[music] What you are about to listen to is a podcast produced by Philaklea Ministries. Philaklea Ministries is offered to all free of charge. However, there are real and immediate needs associated with it. If you are a regular listener or enjoy any of the content produced by Philaklea Ministries, we humbly ask that you consider becoming a contributor. You can learn more about our funding needs at www.PhilakleaMinistries.org. Please note that Philaklea Ministries is not a 401(c)(3) nonprofit organization, and that contributions are not tax deductible. Supporting Philaklea Ministries is just like supporting your other favorite podcasters and content creators, and all proceeds pay the production bills, make it possible for us to pay our content manager, and provide a living stipend for Father David. God bless you and enjoy the podcast. [music] Glory to Jesus Christ, glory forever. Welcome back, everybody, to our study of the Everguitinos. And we are picking up this evening with hypothesis number 17. And so we're on page 131, if you're following along, and picking up with number three at the bottom of the page. Over these past weeks, we've been discussing apps and the importance of fasting, but also the love of these particular practices. And we've been making our way through a series of stories of how the monks engaged in a practice. And it's interesting what we're going to see evolve in this hypothesis. And the next is a leveling out of how they practiced it, that what they learned from experience. And so it's a fascinating thing to witness as we go through the fathers, we see the zeal that develops for it, and the love of fasting, and the absolute necessity in their minds of practicing it and practicing it deeply. But we also see a moderation that takes place that avoids extremes. So a daily kind of fasting, or eating only enough that is necessary for satiation, or brings the person up to that point, but not eating in excess. And so typically, they were eating once a day, but they moved away very quickly from extending the fast more than the 24-hour period, because they began to realize not only did it make the monks too fatigued to do their work, but it also had a negative effect upon their prayer life. If they were too tired, they wouldn't be able to maintain that discipline either. So they knew and understood the humbling of the mind and the body as being necessary, but it had to be done with restraint and wisdom. And again, it's a wonderful thing to see it unfold for us here in the practice of the monks themselves as we go through these hypotheses. So again, on page 131, number three. After that, for a further three years, he imposed this abstinence on himself. He would eat four or five ungiha, that is 27 grams of bread, and drink a corresponding amount of water. So St. Markarius of Alexandria, there's two St. Markarius of Alexandria and of Egypt. Both were great ascetics, but not to be confused with each other. But so a minimal amount again. But what was necessary along with the amount of water for daily sustenance. And we talked a little bit about this in the past that we often have a sense of needing more than what we do to survive on a day-to-day basis and to remain healthy and to be able to do our work. And as we'll see in their writings that they are not only able to do their works, but there are forms of obedience that also maintain this deep spiritual and prayer life. Number four. The Adamantine ascetic resolved to conquer sleep too. As he later recounted, for twenty whole days and nights, he did not enter his cell, but remained in the open air, where he was burned by the extreme heat of the day and frozen by the cold of the night. In order to overcome sleep, if it had not decided, if he, I'm sorry, if I had not decided it early on, he said, to stand under the roof of my cell, I would have gone out of my mind because my brain was burning. As much as I could then, he continued, I overcame sleep. I submitted to it only as much as was absolutely indispensable for the needs of nature in order to satisfy these needs. I allowed myself to sleep a little. So again, we see them as we're experimenting with all the appetites that we have as human beings, including that of sleep. And once more, the examples seem very extreme, standing outside, sleeping in the open air, only getting out of the sun so he didn't fry his brain. It's basically what he's talking about here. And so, undoubtedly, it sounds to modern ears or to anybody's ears to be extreme, and it was. And so we see, again, they're moderating it in what is to come. Again, we have to remember that the desert was a kind of laboratory. And I think that's always helpful to keep in mind as we go through the readings, that there weren't these great ascetics before them, that they go out for a particular reason, that the church had been embraced by the culture, or a kind of malaise had begun to set in. And so they go out to the desert to engage in this deep asceticism. But there were no rules of life at that period of time. And so a lot had to be learned through experience. And so the writings of the fathers aren't without stories of certain monks falling in the great dangers or harming their health by going to these extremes. And so we don't want to romanticize everything that certainly we read here. We have to be critical readers to understand that they were critical as well, examining why they were doing it, the motivations that they had, and whether or not it was within the boundaries of reason, that if it was excessive or if it was something that truly did help them. And so keeping in mind the sense of the desert being a laboratory that has given us this wealth of insight psychologically and spiritually to the movements of the human mind and spirit, but nonetheless was fraught with certain dangers. Number five, one occasion this saint was sitting in his cell and a mosquito stung him on the foot. In pain he killed the mosquito with his hand after it had drunk its fill of blood. Afterwards, when he had repented for taking vengeance on the mosquito that had injured him with its sting, he imposed the falling penits on himself. He went into the inner desert where the marshes of mosquitoes were located. There in the stagnant waters the mosquitoes were the size of wasp and could puncture even the hides of wild boars with their stings. He stayed in that place naked for a period of six months and the mosquitoes devoured his flesh to the extent that lumps like thick calluses broke out over his entire body. When he returned to his cell he had become so disfigured that even those