DumTeeDum - A show about BBC Radio's 'The Archers'

DTD - 103 Helen lets rip, Bert is lonely and talk of Kanye West

This summary was conceived in Auckland!Whilst this podcast may be about The Archers our hosts never feel constrained so with Lucy powered by Gusto this week the following get name checks or more:Kim Kardashian, Kanye West, Amy Winehouse, Eric Gill whose alleged sexual proclivities do not alter his ability to design a typeface. Lucy then went Baskerville Gothic.As ever callers impress with the range & clarity of their knowledge & I can now report on farming in New Zealand having had a chance to look at farms in both islands.Millie Belle avoids the subject of rain in Australia.Everyone please listen to the podcast for your own sanity, if only to prove that others listen to The Archers.KosmoOn this week’s episode we have calls from Not Contrary who’s a font of wisdomKat Brown who’s dreaming about TitchynobNew York Nigel who thinks the writers need more confidenceandVicky Cole who thinks that Helen’s obstetrician is Toby

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Duration:: 1h 20m
Broadcast on:: 28 Mar 2016
Audio Format:: other

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This podcast is a Royfield Brown production. Find others on iTunes. All right. Here I know. Hi, I'm Sarah Smith. If you're the type of person that goes to Liberty as other people would go on safari and the fact that John Lewis doesn't have a funeral service makes you fret, Sarah Smith cleaning plots are for you. Sarah Smith available from Sainsbury's for the posher washer. Proud sponsors of Dumpty Dum. This week's show is sponsored by Jean Rose who would like to ask you to give something to a very good cause. But it's not money. It's something much more vital, much more fundamental than that. You see, she wants your spit or at least your saliva. Let me explain. Every year many people are diagnosed with leukemias and lymphomas. These are cancers of the blood and lymphatic system. Unfortunately, her husband is one of these people, having been diagnosed with rare incurable lymphoma in 2012. Some of those diagnosed will at some point in their treatment require a stem cell transplant. This won't necessarily be a cure, but can help people live longer and more fulfilled lives. And here's where you can help. Request a spit kit from either Antony Nolan.org, if you're aged between 16 to 30, or deletebloodcancer.org.uk, if you're aged between 17 to 55. Simply follow the instructions, give a sample of your saliva, and that's it. Your saliva is tight matched and you'll be placed on a register, which is searched when someone needs a transplant. You could quite literally save someone's life. How great is that? And it won't cost you anything. Thank you from Auntie Jean. [Music] This is "Dum Dum Dum the Shabbat". The reality of the doctor drama that is set in an ambridge in the heart of the Midlands. I'm the mobile hen house that is Royphyl Brown, and with me, I have the chicken-shit-filled caravan that is... Lucy Freeman. By the way, folks, I don't write these. I'm evil and read beyond belief week after week. This is Lucy. I'm describing myself as a chicken-shit-filled caravan. This is Lucy Freeman's self-hating and her self-loathing, and the last part of our towering inferno, folks, is good film, good 70s film. It kind of defined the whole kind of disaster movie genre, didn't it, to have an inferno? Yeah. Yeah, and all those airport films as well. You know, airport 77, airport 78, when there was all these disasters. But anyway, moving swiftly on. I mean, aren't there? I can't imagine any people flocking to the cinemas to see that at the minute. Very true. Just some of us sodding news. Anyway, carry on! We'll do this week's "Dum Dum Dum". It's brought to you by Jacqueline Bertes from Britney. And we've got Chris in Hilary Sanderson and a silent Emily Lucy. Can you remind our listeners that each month grows by a factor of something, right? How they can also win the "Dum Dum Dum" of the week? Yes, if you would like to sing us a "Dum Dum Dum" and give us a plot prediction or cheer up, but then ring us on 020 301 3105. We'll leave us a message on Speakpipe. Thanks to lovely champerages for her voices to cosmo for his podcast Roundups and to Sarah Smith for sponsoring us. Thanks also to Derek for learning the back bedroom. Derek's in a bit of bother this week. He's in trouble because he got overexcited at the hen house fire. He accidentally set the fire alarm off at the village hall and Bert Fry evacuated. That's naughty. You can't say. Not Bert. Don't be saying things about that, Bert. But you'll be Bert Fry. I felt very touched at many points this week about old Bert and Frida. It's a lovely old goat. Love him. Love him, love him, love him. But also on this week's episode. He's never going to get those boys out though, is he? Now he's let the fair brethren in. That's it. He'll be living in the caravan and they'll be living in the house. Well, let's see how that develops. After we've had calls from, not contrary, who's the font of wisdom, cat brown, or love me some cat brown, who's dreaming about tichy knob. New York Nigel who thinks the writers need more confidence and we have Vicki Cole who thinks that Helen's obstetrician is Toby. But before we get to the call of Rinerus on this truncated Easter show, let's hear about Lucy V Freeman's week in Ambridge. We started the week with Elizabeth being nominated for Tent Flap of the Year, courtesy of Lillian, who had a gigantic hangover and was drawing moustaches on Annabelle Shrivener in Borsett's her life when Elizabeth rang to tell her. "It's you, Elizabeth, that's made lower Locksley a go-to destination," she said. All more accurately, and run away from destination. Jill couldn't bloody wait to clear out of the place, trundling a long-pumping her writing desk behind her along the gravel. Then we got a lesson in seeds from David talking to Johnny. Seeds go in the ground and the sunshine and the rain make the flowers grow, said David pretending to be an acorn growing into an oak. "There's so much I don't know," said Johnny. "I can't see he's brilliant!" Then David completely bewildered him by saying that they were planting rye, Timothy and Clover, which sounded more like someone caught in the register at his LinkedIn primary school. Rex bought eight chocolate Easter eggs for him and Toby. "What are they, six?" Toby described Matthew as the northern powerhouse, making Toby a southern Wendy house. Then the hen house burst into flames. Toby rang the fire brigade and said, "It's urgent! Well, it would be really, wouldn't it? It's on fire, but it's fine, take your time." Toby said Bertie's gutted, as was the hen house. Was it arson or somebody arson about? Anyway, good job it wasn't the next day, it would have been the world's biggest rotisserie. Edward is got a certificate, his first ever certificate for spraying. It's going on the wall apparently, which will delight Caroline and Oliver when they come back to find a picture of Ed with his hose in his hand on the sitting room wall. Bert and Idra are having an open garden off. It's Rissurgam versus the Frida Fry Memorial garden, and here's where my Frida used to stand and fiddle with her clematis. I'm fed up with Christmas Linda now, and I want sneezing summer Linda back. Anyway, she's decided that her Rissurgam garden wants to make a statement. I think it's probably saying, "Shut up yourself important, old cow." They've let Rory out of the cupboard for Easter, no one recognised him, so he went to sit in the flaming hen house. Clary says, "They have bounced back after their horrible Anas." Then decided that Elf was making stuff out of her wallet, so maybe her Anas will continue being horrible for a bit longer. The end! Hoorah! Azar! Did it do well in front of that one? You went through that proper clip, and he went in with gusto. Whoever gusto is, yes. It's all out between me and gusto. Really? How long did you and gusto last for Lucy? Oh, about a week and a half. And is it gusto? Is he some Italian? Jousto. I think that means something, I don't mean... Well, shall we address the elephant in the room? Which is? The titular in the room. Well, I am going to piss everybody off now, so I apologise in advance. Wait a minute, is your chair got wheels on it or something like that? They seem to be like the... Is it bumping? Well, dear. It's me, I'm fiddling with the mind. Don't stop it. All right, now, go and upset all of Dondi. No, I've