Captain Rabbit and his stalwart crew once again thwart a Mimic invasion plan, just in time for Haymas!
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The Mutual Audio Network
Star Rabbit Tracks Christmas Special: “Paws Across The Galaxy”(081024)
(upbeat music) This episode is brought to you by Experian. Are you paying for subscriptions you don't use, but can't find the time or energy to cancel them? Experian could cancel unwanted subscriptions for you, saving you an average of $270 per year, and plenty of time. Download the Experian app. Results will vary, not all subscriptions are eligible. Savings are not guaranteed. Paid membership with connected payment account required. It's the weekend. So relax and listen to some stories the whole family can enjoy. That's right, it's the Saturday Story Circle, here on the Mutual Audio Network. - The following audio drama is rated G for general audience. - It's Hamus Eve on Radio Free Overbite, and we want to take the time to send out Hamus wishes to those within Hair Command who won't see their loved ones at this special time of year. Please join us after these short messages as we send pause around the galaxy at Hamus time. (upbeat music) These are the adventures of the Starship Jackalope. Our continuing mission to explore new garden patches on different worlds to seek out larger and juicier carrots. To boldly go where no rabbit has gone before. Star rabbit tracks. Featuring the voice talents of Alex Gilmore as Captain Peter Rabbit. Bobby Owens as Lieutenant Tanya Ears. David McIver as Lieutenant Taddy McZacker. Michael Liebman as Dr. Harvey Hopper Smith. And Tom Chalker as Commander Thumper. (upbeat music) - Captain's Log. The crew of the Jackalope has been chosen by High Admiral Jeff O'Truck to take part in a radio broadcast on Hamus Day. It is an honor and a privilege to be asked. So of course, we had to accept. - This is all very exciting. My Aunt Gertrude is gathering everybody around the radio tonight to us and in. - Is it a tradition? - No, a Panasonic. - Okay, gather around the microphone everyone. The producer would like to speak to us all. - I used to do a bit of acting back in the Academy. I once auditioned for the role of a doctor in General Infirmary. - I love General Infirmary. What happened? - I didn't get a call back. Apparently I didn't make a convincing doctor. - Oh, that does surprise me. - Is everybody here? We have a very tight schedule to work too. - I believe everyone is here. - Hang on, where's Commander Thumper? - I haven't seen him for a while, Captain. - Maybe he got lost somewhere. - He'll be doing something spiritual and rewarding, like volunteering at the human shelter. - My apologies, Captain. I was doing some last minute Hamus shopping. - There is a Purple Thursday event on at the electronic store and my stepfather was asking for a new television set. - We don't have time to get into that, Commander. Take your position. - I didn't realize it was Purple Thursday. - My Aunt Gertrude wanted one of those e-phones that everybody has these days. - E-phones are so last year. You want to get the new robot phones. There's nothing they can't do. I can program my phone to feed my pet slug at any time of the day while I'm away on active duty. - That's pretty clever. - Look at this. It will even give me options on what to feed him to enhance growth and for more healthy slime production. - Dr. Hobber, please turn off your phone and concentrate on the reason that we are here. - This is a great honor and we must remember that. - Sorry, Captain. - Anyway, everyone knows Blueberry is the future. - Can we please get on with the rehearsal? Time is getting away from us. - Sorry. Yes, gather around the microphone, everyone. - As part of the pause around the galaxy broadcast, I've written a special broadcast piece about air command. Do you all have a copy of the script? - Yes, I think so. - I don't have one, Captain. - I told you to print out five copies, one each. - Your message only said to print four off, Captain. - I distinctly remember telling you to print off five. One for each member of a bridge crew. - Here you go, Daddy. Share mine. - Thanks, Commander. - I am going to be sitting in that soundproof booth just over there by the window. I will converse with you via the radio. Is that okay? - Yes, that seems fine to us. - What a strange little rabbit. - Probably comes with sitting