DumTeeDum - A show about BBC Radio's 'The Archers'

Dum Tee Dum Episode 57 – Its Tuesday, its Dumteedum time

Dum Tee Dum Episode 57 – Its Tuesday its Dumteedum time

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The post Dum Tee Dum Episode 57 – Its Tuesday, its Dumteedum time appeared first on DumTeeDum.

Duration:: 1h 11m
Broadcast on:: 12 May 2015
Audio Format:: other

Hey I'm Ryan Reynolds, recently I asked Mint Mobile's legal team if big wireless companies are allowed to raise prices due to inflation, they said yes. And then when I asked if raising prices technically violates those owners to your contracts, they said what the f*ck are you talking about? You insane Hollywood f*ck. So to recap, we're cutting the price of Mint unlimited from $30 a month to just $15 a month. Give it a try at mintmobile.com/switch. $45 up from payment equivalent to $15 per month, new customers on first three month plan only, taxes and fees extra, speed slower above 40 gigabytes of details. Forging ahead together drives Colorado's pioneering spirit at Chevron, we donate funding and volunteer thousands of hours in support of the communities we call home. We also employ our neighbors to deliver the energy needed as the state's largest oil and natural gas producer, all to help improve lives in our shared backyard. That's Energy in Progress. Visit colorado.chefron.com. This podcast is a Royfield Brown production. Find others on iTunes. This episode of Dumty Dum is sponsored by easy fry oven chips. For those days when cows are more important. Oh no. [Music] I hope you to amilly. It's at Kingberg area of Toyota here. I think that's about as good as it's going to get for me and the mandolin. This instrument is far too hard and I'm just going to keep it as a piece of art I think. Bye. Because this is Dummy Dummy show about the reality ducky drama that is centered on amperage in the heart of the Midlands on the herbal layer that is Royfield Brown. With me at the boggy march that is Lucy Freeman. And the most important part of our pasture folks is you. Now today's rendition of Barric Green was brought to you by Kingberg carrier on a mandolin note list. Did you hear it? You've heard it haven't you? Of course I have. But it sounds like bagpuss. I thought he sounded like Captain Carelli's mandolin. I'm sure he'd rather sound like Captain Carelli's mandolin. Oh no. Wasn't Captain Carelli not very good at his mandolin? Well it could knock out a little bit of a tune but I was drifted off and all of a sudden I was in the eastern Aegean in 1943. Well I was sitting watching listening to that man say a soggy old cloth cat, tired and a bit loose at the seams but Emily loved him. That's all I can think of. Oh it's lovely. The days of bagpuss say. Yes that will make any sense to anyone that wasn't born in 1972. But there we go. Well I was born in 1968 and it makes sense to me you. Oh okay we know any. Give me before. Yes. All right cool. Now Lucy. Mm-hmm. Can you remind our wonderful, gracious, cuddly listeners haven't been the accolade of Dermot of the week. Yes. Are we being nice to them this morning? That's nice. Normally we're insulting them because they haven't called in. Uh yes. If you want alone Kent and some money confessed to pinching phalan's bunting or sing us a dumpty dum. Please get in touch either via Speakpipe on the site or ring 0 2 0 3 0 3 1 3 1 0 5. Thank you to Derek for the loan of the back bedroom again. Um Derek thoroughly enjoyed the election. He stood for the natureist party. He didn't do very well because there was a noticeable swing to the left. So wasn't Mattie swing to the right. It depends which way you're looking at Derek really. Ah yes. Very true. Very true. You know what? Mm-hmm. This week we've got calls. We've got napkin trail all the way over from Canada land. She's back and she wants to know who's who. Kirsty Dingell who's a first time called Renora and for that we salute you Kirsty who thinks that you Lucy are smart because you've nailed Shuler. Yoko Bet who's in the wilds of Wiltshire doesn't mention the S word anymore. She's very good and he's got dental issues with a spoon me old mucker me old pal. A bit of the old Walter Gabriel in me there. Um who thinks that Ed needs to please himself and Dusty. My girl Dusty who's glad about the dressed salmon. Now Lucy. Mm-hmm. Before we get to those juicy bits why don't you tell us about the last seven days in Ambridge? Okay well we had a right you are Anna hello you too which was rather jolly it's always a good week when you get both. We all got up early to go and listen to the little birdies going cheap, cheap, cheap. Oh Jimus if you are serious about courting anti-cardboard your flirtatious chitchat could do with some work wiggling on about worms. Why not just show your athlete's foot while you're at it? Anti-cardboard in her turn is worried about her crack and it's even worse when it's damp. Anna Sol love that's all I'm saying. Robert Snell is slowing down to a sort of robot like verbal. Now is he having a really long drawn out stroke of some sort? Should we be calling from medical help? As everyone else seems to be ignoring his transition from Robin cooking to Stephen Hawking. Then we had Rachel from the Environment Agency, Big Wet Rachel. She was actually Pip Archer and Debbie Aldridge morphed together this is getting ridiculous. Jimus commented on how tall Big Wet Rachel was. She'd have to be tall otherwise she'd be wading around up to her gusset in floodwater you der brain Jimus. Rex and Toby I have realised are talking sheepdogs. That explains their names, their ability to seemingly be everywhere at once and they're falling and panting. One of them told David that his family had a loose connection with the archers. It's a bit harsh calling Elizabeth a loose connection but rather appropriate I feel. Someone's pinched Fallon's bunting harassment is organising a SWAT team to find it but it's only a matter of time before Joe wanders past wearing it as a sort of phone arrangement. Ed wants something simple and local like Ed. Ed has asked Eddy to be his best man which is sort of only man in Ed's case. Best of a small and very rubbish group of men really. Charlie sat in the ball on his tod celebrating his plaster coming off. He sounds nearly as desperate as Kenton for a party. There was a bit of uncomfortably laboursome flirting with Pip who has suddenly become an overnight sex pot and is being chased after by one of the fair brother brothers. We have discovered that the fair brother brothers like playing games with funny shaped balls. Let's hope someone mentions that to Pip or she'll get a hell of a shock. We got a lot of grunting and sighing during the shearing which made me think things are moving on slightly faster than I thought at first with Pip but then I remembered what a strenuous activity shearing was. Flirting is so heavy handed in Anchorage it's like primary school. I like your hair will you kiss me? No I will not kiss you you are a smelly bumhole. So the smelly bumholes all tripped off to the polling station and I am holding them entirely responsible for the result. We had a little jaunt to Grey Gables. Soul's ferrets this time which made a pleasant change. Montague had an aperitifen Francesca's done something funny to her hair. Nope me neither. Clara Love decided to wear the side board to the wedding. She will have to have the doors taken up but other than that it's a perfect fit. Caroline and Oliver tried to buy an engagement present for Ed Nema but Ed refused. I bet Emma said "oh that's right Ed you did the