The following podcast is a dear media production. She had some burning questions. Oh, we need the Zane and Alicia to you. You think you can't say yes or no? Remy, being in a relationship, how do you deal with people flirting with you? Like, thank you, but I'm engaged. I'm engaged, but you can buy a herd, right? I don't think being pregnant sounds funny either. I can't wait to be like, babe, go get me tickles. Yeah, you're gonna have the craziest food combo. School-isha. (laughs) (upbeat music) - Pretty basic. - Hey guys, what's up? Welcome back to Pretty Basic. I'm your co-host, Remy Cruz. And I'm your other co-host, Alicia Marie. And we are in the studio. We're in the studio. I'm wrapped up and I'm nice and warm and comfy. Well, I saw you looking all comfy and I decided I'm gonna put my feet up. And yes, yeah, kick 'em up. I'm wearing shoes. They're on the chair. I mean, it's your chair, so you can do whatever you want to your chair. Exactly. And no judgment. It's a no judgment zone. I just, it just sucks to put so much effort into an out, not even so much. I just threw this together. (laughs) It's just like, you know, I wanna be comfy, but. It completely looks a look. It really does. I understand. It is like, Chloe Kardashian would literally be like, yeah, getting if she saw this. Yeah, I mean, it's your chair though. So you can do what you want. Yeah, I'm sorry for TMI, but I'm on my period today. Wait, I'm on my period. I know we're cycle sisters, but I'm like, my cramps are hurting so badly. And I hate it, but it's also, having a regular period is something that I've wanted for my whole life. And here you are. It's such a beautiful thing. And also such a sad thing also. No, I'm so curious if we have any other cycle sissies. Let us know. Are we all in our luteal phase? They're just kidding. I'm still trying to learn all the phases. I think it's really cool that everyone's being so open and talking about those things now. And, you know, it used to be like, something hush hush and a little taboo to speak about. Now I'm like, I mean, I meant strating. Well, I feel like again, no baby this month, it's a men problem. They don't want to hear about it. So they made it like weird to talk about. Yeah, we all go through it. It's normal, it's life. They just constantly dragging men for no reason. For reason. For reason. For reason. That one is understandable. I think it's fine to talk about, I won't go into the dirty details, but you know what else doesn't talk to the entire egg freezing. Oh, another thing. You think people don't talk about it? I just feel like a lot more people are doing it now, which is amazing. Now they are, but I feel like that's another thing. I've had a lot of friends in my life talking about it. Like should they do it, debating it, obviously turning 30, like that's a new era to think of. Oh my God, speaking of turning 30 today is my half birth day. Oh my God, you're right. Which means I have exactly, what is that? 130. Nope. Definitely more than that. 180 something days until I am. You're half birthday. If you, I am facing out right now, I'm sorry. My half birthday, I'm a half birthday celebrator. Are you? I'm not my, I think my half birthday is in October, October 5th. October 5th? Yeah. Good to know. Growing up, I was a half birth, I am a half birthday celebrator. I'd get half a cake, I'd get presents. Really? Yeah, my family would go all out on half birthdays. My mom would bring me lunch to school. Wait, what am I half birthday? The fact that, how? How did she know? That wouldn't, no, 'cause it was summer. She'd bring me lunch wherever I was. I just can't think of how many years we've been friends. And now I'm realizing that every August 7th, you've been waiting for me to like do something. Actually, my mom's gonna correct me. I'm, no, no, no, I don't expect it. I was in school because I was on a year round schedule. So she did bring me lunch. I did remember correctly. I love a half birthday, but more than that, I'm just like, wow, it's six months until I'm done with my 20s. That's kind of feeling like a little emo about it. It's funny also because up until this day, truly, I've been like, oh, I'm like, not even 29 and a half yet. I'm not 29 and a half. I don't even need to think about it. Now, I'm like, I'm 29 and a half. Now I have to think about it. Six more months. I mean, technically you don't have to. I don't have to, but I want to. But honestly, again, and I know I say this a lot, like 30s are amazing. I know. And I'm like, it's not that I'm not excited to be 30. I think that I am very excited, but the same time, I'm like sad that my 20s will be behind me and I will never be in that chapter again. But here's the thing. You're gonna look back and be like, I'm so glad I'm not in my 20s anymore. - Really? Do you feel that way? - Yeah, because it's just like the confidence that comes. Oh my God, you want to know the best analogy I can think of? Literally, when you turn 30, it's like all this emotus 'cause you're like, I'm not gonna be in my 20s anymore. Like, oh, it's so sad. Like this part of me's gone, blah, blah, blah. But then you like, it happens and you realize it's not bad. If not, it's better. And you remember that? One of my favorite movies is The Proposal for anyone listening, Obsessed. Sandra Bullock loved her since Miss Congeniality. You still have yet to see it, right? Miss Congeniality, yeah, I haven't seen it. - Had I seen it to the list? - I know, we have an ongoing list of movies that I need to see that I haven't seen. Those ones that were both like, you haven't seen this. Which I also just found out recently that Remy hasn't seen Pirates of the Caribbean. - I feel like that one's not that crazy. I feel like a lot of people haven't seen that one. - Well, they're not crazy to you because you haven't seen them. - I know they were popular, but I feel like not. Like, has anybody here seen Pirates of the Caribbean? - Yeah, everybody. - Everyone's seen it. - I thought it was like super normal to not see it. - No, no, no. Anyway, Miss Congeniality, Sandra Bullock obsessed. Ryan Reynolds, we know I love him, obsessed with him. The movie, The Proposal. You know, at the end, this is not really a spoiler, but like, it is, but it's fine. It's an old movie. - It's 10 years older, fine. - If it's past 10 years, no spoiler, it's needed. - If it's past like four years, I think it's okay. - So the Betty White, R.I.P, Rest in Peace. - She's the gram on it. And then like, at one point, there's like the health scare and they're in the helicopter trying to like, save her and bring her to the hospital. And she's like, ah, this must be my end. Like, goodbye, I love you all. And like, crosses her arms and lays down. That is you leaving your 20s. You're like, oh, this is how it's gonna be when I turn 30. And then instantly she goes down and she goes, well, I guess I'm fine. Like, that is the epitome of turning 30 because you're like, it's this big lead up. You're like, ah, I'm gonna be old, I'm gonna be withered. I'm gonna be like, ah, I can't go on anymore. Like, I don't know, like, okay, the end of my life. Here it is. And then you close your eyes for two seconds and then you wake up and realize, oh. - It's just another day. - That is another day. - That's so true. And it is, I mean, it's society that puts the pressures on us that like, in your 30s, like you need to do all these things in your 20s, 30s is old, blah, blah, blah. Like, it's really just another day and I'm aware of that. It's like, when you turn on your birthday, people are like, do you feel older? You're like, no, it's another day. So I know it's going to be like that. I think I'm just nostalgic for my 20s. - You feel like I was gonna be in my 20s my whole life. You know what I mean? Like, that's what I felt like it was such a long time. I don't even remember being like 19 and younger as much as I remember all of my 20s. I don't know why. - I mean, it was a while ago. - But I also have PCOS and a bad memory, but literally bad memory over here. - Oh, speaking of PCOS, I got my MRI done finally. - Wait, oh my God. - I'll make it like a really quick little snippet. - You like mentioned it to me in person, but you honestly didn't, we didn't talk much about it. - There wasn't much to say other than thank you so much to everybody. I talked openly about how I have assisted my brain because I have PCOS. So I've been looking to get an MRI done. I had a bad experience a few months ago. And so I was trying to get one done, but I have claustrophobia. And a lot of PB listeners told me to get an open MRI. The PB listeners are so nice and supportive. I just have to say you guys are so nice. - They're so nice, so sweet. - So cute. - Gorgeous. - Gorgeous. - Smart. - Smart. Knowledgeable. - Women and STEM. - They knew about an open MRI. So they told me to get an open MRI, which it's like the MRI machines are obviously enclosed. So for those of you who have claustrophobia, it's your worst nightmare. And so I got an open MRI recently. I waited. It was like a really long time to get the appointment and everything. Here's the heads up. If you are like me and you're scared to get an MRI and you have something in your brain, you're out of luck. Let me just say, because my, my cyst is in my brain, even in the open MRI, they had to put my head in the cage still. - That makes sense. - Yeah, I should have thought that. So. - I'm sure it was still better than right? - No, it was exactly the same. - Oh. - 'Cause I closed my eyes regardless, so. - You're like, all I saw was black. - It was all the same eyes. - I was dressed. - Oh my God. It was, it was, it was the exact same experience honestly, but, 'cause you're still like inside a tube. - Yeah. - It's just the tube is a little skinnier than it's a little bit less wide. - Like your body is still in a machine. I mean, thank you so much for the suggestions. And if anybody's looking to get an MRI and you're claustrophobic and your, your ailment is not in your brain, I highly recommend it. And the guy was so nice. He was so worth every penny because he was so sweet to me. And I was like freaking out. He could tell he was so nice, but I got it and I'm done. So that's fantastic. - And when, when do you get results? - I don't know. I'm like scared to find out, to be honest, 'cause I'm like, what am I thinking about that? - Well, as long as it hasn't changed, 'cause I remember they weren't too worried about it before. - I know, we'll see. I'm hoping. - Optimistic RAM. Okay, but enough about me. How have you been? - Honestly, I've been knock on wood. - Knock on wood, knock it. - I've been great. - Good. - Like I feel I have a really good knock on wood. Universe, please don't change it. - I think great. And I'm happy with how everything is. You know, could everything be better a little bit? Yes, but at the same time, I feel really good balance wise. Like work's been good. I feel like I've had a good social life. You know, energy's been better than it was for sure. - Uh, yeah, good. I think it's so important to appreciate even though, even if like nothing crazy good is going on, nothing crazy bad is going on. So appreciate that. - And that's what your 30s are. Instead of being like, I forgot what we're talking about that for so many. - Instead of being like, oh my God, how could something horrible happen? You're like, oh my God, everything's good. Like you appreciate it more 'cause you've been through some stuff. - You've seen some things. - Yeah. - That's okay. I'm like, I'm not necessarily freaking out. I'm really, really not. I'm just like, the countdown is on. - It's happening. - Half birthday. - Half birthday. - I'm so curious what everyone else's half birthday is. - That's the comment of the time. - It's down below once you're half birthday. - Wait, so just-- - If you don't know, it's exactly six months from your real birthday. - What is October 5th in the zodiac world? - That would be, I believe, a Virgo or a Libra. I'm not sure when the-- - Wait, if that's a Libra, that'd be crazy 'cause my moon and my rising are both Libra. - Libra. - Wait, so like, is that a coincidence? - Oh, it's just a coincidence. It is. - It's not for everybody. Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Wait, I'm like, is that a coincidence? - It's just a coincidence. - Wait, it's just chance, balance. And I mentioned balance, too. - Wait, is that a thing? - No, but mine's August 7th, which I'm, that's a Leo. - Leo. - And I'm a Leo rising. I think it's just a coincidental thing, but that is, we're also-- - But also-- - But also, two or-- - One, he-he, two, not a coincidental. - If I had a nickel, we're so soulmate. You know what else is new? I unintentionally, intentionally goes to my therapist. I didn't mean to. I didn't mean to, I just got really busy. And then, she texts me, and I forgot to reply, and then she texts me again. She was like, hey, no worries, but these are the last few days because I'm gonna be gone for a month. So she's gone for a month. - Oh, no. - So now I haven't seen her for like two months. - Are you gonna, did you make an appointment? - Well, she's not back to like next month, I think. - You know what? - Make your appointment now for when she gets back, get back on a weekly schedule. - You're so right. - That is self-care, if I've ever heard anything. - No, I know. - But I don't care. - It's just funny 'cause I feel like I always online. I'm like, everyone needs to be in therapy and like, make sure to be in it. Like, da, da, da, da, da. And here I am being like, what, ghost in life? - Life gets crazy though. I feel that too. Like, I really want to prioritize it. And then sometimes it just, my schedule doesn't allow. - Yeah. - But it's something that we should definitely prioritize. You know what another form of self-care is that I always say, hmm, when you're going out for the night before you leave, leaving a water bottle by your bedside, and/or having your snacks ready, and/or getting something, we've said, ordering something from to go to your house as you're going home from the bar, or ordering it before you go out so it's home when you get home from the bar. - It's just preparation, you know? - It's being prepared, it's being ahead, I agree. - Being organized. - Mm-hmm. - And my favorite thing ever, especially, oh my God, especially if I'm out. Even, you know, we went to Disneyland not too long ago, but my shower when I came back, oh, it was the best. - Oh, I was looking forward to that all day. - I was so nasty, I was so sweaty, I was so gross, I feel like I hugged so many people, I feel like there was just like a lot, and I-- - It was like 90 degrees also. - And it was burning, and I was just, the second, I barely said hi to Ashley, I go, "Hi, I'm gonna go take a shower." Like, I literally, in one breath, was like, I'm going upstairs to take a shower. I took the longest shower, I did an everything shower. - Ooh, I love an everything. - Everything. - You know, for who? Myself, good. I did it for myself, as you should. It wasn't for anyone, it was for me. Like, I wanted to feel good, I wanted to take my time. Also, it's a good time to like decompress, and like, you think, do you ever have like shower thoughts? The way that I only have my best thoughts in the shower, personally, for me, I always think of really good comebacks to either jokes I should've said on this podcast, or conversations, or if I'm like in an argument, I'm like, I should've said this instead. Okay, you wanna know some science behind it? - I saw this on TikTok, so obviously it's so real. It's something about the water hitting your head. It like, stimulates, like, the brain. - The brain or something like that? - Interesting. - Or you also know how when you go on a walk, or you're driving, you get your best thoughts. It's because you're doing something else while you're thinking, versus just sitting on a couch like this, we do every week. - Really? - Yeah, it's like, it helps you think it through better. - Next time, so we're just on walking pads. - Oh my God, we should have walking pads. - That's a really great, that makes sense to me. - Yeah, so, and then I just remember seeing something about the water hitting your scalp. Helps stimulate something, blood flow, blah, blah, blah. I don't know, I'm probably wrong, but it made sense to me, and then it made me wonder, so if I go walk in the rain, am I gonna have amazing ideas? - That is a good, you should try next time. - Yeah. - And let me know, but something that has been working for me, which I am obsessed with. - Tell us more. - If you're watching the video, you may notice we have two beautiful stunning, stunning, the Dove serum shower collection. You guys, this is the hydration boost, and it's fantastic. It's got like a creamy, really nice moisturizing lather, which is so fantastic. The Dove hydration boost is formulated with 6% hydrating serum with hyaluronic acid. And this is amazing because it takes your skin from dry to dewy for 24 hours of silky softness. - That's what I'm saying, Remy. - Like my skin is so dry, like the dryness forms almost like a web. - Yes, when you use this though, it goes away, I promise. Overall, the collection is absolutely amazing. I feel like there's something for absolutely everyone, and it's also really cool because it's co-created with dermatologists and beauty experts. - Another thing that I love about it is that it's paraben and sulfate-free. And it's also plant-based, and Dove is the number one dermatologist-recommended body wash brand. I was doing some research on the hydration boost, and four in five women say that it actually restores dehydrated skin within a week. - We love this. So if you haven't already tried it out, go try out Dove's new serum shower collection. They're seriously something for everyone, and we absolutely love it. Speaking of hydration- - I was gonna love. - We should get some burning questions. - I love, ooh, some hot questions. We need to cool them down. - All right, I am really excited because I put it on the pretty basic Instagram that you guys should ask us some of your burning questions. We have not done an episode like this in a minute. I know, I'm a little nervous. - Well, I was just thinking, I was like, you know, we need- - Get them what they want. - We need to give the girlies what they want. - I mean, what's the juicy level would you say? - Oh, this is like a mild. - Okay, we're just going like mild, you know? These aren't necessarily like burning questions. We've avoided actually, some of them maybe. - I'm excited though. I love a Q&A personally. I feel like Q&As always are just like so fun 'cause people get to know us a little bit more. - Also, it's weird because like in my head, I still am like, oh, is this interesting? Do people want to know this? But seeing someone else ask about it, I'm like, oh, like they actually do want to know. - So if you ask me the same question today, versus three months ago, six months ago, a year ago, like my thoughts might have changed a thousand percent. - If anybody cares about what my thoughts are. - All right, the first one, we'll have these anonymous because most of the people ask for it to be anonymous. - Oh, okay. - Three years into a relationship, how do you avoid the boring normalcy of being with someone so long? - I personally don't feel bored with Cal. Like I get so excited for a car drive together still or like something, even when we go on vacation, I'm like, I get so excited to go on vacation, even if we like are going somewhere close or even if we're like doing something monotonous or mundane, like I really still, I get so excited just to be with him. So I just want to put that out there. I'm not saying that like, if you don't feel that you're not in the right relationship, but that's just something that I personally feel with him, which makes me feel like I'm with the right person a lot of the times. But obviously life can't get boring, living with someone like it can get monotonous and can get very normal. - So I would say, if you ever feel that way, I think keeping things like fun, like going, you should always be dating your partner. No matter how long you've been together, going on dates is very important, having a loan time is very important, having private time, all those sorts of things are very important. So I think if you feel like you've lost the spark, I think it's different than feeling a little bit bored of monotony. Like those are two very different things to me. You know what I mean? I feel like people might mistake one for the other too. - I never realized that until now, 'cause I do, like obviously the fairy tale honeymoon stage dies down. That's very normal. Some people's last a lot longer than others, some people's don't, but in the end, it's gonna go down eventually, you know? But yeah, the difference between like the spark, or I guess also, it does say a lot. - It's just very situational. Also like Kalanay, I would say, have a really long honeymoon stage. And then there was definitely a time where we were out of it, but I feel like it got re-brought up again during this like engagement wedding planning time. So I think it just goes in ebbs and flows. Yeah, there are definitely times where we're both also so busy. We don't even have time to see each other. Like then it starts to get boring in that sense, where I feel like I'm just going to bed and I'm like, we didn't even see each other for today. It just goes in ebbs and flows. But I think like your gut always knows if it's right or not. - Also, I do like how you said, it doesn't mean you're necessarily in the wrong relationship. 'Cause I do think it is normal to like, get out of that honeymoon stage and you're like, oh, also, I mean, I'm assuming you also might mean sexually. I heard this on the skinny confidential, obsessed. - I haven't tried it yet, but I'm like, oh my God. Yes, it was saying like if you and your partner want to try some more like crazy things in the bedroom to just simply turn the lights red and it gives you like permission. It makes it feel like you can to go to, to like crazy, try crazy, you're like positions are like any like fun, like stuff that you're like, - Oh, they turn their lights red and then they know that they're going to do things or. - No, it's just like something about the human brain makes it feel like, oh, I can, it makes it feel like they can try different things because of the red lighting. - Okay, and I'm like, when I see that. - I know people that turn it on red and that means that they're like, I want to have sex. Do you want to have sex? Like a like a notification of, of that way, of that way. - Okay, let my assistant text you. - Alexa, turn lights red at home. - You're, wait, you're looking at them dead in the eye. Okay, Google, turn lights red. - No, but I think it was a doctor or something that. - I believe that. - Michael and Lauren had on and I was like, oh my God, I feel like so many couples want to try things but they don't want to be the ones and be like, - You would do like, acne, face mask, red lights, I'm like, oh, I love that. - I love that. - That's cool. I think that's a fun little tip. - I think like, whether we're talking about sex or not, just you should continue to date your partner always. - I feel like you're really good with that. You'll be like, oh, look, we have date night tonight. And even though you quote, can reschedule, it's important to prioritize it. - So now I really try my best and it's been really great for our relationship. - I love that. - Thank you so much and I love your red lights and I'll let you know how to go. - Red light therapy. - Summer is finally here and I have a lot of friends who have birthdays during the summer. I'm taking a girls trip to San Diego with a few of my friends and I already have a checklist of what I need. We also need something to keep us entertained for the two hour drive from LA to San Diego. If you guys know me, I like to plan and pack in advance but we all know Remy does that even more. I'm pretty sure Susan green that in her. But I personally can say as an adult, I appreciate