian cows where I come from. Yeah. Nice. Nice. You know, passing one of them. All right. Take some of that. Kind of sucks. There's no women on board, but all right. Next scene. Wait, what? I'm a woman. I'm the chef. Where? I live. Aline. Aline. Yeah. Aline. Aline. You didn't notice Aline introduced yourself. I did. I did. Well, I'm the cook before they introduce themselves. I love Aline. My name is. I shouldn't say a lot. I should say. Good day. Good day, Aline. My name's rugby. Hi. You know, if you have a looking. Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. If you have a looking for a little TLC, why don't you go ahead and. Do you want to climb into my scrap heap? I live down in the, in the, in the garbage chute, you know, well, it's not really a garbage chute. I call it like a trash chute or not even a trash chute. I meant, I meant to say treasure chute. Yeah. Yeah. So I don't want those scrubs. I think I'm out. Whatever. Fine. Fuck you. Anyways, anyways, look, I brought you all here. Okay. We're all here. Here's the debrief. We're all here. We got a distress beacon from a ship, a space station called the Dumbulus. It's, sorry, Captain. Go ahead. Yeah. Sorry. You got this. Of course. Everybody, everybody in the systems heard of that. Yeah. Sorry. This. So. This. Yeah. Why at the Dumbulus? What, uh, what's that? It's a space station with, it's like a military base. However, it's kind of gone. It's gone silent with an distress call. Yeah. Usually there's a lot of like noise coming from it because in space you can hear screams, you know, so same thing with this place. Anyways, it's silent. We're, you know, naturally the military is going to come and see what's up. But before that, we're going to go in and we're going to scavenge that. Scavenge that machine. All the nice things. Yeah. Excuse me. I've got a question. Yes, you. Frady. Yeah. Sorry, Captain. I'm sorry, Captain. I'm just. You know, my human, my human ambition. You know, one day I just, I wish I could lead my own crew. No worries. You're DC or whatever. Dallas Corbin. That's the wrong accident. Dallas Corbin. Deuce. Thanks for that. Yeah. So there was a question from Frady. Oh, yeah. So. It's fear. It's fear. Short for fear word. Yeah. So are, is anybody else maybe a little bit worried that whatever reason that they went silent? You know, it's still there. Now don't be worried. Okay. I went ahead. You know, I just went ahead and, you know, there's no signs. Or maybe there might be a sign of life on that shit. But either way it's, it's, it's. Look, I understand we all have human stress and we're all of our human. What are they called? Emotions or other things in our bodies. Feelings. They're making us very stressed right now. But, um, uh, scaredy. Don't even worry about it. All right. Because the captain. The human feelings is hard. I couldn't have said it better myself. I agree. Dallas. All right. So look, we're going to get there to the Demulus in oh 24, six hours. So in the meantime, I want us tomorrow. Relax. Rest. It's, um, just socializing and get ready. Okay. You got it. Ribs and more ribs. All right. Let's get, let's get, uh, the show on the road. All right. Oh, my. Oh, come on. Come on. Come on. Do the thing. Why won't you slide open? Sorry. Oh my God. They mean it scare you. I, uh. Dallas. Fancy running. Fancy running into you here. Oh my God. It gave me a heart attack. Yeah. Heart attack. We're going on this shift. If we're going into the space issue together, I'm going to drop data. Yeah. A lot of fear running through your running through your, what is it? Endorphins. Is that the word I'm thinking of? All these emotions giving you that kind of smell. Your pheromones. Yeah. Yeah. My older brother calls it the stink of bitch. The stink of bitch. I'm not. I would describe it as like the perfect test subject. Sorry. What are you going to say? I'm not trying to be afraid. You know, it's, I'm trying to be courageous for my brother, but it's hard. Yeah. Yeah. Do you have any advice for me? Dallas Corbin. Puts hands on shoulder. The grips really. Yeah. Oh sorry. Sometimes I forget my human strength and other humans limitations. You must work out a lot. No. But thinking about what to do, you know, I think in this situation. You should prove your brother wrong. You're really brave. I don't think that fuckwit knows how brave you are. Yeah. Now Freddie. You know you're right. I am right. I think. Freddie, if you're catching on, I think that you should go on the ship first. I think you should volunteer to lead the mission. Beautiful strapping boy like you. It couldn't be done. Maybe I can finally. I can finally prove that I'm more brave than my brother. Yes. You will stop making fun of me. You will stop making fun of me and saying that her stink like me. Yes Freddie. And then soon we will usher in a new age of human innovation. Yeah. And it will all be because of you. What do you say? Yeah. Yeah. Slowly turns around in a trance towards Dorrigan. All because of me. All right. I'm going to go tell the captain that you're okay with this. Look at me. This is me. Beep beep. Hey, um. Cutter, I see you're like really finely chopping those cheese wedges. Someone say he's cutting them. Yeah. Sorry, I'm not here. I'm not here. Yeah. I'm not here. Yeah. Anyway. Yeah. I, I just, you know, when, when, when I was young, you know, Freddie was still only just beginning to walk. And well, before we lost our parents, my dad was a real son of a bitch. And, uh, one time I gave him some lip and he, uh, picked up the space belt. And, uh. Oh, gosh. That's the spell. The spell. Some would call it the spell. Oh, sorry, stop, stop listening to our tragic backstory. Yeah, we're trying to have a moment here. Jeez. Sorry. Go on. He, uh, he let loose and broke my jaw. Ever since he broke my jaw, anything I ate, it was solid. I'd have to cut it up. Mince it. Ditani. Oh my gosh. He had to be the patient. So when I, when my parents finally died mysteriously. Finally. Um, you know, I knew I had to embrace who I was. I had to embrace who they men who I became. Oh my gosh. So I became cutter. And to this day, I still have to mince up everything I ate. Cause I still got a poorly healed broken jaw. Oh my gosh. You poor thing. I, no, no, I don't need your sympathy. No, it's like, it's, it's just that olive. I see you're having a hard time as you try to cut. You're just rolling here. Let me, uh, get that for you. Goes behind cutter and like, like go style and holds knife. Oh, there you go. You are like soaking wet. Is there, is there a reason that like, is it your sweat? Is it like, do you have an overactive, you're like damp to the touch? Like, Oh God. I'm sorry. What have you been doing? I've got all over you. It's mostly sweat. I think I could use my food being cut too. If you want to come over here. You have cereal. It's fine here. Fuck. It's past the cereal. Can't cut cereal. Fuck. I hate this place. Sorry cutter. Don't worry. I've got it. Starts chainsaw cuts in full cereal in half. Thanks. Thanks. Thanks. Thanks cutter. I, um, I fucking hate space. Aline runs out crying, slips in her own sweat. Oh God. I can still feel her on me. Like, she was gooey to the touch. It's probably a mixture. It's probably Lou. Like, in the original alien movies, you know? Yeah. Yeah. KY jelly. It's probably KY just for effect. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Just go here looking at consulting Madre. Yeah. All right. Let's see. Camera. Hey, wait. Oh. Oh. Who's that? Hey, Captain. This is rugby. This is rugby. This is your room. Let's say behind your, it was the cockpit. I mean, it's like pretty much everyone's room, but you know, this is my office essentially. What's it behind your back? You're holding something door. Anyways, you know, just so you came to see. How far are we from? How far are we from the, from the, you said 24 24. How is this crazy? Yeah. I mean, hours left, you know, before you get there. Okay. Let's wait. Where's my steeple? I swear. I had a great feel right where you're. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's fine. I'd probably got a stapler back in my room, you know, uh, having been able to get. And I know quite the minute though. Um. Cutter. Cutter walks up. What's, uh, what's going on, Captain? Is there something wrong with your, uh, with your space office? I mean, my spot. My spot. Uh, your spot. I was just, I was looking for a stapler. I mean, I know your big thing is cutting, but it's a good chance. That big blue one you always have on your desk. What? Yeah. Well, I don't see it anymore. I think it'd probably be a good idea if the three of us look for it together. Mm. Okay. Sure, sure. Well, I can't find it. Let's, let's, let's go. Let's go check your room. And when we, we have cutter, you said you had a hard time getting in. Cutter can cut our way in to the room. Well, no, we're not going to cut all my stuff. We're not going to cut our way into. No, no, just cut our way in. I could open the door. That's British now. Oh, I could open the door. God, how could I not say that in Australian? I could open the door. I could open the door. I could open the door. I could open the door. Open the door. Open the door. Open the door. Open the door. Oh. Anyway, I could open. I could do that. Right? Open up my room. I could open up my room. Yeah. But, um, that's the thing is this, this, this is too much shit in there. Um, I need all of it. I need everything in there. All the, all the rubbish and. I got to tell you, you know, rugby. You're acting awful suspicious in my years in outer space law, out law space. I, I've, I've learned to tell when people are nervous. So why are you so nervous? Uh-huh. I'm not nervous. I'm not nervous. Look, pal, I think you touch his finger on chest. I think you best mind your own beeswax kata. Right? Takes out two tiny razor blades from pockets. It quickly slashes a pocket. Ha! Oh. Oh. Oh. That's just never mind. That's just spaghetti in that pocket. Okay. You know what? Fell out. Your spaghetti from right here. You know what? I, you know what? I apologize. I thought you had stolen something, so I've cut your pocket open. But now I see that, uh, I think it's just noodles you had in there. Tisk is true. That was my lunch. You know, Houston. You know what? That's on me. You know what? That's on me. I feel like I really feel like a dick now. Honestly. Yeah. Really sorry. I apologize for a cutter over here as the captain. I feel like I'm a bit responsible too. Yeah. Yeah. You two fucking tricks come over here. You try to invade my space, right? Staples pocket back to, uh, back to pant with blue stapler. You over here? Pulls it out. You fucking, you fuck with my pants. That's a nice stapler. Thank you. You fuck with my pants. You try to, you try to cut up all my valuables, right? And then what is this? Did y'all just freeze me just to open, uh, unfreeze me, steal. Sorry. Oh man. Hand on shoulder. Look. We, we, we. Are you, you're a good thief? Why are you putting your hand? Why are you putting your hand on cut his shoulder? Oh, sorry. Uh, see, I got glaucoma too. So it's hard to see. Yeah. Don't touch me. I guess it's not. Sorry. I guess that's being a pilot. Yeah. No, I'm just, I'm the captain. I'm not the pilot. We don't, we take them. We don't have one. It's automated. It's all. Yeah. It's on this computer. Look, man. It's not AI. I just want to say I'm a real human here. Yeah. Oh, no. What in hell? Where the hell you got? I mean, when have you been? Yeah. How'd you come up here so self? I've been here the whole time. I would joke you cut the thumbs off of me. You scared the thumbs off of me. I would make that joke, but I couldn't. Is that, is that a popular phrase for where you come from? Yeah. Kentucky. Anyways, look. Uh, rugby, we need your skills. You're one of the best scavengers in the world. I honor. You know, if you find anything and I steal everything. It's the way you do, still. Well, hold on. Wait a minute. You can't blame us for thinking. Yeah. It's the one thing. So we're going to be suspicious at least a little. I mean, yeah. Dallas, you said something? You had something you wanted to say, Dallas? Yes. Exactly. Thank you. Um, I've just been here. Um, so I got a little bit of news, guys. A little bit of human news. You tell, uh, you know, I got this. I don't know. My favorite guy. It's just this funeral of just prosperity. Blowing through my, my human veins drinks cup of milk to relax. So. Yeah. That's what I'm talking about. Where did he get that? Cutter's very own brother, Frady, has offered or has volunteered to lead the team into the dumulus. Very bravely. What? Wait a minute. Frady said that? That's what I'm always saying. You smell it too? Yes. It's delicious. It's true. It's like salty sweet. Guys, guys, guys, if the bitch wants to prove himself, let the bitch prove himself. If Frady said that, Fred word, feared word himself. Feared word, yeah. He's going to be first one through the door. Every door. It doesn't matter. All right. Well, I guess I got to trust him. If that's what he said, we'll see. I guess I'm just a little more upset by how freely you're just calling everyone a bitch now. Like, I didn't call him a bitch. Like, do you just call your mates bitches? My brother? Yeah. Yeah. His brother, yeah. Oh, you mean the captain? Yeah, no. I gave him permission. That's on me. Okay. Okay. Oh, yeah. Because that's what he smells like. I swear. Yeah. It's true. Cut to a scene where Cuddy gives Houston permission. Is that the cutter? Hey, by the way, I'm trying to like kick my brother's ass a little bit and get him to stop being such a little wimp. So like, I like to tell him he smells like bitch. So if you can work that in, conversations, it's going to help a lot. Wait, you guys? Hey, all right. It's confusing by human emotions. You guys just started saying that right after we discuss not calling him a bitch. What? It's