right thing" and then gritted her teeth and ripped up a 14 page wishlist from Underwood's tracksuit department. So Caroline and Oliver hang on if we've got Ed Nema maybe we should have Coliver, cauliflower. Okay cauliflower are going to buy Clary a dress for the wedding. That is actually a very nice thing but foolishly they are asking Susan to tell them Clary's size and favourite colours. Susan will be wearing burka text she won't want the competition and is exactly the sort of woman who will tell cauliflower she is two sizes bigger than she is and her favourite colour is mushroom. And we ended the week with Joe and Eddy singing songs about cobblers appropriately enough and Joe admiring Edward's tackle. And then he hauled out a bit of emotional blackmail to Clary and persuade Ed to ask his loathed brother who is also coincidentally his fiancée's ex-husband to be his best man. He said he'd think about it. Ed, think about it and then decide that it is the most stupid idea in the history of the world's most stupid ideas and then dismiss it from your tiny mind. The end. Oh that's quite good this week. Thank you very much. Well done that is bloody fair brother brothers. I know. Hey bro, yo bro bro bro bro. For god's sake. Yo bro, we got a yo yo. Fair brother brothers. Yo bro. Yeah it it until we can discern who's actually who. Which one? Exactly which one's Rex and which one's Harrison. And I suppose this kind of faux bonnet and bro-ness is just you know smacks as being a little bit kind. Was this medical thing? I don't know. He said my bro is having medical checker. I bet they wear rugby shirts with the collars up don't they? Oh they really do. And then he said since he's accident but no one's you know we'll probably find out in about a year and a half that he's got one leg or something and just no one's thought to mention it. What were they only having one ear? What? So yeah, I wish they'd get on and tell us though. You know you know the names Rex and Harrison. And Harrison. And Harrison. God there's two Harrison's. No you know it's not Harrison don't you? No it's Rex Harrison. Billy Connolly said when he was working on that film with Judy Dench about Queen Victoria. Oh yeah. Mr Brown. Yeah. Mrs Brown. Oh yeah that was it. He said he's opening gambit to her was Bonnie Prince Charlie the only one I've ever to be named after three golden retrievers. And whenever I think of Rex and Toby I just think them as boinging floppy you know golden retrievery. Hang out. Tikes. Yes. Not exactly overly full of character yet but we'll see. Give him a chance. We've got to bed in a bit. We want someone to try to bed in with Pip aren't they? Yeah which one? I don't know. Exactly. Yeah. It's uh it's quite uncomfortable hearing Pip being flirted with. I found it quite uncomfortable anyway. Why? I don't know. Partly because I could you know I think of her because I am obviously older than her and I think of her as a child and I think the way she sounds you think of her as a child. You know because in my head she is because of you know because I'd remember her being born for goodness sake. And uh you know and I think get off. Get leave her alone. Go you know. Yeah I don't know. It just sounds horrible and I found the Jude storyline. Did you know I didn't realize I started doing what this I didn't realize I thought this. But yes I do feel quite protective of the younger ones when they suddenly start you know having adult feelings. I get all funny about it. God I'm going to be a nightmare with my children aren't you? If I get like this about fictional people actually what I'm going to be like when my daughter starts dating. I will kill them all. My little boy um 14 couple of years ago he uh said to his mum. Oh there's a girl in school I like and your mum says well you best tell your dad because he'll tell you what to do. I don't know why she said that. No neither do I but anyway. So he called me up on skype dad. What do I do? I was so sweet. So sweet. And uh showed me a picture and he says and then I walked past her in the in the hallway and yeah what do I do and uh bless him. I did have such a moment I actually welded up. Oh it's just like you know so growing up. Yeah well for the first time so far normally if if if I think my daughter's got you know like we tease each other and and she if she goes on about somebody aren't you? I say oh you love him and she goes shut up shut up. That was stupid embarrassing. What would it do that? And then at the um uh at the train station we um bought a coffee well I bought a coffee for the for the journey we were going into a meeting or something and she was coming with me and um we left the coffee thing and she said oh he was cute she said about the bloke behind the counter and I just I froze I didn't know what to do. I thought do I react? Do I not react? What do I do? But if she was right he was very cute and it was quite nice little mother daughter bonding moment. But it was the first time she'd done it non-ironically without going huh you like him you know or any of that it was just quite yeah I can recognise attractiveness in another person then it you know it's not a thing it's fine. Did she say this this person she thought was cute? Was he kind of non-descript and incipidly white looking? No he wasn't and I know where you're going with this you sad little man. He was about 24 in Italian so she has extremely good taste I would say. And like a mother. Now anyway I've got her spatty down my keyboard thank you very much. Um I reckon we should get on to our calls because we've got a few. We have. Right now. Hello ambridge 3962. Hello dumpty-dum it's Mary not contrary in Toronto. I just wanted to share some thoughts and reflections following several weeks where we've heard from various dumpty-dummers that they find it difficult to distinguish between cast members particularly with some of the newer characters. I'm not actually having that problem and I'm quite surprised to hear such a level of discord around this and I'm trying to work out why this could be and I wondered if it's perhaps that I'm pretty musical my pitch is pretty good and I'd be interested to hear from some of the other musical listeners perhaps Jan from Cannes or Claire from Scotland by Canada to see if they experience these problems as well and I do recall Lucy saying that Harriet from Shambridge sort of finds some of the male voices difficult to distinguish or maybe that's not quite what she said but there was something there about the genericness of their voices and obviously Harriet's just had a baby so can't comment immediately but at some point when you do have her on maybe we could explore this a little so explore this a little bit more or maybe I'm overthinking this and it's just something as simple as audio quality if you're listening to the archers on the radio while you're doing the washing up and it's a crappy old radio set then maybe it's not as good as when I'm listening to it with my headphones on in crystal clear podcast um glory uh be interested to hear other people's thoughts on this bye uh not contrary who says she doesn't have a problem telling the voices apart I defy you to tell the fair brother brothers apart this is um she says she's very musical and she thinks that helps in hearing different pitch um but I do find I swear it is almost like they're copying each other I can't believe that they have deliberately found actors that sound so similar because it's not I've said this before and I'm going to bang on about it because speech is one of my things so tough but top new