- That's what not, that's a deer? - That's severe. - Severe, okay. ♪ I'm a deer painted for the road over ♪ - Okay, it's not a deer deer. - Welcome to Mind Matters with Dr. J. A. Jones. Dr. Jones is the head pastor of the Faith Community Church of God in Orange Park, Florida. Relationships, finances, our spiritual life, whatever it is, our problems start with end, in our minds. Dr. Jones explores mental wellness through the application of God's word in our lives. It's just what the doctor ordered. Let's join him now and dig into Mind Matters because your mind matters to God. - Welcome to Mind Matters, the show where we're going to explore the principles that help you unlock your potential for success and fulfillment in every area of your life. Today we're gonna talk about the dynamics of relationships, whether it's friendships, work relationships, marriage, or personal growth. Our show today is about navigating relationships with grace, overcoming challenges. And I ensure you today that how we interact with one another, it's gonna be positive, productive, and enriching. I have a special guest with me today. Cindy, you wanna share anything? - Good morning, Dr. Jones, how are you? - Good day to you. - It may be morning to some, evening to others. It may be whatever time of the day they're, yeah, the time's on wherever they're gonna be and however they're gonna be listening to it. Some people I've learned driving in their car and they're listening to the radio show. Some people are in their homes, some people are on their phone. So I'm thankful for you audience, wherever you are, and however you're listening to the show today, it's gonna be exciting. I'm always grateful to have Cindy, my wife, of 46 years together. She's amazing, she's incredible, she's insightful. She's very intelligent, and most of all, she's very beautiful. And I thank God for her, for her being with me on Mind Matters with myself, Dr. Jones and Cindy Jones. So let's get into the show today. But you know what, this week is also Fourth of July, coming up. - Yes. - No, thank God for Fourth of July. - Thank God for freedom. - Freedom, right, right. - Yeah, many of that doesn't have that freedom. They are controlled by their government, and so, and they don't have a voice. But thank God for America. - Oh, absolutely, absolutely. - Of America, yes. - It's a big deal, Fourth of July, you know, barbecue, you know, ribs, chicken, and hot dogs, hamburgers, and, you know, baseball games and whatever else is gonna happen in our society, at least in the United States of America. And wherever you're listening to this, I thank God for freedom, we do. - Yeah. - You know, Jesus said, when you know the truth, the truth will make you free. - Correct. - So we are free people mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and in it, every way. Thank God for that. All right, let's get into the show today. We're gonna talk about navigating relationships, but it's gonna be done with grace. God's favor, God's approval. - Yes. - And God will help us to overcome challenges in every relationship, because we're all gonna have challenges, especially in relationships. - Yes, and it's important to remember, not only do we receive God's grace, but we gotta give grace to others. - Absolutely. - Yes. - In relationships. - Yeah, you know, grace helps you to get through those challenges. - Yes, absolutely. - So the first thing we wanna talk about don't let your problems override God's promises. And that's so important because it emphasizes the importance of maintaining faith in God's promises, even in the face of challenges and adversity. Because we're all gonna have some challenges. We're all gonna face adversity. And some of us have already dealt with adversity growing up. I call it adverse childhood experiences. - Right. - They call it ACEs. - Yes. - Adversity, trauma, abuse, neglect, household dysfunction. And we're learning how to function as adults today, based on dysfunction from the past. So relationships can be an incredible challenge, but we can overcome. - Yes, we can, 'cause we are overcomers. And in order to overcome, you got to extend some grace and kind of show some empathy. You know, trying to relate and understand what someone else has gone through. And a lot of times we don't know until we get into challenges. I ain't gonna call 'em problems. I'm gonna say challenges. - Okay, I like that, challenges arise. And we find out how a person may react or respond and it's based on what they've already been through. - So reaction is based on emotion. A response is based on knowledge or intelligence. - You're right. - We have the right information to say something. - Yeah, you need to pause before we react. - Okay. - And see where something is coming from. - Right. - And try to get an understanding. - Absolutely. Well, you know what the Bible said in Jeremiah 29-11, he says, "For I know the plans or the thoughts that I think toward you says to the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil to give you a future and a hope." - Yes. - And that's so important as we understand God's