in a chair in the middle of a room all day. Don't you agree, Captain? - I don't know what you're insinuating, Doctor. - Hello, I hope you can all hear me. Can someone please do a sound check for me? Maybe recite a nursery rhyme into the mic so I can test the sound levels. - Of course we can. Go ahead, Commander. - Me, sir? - You must know some nursery rhymes from when you were growing up in the nursery. - That was several years ago, Captain. - There was a young rabbit from Bangkok whose feet were incredibly hot. - That'll do, Doctor. - That's a very traditional limerick I'll have you know. - Maybe save the last few verses for a different occasion, Doctor. - I doubt there'll ever be an occasion to use them in public, Commander. - I have it, eh? It had better not mention young rabbits from Nandilly, Lieutenant, or I'm sending you home. - No, it's nothing like that. - We do really need to get on. Time is running short. Can the dopey sounding one please get on with it? - Go ahead, Lieutenant. - Roses are red, carrots are orange, coffee is strong, so I'll have the porridge. I never said it was any good. - And a good thing too, I hate disappointments. - Well, I think it was original, if nothing else. - It was good enough for a level check. Now, if... - I'm sorry, I'd better get that. Captain Rabbit here. - Robot Delta to Captain Rabbit. - Delta, what's happening? - No issue here, Captain. Just checking in at per the instructions. - What instructions? Where's Lieutenant One-Eyed Jake? - He had to go and lie down, because he had eye strain. - Eye strain? He only has one. - Which probably puts it under more strain than most. - What does it say on the list, Delta? - Um, number one, set in chair. And I must say, it's a very coffee chair you have, Captain. It's got a pleasant little bomb groove. Number two, don't touch anything, which is a silly thing to put as there's nothing to touch from here. You can't reach anything. Number three, call the Captain if anything happens. Well, he's got nothing to worry about there. Everything is a-okay. Number four, don't tell the Captain that I've gone for a lie down. Oh, I think I've made a mess of that one. Okay, daughter, get the security chief to join you on the bridge until we get back. Rabbit out. Commander Fumper, remind me to have a word with Lieutenant Jake when we get back. - Aye, Captain. - Yes, that one. - Can we please get on? We're on a tight schedule. - Do you mind if we have a couple of minutes? I had a cabbage slushier earlier on than the ice is moving a bit quicker than I thought. - If you must, Lieutenant. Sorry about this. - This is intolerable. I am not used to working with such unprofessional, insufferable, half-witting. Wait, wait. No! (laughing) Mimic 543 in position. When they say the word and go live, we will unleash the hypnotic signal that galaxy will be ours. - We're ready for you now. - Oh, right. Very good. - Do you have the script in front of you? - We all do. - Most of us do. - Excellent. Just relax then. It will all be over in no time. - Excuse me, but I thought we were doing a run-through to make sure everything is okay. - It was a very wise suggestion. - We don't want any nasty surprises when we go live on air. - There's no need. We mustn't miss our window of opportunity. - I'm sure a quick read-through won't hurt. - I agree with my crew. If we're going to do this, we have to do it right. I mean, that is we aren't going to make fools out of ourselves in front of the president. If we don't rehearse, we don't broadcast. - Oh, very well, if you must. - I'm speaking to you from the bridge of the jack-lope, the flagship of Hair Command. Hang on. No, I'm not. - I can make beeping noises in the background if that helps. - I don't think that we necessary, Luden. - Please get on with us. - Sorry. - I am speaking to you now from the bridge of the jack-lope, the flagship of Hair Command. I have recently completed a patrol run and asked my commander for results. Commander Fumper, whatever results of our patrol run. - Nothing to report, Captain. It was as quiet as a cushion. - I asked my communications officer for her thoughts. - Lieutenant is, what do you think? - Nothing to report, Captain. - We have established that there is nothing happening when suddenly, when suddenly, suddenly. - Ow. There's something approaching, Captain. - There was something on the view screen approaching their jack-lope