done media training this week on people, and I said to them, "Do not fiddle with anything on the table, and now I'm doing it." Well, there was a huge outpouring, a whaling and gnashing of teeth throughout the land, when Helen appeared to stand up to Titchinob and say, "No, I'm going to bed, keep me to go to bed." You go make the dinner. Yeah, I'm going to bed, goodbye. And she rang the doctor and said, "I'm not having the new baby at home, but..." And you also rang the helpline. Yes. Now, the helpline, as far as I'm concerned, was the most positive thing. When Rob is standing in the kitchen going, Helen, Helen, like this, we might sort of feel a short-term glee at Ha Ha. He's not getting his own way anymore, but he will not just give up. He will up the stakes. So before this ends, I think, unfortunately, we are likely to see some more violence and some more, but more outwardly hostile behavior, less devious, more kind of openly apparent behavior, because he will now be feeling threatened. Because up until now, she's been under his control. She's now coming to the realization that he doesn't not have her best interest at Ha Ha, by any means, and she's now contesting that control. And he is not the type of person that ever just folds up and backs off. As we've seen before, many times, and we know by his sort of man he is in terms of the profile of abusers, he will now up his game because he will start to feel threatened. And the one thing that people like him cannot have is any sense of their control being threatened. So I think it's going to get worse, I'm afraid, before it gets better, but it will be quicker. It will be like an injection, rather than a long-term flu bug, which we've all had for two years. That all sounds incredibly plausible, I thought. It wasn't. I wish we could have a lovely fairy tale ending where Helen says, "Get out of my house, you arsehole," and Tony punches him in the face. In what fairy tale does sleeping beauty say, "Get out of my house, you arsehole"? It's not the post-feminist book of fairy tales. Ah, right, good. Thanks for clearing that up. None of the Disney movies that I've seen, I've seen a lot of them frozen and all of that, Lion King, and there's no such language as ever used Lucy, but yes. But moving swiftly on, I thought to myself, "If they're going to go down this road, this is somewhat brave." I got the impression that Helen is reasserting herself, and actually we've got to the worst of it, and then this is her going, "No, I can stand up to you, and I can make my own decisions." However, that doesn't make for great drama, and there is no way that a man like Titchner is just going to take it. He might cook the odd meal here and here and there, but surely what we need to bring this to its head isn't more violence, but he'll say she provoked me, and that's the reason why I need to Twitter one, is that he's veneer of being this pillar and this supportive partner, that needs to be taken away. So something needs to happen in full glare of half of the village, and then everything will come tumbling down for it, for his nascent temper just to actually explode, and so it's not a case of, well, this could be viewed from this way and viewed from that way, and it's kind of understandable, it's just nakedly, "Oh my god," and I think that's what we're heading for, and we're heading to pretty quickly, I hope. Well, I really, really hope that's right, and I could see that because if he feels threatened, which he will now, because his power is diminishing, he's sort of cloak of invincibility that he's sort of drawn around him, she's seeing chinks in it, she's seeing that she doesn't always have to just comply, she's got options, there are people that understand blah, blah, blah, and she's also allowing him to be wrong, you know, up until now she hasn't done that, she's just said, "No, Rob must be right," she's sort of colluded with him on that, or he's made her collude with him, but if he is feeling more threatened, which he is, then I think you're right, and his behavior will now become more overt, so if that means over violence, obviously that's hideous for us to listen to and everything, but he will take more risks, and he will start to push his control in other areas, which could, as you said, well kind of expose him to people that he's conned so far. I was thinking, you know, I remembered something from years ago, a friend of mine, incredibly middle-class friend, when you say, you know, a lovely shiny family, you know, that they were a lovely shiny family. Note to listeners, this was before the start of the show. Sorry, yeah, and the day after they got married, they were on Honeymoon, and he said to her, they're in there, "So, you know, not tell me about yourself, it's a bit late for that," but you know, kind of, what kind of marriage do you see or something, and he said, "Well, the thing is, you can just never ever make me angry because I can't control myself," and he said that to her on the second day of their marriage. How long had she known him before they got married? About a year? Wow. And that was it. He thought that was entirely reasonable, and so did she, at the time, after she, you know, married him and found out that after, you know, after she sort of witnessed it. But basically, he was saying, "This is all going to work out fine, but you just can't ever disagree with me for the rest of your life." That's not quite what you said before, though. "Make me angry." It's not disagreeing. You said, "First off, he says you can't ever make me angry." Oh, yeah. But that is the type of, like, who got angry when someone disagreed with him. He wasn't somebody who could, you know, do rational debate sort of thing, and you just think, "My God," you know, it sort of felt like it, and it's one being trapped, you know, and she's looking at him thinking, "What? So I can't ever, we can't ever row. I can't ever do anything wrong to, you know, that you don't want me to do, and I can't ever disagree with you because then you're saying to me, "I cannot now, I've given myself a get-out-of-dale-free card. I cannot ever now, you know, be." And I hadn't thought of that for years and years and years, and then this storyline brought it all back. Well, that was one, for me, one of the kind of interesting kind of subtext to Helen's kind of conversation with Kirsty, you know, that there was, well, I'm not being abused. She didn't quite say, "I'm middle class," but that was the input, wasn't it, you know? Kirsty did say that when she rang "refuge," she said. Oh, yes, she did, she did. She said, she said, "It's not like he's not like he's, there are nice middle class family, it's not like he's hitting her," which is such a good line because it's, and I read on the website yesterday that all the lines that Rob's been using on Helen, like, you know, you're not exactly Kim Kardashian, are you, or Little Miss Giggly, or you've had enough of that or anything, were actually taken from the bait-in accounts from other women, women who have been in Helen's situation in real life. People had actually, the men who'd actually said those things to women. I was Kanye West wasn't one of those then, because he couldn't say that because he would be taught at Kim Kardashian. I was told you my son's obsessed with Kanye West. Oh, God, is he? I must admit, I find Kanye West absolutely fascinating, absolutely fascinating. No, do I, but if he wasn't, if he didn't have that much money, he'd be in the mortally, wouldn't he, quite frankly, because the man is completely delusional and unbalanced. But how much money has he got because didn't he then say to Mark Zuckerberg, "Can you give me 500 million quid because I'm broke?" Yeah, but I think his version of "broke" isn't quite the same as everyone else's, is it? That is very true. And he wouldn't be broke. But yeah, it is just like, "Hey man, have an enormous nervous breakdown. It's a bit, it reminds me a bit of Jamie One House, when you'd watch her on stage and you'd think, how are people still making money out of this woman? How do they sleep at night? How do they let her wander around in that state? And say, "Go on, Amy, go on stage. You could do it when she needs, she needed help massively." And there were people still around her telling her that she was fine and that because they still wanted to make money out of there. And I kind of feel the same about him really. It's like watching a tortured animal. You just think they need help, you'd help. I suppose that the