Informally God
Judas and The Crucifixion of Jesus, Remorse vs. Regret
Hi guys. Welcome to another episode of informally God. Today I would like to reflect, talk about, touch on a couple of topics that I'll relate. You know, hopefully I can, you know, tie them all together into some sort of semblance of logic. But I had some, I had some questions last week, but I think I want to title this the Crucification or the Crucifixion. I don't know how to, how to say that, but the Crucifixion of Jesus Christ and remorse versus repentance. Because one of the things, you know, I'm, I guess I'm about like spiritually like about four years old now. It's been since, sorry for the background noise, but it's been since about 2020 that I began, you know, my journey with God. And it's, it's really mind-blowing how deep this kind of rabbit hole of right and wrong goes to me. It's really mind-blowing, this whole kind of idea or the spiritual law and the spiritual trying to grasp the spiritual understanding of how wrong we are as human beings about what's right and wrong. It's crazy how many times I've had to come back and revisit this over and over and over again. And it's, you know, a submission each and every time that I am not God and that I don't know really what is right and what's wrong. I don't remember, I think I was watching something or I don't know how I came up upon this. I knew it last week, but, you know, in the course of all the things that have happened since then, I kind of forgot how I came into this. But I started, hold on, I have some notes written down, but so I started to, I came across something where I guess there was like a pastor or somebody who had gone around asking people, just random people, if Judas went to hell or he went to heaven. Because, you know, as the story goes, you know, Jesus knew that, you know, he would be betrayed ultimately and Judas betrayed Jesus for, I think, 30 pieces of silver or something like this. He betrayed Jesus, essentially, for money. And the story goes that he was so guilty, he felt so guilty that he went and he committed suicide, he hanged himself, because, you know, this eventually led to the crucifixion of Jesus Christ. And I think that it was a pastor, he went around, I don't know, I read this article where he went around, I guess, asking people if Judas went to heaven or if he went to hell. And it's an interesting question because then it started to make me wonder. And, you know, what I, what I came to was, you know, it's not about what we do. That's what I kept coming back to, you know, it doesn't matter that Judas betrayed Jesus Christ, because even the devil, and what the devil does is a part of, you know, God's ultimate victory, you know, he is so great and so victorious that his plans, you know, even include the the busyness of the devil, you know, I, you know, God, you know, would say something like, you know, the same thing that he said with Moses, you know, if you go to the Pharaoh, and every time you go back to the Pharaoh and you say, let my people go, I'm going to harden his heart every single time. So, you know, even this whole idea of, you know, the devil, you know, just, you know, something wrong being done, you know, this all is the great victory and the rightness ultimately of God. So I was thinking, you know, like it really, you know, it doesn't matter because it's not really about what he did. You know, you know, Jesus Christ belonged to God. And so it wouldn't really matter at the end of the day what Judas did, you know, and then I started thinking, well, you know, if you know, Judas had a repentant heart, you know, then his father is always in God, you know, and he can always come back to God. And then that led me further down into the rabbit hole of, you know, what is the difference between, like, repentance and remorse, you know, because when I was reading some articles online, it was saying that, you know, repentance is not the same thing as remorse. You know, you can have a, this just set me on an old down a rabbit hole. And, you know, it's interesting, because I had a conversation with someone last week also who was talking about, you know, the bad things that they did. And it was really awesome in the sense that, you know, when I asked this person, I said, well, do you feel bad about what you did? And they said to me, no, I don't feel bad about what I did. I regret it, you know, and then that made me wonder. And then, but it was just such a beautiful thing, because for the first time in spirit, I was just like, you know, it's a great thing that you didn't feel bad about what you did. It's a great thing not to feel bad about what you did, because that's not the point here. And then this sent me, you know, all down the rabbit hole and coming back to this, you know, spiritual lesson again and again and again of how we don't know what's right and what's wrong. And, you know, this, you know, repentance versus remorse. And I'm not, you know, exactly sure, you know, at this stage in the game that I can draw a clear line, I'm just kind of like thinking out loud here. You can have, I don't know if you can have fake repentance. You know, I know that I don't know if you can have that. But I think remorse is more people oriented. It's it's it's it's it's bad. It's bad to have remorse, quote unquote bad. It's bad to have remorse. I don't want you to say sorry to me, because you feel bad about doing something to me. You know, I want you to repent, you know, so that you never have to do that again, because to feel bad about something is just going to drive you to continue to do the thing that you don't want to do. So you want to be free and clear of that. Human beings make each other feel bad. You know, you should feel so ashamed of yourself. You should feel so terrible about what you did. And no, no, no, no, no, no, that's wrong. You know, we have laws in this society, not in an arbitrary fashion. We don't have laws because we are in submissions to one another as human beings. We have laws because they're an extension of spiritual laws, a deep spiritual order that exists in this universe that goes beyond our power as human beings. You know, we we have laws as an extension of the spiritual law of God in his kingdom. And we are to enforce those laws, because they come from a primary place, you know, the cops and, you know, police stations, that's not the primary place. This is an extension of the primary orientation of the spiritual realm, which is all that exists. It's not bad, you know, to murder someone, you know, because, and this is a good, you know, test of whether people have an understanding of things, you know, when people go around saying that things are wrong, you know, like homosexuality, which it is. But when you go around asking people, you know, why is this wrong? Why is homosexuality wrong? Why is murdering someone wrong? And, you know, everybody has a clear understanding of why it's wrong, but nobody can really explain why. And, you know, this is what I'm after. I'm not after some sort of superficial, you know, copy and paste idea that you have, you know, because you have other people have the same idea, you know, it's, it's really true what Jesse Lee Peterson says, you know, you have to know that you know, that you know, that you know, you have to know deep down, you know, for yourself, that this is, is what it is, that this is the