DumTeeDum - A show about BBC Radio's 'The Archers'

DTD - 110 - Yokel bear in control again

On this week’s episode we have calls from Michelle who wants to talk about the candy in the classroom New York Nigel who wants to talk about soil erosion Witherspoon who has a message from Handsome Husbandand Miss Mid City who says hurrah for Peggy!

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Duration:: 1h 15m
Broadcast on:: 17 May 2016
Audio Format:: other

My dad works in B2B marketing. He came by my school for career day and said he was a big row as man. Then he told everyone how much he loved calculating his return on ad spend. My friends still laughing at me to this day. Not everyone gets B2B. But with LinkedIn, you'll be able to reach people who do. Get a $100 credit on your next ad campaign. Go to linkedin.com/results to claim your credit. That's linkedin.com/results. Terms and conditions apply. Linked in, the place to be. To be. It took a lifetime to find the person you want to marry. Finding the perfect engagement ring is a lot easier. At bluenile.com, you can find or design the ring you've always dreamed of. With help from Blue Niles jewelry experts who are on hand 24/7 to answer questions. And the ease and convenience of shopping online. For a limited time, get $50 off your purchase of $500 or more with code listen at bluenile.com. That's $50 off with code listen at bluenile.com. This podcast is a Royfield Brown production. Find others on iTunes. Hi, I'm Sarah Smith. If you're the type of person that goes to Liberty as other people would go on safari and the fact that John Lewis doesn't have a funeral service makes you fret. Sarah Smith cleaning plugs are for you. Sarah Smith, available from Sainsbury's for the posher washer. Proud sponsors of Dumtee Dum. It's May the 2nd and we are in New York and whenever Dumtee Dummers get together throughout the world, what they do New York Nigel. They sing a song, a Dumtee Dum to be precise. Are you sure? I think so. Could you second that Beth? I second that. Do you want to third that? I do. Very bad. Who are you? Morgan. Morgan. And where exactly are we, Mr. With a Spoon? We are in front of the Norwood Club in New York City. So, after three. One, two, three. Oh, for the past five years, Slipping World in Sudbury have taken part in Race for Life in memory of a much loved member sadly lost to cancer far too young and have raised many thousands of pounds for this cause close to our hearts. Our team, Angel D Lights, will be taking part again this year and would welcome your support. Just Giving Page is justgiving.com/AngelD-L-I-T-E-S or contact @DuskySubstances on Twitter. Thank you. This is Dumtee Dum, the show about the reality docudrama that is centred on Ambridge in the Half of the Midlands. I'm the organic carrot that is yoke or bear and with me I have the mildewed veg box that is Lucy Freeman. And the last part of the Claps of Bridge Farm Enterprises is you. Today's Dumtee Dum is well from whoever Royfield decides it should be because he's over in America land hence me being here. But in the meantime Lucy, can you remind our listeners how they can win the accolade of Dumtee Dummer of the week? Yes, if you would like to sing us a Dumtee Dum, give us a plot prediction or develop a violent allergic reaction to your own shepherd's hut. Then ring us on 02031-3105 or leave a message on Speakpipe. Thanks to lovely champerages for her amazing voices to Cosmo for his podcast roundups and to Sarah Smith for sponsoring us. Thank you all such a Derek for the loan of the back bedroom. It's a bit tidier in here as Derek's having a sort out for the village jumble trail. He's decided to donate his selection of specialist Angela Ripon fan fiction and his trust. That's one trail I don't want to go on. For only enough my mum is an artist, an artist's listener, that has very high standards in life. Or an artist's listeners do. Well yes but more so than normal and she turned around to talk about the artist like we do. Normally we see each other once a week and we're just like oh what's happening on the artist and she said that jumble trail. So what about it? She said it's just going to be a load of old taps that should go down the dump. She doesn't believe in upcycling. You know what I mean? It's just you know why upcycling when you combine you. Your mother has ruined my monologue. That is the first two sentences of my monologue. Really? Oh god no. Royfield cut that out. No no no it's fine. Leave it in. It shows she's a woman of good taste. Absolutely. So on this week's episode we have calls from Michelle who wants to talk about the candy in the classroom. New York Nigel who wants to talk about soil erosion and can I say just personally what finer topic is that? You know with a spoon who has a message from Houndsome Husband and Miss Mint City who says hurrah for Peggy. But first let's hear about Lucy's Week in Ambridge. Erm what did we learn this week on Ambridge? That there is a fine line between tap and vintage. Fallon and Emma went off to a vintage fair and nearly bought a lamp but said they couldn't as it had to be pat tested. That means they take it over to Bridge Farm. Pat looks at it and says the lamp's not completely broken but it's certainly been behaving oddly for quite a while now officer but I don't think it would actually hurt anyone. They have now inevitably decided to have a festival of tat in Ambridge. Oh good furniture on the radio. What could be better? Uh Jazza is attempting to fill the void cause by no longer having to spend his mornings rogering the board housewives of Ambridge and has become the world's most unlikely bird watcher. Most birds he's seen are covered in batter and while Jimus is worrying about the difference between finches Jazza's still wondering what part of a chicken its nuggets come from. Josh and Pip seem to be best friends now oddly but then so much is odd what's one more thing. I sent something coming Pip being rejected by Matthew in a dumping bigger than the Bridge Farm readbed after one of Pat's lentil alo bajean bakes. Wayne Foley has been replaced as media person who keeps turning up in Ambridge with Eevee Thorne Davis with the eyebrows. She interviewed the fair buttocks about their up the arse eggs and both of them sat on Josh to prevent him getting a word in edgeways. Josh discussed it with Hootie Jill who said vaguely "will it make a change from juggling cats?" which makes me think she's heading straight into the laurels and can sit next to Alistair while he sits in the corner shouting "Whose paintings?" Brian had a good laugh at Sabrina Thrate having no sense of shame. Ha! She's probably got less to be ashamed of than you have Brian and Jennifer said she couldn't imagine what it must be like to be Pat. Well to be honest Jenny darling if I was going to put money on someone being the mother of a jail bird it would be you as Kate's got tax-dodging fraudster written all over like a henna tattoo. Uh Piggy actually was quite helpful and supportive for once which was the biggest surprise of the week. She went marching off to the prison to see Helen quite enjoyed the all over body search and as a result we'll be going back again next week. When she got home she got her etch a sketch out again wiped it clear and rewrote her will for the 43rd time. It now says "Helen is very brave and gets everything unless she stops listening to me in which case lock her up and throw away the key and that nice rob can have it all I've always liked him such a nice young man." Uh Latif who sounds very handsome and was played by Omar Sharif had a very fun day out at home farm talking about scenes. Everyone said his name over and over again to make sure remember who he was. You would like to speak to Adam Latif certainly. Adam Latif wants to speak to you Latif does come here and speak to Latif who's over there looking handsome. Kenton and New Wayne are getting on better so now Kenton just has to put his willy away. Instead of telling him to just get over himself, Jolene is of course doing some weird psychological manipulation to get exactly the same result but with a lot of Cadbury's caramel koi chuckling. Ruth