tom and charlie have exactly the same inflections they leave the same funny pauses mid sentence and it is whether this is a new acting style that's come out and this crop of sort of early 20s actors this is how they've all been taught this is something that the vote each remember um in the 90s when neighbors first came to the uk and everyone started going up at the end and we had this whole generation of children that had what they call the neighbors inflection which makes them sound really hesitant whether or not it's something like that and that there's some generational thing coming at the coming on and all the actors that are coming into mainstream theater and and and same at the moment up have this kind of common way of talking very breathy lots of drops lots of big gaps in the in the middle I don't know but it is absolutely extraordinary because the uh the water woman big wet Rachel sounded exactly like a cross between Pip and Debbie and it's just it's just straight it's just really odd I'm I'm thinking am I going mad is no is has nobody on anything else has this been mentioned on on on feedback or anything I'm you know is it just me being over sensitive or have has other other people not noticing that it's not just they it's not just oh we haven't got used to the voices yet so we don't know who they are but they sound exactly the same to the extent that we're creating like one homogenous archers actor because in the in the in a couple of years ago they used to talk about the fact that the country actors on the archers like Will Grundy sometimes comes seems to come from Yorkshire Roy Tucker's a bit Birmingham which is what he should be. Clara's Oxfordshire Copsworlds which is why she gets confused with them Pam Ayres who is from Brown there um you know they're all at considering they're all born and brought up in Ambridge they're from all over the country in terms of the sort of origins of their country accents um and they used to call it mama set which is you know mama's being the old word for for actors it was just this kind of default generic country yokell voice um but now we've kind of got a mama set of of you know of the middle classes it's it's I just find it staggering and something is it's just really weird there must be an explanation there must be so that's a very very long winded comment on not contrary's thing but yeah well well I'm glad you can tell them apart you'll have to tweet everybody and go quick it's so-and-so and now it's so-and-so and now it's so-and-so just so we can all keep up but the third brother brothers are impossible I mean I can see why that would be difficult you couldn't have one who's kind of three who's three you know um chromatic scale was below the other one uh but yeah it's just very very odd um yes I just think it's really weird anyway nevermind next we have with a spoon post-election greetings from Witherspoon and Angus Haggis in New York City to Lucy Royfield and Dumpty Dumber is around the world so it's true next week Royfield and I are going to have the first international summit of Dumpty Dum's new government we waste no time I'll be in Toronto along with 15,000 other psychiatrists for the annual five-day meeting of the American Psychiatric Association perhaps I'll wear my new Dumpty Dum t-shirt to the sessions I did wear today when Angus handsome husband and I went for a walk in Washington Square Park maybe I imagined it but I thought I received a few subtle wings and nods of the head in recognition of the shirt I want to thank Diane got a steva and others for sharing their thoughts and feelings about Rob in last week's podcast your insights were important to hear we must give credit to the archer's writers for creating a character who has been both provocative and realistic and who has served us a springboard for discussion of significant social issues once again this past week we saw Rob manipulating Helen and as Diane said Helen being scared of disappointing and losing Rob certainly relationships like Rob and Helen exist for years and years in real life I know I have treated women in Helen's position and have long used the term gaslighting in therapy but this being a quote contemporary drama in a rural setting we will have to come to some de new mom in the not too distant future on to other characters while I've always been a member of team will I have great sympathy for Ed this week it is not Ed's job to fix his relationship with his brother on his marriage altar and he shouldn't have to worry about making his mother happy on his wedding day as the late Rick Nelson who would have turned 75 today sung in his 1972 hit garden party but it's all right now I've learned my lesson well you see you can't please everyone so you've got to please yourself besides do you think Emma will be thrilled to turn to her husband to be ready to exchange vows and see her ex-husband behind him glaring at her three other brief points first I'm excited to see David turn into Sherlock Holmes as he investigates the mystery of the one block culvert what the heck is a culvert anyway second I already don't like Toby fair brother we can see it now pips going to have to give up the chance at an international job for him didn't she watch the last episode of the season's girls I recommend all view it finally enough about the excitement of the voting process in the words of doctor of Star Trek's Dr. McCoy damn it Jim I'm a doctor not a political analyst finally congrats to john the first on your engagement I wish you and your future husband all the best and Royfield don't forget your passport I'll see you in toronto and I'll even buy you a pint but Lucy don't lament I still may be coming to London this summer what do you say then he's looking forward to your international summit for new government yeah do you realize Royfield you are going to be in a town with 15 000 psychiatrists 15 000 psychiatrists are all going to descend on Toronto when you're there you are going to be like some kind of freak show for them they're going to love it every all your little weird ticks will be commented on so what I'm going to be bush talks I'm going to be trotted out on stage am I yeah no they'll just be following you around with notebooks why would he do that um yes the debt I agree the day new more for for Robin Helen cannot come fast enough for me now although I don't want anyone to get hurt but I reckon that intrude intrude the kind of um a subtle in the following the sort of the subtle path that this this storyline has gone I think that it's going to be Rob blocking up the culvert that is going to catch him out because he I realized yes oh sorry we've not supposed to talk about sunday but something happened yesterday that made me think he's now like he's now trying to control so many people he can't someone's going to crack he can't possibly someone's either going to be brave enough and it will be David he can't possibly control all the people he's trying to control he cannot squash down everybody and that's what he's trying to do and the more he's discovered the more panicky he will get and that will as we've said before that will lead to the the you know the horrible recklessness where he will do something physical um and something dramatic but uh yes he's just he's set up a situation where everybody he he's got the reins and he is desperately trying to rein everybody back and you can you can do that to one or two people if they're carefully handpicked as Helen was but you can't do that to everybody and I think what's going to happen is um you know captain