The MFKN Show
guest Ray Chapman
[MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] [MUSIC] >> Good evening, good evening ladies and gentlemen, kings and queens. I go by the queen. And I want to welcome you all to August edition. I have a guess to my immediate left. And I met this young man at a poetry reading that we have held. Poetry reading is always every third Sundays from 4 p.m. to 7 p.m. And he gave a compelling poetic piece. So without further ado, ladies and gentlemen, let's give it up for Ray Chapman. >> Hey, hey. >> Welcome to the show young man, how are we doing? >> I'm doing good. I appreciate your fam. >> No problem, no problem. How was your day today? >> It was good. It's busy working, but I'm all right. >> Working man, come on. See, that deserve a clap there, but you know what I'm saying? >> [APPLAUSE] >> So Ray, I was just telling the audience, like when I first met you, you gave a compelling piece. The show was almost over with. And I connected with the piece because I too am a parent. You want to just talk about that piece. I mean, if you don't want to get in depth, don't worry about that. >> No, so the piece was about my daughter. I just had my fifth child. And after I had my fifth child in December, it was December 26th, the day after Christmas. So I was working for a company. I had a couple, had my company that I was still doing on the side. But after, once after a week, once my baby came home from the hospital, my fourth child, which was my younger daughter before her. She wanted to get a rare case in the morning, went to the hospital. I had already used all my PTO. I used my vacation, everything for the baby that came. >> Right. >> So I wanted to born in the hospital with my daughter. And at the time, I was struggling because I run my company. The companies that I had, I was trying to make money. I'm trying to manage job sites from the hospital. It was just rough. So I'm seeing that I'm losing money. Her mother is a stay-at-home mom. So all the income is on me. So when I'm sitting there and I'm watching money leave, I got people on job sites. I'm having back and forth with customers, saying my guys are doing X, Y, Z. So I'm trying to work and do what I'm doing there. And I just realized this is, this ain't it. I can't do it. At first, I thought I was being, I was successful because I was running my company. I was doing pretty decent. But the minute that stopped and I was inside of a space to where I couldn't physically be at those job sites. So I couldn't physically be at that event space. The money stopped. Right. It's nice and clean. It's all happened. So sitting there, I couldn't do anything but right. I'm listening to a cry screen. They're digging in their own conveyance. You know, and I'm there and everything in my heart is trying to protect everything in my heart. It's trying to be there for. But there's nothing I can do. I don't know what to do for you. But hold your hand and try and talk you through whatever's going on. So as I'm doing it, I just need the way to get it out. So I just wrote it down. You brought it to my eye that day. So how's my momma doing? She doing great. There we go. Let's get the testimony in. Right, right. Now she was good after, I want to say a couple of weeks here, coming home to Antibiotic. So everything turned out good. You know, even though you went through that traumatic hump, if you will, sometimes we have to go through that in life in order for us to have like a better outcome, a stronger outcome, a testimony. You want to identify with what do you think from looking back while you were in the ish versus what you are now. It changed a lot. It changed my way of thinking about the business that I was doing. Okay. So at the time I was trying to build it. I had an age back company who gave MEP mechanical electrical and plumbing. And I was also, I'm a property manager of a commercial space. My business partners, he owns the space. So we were looking to just do events at first. And I'm coordinating the events while I'm there. And it wasn't working. But when I left, it was big on me to create passive income. I need to be able to make money while I'm not here. Right, it was big. It was the whole point of everything I was doing. Cause now I'm realizing that, yeah, you can be successful in business and make money. But if your money stops, my expenses are crazy. So if I really wanted to do what I'm saying I'm doing or do what I think I'm doing, I need that income to be passive. So I switched gears when I came home and pushed instead of just doing events, it was rental space, rent this out to other people. Right. So once we switched gears into that mode and that became the focal point business took off. Now what happened to them people that were doing their job though? They gone. I just want to make sure we click. I want you skipping fast, any of that. They gone. They gone. But it's so hard to find people that actually work in the field and that are good and consistent. The guys who are pretty decent, they usually doing their own thing randomly. So you will see those same guys that say they want to be in HVAC, but they don't want to go be a trucker or want to go start this company, that company. Because everybody who's an entrepreneur, they got all kind of crazy ideas. Not crazy, but ideas. Yeah, yeah. No, thank you for giving them a chance. First of all, let's just throw that out there. Well, what's my hand clap? Thank you for giving them a chance. Honey, I'm over here doing 20 things, alright? You're doing 21. Okay, no worries. See, how do you do me? I don't know. You did it, right? You did it. No, I appreciate them for the work that they gave. They still helped me build my company. I helped them feed their family for the small portion of the time they were with me. So, for me, it's a win-win regardless. I appreciate that. What got you into this? My uncle, HVAC. Yes, sir. So, my uncle, a little background in history, I wasn't this type of guy. I wasn't a fix it got. So, got to some trouble when I was in my younger 20s, just because of the career path I chose. I chose to make money in the easy way, quote unquote, right now. I got tired of getting my little slaps on the wrist doing what I was doing, and my uncle basically told me he was like, "Well, you're too smart." You know what you're doing? Because he knew how I was moving. He knew everything about me just in general. So, he was like, "You can go do something. Do something with yourself." And he was in the industry. So, he encouraged me to go to school, and