at speed. - When do I get a line? - Page five. - But it's only five pages long. - You've got a bit of a wait then, haven't you, Doctor? - I don't know why I bother. - There was something on the view screen approaching at speed. I asked my communication officer to hail them. Hail them, Commander is. - Aye, aye, Captain. Strange, featureless object. Please identify yourself. - Captain, I have a suggestion. - Shoot the rider. - What was that? - Nothing. Please carry on. - What is it, Commander? - Captain, I have a suggestion. What is it, Commander? - We should go to yellow alert and raise our shields. - Yes, that's a good idea. Do that. - Go to yellow alert. - Is there a sound effect to that? - I'm not entirely sure. There are a lot of buttons here. - I thought you were the one who organized all this. - I am, but you know there are a lot of buttons in here. - I'll do the yellow alert. - Aye, aye, aye, aye, aye. - That's a red alert. - Oh, right. Let me have another go. - Aye, aye, aye, aye. - That's exactly the same. - No, it wasn't. I was on my tip toes to make it higher. - Maybe we should dispense with the noises for now. They will appear in the live broadcast. - Yes, I'm sure they will. - Captain, there is still no response to my hails. - What? - Oh, the play. Prepare to go to red alert, Commander. - Aye, Captain. I take it we don't have any red alert sounds just yet. - There are a lot of buttons in here. - I can-- - I don't think that will be necessary, Lieutenant. - I was just trying to help. - Can you please just get on with it? - I'm still waiting for my first line. Just saying. - Don't worry about it, Doctor. I don't have much to see either. - Thank heavens for small mercies, Lieutenant. - Shall we take it from Commander Thumpur's line by the red alert? - Aye, Captain. Go to red alert, Lieutenant McZucker. - What are our scans detecting? - Ice, rock, dust. I believe it's a comet, sir. - Stand down, everybody. There is nothing to fear this time. - Thank goodness for that. I was getting quite concerned. Oh, brother, is this terrible? - On this occasion, there was nothing to fear. It was just a harmless piece of space debris. The well oil team on the bridge of the jackalope are ready for anything. - I got here as quick as I could. - Have I missed anything? - Oh, Doctor, you're always just a minute too late. (laughing) - Well, that was worth the wait. - Yes, well done. I'm sure you're all happy with the rehearsal you've just done. Now, if you just stay put, it will be time for broadcast very shortly. (beeping) - Sorry, Mirga. - If you don't keep it on silent, I will be forced to take it off you, Captain. - Yes, sorry again. Captain Rabbit here. - Well, my doctor here, Captain. The security chief suggested I give you a call. - Why, what's wrong? - There's a green flashing light thing on Commander Zumper Science desk. We don't know what it means. - Hang on a minute. I'll put you on loudspeaker. - Oh. - loudspeaker. - Okay, now repeat what you just said. - loudspeaker? - No, before that. - Ooh. - Repeat what you said about Commander Fumpers Terminal. - Ah, there's a green flashing light on it. - Interesting, where is it? - On the terminal. - Where? - On top. - Is there security chief with you? - You're Captain. - Can you identify where the light is coming from? - I kept him, that I can. - Where is it, chief? - On your control panel, Commander. - Doesn't it make you feel safe for knowing those two are in charge of the ship? - Maybe I should beam back to the ship, Captain? - Agree, Commander. Let me know what these developments are. - Aye, Captain, Delta, beam me up. - What's going on? Is everything okay? - We've just got to send Commander Thumper back to the ship. Nothing to worry about. - But he's one of the main parts. - He has to be here for the broadcast or it'll go wrong. Can't you send the other one back? The one with only one line? He won't be missed. - Well, that's just charming. - You see, Commander? It's that green one there. - You did well to bring it to our attention. This is highly dangerous. - What does it mean? A work court beach? Life's one million? Are we out of carrots and a mess all again? - Fortunately not. Following the mimic incursion into Hair Command, we fitted a jello detector. - So does that mean the mimics are in the area? - I'm afraid it does, Chief. The big question now is where? - Can you narrow down the location