true. Like what? You can't get permission asked to get the permission. We were reminiscing. You know, reminiscing. That was a memory. It was a thought. Yeah. Stop. Stop. Stop spying on my memories. All right. We pulled it up on our AI. Yeah. We could do that in the future or the president. Yeah, we beam we beam our memories into the computer screen and we all just watched it. On the Wi-Fi. Anyway, look, we're we're about to get at the domulus. Everyone get like it. Oh, is it time for positions? Yeah. Right. Pulls out a bolt cutters, pulls out a chainsaw, pulls out a pair of sternum bone cutters. He's like, all right, let me, let me get up towards my seat. All right. I'm ready. The paper in pockets picks up trash. Rifles through bin eats leftovers, steals milk. All right. I'm ready. Oh, no. You stole Dallas milk. Slowly, feardy, like kind of shuffles into the, to the sitting area and the main cockpit. And he's, uh, are we, are we getting ready to go? Yes, we are. Damn straight. Be a little bit. Yes. All right. Don't you call me that because I'm going, I'm going to show all of you. Yeah. All right. I'm going to, I'm going to find the treasure in this little here, this, this, this, this, a clam shell here. I'm going to find the pearl here. Hey, fucking things. All right. Show us. Couldn't find a pearl in his own ass. I'll tell you what. All right. I like this. I like this new attitude from your fairy. Aline comes out of her room, like covered in like flour, like the driest stuff you can see, like a powder. It's like, Oh, I'm, I'm ready boss. I also have a, I must you always be covered in stuff. You, I was, I was a little nervous last time. It was a little wet. So I used anti lotion. Baby powder. So you want to say you turn. Yeah. You see you turned yourself into a powder donut. I mean, yeah, I'm a chef. Yeah. That's fair. That's true. All right. Look, let's powder. Yeah. Aline must be a baker, in fact, this might even be better because now we can use your tracks kind of like Hansel and Gretel, you know, that's true. I kind of stole a stole her tracks. We all look, we all look at all her powders already gone. It's like all off of her body already. It's just pockets full. Well, I might, it's, it's cause I might need to use the flower latest. I'm just, I'm going to have to, I need it. I'm going to, I'm, I can't get rid of it. So just. Hey, I don't think any of us are going to have a complaint because let me tell you, she did not need to be covered in something again. That was weird. Yeah. Fair, fair. All right. Look, we're going to, so we're going to, our ship is docked and we're about to enter. There are two different paths. We're going to love talking. Sorry. Yeah. I could tell. What? Anyways, split up. I think that's a great idea, Captain. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. We're going to split up. All right. Frady, you're going to be leading one team. Oh, right. I can do it. And I'll go with it. They'll also come with me because he's the only one who believes in me. Yeah. Alene, you come with me too. I'll go too. Yeah. I'll go too. Because they don't really, you know, I don't know. I need maybe any of my powder. I don't really care for cutter no more. Fuck, bro. The only chair. My brother. I'm sorry, Alene. My brother can be a real son of a bitch sometimes. No worries. Rugby turns to a cutter. Fucking hell. That guy. The team of dogs are the ones that get the chicks. The chick. You fucking kidding me? No, honestly, no, honestly, honestly, it's probably better that way. Honestly, I think fear you'll probably get a better along with her than any of us at this point. So let's let it be. We'll be team get it done. You know what I'm saying? I'll be taking rugby and cutter with me, and we'll go down the left hall to the science labs. And I'll cut the doors open so we can gain access. All right. So perfect. Snips, snips, snips, snips, snips, snips, snips. Dallas pushes him forward. All right. All you. All you. Go ahead, buddy. Yeah. Yep. Yup. You know what Alene shoved? You go up there too. Come on Alene. We got this. We got this. This is all right. I'm just going to shake, shake, shake, or crack, shake, shake, shake, shake. Holds up. Close, stick. All right. We got this. We're going to figure this out. Let's show there's something that's valuable in here that way I can buy my safety for good. Oh, yes. See you. You're going to leave here in one piece. Both of you guys. I just want to be as humanly reassuring as I can. Both of you guys are going to make it out of here. Okay. Thank you. Thank you. I'm very, very, very sure. My brave soldiers. Yeah. I was raised without parents as an orphan, so I don't really understand if that's how people talk. But I believe you and I appreciate your support, but it's real nice. Guys, guys, I'm getting, I'm getting something on the motion track trackers ahead in the room. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. Wait. Wait. That's okay. What do we do? What do we do? We got it. We got to see what it is. I got it. Yeah. Oh. We see like a scamper, the thing moves and like always, there's something out there. Test subject one through the glow stick as expected. Perfect. What did you say, Dallas? I'm sorry? Dallas, did you say something? I'm sorry? Did you say something? I'm probably behind us and at a muttering level. Yes. Dallas, here's that milk that you told me to make sure I bring. Thank you. I really milk junk junk. It's like a whole, it's a whole too, like too. Gallon. Gink, gink, gink. Ah, wow. That's a big, some kind of thirsty, huh, Dallas? Yeah. You really got what they call human thirst. Oh, yes. Human thirst. I drink the regular amount of human milk. Well, not human. Well, yes. Human, you told me to bring more too. Is that why you put your name on all of those bottles? It's human milk? I don't think that's his name. Or is that the city it came from? Humane. Dallas. Boy. Boy, I found something. Check this out. All right, guys. Oh, wait. This is a cool science lab. What is that? It's like a little... It's like a... It's like a... Check it out. It's like a little... It looked like it might have held like a... Like a... Like a snack or something. You know, I bet... A snack. Oh. That's... Yeah, I'm just gonna keep this. I was just a rapper, bro. I thought that was... Oh, are you sure you won't keep that? I think it might be trash. Oh, I need it. It's not... Look, look, look. You wanted me to... Yeah, no problem. Look, you can keep it. You can keep it. I'm the best scavenger in the fucking universe, right? You wanted me on this goddamn ship. You're gonna have to, you know, let me just scavenge away and then we'll sort through everything. And then I keep the rest and, you know, that's kind of how it goes. Okay. Sure, sure. The real question is, has anybody found any, like, lockboxes or chests or... The door to this fucking place was open, so I didn't get to cut shit. Yeah. If you want, there's like, there's