and David had a wander up and down Lakey Hill waiting for Hootie Jill's Madeira cake to cool down. They do bugger all those two, I mean nowadays even the cows milk each other. Ed the Butch Shearer and Tractor Man has suddenly found the time to start making elf houses for no apparent reason whatsoever. What with eddy moving into shepherd's huts and burnt building caravans for chickens and bridges slowly turning into a sort of agricultural shanty town. Homes for all! As long as you're not a Grundy you don't actually need somewhere proper to live, perform ferret manicures and hose down your crusty long johns. And in other news Tom went to go and cheer Morrissey up and heaven knows he's miserable now. The end! Bravo! Bravo that was great this week. That was oh yes there's lots to talk about there as well. I'm going to break with tradition because you mentioned about Latif and I'm going to mention a tweet now and I'm really hoping you haven't been to is one of your tweets in the morning. But it was from @jazzaarchers which is Jazza McCreary on twitter. Said it's almost summer that must be good. I had got it as one of my tweets that you see I said you and I have separated at birth. Oh there you go. No hurry on anyway I like it. Right that must mean it's almost time for Adam to have an affair. Picker, dairy manager or posh businessman. Now isn't this the truth? Every summer. Every summer. Yeah it's like it's like suns out bums out for Adam isn't it? It's just like... Well I mean I think we should get to the point where actually we don't need British summer time anymore. We need British Adam time. Yeah exactly. You know it's so regular. We just put our clocks forward the first time that Adam's putting it somewhere that you should be in the clunk of Adam's belt hitting the floor. Yeah yeah so but that was that was great. That's it. Keep talking about his wife and his children didn't he? I think so yeah. That might be pushing it slightly slightly. I know I know you know two tries for a conversion and all that but I'm not sure that they'd actually go that far. Well I don't know see because Adam seems to have... Adam seems to have this way with men doesn't he? But I mean I don't know why. I think you know God could he bottle it or something? I mean it's just like... I said oh wow it's just yeah. Sorry? You're a big Ian fan aren't you? Oh no no I'm not a bit I'm not an Ian fan. That's always been a bone contention with me and some other people. Oh that's right yeah. Is that I've never been really too enamored with Ian and I don't really know why you're just never really kind of jailed with him as a character? Can I ask you as a as a as a as a gentleman of the gay persuasion? Does your gay dog go off when you hear Adam? I mean do you think that yes that he you know you sort of I don't know you kind of think yes he's he's talking to his partner. Does that seem realistic? Well yes I know. I think because they've been together so long and God knows why because you know all the unfaithfulness and what have you and talking to which that's a plot line that's never been resolved doesn't it? They got married just before Ian found out that he's actually had two affairs. They got married there was me already for kind of God what's he we're seeing gonna do? I mean let's face it this you know Ian's handy with the knives you know what I mean? So I kind of do because they've been together so long so whether that's kind of fairly realistic in the you know but in terms of Adam no not really but I don't know why. Okay. I don't know I don't know it's it's quite book really isn't it Adam? I mean I guess it's a firm isn't it? What happened to Sean from the cat and fiddle? You know I can't remember so this is the thing. You remember because Sid said you used to hate him didn't he because because he was gay he used to be because Sid was a right and he always used to have a go at them and that was sort of adding sort of element to the rivalry between the bull and the cat and fiddle but I don't even know what's happened to the cat and fiddle let alone Sean. Do you know what? I really don't know. Cosmo. Yeah Cosmo. This is a job for Cosmo I mean but if this was a TV soap then they would have moved to Birmingham basically because that's what happens in all TV soap isn't it? Someone disappears I didn't move to Birmingham mind you I'm saying that but Vickia might move to Birmingham so yeah so yeah I don't know I'm still I don't know Adam and Ian just they've never really got we're probably going to get calls about this aren't we for me they've never really kind of seen together and the times that they're kind of you know they're together doing domestic things which is less and less these days they don't actually really all seems a bit odd couple rather than couple to me yeah yes but I don't know maybe it's just me. Who was the guy that did the milk king who went to do you remember they did the Ambridge Extra and there was a guy there was a guy that used to do the milk round and then they had an Ambridge Extra and they went off and and basically they bumped into this bloke who turned out to be his boyfriend because he used to be in a relationship with the man and he never came back and then Mike. Oh Harry, Fallon. God how am I going to get them? Was it Harry? Because Fallon went off with him didn't she? Yeah no yes and all I'm projected for that actually came across as quite quite realistic to be honest with you so oh I don't know it's a bit old I don't know so the I think I was going to say that was um that this week in Ambridge one that really made me think as well was Ursula went to church. I know I thought that I thought how somehow that didn't seem to match up with her at all to me. Exactly I think it's just like what church is she going to church of Satan? It's like she walks in and you know all the crucifixes catch fire or something. It's just like she never mentioned that before. I don't think she'd ever taken because he said don't you want to go to church with with with with granny Ursula didn't he? But I don't think she'd ever taken Henry to church before and I don't remember her going before all this happened. You don't reckon she you don't reckon she's doing a bit of a she's doing a bit of a um kind of publicity thing you know. Oh yes yes yes yeah by being part of the community. But I think she's so I think she's so uh dismissive of the locals and so I don't think she'd care what they thought of her really. She just thinks that the the the the ticheners are right and everyone else is wrong. She's she's you know she I don't think she cares at all. She doesn't like Kirsty she obviously hates Pat. She you know she's just not interested in anybody. She was vaguely nice to Peggy but I don't think she'd be interested in impressing anyone because I don't think she cares that much. No I think that I mean she she is a comedy character though just on the basis she's one step away from turning her up in a coke made of Dalmatians isn't she? Oh absolutely she is the crele of the ville of things. But then there's a strange other dimension of of her you know is she herself an abused wife because of the way how horrible because of how horrible Bruce is. So I'm not sure what we're supposed to infer from that that that that abused women go on to then produce abused children which which is you know obviously well documented but but do they themselves become abusers in in in terms of their sort of the way they are with other people. You know lacking in empathy and and and superiority and everything else. I don't know it's just a I don't know if if they're just trying to give her a personality or whether she's supposed to be acting according to a certain type I don't know. I'd to be honest I don't know either. I mean so it's some fascinating stuff going around. I mean I'd like the theory that's going around but Miles the other son is somehow going to play a part in this but not for the family because it is really odd that he's not there. It's really a sticker like something. Yeah and when they talked about him he said Asula said he is still your brother as if there's something gravely wrong with him