promises that we can get through every challenge in our life, relationships, whether it's work relationships, home relationships, or relationship with your friends or neighbors or whoever you come across on the highway, you know? So that's a powerful principle. And here's another principle in Isaiah 26 and three. You know what that says? - Says you will keep in perfect peace whose minds are steadfast because they trust in you. It's important to fall back on God's promises, his word and think about him and what he said so you can have peace and not get caught up into the situation. - Oh, absolutely. I love this scripture now, it's one of my favorite, probably one of my top 10 because it's a promise. He will keep us in perfect peace. - Yes. - Wow, that's incredible, right? When we keep our mind stayed on him and the reason he would keep us, he would keep us no matter what, you know, but we have to do our part in life, right? Because we can overcome every challenge and every problem because there's always a solution to every problem. There's always an answer to every question. - So how do we get that peace? When it says who keeps their mind stayed on him? When you think about him, you want to talk to him. - Okay, okay. - You know, just like your boot, you know, when you think about somebody, you want to talk to them. - Right. - You know, you want to be around them. And so the same thing, God will keep us in perfect peace when our minds are stayed on him. We ask him, we talk to him. Lord, what should I do? - Okay. - You know. - What should I do in this relationship? - Yeah. - What should I do in this situation? - The situation. - Yeah. - Most of the time the situation brings about an interaction with somebody. - Yeah. - Right? Even if we're asking that question to God when we're by ourselves is based on a scenario, is based on a challenge or is based on an experience that we're facing or have faced. - Yeah. - So what should we do? - So in the midst of a conversation, you may not say, Lord, what should I do? - Okay. - Out loud. - Sure. - But you can say that in your mind. - Right. - Because God knows our thoughts are far off. - Yes. Before we think of them. - Yeah. And so we can ask him in our minds. Lord, what should I do? Or how should I handle this situation? 'Cause you can feel those emotions arising. - Oh, absolutely. You know, because we have to trust him. He said he would keep us in perfect peace. What he means, whenever it talks about that, he will guard our minds. He will protect us. When it says he would keep us in perfect peace, who's mind is stayed on him because we trust in him. For example, when situations arise, I think me and you were talking early about a couple we know, you know, in our church or a couple in our community. And this particular wife, she was cleaning the house and she knocked down a TV. The TV fell over. It was a 65 inch television. I'm pretty sure that cost a penny, right? But it was her husband's television. He loves to watch it, but he was not at home at that time. And she's like, oh my goodness, what am I'm going to do? So she got on the phone and called him and told him what happened. - Yes. Yes. - And his response, he didn't yell. - He did not yell. - He didn't give choice words. - Right. - And so that calls peace in the house because he didn't react, he responded. - Sure, sure. I mean, that costs some money. I mean, I can imagine what five, six hundred dollars depends on when it was bought, whether it was a smart TV could be at $800. I know TVs don't normally cause as much as it's used to, but still that means they have to replace it at some point, right? - Yeah, and my other stay's coming up. So maybe he was thinking about, oh, I get to get a bigger TV. I don't know. Maybe he would. Maybe he would. But the point is this, the wife had peace. - Yes. - Because she thought he was going to yell, scream, get emotional about it, but he was calm, cool and collected. And she was at peace because she said, "Lord, I thank you for peace in my house." - Yes. - And that's what we all want, Cindy. - Yes. - We all want it in relationships. It could be at work. It could be something somebody broke at work. And that same experience could come about. So I think why people have peace, especially in a marriage, because God is in the middle, right? And God is at the forefront and God is first. And that helps no matter what problems arise or what situation may come to pass, when you do the right thing, she could have hit it. She could have blamed somebody else. She could have said it fell on her own, on his own, but she called, made the phone call to her husband and he responded instead of reacted emotionally. - Yes, it makes a difference. - Yes, but that talks about maturity. - Yeah. - It speaks about honesty from the wife's perspective to go ahead and address it. - Yeah. - And guess what? I'm pretty sure they'll get a TV sooner later. And I thought today the first promises that we're talking about, we're talking about overcoming problems and trusting God promises. This is a powerful promise. God would keep