it so much more because I used to never be ahead with packing. Speaking of packing, a few things that I have in my bag are sunscreen, emotional support, water bottle and a steamy beach read. It's been a long time since I've just sat and read a physical book. I feel like lately I've been loving an audio book. And this year there's a new kind of essential that's right at your fingertips. If you have never heard of dipsy, dipsy is an app full of hundreds of short spicy audio stories. They're a woman led team of writers, producers and engineers who are obsessed with making the very best audio romance. On the app you can discover stories about second chance romances, adventurous vacation blings and hot and heavy hookups. They bring scenarios to life with immersive soundscapes and realistic characters. There's also a category on dipsy. If you wanna hear a narration, let's say in a British accent. If you love a good British accent, they have that. Dipsy offers a modern approach to romance through high quality and captivating audio fiction. There's a growing library of fantasy series with werewolves, Greek gods and goddesses, Regency era historical fiction and very smart to explore the bounds of your pleasure. New content is released every week. So in between listening to your favorite stories, again and again, you can always find something new to explore. On the app, I love how easy it is to find a story. It also breaks it down to so many different categories like top audio books, to top characters and many more. I know you'll find a story you'll be obsessed with. For listeners of the show, dipsy is offering an extended 30 day free trial when you go to dipsystories.com/prettybasic. That's 30 days of full access for free when you go to D-I-P-S-E-A stories.com/prettybasic. - D-I-P-S-E stories.com/prettybasic. - Anonymous advice for the Duff of the Friend group. I'm 20 and would appreciate your help. - Do you remember the Duff movie? - I remember the Duff movie. Duff stands for quote designated ugly fat friend. - Oh my God. - I always felt like the Duff growing up for sure. - Hate how like it's a thing. - I, first of all, agree with that. - Sorry, I don't think it's a thing because I didn't realize it was a thing until that movie came out and I was like, "Yeah, that's why the movie was so problematic." - I know 'cause I was like, one, I don't agree with this, too. - Also, she wasn't even fat. Like, I think it was also fun. There's a, I feel like, "Yeah, yeah." Some movies, I'm like, "Ooh." - I was always the girl growing up where guys would be like, "Your friend's really hot." Like, you know, talking to you through your friends or, you know, being nice to you because they think your friends are cute. Like, 'cause they wanna get with your friend. I, so I've always felt that. But if your friends are like making you feel, again, I don't think Duff is like a thing. Like it's, if your friends are saying that you are or like making you feel that way, that's an issue. But if you just, 'cause I never had my friends be like, "Oh, you're, you're the one who's that friend." Exactly, you're like, "No, no friends are ever making me feel that way." Or like, verbally, like saying that. It was always just like a thing that I couldn't ignore. - I'm thinking like, my first instinct is like, get new friends. But also, I'm aware that like, if the friends aren't putting that on you, maybe you have internalized that yourself as like giving yourself that label. - That's what I was trying to say, yeah. - I think that is a separate problem. I do think if, like you were saying, if the friends are making you feel like that's your role, get new friends by. - That's exactly it. - But also, I think a lot of times, it's like, "Oh, well, I'm not like them, so I'm this." And it's like, that's a toxic mentality to have with yourself anyway. So I'm like, I don't even like that you called yourself that 'cause you were people standing. - I agree with that. That's exactly how I felt. I was always like internalizing. It came from just my own lack of confidence that, and like, I'm sorry, how am I not supposed to feel insecure about that when every guy is like, "Oh, your friend's so hot." Like, "Oh, can I talk to your friend?" Like, just time and time again. - Unfortunate, exactly. Like, what else am I supposed to think if that's happening to me? And no guy ever wanted to talk to me. - I hate saying this. I know it's so freaking cliche, but I feel like as you get older, you learn that everyone has insecurities. And even someone who you think is like, the coolest, hottest girl who like, all the guys must love. Like, I feel like those friends who I used to look at in my life, like as I got older, I realized like, "Oh, they had a lot of shit at home." And they would have like, to them, they didn't care about that because like they had other issues that were like weighing on them and like traumatic experiences that they had gone through. And it's like, it's just perspective is weird. Cause like people from the outside can look like they have their life all together and they're perfect. And you're like, "Oh, I wish I had their life." And then, you know, you never know what someone's going through. So I think like the comparison, just like, I know it's hard, but try your hardest to just not even let your brain go there first. - Agreed. Also, you are beautiful as you are right now. Also, I feel like 20, you're still so young. You're still so much time to blossom and grow into yourself and learn about yourself and learn that every part of you is beautiful as it is. When I was 20, I was also so insecure and I was still going through all these things too. So, and I'm sitting here 29 and a half. And I feel so much more secure in myself. Like in the past few years, I feel like I really started to understand like who I am. And in the past like couple of years, if not like years, so I really came to terms with also that my body is just, this is my body. Like there, I try to fight it for so long. Like this is my, what am I trying to say? Like just the general structure, there's no changing that except my bill. - You're genetic. - Like that's just who I am. And like it wasn't until like I turned 27 and 28 that I finally came to terms with that. So like it just, your life is a long time of just coming to terms with like, you get what you get? - Yeah. - And you start to understand that it's okay. - You kinda like accept it. - I mean, I think now I, and we can look back when we were 20 and so insecure and it's like, oh, poor girl, like we can like look back and like smile, even though it was so hard at the time, because we can look back and just be like, oh, like she didn't know, but she'll learn. And like it does like, I hate saying it gets better, but it totally does. And you know what, on a funny note, the glow ups just keep going. - It's true. - Like there's so much room for improvement. - And that's what I told myself. - That's what I was always telling myself. Also like when I was 20, little did I know, and I felt, and I still was that girl that only had friends or like all the guys would like go through me to get to my friends, little did I know five years from then, that I would meet the love of my life, which means like a princess. And like everyone has their person out there. So just, no, it's coming. - Ooh, most attractive feature about a man. Superficially or like pre-physical? - Oh, or I guess we could do both. - Ooh, ooh, ooh. - I feel like that's physical. - You know what I love? - Hmm. - I love some forearms. - I'd say forearms are very sexy. - Arms in general, but like forearms. - Farms are good. - I love, I like, I really look at eyes also. - Oh, eyes you, I look at first, for sure. I like, I, when guys have like crazy eyes, like beady brown eyes, like this, like Connor from my land, like that really freaks me out. - Yeah, like I, I like when eyes look sweet and inviting. - Okay. - Like I don't like when they're too like, I'm a man. - I don't know how to explain it. - No matter what color, but just like a soft inviting eye, like hopefully a nice person. - Also a little crooked smile, like a little like, like a little smirk. - Oh, I love. - And that's really cute. - I love a crooked smile. - Hmm. - Yeah, I think if they're just like. - I'm calm. - Then there's the obvious. I'm like, oh, the V and then like the abs and then like the back. - I love, I'm like, I just think of Cal. It was just so annoying, but I'm like, sorry. - I mean, that's, you're so-- - No try to be respectful, of course. - Yeah, just like, honestly just a nice guy personally. I just like, like, yeah, nice guy. - Yeah, I mean, personality is first, but if we're talking about superficial, yep. - Gave the body with the swimmers body. - When was the closest you guys have gotten to ending this podcast? - Ooh, tea. - That's actually really good. - I think it was a time where I was really overwhelmed with everything and I was like, I had a lot of my personal life, a lot of like work stuff. And I was like, I don't know if I like can continue doing it at this level, that's what I was feeling. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That was like years ago though. - I was gonna say, but that's the only time I feel like the us even saying like, oh, one day I guess it will end and like thinking of that. - It's not like we're like, we're ending the podcast. I was just like, oh my God, I'm so overwhelmed. And like, I don't know. I can't keep it up with the everything on my plate right now at this pace. - Yeah, exactly. - But it wasn't like a fight or anything. - No, even that I feel like doesn't really count, but I guess that would be the closest. I think that was the first time where I was like, there's gonna be a day we end. - I know. - I was like, oh no. - I know, it was like a realistic thing to think about. But it wasn't like we were like, we're gonna end it. It was just like, oh my God, one day it will end. And like, what is that rollout going to be when we're ready? - And I think that conversation definitely held us up to have more conversations about like, well, if we want this to one end on a good note and you know, I'll say. - And end on a high. - And end on a high, like let's make sure we have good communication with each other just because like we don't want resentment. We don't want one of us feeling like, you know, anyone's pulling more of the weight than other. And like, I feel like truly that was such a pivotal moment because like, we've never had any things since then. - Yeah. - Which wasn't even a thing, but it was a good like, okay, let's be realistic. The thing is about being a business partner and a best friend with the podcast. - It's true. And like, it's not like, again, we were like, oh, we're gonna end it tomorrow. It was just like, oh my God, like I feel this way right now. And eventually it is going to end. So how are we gonna figure, how are we gonna do that when we're ready? - And how do we not have like a color daddy such big blow up situation? You know what I mean? - Which we never would. - No, no, no, no, no, we're not, I feel like we, no. Too much love there to have that, I think too. - Remy, being in a relationship, how do you deal with people flirting with you slash or attraction? This is great because I feel like so many people act like, oh, I don't find anyone attractive now that I'm in a relationship. I'm like, obviously let's be realistic. Like you can still notice if someone's good looking or like, if someone's flirting with you, it's like, let's not be deluloo. - For sure. - But like pretending it's not a thing. - Callin and I are very open with each other about like finding people attractive. Like, we'll watch Love Island and I'm like, oh my God, he's hot and she's like, oh my God, yeah, she's like really pretty. Or actually I press him a lot. I'm like, who do you think is the prettiest in this K-pop group? 