truth of the matter. You know, and murder is wrong, you know, because, you know, it's a spiritual violation. We do not create life. You know, life happens through us, you know, life is created through us as human beings, you know, through a man and a woman, but we don't create life. And we certainly, we don't eliminate life either, regardless of what that illusion is. And so, you know, spiritually, you know, we create nothing. And so we are to, you know, you know, not to play God, and we are not to act as if we are God, and to try to eliminate anything because we don't create anything. It is, it's a violation of spirit. It's not because everybody in the world says it's wrong. It's not because, you know, there are police stations and police people who dress in uniforms who say it's wrong, it's wrong because spiritually, first and foremost, it's wrong. But you have to know that you know that you know that you know that you know that you know yourself. But I just I kind of wanted to, you know, just speak on, you know, this this this whole idea of repentance and remorse, you know, it's not good to feel bad. It's good, you know, to be able to see a period, it's good to be able to see period, it's good to be able to see period spiritually. And when you see spiritually, it will come naturally that you will see that you are in violation of something much bigger than yourself. And when you see naturally that you are in violation, you will see naturally that it was just the wrong thing. And then you will course correct. And you know, that Holy Spirit within yourself that resides within yourself is what will cause you to course correct. It's not a spirit that makes you feel like crap about yourself. It's not a spirit that makes you want to go and hang yourself. It's a spirit, you know, that says, I love you and you know, not what you do. And so let me guide you and you surrender this will of yours and you know, you can course correct. To be able to see clearly, you know, is to be able to change. If you know, you can't change when you have all these emotions, you know, coming from the wellspring of anger, you know, this guilt, this, these are not, you know, emotions are not of God in that manner. And, you know, when I was talking to that person, you know, who, you know, I could see for the first time, you know, when they said, you know, when they were talking about the bad things that they had done, quote unquote, you know, it just brought so much joy to my heart. And I guess that was really crazy to me too, you know, to recognize like, wow, it's really great that you don't feel bad that you did something bad, you know, like this is crazy to me. But it's really great that this person didn't feel bad. And so I said, well, how do you know that you did something wrong? You know, like, if you didn't feel bad about it, but you regret it, why do you regret it? You know, and they had a hard time kind of there, you know, explaining it, but they said essentially, even though they're kind of, you know, like their faith isn't like deep in God, you know, they said, you know, because inside of myself, I felt messed up, you know, I didn't feel bad, but something inside of myself felt messed up. I know that, you know, I was doing something wrong, you know, and then I started asking this person because, you know, they've had a rough life, you know, about all the bad things that they've done quote unquote in their past. And I said to them, I said, well, do you know, you know, did you know, even when you were doing all these horrible things in the past that they were wrong when you were doing them? And the person said, you know, because they were from the streets. And they were saying, yeah, I knew even at the time, you know, that I was doing something wrong. But I, you know, what can you do? You know, like, that's the world you're in at the time, that's the reality, the quote unquote, the fake reality that you're in at the time. And so you have to go according to those spiritual rules, right, the spiritual rules of the devil that causes you to disrupt, even though you know better than that, even though there's a higher self in you that knows better than that. And it was just like a really enlight conversation for me. Because like I said, you know, the person was pretty much just like, you know, I didn't feel bad, you know, about what I did, even though it was bad, but I regretted it. Because, you know, there was something deep within me that knows, you know, that that this is not the order of things. This is not how things should go. There's something deep deep within side of us. That knows, you know, that knows, you know, this Bible, you know, that is written in our heart, you know, not necessarily in a book that we have to read. But you know, when we get still, there is the blueprint of God, there is the blueprint of creation there that we can access when we start practicing a stillness to get to it, to be able to see it. There's, you know, we were divinely created, we were perfectly created. There's the blueprint of God deep down inside, you know, buried, you know, under the wreckage of trauma and the devil and you know, all this unconsciousness. Yeah, and I think that's all, you know, I wanted to say, you know, you know, you know, to me that the question of whether Judas went to hell or not is not really the point, you know, God is, you know, he loves us no matter what we do, it's not about what we do. You know, it's about, you know, how sincere we are in repenting. It's about how sincere we are in thirsting after him and wanting him and wanting to do the right thing. It's about the sincerity of our hearts and the effort, you know, that we put in to develop a relationship with God. It's not about what we do, you know, because, you know, he understands, you know, he's God, you know, so it's, you know, remorse. It's not about feeling bad, you know, and, you know, when you start walking with God, you will even, you know, I did an episode, the last episode that I did was all about, you know, what does God have to say, you know, not what do people have to say? What does God have to say who give to two Fs about the judgment of human beings? Because the judgment of human beings is always designed to make you, you know, jump off a bridge. It's always designed to tell you, you know, where you don't belong, how you never belong here, you don't belong here, you don't belong here, you should always feel bad about yourself or this, that, this, that, this and that, you should always be trying to hide yourself. You should always be trying to be perfect, even though you're not, you know, who, you know, what does God have to say? At the end of the day, and develop a developing a relationship based off of that unknowing. And, you know, as a result of that, not knowing having to come back and to come back and to come back to him each and every time, you know, to get more and more revelation to get more and more answers from him. And you know, which in turn, you know, strengthens your relationship with him. It's not about, like I said, what what we do. It's not about feeling bad for the things that we can't even control. Because if we can control them, we wouldn't do them in the first place, right? So I think that's all I have to say about that. And I will talk to you guys in another episode of informally God soon. Thanks for listening. Bye bye.