problem is with any kind of creative genius and the thing is, it might be an ass on Twitter and he deliberately says things to be controversial. But musically, he's completely on another spectrum. So I was having this conversation with Noah when I was in Canada last time and he's just like, "Dad, dad, dad, can you, can you, can you?" And I was like, "Look son, he's a bit of a mediocre rapper at best and he's had a couple of hits." And when I looked at his histography, I'm like, "Oh my God, he did this, he did that." All these songs, which you're vaguely aware of, you go, "Well, he did the man's had about 30 hits." And you put it together and it really kind of knocked me sideways. And then when you read whether it's, and you go like, you know, critically acclaimed kind of music press with a rolling stone or enemy, actually about the lyrical content of what he's rapping about, you know, it's deep and profound. But the problem is with any kind of creative is what makes you great, your self-obsession and your single-mindedness, then makes you then spiral out of control. So it isn't just the enablers around you. It's that innate drive, that innate kind of, "Well, I have this view on the world," which is slightly askew to everybody else. And it's then made manifest in my music and it's different and it's so creative that, you know, to have that then rain back and then you have enablers around you is incredibly hard because you will say, "The reason why I am successful is because I am like this." But then it's the reason that destroys you at the same time. Yeah. There is a load of goth talk to that artistic genius, though. I've noticed that quite a few women manage just to be very, very good without having to have a public nervous breakdown, apart from Amy Roundhouse, which I've talked about. But, you know, they just get on the thing, like Helen Mirren doesn't need to stop around and have, you know, she just gets on with being brilliant and having award-winning series everywhere and Oscar films and things like that. And she doesn't feel the need to, you know, go on Twitter and tell everyone that she's the Messiah. Well, to be fair, to 50% of humanity, i.e. the men, not every male that's in the public eye is Kanye West and has meltdowns as well. So Trump, though, though, I will say the more prone to it than women. That I will give you, you know, that women seem to have a general mental fortitude that us men don't have. Gently. Well, you middle-class types have got your domestic to do for you anyway, haven't you? Well, it depends. Some of us, yes. Some of us got so much. Right. Now, before we go into a social, cultural, kind of barbed fight with each other, why don't we have some callerenaress? Hello, Ambridge 3962. Right, Freeman, who is first on the lines? Mary, not contrary. Oh, well of Mary. What she got to say for herself this week? Hello, Dum de Dum. It's Mary, not contrary, in Toronto. At the risk of straying into Cosmo's territory in Peddent's Corner, I would like to answer Shuler's question from Tuesday's episode, "How on earth do you comment on a typeface?" Well, I do have comments on Linda's typefaces. Linda had just emailed Carol Toboggan, asking her what she thought of the century gothic font. Century gothic is a sans serif font. It's basic stone cutting that you must have serifs when you're cutting letters into stone, because otherwise, without the serifs, the stone cutter has nowhere to insert and remove their tools. This is really basic stuff. I know this because I'm married to a typographic nerd, and he backs me up on this. So, either as Linda's working with an incompetent stone mason, stone cutter, or as Lucy said in last week's episode, the editors have just lazily gone down the list of fonts in Microsoft Word, and I think we deserve better. Thanks, and goodbye. Mary, I thought this was absolutely fascinating, which makes me as big a geek as you and your other half. It never crossed my mind that that's why you need serifs. This is why I love this show. You learn so many new things, none of which are to do with the archers. But anyway, yes, he leads somewhere to put his tool in. Yes, very, very interesting, and yes, I do think that was a bit of a, you know, I was genuinely thinking, are we really supposed to be listening to somebody reading, you know, just fonts? How long can, how long can a storyline about, this is the kind of storyline that when people say, you like this archer's thing, don't you? I might give it a go, you feel like going, no, this week, no, excuse me, let's turn that off off off, don't listen anymore, because now they start listing fonts, you know, you just think, hello, I'm listening to, but that's part of the charm as we know. But I think for a newbie, they might run off screaming into the forest and we never see them again. I did found it absolutely fascinating. And I did think to myself, only on a radio drama, can we have a 10 minute exposition about typefaces? You know what though, it's made me change my, my font on my own computer when I say my, now they're going different because I started to think, maybe I should have a signature font like Linda, like a signature font, mind you I was clearly supposed to be doing something else at the time, like my expenses or something. So wait a minute, what did you change it from and to? I changed it to, from aerial, because the type of BBC like things in aerial, I changed it to Baskerville, old something or another. What? Yes. Are you doing that? That's from one extreme to another, isn't it? So, aerial is the most kind of like bland functional. Yes, I know. Not anymore. I'm now a gothic nightmare. That's what I am. I couldn't be more gothic if I was wearing badly applied eyeliner. I'm going to have a look at it now, Baskerville old face, because I have got quite an old face, so it works quite badly. I'll stop it with your old face. I tell you, I have my go-to font, um. Sorry. Listen, I'm having my Linda Stell moment. Let me have it. I love Gill Sands, right? And there are quite a few like Gill Sands, and it's a Gill Sands is the font of the London Underground. So there's things like for sure, a condense. There's quite a few which I like it, but the problem is with Gill Sands is he was a dirty pervert. What? He was. Um, Mr Gill that came up with Gill Sands. So the the font of the London Underground, did you not know that? No. Oh, no, no, no, this is the person. Right. So he, and I'm going to get this wildly wrong. So I'm just going to give you the briefest of brief overviews because it's one of those things where you're kind of aware, because obviously I do a bit of graphics and whatever. So you're kind of aware of these things, but there's been many a documentary about him. He slept with his daughters and all sorts. He, he, so he was around in round about the 1920s, the 19s, maybe up to 1930s. And he's great gift to mankind. He's Gill Sands. So, sans serif. So it doesn't have the twiddly bits on the end of what Mary, not contrary, he's talking about. And it's the font of the London Underground. So that really clear, um, graphically pleasing, you know, nice, nice books. I've just looked him up. Yes. It's everywhere. It's everywhere. He, he was an actual sexual, uh, beast and, uh, slept with everybody, including his daughters. And, but this was a thing. So it wasn't, you know, and they, I'm going to say this in air quotes, they were happily sleeping with him. He had such a dysfunctional family. You know, they didn't see it as abuse. Yikes. Oh, is that your mum? Yes. It's, uh, I think it's time for West Indian breakfast now. She's on the landing, but she's obviously holding court out there. Eric Gill, I think his name was. I'm sure he was. Eric Gill. Yeah. And it said there have been programs about him because he just, yeah, yeah. Hello, Tom, it's Kat Brown here and I'm sitting in bed with my own Kat Brown Ambridge sitting on my lap who has climbed into it because I have just listened to the Maundy Thursday episode that I imagine a lot of people are going to be talking about on next week's podcast. Um, before that, thank you so much for the amazing hundredth podcast extravaganza live. It was amazing to meet people. I'd never met Sarah Duggars and Andrew Horn in the flesh, say nothing of Lucy V Freeman. And that was all a complete joy. And actually, it's the memory of that amazing evening that's sort of making me stop from just completely freaking out. I've just listened to that incredible episode of Pat the Tea Party after having