culvert david will uh will will be the one that says no rob i'm not having that you know you you you risk the entire village and then there will be an awful scene where where poor Helen has to choose how would suggest it will be for us urbanites which is like 95 oh you're going to ask me what a culvert is thank you well with the spoons ask me what a culvert is a culvert is a small animal with a spoon it's a bit like a badger and in england uh we eat it on the third sunday after set to a jessima love but yes it's it's quite common if you come here you'll see loads of them scampering around yes can you now tell us what a culvert is this? it's a ditchy thing like a drainage ditch that's exciting isn't it right and why possibly would one have been blocked why would you do that i don't know i don't think i know enough about that well i definitely don't know enough about them to know why you would uh do you think they're qualified to be doing this podcast because you're supposed to be your rural affairs sorry do you know what i'm going to google why would you block a culvert and i bet you it bet you anything someone else has already googled that why would you block a culvert um now i can't my phone's not working uh but yeah no probably considering this word has been bandied around for several million episodes and we still yeah look what are culverts and what happens when they are blocked engineering channels which maintain water flow da-dee-da-dee-da-dee-da mmm ah if the culvert is blocked or even partially blocked the flow of water is restricted which means that he would be blocking it to prevent uh uh to prevent because what he was worried about was that uh if there was a flood the cow cubicles would be damaged they would be flooded and he would have to move all the cows out of berry farm or move them further up so to prevent that happening he blocked the culvert so the water couldn't get through at all thus diverting it elsewhere and therefore causing overspill elsewhere i.e the whacking grape flood i mean he didn't cause all the flood obviously even robs not in charge of the bloody rain but you know by blocking up robs even enough though anyway yeah by deliberately blocking the the culvert he would protect his bit but cause havoc further down because it would overspill is that your stomach rumbling no not at all well it was i heard it you wait two years and back you had something else wrong but weren't my term uh i don't know if that's well that was clear but i'm still puzzled as to what okay so there was a certain amount of precipitation before the flood yeah and he thought too much of getting into my cubicles yeah so he blocked it already no he he knew that his cubicles would be at risk if if the culvert overspilled so he blocked it completely so none of the water could get into that side of the channel so he blocked it so the water would be diverted and go down instead all right so uh you know what we need we need an agricultural consultant correspondent we need our very own agriculture who's that farmer what the way is that farmer yeah but he does chickens nik tobin he does chickens though he might know about trumpets nik yeah tell us about culverts you'll be a culvert correspondent hmm we need one of those yeah all right smashing so now we've got all that cleared up um why don't we crack on with uh kirsty dingle now kirsty well done first-time calorina and she's also brought some of our merch ooh thank you kirsty hello it's tingling dangle here i'm a first-time calorina I just want you to see how much i've been enjoying this piece i'm just like an artist of robin hillin and alpha and she looks at this i think she goes it's both on and there's obviously a second-for-year calling there i think absolutely shula is definitely trying to find or if it's a self-help so that she can say that alpha isn't interested in her anymore and it lets her give her free range of an off with whoever she wants having said that i think shula is the most enormous pain in the arse but alpha could be making it a little bit more of an effort to you know to serve and pay her some attention and with her new dresses and things even if she is terribly dull it's been lovely hearing Nick again um a degree if you can have some more of her in the next few weeks and obviously if you could comment for an interview that would be very nice i presume that we will with the the upcoming burden um and particularly if if willing that is as being based on i have to say i i think that's ridiculous and i i don't know what college is thinking i mean i know that she wants to keep her family together everything but everything is highly unreasonable to not really want your best man to reflect with the birds i don't know that maybe normal behavior of it so hopefully you'll get able to sit down like that and anyway that was all um keep up the good work i love the podcast and that's all cute now she says that you have nailed uh the shula and allister thing she says you is a very perceptive and you're a bit of a relationship guru because you understand these things she says some other stuff as well but um so why don't you just bask in that kind of glory and and um keep ask keep ask keep ask thank you very much kirsty um yes i find shula very irritating so i think that you tend to uh sort of um go further into people's motives when you're irritated by them than when you like them uh but yes i feel quite sorry for allister i really do at the minute actually i'm sure something will come out that he's you know rogering someone else or he's you know betting on flies crawling down windows or something like that but um i do feel sorry for him because it does feel as if he is being absolutely set up to fail yeah i know that's really really unpleasant situation to be in and bewildering as well she also said it's totally unreasonable to think that ed would want will to be best man i know i'm so angry with joe actually i just think that's so tackless for a start what about emma i mean as with a spoon said she's not going to want to turn around and see a will it will glare in at her the last time she was in that place in that position she was marrying someone who's then going to be standing there as the but it's just ludicrous and joe's an idiot i mean i know he has this lovely fantasy of all the boys getting on and all your mother would like it and everything but she'd only like it if there's not a massive brawl in the church which there probably will be it's not fair it's ed and emma's wedding it's not it's not you can't use someone else's occasion to you know to sort of heal the family is outside of that it's because they're going to look back on that and if anything negative happens that is what they'll remember and you can't expect will to behave like anything other than a dick because he is a dick so you know he's not going to behave himself is he i thought you said you told me that will's name's richard well i thought will's name was william you know i mean though it's just not hey i'm ryan riddles at mid mobile we like to do the opposite of what big wireless does they charge you a lot we charge you a little so naturally when they announce they'd be raising their prices due to inflation we decided to deflate our prices due to not hating you that's right we're cutting the price of mint unlimited from 30 dollars a month to just 15 dollars a month give it a try at mint mobile dot com slash switch 45 dollars up from payment equivalent to 15 dollars per month new customers on first three month plan only taxes and fees extra speeds lower