my younger brother and my younger cousin, they went a year before me. And we were all kind of mixed up in the same stuff. So, when they went, it was a shock to me that they got out so fast. They went to school, and within a year, a year and a half, they were out, and I was still in the same situation. So, I was like, "Man, let me go get something behind my name." Well, some that can't nobody take from me, some that I don't have to fall back on the negativity. So, I went to school for it. I worked for a company. It just started to build myself. And I originally got my start at the YMCA. That was a lady by the name of Sonja Crowd, and I was here for her, her kudos. But she saw me, I was sneaking in the YMCA, was going to go play. I'm going to go play ball. They want to play the dance. I'm sneaking in, like I always do. My brother's work up there. They used to. But you were sneaking in? Yeah, they ain't got no pooling. They could do nothing. Shout out to Miss Sonja. Right, right. She saw me, she saw me sneaking in, and she called me to her office. Her office was like, "I had to pass her office, but I didn't know her personally." And when she called me in, she called me by my nickname. She said, "Hey, I'm like, how are you in my brain? How do you know that?" So, she was like, "I see your brother's here in my name around." So, she's like, "What are you looking to do?" At the time, I had just started school like a week prior. I was filing for my divorce. I got married at 21. So, at the time, I'm like 27 right now. So, I was filing for my divorce child's divorce. So, I'm just telling her what I'm going through and what I'm working on. And I'm like, "Realist me." I started school trying to get my, you know, I'm just trying to get my life back on track. I got this going on and she said, "See y'all paying a job." Just like that. She said, "Come on." She said, "You're in school for HVAC. We have a property management position, but it's full right now. But I'll get you on and just, you know, just to get you started. And it'll look good on your resume." So, I got on and I'm just sitting around, you know, I'm refing here. And watching the Wake Center, like, you know, just doing a little small stuff. And as I'm married, I see they have a punching bag downstairs. I'm just looking at the stuff so I start coming to her. Like, "Hey, you got a punching bag down there? Why y'all don't do no classes?" And then like that. And she slid me a book and say, "You do it." Just slid me a book. You do it. I'm like, "Okay." I don't know nothing about no classes, no nothing. I ain't. I'm just not this guy right now. So, she slid it to me, so I'm doing a research because I want to do good. She gave me an opportunity, I wanted to do good. So, I started to start up a class, but while I'm doing it, I see a bunch of young kids that are running around the white, and they bang. Like, when I say young, they put 15, 16, 17. And they turn up the equipment. I'm like, "What the fuck?" Why do you know that happens? Right, right. So, on a humble, I just ran into a group of them, just being a worker. And they look at me up and down. They say, "I was just supposed to be an OG or something." They just talk crazy. I'm like, "I'm full of your co-teller." Right, right. I'm like, "I ain't supposed to be done." I'm just talking to them like normal, because that's how I would talk to them if they was outside. I'm like, "I ain't. I'm just me." So, while I'm talking to them, I like them. I like their character. I like them being bold. I saw myself in them, so it was like, "Hey, I like y'all silly." But y'all trying to get in trouble doing what y'all doing. Y'all chill out. And they, you know, they heard me. It was like, "I ain't really chipping off what you're doing, but if you're trying to cause an issue, just chill, bro." They heard me, and I reached back out to the song. Just saying, "Look." I said, "Who are them kids that you got in the gym in the way room?" And she said, "That's my program." I just started a program for average teens in the neighborhood. It's a small program. It's like 88 kids there. I said, "I don't know what you're doing, but I want to part of it." Those are my kind of kids. And she was like, "Okay, well, get with." And at the time, there were other people that were over that program. Get with them and then let them work with you. I said, "No problem." So I started working with them. And because of who I was and how they related to me, they don't listen to me. They weren't listening to the other guys. Yes, I go. Yeah, because those guys didn't care for them the same way, and if they did, they didn't relate to them. Yeah. So for me, I see you. I know exactly what you're getting to and what you want. So it's like, "Well, if you're doing that, you should be doing this. You don't." I'm going to talk to them like regular. I just don't want you to do X, Y, and Z. Whereas the other guys, really, it's a crib move for them. So they're in that space, but these kids just look good on that resume, but they can't stand them. Whereas these kids are the kids that I would have been outside with anyway. So I'll reach back out to them. It's like, "Hey, I want to read structure because the way it's set up is kind of, you know, whatever." And she said, "Why don't you run it?" Like, "Can kids listen to you anyway?" Yeah. So she wound up giving me the program. I started the boxing program after that, like immediately after that. And the boxing program went to the third highest revenue, or generating revenue in that facility. And then... [applause] And then the program was called "Mending Action." And she started this. She started the name. It was called "Mending Action." But we rescheduled the program. That's where I got my start. Because now I've run a nonprofit called "First Class Mending Action." Really piggybacking off the work that she started. But after she left, they wanted to close down the program. They cleaned up every... I'm not going to say cleaned up, but they changed everything else to see that. Oh, wow. You know, first and foremost, shout out to your uncle and shout out to Ms. Sonya once again. I believe what they did during your group was provide you with a healthy distraction. You know, technically speaking, you were one of those kids and you were looking for something. And you just saw something you went away with. So I'm proud of you, man. Appreciate it. Appreciate it. We should be proud of yourself. Men in action. So first of all, did she retire or did she get left? No, she went to another facility