had a really, really lovely evening out. Came back to lots and lots of WhatsApp messages from people going, "Oh my God, it's all kicking off. You need to listen to this episode now." And, yeah, it's only just now listening to it that I realized just how much it actually has kicked off. And I can only imagine what happens on Good Friday and through Easter. I mean, I imagine that Good Friday might be a bit calmer, but who knows? Part of the reason I wanted to call in was because last night I had the models most absurd dream, which involved me, first of all, going ice skating with a load of people playing ice quidditch from Hogwarts because that's naturally how dreams start. But it then turned into me being Helen in the arches. This is how sad it gets. And deciding actually enough is enough. And filled with anger, telling Rob to fuck off. And then running outside, finding my in real life, God children's, God parents. And then also, patent Tony Archer. And telling them all that I was leaving Rob that he was abusive and they'd hit me. And feeling metaphorically and realistically as though I'd just run out of a building. So to have had that last night, and that is a very sad dream, I acknowledge, and then to have had this episode tonight with Helen starting off, you know, really defending her cub as it was in Henry. And then ending with Rob doing that awful boa constrict act that he does. And Ursula doing exactly the same thing on Pat is just devastating. Just an amazing piece of writing and acting this week. And I have to say that because I need it to be acknowledged that it was amazing acting and writing. Because the reality of listening to it was just so hard. Anyway, much love to everybody. Particular thanks to JJ Sexy Hills, who I sat with and her chums during the 100th episode. And thank you to everybody for just making this an amazing podcast. And speak soon. Cheerio. I had a dream last night. Sorry, there is nothing more boring than people. I know not yours cat because yours is relevant. But I had a dream again that I was Helen same as you. And I had a baby. And it was miles too early and very, very, and it died. And then they brought it back to life again. And it was called clover because of flipping David going on a Mark clover in the mix. In the field mix. Oh, I tell you this story. I'm really got to end all we're all going to go cracked up, aren't we? So basically people having dreams about the arches and about Rob. One of my friends, one of my mum's friends had to stop listening to it because she was having nightmares about it. Or no, she couldn't actually get to sleep. She found it too agitating because every time she tried to relax, she was thinking about it. And she stopped her sleeping. So she's had to stop listening completely. It's silly, isn't it? I think it is because it is because we can't see it. I think what's like children, what if you don't tell them the truth, what they imagine is far worse, if you don't tell them a nasty truth, what they imagine is far worse, then what the nasty truth actually is. Talking about the nasty truth, just bringing this back to Eric Gill. So, children, if you've got little nippers, you might tell them to go out the room. He just wasn't right this man. So hence, I never feel comfortable using Gil Sands. And I said it with all seriousness. I didn't realize to the extent. His personal diaries describe his sexual activity in great detail, including ex-ematrol affairs, incest with his two eldest teen daughters, as I said, ancestral relationships with his sisters, and acts with his dog. Good lord. Yes. I'm going to, I'm going to delete him from my font list. I don't think he preasts probably the buggers slowing it up. That's awful. Absolutely awful. Absolutely awful. And his wife got her to wear a girdle of chastity. I don't think she should have been the one wearing that to be perfectly honest. Yes. Well, this now is as clear as folk as this. As font designers know there isn't. No. No. Right. So, we've done cat. Shall we nip over to New York? Yes. And have a bit of Nigel. Hi, Roy foiled and Lucy and worldwide dumpy dumbers, New York Nigel here. You know, from time to time, this program makes me cry and I have to admit that Helen's call to the helpline was one of those moments. So I feel a bit bad about what I'm about to say. I'm cross that they made Rob such a caricature villain. Outwardly nice people sometimes treat their wives or their partners with just as much cruelty while being popular and well-integrated members of their communities. Why did we have all that business about the colder to the bigotry and viciousness without a manion? The manipulation of Charlie, the bopping of the hunt saboteur, the cheating at cricket, shouting matches with the contractors at the farm shop, nastiness with Johnny at home farm. We could all go on. You know, at one point, if anything went bad in the village, we were ready to blame him from decomposing dogs to a flare-up of Linda's allergies. We're all sick of listening to the story, not because the incidents between him and Helen are so believably horrendous and very sadly true to life, but because he's generating too many stories around him. He's sucking so much energy from the other characters who we love and we know to be nuanced and complicated. I know the script writers can't win and they're really brave for taking this story on. They've clearly listened to women in the front line of domestic abuse, but it's almost as if they didn't have enough confidence in their ability to convince us that he could behave that way towards Helen without getting us to hate him for so many other reasons. In America, over half the victims of domestic violence reported their place of worship first, men or women, and I ceased to be shocked at how seemingly nice people behave towards their partners behind closed doors. And that's one of the reasons I want this story to be over. Most domestic abuse isn't perpetrated by pastiche villains. Cued us to the writers for daring to expose domestic abuse so bravely. But I'm ready for a goddess diva ending to this one. Bring in the wasps on a sort of donkey of Arnie sucking down into the nether regions, preferably with whales from evil Ursula. You gave us an all-round baddie. Now you owe us an all-round baddie ending. That's all I've got to say this week. And thanks for everything. Great job for the 100th and hope to speak soon. Bye now. Nigel Nigel Nigel. I could not agree with you more. I think possibly making him ultra nice to everybody else, i.e. not cheating at cricket, not blocking up the culvert, blocking up the culvert, whatever. I think that, shouting at Jim, I think that we are in soap land, lest we forget, and I think that would bring in slightly too much ambiguity. But you know, to be fair to him, not him, but the script writers kind of thing, through him, he has convinced her parents pretty much, well, she's definitely convinced her parents, he's pretty much convinced her whole family that he's nice and that he has her best interests at heart. I think people are suspending belief about him being nice. They say, well, he's a bit, you know, he's a bit, this, that, the other Rob. But you know, he's got Helen's best interests at heart. That's where I'm going, I'm going to disagree with you there because I know this is yesterday's show. So Sunday, which, strictly speaking, we're not covering. But Peggy said he's not just a pretty face. He's done so well. And Jennifer has frequently said, oh, he's lovely. And he's, you know, he's looking after you, Helen, et cetera. Yeah. So it's not just that. But I will, I will completely, though, I couldn't agree more with what New York, I just said, no, I haven't done this in a long time. To that. Because it was a brilliant call. So, and I think that, yes, you've said this, this is soap, and yes, it is soap. But they've dealt with a topic, which is very on soapy. And they've played it out for two years and a length, which is extremely on soapy. You know, I don't think the topic is on soapy. I think the handling of it has been on soapy. Um, there's been quite a few domestic violent stories, but it's all been over this period of a fortnight, hasn't there? No, but what, but why this is, and I know he has hit her. Oh, because it's coercive control, right? Exactly, it's coercive control. And, and a lot of it is so subtle. And, and, and again, as, as we know, just about any one of those instances, taking an isolation, you can literally just shrug his