who knew him did not recognize him. They recognized him as St. Mark carries the great, not from his face, but from his voice. Others who saw him but were unaware of what had happened, not that he had suffered from an attack of alpha and titans, such as was the great endurance displayed by this athlete of Christ. So, again, very extreme and I was surprised about the mosquitoes in Egypt. I wouldn't have thought there would be any in the arid environment of the desert, but what is being described here is exactly true. I went on little programmers there and I've mentioned this once before. We encountered these mosquitoes at night and so we sprayed ourselves all over and the one priest pulled the sheet up over his head at night. And we got up in the morning like at 3 a.m. for their vigils to join the monks. And a mosquito had bitten him on the bottom lip and his lip swelled up like the nutty professor was like five times the normal size. And it was rather humorous at the time excepting him. But the environment there is quite rigorous for a lot of different reasons. And this was one of them. But I think again, the thing that focus on is not the extreme or even doing this with mosquitoes. I think it's overcoming the human will and the need to pamper the body or to focus on self-comfort that we are so typically drawn to that the passions typically will feed off of this for us. Our tendency to want to soothe ourselves through our appetites and through the comforts of life that we can embrace. And so in this environment, one of the things they were trying to overcome was the tendency to cling to those things, to break attachment with the world or anything that would give rise to the passions. Often when you hear the word world used in the writings of the fathers, what they are speaking about are the passions as a whole or the individual passions in particular. And so what they were seeking to do was to break down that tendency to focus more on the body than on the soul. And they would go, as you see here, to great extremes to overcome the things that they abhorred. And certainly somebody getting bitten by a mosquito the size of a wasp would be disgusted by it, let alone being devoured by them. And so there were some of these holy fools, if you will, from our perspective, who were willing to let themselves be overcome in order to be free from any discomfort. And certainly this again was another example of an extreme one. When the same are curious was informed that the Tebina stone, Tebina Nesiotens, tricked in their way of life, he changed his clothing, and donned the garb of a layman, walked for 15 days, and went up to the debate. On reaching the monastery, he asked them to notify Archimandro the Comias, a man endowed with the gift of prophecy of his arrival. By divine providence, though, the spirit did not reveal Mercarius' circumstances to him. When they had invited him into the monastery and he met Comias, Mercarius said to him, "I beseech you, my lord, to accept me into your monastery so that I may become a monk. You are already an old man," St. Comias, the great replied to him, "how will you be able to cope with the ascetic life? There are brothers here who have devoted themselves to this discipline from their youth, having been brought up with hard work, and who can endure the rigors of asceticism. At your age, however, you will not be able to withstand such labors and exertions, rather you will give up hope and return to the world, where you will speak ill of us and cause very serious harm to yourself." Unwittingly, Comias, who himself was known for his greatness in the ascetic life, and as we mentioned, he was the first to establish a role of life, and very quickly, there were hundreds of not even thousands of monks who had gathered to live the life under this role. And so he's right, you know, there were some who had embraced this life from their youth, and so were used to the rigor of it. And so for an older man to present himself at the monastery, it would be an unusual thing for them to be willing to take him, thinking that it's interesting how he puts it, that he won't be able to cope and perhaps do himself harm, but then perhaps go back into the world and badmouthe them for their way of life, that they either did not receive him or that the life that they lived was extreme. Because on thus Comias did not accept him, but dismissed him, Markarius, however, did not leave, but remained for seven days outside the monastery gate without eating. On learning this, Comias called him inside again and repeated what he told him previously. Markarius then said to him, please accept me Abba, and if I do not fast as the brothers do, and do not work as they do, then order them to throw me out of the monastery. After this, Comias accepted him and rolled him in the monastery brotherhood, that monastery has 1400 monks to this day. After a short time had elapsed, the great fast began. So, it's in one of the details among the monastics is often this period of testing of desire for the monastic life that individuals can pursue the religious life out of, you know, because they're running from something in their life, or they've romanticized or idealized their life. And so often you will hear little stories like this, where they will be put to the test and or first denied entry altogether. And Markarius is able to, you know, stay outside the gate of the monastery not eat for an entire week, which is then enough to let the Comias invite him in to join them and enter into what was coming. So the great fast for the monastery, because he had sort of in some way had proved himself, and that's still a bit in the East. Part of the mindset is so interesting. They, there's a desire to see desire, if you will, within the heart, whether it's for young men who are pursuing vocations to the priesthood, women entrance into the convent the monastery, or similarly with monks as well to put that desire to the test. And another soul that the brothers gave themselves over to various kinds of a thesis. One would eat in the evening, as was customary another would every two days, and another every five days, while another would keep visual, standing up the entire night, and occupy himself with work during the day. One, in short, would apply himself to a different sort of a thesis and proportion to his eagerness and ability. One would carry us after moistening a sufficient number of palm shoots stood in a corner of the monastery, and until that had passed and Pascha arrived, ate no bread at all, did not drink water, did not bend his knees, did not lie down and did