so we can get a fix on the signal? - That's what I'm doing now. Oh my, the Captain may be in danger. (orchestral music) - Deck the bow with bows of holy, follow, follow, follow, follow. - 'Tis the season to be jolly, follow, follow, follow, follow, follow. - Don't we know our gay apparel, follow, follow, follow, follow, joining Captain? - No. - La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la. - Do you take requests? - Anything you like, Doctor? - Please, stop singing. (gasps) - Has that Commander of yours come back yet? We really need to be broadcasting on time. - I'm sure that we can rearrange things. Maybe someone else from another outpost can go first. - No, no, no. We must go on first. We must open the broadcast and release. Everything is depending on it. - It's only a little play, no need to get so angry about it. - It isn't a little play, it's the whole mimic invasion plans for Gil. I said that, I didn't say that. Who is it hot in here, is it just me? What about those raiders, huh? - Did you bring weapons with you? - Yes, Captain, charged and ready. - You need to teach Commander Thumper, a thing about keeping a phaser charged. - Mine's charged to Captain. - Do you want a medal? - Just saying, that's all. - Captain, I have some troubling information. - Mr. Pickles is a mimic. - Yes, how did you know? - Would you believe he told us? - No. - Well, he did. So stop looking so smug and get your phaser ready. - We have you surrounded, Mimic. There is no escape. Come out with your, whatever comes closest to resembling hands up. - It's gone very quiet, Captain. I don't like it. On the count of three, you engage. Ready? - I can't fit it. - I can't fit it. - One. Two. Three. (gun firing) - There's nobody here. - I bet he's got a way through those air vents. Jello can get everywhere if you're not careful. - Look, in the corner over there, it's the original Pickles. - Thank you very much. I don't know what happened. He came out of nowhere and swallowed me. - He's not a mimic, Captain. - Thank you for getting me out of there. I'm just so sorry that you missed your opportunity to broadcast to the rest of the galaxy. - Don't be sorry. Hamis isn't about being famous or showing off how great you are. It's about the small things. They bring a smile to the face of the kitten. - Dancing in snowflakes on, Hamis morning. - Kissing under the mistletoe at the Hamis party. - Looking after the sick and helpless on Hamis day? - Being with family and friends. - Yes, you're right. It's almost time for the President's address. - My fellow overvitians, I am talking to you today from my office in Hair Command. Over the past few years, we've found ourselves under attack, facing challenges on our doorstep, finding our values questioned by those who seek to undermine our way of life. We are still fighting that fight on a daily basis. But it is thanks to those in service of our starships, our Air Force, in our infantry and on our seas, that we continue to enjoy our freedoms. I believe that the galaxy has turned a corner. No longer do we distrust each other like we have in the past. We have learned to ask out for help, to offer pause a friendship, and to seek to extend our arms to those who may be sharp out. I wish Mary Havens to all our armed forces. Stay safe and know that you are loved by all those back home, waiting for you. (gentle music) - Featured in the cast were Alex Gilmore as Captain Peter Rabbit. Bobby Owens as Lieutenant Commander Tanya Ears. Tom Chalker as Commander Thumper. David McKeiver as Lieutenant Taddy McZacker. Michael Liebman as Dr. Harvey Hopper Smith. Stefani Alintenbaum as Robot Delta. Captain John Tatterzak as security chief. John Bell as Mr. Pickles and Mimic Pickles. Glenn Haskell as the President of Hair Command. Star Rabbit Tracks Pause Across the Galaxy was written by N.J. Rainford. Series created by Captain John Tatterzak. Post-production by James W. Smagata. We would like to confirm that no harm came to Lieutenant one-eyed Jake, who had a note from his mum, which excused him from bridge duty. Any resemblance between our characters and actual persons living or dead is extremely unlikely. We are not affiliated in any way with Star Trek, Bambi and Beatrix Potter. This production is for enjoyment purposes only. I'm your announcer, Bobby Owens, from Nisfits Audio. Copyright 2015. (Music) - When do I get a line? Just seeing that's all.