that was in... Oh, yeah. She went to another state. They offered it because she turned that YMCA around. You guys are in contact? I talked to her every blue moon, like big text message. We haven't spoken in a while. Yeah, I'll just give a reverend for what she did, the part she played in my life where she's been going forward. Yeah, that's one thing I learned about people. When people cross your path and they change your life for them better, those are the people you want to never let go. I don't want to use the word "queen" going to, but, you know, you may not find another person like that. Even though y'all physically not where you guys used to be, when you had her time, she had your time and you guys communicated. Now you guys are starting a new chapter in life. You know, those are the people you always want to keep in your corner. (Applause) So what was the YMCA that you was affiliated with? Which one was it? It was the MSNYMCA in Ferguson. The MSYMCA was okay, all right. Yeah, my mother stays not too far away from there. My brother's working up there, so when I went in, I was just sneaking in. You're facing play ball, man. That's all I wanted to do. Not in that order. Yeah, not in that order. Not in that order. Mm-hmm. The program I went to American Trade School, and it was a year and two months. I once said 14 months total, and that was a big thing for me. It changed my life because I had something behind my name. And I was always the guy who, even when I worked at a company, I've only worked there, but prior to me going to school, I worked at two companies in my life. And I always wanted to prove myself, when you get into it, especially when you're young, I'm competitive. I play basketball when I was younger. So when I go into a situation, I want to prove that I'm capable of doing it. And then once I see that I'm capable, I want to prove that I'm better than the people who I'm measuring myself up to. So you start competing to a certain degree. But that's how I was until I realized that I'm competing for an imaginary prize. You're saying nothing? Like I'm just working myself to death in these companies. Yeah, they're getting money off of me. It's me, my personal conviction that makes me want to work a certain kind of way or present myself a certain kind of way. And I realized I'm giving it to an entity that could care less about me. And that's kind of what it is. It made me branch off and start gearing towards entrepreneurship. But I didn't have an avenue outside of what I knew after that. So I want to just get down about our doors and I'm going to say a legal activity to a certain degree to make ends me because I needed that at the time. It was necessary. I was doing it for the money, not for nothing else. I'm from a thrill. I'm a low-key guy. I drive a van. I was not that. I thought I knew it. It was strictly about the money. Yeah. And then when I was moving, I started seeing people to where it's really about the money for you too. I learned another way to make money, legit money. But I was able to make the same type of money. The money that I couldn't make, then I would respect everybody. Hey, I'll give what you're doing, but that's the day. That's the day. It ain't going to make no sense. I can mean going back myself. I like to talk to you. I don't have a problem with acknowledging that you was out there doing something that was quote unquote illegal. Okay, but you're absolutely right. Sometimes we have to do what we need to do to survive. The other thing that you did do was you grew out of that lifestyle and decided to do something more effective to your community and to yourself. I'm stuck in my ways. That's all I'm going to do forever. But it seems like you was like, "Hey, I don't know if you say you're going to hit a number or however that look." But before it is, you had other avenues on what you wanted to do with your life because this consequence is when you do that, that alternative. Oh, yeah. I didn't know it at the time. I was just in the mix. Oddly enough, property is my way of getting out. I thought that I was going to be able to hustle my way up until I build it. You know, start making money off. You know, I wanted to get into property even early on, but I thought that was going to be my avenue. And I'll find out later on that it wasn't. Right. Those are the better way to get your feet into that. You're feeding the door. The entry. The entry, yeah. There's a much better way to get in there than that avenue. For sure. Yeah, I'm glad you decided to take another route. I'm glad too, man. I probably didn't say you messed up. So, what kind of, I know you said that you're teaching the young men to box, but in between the boxing matches, you also are giving them life skills and teaching them, you know, what's out of, you know, move forward in life, not just show that it's all about boxing. Because from what I hear, boxing is a way to actually train the mind also. So, are you giving them them, all them other steps too? Not just how to defend and fight and use your hands, but actual life skills. For sure. So, the actual program isn't even about boxing itself. The program is about teaching the youth basically how to turn your hustle into a legit business. Like, we teach them creative. We teach them you better than you teach them. The stuff that you need to know as an adult. So, financial literacy. Financial literacy, for sure. So, it's financial literacy, but it's also based off, and we also expose them to a different career opportunity. So, like, we'll take them to different places and say, "Hey, this is a black-owned store here." So, these guys are doing X, Y, and Z. And if you want to go in that lane, now you've got a connection to them where you don't have to find them. We'll find them for you once we find out what you're trying to do. If you want to go in construction, this is what it looks like. And then, if you really want to do it, then he's over the union over here. He's over this. And then, it's like connecting them because you don't know what you don't know. And then, we also know it ain't about what you know. It's who you know. So, if you don't have a skill and you don't know what you're looking for, then we'll try and help you find some. And then, once you find it, you still need to know people in that industry. So, it's really great. Absolutely. So, it's giving them that. But being real, I was the same way. You want to do what you want to do. They don't really want to learn this stuff, but you don't have to learn it because you want to