you, sir, ma'am, wife, mother, husband, whoever you are and whatever relationship you're in, I'm glad you're tuning in to my matters with myself and Cindy. I want you to know you can be in perfect peace. - Right. - That peace is almost like it blows your mind. - Mm-hmm. - You know, it doesn't make sense because God's peace doesn't make sense. When He gives us that peace. - Exactly. - Especially between two people. - Yeah, the word talks about the peace of God. - Right. - You know, and you have the peace of God. It surpasses all understanding. - Right. - Like you just said, it doesn't make sense. - No, not in the logical mind. Oh, rational mind, it doesn't. - But it's wonderful. - It is. Now here's another principle. Here's another promise. It is important for us to understand it. I think as John chapter 16 verse 33, I have told you these things so that in me, you may have peace. - Mm-hmm. - In this world, you will have trouble. - Oh, without a doubt. - But it goes on to say, "But take heart, I have overcome the world." Wow, isn't that a powerful promise? - Yes, it is. Yes, it is. - Jesus saying, "In Him, we will have peace." But in the world, right, in this age that we live again, trouble is gonna happen. Trouble is gonna happen. I love when Job said, I think Job chapter 14 verse one, it says, "Man that is born of a woman "is of a few days and full of trouble "because trouble is gonna happen in our society. "But we can have peace." Say that again? - I said, "He was reading my mind. "I was thinking about that same scripture. "In a few days, you're gonna have trouble." - Absolutely. No, absolutely. It won't take long for trouble to come and knock, knock, knock, knock at your door, right? Knock at the door of your heart, the door of your mind, and it's gonna happen. It's part of life. - Yes. - It's part of life, L-I-F-E. One day we're gonna do a show on Eat Life. That's not for the day, but we're gonna talk about that later. Eat Life. I want you, my audience to know you can eat life, instead of allowing life to eat you, to chew you up and spit you out. No, we're gonna put a brand new show about how you can eat life versus life eating you. And I thank God for that. So today is about promises, right? - Promises. - I thank God for His promises in the midst of every problem. We can be assured that God would keep us and help us. - Dr. Jones is the pastor of Faith Community Church of God in Orange Park, reaching a hurting world with the love of Jesus. We thank you for listening to Mind Matters, and we encourage you to show support for the many community outreach ministries that Dr. Jones and Faith Community Church tend to. You can give at Faith Community's website, faithccop.org, or just text money sign and the amount you want to give to 833-435-8022. That's 833-435-8022. We are blessed to be a blessing. Now, let's get back to the program. - Don't let your feelings supersede your faith. That's what, you know, don't let your problems override God's promises. Don't let your feelings get in the way of your faith. - Absolutely. - Psalms 37, verses 23-24 says, "The Lord makes firm the steps of the one who delights in him, though he may stumble he will not fall for the Lord upholds him with his hands." - Yes. - "He's got us." - Yes. - "He's holding us." Amen? - Hey, tell him, God got you. - God got you. - God got you, sir. - Yeah. - God got you. I love that when you said he got us. - He said that. - And I want my audience to know God got you. He got you back. Know that today. - You gotta believe that. That's the point of your faith is believing that he has you no matter what comes our way. - Yes. - No matter what situation we may face or challenges, however you wanna look at it. - Right. - He has you. - Right. - And he will make firm your steps when you delight in him. - Yes. - When you delight, the delight means when you're teachable. - Okay. - When you're moldable. - Okay. - But when you just insist on trying to help things your way, then that's a whole different story. - Well, we have the humble ourselves because Matthew chapter 11, I think the verse 28 says, "Come to me, all you who are weary and heavy laden." And he said, "I would give you rest." - Correct. - Then he said, "Take my yoke upon you and learn from me for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your soul." - Yes. - So today's show is about understanding God's promises. So we can overcome the problems or challenges that we all face and we will find a space of rest. - Yes. - A place of rest within our soul. - Yes. - And that's why we talked about that couple when the TV fell and the wife said, "Thank God I got peace in my house." - Yes, yes. And so when we can rest on God's promises and you know, and not get caught up into the feelings and we're, you know, we live in this body. - Yes. - And it's so easy to get caught up on how we feel. - Sure. - And not realize or forget about the fact that those feelings are just temporary and they're based on what we're thinking. - Sure. Because when we prioritize God's promises over our problems and trust in his faithfulness, we position ourselves for