The Villa of Wellness
Spiritualilty with Allison
I'm your host, Felicia, and the Bill of Wellness podcast will cover the dimensions of wellness such as social, emotional, occupational, environmental, and much more. Episodes will be released weekly on Thursdays with me as your guide, helping you on your journey to better health and wellness, and will provide ideas for you for practices you can use to help you stay motivated, positive, and also some courage when you need it. You can reach me on Instagram and YouTube at the Bill of Wellness and I hope to hear from you and hope you enjoy the show. [Music] You're so funny. Okay. What I am into these things, I have them because I do believe in the energetic thing that it does for me. Speaking of energetic, for my record, Onyx. That's cool. Black Onyx? Yeah. It's like protection too, right? Like good for protection? Yeah. So it's protection or this is obsidian. I've got to double check myself. Obsidian I think. Obsidian because it does absorb like negativity and stuff, but then it also project or like amplifies other things and realities. So it's just like people always like yeah it's going to be protected but also be ready for what it's going to teach you. What did you say energy accepted? I said challenge accepted. Oh my gosh. Yeah. I was going to, it was in August and I was just texting my friend who lives there and she normally comes and visits me for my birthday since like Keanu was born. And I was like I could have wanted this to you. And so I already told my partner that I was going to visit her at some point. So I just made it to be. We're kind of planning it to be for August. Where? Where? In New Orleans? Oh dang. Yeah. So I was like oh my god it's going to be so fun. I always wanted to visit her there. So have you been? Have you? No but also I'm scared. I just told you. Yeah but I'm also just like there's a lot of there's a lot of spiritual energy there. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's you know I think it's how you approach it. Oh yeah for sure. But I told her just bring me to like all the food shops and stuff and that'll be fun. She goes throw there's every one in every corner. I was like okay. We use your friend into that. She's a therapist so she identifies as queer and that's like her her people that she serves to but she also helps just people too. And so she's in Tataro and like you know she's kind of spiritual. Yeah. I mean Tara of Tara. I don't know what that. Anyway. Tara my lady. Yeah. And so I gave her some oracle cards for her birthday. It was this on the 12th. So yeah. And what are your thoughts and her thoughts around that? Because I feel like some people are like oh you can't get it gifted or whatever. Oh I just ordered off Ebay. I just delivered it to her. But they're nice cards. I even bought some myself. So they're about Mary Magdalen oracle cards. Oh interesting. Yeah. I'll show you the cover. Like biblical. Yeah. Yeah. So like it's not. Yeah. I thought. I like the author. And then I have her other oracle cards too. The Divine Feminine. So I like these ones. They make me feel good. So yeah yeah yeah. She really appreciated it because I had spoken to her when I got like the blue and I mentioned Mary Magdalen. And so yeah I like it. I wasn't really into. You have the same. I bought this for myself. I bought it for myself first. And then I ordered one like the next day for her to have it delivered at her place. Okay. Okay. Yeah. I'm sure she'll like bless it. You know like all the stuff. Yes. That's also true. Right. There are ways to also you know cleanse recharge and all the things. And I try to work with them every day. I try to like do some every day so that I have some sort of connection with it. Tell me more because I found the divine cards from another friend I had online because we went to the same like coaching program. And I like the deck. I thought it was pretty slow. I look for it. And then when I got it, it's all about these women who are like six or like leaders from the past. All feminine divine person. So it just kind of gave me some you know like little of like oh yeah because there's other women from the past or figures from the past that did a lot of things. So I mean I don't know much about Mary. I'm trying to get into it and trying to learn about her and like what she did. I know she was like the first woman apostle or something like that. I mean I'm not really into the Bible. I'm just sort of like re like you know finding myself in it. So but it makes me feel good like you know. Yes. And you got that through a coaching seminar. No. Yeah. So my friend of mine that I met. Yeah. So my internet friend who I met online. We went to the same coaching institute and I saw that she had the divine feminine deck which was the second why I showed you. And so I bought myself local cards because I like the messaging and all that. Like I'm not really into tarot cards just yet because you can be intuitive and you interpret it how you want interpret it as far as Oracle cards go. Okay. Yeah. Dex. Those are not tarot deck. Those are not tarot deck. Okay. Oracle. Tarot decks are more like you know the six of swords or the queen of cups. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Which I I started to get into. Oh yeah. Yes. What made you want to get into it? Um you know it's just a long it's just like like when you think about how you get into stuff right and then you start to go down like the different paths of what led you to hear and it's just like I mean the things I also very much believe in like you know history science things like that we have more concrete information around right. But then there's always the part that's that's like well how do we account for and explain what we deem as miracles right. Like things that happen that like on a logistic level should have never happened right or deemed impossible or like when people get diagnosis of stuff right and they're told it's it's you only have like a few months or whatever yet then they go on to survive for like years to come you know. So it's like how do we explain those instances right but it's still stuff that happens in all the different lifetimes right from from however back we can look at the different stories and stuff that people documented like there are also documented cases of miracles you know that even the best minds and the best scientists and the best mathematicians whoever of the time right didn't have answers for you know so there's always that part that I think either people just take for face value of just like oh yeah it's just a miracle and then like you know that's what it is like hallelujah praise whoever you know. Yeah exactly like like I think a lot of people don't look that much further or maybe don't have interest of the time too but CB I'm just like why not study those aspects of life in the same way we treat other things that were taught in school you know and so then I mean I think what eventually got me to hear was because I was like do you know what interests of just like trying to understand people psychology humanity and then that there is always those pieces that I'm just like there's no like direct correlation for some of this stuff so there's got to be something beyond what we can fathom and make sense of because of our own human limitations and so it's just like it would feel weird to disregard all of this other stuff right that we're not seeing and I mean like literally seeing and you know so it was psychology right so I got into all the psychology stuff oh and then got into sociology psychology all of the studies is where it started and this was back when I was like at middle school and high school and just reading the psychology and self-help books that were around and available because also I was like why aren't we just teaching this why is this something that we're just not learning about in class and it's like we have answers to understand each other better but we're not putting any focus on that so that was something that I got into on my own time and in my own interests and then psychology sociology and personality tests right all of them oh my god what the era of like all those online quizzes when we're growing up girl me I know which one are you I always get the I always get the I and J I forget what it's that one is but Myers Briggs yeah I forget which personality that was but it was always yeah always that similar results every time I take it Myers Briggs stuff the Enneagram stuff right the one about the different numbers like all of these profiles of like personalities and then which then also leads you to astrology right because we you'd say about your sign and then it's also like yes but astrology you know it's also tied to you know things in space and things that we also have info about but yet it's still look that as woo-woo because it's like you know and it's fun well I just talking to another friend of mine who is astrologer and she does she's gonna read me in a couple weeks but she read my son's birth chart like a year ago and so I talk to her she'll do mine in a couple weeks like in two weeks whoa okay let me know I mean I had my done before with another person but I'm I kind of want her to do it and then sure sorry what was that I did I'm like we're talking over each other I say people also interpret the information different so even if you were to get it somewhere I feel like if you if you got it done again by other people you'll probably get something different out of it yeah and she was saying like even the deck of cards were derived from tarot cards yes and even if people are skeptics the days of the weeks are named after planets right even the months of the year I think three months of the year I mean there's so many things so it's like and I think she said that they still teach astrologies at a university in the UK I believe I grew up mostly in the US did you live anywhere else now I grew up here well I think that's the other part culturally maybe it's just not as valued in the same place who's who who can go get a master's of that here in the US you know versus like you're saying your friend studied in other countries somewhere and that's totally valid oh no she I think she studied here I'm not sure but she just said there's a university in the in London or UK that's still offers it as a minor or a major I grew up religious but I never liked going to church ever yeah and I had to wear dresses going to church and and just you know so it just wasn't my jam so I stopped eventually but but it's just a practice just to get myself in focus or just kind of warm up my energy it's kind of like that it's kind of like what messages do I need to hear now maybe I can resonate with them maybe it'll give me some sort perspective on something that is going on no I get that and I think that's also why my interest in all of that stuff also peaked more because of also just having like I mean I did the whole religion things because you're raised a certain way and so like you practice and you do all the things that come with that religion and you know I was I