go play ball because we got a big basketball program as well, me and my younger brother. So, we do basketball and we do boxing with both of my younger brothers. We do basketball and we boxing. Well, we basically have the medicine in the county. You're coming for this, but you don't have to learn this. Right. That's what I was going to say. Those two activities that y'all do, they got to build, you know, have a before that you guys first show that they're actually serious about learning what you're giving them before they can get in the ring or get on the court or something like that. So, what you're saying is they both work together. For sure, because I don't even like them boxing to compete personally. It's not a personal thing for me. It's not a because... That's a discipline thing. Yeah, it's just for one of the young men, because it's centered around our young men. Even though we do have women in the program, it's centered around our young men. You need to learn how to defend yourself, period. Right. This ain't got to do with nothing else. This is a life skill that you need in your back pocket. This ain't about you going in the ring and trying to compete. This ain't about you trying to get golden gloves. This ain't nothing. You just need to be able to defend yourself on a base level, because there can come a time to where you don't have nothing else but the hands that God gave you. You don't have to learn how to make it work. I do. I like how you help them in their mind. They're not only learning the tools of physical boxing men, but they're learning the tools of knowing their community and their neighborhood. Hey, this is black on. This is that. This is that. And you're teaching them to just, you know, life is a learning lesson. And I like that. You should keep, that's not the why though. They canceled it at the why we have to restart it and I'm doing it on our own. Okay. So you're doing it at another location? No, we just do a period. So also, there is no, for us, there is no set location. Okay, gotcha. So we got, we've ran out several gyms, black community centers that we do basketball that we may run out another space to go do boxing. Or now, like I'm with some of the brothers that I partnered with in, with their commercial companies, we'll take them there to do boxing. So look, like just little stuff to keep them engaged, but there's no facility right now. In the future, we hope that. Yeah, yeah. I believe it will. And this program is continuously growing. Okay. I love that. I didn't, I probably was over there doing something else. So what was the reason why the other Y stopped doing the program and have you, have you reached out to other facilities to see if you can move the program to one of them? Yeah. The, the wider we were at, when she left, that when she left, they brought in her superior, the guy who was above her. And we found out later on he was the guy who she was protecting us from. Cause we were guys off the street. It wasn't like a, it wasn't like we were polished already. And we came into the Y and we were just community activists. Like she pulled me off and I was still in the midst of what I was doing. I was like, you know, I'm, I'm just coming in. So she believed in us. She gave us opportunities. She gave us, um, like a, um, confidence. I didn't, because I didn't believe in myself to do the stuff that I wound up doing when I was there. Basically what you're saying is the guy that took over wasn't a pillar of your community. Man, no, no, no. Hold it. Hold it. That's what you're saying. Yeah. She protected you. How long did you guys kind of like together before she had to depart though? Uh, it's maybe been a year total. What? I would have thought that was like under five years. So we moved fast. You know, I had a, if you hustle, you hustle. Right. So my brain is like, whenever I'm on some, I'm on it. Like it's time to go. And you know, we're waiting for it. It's time to go. Let's go. We'll figure out what we need to figure out on the way there. And we're navigated. We're a pivot if we need to. I got a team of people who I always can reach out to. Or I'm always going to send them. So you, you move a certain kind of way, no matter where you at, you're going to be good. And that's the same thing I tell them kids. Like if you were able to do that forever, you just don't know the same way I didn't know. You know, I'm thinking, this is me. And I'm proud of this. This is all I got. This is what I stand on. If you know me, you know I do this. And then when she's, you know, I'm starting building with other people and it's like, no, you can, that's great what you got, but you don't have to do that. I'm in the industry. And that's when I started learning business. Like, oh, that's the industry. Change industry. The drive, the hustle, the network and the communication. All that's the same. And then I was able to just start bouncing around from there. And then more I learned and more I started reaching out to my people. It's like, hey, I didn't know this, but let me tell you, this is, you know, you can do S1 people. Yeah, you can do S1 people. Yeah, definitely. Definitely. But what she asked me. She might have another outlet for you to reach out to some more YMCs. You know, y'all really don't have to do that normally that one. Yeah, but the, so the guy who came in, and I got fired from that Y. That's why I got a wine. All right. Right, right. So what happened this, since we there, when she left and he came in, he tried, now he's, he tried to figure out who's doing what at this Y. So my name is getting brought up, me and my younger brother. Our name is getting brought up as far as the community work that we're doing there. We're not, I didn't get hired to do this. Right. She pulled me off the streets and said, hey, this will look good. Why are you going through what you're going through? This is all I know. I'm just getting a job because I need one. Right. Like I'm fighting the custody battle and I'm fighting the custody battle with my ex-wife with me not having a full time job. And I'm, I got a choice that says that this is what you do. Right. So it's not like I can really fight it if I don't have another income and say, no, I'm making money. I'm just getting brought up. So this is the only reason why I'm here. But while I'm here, she's nurturing and watering the person that I am as opposed to the image that I made. Okay. So when I, so when they, when he came in, it was about money. So the boxing program was generating revenue. They kept it. Of