but he is still your brother which makes me think he is something that they you know disapprove of so he's either gay or he's he's you know different to them in some in some respect he's not sort of following the family you know this this this this ridiculous front that they they put up as you know this this perfect upright family. So he's obviously letting the side down as they would see it in some in some way but we just don't know how yet well God knows we could do with some kind of countering to the rescue couldn't we bloody hell yes why I don't understand well this will all come up in the calls anyway but I just don't understand why Helen isn't telling anybody anything. Do we see whether any call runners have cancer to our rescue? Hello ambridge 3962. The first call is Michelle Laffert. Okay. The candy in the classroom. Hi Lucy in Rowfield it's Michelle from Rhode Island calling. I just wanted to say I really appreciate you guys being back this week. I don't know what entailed a lot of sacrifice with Lucy having to listen to two whole weeks of the archers at once and Rowfield's international travel but I really missed the podcast last week and I wanted to talk about the little story Helen told about the candy in the classroom which I'm sure everyone's going to call in about but I think I sort of understand what they're trying to do there. You know people that have inappropriate guilt and tend to internalize blame are kind of targeted by predators like Rob and it shows Helen as being a particularly sensitive emotional person which is fine and a lot of people who aren't sensitive and emotional also get involved in these abusive relationships so I just wonder what they're trying to say about Helen as a character there if she's just you know she obviously think she's broken Rob thinks she's broken the audience thinks she's broken but finding the way she's not broken is what's going to help her get out of this so I hope that happens anyway thanks for the podcast always bye. What was all that about? Well I think it comes down to the same thing again it's about the internalizing thing again isn't it which is that I think Helen's looking over it's almost kind of like this trauma has happened and she's kind of looking back and making connections with things in her life thinking well this is I do you think she's actually sat in the cell thinking I did this therefore I am a bad person yes and look you go all the way back to school and I was a bad person then but she says she doesn't say she's bad she says she's weak and that people can spot weakness in her that Greg chose her because she was weak that Rob chose her because she was weak so she's identifying that somehow these things are happening to her she she's thinking that these things are happening to her because of something which is true to an extent in that horrible men will pick women that they see lacking in in in in confidence or self-belief but she is thinking that that in itself is a fault of hers that she's somehow giving off these awful vibes which is attracting these blokes. Yeah I think I think what I was saying comes back to what you've discussed before about perfection yeah and I think what's you know and it's I'm really kind of I'm really aware that I can sit here and say well this is maybe what she's doing and what have you but it's a man I can I can never really kind of understand the situation that that has you know put her there yeah because but I think there's one thing that that really kind of rang true is when you talk about perfectionism and then when it came to the attack on Rob was that I think maybe she sat there thinking this is proof that I cannot be perfect and therefore I'm weak and therefore not you know because she's in a maybe in her head and we know this is not what's really going on but maybe in her head she's thinking I've sabotaged what could have been a perfect marriage yeah because she's blaming herself whereas actually Rob's been sabotaging that from day one yeah well he's in only intention in getting involved with her I think was to yeah to see something that he saw as sort of flawed perfection and just crack it open and that's what he did yeah I think for Helen I think for people who are like Helen that kind of level of particularly women that level of perfectionism and that level of anxiety over having to do everything to be seen to be doing the right things to give off the right image all the time there is there is no good enough there is perfect and then there is wrong and weak and you know yeah a waste of time and and so and when you get to that stage it's an exhausting way to live because nobody can live like that so then you do find you do find yourself in extreme situations because your your hunt for perfectionism and the lengths you will go to put yourself put you in that in that position where where you're facing the extremes of the situation rather than just a middle ground where you think okay today was a really crappy day and I didn't do well but you know tomorrow I'll try harder and I'll try to do that again one day at a time that kind of thing but and that that mentality also as far as I know seems to go along with eating disorders as well that kind of yeah if I eat anything I'm dreadful the only way to be good is to just not eat full stop yeah yeah I think there's I think there's a lot of truth in that that's certainly kind of it makes sense but I mean I don't know I think we just have to kind of see this out now don't we and just see we haven't got a lot of choice have we really oh and I mean kind of I went throughout phase where I wasn't really listened to it but I felt so you know I did start listening to it again but it's difficult it's difficult because it kind of overshadows everything doesn't it yep absolutely you know uh which takes us on to with a spoon actually hey baby I hear the blues are calling toss salads and scrambled eggs massive greetings lucy royfield millie bell and all dumpty-dummers around the world it's witherspoon and angus haggis here with a special message from handsome husband he says he wants to stop listening to the archers at least for a while because he finds the whole thing too depressing well though there is a little bit of evidence that the listing ocean liner that dare not be named is very very slowly turning away from the iceberg named I don't give a crap anymore as I had noted in the first couple of weeks after the pie incident and as lucy and others so eloquently talked about last week the story has just overwhelmed the enjoyment of everything else as much as we'd like to engage in the other storylines as a respite against all things Helen and Rob related they all seem like rather small potatoes though I'll say briefly Josh as kind as he is to his granny is otherwise becoming more and more of a jerk will anyone put him in his place and does anyone have less personal insight than jazzor are the script writers planning to have him fall into the deepest of abysses rather than apologize well back to law and order ambridge the level of associated malaise is palpable and has caused the listeners to be infected by it as well why haven't more of Helen's family and friends rally to her cause why haven't they stopped and asked why would Helen have done such a thing why wouldn't anyone have raised the question of possible abuse and as we've all wondered where are the missing kirsty Ian and Jess why is a 91 year old woman the only one who tries to light a fire under Helen when Helen mentions mentions to miss Anna Tragorn that she won't let Rob have the children why doesn't she pursue this and when Anna has to briefly play psychoanalysis with Helen why does she not request that a forensic psychiatrist or psychologist be called for a consultation will that brief insight into obsessive self-critical personality that has certainly been brought to a boil by Rob be further examined or will it be left at the side of the road as so many other plot strands have been wait Angus has something to tell me he says stop mixing my metaphors and to stop asking so many questions without answers well then dumpty dummers talk among yourselves and