was like raised Catholic so you know the whole church thing the communion like all of that stuff and you know Christmas being a big thing Easter right because it's all around the stories and theology of what it means to be a Catholic Christian however you want to categorize it but then you know it was it was just always hard to just be like I don't know I don't know how much of that I should be you know a group yeah some of them would be interpreted and how like priests would talk about you know um the their hominids right and it's just like this is this how are you getting this message out of like this hex kind of thing you know and then the one that started to get used to tell you that some people are better than others and that's the distinction of like the deviating go to heaven and hell and all of this and it's just like shouldn't it be based on you and your merits as a person versus like just your identity so especially when they started talking about it using it for like you know queer people in general and I was like all right that's it this is bullshit it's very judgmental it's very judgmental and growing up in a religious family is very forceful in in a way because you're not you can't ask questions you can't question like you know why do we have to do this why are you saying that there's nothing like that I mean I didn't grow up cat like but it's the same i grew up in glesha there's definitely a lot of those kind of things that I was just like I don't know if I fully agree with all this stuff and also in how they're telling you how to live your life and how to do certain things and all the blah but I was like I still believe in like higher beings or some other forces or like spirituality because I think that's also part of what helps you get through life you've got to find hope and you've got to find some kind of inspiration and motivation somewhere you know because life is it can can be real rough and real bleak at times you know the hardest part is living yes I think when I started to dip into more like do I believe like souls or spirits I think as I sort of were open to it like my idea of death and dying be like I'm not as scared after life stuff also honestly I really do I feel if it would be sad not to I do believe because I think I mentioned it to you too when I was pregnant I dreamt of my grandma three times and I never I didn't even think about her before bed she just showed up in my dreams and I woke up I woke up crying because in the dream I was hugging her because she's shorter than me I was hugging her like this and I woke up crying I was like wow like if that's not a sign then I don't know what it is you know like it she's trying to like she's somewhere trying to like reach me and let me know that that she's letting me know that she knows that I'm pregnant and she knows that I'm having a kid is she not speaking your dream like you didn't talk I don't remember talking I just knew it was her because it looked exactly like her and I she was like my maternal figure between those ages like 7 to 12 or 5 to 12 what's that were you current you in your dream or were you younger you I was currently because I was tall yeah it was crazy because I was hovering over her like this right and she was wearing her little glasses and like shed her colored hair you know old people still colored their hair so I knew I just knew it was her I don't know it was crazy right it's just like well how do you account for things like that right like how do you make sense of that and there is studies I know there are because I've read a few but it's also just like the specificity of what happens you know it's like you recognize like this person like you wake up to this feeling you know of like being hugged like you were sleeping it's not like there was actually that you know but even if that's the case and that tells you that even the mind works in like really wild ways you know and even on that front it was very specific that it was like your grandma who meant a lot to you right and then showed up in your dream because also the ways that our minds work in the dream state it pulled people and characters in our dreams based off of faces we have registered or know or have seen so it's like if you think about how many people and faces you've seen in your lifetime so far right like what wasn't about your mind that chose your grandma my subconscious you know like yeah right like I didn't even know I was going to dream about her and I didn't even dream about her before and then I didn't dream about her even after so like when I was pregnant there's something I think for me like because my senses were so heightened and my emotional state was kind of heightened because you were pregnant because I was pregnant and also I was going through familial issues as well I wasn't like thinking about my grandma you know what I mean so she's just kind of appeared three times yeah three times we're three different dreams no three different times while I was pregnant I told my husband I was like I dreamt about her again with the heck like is she trying to like tell me something like she was here with me I woke up crying I you know I think she's just telling me that she's with me she knows I'm pregnant you know because I don't have a mother I couldn't even tell you if it was every trimester but I think it could have been it could have been right because when you're saying three times and I'm just like the pregnancies is trimesis like gosh you know three I know and it's funny because you have so many kids and so many