'Cause I'm just curious. - Curious? - Why? - I'm like, there's no jealousy ever going on. I'm just genuinely curious. - Yeah. - Like even when we were in the ambulance, but I'm like, we still are respectful about it. Like for instance with the ambulance, when you're like, are they hot? Like, I'm not gonna in front of a guy be like, yeah, he's really hot. Like that's a line, that's a boundary that I would never cross. We're like very open about that. We like joke around those things a lot. If anybody ever is like, I've never flirted with anybody. - I was gonna say, I don't even think I've seen you in a situation where you're like, help this guy's being too much. - Yeah. - I feel like you're really good with boundaries and all that stuff. - I just like put it up immediately, exactly. Like I've never, I never would flirt with anybody and I know he would never flirt with anybody, but if anybody like comes up to me in a situation and is like, you know, can I buy you a drink or something, da, da, da, da, da, I'm always like, oh, I'm engaged. Like thank you, but I'm engaged. - She's like, I'm engaged, but you can buy her a drink. - No, wait. - It's points to me. - And I told Cal, we went out one time and the guy was like trying to buy me drinks and so I went home and I told Cal, like that's how we were. I'm like, oh my God, this guy was trying to buy me drinks and he's literally Cal goes, wait, like next time we should go and you can give me the free drink. I'm like, oh my God. - Imagine you think. - And then you go ahead to your date. - Can I have another one when I spilled it? I think it's just being, I mean, and every relationship is different. Not everybody feels as comfortable with that and that's totally fine too. It's, you have to be on the same, you have to understand your partner and where their boundaries are. - Like one thing I love that Cal does is any time a viewer comes up and asks for a photo, he always does the air hug. Like his arm's not touching them and I'm just like. - It's so funny. - That's not something you guys ever talked about but clearly that like ever, I just remember after a meetup one time, all his photos had the air hug and we were dying and I was like. - I think I'm gonna die. - But it was cute 'cause I'm like, clearly that's just like for him, he's like, I just want to have this boundary and like make it very, you know, I don't want anything and I'm just like, oh, that's so sweet. Like he thought about it. - Like we really don't get jealous at all. Yeah, I know. - Like it's cute. - He was like, what Carly Rae jumps in the air. You're like Cal, you can actually-- - She's the one you're allowed to, sorry. Oh man, but it's just, it's cute. But yeah. - I think it's all, I also don't like, and like we've never been in the situation or Cal and I, but I've seen online where people get upset. You know, if a guy, like if a girl went up to Cal and was like, hey, can I buy you a drink? And he would be like, I'm engaged, thank you though. And he came and told me, I'd be like, hell yeah. Someone thinks you're hot, that's amazing. Like I love that. - My man's hot. - I think that's amazing. Like I love that. And like he deserves that ego boost, that's amazing. But I have seen people online get upset when someone's, if a girl goes up to a guy and is like, hey, like, you know, flirting with them and they say, sorry, I'm engaged or sorry, I have a girlfriend. It's like, no, you're not sorry about that. That's crazy as I have never been on that side of, but it makes sense, I'm not on that side of the like TikTok. But also, yeah, sorry, like why are you sorry? - Like sorry, I'm engaged. It's like, no, which I understand to some degree, it's like, yeah, sorry, sorry, you don't have a chance. - I mean, I say sorry when I run into people. So I could easily see me be like, oh, so sorry. I'm like, like, sorry, honestly, sorry for you. 'Cause you wish. - Yeah, that's like the thing too. - I could see that side. I'm not sure what, like if I understand being upset of like, sorry, like, no, again, I'm not in a relationship. - I don't, I think for me, I see it more. I was like, oh, like, 'cause he kinda got rejected. You know what I mean? - Sorry, I mean, sorry for you. I know I look perfect and you just want to date me, but I am in a relationship. - Sorry, not happening. - But if he makes it sound like, oh, sorry, I'm in a relationship. - That's different, the tone. - The wife, the wife. - The thing we keep talking about, the wife. - I think there's a respectful way. And also, everybody's levels are different. So just have that conversation with your partner. How would you, how would you like me to proceed? Like, what will make them feel the most comfortable in those situations? - Yes. - Also, let me just say, it's not like every time I step outside, some man's like, "Rami, Rami." - Okay, what's happened? - Like a few times. - Earlier, I was like, was wording it right? 'Cause I was like, I don't want to make it sound like you never get hit off, but I didn't want to say it that far. Like, 'cause I'm like, that's not true. 'Cause I'd be like-- - You know, I've never seen any man actually ever come up to you. - I feel like I already did. - You would work like, I feel like I worded it good, but I was very like, oh, I don't want it to come across that way. - No, I mean, like, let me just say, it's not like it's happening every time I step outside, but the few times that it has, there's a respectful way to go about it. And truly, Kal and I come home and we giggle. - I will say though, Kal's such a, he's down for anything, so I feel like, usually he'll come out with us too. So I can't imagine someone trying to hit on you when you're six, three boyfriend is right next to you. - One time we went out and the girl hit on Kal while we were together. I wasn't there, but he came over and I was like, fuck yeah. - You're like, eh, he still got it. I forget what happened. But also I do think it's a red flag. Like if I were to come home and be like, oh my God, yeah, this guy came up to me, regardless of what I said back and Kal gets upset, like that's a red flag, you know what I mean? Because that's just insecurity in a relationship. You can't control someone coming up and asking to buy you a drink or just saying you look nice. - That's a thousand percent. - You know what I mean? That I feel like is a different story. - Or also like, you wouldn't do this, but if you were to like take the drink and give it to me, and to go back and be like, oh yeah, like the guy brought me a drink like for, to have that understanding that I know for a fact, Kal would like know you weren't being sleazy about it. Do you know what I mean? - It's like a security thing. - It's a security thing. - You need to be secure, yeah. - I know for a fact he would be very, and I'm using a drink as like a, you can fill in the blank with whatever. - Well, even you and I went to dinner and I was swiping on your dating apps for you. - Oh yeah. - And the waiter was like, he, yeah, yeah, yeah. - He asked me, he was like, what dating app? Or like what, he asked me for a tip on dating app or something and I was like, oh, I don't know, I'm engaged. And he was like, wait. - And then he kind of came back was like, aren't you? - Yeah, he was like, wait, wait, you're engaged, but you're on dating. I was like, oh no, no, no, no, I'm swiping for her. And then we were all like giggling about it. And then I told Kal and Kal and Kal was like, wait, let's go back to the restaurant. And I'll be like, like, like fishing for the, for the, the same waiter. Like let's troll him and pretend like I'm upset. Like we just like joke about it. Like we're fine with it, but I also understand. And like that's a conversation we've had. I've been like, is it okay if I swipe on Alicia's dating apps? He's like, yes, it's literally fine. But like we've had that conversation. It's okay. - And not even like, is it okay? It's like, hey, would this bother you? - Of course. Yes, you're so right. But also I could see some people being like, no, that's not okay. I don't mind if Kal is going on his friend's apps, like for his friend, as long as he's not on the date. I'm okay with it. - As long as you're not the one, unless you're spying. - Yeah, as long as, unless it's for your friend truly, then I'm okay. Okay, next question. Top three items you're obsessed with right now and can't live without. - My hair at Black Cushion Foundation. - You love it. - Honestly, Cushion Foundations, I like never got it. I think I just didn't know how to apply it. I think I just thought you like a rabbit instead of like that. You know what really changed the game for me? You told me that the padding and then the padding, the excess off, I also have one for you. I kept forgetting to give you my shade that didn't mention. - Been loving that. Oh, the Fenty, I was wearing it today. It's probably off 'cause I was drinking my drink. But Fenty's skin came out like a lip oil. - Oh my God, the cherry one, I put that on this one. - So good, I loved it. - So good. That's like a newer thing I've been loving. And brown eyeliner, I've been doing brown eyeliner like on my tight liner just like, I forgot how much I love a brown eyeliner. - I love that. Okay, topic for me, the It Cosmetics CC Plus cream. I've been loving the coverage is insane and it has SPF of like 50 in it. - I didn't know that. - Which I've been really trying to obviously wear my sunscreen since all of our facial stuff. I would say truly the Dove serum body washes are amazing and the whole body Dio. - Oh, I love the whole body Dio, you're so right. The Dove whole body Dio is incredible. I'll put that in there. I brought it with me to Asia and Alicia and I are obsessed. I've been using it for anti-chafing purposes. - That is one that I did ask to use because I was like, I will be putting this on my inner thighs so I just wanna make sure you're fine with that. - I'm fine with that. I literally don't care. - But it's great. - Well, I've actually never been a chafer until like this year really. - Really? - Well, actually that's a lie. I will chafe but it was in very, very specific situations 'cause I always wear my little safety shorts underneath. I always wear them so I never really had those problems. This year specifically, I just started to chafe more. I don't know, maybe my thighs got bigger. I don't know, it doesn't matter. So that's amazing. I put it in between my thighs or under boob sweat. It helps with that. It helps any of that kind of stuff. And then I would say my third would probably be thighs specifically. - Just thighs. - And it must be the amount of like millimeters they are apart from each other. It must be the perfect, yeah. - Yeah, friction, yeah. - Yeah, this year I've been really dealing with it. So I like, before I could get away on certain days of not wearing it, now I, there was one day I've forgotten, Nasia, boom. - Yes. - Already like what I felt the uncomfortable. Yeah. - Waddle baby. - I thought that, oh, I hate that, that like friction going on. And then I would say slippers. - You do love a slipper. - I love a slipper. I get so excited to truly go home at night, shower, get all nice and clean, put on some fresh PJs, usually a big oversized K-pop shirt, some shorts, and then my slippers. - Is Remy having a bridal party? - Yes, I am. Whoo. - Whoo. (laughs) - To answer your question, yes, I am. - For Remy, whatever happened to Honey Pop? - Oh, gorgeous question. Honey Pop, in case you don't know, was a skincare company that I came out with years and years and years ago. Let me just say, she was cute for the time, I had no business having a skincare company. Let me just say that, and let me also just say, thank God it was gone by the time that like, all these people who should have skincare companies came out, was the product good? Yes, like was it actually made in a lab that actually knew what they were doing? Yes, did I know what I was doing? No, and like that, the thing is that, that was before I feel like all the influencer brands came out, and I feel like as time has gone on, the ones that needed to fade away, faded away, I'll put Honey Pop in that category. - I'll put parallel