course. Right. But they cut out the people that had, I was only certified trainer. So I had brought on my brother, my, you know, some people who I know, who I'm just in, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just getting into it. They cut all them out and say, we don't need them. You're the only one that's certified. We're going to keep this running. Okay. So then, um, with the average teams, they look at them as a nuisance. Y'all here, y'all running on the equipment. Y'all, you know, and then I kind of, I have to be here in order for, to keep this calm and cool. Right. And, you know, I'm still, I'm a hard head. I still got a problem with authority. I'm still the same guy. So when I'm talking to him, I'm like, hey, don't touch this. This is what I got. These my people, blah, blah. So I'm talking regular. And he's the region, the guy's the regional, like, he's over in the whole region. So he over Emerson. He's over the other one on page. He over the one on West floor. So it's like everyone in our neighborhood, he's over all of them. So when she left and he came in, he just came to feel the spot, but he's over all of them. So when he came in and we start talking, we got into it about the program because he's telling me, well, maybe we need to scale back. Don't you touch that. These are my kids. If you take this program away now, this time, I'm fully acclimated into the system. At this time, I'm going home for these kids and I'm all the way into it. If you take this away, what you think they're going to do? He don't care because he don't live over it. Right, right. They set that program down. I want to say they fired me because I said they shut the program down and I spoke on social media. Because one of my kids was texting me and I was like, why they don't want us to come to the white no more. I'm like, I'm working on it, blah, it hurt me. You ain't got shit else to do. Excuse me. Okay. You good? All right, but you ain't got nothing to do. So I put it on social media and said, man, this hurt my heart about blah, but by me doing that, I violated the social media policy. Of course. So that was the grounds to fire me and then the program was already shut down. It's rather a little loophole on you. Oh my God. So what you are, are you still in contact with any of these kids or how do they live? I see them. I see them. The way it's not. So I see them. I see some of them out and about. But they, they went from when I known them 16, 90, 22, 23. So now you guys with the bags around them. And you will see them and you will almost see the same on their face. Like, ah. You know, like, ah, but they start, not, not that those kids, I'm thinking of, but they start stealing cars from there after that. Like, once you, once you took away why they were there, they steal in the neighborhood, you just took away their, where they could do something. That was a happy distraction. Yup. So they're still going to be doing so. They're going to focus and, and bam. So they start stealing cars and stuff up there. Now you police presence. Now y'all want to be model. So, um, we have other places that we're looking at to kind of land that program for right now. We're just moving it around. Because the kids kind of stick with us and leasing water in high school. You should be very proud of yourself, like, seriously. Father, tell me about Fatherhood. How are they looking? It changes every day. But you love it. You enjoy being a parent. I love my kids for sure. I'm talking about people. I love, I love my kids. I love my kids for sure. Cause it's, it's my reason for a lot of things. It's my reason to do a lot of things. If you take fatherhood away, if I wasn't a father, for one, I wouldn't still be in the city. I would have been left with all the, you know, I got hurt and it's all over the place. I would have left and just pursued whatever I wanted to do. Fatherhood grounded me here, which forced me to build here, which I'm thankful for. And I, you know, this generation, I'm trying to say this in a happy medium place. Sometimes when one has children, it, it grounds them. It makes them a better person. But on the flip side, cause I've been the social worker. Parents forget their parents and they turn it up. And they meet the kids wherever they are. And it's a very sad situation. So I do want to commend you for actually wanting to be a part of your children's lives. (applause) My father did use influential for me. So it's just, my grandfather was in his life. I came from men. Yeah, I came from a lineage of men. He was a pastor. He was a community activist. He was like, like, he did a lot. They all army, army people, my uncle. The one who got me an age back, I'm still close to. My father passed away, my grandfather's still living. But I came from strong black men. A lineage of strong black men who raised us on how to be strong black men. And so, for me to take that away from my children, I couldn't, I couldn't be that type of man. Yeah. That's a bomb drop there, boy. Yeah, sure. (applause) Yeah. That's a bomb drop there, boy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I heard a say that you are also a poet. Have you thought about maybe writing a book and getting a book out? Yeah. So I actually am three quarters of the way through my first book. So I want to write about my life experiences from a 10 year time span from when I was 20. I say from 18 to 28. So from the time that I first graduated school and started my adult life to 28 when I went to the Y. So that's the book it's about. It's called The Thoughts of a Fallen Nation. Okay. Okay. All right. (applause) Doing your writing time. I mean, was it, did you start writing when you had a lot of downtime to yourself or was it something that you'd been, you know, fascinated with all your life? No, I started when I was home this, bro. Okay. Okay. Yeah. I want to have been, um, so I guess a little bit more background. I was in the church from 19 to maybe 22. Okay. In the church heavy, like, trying to change my life because I got, I had a rough upbringing childhood while. Okay. All right. So, um, I went to escape. I wanted to escape the life that I knew and I found peace in Christ when I first went. So I was there and, um, I went through the whole of junior, deacon, deacon, minister. I was actually, you know, like preaching and like, you know, messages and stuff like that. Right. So I was doing that. And when I was earlier this, I got married. So, you know, just trying to live according to the scriptures. And, um, I was in, I did it for a while. And