shoulders, you know, not towards the end, obviously. But initially at the start, which is the reason why a lot of us men didn't pick up on it at first. We didn't pick up on it at first. You just think, Oh, he's just a bit of a blokesy bloke. And literally, I said that two years ago about the whole thing about don't give me that, um, couscous stuff. I just want, and that in and of itself, quite innocuous, but it led you on this trail where he was a bore. That's exactly what he is. And the way they've done it with that level of subtlety and the amount of time they've invested in it is incredibly on Sophie. Back here, you know, we've had domestic violence in Brooks. I've had the jaw dashes we had. I forget the name of the family in EastEnders in the late eight, his early nineties, and he was Scottish and he was hitting little cat or something like, I really can't remember the name of the characters anymore. But this specific coercive control, unsoapy. And in lots of ways, actually doing it through a radio drama is a little mow. A little mow. Well done. Well done. And actually doing coercive control through a radio drama is actually much more powerful because it is the power of words all the time, all the time. And the picture you build up in your head and the tension that you build up is far worse than anything anyone could actually portray on screen. And it's very, as we're saying, it's hard to listen to it on headphones and things like that. It's because it is very, very claustrophobic. It's just you and this voice, which is how Helen feels. And that's why we can empathize with Helen so much because she's trapped in this room. And she's trapped in this very small cottage. And when the door bangs open and we hear Helen, we go in the same way she does because we, you know, it's a claustrophobic and environment. There's just the physical closeness of him. Completely. But, you know, New York Nigel, I think there is a job for you as Lucy's co-host on the podcast because you've been saying what I've been saying, but you managed to pithily put it into about three minutes where I just like flabberly and sloppily said it over two or three months. But the thing is, it's not just this important storyline, but it's just the fact that the whole thing is just unbalanced. And admittedly, the script writers can say, or Sean O'Connor can say, oh, no, no, no, no, no, because you think the screen time, the airtime actually isn't. But it is, in terms of a two-year storyline, you know, David and Ruth, look at the amount of things they've gone through in two years, losing them. They're going to go into New Zealand, you know, up and down the motorway, et cetera. All right. So at this stage, at this stage, normally, if it wasn't for this storyline, we would now be talking about Shuler and Doki Locky and Elizabeth and what's going to happen there. And, you know, no one's even pretty, no one, that's hardly been mentioned on Twitter. Yeah. Or we would all be talking about a widow as grief, you know, readjusting to life after being with your partner for 50, 60 years, et cetera. And what this says about the rural elder, you know, being elderly, and the rural elderly. Also, there's another storyline which we have not touched on at all, which is to do with rural crime. Because remember, Ed had ease cattle go missing. And now this thing's gone up in flames. Yeah. So there is another backstory here, which is very clearly there, but we don't give a rat's arse, basically, do we? No. Because the oxygen has been sucked out of the room. I do admire Bert Fry, though, because as soon as I'm widowed, the first thing I'm going to do is bring in two two young rugby playing men in their early twenties. Absolutely. Well, to be fair, only one of them plays rugby, but Lucy, to be widowed, don't you first need to be married? Well, that's true. Once I know it, you know, three hours in, I shall cast off my widow's weeds. And it's open house property, as far as I'm concerned. Yes, absolutely. We have Ricky Cole now. Yes, please let's go to Kenya. Hello everybody and happy Easter from here in very sunny Kenya. I've not been very well for a few days, and I just was too scared to listen to the arches. I didn't feel strong enough. But fortified by my dumpty-dum-pajamas and guzzling lambship out of my dumpty-dum-mug, I felt strong enough to catch up. Oh my goodness, it's been a very hectic few days. Things are moving. I'm very pleased that Helen finally called the helpline. I'm very pleased that she seems to have changed her mind about the home birth. I'm very, very pleased that Ursula was gone. But I'm still scared. I think there's a long way to go. I'm scared for Helen, and I'm scared for Henry, and I'm scared for Kirsty. And I think there's, we're not anywhere close to a conclusion in this yet. So we're all going to have to be brave and, oh my goodness, in other news, lighter news. I'm enjoying Bert very much, especially when he told Linda off. I saw that was great. And I think we finally solved the mystery of Brighton. Did anybody else think that Helen's obstetricians sounded exactly like Toby? Maybe in Brighton, he's welcoming at the Royal Sussex County Hospital. Who knows? Anyway, that's all for now. All the best. Bye! Yes, Vicki. I am also scared for everybody else. I don't know whether it's going to be. I just hope it's not Henry really. It needs to be somebody who can punch back. Yes, Helen's obstetrician did sound like Toby. He's called Mr. Anand, which I pretty makes him Asian. He's a consultant. And as far as I know, Toby is not Asian. I'm sure if he was, they would have mentioned it, because they do like to bang on about diversity. But yes, who's they near the end? You know, you're sounding a bit like Donald Trump here. I mean, the BBC, they liked it, you know, like, who she couldn't just come and live in the village. She had to have a member of the national from AKA Roy Tucker dropping dog poo through her letter box. She couldn't just be there, you know. It's like having a, you know, about a gay couple and the main folks at the store is not that they're gay. It's just something else that's happening to them, you know, that kind of thing. But we're not yet at that place, are we? We're still in British media anyway. We're still all look, you know, somebody different. Let's talk about some issues and you think, oh, blimey, do we have to? You know what? That's a tricky one, though. It really is a tricky one, because I know this is easy to check. My privilege, this is easy for me to say is the one who is represented unbelievably highly on radio for, yes. Well, everywhere. But as a card-carrying member of an ethnic minority, you can make you carry carbs, that's awful. Well, I'm going to back up from that. The Irish recognition never mind that. But what you do want is not necessarily issues per say, but you want cultural, let's say peculiarities and with a small P to be outlined in a realistic way. So, one thing that Lenny Henry said, who has been banging on about this, is on Luther, right? So he's running around and he's doing whatever and, you know, looking fantastic. Well, he doesn't know. He looks actually worn and beaten up and he always wears, you know, these weird off-grade clothes, doesn't he, in Luther? Idris Elba is doing his best to look his worst on Luther. Everything else, he looks great. I don't care. Really, he'd have to, I don't know what he'd have to do. Well, we could have another conversation. Maybe we will about Idris Elba, because Idris Elba is the ethnic minority choice, man of choice for white ladies, the planet over. It's a bit like white men saying, oh yeah, I fancy Beyonce. So, yeah, whatever. Right, that's acceptable, right? But moving swiftly on, right? The point that Lenny Henry has made about the portrayal of, let's say, Luther, of course, you can have a black D.I. or whatever the heck he's, his rank is, I don't know, all right? But he will have an Uncle Festus, and he will have to eat rice and peas every now and then. And there is no reference to that. So, it's not a case of, well, he's had to struggle to get his position in the police force, and there was subconscious racism over racism. You know, we can move past that. It's just a case of every now and then, you might just fancy a patty, you know. That's what people want, right? And people go, yeah, okay, right, you know, say he's, you know, he is British, he's a metropolitan male, he's very good at what he does. He just has to come wrapped up in black skin, which also