we'll check in again next week handsome husband is depressed um yes and absolutely why aren't more i know i know it's up to Helen which of her family and friends visit her she has to sign the thing doesn't she just say that she wants those people to visit her but hey why why aren't more people visiting pat and tony and saying how are you how is Helen what's that people only seem to ask if they sort of bump into them in the shopping things well they're asking other people she's just like it's like everyone circling round aren't they yeah i mean i don't know whether that's a particularly British thing where you sort of you don't want to you know let's just don't upset them it's like when you're bereaved and somebody crosses the road rather than talk to you because they don't and it's not because they're being horrible it's just because they have no idea what to say so they'd rather just you know run away so whether it's it's it's an element of that that they that they kind of just want to to just leave them to it because they find the whole thing too awkward they don't know what to say yeah but you know well again Kathy where the hell is Kathy? Kathy pat's best friend who's spontaneously combusted apparently is the point is it probably moved to Birmingham? it's no but you know it's been right and i think you know i think i think there's something in here which is that you know when someone's partner who's obviously been listening along is now saying do you know what that's enough that's too much then i think you know i think it's tipping over an age somewhere and i just yeah i mean i've paid my views on this a well known and you know so but i think another thing is with this being law and order average my immediate thought was law and oh no not order it's just home no um every time it comes on but there's another thing that with it's been said that i thought it was quite interesting which was the missing so many people missing yeah there was a bit this week where um where um Linda went round to see because of the strength round she wasn't there yeah i said oh no no i was just oh well no no and seen or i was thinking you're right no one's seen her and i was wondering whether Jennifer would go do you know we haven't seen her for about nine months i don't know where she is you know we should be ringing the police by now well let me think i think the thing is and i've made a connection something else which is the do you remember when the cat went missing yes has Kate taken the cattle is that why you're saying no the cat will go missing first yeah and now people are going missing kind of a bloody triangle isn't it well i tell you what we don't need hand projects for we need hand projects files something weird's going on maybe there's some sort of cosmic force around penny has it that's you know dragging things down they'll have to do a search with with radar planes and things like that they've had to focus on triangle but it's lovely oh christin them up christin alleys Carter they'll be there yeah so it's just like we should get moulder and sculling can you imagine the the arches with an am an ambridge x-files crossover can you imagine moulder and sculling i'm gonna see in the bull i'm i'm gonna see if harryak can do an impression of um of sculli and then i think we should do a recording of of the ambridge x-files i think so can you imagine them interviewing joe it's just like but again there's also as well witherspoon was saying as well it's very badly done now i i mean i mean i want the procedural stuff like why isn't amateur rockin bringing along a psychiatrist yeah now i've watched every episode of silk at least three times which as far as i know makes me legally qualified it makes you certifiable but anyway carry on yeah i loved silk vaccine pink i love maxing pink um but yeah basically it's you're right it's just that's not how things work or at least not my understanding of it it's like you know certainly a barrister wouldn't be turning around and saying oh well you know i'll give up a few weeks for you and just sit in the cell and wait for a second you really i'll just sit here and wait until you decide you want to talk rather than telling you right you've got half an hour go yeah exactly who is paying for all this anyway oh you just and also as well why isn't amateur gorgeous going go on helen clock sticking yes money's clocking up unless you tell me you are going to prison for a very real long time not all this as far as all the sinister design though they're not massively touchy feely i have to say they're not all that patient really no no it's just she seems quite you know well it never is pegged for it i mean it's they've probably got the equivalent of the national debt of brazil by now haven't they because i mean it she's already spent about 85 billion pounds just waiting for helen to you know say something other than no comment that was the first fortnight you imagine it when the legal bills get so much it's just like helen finally gets released you know and and they go which is i'm so glad to be home it's just like yeah they come and to repcess it just like i mean let's face it the housing is a housing is an issue i mean we've seen with the grandis yes yes do i i've got i've got an idea and again it's another science fiction thing you know you the elven house oh my god yes do you remember that film fantastic voyage yeah they could live without going live in a little elf house that was a very odd thing wasn't it those elf houses i think they're going to open the door and find sandy toxvig and susan calman living in them i just i just i i i preferred it when this plot line was about uh ten of a potentially being on the magic mushrooms to be honest with you i'll tell you what there's a plot if if you want to take an issue up script writers older grandis on mushrooms well do you remember that time when kate uh kate spiked um jennifer and brian's uh venison stew when she was going around with what was he called mud or spud or something like that what was he called he had a real it was because everybody was getting all excited about bypasses weren't they and we had the first ever crusty and everybody went nuts about him oh yeah i think it was i think it was but was git or plonker or something i can't remember his name but anyway yes she was with him and uh and she put loads of um loads of grass in there in the in the curry and and jet not curry in there in the stew and jennifer just got very chatty and a bit giggly didn't she yes but i tell you what that's something that needs kind of a brian on a regular basis oh brian had love it my god he needs a bit of them r&r living with all those well he's getting a bit he's getting a bit you can feel the tension building in him can't yeah it's just you know it can't be easy for brian well especially now i mean because he's all going to get very awkward with maranda isn't it because now maranda's having to go at lillian lillian suddenly realized hang on a minute i thought i was a pa and now apparently i thought i was i thought i was basically a mistress but i didn't have to sleep with anybody uh and i just got lots of new clothes and and everything else and and swarmed around showing off and then she discovered that actually she was in maranda's eyes she was a genuine pa and had to do things like organize her bikini waxes and so now she knows she's not moving back to the dauhaus but now she will start getting snitty with justin and that will accelerate their relationship and then she will end up having a proper relationship with justin while living with brian which is just i mean brian you know he's brian justin's brian's work colleague and they'll just hate it we'll just find the whole thing really cringy and awful won't he but i think lillian deserves some happiness and she does but i'm not sure justins where she's gonna find it i know but i think they i think they go well together they spark up each other don't they they're just they're so did matton lillian and look how well that worked out yeah that's true yeah you don't want to be asking me for relationship advice so you know just like yeah i think i'll do the