success and fulfillment and actually having great fulfillment according to his purpose for our lives. - Yes. - Let's talk about the second point. The first point was don't let your problems or your challenges override God's promises. The second point as relates to navigating relationships with grace because we can overcome challenges. Thank you for tuning in to Mind Matters with myself and Cindy, the second point is this. Life would give you what you fight for. My goodness. I hope we have time to deal with this point because this point challenges us to examine our approach to life. Are we settling for mediocrity or are we actively pursuing excellence? I love the description, Proverbs, chapter 12. I believe it's verse four it says, "An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, "but she who causes shame is like the rottenness "in his bones." - Ooh. - That's severe. - That's what not? That's a deer? - That's severe. - Severe, okay. ♪ I'll be ♪ ♪ And the deer painted for the road ♪ - Okay, it's not a deer, deer. But it's severe, the bee, you know, she that causes shame can be rottenness. It's like rottenness in his bones. Yeah, in his bones, that's deep. So that runs deep. - That's strong language. - Yeah, it runs, but I love the Bible 'cause it's relevant and it's truthful and it gets to the core. - Yeah. - And we need for the word to get to the core to who we really are. - Wow. - I'm so glad that you, you know, are amazing women that, you know, your life is about excellence instead of mediocrity. - No, thank you. - But the Bible said an excellent wife is the crown of her husband. So excellence comes through fighting and standing on God's word and his promises and changing a life of mediocrity to excellence. You know, and that's so important because when I say life give you what you fight for, this means a person settles for, when a person settles for no personal growth, no goals, they settle for laziness, they settle for a lack of purpose and direction and they live by their feelings. They are easily angered and doesn't direct their mind toward positive and meaningful pursuits. They're settling for life instead of fighting because you gotta fight because life would give you what you fight for. If you fight for nothing, life would give you nothing because this is an attitude of mediocrity that hinders progress in every relationship whether it's a friendship, a marriage, financial matters, spiritual matters and being in good health because we get what we fight for. Life doesn't give us nothing. We gotta fight for it. - So in other words, have some standards. - Yeah, you gotta have standards, absolutely. - So if you don't have any standards, you'll settle for anything. - You'll settle for anything. You'll settle for whatever way to win blows you. Or how you feel. - Right, so you're just living off a whim. - Absolutely. The Bible says the hand of the diligent will rule but the lazy man will be put to force labor. My goodness, I love that. I think that's Proverbs, you have to 12, verse 24. What that means is his future will be blink depressing, miserable. If you fight for laziness, you get it. If you fight for miserable marriage, you're gonna get it. If you fight for low self-worth, you're gonna get it. If you fight for worry, uncertainty, anxiety, you are going to get it. - So in other words, if you don't fight, that's what you're gonna get. - Okay. - You fighting without fighting. - Okay, but also the opposite is true. If you fight to be diligent, you get it. If you fight to be excellence, you get it. If you fight for spiritual growth, you have to because the hands of the diligent will rule. You gotta be diligent in life because life is not gonna give you nothing. You gotta fight for it. The Bible's to the kingdom of God suffer violence and the violent take it by force. My point is this, fight, stand, do the right thing. Get going because if you fight for personal growth, you would grow. If you fight and take responsibility for your actions as a man, as a woman, you're gonna get it. You're gonna get respect. You're gonna grow in grace and knowledge of Jesus Christ. You're gonna, if you fight for confidence, you're gonna be confident. It's be confident. If you fight for faith, you're gonna keep your faith, your self-worth because life, as somebody said, is not fair, right? But it's part of living. And we can overcome every obstacle and every scenario if we fight for it. The Bible's to have, fight the good fight of faith. That's what the Scriptures is. Fight the good fight of faith. So life is a fight, but guess what, Cindy? It's a fight we win. - Yeah. - It's a fight that we can overcome. As the Scriptures said, having done all the stand, stand. - Okay. - So if it is, when we say fight, a lot of times, well, I guess you just picture in your mind a comment against adversity physically. - Okay, okay. - When you think about fight, you're talking about physical fight. Well, at least that's what comes to my mind. - Okay. That's your part. Go ahead. But just as you stand here, you gotta fight. You gotta take a stand. - Okay. - For what you