probably means there's going to be the odd little racial cultural trope, sorry. And I think that is, is incredibly important, you know. But where were we? Well, did we get onto this? Vicki Cole in Kenya. I mean, it was because I lost attrition. Yes, he said he was, you said he was Kofi Annan, didn't you? But whilst we're here, and I don't want to make anybody feel uncomfortable, because I know that we have many people in the media that listen to our wonderful podcast. And people in the media, I've always, well, not always, I'm always struck whenever I walk into that BBC foyer. You want to watch that? Yeah. Who is it? I generally note when I walk into new broadcasting house, you know, I've got a little meeting with somebody that that front desk, portrays a racially diverse London. Yeah. To the point where it's top heavy with the diversity, let's put it that way. All right. And then you walk through the doors. And the people going through the doors are all right. And exactly, then it's a snowstorm. Just saying, just saying. So, I've never noticed before, but you're absolutely right. We can have all this hand ringing at the BBC about diversity on camera. But it just shows you that even an organisation that will at least claim lip service to, no, to be fair. The BBC does more than just pay lip service, because it does all the hand ringing and whatever. But it's one thing to have your front desk and your security guards who are black, brown, and whatever. Yeah. But all your production assistance, all of your people just running around hither and dither, they're all white and invariably from a small subsection of British whitedom, I would even say. And on that note, I'll slowly back out of this conversation, because I don't know, saying like, I want some black panther, I want to burn down edifice of, you know, you're doing a podcast on the archers, love, I'm not sure. And yeah, well, there is kind of a, there is kind of a reason for that, if we're going to go into this, maybe let's do because we've got a short show this week. No, only because to get, sorry, this is probably revealing too much about BBC. But to be honest, to get any media job in, well, yeah, not just BBC, any media job, you either have to be in London or Manchester, I would say. And I'm talking from sorts of experience and from knowing people who've tried it, you also have to be prepared to work for nothing for quite a long time. And I mean, literally nothing. You have to be an intern, you have to do work experience, you have to be a runner, you have to be whatever. And so you wealthy parents or parents who live in London who can afford to put you up for nothing. And I'm talking for like sort of six months stretch at a time. And the media, getting into the media, partly because of worthless media studies, and all kinds of things like that, people, you have to have a certain level of privilege and income to be able to access it. And it makes it a closed shop, which is how you end up with nearly everybody in the media being privately educated, white parents who have a nice house in Hampstead or Surrey or whatever that they can commute in from. If you're a black kid in Sunderland, number one, there's Sunderland, the northeast has in the day, the lowest percentage of ethnic minorities in any region in the UK. So a white kid in Scotland, you still wouldn't. A white working-class kid. Yeah, a white working-class kid. And so if anybody was to do half of a decent Google on me, they'll see that I was dragged over the coals about five years ago for having interns at the previous company where I used to work. And I thought that I always treated them very well. And it was just for two weeks. And if you wanted to stay on for longer than that, you could. But it was very clear. It was just for two weeks. And I was also really aware when I was forced to think about this, that it was exactly what you said, that it was only a certain type of bright-eyed bushy, bright-eyed bushy-tailed 20-year-old that could actually afford to, whether it was come down to London for a couple of weeks or crash at their friends or whatever the heck that it was. And then subsequently to that, what I did do was to go out to a completely different organization and to get kids that had all been completely through the state system. And this was then part of their media studies course. And that was the reason why they were actually being placed with companies and they got full accreditation. If I'm speaking honestly about that, that was much more of a logistical ballache because they had many more issues, practical issues. They had other things they needed to be doing. Some of them were just doing the course just because they were just doing the course with something to do, etc. And actually the quality of person that you had in terms of their work output was far less. And they needed more support. And if you were running a small enterprise as I was, you need people who can just get on with it. Exactly. So you understand that the reason why companies' organizations can just get lazy. But what always struck me about that debate? And I'm totally against it. It's one of the things where in hindsight, I absolutely see how it just perpetuates a system. But I understand if you're in the middle and in the middle of things, you can't see the wood for the trees. And it's more effort to do things in a different way. It's much more effort. But the thing which I was found so ironic about that whole kind of debate was the fact that for newspapers to expose internships where the biggest culprits are absolutely the biggest culprits. But then the other thing, which you kind of touched on, is there's two issues why this is really pertinent to the UK is that number one, we are two London centric in this country. We're a one-city country, we're a one-horse town, we really are. And yes, the BBC has now gone, part BBC has gone to Manchester, but not as much as ever thought was ever going to go. They thought more of the BBC's infrastructures are actually going to go. And comparing contrast this with any other major western country, we don't have diffuse centres of power. So, and I have said this before the previous podcast, but in the United States, if you want to make it as an actor, you go to LA, possibly New York, you're in LA, you want to make it in software, you'll go to San Francisco or the Silicon Valley, you want to make it in aerospace, you go to Seattle, you want to make it in politics, you go to Washington, you know, I could go on and on and on. You want to make it in the arts, you go to New York. The answer for all of those things in the UK's London. So, you have a disproportionate amount of, let's say, bright-eyed, jushy things in one city, which kind of deudes your Birmingham's, your Bristol's, Manchester's a slightly different case admittedly, but your new cast was your Sunderland's of these, you know, bright-eyed and bushy things. So, you have this massive network effect whereby, again, it's a one-horse town, a one-horse, you know, yeah, Britain is a one-horse town. It's the same types of people that can afford to make the move, and it's the same types of people in every type of industry. And if you specifically, if you look at the media, American media is very interesting. So, you will see the ABC affiliate in Atlanta, Georgia, and they will have Black news anchors. You will see the CBS affiliate in Dallas, and they might have an Asian-American news anchor, and it's no big deal. And you can actually rise and be an ethnic minority in the media in the States, at least regionally, you can actually kind of get quite far because they have much more media as well, much more compared to what we do. Everything is just so centered around London in this country, and it's to the great detriment, really, are structurally how this place runs. And then, and I say to Americans all the time, and don't get me wrong, you know, Americans always think when I go over there that I kind of, kind of, knock American, I'm absolutely don't, but you're forced to think about the differences between the UK structurally and the US, and invariably you do do a compare and contrast. But one of the great things about the political system of the United States is because there are 50 centers of power, the state, so you can become a state senator or congressman or governor in a way that there aren't 50 different centers of power in the United Kingdom. It means that the president of the United States, whoever that is, invariably