on that too. - And the ones that like, should stay, that have owners who genuinely like, know and are very passionate about that, like right, it just, it did not make sense for me. Like, did I like skincare? Yes, and did I struggle with my acne? Yes, but at the same time, that's not enough for me to have a skincare company. And I'm totally aware of that now. I was what, like 22, 23, I was-- - I have a few things to say though. - Sure. - One, you clearly walked, so road could run. (laughing) - Okay. - That's not good. - Hold up the case. - She knows what she's doing. - That's so funny. - I know you meant that, but like, that's not true, but thank you. - And then two, I will say, like, I felt so bad for you, 'cause I remember you had just started a new birth control, and that's when you started breaking out really bad, and it was, I remember when it came out you were like, oh, this sucks, because I've worked for over a year on this skincare brand, and the second it's launching, like, I have the worst skin that I've ever had, and it's just like, I was like, oh, like, skincare's just so hard to do. - Thank you, I appreciate that. I believe, like, if you're gonna have skincare brand, you should be a dermatologist. - You should have beauty experts and dermatologists involved, yes. - Exactly, that's the thing. I believe if you're going to have a, parallel is different, clothing is different, but I'm thinking more of like the makeup girls, like the people that have makeup companies, like you should be, like, a makeup artist, or you should be, like, so genuinely passionate. - Also, it's like, you're a chemist. Like, you need to, like, learn, or partner with someone who is an expert. - Who knows, yeah. - Exactly. To answer your question, she's gone. I believe it was gone within, like, a year or so. It came, she went, again, I partnered with an amazing company. They came to me specifically, that's the thing. They came to me, they're like, do you wanna do this company? I was like, honestly, yeah, that sounds really fun. And again, this was like before the big wave of everyone having a company. - Yeah, everyone had a merch and you had this. - Exactly. - Oh my God, I remember when I said I was releasing merch and I made that, and people were like, I wanted a sweatshirt, I was a cashew, I don't know. - Yeah, I ended up, it just ended up not honestly doing very well, if I'm just being super candid. And I'm sure a lot of that had to do with the fact that I wasn't super, super passionate about masks, right? - Yeah, it was like a cute little, it was just, like, a cutesy little, like, DIY mask situation. You could, like, make it a cute color. It had some, like, exfoliating things. Again, the actual product itself was very good. Like, it was really, really good. But again, I think I was just the wrong person for it. I felt really badly because, again, they came to me and they wanted to work with me. And it just ended up not being a great fit. And they were awesome and super nice. It was a fun experience, I learned a lot. - Oh my God, I can't let people even remember it still. Thank you for listening. - You're legacy. - I had a box under my bathroom sink for, I think, like, four years. Like, and I knew it was expired, but I still had it there. And I was just like, I'd always look at it like, honey, pop, I still have her. I like to look at her. I think it's cool. Like, it's something that I'll show my kids one day. I was so young, I was still, like, new to doing social media. I wasn't sure how to make a decision for myself yet. It was a lot of, like, people, well, first of all, them coming to me, a lot of people on my team being like, "Oh, this is a really cool opportunity." - Well, like, you have to do this, yeah. - One day you can sell it from millions. - You would miss out if you didn't do this. And so I was like, "Oh my God, like, for sure." But now, I'm obviously a lot older. I know myself a lot more. I know what I want to do and, like, what I actually want to leave behind. To anybody who bought honey pop, thank you so much. Appreciate you. It really wasn't a ton of people, but thank you. Now I know, you know, something that would make more sense that I'm, like, genuinely super passionate about. Like, it would make so much more sense for me, even to do the, like, the spatula collaboration that I did. - I used mine this morning. - Thank you so much. - I used mine every day. - I met a girl at Disneyland who was like, "I bought her spatula." So, like, that made more sense to me because it's more in the cooking realm. If I were to drop, like, a cookware brand or something. Like, that would just make a lot more sense because it's something that I am much more passionate about. - Yeah, I think that's the biggest thing that hurts a lot of influencers. And, granted, like, we were passionate in those things when we first started it. But I feel like when you just see influencers or celebrities, like, slap their name on literally everything, it just kind of, like, I don't know. It's just, like, okay, another cash grab. I don't know. But I, not that honey pop was. - Well, I also didn't make a dollar. (laughing) - Me, welcome to the club. Thank you, Cotton, for sponsoring the Pretty Basic Podcast. Since you hit play on this podcast, thousands of photos have been posted on social media. Capturing the moment, but not always living in them. And probably a few hundred more by now. Cotton is asking us to help our listeners take a pause. Tell stories instead of just watching them. And to make moments better by wearing a versatile, comfortable, and long-lasting fabric. A fabric you may even be wearing or laying on right now. As I'm recording this, I'm currently sitting in one of my favorite cotton sweatsets. It is so unbelievably comfy. And you guys know, there is just something about me. I'm very, very particular when it comes to choosing fabrics. It can't be too itchy, it has to be super soft. I'm very selective. And cotton is natural and comes from the earth. And because it's natural, it does not contribute to microplastic pollution. Cotton is natural and hypoallergenic, making it gentle on your skin. I'll be honest with you guys. My life can be chaotic, and I'll be so busy back-to-back, but I'm definitely taking a pause, especially when my life feels like so, you know, go, go, go, go. There's been so much happening. Honestly, I love wearing my comfy cotton sweats. There is nothing better than just sliding them on. Oh, opening up my drawing, getting so excited to take my tight pants off. Shower. I'm putting on something so comfy after a shower, something so comfy, the cotton on my legs, just feeling so smooth and relaxing. It puts me at so much ease. Not only being comfortable, but also turning off my phone and watching a movie with Cal. Taking a pause is so important for me, because I really get wrapped up in work, and I have a really hard time setting boundaries, so it's really important for me to make those clear distinctions between work and relaxing time. Remy and I always hear you guys, and we want to be present for you as much as we can. Let us know how you like to press pause. Press pause with cotton, the natural choice. Discover the fabric of now at thefabricofourlives.com. I know we've all tried many different ways to feel good after a night of dreams, and I found something that actually, actually works. It's pre-alcohol probiotic from the brand Zbiotics. Huge shout out to the influencers and influencer, Miss Remy Ashton, for introducing me to Zbiotics. They have changed my life, and you need to try them. They're probiotic was invented by PhD scientists to tackle rough mornings after drinking. Here's how it works. When you drink, alcohol gets converted into a toxic byproduct in the gut. It's this byproduct, not dehydration. That's to blame for your rough next day. Create alcohol produces an enzyme to break this byproducts down. This is a proactive solution that wards off feeling miserable the next day instead of a reactive approach, like drinking electrolytes or eating greasy food. My first time trying Zbiotics was at a music festival, and Remy gave me some. When I tell you I had them all week long, I drank it before my first tequila soda, that's my go-to, and you wouldn't believe how on top of my game, I felt the very next morning. Like, I felt amazing. I'm not kidding ever since then. I always have Zbiotics in my pantry. I stock up. I just ordered some more the other day. It's so nice, especially to offer friends, and after turning 30, it's just become a necessity. And if you're wondering how to use Zbiotics, pre-alcohol, probiotic, don't worry, I got you. It's actually very simple. Step one, have Zbiotics. For best results, make Zbiotics your first drink of the night. I personally like to have mine about an hour or so before I plan on drinking. Step two, drink responsibly, pace yourself, hydrate, and get a good night's sleep. Step three, enjoy tomorrow, wake up feeling refreshed and ready to take on the day. Join the movement of empowered women choosing Zbiotics for smoother mornings and unstoppable success. Enhance your mornings with Zbiotics. Go to zbiotics.com/prettybasic to get 15% off your first order when you use Pretty Basic at checkout. Zbiotics is backed with 100% money back guarantee, so if you're unsatisfied for any reason, they'll refund your money, no questions asked. Remember to head to zbiotics.com/prettybasic and use the code Pretty Basic at checkout for 15% off. Thank you to Zbiotics for sponsoring this episode and our good times. - How to help with uncertainty in your 20s and knowing to trust yourself. Love you both. - Ooh. - Speaking of uncertainty in your 20. - This is the first thing that came to my mind. So I could have a better answer tomorrow or when I'm in a shower thinking about this. (laughing) - We just like, we install shower heads they come from the ceiling. - Like rain on me, like love that. - I think you just get used to uncertainty. You get used to realizing that you don't know what the future holds or like that things can change or evolve or your career can change. And I think in your 20s, you just have such an idea of how your life is gonna go. So the first time it feels uncertain, it's so scary. But then once you go through that, then the next time something's uncertain, you're like, I'll get through it. - I've been here before. - Yeah. - I think the same thing. - Okay. - I was like, that sounds right in my head. - Yeah, no, no, I completely agree with that. I think once you start to understand that, and it's also not just in your 20s, I can assume like uncertainty is just a normal feeling that you go through like joy or sadness or anxiety. - We watched it. - We watched it too. - Truly, like it's something that you always experience. But I do think as you get older, the beauty of getting older is you know more of yourself and you know what you want and you know what you strive for, you know your moral compass. And that helps you navigate through the uncertainty. - A thousand percent. And I just think like again, you realize that life is about life is never what you plan. Like the plan that you have for your life, the quicker you can learn to let go of like the control you want of everything, the better quality of life you'll have. - So that's what I'm working on right now. - It's hard. - Truly at 2022, I thought that I was gonna be a skincare guru because someone told me I was going to be a skincare guru right now if someone came and was like, "Hey, I want you to do a skincare." I'd be like, "Call someone else." - Not your girl. - Yeah, sorry. Call a high room or whoever else is out there. Like truly like call someone else because I am not your girl. It's just, it takes a lot of like learning and understanding and growing and going through those things to find out who you are and like what you want. - Yeah, a thousand percent. - Does Calmind having Ollie and Alicia as third wheels a lot? - I can't answer this one. - No, but also I wouldn't say you guys are like third wheels a lot, would you say that? I don't think so. - I agree. Maybe just online it looks like we are. - I was gonna say, I think it's that like, Cal and I spend so much time together. We also spend time with his friends a lot. Like his friends come and stay with us a lot. Like there's a lot that I don't show online that people just don't know obviously. So I wouldn't actually say you guys are around like a ton. We definitely like do things to get there from time to time. But he doesn't mind. - No, I feel like, I feel like he doesn't mind all. - I also, I love having his friends over. Like I love hanging out with his friends and I have to believe he feels the same way to some degree. - I'm sure at first he was like, whoa, this is a lot. You know what I mean? - But we are a lot too, yeah. But no, I feel like now I feel like it's not a lot. - I think she loves it. - I think you guys are so funny. He loves being there. I also will give him the option. - Poker night was so fun. - Like I was thinking about-- - We should do that again. - The other day with Cal. I started giggling and he was like, what are you laughing at? 