want to happen in your life. - Yes. - It's not just gonna come to you. - Right. - You know, and so you gotta put some action behind your faith. People say, oh, I believe this and I believe that, but they don't do. - Right, they're giving out the wrong energy. Some things you don't need to be quiet about. Some things you need to be verbal about. You need to speak it and you need to do it like what you're saying. And I think that's so important because life would give you what you fight for because God is a God of reward. God rewards the diligent. - Yeah. What you stand for him. - Oh, what you stand for. - What you're receiving. What you put up with and what you won't put up with. They put it that way. - Well, the Bible says in Proverbs chapter 12, verse one, I believe, "Whoever loves instruction loves knowledge, "but he who hates correction is stupid." Now you can look it up yourself. That's what it said. (laughs) That's what it says. So fight for truth. Stand on right. - Yes. - Do the right thing when nobody else is looking. - I am okay. - Fight, you know. That's so important, right? - You will be rewarded. - Absolutely, absolutely. - You will reap what you sow. - Uh-huh. Oh, yes, absolutely. So, I remember being in a sack race. I think mean you did a sack race one time. - Oh, Lord, yeah. - But just picture yourself in a potato sack race. I'mma just say that. Do you aim for first place? Or are you just happy hopping around in life? (laughs) No, you can't be just happy hopping around, right? You gotta strive for the gold medal in life. You gotta strive for the best. In other words, do your best, be your best. - Finish. - Become your best. Fight for the best part of your life because I've learned this and the people make bad decisions. I've been there and done that, right? - Oh, yes. - I made bad decisions in my relationship. I made bad decisions with my finances. I made bad decisions in my health and how I used to eat, but I've changed that. - Part of growing. - That's part of growing. - Matureing, I should say. - Right. But now I'm making better decisions. So I went from bad to better because I gained the right knowledge to make better decisions. - Right. - And the best place to go for right knowledge is the Bible. - Yes. - That's basic instructions before leaving Earth. The Bible is nothing but the truth, so help me God. (laughs) - Amen. - It is. So once you get the truth from what God has said, because God created us in His image and likeness. - Yes. - God knows where we need to go and guess what, He knows how to take us there. - Right. - I'll take you there, don't know, don't know. (laughs) I don't know where they came from, but-- - Yeah, I don't need it. - But God knows how to take us there. So I went from bad decisions to better decisions. Now I'm gonna get to the place called best. The best decision is where we all should try to strive for in every area of our lives. And that's so important. - Yes, and so to be better, like you said, you have to get the knowledge to want to be better. Not just settle for, okay, this is how life is. And so I'm just gonna try to get over, get over, get by, get by, get around, and you find yourself making poor decisions because you're trying to con people-- - Yes. - And looking out for yourself, that's a selfish-- - Right. - Sight. - Oh, absolutely. That means you're fighting for selfishness instead of being self-less. - Right, but if you get the right knowledge-- - Yes. - You'll learn how to be better. - Oh, absolutely. - B. - B. - B. - Absolutely. We gotta be better in every area in there. And I totally is on that bandwagon because my goal is to become the best person that I can become as a child of God. I wanna develop myself by starting with my mind 'cause the battle is in the mind. I'm so glad that you're with us today on Mind Matters. If you just tuned in or if you have been tuning in, call somebody, text somebody, to listen to this show Mind Matters with Dr. J. A. Jones. And I have my wife, Cindy Jones, with me today. And believe me, by choosing to fight for excellence and embracing God's promise of abundant life, we unlock our full potential and step into the destiny that God has prepared for us. God has more for you. We had four points we wanted to cover today, but come back next week because we're gonna talk about the other two points as relates to navigating relationships with grace. And you can overcome challenges. So I look forward to you being with us next week on Mind Matters with myself, Dr. Jones and Cindy Jones. Tune in, we'll see you next week. - Thanks for tuning into another episode of Mind Matters with Dr. J. A. Jones. Be sure to tune in next Sunday at 5 p.m. right here on Praise 107.9. We're more insightful discussion about how God's word can get our minds right. You can also hear Dr. Jones preach in person Sundays at 11 a.m. at Faith Community Church of God at 1268 Gainell Avenue in Orange Park, Florida, 32073. Thanks again for listening. Stay mindful and keep striving for improvement because your mind matters to God. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music)