grandkids so I have so many first cousins like at like 30 or something you know so I'm just like yeah I mean she really understood me as a child like because I didn't have a parent so yeah I don't know that was just kind of wild yeah I mean so thinking about that and then thinking about like the afterlife it kind of makes me less scared about it because I still see myself as an old lady though like I picture myself like really gray hair really old so I kind of imagine myself being that I don't see myself going anytime soon I imagine that I have a long life yes yes yeah I mean there's so much to go off of it just also like your mental state is like whatever we imagine whatever like dream or whatever we think we also have to protect our brains and our minds so that's why I I think that's why I started reading oracle cards for myself just because I want like the positive and love messaging I think I need that coming from somewhere I mean I get it you know like physical but I need to nourish myself in that way as well you know I mean the even distinguishing between like physical love that also varies from person to person and also which is interesting like as people get older they say that that kind is you know they seek something beyond that you know beyond physical and so it's just like okay interesting like well it happens in like the later developments or do we just like as people seek something more than the more primal and more immediate things and what is that thing the the needs right like the food shelter like all like all of that like is it just because we are moving further up it hopefully in life as you progress so maybe it's that part you know but but then it's also just like you think about people who no matter how old they get it's still kind of just like oh no if age is majority also personality right we I think a personality is kind of being permanent but I think if someone really wanted to expand or whatever you want to call like neuroplasticity you know building your pathways like doing things differently understanding things I think that's why I'm so interested in people that are different from me like because I get so much out of it I think it's an openness and an interest in them right because there's I think a lot of people and also there's a bunch of studies and aging right and and ah that was the thing I got to find these charts that I was talking about last time but like the whole thing of like how many people you know you see on a regular basis and how much time to spend with them right as you get older it just goes down right and then the same thing like if you have kids like the time with your kids and that you spend with your families all just starts to go down as you get older you know and so there's also just that part but I think I mean yes I think or I like to think that that is harder a bit is natural right because people will also age as you age and of course people will pass but then it's that thing of just like why do people feel that you can't meet others or expand or continue to expand as you age also you know like people are always like high school the best days of your life or college are the best day and I'm just like what is that when you're holding on too for like the rest of your life and that was just like the best days that you've had and I'm just like well and the things most people keep you know their their contacts and their connections and their friends from those time frames you know and just try to carry them as far out into or maybe have an expectation of that's what it's going to be and I mean great if it works for y'all you know but I don't think that's everybody's case you know something it's not mine at all right and so like when people talk about that or they go it's harder to make friends as an adult and stuff like that I mean yes it it well it depends on how you look at it I'm just more picky and I and I what it's hard in a sense because people are like well I don't know I can only speak for myself but yeah I mean we're only speaking for ourselves right like I'm not trying to speak for everybody else yeah I mean it depends on what you you attract who you are right so as far as like friends go and maybe partners go I don't know but if you're going to be a grumpy person then you're not going to meet much people if you're grumpy and like you criticize and you're so judgmental if no one's going to stick around you I was going to ask you about when you talking about you attract who you are right it's true do I think it's true do you think it's true all the time as far as like if you want close friends or deep maybe deep or relationships or close relationships I think so it also depends where your state of mind is because I have friends from 10 years ago so but we don't live in the same state but some of them I still keep regular contact but I do think as far as personality and what you both want out of the friendship I think you do attract who you are in a sense if you are a pathetic person and open-minded you're eventually going to meet someone like that and you're going to know it intuitively it's the energetic thing you know you're going to know so I mean yeah the pool is maybe a little bit smaller as you get older but there's still people out there looking for friends I mean there's Facebook groups in your local communities like mom groups for example different moms meet up with each other people in the same career field can meet up with each other I mean then you'll find maybe one person you can connect with so I just think it's