stuff... There's a scalpel right here with this little crab thingy, which I don't know. It looks pretty normal to me. Ooh. It's like a face crab thingy. Oh, but it's got like a shell that I could cut open. We can see what kind of creature this is. Maybe this is what they were studying here. Oh, true. Yeah, maybe we could scavenge that. All right. Gets out. Gets out circulating bone saw. Mm-hmm. Just then an old man in a lab coat, bro. Ugh! Wait! Don't do that! Holds up, coder. Don't you get away from your eyes. Oh, I don't have shit. I wasn't stealing anything. No face off, like, in that action movie. No! Face off. Oh, yeah. That's super old. How do you know? I'm old and I don't even know that movie. I don't know. Look. I study old media. Anyways. Yeah. It's a minor invention. Anyways, look. I'm a scientist from this dumulus. Cut that 'cause it's got acid for blood, you know. Chew through the fucking hole. Chew through the hole. The whole ship that is. The whole ship. It's got acid blood. That sounds pretty fun. Yeah. What is this thing? That's sick ass, bro. What kind of acid are we talking about? Yeah. Are we talking about the kind of acid? Oh. Wait a minute. LSD? Like the good shit. I haven't had any of that since, like, the '70s. No. No. No. No. It's the bed. Yeah, maybe we should cut this open there. Oh. Yeah. I think we should. Yeah. Let's cut that fish. Let's cut that fish. Yeah. Yeah. We're scavengers. You know, we're taking this to kill this fucking old man. Yeah. Tie him up or something. We're going to get the LSD out of there. No, wait. Look, I have some information that's up behind him holding a knife to an old man's throat, but also rugby is sinking wet. Oh, why are you so wet? Oh, I don't even worry about it, bro. I'm so fucking excited. Look, look, you guys got me. I'll spill the beans. The Domulus, as you know, is a military base where we get these aliens called Xenomorphs, but we've been experimenting and trying to make them better soldiers and weapons. We even made some that can talk. They're just so, but they're so fucking evil and their blood is acid and if you cut them, they're going to... My chest. Oh, what the fuck? What the fuck? What is this? Shit! I think I have... Maybe I had some bad acid. You need to cut back on your sodium intake, bro. Stop trying to break free, bro. You got got you in a headlock. You can't even fucking leave anywhere, bro. Holy shit! Oh, fuck it. Don't worry. Yeah. I'll vent the pressure and I'll cut his chest open. Who's a... Whoa! The chest person comes out and goes... Oh, my god! What the fuck is that? Oh, what the fuck was that? Oh, my god. I think I'm gonna... I think I'm gonna... Yeah, I'm gonna... Don't... Don't cut the... Don't do that. Meanwhile. Or pew. Right into this guy's cut. Head over... Head over heels by tears for fear starts playing like bam, bam, bam, bam. Oh. Oh, my bloody god. What the hell is that thing? I gotta fucking have it. Come back here, little guy! Oh, wait. It throws... It throws corpse to the floor. You have a little buddy, come on! Come on, I just want to get me to keep ya. No, don't do anything! Don't go! Oh, shit. He just went after that thing. He's gone. Oh, fuck. Alright, I guess it's just me and you. We're gonna have to... To figure out where you went. Yeah. The calms are down too, so we'll have to kind of... Figure this out step by step. We can't reach him. Alright, let's go. Let's go down this hall. Alright, let's go. Rugby runs back. Oi! I think I know where it is. I'll be right back. It runs away. Alright, guys. I think I'm kind of getting scared and spooked. Maybe we should have... We should have had back. Yeah, what do you think, Fierdy? I mean, you're the... You're in charge here. No! I'm not heading back until I've got proof of what we saw so I can show my brother. But... I know this one section of the station's flooded with water. You guys are doing good. I'm gonna go in there. I'm really proud of you guys. What's... Dale, it's really far back there. Yeah. I'm observing. You're gonna stay? I'm just observing. Oh, okay. Alright, we'll call for help when we need it, okay? If I say Idaho, you gotta come help us. Yeah, you gotta... Cause, yeah. I have your mouth, though, too, so don't forget. You gotta come to me if you need it. We do have it. I'll follow each of the ends of the space station, Fierdy. Alright. Alright, so wait for this water. Oh, god. It's so... It's so... Do you like... There's oil in it. Go to your left. I can't. Move closer to your left. There's... There's a doorway here. Okay. Yeah. What's... It's gone there. It's kind of dark. You have a flashlight. No, no flashlights. No flashlights. No flashlights. Here, I'll just use my phone. Oh, that's smart. Yeah. No service, though, unfortunately. So, but I still got... I still got battery for flashlight. That's good. Oh, man. What is this? Slowly approaches large, like, gooey... Like a wall construct? Yeah. Suddenly, um, suddenly, fear these phones starts to ring. Like... It's a Dallas. Oh, the hell is. Wait a minute. Oh, he's... Yes, sir. Then here. Uh, um... Hello. Hey, you gotta touch the wall. Just take your... Touch the sticky wall. Touch the sticky wall. Oh, yeah. Yeah. How's he notice the wall? Are you FaceTiming him? Are you FaceTiming? But you're on the phone like it's... Oh, guys. What do you hear? Oh. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It's just a far in the corridor. It's far, far, far, far. Oh, all right. You need to get a sample of whatever's on the wall for me. Oh, man. All right. So, let me just get this little... I'll get this little... little can here. Yes. Oh, I have an empty milk jug for you. Oh, perfect. Yeah. There you go. I'll just scoop some of this. I'm not a milk jug. I need the milk jug. I guess I'll have to... I need the milk jug for later. What's attempting? Yeah, for milk. I guess. For refills? Look, I got some on me and I'm used to gooey, but this is gooey, if you know what I'm saying. This is like where you actually gooey. Do you feel that? I think... Do you feel that in the water? What was that? I thought that was you playing too? Like, footsies. What the hell are you? No, something just went up. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. And then suddenly Dallas pops up. Hi, guys. Duh! Oh, what? Dallas, Jesus. Do you feel just a little human trick? Just a little human trick. Yeah. You scared me a little. Jeez. Oh, my gosh. Well, we got the sample. We got the slime for the sample. Yeah. She won't take this back to everyone else then. And then Dallas takes the samples. Yes, but I believe that I'm going to be the only one making you back to the team. And then Dallas pushes them into the sticking. Oh, my gosh. So gross. Oh, no. Dallas. Dallas, come back. Oh, this is stickier than the floor of the boy's orphanage. Dallas walked. Dallas walks away. I don't want to know what orphanage is. You're a friend. Whistling the harlow goes for your driver's theme. Nice. How can you do that, Dallas? Wait, I think it is. Fearty. I think I see him coming back. Wait a minute. No, that's not Dallas. I think it's got like biomechanicalism on him. Is he? Is that? What is that thing? What? Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. Hold on. Hold on. I'm almost through this last door. All right. Cool. Thank you. All right. All right. We can hit this way now down this corridor. Oh, my gosh. You have a cousin named slicer. Oh, my gosh. We go back in high school. He slices a little. We have similar techniques. We grew up together. We practice together. Our techniques together. Small galaxy. Small galaxy. You should meet Crusher, my uncle. Oh, man. Oh, man. Son of a bitch. I mean, he left years ago and abandoned all of us, even though my parents were dead because he never stopped working. Crusher? He never stopped working. That must have been Crusher. That man's going to work himself into the grave. Jonathan Crusher? Yeah. Jonathan Crusher. Bloody fucking hell. What is fucking small? Mate, that's my bloody cousin. Crusher? Wait a minute. Are we like... Are we like... Are we like... Are we like... Are we like... Are we like... Are we like... Are we like... Are we like... Are we like third cousins? Which is... Which is why this accent kind of flips back and forth between like comes and goes. Because you probably had a lot of people related to me who were speaking with you know. Sometimes my ambiguous southern accent. Sometimes this accent almost turns into a southern accent at times and I think I found out why. That's how that works. We might be related. Yeah. Wow. What a fucking... Revelation. That's... Cool. Wow. Did you guys hear that? Oh yeah. That's right. I forgot that we were chasing the Xenomorph and that I was trying to hunt the Xenomorph and find it. Wait. Oh yeah. Anyways. The house is a Xenomorph. It's the thing that the guy described earlier. You weren't listening, bro. Oh yeah. He did describe it. I was. I'm sorry. I did. Yeah. I forgot. Anywho. Anywho. It looks like the... It looks like the little critter. It looks like this little critter might have gone through a crate. Wait. It sounds like something bigger has come in. Yeah. Wait. Yeah. Let's... Shit. Let's get behind these pipes and hide. Dude. Alright. Alright. Get ahead of the pipes. Oh, shit. Okay. I don't like hiding guys. I get really claustrophobic. I'm sorry. Wait. Wait. Shit. Look. There's two of them. You can hear something. I think they're... I think they're... I think they're talking. The wife is nagging me every day. She just says, you know, you go. You go to the hive. You spend your time there all the time and just... You come home and you don't even pay attention to the face hug. And I said, look. Look woman. I'm tired. You know, I just... Uh-huh. I'm working all day. I'm working at work just to survive. And I don't know. I feel you. I feel you, Jim. It's like... And that they don't even appreciate the fact that I'm doing all this for them. You know, this is for the hive. You know, I'm doing my part. But no, it's still not enough. No. It's crazy. It's like a... I just ate. Wait. You choose. It's me, the captain's, you know, fucking... What's... What's the update? Give me the card, Derek. You were still looking for people. Please. Yeah, we hope. You said you heard noises down here, but we hate. We ain't found nobody yet. No. Just keep... I hate hearing people, so keep an eye. Or lack of eyes. You're hearing us. You're hearing us. You say that all the time. Look. I say that. You don't believe in me, then it's going to happen. And then who's got the egg on their face? Not me. Is we better be getting over... Oh, we better be getting over time for this. All right? You're getting over time. Don't worry. I'm working with you. The queen, uh... Face huggers to take care of. I do too. We better be... All right, look. Keep patrolling. I'm gonna go check out Quandranzy. How will you fucking layer if you see something yell? All right. Bye. Jeez. It's got a nerve. The nerve of people. How do they make that? How do they make that guy a captain? I think... So many people in the hive. So many Xenomorphs in the hive. Derek, it's crazy. Let me tell you. Let me tell you. I don't think... I don't think that guy was a chess buster. I think... I think you might have been an asshole buster if you know what I'm talking about. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's fucking guy railing me all big. Dude. Oh, bro. Jeez. It's so scary. Scary but relatable a little bit. I get it. Yeah. Yeah. The dirt guy did seem like an ass. Oh my God. Wait, guys. I think it goes through the same things we do. Guys, look. It's the little... It's that little fucking Xenomorph. It's scurrying around down there. It's gonna scurry through. I think... I think I'm gonna go get it. Yeah. I'm gonna get out. I'm gonna go get it. Right now. Be careful. Be careful. Hey, who the fucking mister? Guys, I'm Beck. Cutter, I'm gonna cause a distraction. Don't worry, guys. I'm Beck. Oh, he's just a human. Just give me a quick time. You're really good at your job. I don't think they sold me. Tiny mouth. I'll be shit. It's a human. Up the little mouth. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's a human. Oh, I don't fucking... Don't talk back to me. Get back in there. Get back in there. Fuck. - Run, run, run. - Get him, get him, get him. - Get him, get him, get him. - They kicked your spot in fucking case. - Run, run, run. - Come on, come on, come on, come on. - Come on, come on, come on, come on. - Get him. - Ah, they got me, guys. (groaning) - Hey, we're other aliens. And we're, we're, hey, we see them too. We're running in. - Hey. - Hey. - God damn it. I told you guys to yell if you see them. It's me, Gary. God damn it. Get him, I, I'll get him blushes. I'm the big henchman, alien. (laughing) They took him off. - I think he feels so. (dramatic music) - Put the Harlem Globetrotters thing. Wow, now that I have this subject right here, you know, I could go back and observe the bodies a little bit later, see what happened. And you know, oh my God. - Slowly, a figure shuffles in from the darkness. Missing, missing arm, missing leg. One leg, one arm. Dylers, you left us. - Oh my God. - You left us to die. - Wow, look at you. You're hopping over. The perfect, you got one leg and you're hopping over towards me. Wow, come here, boy. Come on, come on. You got this, come on. - I'm gonna get you this last thing I do, Dan. - Good subject, yes. Good boy. Come here, come to me. - You, I'm gonna kill you. I swear I'll buy your legs off. - Come on, you're almost there. - He trips, he falls in the water again. He's like bubbling, he's like. (gasping) I can't believe you did this. Why, why Dylers? Why? (laughing) - Well, you see, it's, I was programmed with, you know, to, to, you know, further the advancement of humankind, which is why we're going on this mission, seeing what artifacts we could discover from the dummy list. And so. - I couldn't have healed. - I guess I listened more to the making humankind better and not the actual part of the plan, but I took that as experimenting with the xenomorph DNA and I don't know, I guess mixing a human. You're mixing it with human DNA and seeing how we could kind of, you know, I guess that's just kind of the plan. - Dylers, do it to me. Do it to me, I don't want that. Make me, make me a xenowar your princess. - Hmm, well, I guess I have one question for eating. - Yeah. - Did one of those little, little creepy crawlies happen to crawl on your mouth at all? - Yeah. - Hmm, checks launch. - So let's say, okay, so that was about like an hour ago. So you think your cycle might be like. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Okay. (coughing) - Oh my God, my baby come here. - Picks it up. Hello, you are just cute. - Yes, I am your mother. - Oh my God. So this must be the human emotions that they were talking about. I never knew that I'd experienced a joy of childbirth and this is insane, this is insane. - What am I going to call you? - Dirty. - Okay, I've got to go take you back to your family. Scutters await. - A lean, just kind of fucking hobble over. - Is she also missing an arm in the shack? - Like in the shack? - No, no, no. (laughing) - No, she's like. - That son of a bitch, you fucking tricked us. But literally, you know, I had enough powder in my back pocket that wasn't stolen that I didn't get stuck. All right, I'm going to give, I'm just fucking, goes off into like the shadows. - I don't know if I just want to keep doing this, just working for the queen and just, you know, every day, it's just the same thing, same thing. - I hear you, Tim, I hear you, but you know, if you don't get the pork and now, you know, you'll never get to retire me, you know? That's what we're all really working for, right, Tim? - Oh, ow. - Guys, guys, you're actually doing what? - Yeah. - Wait a minute. - You know, push his cutter away. I'm so glad you're safe. I've been worried about you before. - Yeah, same, I mean, I'm glad to see some other. Where's, what happened to Houston? Where's Houston at? - Oh, well, Houston, yeah, Houston guy, eight. - Ah, fuck. Oh, Daddy, I honestly, I just kept running and I'm-- - Well, I'm assuming he, we lost him back there. - Yeah, but we got this guy, look at this little guy. He's holding the, you know, more... - Oh, oh. - Oh, look at my, it's neck, like, too. Look at him. He's screaming. It's like flailing around its tail, it's constantly, like going like, "Get out of my face, Jesus, oh my gosh, those things almost try to kill me." - Wait, Alene, wait a minute, Alene, where's Fertie? Where is my brother? - Yeah, he was pretty damn brave. You could definitely see he's not a bitch, but unfortunately, Dallas Corbin tricked us and got him killed. And he has one of those Xenomorph things. We gotta get rid of Dallas, we gotta, somehow. - He's gonna do something with one of them things. - Yeah. - He killed my brother. - I mean, we have one, but I guess we could sell ours. - I'm not selling, this is mine, this is valuable. This is mine. - I did another one, once I killed Dallas. - Don't, hey, you fuckers, don't look at him, this is my boy, all right? This is my valuables. You're not taking this from the efforts, look. Don't put him too close to your face. - Oh no, trust me, I got a gorilla grip on this little guy. He's turning blue a little bit, I have to release it every once in a while. - Yeah, he's not doing that, dude. - Chill, I don't know. - Yeah, I think I'm proving. - My break is the acid. - I think I'm preventing it from growing, Fruley. So, you know, this is okay, it's okay. - Yeah. - It's like a watermelon when you put the things on the watermelon and shape it. - I guess, I guess that a water kind of. - Look, I don't know how to steer a ship. The captain was only when I knew how to steer the, like ship through the AI. I think we'll just have to use the skate pods and crash, I think legit crash through dummy lesson to this planet and let it in the window. - All right, we got to do it then. Let's get back to the cockpit so that we can start steering it down towards the planet. - Yeah, all right, let's go. - All right, everyone's up ahead. - Quietly. - Yeah, we gotta go quiet. - If they can't hear you, they can't see you or something like that. They're like dinosaurs, I think. - Well, they don't have, yeah, they don't have eyes, so I guess they don't, yeah, they can't see us. - Hello, human gods. - Those guys, they don't hear us, we're fine. - Hello. - Oh. - Now... - Dailish. - Corbin. - He's out of a bitch, you left me to die. And he left his brother to die. - You killed my brother, didn't you? - It was your brother? - My father. - Fertie. - My brother Fertie? - The one you just went with? - Fertie. Fertie, I didn't, I didn't kill Fertie. - No, no, Fertie is good, you know? He's just moved on to the next stage of his life, you know? He's a lot better than he used to be. He's a lot braver, he's a lot taller, biomechanical. Why don't we go ahead and say a bring out Fertie? Oh my gosh, what's that? - Hello, brother. - No, you don't need to go out, you don't need to talk to Fertie. - He's a combination. - I can understand if it's a little hard to talk to Fertie right now, given the circumstances, but you know, anything you want to say to your brother? - You've turned him into a monster. - I'm not your brother. - I'm gonna kill you, I don't need to talk to him no more. - Starts chainsaw. - Come over here, Dailish. Corbin, I'm gonna cut you another asshole. - Well, looks like you're gonna have to get through my army before you get to me. And then, shit, he's got... - That's right, and we're here too. - And I guess we might be getting overtime for this book. I don't, I, God, I want it, I want it over time. Stop wearing a battery now, they're fucking right here. Let's get on. - All right, everybody. New plan, throws chainsaw at the group. Run, then we all have to turn. - What the fuck? - Chainsaw, guys. Fucking hell, I gotta get the bloody chainsaw. Oh wait, no, no, I don't. Okay, no, it's fine, it's fine, let's go. - No, leave, leave, leave. - Leave that one. Trust me. - I grab a... Grab rugby by the other way. - Come on, yank them with this. (upbeat music) - Yeah, they all Benny Hill made a fucking quarter as a Xenomorph's chasing. Giant Derek chasing rugby and... - Get 'em, come on, get 'em, boys. - Get 'em, boys. - I'm a few of us in my knees later. - You better be increasing, I'm medical insurance for this Derek. - And overtime. - And overtime. - Oh, gosh, thank God, we're in the fucking cockpit. Okay, close the door, close the door, close the door. - All right, look, I'm gonna set the spaceship to collide onto the planet down below. So, you know, guys, get ready and we're gonna book it after this and we'll be able to get into that skate pod alone without a Xenomorph 'cause I should have played