sci-fi side of things and yeah i don't know i think i i mean maranda again was another comedy character was actually really it was like she's a woman over 50 therefore she can't possibly be nice or interesting she's just got to be a harryden yeah that's it and they can't you know why can't she just be assertive yes polite and assertive why can't but no it's got to be kind of and as soon as she walked in it was just like oh god here we go it's like it's like a kind of a 90s sitcom isn't it it's like they're all played by penelope keith yeah check book jenna that sort of thing you know it's kind of yeah my children with brian is man about the house isn't it oh god i've always been mad when brian goes you know about having to show his house everything i just imagine brian poddling round the house in a dressing gown that's come ever so slightly too open forever having to do it up again one of those one of those silk dressing gowns that's really short yes exactly with hairy knees oh oh that's not an image i want to think about oh new york nijer is next hello dumpty dumpty dumpty just a quick note say how much fun it was to meet people a couple of weeks ago who also helped the archers fans but who are absolutely wonderful such a great time together here in new york city and to thank witherspoon for being such a gracious host in such a wonderful new york spot two weeks ago and royfield how great to meet you wishing you all good things for your move stateside america has never needed more archers fans than it does right now i can tell you and if only you could vote anyway two things bye bye charlie hello mr. lettuce whatever his name was thanks lettuce for letting us know about the impacting maze on soil erosion you know haven't had already talks about it well then it's nice to hear from the character the hair the new existence and will probably never hear of again so number two oh i hate saying this but who's ready for a great story about elder abuse you know we've we've had a domestic abuse thing but elder abuse is really important subject probably more than the old marathon domestic abuse thing who do we want to see flapped around but i have to not careful research you know hours of research by the script writers and everybody else could be the next big thing could hit big time for the archers let's think we've got joe well yeah he's nearly went into a crack house peggy guess some of us are ready for a bit of elder abuse there oh she's not finished this sheet let's let's see if rod can give her a bit of a run for money horrible thing to think about we don't really want Jill to spend the rest of her life lying in her own wee wee up in bed somewhere but you know this story really probably needs addressing in the archers all of the old people live long happy glorious super duper duper lives and they live on and on and on but actually that's not what happens to all people in real life so if we've got a real life story there's your challenge script writers let's see if you can get everybody listening to that story oh dear sorry granted and i shouldn't put that end of a long day and wishing you all the very best and thanks for everything that you do and good luck with the transatlantic archers narrative thanks for everything bye now new york jart Nigel i think recorded this standing in the middle of time square with the bucket on his head judging by the peculiar noises that were going on behind him did you hear them yes i did and i do not my first thoughts were i thought he's having a party well that's right i thought my first thought was is why is everyone in the world having more fun than i am while new york Nigel was trying to make a very serious call yes it was yeah it was it was very noisy new york Nigel i'd love to laugh her in the background well i kind of you know i did think you know i've got people having a good time i'm not but there you go so it's um yes um elder abuse oh Nigel can we please just not have a cause just for just for the next six months can i not have to care about something i'd really like to not care about something and i don't want to start now getting worried about as far as i'm concerned elder abuse is what joe grundy and peggy woolly inflict on everyone else yeah i mean let's think about when joe was kind of at the yeah when joe was the free clothes do you know how to mean it was fast that was abuse on the rest of us wasn't it it was joe joe dressed hip hop it's just like oh god so no i tell you what though when new york Nigel said elder abuse i think this shows how yokele i am my first thought was what the trees i thought oh god that's even a very niche version of dogging that is yeah that is really isn't it yeah just like a hedge why it's just like an oh god yeah shall i tell you about my my theory about dogging in the archers yes well this is kind of a running joke between myself and god s diva and it's my alistair which is that he keeps disappearing at our times doesn't he is it's alistair around no he's just had to pop out at eight o'clock in the evening for an emergency we reckon he's going dogging this labridges his labies outside fell for shouldn't have just got a little bit busy but i think it's all got a culminate on a horrific bird watching trip which puts jim puts the voloculars to his eyes and sees more than anyone should ever see and sees a bit of veterinary equipment being used for something unconventional yeah but no i think you're right i think i'm going back to the call i think yeah no that's just enough with the issues i think i don't want this to turn into like well we've done this shoot let's have a let's have another meeting let's pick our next issue i want it to be character driven i want it to be this is one yoke or who wants it to get a bit more yokele again i want a bit more farming in there and i think this the last couple of weeks we've been getting a bit of that but again a little bit i want to be bored by shearing again absolutely and i mean i it was just we take the mickey about mr latif and being bored by adam about the but that's part of the reason that i listen it's to get that sense of what goes on in a farming community yeah whether it's the big issue stuff or whether it's you know the day to day how are we going to run this farm yeah what issues on this farm how are we going to get these jobs done yeah um and i thought in the last in the last year we've had homelessness alcoholism bankruptcy uh domestic abuse as potential affairs yeah and um the the plight of pregnant women in prisons well i mean god i've been going back to the what i said before i mean potentially we've got the alien abduction as an issue at all yeah what would we be seeing we'll be seeing press releases from radiophores saying well we felt it important to raise an addition being directed by aliens but no you're right it's just like i think i don't mind there being issues because there are in rural communities there are issues and one thing that i think has been overshadowed by the hollum rob story that should be being looked at a lot more is the issue of homes yeah the issue of the fact that you've got a family that's lived in um lived in that community for years yeah now finds themselves priced out of being able to even rent anywhere yeah yes now that's that's a rural issue yeah yeah it's it's a huge the village where my mum lives this is a huge issue basically there isn't anyone between the ages really of about 18 and 40 yeah it's either younger people or these older people yeah because in the middle it's just like well you either stay on and live with your parents yeah you've got to move out the village because there's no where to rent and there's a lot of second homes and you know it's i think that's an issue i don't know no i agree but i mean it's a major because it is it is the arches there is all you know when when crusty needs comes back to the village and starts saying oh i might look around for somewhere to rent and we all shout wah because you know there's and then all of us within within a week she's found somewhere you know and she's living with Roy um so when it kind of crops up as an issue when they want it to be an