'Cause I was looking for posts for Ollie for his birthday. And I saw a poker one and I was like, remember when Ollie beat us all on poker? But we knew he was going to beat us all on poker. - My favorite was him like, did I win? - Wait, we should do a poker night. - Let's do it. - I love that idea. - Yeah, did I win and he had all the chips. - My obsessive personality, like I wanted to go home and buy a full on poker set. - You should have. - And I never did. - That was really fun. But it was in my cart multiple times. 'Cause I was like, I need it. - I see you screenshot and who's going to be Remi's man of honor. You know what's funny is I saw that. And I was like, I don't remember screenshot. (laughing) - Likely story. - I truly was like, 'cause I saw it earlier and I was like, Lisa, why did you screenshot that? - I don't want to annoy anybody with not answering. And right now, Alicia and I have this funny joke where she's like, I mean, for the bachelorette, I mean, if I'm-- - Invited. - If I'm going. - It's so funny. - I don't want to assume. - Obviously, you're in the bridal party. (laughing) - Don't ask yourself. - Don't annoy me. - Okay, again, though, I'm not going to like you. - I appreciate it. This is the first time you've like, said that. - I appreciate you not assuming. Obviously, we all know you're in the bridal party. - Yay! - Yay! But I, I want to ask everybody offline for-- - Yes, that's sweet. - Before I say anything. So I know people keep asking and don't worry. Like, you will know eventually if-- - Even like you. - I don't know if I'm going to film it and post it or I don't know if you'll find out on the wedding day. Like, truly, I don't know. I haven't decided anything. - I'm in the bachelorette party because that will be. - Well, the bachelorette, also I'm going to have more people than just the bridal party. - Oh, you're so right, you're so right. - So I don't, I mean, I truly, I have not thought of my content strategy plan. - What, why should you go? - But just know, like, I want that to be like a private moment. I'm going to, like, I'll film it, whether it's for my memories or I choose to post it. - Yeah, I haven't thought of, like, the way that I want to ask people, so comment down below and let me know if you have any suggestions on what I should do. - I feel like, honestly, like, TikTok has so many good ideas. - I know. - And it has to be, like, personal to you, too. Like, it has to be something that's so remy, or, like, you and that person, or you know what I mean? - I kind of love that I like making it special for every person. - It doesn't have to be, like, the same, I don't know. - Yeah. - I personally just always, like, the thing that I look forward to most about a wedding, other than marrying the love of my life, is the bridesmaid's aspect, because, or the bridal party aspect, because I spend more, probably just as much time in the morning, getting ready with all my girls, as I do with Cal. And so, I'm, like, I'm really looking forward to that. Like, that's what I'm, like, looking forward to most for the morning, truly. Like, that's going to be so exciting and fun. So, I want my girlies there, and that's something that I've always personally wanted. - Speaking of weddings, Remy, are you going to have an unplugged wedding, or are you going to allow people to film it? - Oh. - Where's the live stream? - This is the question of, like, of the moment, considering all the stuff that happened online. In case anybody missed it, which Alicia and I were like, "Oh my gosh, we should totally." 'Cause, honestly, when I was watching it all go down, I was like, "Oh my God, these are, like, real things that I have to think about." Regarding unplugged or not, I will say, okay, so I saw a lot of commotion around what happened at Covert and Alex's wedding. - Yes. - Oh my God. - Oh my God, yes. - Yes. That was really, 'cause I was like, "This is crazy." And so then it started getting me to think about, obviously, like, what I want for my wedding, in case you missed it, there was a guest at their wedding, which, when I saw this happening in real time, I was like, "Oh, that's not." Before anyone picked up on it, I had seen the TikTok the morning after the wedding that was like, "Blog is up on the channel." And I was like, "Oh, that's," and I was like, "No, that's really, really, really bad." Basically, a guest had gone to their wedding, and I believe they were posting during the ceremony when it was asked to be an unplugged ceremony, which is already bad, but the vlog really got me, because I was like, they haven't even gotten, they're probably still in a hide, they just woke up, they haven't even, like, gotten a single photo back yet. And there's already, like, vlogs and all these things up up their wedding, which I definitely didn't agree with. And then I saw a lot of people, I became this big discussion online, and a lot of people were like, "You should not be vlogging at weddings, "you shouldn't be doing this, da-da-da-da-da." And so, not only was I thinking about mine, I was also like, "Oh, my God." There's just a respectful line, even if you're, quote, "allowed" to, or you're given permission to, like, not be obnoxious about it. If the bride and groom are okay, it's just such a weird situation, or like, we're in such a niche category, because we are vloggers ourselves, so like, we, and like, we do social media, so like, with having all these people come to the wedding, it's like, you need to make a decision. Yes or no? To post your vlog before they could even get home, the bride and groom could even get home, is that's what's really disrespectful and not okay? I'd be pissed. For sure. I'd be like, "So, do I cancel my Netflix special?" Get Netflix on the phone. The main reason why people do that is more so for the professional photos that they're paying, like, literally thousands of dollars for, you don't want phones in all your photos. Yes, when you get the photos back and everyone's phone is out. But I will say, I've heard, I think it's so situational, because I've heard some brides say they're so glad that they had other people have phones, because they had so many other angles, or videos, or things that they never would have seen, and even to see it from that person's POV, versus just the super, you know, sometimes you love candid photos more than, like, stage professional ones. So, I've heard both sides where some people like unplugged and like plugged, so like, or plugged, or having phones, that sounds weird. Plugged. I gotta love that plugged. This is a plugged ceremony. Everyone's plugged, plugged. I think it just, it depends at the end of the day on the bride and groom, and what they want, because it's their day. And your relationship with the bride. Yeah, it's just like making sure that you are not stepping over a boundary, respecting what they want. And so for me, I've been thinking, like, I personally would love for everyone to vlog. Like, I love, even, I'll rewatch if I was there in your vlog, and like, and all, you me and Ollie hung out, and we all vlogged. I'll watch everybody's point of views, because I just like seeing everyone's point of views, and like, that's what I want to see. I want to see, like, people's getting ready, or, you know, when I'm up in the suite, like, doing a hair change, like, what are you doing down there? Like, I want to see that, like, I'm curious about those things. So, you know how they have, like, photo, video booths at weddings with the belief messages? Yeah. Or they'll have disposable cameras or Polaroids on the tables. Yeah. You should have vlog cameras with lights. Wait, that's so cute. And you get all of the memory. Wait, I love that. All the memory cards, like, that's fun. Wait, I'm obsessed with that idea, because that's the thing is, I just, like, cannot wait to sit down after all the craziness is done, and, like, watch everybody's point of views. But I do agree that I should get to post my stuff first. Yeah. As, like, silly as that sounds. Like, it is our job and our livelihood, and, like, things like that. So it's weird. It's weird when, like, personal things kind of cross over with the business side of things, too. Well, even because I went to a wedding, and I remember everyone had their phones. It wasn't announced if it was plugged or not. Yeah. And I remember being, like, can I have my phone out? And I look at everyone has their phone out. So I'm like, "Okay, I can have my phone out." And then I remember, like, seeing other people had posted her coming down the aisle and stuff. So I was like, "Okay, I think it's fine for me to post." So then I posted it, and then people were like, "How dare you post her?" And I was like, "I don't know." And I was just like, "I don't know." But then also-- It's what the bride wanted. Yeah. Like, she was so fine with it. But again, I was like, "Oh, this would have been nice to know beforehand." You know what I mean? Like, so I do think that's something nice to, like, everyone's just going to go off of each other. So even if there's someone who's-- Even if you're not supposed to, but someone else sees it or someone's going to forget. It's like, I don't know. Or, like, have the whoever's going up to speak, like, start the ceremony off with, like, "Hi, this is an unplugged ceremony." Or I saw online a couple recently was getting married, and the person who was officiating them was like, "All right, everybody. You get two minutes. Take your phones out. Take your photos." And, like, the bride and groom were posing, which was cute. And then, like, look at them away now. Yeah. So that was cute, too. It's different for everybody. I think also just something to note that I took away from this situation was people who are coming to my wedding. Like, everyone can invite who they want to their wedding, obviously. People who are coming to my wedding, I would expect to respect my wishes. Oh. And I only want people at my wedding who are going to respect my wishes. And that's how I feel. And if they're not, I will make sure they're not there. Yeah. I'm so sorry. Your invitation actually went to someone else. Sorry. Someone else's invitation went to you. Your seat's no longer available. We've actually restructured the list. And, unfortunately, it's no standing room available, so you're going to have to go back home. Love that. I think that at the end of the day, you just, I need to sit down and actually figure out what do I want. Yeah. And then make that very clear. Yeah. And I think whatever's most stress free for you. You know what I mean? For sure. At the end of the day, I need to do whatever I want to do. And whether you're online or not, every brighter groom should do. I know so many times. And when I went on the trip with a knot, a big thing was, how do you handle family members who really want to say in your wedding? And so, actually, this is a really good piece of advice that I'm going to pass on, that I pass on to Abby, who's