out. Okay, no Xenomorph. - No, no, no. - You played out. - You're not letting anything in there, not your little guy. No way, no high. - Yeah, no on it. - You hear me? - No, at all. It won't be ironic, even. - He's not getting in that thing. Not long enough. - Mm, man, look. - Is there at least-- - I will throw you off entirely if I have to. - Is there at least another skate pod I could take? - No, no. - It's only one. - Look, fine, fine. I knew this-- - Launches all the other skate pods so that they're not available. - I knew this goodbye to your son. - I knew this day would have to come sooner or later, all right? Just give me a little word with my son, okay? - No. - All right, you're gonna have a few minutes while we start getting this ready to crash into the planet. - Yeah, and then you're gonna hear the time countdown like in by a woman's voice when you'll know where they get going. - Now look, rugby junior, okay, a footy. I call you footy. Look footy. You've been a... I always thought I needed you in my life, right? You always give my life purpose in the last 10 minutes. And, you know, I've never really had a son, but it would be, you kinda gave me a glimpse into what being a father would be like. And I'll never forget that. - Oh God, I'm gonna have to let you go. I think this is my bloody character. I think I have to learn not to steal things all the time and let things go. - It's okay, man. - I'm okay. - Oh, fuck, you could talk and then it snaps his neck. Oh, fucking hell! What the fuck was that mean? - Yeah, no, I understand. As soon as they talk, they're way less cuddly. - Fuckin' get rid of that shit. All right. I'm a new person now, guys. - Guys, let's go. - Yeah. - Everybody ready to run? - Yeah, we're just gonna let it out of the door to run. - Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go. - Fuck. - I'll be finally made it, if I... - Oh my gosh. All right, and look at it, the ship just exploded on that planet, that random-ass planet, okay. - We're safe, guys. Hopefully there's more on this. - That's for you, figureity. That was for you. - You know what, rugby? I like the way that you were kind of like a father figure. It's kind of odd, you know? Get a neck. - Yeah, I didn't expect to see that side of you. - Okay. - Yeah, I like the way you snapped its neck as a good love and father would for something. It's kind of freaky like that. - It's kind of inappropriate just from all the things that we just went through right now, and I think I just need like a minute to process just by what's happened. Like, like you said, like I just became a father and had to snap my neck, my son's neck, and I didn't think that was necessary. - All of a sudden, it's... - And after D.J. Act, I thought, you know. - I thought Ferdy, I thought Ferdy was gone. All of a sudden, I'm smelling bitch all over again, jeez. - Hey, I cut her, I think, should you be saying that as the HR, I don't know if you should be saying that. - Yeah, well, I mean, I think the captain was our HR. - HR person, he's dead now. - Dib's on captain, Dib's on captain of the escape park. - Second mate, first mate, first mate. - How about that? - First mate. - First mate, you're the chef now. Sorry, cut her, the chef. - Yeah, you're now, yeah, so you have to cook. - Well, it leaves the trade chef, even though she's always wet. - Yeah, but she called first mate. - Yeah, I called first mate. And all we have is milk, so you better know how to make stuff out of milk. - In fact, make us Australian. - Let's both, I'm general, I'm general. - So, rugby says milk. I love milk, it turns, and winks a camera. - The trio have successfully escaped, setting the W-list on a collision course for random, planet, LV-426. As the trio's have escaped, we jump straight to the Karini W-list. - Honey, honey, look, look, I know, I don't have too much time now, it's just, the ship is crashing, and I'm so scared, and I never got the chance to tell you how much I loved you, and how much I love the kids, and just, I'm so sad that I'm never gonna be able to see you guys again, and just, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry for everything I've done, it's just, I just want you to know that I'm gonna be thinking of you. - This is awkward, this is where I'm gonna die, I should probably tell you, I fucked your wife, so while you're making that message, could I also hop on there so I could-- - She's the queen, yes, we all fucked my wife, what are you talking about, there's only one woman here. - Oh, okay, it's cool, it's cool. - Of course it's cool, you and Terry, and Geronamis, and Dorthus, and everyone else is fucking my wife already. - You know, I didn't quite understand the whole thing, but now that you've explained it, I think that makes more sense, oh, really, Jimothy too, shit. - Oh, yeah, oh, yeah. - I didn't realize this, oh, okay. - Tell her to say hi, was it again, was your name here to your, Timmy, Timmy? - What, I'm Timmy? - Oh, Jimothy? - Timmy, Timmy, he's Jimothy, I'm Timmy. - I'm Jim, yeah, I'm Jim. - Queen? - And we all look alike. - My queen. - Hello, yes, my queen? - Hello. - Yes, my queen, my queen, my queen. - Yeah, tell her, tell her, tell her you're hi. - It's me, you. (soft music) - Yeah, well, shit, guys, that was cool. That was not what I expected from Eileen. - I guess neither, I did not think Dallas Corbin was gonna betray them like that, that was crazy. - I kind of, I don't know. - Yeah. - Typically you can trust someone named after a US city. - That's true, yeah. I feel like all of the Eileen movies kind of end up the same way, you know. It was good, I guess. I don't know, I didn't really, it felt like the first one a lot, kind of in like how serious it was, and like, you know, you get one ship. - It takes place in the future. - It takes place in the future. - It takes place in the future. - I like how those two guys were cousins, because like, it's kind of like a, it's kind of vaguely Star Wars-y, where they like find out they're looking at each other. - But they get still kids and stuff. - That's fine, but they still get kids 'cause they're a third cousin, so yeah. That's probably what they're doing on that. - That was my favorite part, honestly. - Yeah, this edit, they probably cut out the kiss for time, you know, just for releasing this. - Mm, release the kiss cut. - Release the kiss cut. - Give us the Fettie Alvarez kiss cut. Hey, also listeners, if you have access to Fettie Alvarez, DMM, release the kiss cut. - Give access to that kiss cut. (laughing) - Tell him, no, don't do it, don't ask him. - So harassing. - Yeah. - What is it? - Cutter and Rugby, cut be? - Oh yeah, cut be? - Cut be? - Ooh. - Us cut rubber shippers, though. - Rugged. - We deserve justice. - Oh yeah. - Rugter. - I don't know, thanks for letting me, you know, just play a fucking whole movie. Like a real legit movie on, you know, hopefully it'll get copyright claim, but-- - Yeah, but like, I'm really happy that we got