issue when it's just a fact of life uh when it's when it's when it's when it's some when it's a character that is actually moving a storyline along then miraculously room appears for them yes it's just yes houses appear just like the oven house yes wood um yeah i think it's i think that's uh i think that's an issue that it's worth exploring to be honest with you so there's me you know i think there are issues that i think would fit in with the whole kind of ethos of the arches and i'm not saying in any way that things like domestic violence and abuse isn't an issue in rural communities but it's it's not you know it's not the only issue yeah and there's other things on day to day basis that i think should be explored as well but i think this comes down to the fact that we've got so many plot lines that are just hanging in midair yeah um i think given up with root bee entirely do we know i mean what's happening with the hippie fart yeah well Kate's gone to the Bermuda triangle isn't she so we'll never know yeah root bee i think it just might turn up one day they'll open the curtains i don't know you know it's all kind of yeah so yeah just like oh look at a road absolutely nobody gets a shot there excuse me miss mid city hi it's miss mid city just wanted to say big cheers to Peggy from last week's episodes because she went to visit Helen and instead of being uh judgmental and rude and maybe a little hostile with her and showing she disappointed with her which is what i might have thought instead she was entirely supportive and loyal and dependable and sensible and down to earth and that's what Helen needs right now she needs to know that there is hope and that somebody's in her her corner fighting for her in her family not putting pressure on her necessarily in the way that Tom has but there and they've got her back covered uh so what she doesn't need and i'm glad that Pat is being kept away she doesn't need the hysteria and the hand-ringing so well done Peggy and not so well done to Anna Trigora and she's really getting on my nerves now because no barrister with a thriving practice is going to have time for these lengthy prison visits where she's attempting to investigate the case as well as gather evidence in order to be the advocate in the case it's not her job that's what the solicitor is for and if i were the script writers i'd go back to your legal team and ask them about how to do this properly because this is this is completely nonsense it's wrong Anna Trigora does not have time and apparently does not have the skills to get this information out of Helen and i wonder whether Helen given that she's demonstrating all kinds of symptoms of being totally traumatized wonder if she was ever fit to plead it's all being handled pretty badly and i am i am tired of the storyline now for slightly different reasons to to most people possibly and then lastly the thing that's got me scratching my head was what is the point of ed creating fairy homes in ambrage i don't know where this piece of whimsy has come from but it is pure foolishness and i'm not interested in it it's it's stupid what i don't get it i don't understand can it stop please yes cheers to Peggy and my god it is not often we say that but she actually i was all braced to for her to start being horrible and daily male and she was really supportive and nice wasn't she she didn't say anything horrible she she she actually was supportive and she didn't let Helen sort of wallow you know or or or give up she sort of you know lit a fire under her and said come on you're an arches woman you get get on with it we're made strong and you know of course i'm coming to visit you i'm 157 years old but of course i'm coming up on the train and whatever else and you know it was good yes i liked it it was that was my ambrage moment of the week yeah that bit where she said you're an arches woman and you are stronger than you think you are yeah that really got me actually and it was just like i was talking because it was just like oh it's Peggy saying it i think you know normally i'm kind of like oh shut up Peggy but i don't know she she oh god i'm full of the the comparisons to other things tonight she reminded me with that i don't know with you watch Game of Thrones yes the character Diana replays yeah Lady of Lenna yeah yeah she reminds me of Peggy because she can be really sharp-tongued yeah she can also be really quite nasty yeah but then when it comes to looking after her family yeah it's just like well like i might slag my family off but you come after my family and you've got to come through me yeah i think Peggy is one of the strongest female characters they've got and i think that's a bit underutilized sometimes as well i think sometimes it goes into the parody of all nasty Peggy and what but actually she's a really strong woman when when it comes down to the kind of you know when it comes down to the brass tacks she's got strength in her and i really love that bit this week her so bravo script writers i thought that was superb yeah and it wasn't as you said it was surprising i had to keep reminding myself and i was still waiting for her to suddenly say but of course it is all your own fault dear for you know having a baby by a sperm donor rather than doing it properly but she i suppose she is quite pragmatic and you forget well i forget that she has lived through a lot she's lived through her own disastrous marriage two of them well no one was good one was bad um and uh you know she's she's nursed jack through everything she's seen a lot and she's made mistakes herself and you know she is a kind of a well never mind how we got here this is where we are and this is what we've got to do to get out of it and that that was very refreshing after all the hand-ringing from part of her but i don't understand to me why can't you know this where do you think she is what do you think she's doing now and all that stuff well the thing is is that peggy whilst pet whilst Pat was doing the hand-ringing and tony was doing the kind of the oh well worse things happen at the CA you're just going to get on with it um peggy was actually thinking back and i didn't notice at the time peggy was um going around getting information she was going into the enemy camp if you like she went along she went to blossom hill and she was having conversations yeah and i think i think to be honest with you i mean maybe this is how the story is going to move on maybe it's not pat it's not tom it's not it not even hemry that's going to get her to open up maybe it's pat peggy peggy yes not pat definitely not pat pat i just sit there and weep and wail and and then tony will just say oh come let's just have a cup of tea shall we no peggy i think i think that's all he says all the time don't get yourself worked up god's sake i don't i don't like the phrase man up very much yeah but this is one occasion where i think it's it's appropriate which is tony for god's sake to get angry if that was my daughter i would be screaming mary hell yeah i would be you know i mean i'm just i don't know but yeah i loved it with peggy i love that but also miss mid city legal background i'm sorry but you know we get it's what we're saying it's not really being done right is it no it's not could miss mid-city not represent hell and should be great i think so yeah are you free miss mid-city and i mean free in monetary terms and availability because clearly this is a fictional case it will be paying you in fictional money but it will be a lot of a lot of fictional money if you like yeah yeah and of course fictional money doesn't exist so you know so everyone's all free always so so you know this mid-city becomes rich with fictional money and we don't have to pay any help because it's fictional everyone wins this storyline bloody well ends because obviously if miss mid-city does it we can bring it all forward so it all happens next week so by next friday we should all be done and dusted excellent that's right that's the trial next week trial next week that's lovely if we knew that next week say friday she was home with henry robert's in prison somehow and she has baby and everything's