above 40 gigabyte c details to remind you that 60 percent of sales on amazon come from independent sellers farmer bob of prince and popcorn howdy we'll read 60 percent of this ad fire away bob small business owners like myself are growing their businesses faster on amazon by getting help with things like shipping shop small business on amazon especially prince to popcorn amazon every day better it took a lifetime to find the person you want to marry finding the perfect engagement ring is a lot easier at blunile.com you can find or design the ring you've always dreamed of with help from blunile's jewelry experts who are on hand 24/7 to answer questions and the ease and convenience of shopping online for a limited time get 50 dollars off your purchase of 500 dollars or more with code listen at blunile.com that's 50 dollars off with code listen at blunile.com it is all very peculiar very peculiar um right so um it was next Lucy uh dusty substances call me dusty hello it's dusty substance here the wrong sort of listener um i haven't forgotten all about you life's just been a bit chaotic uh so i've been a bit out of the loop but i wanted to say how much i just enjoyed the made bank holiday uh episode absolutely perfect my wonderful wonderful Kenton being awesomely crabby with day and for one it's Jill being sympathetic which is not like Jill with Kenton really he usually gets a bit of a short straw with everybody uh Lindybox oh the door Lindybox and she realizes that all the best people don't like a dress salmon and i think she's better off doing the other uh was it baked real something that sounds much nicer and there was lots of references to the Maypole and i really hate it in the years when we don't get any of those um the most glorious of all was the button family having wonderful revenge on Mia who's who's probably only about three why has she been queen of the may i thought queens of the may were teenagers uh maybe i've just seen the wrong black and white footage but anyway well done buttons uh getting that crown into the hedgerow was a master stroke i really thought Shuler was going to fall in the pond when she was raking about that that was a missed opportunity but never mind otherwise it was just wonderful it does set the bar rather high for the next bank holiday which is something like three weeks time was nailed four weeks time but i'm hoping for the best you never know so uh thank you to uh Kerry Davis for a cracking episode and love to everyone at something done i've missed you and i'm glad to be back bye um she was she very much enjoyed the fate with the button girls lobbing the crown into the hedgerow um and having temper tantrums because they weren't allowed to be queen of the may yes i thought queens of the may were teenagers too because it is a festival about uh fertility and spring and ripening and basically it's a big festival of puberty um so yes having a toddler as queen of the may is a little bit odd i agree uh yes that's it really hmm i wouldn't let the button could you think the button girls are ever going to speak cool no they're coming maybe when the show has its hundredth anniversary they're not trot along which who then would be a dame who which young as Serena and Venus Williams that's the button girls wouldn't that be genius someone suggested you be on it did you hear yesterday on the twitters i like red on the twitters yes sorry uh yeah because i said this it you know it would be your reward because the podcast takes so much effort you ought to actually be on it i think that's very good well i think we might but our bridges would be the powers that be and also also you'd have to spend the whole time going i is black otherwise nobody would know which would because she said you know it's about time we had somebody somebody uh black on there somebody of color apart from usher i'm not going to be a token sorry put me in a little box i'm a weight chose token i am hello dad i'm stomach sugar bear here calling from the wilds of wiltshire got a bit of a toothache at the moment and the pain killers i've got are a little bit trippy so if i start singing pink Floyd songs or telling everyone that i love them just go with it um so the archers been playing a little bit of fantasy plotline in my head um this week inspired by the general election and by the way didn't like the result of that one little bit boo his um but could you imagine i think there's a good script line in they're becoming a vacancy at borsettshire council and david stands because he wants to kind of you know influence the road coming and everything um but i bet it's standard ukip because i don't about ub smacks the ukip you know i just you can just tell can't you um but i think an interesting plotline would be what if linda snails stood as an opponent you know stood against them um a rival campaign i mean linda would win obviously i mean it goes without saying but it'd be like the casual vacancy but without you know the misery and all that so you know i think these plotlines could be good you know is i think this is you know whatever but then again it could just be the painkillers all right then i'm going back to well trying to get rid of me toothache all right and bye what's up with his teeth um his teeth are hurting him so he's taking lots of drugs ah and that's making him delirious so he's starting to fantasize um and i couldn't quite get a sense out of his fantasies um and he talks about some stuff but generally he likes things good as long as he's in a drug-fueled haze and he's happy that's all that can ask and it certainly adds a an added element of surrealism to the archers i think if they're going to introduce two characters that have brothers and indistinguishable and called them the fair brothers then you know you'd probably need pharmacy drugs to cope with it i would imagine i don't know that there were pharmacy drugs ah probably like those kind of ketamine or something for another drugs that's a horse tranquilizer isn't it ketamine hmm yes oh and it was Emily Thomas Emily Thomas who said that i should uh have a chamere on the archers i like Emily yeah Emily would you like to be one at one of the wonder women i'm talking about the wonder women for quite some time no yes i'm sure she would i'm answering for her she's nodding i can see oh yeah cool um who else we got loose that's it good heavens i know whoo you know what it's because we only got the last episode up another one shut up like buses you wait for ages then three all come along at once all right then so um it's that time of the show where i say why don't we take five and then i which run about the fact that it's never five minutes and i i normally say it's something like it's 180 seconds but it's not not even that it's much shorter i reckon it's about 120 seconds so why don't we take 120 seconds camp coffee is on the boil uh what you can do the 120 seconds Lucy i'm going to finish the tea okay cool is it kind of like tepid yeah yeah don't like tepid tea no i don't even like hot tea don't you no no i used to really love tea as a kid and uh have it with like with two proper proper teaspoons of sugar so it's properly sweet proper West Indian style right but as i've got older i just like you know the sugar the amount of sugar i had was like less in it and then i just went off the thing my friend in Manchester she was weaned on tea Irish family in Manchester and she used to sit on the back of her mum's bike and drink tea out she can remember she when she was like two sitting on the back of her mum's bike clinging on for