just like what effort are you making to make friend or even one friend it's uncomfortable for sure but I think it's important to be in social settings and you know even just finding one friend out of a huge group I do think maybe not all the time because we have co-workers and family members and stuff like that but I think if you're intentional of like hey I want to meet more like-minded people or at least I want to connect I'm going to reach out to people who I know already and maybe they want to do this project with me you'll have coffee or maybe my esthetician is pretty cool and she wants to have lunch because she's a mom too as an example yeah I do believe that I mean there's part of me that yes I think that is a piece of it you know in terms of like you know the state that you're in will attract you know whatever and all the stuff about like manifesting and that stuff and I'm just like I don't know but sometimes you know you just get stuff that you do you do not ask for yeah of course or maybe you didn't dissipate whether you consciously ask for it or not right that's where it gets tricky because that whole thing of like you the saying you can't always get what you want but you get what you need right and so like there's a lot of times when I'm just just like okay give me the patience right grant me the patience to to deal with whatever and then of course it comes in the form of like more people who just push my buttons and I can either choose to tap into patience or or lose my shit you know so it's just like yeah also think be careful what you wish for because you don't know a form is going to come in do you believe in destiny or fate do you believe in purpose also like that in life purpose yeah I do I mean I feel like we make our own destiny if we are intentional and we are aware of like whatever's around us or opportunities or whatever you want to call it most of the time it can't appear on itself sometimes there's has to be effort to be made but I don't know I think it just depends on the person like for me I do yeah I mean I what is your purpose and what is your destiny that's a good question my purpose I think I'm supposed to be a creative person that's like something with communication or connecting or something like that it may not be written in stone exactly but I feel like it's getting more of what I'm doing because before I used to feel really stressed out I used to feel there was a pool that I couldn't really understand or the negative thing about something that I'm doing but yeah so like what I'm doing now I feel like it feels good like I you know this project or being a mom was one of those other things I feel like we have many purposes because I was thinking like yeah I'm empathetic but what am I supposed to do with that you know like am I supposed to be like understanding yeah I can be understanding I don't see myself as like a therapist or a counselor you know because I think that's too much for me to handle like energetically even though I find myself to be very understanding and empathetic I don't think I could do it as work day in and day out but so yeah I'm getting closer so what my thing was that I'm getting closer to get rid of all the negative energy that was blocking me that could be people you know that could be a way of thinking that could just be my own perception of things so I had to like rearrange certain things in order for me to get clear on certain things it's a whole thing it's a whole and manifesting I mean it's a fun word to throw around nowadays but yeah I mean I mean you got to try you know because if you don't try how do you know what's gonna work and what's not gonna work how you have to figure this stuff out and like I learned just recently like what is it just because you don't succeed is not failure you just have to try something that's you got to pick a direction see if it works and it doesn't work you got to pivot so it's not really failure it's just failures part of success so that's how I kind of see it I don't I don't know if I'm answering your question it's a long it's a loaded question for sure so for sure it is definitely a loaded question which is why well purpose is just kind of like I feel like it kind of changes like I mean like your personality can have so many purposes like and you but you have to choose what's more I'm gonna throw this fun word around aligned with you you know like what connects with you what do you feel pulled to do do you want to be creative do you want to write do you want to talk like this you know do you want to you know do corporate in that way like it's just kind of I feel like I feel like we have sub personalities like overall and then so I don't know I don't know if that's even a word but we can make it a concept yeah trademark we can I coined it I coined the word trademark that right now so personalities of you I'm very personalities you know like because we're always changing we're always evolving so it's like we're not stagnant beings you know human beings change over time and our careers can change our interests can change you know so no I agree that's the point that that's the whole point and I think that's what gets what people get fixated on is like and how it's also discussed you know in society in media in all these other places right there there's it's always feels very definitive of like it's your destiny this is like your fate this is like your purpose and it's functioning under the assumption that there's only one you know yeah and that's very frightening and you have to you know also