didn't go to one or two schools. Doesn't, didn't knock about in just one or two universities, and get up to frolics and hijinks. Yeah, from where he then, or she takes her entire cabinet. Exactly, and you cannot stress to people how limited our political elite is when you compare it to just about anywhere else in the Western world, and the terrible thing is about Britain. It doesn't matter what your politics is, it's not a right or a left issue, but in terms of a wider enfranchisement of British society, we're actually contracting when you look at who's actually running our companies and running the country politically. So I can't remember if I've said this before, I'm done to be done, but I had to do a charity thing, and it was a charity auction, and the bidding started at £1,000 for this auction at the end of the dinner for a charity, the bidding started at £1,000, and there were 12 different prizes, and eight out of the 12 were internships that people could buy for their children. Wow. And I thought, how is this fair? How can you possibly say that internships are open to everybody? And they were internships at Procter and Gamble at, or sorry, I mustn't say the company name, there were internships at very large companies, very large media companies advertising agencies, architects, I can remember one, you know, national household names, things that would really stand out on your CV, and you'd think, goodness, this person's, you know, must be a very, very good candidate to get, to get that opportunity, and actually it was because their parents had a lot of money. Lucy? Yeah. Sorry. Let's not try and put the country to rise. Just now. Because, you know, it is an Easter bank holiday, and you know, it's a time for families to be together, to celebrate the fact that Jesus died, and then was risen. Let's talk about something that's not always top of mind, but still really important, life insurance. Why? Because it offers financial protection for your loved ones, and can help them pay for things like a mortgage, credit card debt, it can even help fund an education. And guess what? Life insurance is probably a lot more affordable than you think. In fact, most people think life insurance is three times more expensive than it is. So with state farm life insurance, you can protect your loved ones without breaking the bank. Not sure where to start? State Farm has over 19,000 local agents that can help you choose an option to fit your needs and budget. Get started today and contact a state farm agent, or go to statefarm.com. The holidays are all about sharing with family, meals, couches, stories, grandma's secret pecan pie recipe, and now you can also share a cart with Instacart's family carts. Everyone can add what they want to one group cart from wherever they are, so you don't have to go from room to room to find out who wants cranberry sauce, or whether you should get mini marshmallows for the yams or collecting votes for sugar cookies versus shortbread. Just share a cart and then share the meals and the moments. Download the Instacart app and get delivery in as fast as 30 minutes. Plus, enjoy free delivery on your first three orders. Service fees and terms apply. My dad works in B2B marketing. He came by my school for career day and said he was a big row as man. Then he told everyone how much he loved calculating his return on ad spend. My friends still laughing me to this day. Not everyone gets B2B, but with LinkedIn, you'll be able to reach people who do. Get a hundred dollar credit on your next ad campaign. Go to linkedin.com/results to claim your credit. That's linkedin.com/results. Terms and conditions apply. Linkedin, the place to be, to be. Take away our sins. So, on that note, why don't we take five Avotuchimili Compact with Tweets of the Week. It's the story of a cultural superpower that danced and sprinted its way to success. It brought the world reggae, calm power, rasters, hip-hop, bob molly, much more. Its story is told to you in full color for your podcasting years. It's the story of how Jamaica conquered the world. Search for it on iTunes. How Jamaica conquered the world. It's probably the best least known podcast and podcast on. Search for it today. I'm not so too far. That's the right system. It's going fine. 1914, June, Sarajevo. The heir to the throne of Austria-Hungary, Archduke Franz Ferdinand. Assassinate, killed by a Serbian nationalist. About six weeks later, World War breaks out. Germany, Austria-Hungary, Russia, France. Britain. Everyone is drawn into its starting in August. And then, will America be drawn in? Listen to the first show exclusively on Mixcloud today and subscribe to us on iTunes, beginning January the 18th. From Washington to Obama, 10 American presidents. The new podcast from Royfield Brown. Do you have a national trust sticker on your car? Do you think you could be best friends with Calf Kitson? Do you spend hours wandering around the airport looking for an organic quinoa cafe because you refuse to go to Burger King? Then Sarah Smith cloths offer you. Available from Sainsbury's, for the posher washer. Proud sponsors of Dumty Dum. I've just had a look at the Dumty Dum shop. They've got no tracksuits, but they do do t-shirts which are very flattering. Nice if you want to show off your figure a little bit. Nick couldn't carry one off, of course, but I can. Good day everyone. Millie Bell here. Well, I'm sure that there's been a lot of discussion about last week. Very, very dramatic. And I, for one, just want to say that I absolutely applaud the actors. I thought that was so well done. We have been busy on both pages, although I noticed that people aren't really touching on the dramatic story. I think it's almost too hard to talk about, isn't it? On our forum, there's been a lot of support for Henry and his role in the proceedings. There's a great discussion about the remote control chicken house doors. The International Dumty Dum must sing along ideas, still bubbling along there. I think it's a great idea. The most irritating character is still bubbling along, and someone's asking whether Bert is going to go rogue. There's also another thread about Henry. So if you would like to get involved in any of those and get to meet your fellow Dumty Dumbers in an even more cozy situation, please go to duncydum.com and please join in. I'd love to see you there. On our Facebook page, we were talking about the scene where Bert tries to invite David in for a cup of tea and, or a cup of coffee, and David has to go. We thought it was a little bit sad that David couldn't spend five minutes. Sue Gage says, "It's unlike David, the cake eating gourmand to reject the law of carotrigorans' food load, especially if it was homemade and contain the special ingredients you suspected of using by many listeners." Yes, poor Albert, but I was left wondering about the blower machine. What was it, and why was it so vital? I could only think of those silly things people used to blow leaves around in parks. I need enlightening, and Connie Nolan long reply with, "I may be mistaken, but I think the blower machine is the vital bit of kit that dairy farmers use for storing up the pens and barns where the cows wait before milking. Sometimes they are kept inside for weeks, so changing the litter is important." I'm actually really glad you clarified that because I thought it was those leaf blowers, which I have to tell you, are really popular in Australia. Come autumn when everyone's blowing their leaves, and I never know why. My thinking is, if you don't like the leaves, don't have the trees. Personally, I love the leaves. Anyway, Glenn Fuller loves his the fur. This was before the Fair Brothers moved in. He said, "The Fair Brothers are definitely moving in for my money. Albert will react the first time one of Toby's conquests is at the breakfast table. Is anyone's guess?" And the general consensus seems to be that the Fair Brothers are a decent pair of lads as a pined biker. Let's just hope they don't, well, one of the brothers doesn't walk all over him. And we also had a bit of a discussion about how the Egglewell fire started. And Ben Hardy suggested it was Josh. He's an evil mastermind who pretends that he wants a piece of the competition, but in fact, just wants to get rid of all pretenders to his egg empire. Jenny Murray suggested Rob. Obviously, no pasture decks in the shop for him. Helen Samson blames Helen because everything is her fault. Nicely played, Helen. Witherspoon said a big thank you