dear life drinking tea out of a bottle baby bottle wow isn't that amazing you'd never ever do that now probably didn't do any harm but she still has tea out of a baby bottle no like i call it baby tea it's like milk that's had a tea bag waved somewhere near it and i think there's something you know it's just uh it's how she can't she can't ever have it any different now because that's what she was you know weaned on very odd very odd indeed we used to have uh kind of like uh that when that was it sterilized milk you know it's terrible horrible that's disgusting and then almost blue oh horrible and then my grandma and grandpa used to have that condensed sweetened milk as well uh oh but i tell you as a kid you have that condensed sweetened milk on its own oh yeah it's like a licksier of the gods it's like especially when you have it with tin mandarin oranges good heavens when you have when you have fruit and when they're on a sunday when you've been out and there isn't a pudding and you say what's for pudding and your mum looks a bit panicky and rushes up into the kitchen that's why you end up with because it's sunday we always have a pudding on sunday don't wait and then you end up with mandarin oranges with with evaporated milk poured over the top but it all splits it separates because it's sort of curdles so you know little wobby bits of oh it's very strange but it's a taste of childhood that is you know what i want that's a really really really good thing to get people to call in with emergency desserts we used to have my mum was really good at emergency puddings we used to have jam performance what it's an omelette with jam basically and uh that's all wrong no it's lovely so it's sort of salty it was kind of salty with jam and it would have crispy bits crispy crunchy bits it's lovely what yeah oh god please someone else have had jam performance so that i don't know no one's ever had that i have had that and my sister has had that and i've almost had that other than your weird family i mean my weird family what else do we have uh baked banana if you put rum banana especially at the end of a barbecue if you wrap um banana up in tin foil and have rum in it sprinkled in it and brown sugar and you bake it it's yummy good heavens what was your emergency puddings uh one of those three cool ones out of a tin that your microwave in about a minute but no but do you remember do you know the ones i mean though yeah so it's written in tin and then before microwaves were invented because we can all remember that time unless you're like jen bei archibald and you can't remember time before a microwave but he had to boil it in a pan didn't you and that was like the longest 10 minutes we've ever been talking in history oh god and then the label would come up with tin you know he's getting hot and hot oh that's the most gorgeous thing oh then we have with some custard mmm steamed chicken pudding is my little boy's absolute favorite pudding and whenever i say to him what do you want for tea he says steamed chicken pudding for whatever you know breakfast anything is ever hopeful that somehow i'm gonna knock on for breakfast so you say to you also know breakfast what do you want for pudding no i don't i say what you want for breakfast and quite often just on the off chance it was a steamed chicken pudding in the hope that i'm suddenly going to produce one so that that's is what i love about this show because what who would have thought would have talked about you were going to plan to talk about emergency puddings at the start the show so please please please feel free to tweet email semaphore or whatever all facebook us with your emergency puddings and uh because i think that uh you probably help a lot of people out go on when i know when i was uh nanny i used to look after some children obviously because that was my job and um they wouldn't let me just be in nanny just luck around without looking after kids and uh it's as an emergency pudding or if they were very good they would say please please please can we have sweets in a cup and that was there that was their special treat and it would just became one of those ritual things if you gave them sweets loose if you gave them sweets in a bowl it wasn't the same it had and it had to be the plastic oh the plastic orange cups with the handles and and it was sweet in a cup and and they'd have like five sweets and they would behave as if i had cooked them you know the sort of a Michelin starred dinner amazing sweet in a cup was this when you were abroad uh yes where were you abroad was it Switzerland yes that is what i just that's figured that's there is waiting speak all these different languages because they speak everything in Switzerland don't they they do yeah so you kind of absorb it because everything on every packet every instruction for everything is written in French German and Italian so you kind of absorb it without meaning to and or without knowing you are it's a very good place to go actually to kind of get children introduced in language because you can compare everything really really quickly because you can see exactly how you would say that you know one sentence and then you figure out the other two so it's really helpful and then you watch Italian TV because German TV is so terrible and you watch all these terrible uh so so papras where people are crying and threatening each other with shotguns all the time and uh what happy days in French so that is the happy days and you'll be interested to hear that hey is exactly the same in French German and Italian and um what else did i do yeah and then you speak Swiss German which isn't like any language on earth so yeah you kind of you get it's a bit like a total immersion thing really remember a few weeks ago i talked about parks and recreation yes and you really really should watch it i know i see it's on my list it's just it's um it's done seven seasons and it's just the most glorious thing and uh but Henry Winkler the bonds oh really he was on it yeah yeah um i i'm on season five and half of season five and he's the father of two ridiculous characters uh who are just like bizarre and um he's trying to he's setting up a arrival shock to rent a swag and he's just absolutely pretty yeah it's the funds yeah it's very cool very cool anyway um so now we've spoken for about five minutes let's take those 120 seconds fancy getting your mouth around something warm something comforting you can really get a firm grip on why not buy a dumpty-dum mug from the shop at dumpty-dum.com goes down lovely and my name is Kate my name is Joe my name is Nicola my name is Suzanne Hacky me my name is mary parkinson i'm in hope house as a client um i have had addiction issues. um i hope i was um i was in the collegiate meeting this little heroine crayon addiction i'm here because it got really bad coming soon to iTunes 1001 conversations a new podcast from royfield brown. good day everyone millie bell here with our facebook ground up sarah holt in ambridge at it said oh gosh yes i'm sure Emma would love her ex-husband to be the best man at her wedding to his brother there was a lovely response from nick lucas on arches appreciation group from in reference to eddie and joe offering to sing at the wedding great consternation in the folk music world hmm in spite of extensive research can't seem to find the words to the ballchester cobbler or the fair maid eventually tom forest in arches appreciation said and let us guess this isn't the real tom forest i look forward to seeing you in action crumbs you can hear