sometimes you got to find that one right and then it's just like but I think whenever we the different stories and stuff that we get here we go again right the different stories and the things that we get are all like I think we're only seeing part of it you know part of those things and then the the stuff that people share are also only parts of their life story you know and so you could be getting just a time in place of like you know like I think people average at 80 years right like you're only getting a section of that and that's what people implement or like they focus on and it's just like and then if they feel like they lost their purpose I don't think I believe that as I've gotten older I just believe that it changes right and you have multiple and you know part of it is also you you you rediscover again right and that changes and I think that's what's hard because it all is based on change which we as humans are just not that great at you know yeah adaptability or like some people really like hold on to their jobs or like the title or whatever they even the tasks you know like like I learned this and you know they hold that I mean that's great but I was never like that but I don't know I've had so many things I do but I need to a Trevor Noah episode I'll have to look it up but I don't know what's from the cast but that was one of the things he was talking about and I was like me men what did he say what was that they're talking about like when people ask you about who you are as a person you know most of the US will talk about what they do for work as their job because they're so closely identifying with the thing you do for work but if you were to ask someone from somewhere else not in the US they will say things like I'm a creative and like connecting with nature or you know like if you ask them who they are they'll talk about these other things that are almost secondary to US because it's just like well I work in tech and I do build you know what I mean it's like yeah in our nature I think it's a cultural thing first right and that's where most of us identify with and so even that it's just like when people I mean I'm pretty sure I did it to when I was younger but as I grew older and people like oh like what do you do and I'm like in what sense like I also just asked that so now too right like are you like talking about my work or are you talking about what I do in life like what do you like what and even asking that also confused people because they're just probably waiting for me to say like yeah I work in IT and I blah blah blah blah blah you know but to be fair sometimes I will just say that depending on the person because yeah wait I'm gonna just tell you the just tell them to just like oh yeah yeah oh yeah yeah I mean we didn't even talk about intuition it's okay we can do it so just briefly before we wrap up like yeah I mean the past two years I I've really listened to how I react because I mean the feel the sensations I get because that's just how I am so I really have to listen to my intuition I really have to make sure I feel okay with everything like my body has to feel regulated before I didn't do that when I was younger like I just did whatever I was told to do and just do this finish that and whatever and it never doesn't really end up right but but yeah I mean you can continue this personality conversation and purpose this wheel both huh I just I went our home to the tension well because something about like your your good thing is like the wellness what is it the wellness part just the villa of wellness because when I came up with the what when I came up with the title I pictured a place okay I pictured a place the villa of wellness I have I changed it it was the melody truth or but that's in it really I was like I don't know who knows drymate changed again later on who knows the melody truth sounds like a sex podcast and so it didn't really sound wellness daddy I wanted the word wellness in there because it's a sexual wellness is also fair well it's part of wellness right it's part of our life like it's a practice it's a ritual it's like okay how do we maintain it's about maintaining sustenance right like our minds our bodies how we think how we love people how we you know develop relationships how we go deep into our friendships like those are like practices that are not really like talked about we only talk about like skincare which I I do go over but it's it's a lot more than that I feel like so got it you know you know I was asking about like the wellness wheel yeah the wellness wheel so do you already do that I mean I covered some but I mean we can go over because every everybody has a different spin on each one so it is and that's why I was like maybe that's maybe that's the structure we put yeah that was my whole thing when I would try to redesign the podcast I was kind of like okay I want this to be a guide for people but I also want to have discussion because I just can't just talk about can't just talk to myself I'm your host Felicia and the ville of wellness podcast will cover the dimensions of wellness such as social, emotional, occupational, environmental and much more episodes will be released weekly on Thursdays with me as your guide helping you on your journey to better health and wellness and will provide ideas for you for practices you can use to help you stay motivated positive and also some courage when you need it you can reach me on instagram and youtube at the villa of wellness and I hope to hear from you and hope you enjoy the show you