to-- - It's, yeah. - Give us first before anybody else. That's pretty cool. - Yeah, everyone looks cool. - Oh yeah, oh yeah. - Yeah, well, I mean, listeners, you didn't, if you're listening to this. I mean, you don't know how you-- - You know, it was kind of weird when the movie took like a 30-minute break to have like a gay orgy, but I don't know, I kind of just, I thought, it made sense a little bit, I think. - That's all the movies I watch. - Oh. - Yeah. - A orgy. - I feel like modern day movies have that a lot. - It's right in. Yeah. - Gotta throw it. - The Gorgie. - The Batman versus Superman. Plan of the age. - The Gorgie keeps the audience engaged. It's where like in older films, they'll put an intermission. - You know, when-- - Yeah, basically. - When Fede Alvarez said that it was gonna be like a, it was, there was gonna be a Gorgie. I thought that he just meant like gore, and like there was a lot of gore, not gay orgy, you know. - Not, or is that gay orgy? - Gailion. - Yeah. - Honestly, really brought the quality of the film up for me. - Gailion Dumulus. - Gailion Dumulus. - Gailion Dumulus. That's-- - No. - That's the title of that, that's right there. There's the title, there's the title. - It's the title of the Gailion Dumulus. - See, we had to change the title so we didn't get copyright claim. - True, true, true. - That's all. - That's the real movie. - It's the real movie. - It's the actual review of Alien Romulus. We still have the SEO in our favor for-- - Exactly. - Alien Romulus. - Not gay. - Gailion Dum. - Not Gailion Dumulus. - Once the movie comes out, like on Blu-ray DVD listeners, I want you to do a cut of this podcast, you know, the real audio with the visuals, you know, perfect. - It'll line up perfectly, yeah. - Oh yeah, 'cause it's from the movie. - Yeah. - With all six cast members. - Oh yeah. Well, that was those alien, you know, all the talk games. I did like that they had the Xenomorphs talk this time 'cause you know, it gets kind of-- - Yeah, I haven't done that yet. - Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yeah. - I wasn't expecting those voices, but it really, they make sense. When you really think about it, they make sense. - Yeah, a lot of flip-flopping accents from the Xenomorphs. But, you know, I guess that's aliens for you. - And the humans. - An interesting reason choice, you know? - Yeah, for like, part of it, I can tell the guy or girl and shit. But yeah, we're kind of, you know, speaking of like, you know, keeping in touch. We're talking about that earlier. Where can people find y'all? Find me a giveaway on Instagram, you know? I've got some customs coming up, making some, right now I'm actually making a chappy mini-mate, which funny enough, the director-- - Oh, chippy, chippy, oh, he's me, chippy, oh, chippy, chippy, chippy, chippy. - Oh, chippy, chippy, I am alive. - Which funny, that movie was directed by Neil Blonkamp, you know, he made District 9, he made Elysium. And he was originally gonna make Alien 5, like a reboot of Alien. - Oh, it's like Alien. - But, like, it's like a sequel to 2. Like, the way that Halloween does, like, okay, all the other ones don't count except this one. - Yeah. - There was gonna be one of those for the Alien movies, like, I think 10 years ago, maybe? Or like eight years ago? It fell apart, but, you know, funny little, funny little factoid for ya. Find me a gible thing, that's it. - Nice, nice. - Well, yeah, what you're about to say is exactly where they can find me. Jim leader Nate on everything, you know? If you hit me up with any questions about our fantastic Romulist movie, I should be posting some things, hopefully gonna make some new, just some new Pokemon art again, and posting some more just fun fake-ymon stuff on my Instagram, so, yeah. - Hell, york. - Nice. - Hell, york. - Yeah, that's sick. Yeah, if you wanna follow me, I'm my Instagram @dodola.art, I've been actually posting a lot of art in little comics, been trying to stay consistent and just get that, like, skills up, so. Make sure you follow me there, and make sure you're following No Down Idea on Instagram, and anywhere you can follow podcasts, and YouTube, and such. Yeah. (clapping) - All right, thank you. - All right, let's go, let's go, let's go, Shout out to go. - I wanna thank, Tim. I wanna thank, uh, - Social media, number three. - Rugby, rugby, get over here, get bloody time. - Uh, I wanna thank, uh, what's happening here? - Fearedy, feared word, thanks for dying. (cheering) - Clipto, maniac, rugby, I already introduced you. Who's the other one? Dallas Corgan. - Yeah, thanks. - What, no one knew. - Thanks for the, thanks for Cutter's parents dying. - Yeah. - For leaving, that's what the mystery is. - Woo, uh, Gailion, Gailion Gumbaugh. - Yeah, it's fucking Joss. Shout out to the, Shout out to the, Gailion. - Gailion, Gailion. - Gailion, Shout out to the, Gailion Queen. - We got for the sequel. - The Queen. - The Queen. - The Queen. - Hey, before we go, I would do wanna give, one special thanks, Shout out to Lag9K for the new Aliens theme, which I will be playing it. Uninterrupted, unedited, or any fiddling with. It's God intended. But yeah, so go, you know, give it a listen, and if you like what you hear, you know, go give a, think your local Lag9K. I have also included a post to the theme, some bloopers and outtakes for your entertainment. Enjoy. (dramatic music) (eerie music) (eerie music) (eerie music) (eerie music) (eerie music) (eerie music) (eerie music) (eerie music) (eerie music) (eerie music) (eerie music) (eerie music) (eerie music) (eerie music) (laughing) - Nice. (laughing) - That was good. We'll do a scene with a lean and cutter. Is that cool? - Yeah, that sounds good. So cutter is gonna be like at the table still eating and just like, he's just using his time and he's just cutting giant slices of meat off of like, he's just cutting up all of the food into like dices. He could only eat it if it's like finely chopped. So he's like. - Oh, nice. (eerie music) - Cut real quick. (laughing) (eerie music) - At this point, those escape, they go on the escape pod. - I was thinking before that. - And then essentially like, oh, could it be like a Scooby-Doo? Like they're running in the hallways and then they go into one door and then they go into the other door and then they chase like that and forth like that? - Like in fucking. - Well, that's just a description. - I'm sure. We don't need to act it out. - Yeah, that's how I imagine that happens. 'Cause I was like, how do we podcast that? - Just play the Scooby-Doo song. - Yeah, so yeah. (eerie music) - Oh man. Oh, that was. - So it's cool. - Yeah. - I mean, it's just. - Or is there anything else that I'm trying to leave? - I was just thinking about that a little bit. I thought that one really funny. - Oh, yeah. So it's cool. - We all fucked her. That's the whole port. - Yeah. - So it's cool. - We're all chill. - Juma, we have a schedule. [BLANK_AUDIO]