pit ovulating to which roger tilbury responded verily thine arches becomes a Shakespearean with the brothers fair toby or not toby that is the question uh tim porter in upstairs at the ball said a couple of comments in relation to the background music in thursday's episode during the rather obvious flirting being tween pick and toby the arctic monkeys classic i bet that you look good on the dance floor was playing definitely a case of the script writers giving us a glimpse at the commonality of thought between the love struck duo dance floor certainly a metaphor in this case a dance metaphor however next up was acd sees i way to hell hopefully not assign us to where this impending relationship is headed what really interests that i found that fairly interesting but also interested uh me was that carrie davis responded and was said that he was glad that we noticed so i have often wondered because the music always seems very well placed and i i now think that the script writers are even smarter than i originally thought i noticed that there's also a bit of a push now to try to somehow get uh the script writers to wangle in rush so uh we'll see if that happens and then we'll know that we have the ear of the script writers i actually did have to make a bit of reference because i was expecting someone to say this on one of the uh facebook sites and nobody did but i was really really surprised by a popular reference from joe grandi so i asked the question joe grandi referring to russell brand have i died and gone to heaven to which you know at arindale replied no no no no no no yes again i don't know why these things tickle me so much but they do we then asked what storyline do we predict for the fair brothers they just don't seem to be cut from the same and we had a few responses to that uh valerie suggested valerie bailis said perhaps lizzy will have a wild affair and then discover one of them is her long lost son who she conveniently forgot she had Freddie will shoot them both and then we will discover a hitously disfigured Nigel living in the attic who will take responsibility so that his son goes free jul will make a cup of tea in a castor hall while everyone else buries them under the patio and scruff will return to dig them up scruff will we never hear the end of scruff i think they need to either tidy this up or we just need to accept on facebook that is not coming back thank you miss bell uh loose yes why don't you hit us with some tweets of the last seven days okay uh mrs bentos said we were talking about how difficult it was to tell the fair brother brothers apart she said no it's easy rex is the rugby playing toff tobe is the rugby playing lecheries toff right okay thank you for that for clearing that up uh rose taylor on a similar theme suggested call them treks and make pastry um treks is what you used to make pastry boy in case you didn't know uh jane low i thought he's got a hired hand for that jane low said uh archer brothers are amateurs look to the grumpy boys for proper simmering resentment that's true that's very true yep um if we had any ham said this is why you shouldn't get married family turned blackmailers and suddenly your hated brother is your best man and two idiots are singing yes absolutely true um this is quite those of a sensitive disposition block your ears up now meld parker said i still think scruff is blocking the culvert oh meld and tweeter the week he was at this is his second time as tweeter the week actually he's very funny pina pint um who followed up joe and eddie's frankly appalling folk singing with followed by that boardy old favorite the ballad of widow party during the deputy events manager it's very good i didn't think this singing was bad i quite liked it no i i remember a very very old joke on some show in the 80s when they said uh the reason why folks on his put their fingers in there is when they sing is to stop people pouring poison into it um it's just i have a i have a horror of focusing i'm sure it was very good for what it was but it's it was what it was that was the problem there's a podcast uh called born yesterday by a guy called joey brunell and he's absolutely brilliant storyteller and the last podcast he's good put some that kind of infrequently and it's called kind of born yesterday because you it's always kind of like the kind of weird underbelly of kind of bits of history and stories so like there's the emperor of the emperor of america this guy used to wander around san francisco who called himself the emperor and the monarch of american and everybody in san francisco like he's burning back but the 1880s kind of loved him and of course he died of pauper and um kind of lovely little stories like that his last show was actually about c shanties all right and how they um kind of came about and they came about quite late on really got really popular in like the 1820s so about the 1880s before you got proper mechanized uh kind of ship travel he's like the he's going like the when the power of sail was kind of at its height because it's all about doing the rigging and rhythmically yeah pulling in uh the rigging etc and you're saying these shanties to do a thing in time and that's what it reminded me of listening to them singing those singing c shanties in effect but a lot of that is is agricultural folk songs were to do with the same thing what to do with chucking hay ricks up onto chucking veils up onto um uh hay ricks and uh picking fruit picking veg pulling up potatoes all that sort of thing uh was all had to be rhythmic because you all had to be going at the same time makes sense doesn't it yep absolutely makes sense the things that people learn from our chef colby's sea santies jam pop omelette that sounds all manner of wrong all manner of wrong but folks don't forget we need your emergency puddings and uh and that'd be very good for next week so please feel free to send us in any as well with considered yeah uh what do you think this is tesmat special oh you know what yes we were to take that tradition on and people send us cakes makers cakes that'd be bloody fantastic it would they won't do it though i don't know i've got i've got every faith in jan from can i'm gonna get jan mitchell don't let us down oh guess what lucy what on saturday i had to be in brighten taking in the sun and the sea and i had a little message because i i tweeted out that i knew i was in brighten and i had a little message from angelan eagle that she was there with Emma edwards so i met up with two domby domers um in a costa in church you're scaring brighten it was very lovely yeah and there's a little picture of us on the facebook but it's actually on my facebook but i'm going to put it on w dom's facebook and i will tweet it as well good we had a lovely time they're they're wonderful women and what they do they're their nurses yeah and they meet up with a group of other nurses once a month once every six weeks around the uk so um they were in brighten this time but they are planning to meet up in bermingham in september and they met somewhere else whenever else but as well as being um wondrous uh backbows in the NHS and of the health system uh they also take their goodness abroad and Emma he's going to be doing some voluntary work in kenya or kenya as you'd say and she does that every year and they kind of travel around the world and do volunteering work and they're just absolutely brilliant and i got a coffee board for me and everything and they packed me on the head and then after about now they said okay bad enough for you now we