then things were left after I got married, everything went down here. Maybe somebody that I knew for like two months, like a month or two. Oh man. She was in there. That wasn't even script on with you. It wasn't. It was terrible. Yeah. I, I didn't want to, but man. It was, it was, I was encouraged to, because I went to a really strict old school type church. You know, so when I was in it, I got encouraged to do it. I did it. Um, I was taught that, you know, gotta make everything okay. You work it out. So, and that's how I took it until I started realizing like, no, this ain't right. This girl ain't moving on, she's supposed to move. This ain't got to do without them red. Like I'm flipping. Right. Man, I'm flipping scriptures. I'm like this ain't it. I'm using every script. You're mad at the book now. You lied to me. It got to a point where I couldn't take it no more. And I broke. And when I broke, um, I left the church because they were still trying to get me to be a certain kind of way. I'm like, man, I can't do this because this ain't right. And then, uh, because I broke and this ain't good, but I started, you know, started to cope with how I feel 'cause I was hurt. Yeah. You know, so I started drinking again, like, you know, drinking a little bit when I was a kid. But like, this me as an adult now. So now I'm really drinking. Now I'm really smoking. Now I'm really, you know, I'm living my adult life later than that. Yeah. So as I'm doing this, I still want to be doubling back to be at kids at that point. But now I'm a whole different man. I'm out here dealing with every woman I can think of. Like, I'm just living wild. And I'm realizing that me living like this, everybody's cool. I ain't going through nearly the fights that I'm going through, the arguments I'm going through, my dinner is made, my lunches packed, the house is clean, the kids is cool. And I'm out here living wild and reckless. But at this point, I'm so careless in my heart that it ain't no loving you no more when they come to that. Yeah. So when I start moving around and I start just dealing through life, I'm going down, like, going through whatever I get from college depression and whatever. That's what they say. At the time, you know, I ain't thinking I'm depressed. I'm living life. Now they do. So I'm drinking and I'm making ends meet. I'm making ends meet already at this point. So because I'm living like that, everything is just rough. But I need the outlet. So my younger brother, he sings. So he's singing, you know, him and he's singing my little cousin rapping. They trying to do music. I'm trying to sell it. So they doing that. And while I'm hearing them listening to them, beats is playing and they freaked out and it's happening over and over again after a while. I need to get it out for myself. I'm not no rapper. So the beat is playing and I feel how I feel. So I start putting, taking out my phone and typing it first and then writing it. After a while, I start realizing that the stuff I'm writing is halfway decent. And still didn't take a series. Whenever I get on my feet, I stop writing. Whenever I'm doing something else, writing goes away. Oh, okay, gotcha. Even when I was in the hospital, it's me. I write when I'm hurting. Like when I feel it. That's my pain. I don't really write happy because I'm happy. I'm good. And I don't even think I get really get happy like that. Like, you know, I ain't never been just ecstatic. But when I'm hurting, that's my outlet. So what's your relationship now with God or spiritual? I still believe in it. Like my belief system really never changed. Still got a way to go to get back to where I wanted to be or where I was. But, you know, still pray here and there. But I'm nowhere near the same. That's what enhanced the turn falling angel window in a book. I fell away from who I was. And my journey to get back and to being a better person is what I've been on. So the stuff that you see and the stuff that you hear about, the positive stuff, that's all me, you know, letting my character shine. This is who I am. But as far as me really being in Christ like I was, you know, still got a journey. Still got to keep going. I encourage you to keep living because as long as you can say to have breath in your body, man, it's going to, it's a second chance for everything. So I'm really proud of you. And one of the things about your walk with God is the fact that you can acknowledge. Hey, I'm broken. I'm a right when I feel it, but that's the point of faith. You know, like, if everything going good, why would you have faith? Right, right. You know, I just, I, I pray you get on whatever route that you're going on. Right, right. Yeah. For sure. So it's definitely something that's in my heart. Every time I, you know, you stay too far away, you feel it. You feel like you're going a little bit too far. You're doing too much. And then I got to the point where I'm living such a clean, tough life. You don't think about it as much. And it's just because of the comparison. I'm not doing what I used to do. So you don't think it's that bad. But why are you living this life? It's a time of reflection because it could have went to the left, though. You know, and then you have your children right now according to you. They're doing good health wise. And like somebody got to get that golly. You know, I mean, appreciation or homework or how you want to call it. Yeah, because some kids are looking up to you. That's what the kids do. They emulate what their parents do. So it's like what they going to see with mommy and daddy doing. Is mommy and daddy on the same page? Of course, when it comes to that spiritual thing, you know, I got to connect somehow. For sure. So I'm just proud of you. Thank you, Lou. I appreciate it. So would you mind giving me, well, I like to hear the piece that you did at this, at the, uh... You don't have me crying over there. Yeah, I just want to hear it. You want to hear it now? Yes, yes. I want to hear it. Alright, guys. Peace call. It calls letter to my soul or letters of my soul. Y'all ready? Yeah, go for it, buddy. Alright. It's hard to hear a cry for help. Feeling helpless to help her. She made me want to cry myself. But that would be selfish. She needs me calm, cool, collected. So I'm taking deep breaths to comprise myself. And I just hold it in. God, help me. Cover my baby. And forgive us of our sins. I hope it's not too late to pray. I've been sending every day, but I pray today that I can make amends. Please ease our mind. Offer your protection. Clear the infection and speed up the time. Let her lungs drain with minimum pain. And remember your serving one more time. 