Cal sister who's getting married, where she was just like, "Oh, my God. What did you take from the trip? What's the best thing?" And I was like, "Oh, this is really interesting, actually." Sorry. I was just thinking, because you know how sometimes, oh, my God, there'll be like, whether it's a relative or a family friend or someone. They're like, "Oh, I'll sing at your wedding." And you're like, "Oh, shoot. Like, how do I say no?" Like, usually with the best intentions, they want to help. And they want to like, but that's so awkward. And not just singing, but even like, someone wanting to plan whether it's a bachelorette, or like your bridal shower, and you're like, "No, no, no, I already hired someone to do..." And I know it's a love language, and they just want to help, but I do think weddings, weddings bring out the crazy, whether it's with good intent or bad. And as a people pleaser, you can't be a people pleaser, because otherwise, it will not be your wedding. It'll be everyone else's. Agreed. I mean, luckily, I've been very lucky that both my parents and my future in-laws, and just like everybody in my life has been so nice to me about, and like, I've never felt any pressure for anything yet. Again, we haven't really gotten into anything yet, but we'll see of anything regarding choices or anything. But the big thing, which I know a lot of people feel, is like, "Oh, you know, like my parents are paying, or I'm getting this money from this family member, and they want to have a say in the wedding because they're contributing." And so the not trip kept saying, like, all these professionals, they were just like, "You know what you do then?" You devote a certain thing, because weddings are expensive, obviously. I totally get that. And so they're like, "What you do is you devote whatever money you're having given to you from whatever family member, or friend, or whatever, and you devote that to a certain thing." So it's like, "Okay. My parents are giving me this much money. I'm devoting them to food." So if they do have a say, you know, they can come to the food, they're taking our fish. Do you have chicken or fish, or it's steak or chicken? That's great. Like, you can narrow down your favorites, and then you can like, let them have a say. I would love a choice, exactly. I mean, I know some people, obviously, all sort of like, "Here, here's some money. Do whatever you want with them." I mean, I feel like the ideal situation is like, "Are you giving me this money with conditions? Is this conditional, or is it not conditional?" I'm just understanding that, because I do think a lot of times people will give a gift like that. Like, "Hey, we'd love to help pay for the wedding," but then subconsciously they would like a say, where it's not stated, "Hey, we want to help. We want to like, what can we help you with?" Or whatever. I don't know. Devoted. Take their money. Devote that to cocktail napkins. Devote that to floral. Devote that to two. Photo booth. Photo booth. Exactly. Stuff that's kind of easy to hit up. Oh, what background should we get for the photo booth then? Like, since you're, if they do ask, like, "Hey, can I help?" Like, then you're like, "Oh, yeah." So I actually took your money, I put it towards the photo booth. What color do you think the photo booth should be? I'm thinking blue. Rops are no problem. Exactly. Wow. Wait, that wasn't that a good tip. So any of my friends who are getting married who, like, have been like, "What did you take away from that trip?" That's the big thing. I was like, "What a great tip." Even, like, "Should I have disposable cameras on the thing or should I have a video?" Or, like, "Is this a better? Do we do the confetti thing where we all leave?" Or the sparklers. Yeah. It's a good thing to, like, narrow down your favorites and then let that person, like, help. Just take their input. They don't have to decide, but you can be like, "Help. I would love your opinion." Like, how to include them, but not too much. Only if they ask, too. I feel like you don't need to offer that, but I do. I have some friends who have been in situations where, you know, parents are paying or relatives are paying, and they're, like, demanding a saying thing. And I think a lot of it is, like, they just want to be a part. Weddings make people crazy. I know. But I think, like, for some people who aren't heard, they just, like, getting louder versus, like, coming to you being like, "Hey, like, I know it's your day I'd love to be included." Like, obviously, like, the- Yeah, maybe it's, like, a projection of some sort. I think it's, like, feeling one out of control or two, feeling like they're getting looked over, no one cares about their. I feel like a lot of, like, older relatives, at least in my life, they'll, like, make comments and you're, like, "Okay, just be out right and say, like, 'Say what you really feel?'" Say what you really feel, like, don't be like, "Oh, no one, I don't know." Like, it's just, like, "I'm hoping to remain this even keel throughout my experience." I think I really might, too, 'cause it's just a day. I mean, I didn't grow up in a family, even distant family members who, like, I've never grown up in that, where it's, like, they're such a say. I'm praying my in-laws are like that. But maybe they won't be because mine are so chill. But also, I've never, and realistically, like, my- I'm sure they- I mean, I don't know if they have, but, like, I would mostly be paying for my wedding. You know, it's not like they're providing the whole thing. I do know that's a harder thing when it's, like, your parents are paying for it all. And that's what I understand that, too. I really do. So it's like, "Well, you have to bring aunt so-and-so who, like, raised you." And I also remember hearing something where it's like, if I haven't spoken to them in a year, they're not going to come to the wedding. Like, that just, you know, I do think that's a very real- 'Cause there used to be a group of people who, like, were people that we grew up with that I used to think, "Oh, I'm going to have to invite them." And I'm like, "No, I don't have to." And that's where I'm at right now, where I'm like, people are, like, every person has a dollar sign on their head. And it's like, it- obviously, I want them there, but at the end of the day, it's- it's a numbers game. So it's like, I love this person. I haven't seen them in 10 years, but I love them. Like, but they were there for me when I was a kid. Like, what do you do? So, like, I'm definitely in that. 'Cause also, that makes my number jump from, like, this to, like, this. You have me call them and say, "Here's the live-stream link where you'll be able to view the wedding of Mr. and Mrs. Cal Parsons." I'm dying. Um, please join us in the queue. You're really? I already told you you're in the bridal party. You don't have to fight for your spot anymore. No, no, no. This is me fighting for the fate of honor. I'm kind of- I'm truly kidding. I'm truly- No, I think I just need- like, I would love to be a sassy little secretary. But I can't do it for myself. I can only do it for other people. I feel- that's exactly how I feel. So I'm like, I want that side to show out. Okay. Well, who do I need to yell at? I'm gonna keep that in mind. And especially for Mrs. Remy Ashton's wedding, I will throw hands. When a bitch shows up in a white dress, you know what to do. Hi, your seat is actually here in this closet. Lock it. There's, like, a TV so she can do it with the red wine. Me and Ollie will- Oh, I'll do- Oh, no! Lucky for you, I have the perfect dress that will fit you. It's in this closet! I'll go change! I cannot imagine the audacity of someone wearing white to a wedding. It's really crazy. They're crazy. Again, though, which I can't- I can't fully say this, but I'm like, similarly, you want people at your wedding who will respect. But also, I understand it's usually, like, a crazy aunt or, like, a really crazy mother-in-law or something like that. Well, they're, like, it's cream. Yeah. Or, like, they're like, well, it's a- it's a light gray. And you're like, no. See, I- Photograph? That's white. Even when we were going to Matt and Patricia's wedding, I had a dress that was, like, a light, light, light brown. And I was like, I don't want anything that could possibly look, like, even cream. Same. So I was like, we're going, like, I forget what I wear green. Yeah. I, like, purposely went out of my way 'cause I was like, I can't bring anything. Even that we all did a, like, a brunch or something like that. I was like, even at that, I cannot wear anything that has white. Absolutely. And then, like, that's how people should think. I know. I understand. And that's very respectful of you. Oh, here's one. We need the Zane and Alicia tea. What is the tea? I need the, the listeners to know that Heath and I are- Heath Mariah and I, we are here for it. We are here for it. Interesting. We are here for it. Um, along with the viewers, I love when the comments are like, "Oh my God, like, we love a Rameen, like, Heath." We're like, "No, no, no. Like, we're here for it. We are!" You guys are both amazing people and I think you would be so cute. But if you want to just be friends, you can just be friends. It's fine. No, I like, I like being friends with people before anything. That's so true. And that's so true. Being friends before a relationship is so nice. And just like, um, Leah and Miguel on, on Love Island versus Miguel and Sierra. You get it. She literally said that. She was like, "I got it." Like, you guys were friends before and we just had, uh, like, a physical relationship. You're so right. And you took the words right out of my mouth, Rameen. You'd wait, move your mouth and I'll say it. Just like Leah and Miguel on Love Island, they have a friendship first. And then it can blossom into something. Do you think he's cute? I've already said that. You think he's cute? Yeah, I've literally already said that publicly. Say yes or no? I don't know. What's your favorite thing about him? I'm like, people, people, people, okay, we're not going there. Everyone's like, "Give us the tea." I'm like, "I don't know what you want me to give." Okay, here's the thing. T, you think he's cute? Rameen, this isn't high school. It's T. I have nothing else to report. You think he's cute? That's the T. I can neither confirm nor deny that we've talked about stuff. That's it. That's it. Literally, that's it. I feel like I actually didn't know that. Okay, next question. Alicia, have you ever thought about freezing your eggs? I know a lot of people in my life, I was talking about this earlier, where they're like, "Yeah, I'm really thinking about freezing my eggs and all this stuff." It's so weird because I feel very passionate where I don't feel like I need to do that, but I've also had women who are older tell me the sooner you can freeze your eggs. It's weird because I've always been someone who just intuition, the INFJ, the eye for intuition. I'm trusting my gut, but at the same time, it's like, how much do you trust your gut versus what if it's too late where one day I can't have kids and I will regret not freezing my eggs sooner? You mean trust your gut of just wait or your gut telling you to wait? My gut saying I don't feel a desire to freeze my eggs, but I know what if one day I'll look back and be like, "Wow, I should have done it when I was 30 because maybe when I'm 36, it'll be too late or something like that." Obviously, ideally, I would want kids by the time I'm 36, but maybe there's a world where I don't have kids by then and I'm going to look back and be like, "Oh, I wish I froze my eggs." I was even talking to a friend and she's 35 and I remember I was talking to her about it and she was like, "Yeah, when I was 30, I didn't care too much, but now I am caring." She has kids or no kids. She doesn't have kids and she's like, "I'm thinking I'm really considering it." And I was just like, "You know what? I've always taken the seat of if I'm meant to have kids, I'll have kids and if