need to keep shopping so go away but i really but they're absolutely lovely and it was just really nice to bump it bumping into some arcters and domedum listeners it's cool yeah so thank you ladies i don't know that note i think we should wrap things up and hit everybody with some sharp news i'm my breath is baited good that's probably a drink in that tea first even more it goes to your breath um right shop nice folks yes this is a section where we tell you which domedidum has bought what vicky berry who is obviously a lillian fan because she's purchased not only a lillian t-shirt but also some splash of gin mugs now you can join up by buying some of our merch and heading over to domedidum.com forward slash shop so go there and buy some stuff now oof it's that time top of the shop news reviews I've said that the wrong way around you know what i meant now we've got two brand new fresh ones in the uk itunes store mr nickel whose favorite time of the week is domedidum time and deep space object who thinks we are eclectic thank you for your reviews people and remember we are now only 14 short of the big 200 so let's get us there and then i'll never mention this section ever again until i want to and then i'll mention it again all right so smashing uh now what an incentive that is Roy how many different kind of members clubs do we have Lucy uh well we have the the cabinet office don't we and we have the johns the order of the johns and we may well have the emergency pudding club i don't know you've got then you've got your posse yep pussy pussy well you can say that the wonder women mmm but it's more of no i don't know we've decentralized kind of leadership so it's not mine we've got a splinter group it's we've got the paramilitary wing of the wonder women but we've it's it's i think it's lovely that we have all these kind of yes in these schisms within uh the arch's listenership and i'm just worried about the the order of john archer i am worried about it because um every week we can't say call in if you're a john but i i find it hard to believe there's only four listeners called john or do you think there's others but they're shy exactly so we need those shy johns to come out come out in your closet and bask in your johnness and we will award you the order of you know just shy johns just makes me think of american television and prostitutes i'm not sure that's well yes so shy johns please come out of of your hiding place stop lurking come out into the full clever sunshine and take your order of john archer email into us tell us that you're a john prove it by having john in your email address somewhere and you'll be knighted john the fifth and john the first second third and fourth can all tell you how much their lives have changed since being bestowed with this postage just title no good listener we would like to thank you uh for not donating to us but for instead donating to the people of napaul because we didn't get any this week good no i don't think you still should be donating to don't i feel terrible saying that's earlier no don't just give it to them give it to them for another couple weeks and then um then maybe think about giving us some yeah all right uh now denatia do you patreon okay but if you wanted to you can also now you be made me do the bad bit so i don't like a grasping old cow you could also go into patreon.com search for john to dumb and you can donate two dollars a show which is about one pound 30 and this week barber wiseman is joining the mary band of patreon so thank you barbara thank you that's it remember remember remember you can also send us a voice message by the site uh because uh without it uh there's no calorinerus and we like calorinerus because they're great and uh they're the accolade of being a calorinerus so and it's uh the show of the calorinerus that's what don't you dumb is a calorinerus show so do you know we hand out honors more often than the conservative government just before election time don't we it's amazing how much money did uh yoke will be a donate to our election coffers i don't know mmm do you think well should he spot his way in to be exactly exactly exactly but i we've for two old lefties we've managed to go the whole show without talking about the election result yeah which is probably quite good though anyway so anyway you can also call us um on zero two zero three zero three one three one zero five from a phone a phone type thing which you can phone people on if you can't use our website which has a big red button but it says leave a message or something or another um and then you can like ping us an email by our site if you go on then hit contact us it contacts us and you can just like type stuff because people use that facility and it's quite good or you can tweet me on the twitters when i'm at royfield that's r o i for india f i e l d or me at lucy v freeman or the pair of us where we're at dumbly dumb so please please please keep those reviews coming because you want to be top of the podcast charts before ed asked klei parabens if he's made of honor where is klei for a bin now is he still in nick yeah i think so best place for him um it's a bit like nick cotton any yeah he just he just returns when the action needs to be pushed on a little bit yeah and he's just yeah horrid horrid horrid we've got this uh friend of us looks looks just like nick cotton really yeah yeah it gets stopped all the time yeah otherwise really poor bloke yeah no he gets stopped all the time people say you're that bloke from east end this is no i'm not this is who says this is just shakes his head or something i'm not no no we'll stand the street no no god oh god but he's supposed to have lost loads of weight now so and um he's doing some iron man thing where they you know they're running they ride in this world yeah yeah he's who nick cotton is all your friends no my friend his name is dick is it right yeah so i haven't seen him since he's supposed to have lost all this weight and people say oh god have you seen he's lost all this weight and he's really it's lost all that weight okay yeah he's just lost weight yeah skinny dick he's about to do some iron man thing so well done with that and i hope you do really well right so clean my throat and you know i'm gonna do what i only get half an hour's worth of more kip half an hour it's hardly worth it you'll just wake up being feeling all sleep hung over it's really weird no i'm going back to bed seven o'clock going back to bed uh because there's no need for me to be up this early kenny's family health care benefits kicked in the day he started his hourly job at amazon with two kids he was a big fan of that then he took advantage of amazon's on the job skills training program that helped him launch a new career in software development kenny liked that too that led to a bigger paycheck so he was able to get his youngest saane drum roll please drum set next up drum lessons learn more at about amazon.com amazon every day better forging ahead together drives colorado's pioneering spirit at chevron we donate funding and volunteer thousands of hours in support of the communities we call home we also employ our neighbors to deliver the energy needed as the state's largest oil and natural gas producer all to help improve lives in our shared backyard that's energy in progress visit colorado.chefron.com

Dum Tee Dum Episode 57 – Its Tuesday its Dumteedum time

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The post Dum Tee Dum Episode 57 – Its Tuesday, its Dumteedum time appeared first on DumTeeDum.