to whoever did do it. Call me a horrible person, but I was quite pleased. Then, unless it was Rob, then we'll just check in in jail. And Richard Woodfield suggested it was an awesome guy, and I'll just listen. That's a little bit harsh. Anyway, lots more suggestions on there, and we haven't resolved that storyline. So if you would like to get involved, please find our Facebook page. And get to join in. Our listeners, the number of people who like our page, is steadily listening. We have a lot of people who like the page, but don't get involved. Can I really encourage you to get involved? I love getting to know our listeners, as I know Robfield and Lucy do. So please respond to one of our posts, or start a post yourself, or message us. We'd love to hear from you. Have a great week. I hope the Easter Bunny found you, and hooroo. Thank you, Millie Bell. Lucy. Yes. Quick emails we've got to do. Izzy says, "The grondons have moved back to Grange Farm. Alfred's returned. Things are going well between Will and Ed. How do you know? We haven't heard from William for about eight years. Too well, my prediction, Joe, is going to die. Happy in his bed at Grange Farm. Then they can all go back to normal." She says, "Joe, like a death wish. Everything's happy now, Joe. You could go." We didn't talk about Alf, did we? I don't think it's him nicking the... No, he did. No, he did. No, I think he's covering for somebody. I think it was one of the children. I think it was George. Do you think it was George? Yeah. I don't know why. Georgie. But I always look for conspiracies where there are none. So possibly that didn't happen. Ro-ro-roses. Ro-ro-roses. Yes. Says, "Once Ursula leaves, Rob will abuse Helen in some way that causes a miscarriage. Both will require treatment, treatment, treatment. Hers medical, his mental. Then characters, actors and listeners will be given a long rest after this horrific ordeal." Can I just make a plea? To have more emails, please. Yes. Oh, hang on. We've got one from Cosmo as well. Sorry. Oh, yes. Came at the last minute, didn't it? Yep. "Helen must keep her cool and stop losing her temper no matter to the provocation. Cosmo, I think that's quite a tall order. He's threatened to take her child offer. Every time she loses her control, Rob wins either directly or in the eyes of others as they simply series unstable." Well, yes. Lucky, really, that Rob has no job to keep him in ambridge. Yes. I wonder what happened to Peggy's £10,000. Poor continuity knowledge again this week, we know that Lillian went to school with Eddie, so Alpha Lillian would know each other from those early years. It surprises me that Jill's dislike of the fair brethren is so great that she's turned arsonist and fired the hen hutch. It is also hard to believe that the caravan was smaller than the Burt-built egg mobile. In NZ, a competent shearer does 350 sheep a day. I presume you mean she is them. Is Johnny going to manage one of these? Unless it's Eric Gill. I don't think Johnny could manage one minute of anything, to be honest. He's so blooming dopey. So, yes. Thank you, Cosmo. And we have Cosmo's financial report on the, we'll do that next week, which is on ambridge organics/bridge farm. Ooh, smashing. Do you want to do this off the week? That'd be quite nice, Cos I know you've got a nip off. So, you best rattle through these at a pace. Andrew Langston, second city suit, said disappointed the book of Contolence has been removed from Tib Shelf Service Station. R.I.P. Heather Petters. Linda, whose muddy hooves said, "Allister has put a £50 bet on Shuler to win the doctor in the next month." And this isn't an usual one. This is hashtag of the week, which was a thousand ways to end Rob Titchener. And there were some absolute brilliant ones. Mole said, tip him in some slurry, Murray. Jane Davis said, drowning for Booth Ruth. Margaret Guest said, "Burn into a cinder, Linda." And Alexis said, tip him to a lion, Brian. And then Anne Gillian said, "And I have done this, Anne. I am completely with you." Just had a heart-stopping moment. "Thought I had forgotten to log out of my business account, and all my the archers' rants had appeared on the business timeline." Hi, I'm back. And John Reed, it's Tweeter of the Week. Which was just, yeah, just summed it everything up brilliantly. Rob, have you made a start on supper? Helen, make your own fucking supper. Yes, it's what we all wanted to hear. Right, it's been a cracking week in the old archers, hasn't it? Yes. It has. We've had loneliness, we've had potentially the resurgence of Helen's independence, we've had Henry, even Henry's turned round and basically let be known that, you know, daddy ain't all great, you know. We've had, we've seen the back of Ursula. Thank God for that. It's been a week to rejoice. And on that note, I think we can just about wrap things up and say goodbye. Now, folks, I implore you to go to Domdidom.com to visit our shop and to partake in our forum where currently the debate is on about all manner of things, mostly a rotating character. There's a little thread there about. Henry, go there, enjoy, get stuck in. Lucy. Yes, sorry. Pay attention. News, news, news of reviews. Thank you. We only have one review on iTunes this week. And remember, folks, iTunes is important to Domdidom because with it, we get to go up those iTunes charts, which means maybe more to us than it means to you, but it means that more people get to listen to our gatherings. So we'd like you to go into iTunes and to write reviews. Now, we have one, which is from Deepest Darkest Heaven, who says they have been listening to the podcast for a few months and have caught up on old episodes too. It's good to know that I have fellow archers fans out. They're all screaming at their radios. Good mix of serious chat on storylines and cylinders highly recommended. Now, if you'd like to keep help, keep our little show on the road. There are one, two ways that this can be done. You can hit the donate button on our website or you can go to patreon.com search for Dumpity Dump and you can donate $2 a share, which is about £1.30. And there have been a couple of new patrons in the last month, and I will mention you next week. Remember to get in contact. You can send us a voicemail. Remember to get in contact. You can send us a voice message via speakpipe on our website, which is obviously www.dumpdump.com. Or if that's up the Frits and you just need to get through to us, you can call us on 02030313105 to leave us a message on social media. You can find us specifically on Twitter. We're at www.dumpdum.com. You can find me when I'm at Royfels. But R-O-I-F-I-E-L-D. Sarah Smith at Sarah_Smith or Harriet @ Shumbridges. And on the book of Face, you can find us by simply typing in Dumpity Dump and then you'll bump into 1,100 like a lurkers who are just liking and lurking or things Dumpity Dump and Ambridge. And that's it from us. Pair of old, unreconstructed lefties who believe that diversity is the key to social cohesion. Well, we do, don't we? And the archers as well, she says hastily. Well, to be fair, you know, if they had an Indian corner shop and they had, you know, some kind of rent a raster on there, how representative would that be of rural England? Is Alice not a raster? I always thought she was. You don't think that at all. This holiday season, when you can't be there, let 1-800-Flowers.com deliver. At 1-800-Flowers, every gift is crafted with care and designed to make spirits bright. From classic holiday bouquets and unique, one-of-a-kind designs to gift bundles, you can't find anywhere else. 1-800-Flowers makes it easy to stay connected, no matter the distance. Just a few clicks and your thoughtful gift is on its way. Visit 1-800-Flowers.com/acast to deliver joy, beauty, and celebration this holiday season. My dad works in B2B marketing. He came by my school for career day and said he was a big row as man. Then he told everyone how much he loved calculating his return on ad spend. My friends still laughing at me to this day. Not everyone gets B2B. But with LinkedIn, you'll be able to reach people who do. Get $100 credit on your next ad campaign. Go to LinkedIn.com/Results to claim your credit. That's LinkedIn.com/Results. Terms and conditions apply. LinkedIn. The place to be. To be. You're just saying that for comedians. I am. I know. So I go now. It's like I like me to be. All right. Toodaloo. Take care, Lucy, for even. Bye-bye. [ Silence ]

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