not, I won't." But obviously, then there's science too where it's like, "Okay, but why not help?" So I do think it's so personal, but me currently in this moment, I'm not researching it, but it is like a back thought of like, "Oh, maybe, you know, that's not the plan I've ever had for my life, but maybe there's a world where that's something I should deeply consider." I will say, because my mom's adopted, Ash and I have always been so open to adopting kids. So I think, which is like, obviously, that isn't for everyone if people don't feel like passionate about that, but I do think like, because that's an option and I've always thought that. I guess it doesn't seem like it would be the end of the world if I couldn't have my own kids, which like, obviously, I would still love to. But I don't know, it's so weird, it's so weird, and also sometimes it's just like, it may not be my eggs, maybe it'll be like my guy who struggles with that, you know what I mean, or like, whatever the case is. Like, I don't know, it's such a weird conversation, but I'm glad people are having it. I also like, just the thought of like, "Okay, where do my eggs stay and what if they like mix them up and I get someone else's?" And like, like, "Oh my goodness!" No, but like, isn't it crazy? I think you have to pay like $100 or something a year to like store your eggs. Keep them in the freezer. It makes sense, but it's just weird, you know what I mean? Yeah, I agree. I think it's really cool that people are talking about it so much more, and more people are doing it now. I have friends who are even in relationships, like long-term relationships, and are still talking about doing that because they are just not ready now. So I think that's super cool. I think that it's different for everybody. I think honestly, you should just follow your gut, and if there's always going to be a better time. Because even right now, you could be like, "Oh, I wish I did it when I was 25." Yeah. That's just how it's going to be so you don't need to think in that way. Yeah. And whenever you are ready, then that was your time when you were ready to do so. Yeah. I feel like check in with me in a year. We'll see where we're at. I think that it's a wonderful thing to have an option to do, and there's no pressure or stress on your time. But at least in this moment, I feel good about that. Yeah. I think no rush personally right now. Yeah. And if you're meant to have kids, then you will. Can't we speed it? Yeah! How many times soon? Give me a few years. Maybe. Maybe. You get your eggs frozen, and I'll get pregnant at the same time. Whoa. Then we can like both go through something fun at the same time. I don't know if mine would be considered fun. I don't think being pregnant sounds funny either. What do you mean? Wait, did your mom like a like changing thing? Oh, totally. Like there's those moms who are like, "It was the most beautiful nine months of my life." I don't think she loved it. Okay. And then there's the people who are like, "Oof, it was really right." I don't think I'm going to love it either, to be honest. I think I'm going to love it. I feel like you will. You're going to glow. I can't wait to be like, "Bib, go get me pickles." Yeah, you're going to have the craziest food combos. School-isha. Wait, you're going to have the craziest food combos, or because you already like weird food combos, maybe it's going to do a factory reset, and you're going to be like, "I only want bread and butter," or like, "Imagine I have cardboard, and I'm going to be so..." My mom said big stick popsicles. I love her. The big stick pops. She loved. And then pickles. And there's something else off to ask her that she said, "Did you do like a pregnancy edition when you did your weird food combos?" You know what? No, because I feel like everyone, I just kept trying to find -- I look up like -- I look up pregnancy ones. Yeah. I'm trying to find anything weird. I'm so curious which one specifically. I think my mom really liked watermelon or something. I forget. Specific things. Wait, that's so funny. I can't wait. I mean, in my dreams, we'd be pregnant to get there, but if we're not. Hey, Remy, you never know. I mean, I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. Just like, give me the heads up. I did. I told you down the sperm bank. We watched the Kardashians episode where Loey and Malika went to the sperm bank. No, but I know what's her name from Vanderpump did that too. It was very interesting. It's weird because you pick out -- they had binders. You know how people say dating apps are weird because you swipe and it's just based off of looks? Yeah. Yo. Next level is sperm donors because you basically go through and it's like, "What do I want one my kid to look like?" I think maybe even top above hinge to be known as. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. Like even more. Because some people are like, "I feel so weird just like swiping because it feels superficial." But I'm like, "Dude, I'll give you one better going to the sperm bank, opening binders and reading about people's personalities because obviously your kid will also have some of their personality traits." Also, what I found interesting is they -- well, two things -- they have certain tiers where you can pay more money and it was like level A, level B, level C, level A. You pay a lot more money, but then they use the sperm once and then delete it or they throw it out or they get rid of it so that the baby doesn't have other siblings out there. Because you know, a lot of kids will go -- Wait, you can -- oh, but there's multiple. They just -- God. Yeah. So it's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. It's got to go. I'm going to go. Redheads are not able to donate sperm or cell sperm. Why? I don't know. But I just think that's a little strange. Yeah. I love a redhead. What are you trying to get rid of the redheads for? You know, also, redheads need significantly more anesthesia when they go under. Huh. Why can't redheads donate sperm? Oh, you can't. Okay. I -- I'm so sorry. That was a myth. It said that this -- the larger the world's are just sperm bank is telling potential donors who have red hair that there simply wasn't much demand. Oh, people didn't want -- But you can. Wait. The way that you said a myth, but, like, you made it up. Like, it was funny. I've heard -- I think Kaylee might have told me that forever, go like, "I've heard that for a long time." I just started doing that. Oh, sorry. That was a myth. That was a myth. That was a myth. So sorry. Yeah, that was a myth. Wait, that was so funny. Wait, no. It's not funny that the redheads weren't being chosen. This isn't even a hot take. This is me just being curious. You know how when it was a new thing to have influencer families, you know, family vloggers go viral and now that the kids are older, we're hearing their side and granted there's good and bad to both sides, whatever, I'm so curious because I saw a few TikToks of people saying that they were a sperm donor child and now that they're getting older, it was interesting hearing their POV of things and there was multiple of them I saw on TikTok. They were, like, stitching each other because they had a tattoo of the number that the sperm thing was. Aww. Because, like, that's their dad. You know what I mean? Like, I'm so curious just to hear there's, you know, and granted again, it's different for however, whoever was grown up and I honestly love that, like, you know, science has evolved that you can do something like this, but I am so curious to just hear, like, what's it like? What's that like? You know what I mean? In Sweden, up until a few years ago, women couldn't go to a sperm bank and be impregnated unless you were like, unless you were a couple. And then just a few years ago, they made it so that single mom to go. So at Christmas. Yes. She went as soon as they opened it up for a single woman to go. Oh my god. Isn't that really cool? See, I think that's so cool because it's like, I think there's so many years where women were just like, I don't care who it's with. I just want a baby. Yeah. And now, and then a lot of times, whether that's like, you're stuck in a toxic relationship or like something like that and like, you know, it's just work. But I would be so scared to like, it feels like adoption because obviously you can have an open or closed adoption, but it's like, could you somehow, what if your kid who is a sperm donor baby is like, I want to find my dad? Like, how do you do that? I think at 18, I think they said that on the Kardashians episode. I think that's when they're able to get information if they want it, like similar to when you're adopted. Wow. That's crazy. It's just so interesting. That also might be a myth. I might have made that up. But I think they said that on the Kardashians episode, but it was really, it was really interesting. Well, now that I think about it, I'm sure on the guy side and the like, you know, whoever's picking the sperm and then the guy side too, like I'm sure it says, are you open to contact? Are you open to contact or not? Have you ever seen three perfect strangers? The movie or the show? The show with the three guys with the study, three identical strangers. You guys, everyone needs to watch. We'll end on this. It's this story about how this guy went to college and then at college, everyone is a real story. This happened in real life. This guy's walking around the campus and everyone's calling him a different name. He's like, what is going on? What's going on? Turns out there was a guy on campus who looked exactly like him. They're like, Oh my God, wait, they put it together. Their twins stop. They go crazy viral in the news. Oh my God, this is so crazy. Boom. Turns out triplets. There's another one. And so I don't want to spoil it actually. It's a really crazy story. Okay. What's it on? Actually, I will spoil it. Okay. I think it's on. I'll just give you like you need to watch. But even if it's the same spur on who lives strong jeans, but like if they're all different, well, no, so what it was, then they're not from a sperm bank. They were actually all three adopted. I won't give away all the details, but just scratching the surface, it came out that there was this really crazy, horrible study being done with an adoption agency where they would put all these kids out, separate them, put them in different classes and watch them to see how they developed in these different classes, like nature versus nurture, like identical. What the hell? It was. Just watch it. It's insane. Well, it's crazy because there's always those studies that are like, there's always studies, right, about how much is genetic or blah, blah, blah, and I feel like twins are a huge part of that because it's like, well, let's just use two twins, give them different lifestyles and see how much changes or whatever, but it's like, were they old enough to consent to that? No, they were separated at birth, literally. That's crazy. Yeah. I highly recommend watching it. It's insane. It's a real story. And honestly, it's really heartbreaking. It's so sad. And I do not understand how it ended in the way that it did and like to this day is still happening. Oh my God, I can't wait to watch it. It's really, really good. Well, we went a little over time today. Sorry. We do have a lovely gossip dinner to go to. Can't wait to chat it up. Can't wait to hear about this news that I didn't hear. I didn't say anything about news. I need a story from you because I've been waiting to hear this anyway. Thank you guys so much for watching another episode of Pretty Basic. We are loving life and each other and each other. If you've made us the very, very, very, very, very end of this video, you guys should comment that you should comment a red chili pepper emoji because these were burning questions. Love them. Love you guys. Yeah. Don't forget to subscribe. We love you. We'll see you next week. Bye. Mwah. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode. [BLANK_AUDIO]