'Cause every time she screams my name, her words pass through my thoughts down to my soul and I can feel her pain. Now I'm sitting reflecting about my direction. And it's time to make a change. So I ain't got time to play. I've been working every day trying to build a business while exchanging my time for pain. But now I'm face to face with the reality that a guy can come take my time away. And I got kids to feed. I've been focused on the financials, but it's other things that they need. And if I'm always going TV's tablets and phones or what they're going to use to water my seeds, or here lies the challenge. If I'm meant to provide in the world's eyes and there's really room for balance, I'm forced to spare my life as a paid slave rather than for me to nurture their talents, knowing that they need me. Tired of work, man, the reason that they can't see me. The life of a boss. Write down my thoughts. So that one day if they straighten, they'll believe me. And I slave for them. Up early mornings and late nights to get paid for them. Stand out of debt while trying to invest. And building up what I save for them. So when I pass away, my children can live off of what I stashed away. But I know now I need this income to be passive because I ain't got no cash today. So it's like I sold my child holding her hand full enough fever. I plan to be here for a while. She's hurting and I won't leave her. I'm making a vow through the sounds of her struggling through her breathing. Praying to my God that you release them. (Applause) I told you, boy. That's the two, Jerker. Yeah. Wow. And that's the thing about poetry. When you deliver your piece, however that looks, it's supposed to put people in that headspace. Right. Right. Right. You won't come by. Come on. Well, I didn't want to catch you while you was talking, but okay. (Applause) But I think you should frame that and once you get older, it'll do two things. Obviously it's going to take her to the headspace of where she was when she was at that. Right. Right. And it's an homage to us. No, I'm for sure. It's definitely going to be in the book. Right. I told myself I got seven chapters, seven poems, and seven scriptures that are all being a book. Okay. But yeah. Okay. That's what I want to hear. (Applause) I think that every young man who has an opportunity to look back on his life and see where he made a conscious decision to make a change in his life. Should at least have a memoir or something to leave him back for his children to say, you know, at one point you will struggle. But at one point you will come out of it because I got a saying, if you ain't never struggled in life, you ain't lived. You know, wait a minute, I forgot that. (Applause) You ain't never struggled. It's life. You ain't really lived, you know, because it's a part of life. It's a part of life. If you ain't don't know where to grow from, you'll never grow. You know, so, again, commend you on everything that you've done. And I'm quite sure that V Queen is over there itching to give you the high cools that she wrote to you on. (Laughter) Yeah. I'm going to pass it over to you, Queen. So, this show is called a high-cool hour. Are you familiar with high-cools? (Inaudible) Okay. Okay. All right. Here we go. Ahem. Legacy completed. Okay. All right. So, I'm going to pass it over here. (Laughter) Yeah. I'm going to pass it over here. (Inaudible) I'm going to pass it over here. (Inaudible) Okay. Okay. I'm going to pass it over here. Okay. I'm going to pass it over here. Okay. I'm going to pass it over here. Okay. Legacy completed. Paving the way for your kids. Lead by example. (Applause) Legacy completed. Paving the way for your kids. Lead by example. So, the next one says, "Mintering youth males. Building wealth. Or owing debt. Making each day count." (Applause) So, just a culmination of everything you said. All you been through. The mentoring. The fact that you got young males involved. Either you guys are going to build the wealth or you're going to owe debt. Either we're going to live or either we're going to exist. What we're going to do. And I love how you have a huge chapter in your life. How you're just showing it. And I don't know the age of your children, but as they grow, they're going to see that. Lead by example. You have children. Now you have a legacy. What are we going to do with these legacies? You know. So, just as you can teach these young men in the streets. I'm pretty sure that what you have in that home is just as much impactful. You should be proud of yourself. (Applause) How do you know? I try to teach my kids. I try to teach my kids about business. And they do. They do not care. (Laughter) I got a 12-year-old and a 9-year-old right now. I got babies after that. I have a 12-year-old now. I've been trying to teach them for the longest. They pick up some of it, but they want to go play-wise TV. I want to go get this again. And I'll be back. It's important. I'll be really trying to stress the thing. I'm a man. They do not be current. I told myself, I know I need to build up to the point where they don't have to work. Because they won't have to struggle like I struggle. I came from struggling, so I don't know nothing else. I'm a little struggling, but I hear what you're saying. You just want to play the way you don't want them to. For my girls, for my girls at least, my son, I feel like he's going to have to struggle just to become a man. I feel like a man that doesn't struggle. To piggyback off what you said, I believe that a man that doesn't struggle isn't a man. Right. Because it's a live. Yeah, because how do you gain strength? Correct. How do you gain strength if you haven't been through any type of adversity? Correct. Correct. So that's for my son, he has to. For my daughters, I'm going to teach you how a man is supposed to treat you as best as I can. And hopefully you find a man that will treat you the same. Right. Well, I shot you this time. This time I got a couple I want to throw out. Yeah. Okay. Stand on your morals. Never give in to the masses. Just stand on your word. Stand on your mouth. Never give in to the masses. Just stand on your word. Don't leave stones unturned. Today may be your last day. Apologize now. Don't leave stories unturned. Today may be your last day. Apologize. [Applause] All right, big one. No. [Laughter] What do you think about, you know, because what we want to do, of course we want to make you feel