lovely yeah absolutely that would just be lovely yes that's really but what i'm worried about is we get september and they'll say oh put off till christmas oh god no they can't they cut they just can't they can i think i think i think there'll be protests in the street to be honest with them wasn't there going back this is going back a while wasn't there some this is years and years and years ago wasn't there a big kind of outrage protest because they tried to move the time that the archers was on yes there was i talked about this at that when we had our first quiz thing there was a march down upper regent street to um uh to broadcasting house and they had banners and it said what do we want no change when do we want it now what do we say please that's so radio for and i love it it's just yeah so you know i'm just saying i do i'm not saying anything i'm just saying if there's a trial delay well anything can happen couldn't it signs you know they can't they can't be they just can't but don't even let me i've just reconciled myself to september don't now bring in an even longer thing all right okay well that's not gonna i as you know my plot predictions are normally so wrong it's unbelievable so you should be safe shite so we should be fine yes yeah tell you'll be fine oh now we have some he may lorineras which i've only just remembered about okay on a minute jahan duer said ever since i heard the episode of the archers where arseula demanded rob sick pay i have wondered if he was in fact an employee at all didn't he elbow his way into working at the farm shot by taking over some of helen's shifts he was substituting for her as a favor not an employee unless his employment took place off mic helen is probably not an employee of the farm it will either be a partnership or a limited company in either case she would be part owner so she can't be made redundant and for god's sake can we have pat back well yes we'd all like to have pat back but didn't he because they then changed it to be a job share didn't they yeah i think it all comes down to whether he's got some kind of contract basically i think it comes down to and and i should know this because i you know i was gonna say you're all uni and up you should know yeah but this is kind of you know in the evenings i try not to think about it but i think it comes down to the definition between a worker and employee and they are different in the law um you know if you're kind of like self-employed that's one thing if you're a worker and not an employee so i think to run i think it's i think it's already muddled and i think that it's not absolutely definite that he qualified sick place i won't pay anyway even if he didn't i'd say take me some court you can add that to the long list Ryan Reynolds here from mid mobile with the price of just about everything going up during inflation we thought we'd bring our prices down so to help us we brought in a reverse auctioneer which is apparently a thing mid mobile unlimited premium wireless ready to get 30 30 ready to get 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 15 15 15 just 15 bucks a month so give it a try at mid mobile.com/switch $45 up from payment equivalent to $15 per month new customers on first three month plan only taxes and fees extra speeds lower above 40 gigabytes detail picture this you're halfway through a diy car fix tools scattered everywhere and boom you realize you're missing a part it's okay because you know whatever it is it's on ebay they've got everything breaks headlights cold air intakes whatever you need and it's guaranteed to fit which means no more crossing your fingers and hoping you've ordered the right thing all the parts you need at prices you'll love guaranteed to fit every time ebay things people love where'd you get those shoots easy they're from dsw because dsw has the exact right shoes for whatever you're into right now you know like the sneakers that make office hours feel like happy hour the boots the turn grocery isles into runways and all the styles that show off the many sides of you from daydreamer to multitasker and everything in between because you do it all in really great shoes find a shoe for every you at your dsw store or dsw.com right that's it oh now we need to have a bit of millie bell it's the story of a cultural superpower that danced and sprinted its way to success it brought the world reggae compound rasters hip hop bop molly much more its story is told to you in full color for your podcasting years it's the story of how jamaica conquered the world search for it on iTunes how jamaica conquered the world it's probably the best least known podcast and podcast on search for it today 1914 June Sarajevo the heir to the throne of Austria-Hungary Archduke Franz Ferdinand assassinated killed by a Serbian nationalist about six weeks later world war breaks out Germany Austria-Hungary, Russia, France, Britain everyone is drawn into its starting in August and then will America be drawn in listen to the first show exclusively on mixed cloud today and subscribe to us on iTunes beginning January the 18th from Washington to Obama 10 American presidents the new podcast from right field brown do you have a national trust sticker on your car do you think you could be best friends with kath kidson do you spend hours wandering around the airport looking for an organic quinoa cafe because you refuse to go to Burger King then Sarah Smith cloths offer you available from sainsbury's for the posher washer proud sponsors of dumpty dum I've just had a look at the dumpty dum shop they've got no track suits but they do t-shirts which are very flattering nice if you want to show off your figure a little bit Nick couldn't carry one off of course but I can so Royfield has asked me to find out from everyone here tonight where and when do you listen to dumpty dum? hello I'm Annie Brown aka tilly button and I listen to dumpty dum around the house mainly normally in the evenings and I'm a tilly button's dad Sean and I listen to dumpty dum while I'm cycling to work hello my name is Amy and I listen to dumpty dum regularly on the train from Brighton to London or London back to Brighton and before you ask no I don't know what Rex was doing there hello I'm Helen and I listen also on the train from Tumbridge Wells to London and back again hello I'm Beth I listen to dumpty dum in the car hi I'm Michael and I listen to dumpty dum on the train good day everyone interesting week on the archers but I notice it has a little inactivity on the dumpty dum forum and also on the Facebook page so that's my job to keep things rocking along on Facebook so I will work harder this week to get you more interested but the forum whilst it hasn't been terribly active has got some interesting discussions on there one of them is the ongoing discussion of still desperately trying to give a toss which was started by dusty substances people still talking about please can we give over with the Henry's daddy I think we did we did come to a conclusion with that and a big discussion about what's the deal with hell and not wanting visitors so please get involved you know without you we don't really have a show we don't have a forum we don't have a Facebook page so dumpty dum.com forward slash forums and get stuck in please we'd love to hear from you we were talking on the Facebook page a other job wondering whether he should be concentrating on his studies or should his entrepreneurial skills be encouraged regardless and Karan Cunningham said no he should be banned from any enterprise that involves marketing including any form of social media one massive pain in the arsenic in the family is more than enough thank you frankly i'm finding this sibling rivalry thing with new pip extremely tedious already although she seems to have settled on the one accent now so that's something yes i must say i did find that whole bickering thing in front of rex very odd i didn't think that kid a young person of her age would really have kept that going for quite so long but anyway what do i know i've only got three of them jane mitchell said yes he should be focusing on his studies i find