welcome. You should be proud of the life that you're living. I mean, rough through it all. You are a testimony, and I really pray you get it. I don't want to say get back to where you were spiritually, but I pray that you elevate and incorporate more. All right. It's still there. When I say, I think because I came from preaching, that's the, it's going to be a big gap. You know, because like, no, I'm not nowhere near that. I ain't standing up in front of nobody quoting him no more. At least I ain't trying to. Right, right. So that's where it is for me. But as far as like the principles, the morals, as far as what I actually stand on and what, like that's still there. I don't think that really leads you because that's what you measure yourself on. I think you are a great outreach. I don't, I don't want to call it a pastor, but whatever you do outreach in the community, I think you should definitely stick to that. I'm a young, I'm a young graduate. I'm a young black man and I feel like that's taken for granted. Like, young black men used to be, uh, celebrated for being that, like, but being a young black man used to be something. Yeah, yeah. Like a stand up, a stand up man, your principles and your morals. You've learned that from your parents when you was a kid. Yeah. So I get that in a time that we live in. We give kudos to the people that's doing what they're supposed to do. The way I look at it, that's what I'm built for. That's what I'm made for. Like, my parents, like, my father, my father and my grandfather were stand up men. Like, they took care of their responsibilities because of how they would look at it or whatever. It's like, no, I'm a man first. Right. So, uh, yeah, excuse me, young men, be a man first. Um, the extra stuff, I don't need kudos for being a man. Me taking care of my kids. I'm a man first. Me taking care of my responsibilities. I'm a man first. Me, however I'm moving, that's just what it's supposed to be. It's not really a celebratory thing. Right. Now, some things that I'd be ecstatic about, like, um, I'm working on this event space. Like, that's a big deal for me, I mean, I'm excited. We're in this phase out. It's a 918 little bone. That's hard work that's okay across the board. Me and themselves may not necessarily be doing that. So that's the type of stuff that I say, okay, this is where I'm really pushing and what I'm building right now for people to come out, rent the space. It's a great piece of property right off the highway, man. It's office 70. When you come into the city, it's one of those bigger, it's one of the properties that we not really supposed to have. Right. Okay. So, and it was a construction office when I first came in. A construction office that got run down because of weather. And then the owner is another young black man, older than I am, but young black man. Right. He brought me on to help him rebuild the property because he had a vision for the actual property itself. So by bringing me on, I got a different vision than you got because I got different experiences. So I was able to bring in revenue streams inside the property to where now you ain't sitting in like, you know, if anybody got commercial properties, they know, even if it's residential properties. If you sit on that property, it ain't nothing happening. You lose the money fast. Right. So you got to check, check since you got whatever bills that's coming with it. And if it's vacant, then you got homeless people that's going to come in the movement. You got so much stuff that you got to worry about. So it was a, it's a money pit for a lot of people. And I was able to come in and instead of making the money pit, we eight months in since I really switched gears. We eight months in and now that man has, like he on salary just for doing that. He got salary now that comes every week. Wow. You're getting paid where, what was a money pit is now profitable for him. And then I got a couple of other companies that's inside of the actual building now. So it's like, just building that and building real generational wealth. I'm a real estate guy at heart. That's what I do. (applause) Because of my experiences before, I have a knack to find them. I can find money. You give me a building. I can find a way to make money out of it. I can find money. That's what it is. Because that's what I did before. If you have a property, I can find a way to make money out of it. It ain't nothing but it's all the same stuff. You know, it's some out there. I can, you know, some, I can make money out of it in general. And then by me being on this side of the table, we go through all the legal processes that we have to go through to make it make sense. So even if the building ain't all the way up to where it's supposed to go. Okay, well we can get by with these loopholes over here for right now until we can get there. So I'm more excited about stuff like that. As far as me, family kids, that's what we supposed to do. Right. Well, I made sure that I got the clocks together now. So tell us how, tell, tell everybody how they can get in touch with, if they want to get some information from. Right. You want to get in touch with me directly. You can follow me on Ace in Action. 3-1-4. That's on Instagram. Ace in Action. 3-1-4. The actual, the Instagram for the event space that I keep referring to is Ariel. It's A-E-D-I-E-D-L. And we have an open mic every Thursday. It's at 918 LaBone Avenue. It's open mic every Thursday to where we're going to let people sing, do comedy. We're about to open up another Friday and I got a rooftop deck up there. So you can follow the event page to see whatever we got going on there. No, right. It's an acronym. It's an acronym. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I'm glad that V Queen got you to come down and share your story with us more than likely we'll be more than happy to have you back again. But it's on you, honey, we got to cut it off. Well, once again, Ray, thank you for being in front of our show. Thank you. Join us next week. We have another special guest and in the meantime, I'm V Queen. I'm Casmo. And this is the high quo. Wow, see you guys. Imagine no conflict in that rock. I ran up and down the street. No noise to take out your yard. Imagine our children being born in court. Then they were lying on a gun. Imagine. Imagine the base. Stop that damn base. Stop that. Kill that. Man. White key. Stop that. Church in school. Then they just get taken in. Imagine. Imagine. Imagine the key was never a kid. And it is to fulfill the dream. Dream