i'm really growing to dislike business person josh putting his business concerns over his families makes him look like a real shy stuff that's right jane and it doesn't feel right does it mint but no time if the family is really most really the kids tend to grow up the same way too in my humble opinion a bit of entrepreneurial flair is one thing fleecing all around you or trying to do so would surely not be tolerated by his parents and not tolerated by a meal he'll have a bit of a crack but then it kind of tailed off didn't it anyway i shall put up some more questions to ask you to get some feedback from you for this week so please continue to stay involved the we also ask the question what should we ask our podcasters this week a bit of a side thing um we've we had a long line of questions and dear elit d leery said what's your favorite color no one asked once you get passed about 10 and mine is purple by the way and there's a lovely little thread under there which you really should read it's quite sweet including a picture of d leery's new purple tattoo i just love it so thank you dear you made me smile on a very cold day here in northern Victoria but the person who asked the correct question uh no now i've lost a name uh it was someone who said oh here we go a joe andrews who asked who was your first artist crush so i have asked the others and i'm going to have a bit uh do you get a bit here and say and have a guess i'm going to guess that royal field will say either kate or valen but kate is a bit flaky so i'm thinking valen i think lucie v is going to say brian because he's smart and funny and so she but he's a bit old for her so maybe i'm on there uh with a spoon was a bit trickier because there haven't been a lot of characters that i might associate with him uh so i'm going to say that he might be intellectually interested in jim but i'm not sure that he would have had a crush on anyone and i would a few years ago have said david because um he's very kind and he loves his family and you know these are qualities i like but this last year not so much i don't like the way he never asks uh Ruth uh when he's decision making and just seems to defer to pep it just feels really awkward so actually when i really thought about it i'm going to go with brian as well even though he's too old for me so there you go uh so until next week uh please get involved dumptydum.com or on the facebook page and until then hooroo okay i'd love millie bell stuff i think is and actually the thing with millie bell is that millie bell is my weekly reminder that i really should go on the forum and i really should go on to the facebook page a little bit more basically it's it it's just like i'm listening it's gosh that's a great discussion oh that's a great comment i should go on and then i just fall asleep so you know i maybe i should put it in the diary if we're gone sakes go or you'll upset millie bell yeah no because she does a great job and you know i feel as i should support that and she's a very calming soothing influence she never she never gets in fleck because some you know some there are some strange people who say inflammatory things and she never ever lets it get to her she's just very calm and very peaceful and makes it a lovely place to be which is it is yeah it is it's lovely so that's that's my that's my um kind of task for the week is be a bit more online so yes so lucy why are your top five hashtags archers tweets of the week well it's top four isn't it because you ruined one by the way yes so in a new format in a break from tradition what's your top four archers tweets of the week um becky black books uh was talking about uh peggy's prison visit so this is apparently the best day out peggies had in ages as she bought sandwiches and a hard boiled egg she did she did seem terribly keen to come well i'm coming again this is marvellous yes it's much more interesting to go off um when they're talking about um the birthing partner the potential birthing partner for Helen that was a discussion on twitter just in farrington said they should let pat be there all i have to do is tell her not to say anything stupid oh i'm already seeing the problem uh david martin um said mystifyingly but i did like it everyone seems to forget that peggy smuggled homemade custard to the resistance in france in world war two and possibly world war one i don't know what the hell that was about but it made me laugh and twitter boy oh yeah tweets of the week very good leonard ogician said if this is quote in quotes there is something pat could do but it might not work what a medical degree in obstetrics and gynecology in a fortnight i wouldn't just pat to deliver a postcard at the moment never mind a child but anyway there we are doesn't we're thinking about does it so brilliant brilliant brilliant tweets so if you'd like to help keep our little show on the road um there are two ways that you this can be done you can donate by uh you can donate by hitting the donate button on the site or you can go to patreon.com search for dumpedy dumb and you can donate two dollars a show which is about £1.30 and remember you can get in uh you can get in contact you can send us a voice message by speakpipe on the site or call 0203 031 3105 to leave a message you can find us on twitter at dumpedy dumb me @yobecorbet sera smith @sera_smith and harry at shampages and that's it so i think for the week isn't it it is i think we're done we are that was fun that it was fun i'm just going to send this to royfield before i forget so i don't get a cross text when he wakes up saying send me the file there we go lovely well that'll work very well very good right i really enjoyed that i was enjoying it it's great isn't it it is what are you going to do now you're going to go and have some dinner um i hope you did it very quickly when i got i probably have something more to eat because i need a little sandwich so i might go and get something else and then i'm thinking about um i tell you what i've written this book at the moment can i join harris the author yes her latest one different class is so exciting it's unbelievable really yeah it's setting a but it's setting a boy she wrote chocolat didn't she yeah and it's setting a boy's school but it's you don't quite know what's going on because there's a murder there's a diary being kept by somebody who might be the murderer who also might be one of the schoolboys it's and this i still don't know who the murderer is but it could be a schoolboy who's a psychopath and it's really exciting so that's probably one it's like one of those things you know we we think three in the morning i just do one more chapter i don't work anymore one more chapter so yes that's what i probably do what are you doing sounds really good i am going down to see the rest of my family uh who i haven't seen because they all came in and i said "shush i'm recording" and then this beard upstairs um so i must go and say hello to them all yes and um and all that stuff really also get the dog out of the bin which is where i imagine he probably is by now if no one's taking any notice of him or what is it with bins and you know so whatever you know there's my headphones in the uh in the water basket it's just odd things in bins that's the thing perfect gifts we've got them at Nordstrom rack stores now ugg nike barefoot dreams katesbade new york and more finds everything on their wish list all in one place steve madden yes please it's perfect did we just score the greatest gifts of all time yeah head to your Nordstrom rack store to score great brands great prices the greatest gifts of all time this episode is brought to you by progressive insurance do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash progressive makes it easy to see if you could save when you bundle your home and auto policies try it at progressive.com progressive casualty insurance company and affiliates potential savings will vary not available in all states all right all right brilliant welcome to dinner thank you very very much it's a pleasure thank you see you bye bye [BLANK_AUDIO]

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