not eat anything other than a few raw cabbage leaves every Sunday. And he did this, in my opinion, so as to give the impression that he was eating, and to avoid falling into pride. He did not talk to anyone insignificant to or important, but stood in silence, attending to himself and conversing constantly with God in his heart. And he drew prayer while he played the palm shoots with his hands. So, he encounters the great rigor among these monks they had developed a kind of notoriety, in fact, for it for their asceticism. So, the various examples, Communist was sort of interesting in his role, that there was a role of prayer that the monks had to follow, but by monastic standards, it was fairly reasonable, wasn't excessive, and there was still a lot of room, I think, for individual expression and the approach to ones, daily disciplines, as well as additional prayers. And we sort of picked that up here within the reading, that the practices, even the practices of fasting varied from monk to monk. But the surprising thing is that this old man who did not think had it within him, basically goes on very little sleep, almost no eating, no lying down for the entire great fast. And it becomes sort of a great source of surprise, as we will see to the young monks here. When the brothers saw this extreme endurance, they went to become this and told him, "Abba, when did you bring us this incorporeal man to be a living condemnation of us with his asceticism, either expel him from here or be assured that we will take leave of you today. When Pecomius the Great had learned about the man and his superhuman feats, he prayed to God that he would disclose to him the identity of this man who displayed such endurance. God revealed to him that it was Marcarious, the monk. So it's interesting, this extraordinary ability on the part of Marcarious, that he lived like they said in an incorporeal being that he lived like an angel. He didn't seem to need sleep or food. It becomes something that is so humbling to them, that they give an ultimatum to Pecomius, get rid of him now, or we're leaving in the monastery today, they could not bear his presence. It's sort of an interesting thing, isn't it, that despite one's discipline and greatest ascism at that, that one can sort of cling to this reputation of being a greatest at it. And they all stand revealed by this old man to the point then of wanting to give up the monastic life, if Pecomius allows him to remain, they're being humiliated by this old man. So Pecomius immediately went up to him, took him by the hand and led him to the chapel. There, after embracing him, he said to him, "Come now, venerable father, you are Marcarious. Why did you conceal this from me? For many years, ever since I heard about you, I've been wanting to make your acquaintance. I owe you a debt of gratitude for humbling my spiritual children, lest they become prideful about their asceticism. Go now to your own place, I beg you, because you have contributed enough to our spiritual edification, and please pray for us." And after the brothers had honored him fittingly, he departed and went back to his cell. It's an interesting way of putting it. You've contributed enough to our edification. Now, don't let the door hit you on the, on the way out. But I think it is genuine that this Marcarious did have this reputation of extraordinary holiness, and that Pecomius does realize that he revealed something pretty profound that eventually could have brought the community to its knees, the pride of its members. That despite the externals, the asceticism that they had in great measure, that, again, their willingness to give up the vocation in the face of being humbled by an old man reveals an incredible weakness within them. They are so prideful that they even ultimately made them to the abbot. So, again, and I guess it's tried to say never judge by its cover, but, you know, it's true of ascetics too. Here's an old man, and where nobody thought this would be possible for him. But by the grace of God, that there was this transformation that took place, and we see this among the Saints East and West. You know, those who buy grace, and their desire for God were able to do with very little. Catherine of Siena was one, you know, certainly Francis of the CC, you know, some of them living on the Eucharist for quite a long period of time, or some on very little food or very little sleep. And so, I think every once in a while, God raises up individuals like this to not only humble us, but to really question ourselves, what is our response to God in the spiritual life. What are we willing to do in order to be free of the passions. And so they become important examples for that reason, maybe not to emulate them exactly, of course, but to drive us on, disperse on in the spiritual life and battle. This heavenly man related the following to me. Once I decided not to take my mind off of God for five days, and not to think about anything material, but to keep my thoughts focused on him, and to have my eyes of my soul trained on otherworldly concepts. After I had finally resolved to do this, I completely closed off my cell and my front yard from the outside world, so that I could not respond to anyone who might come, and I commenced my undertaking on a Monday. I exhorted my mind, saying, be sure not to descend at all from heaven. There you have the angels, archangels, all the heavenly hosts, the cherubim and the seraphim and finally God, the creator of all. Spend your time there, do not descend beneath heaven, and do not fall into materialistic thoughts. So after abiding in these thoughts for two days, he went on to say, I aggravated the devil so much that he turned himself into a fiery flame and totally consumed everything in my cell, even the rush map on which I was standing. Thinking I might even be burned up myself, I grew afraid, for this reason on the third day, I departed from the otherworldly contemplation, and descended to contemplating this world, and began to think about material things. Thus I was not given any opportunity to become conceited about this matter. So he's humbled certainly by it, by the fierceness of the attack and then being driven by his fear out of his commitment. He also speaks to us of someone whose attention is completely directed toward God, and the things of the kingdom, that the fierceness of the attack, there is great. And if the person's mind and art is directed only upon the things of the kingdom on that which is spiritual, then the evil one will often attack on the physical level. And we've mentioned this about a few of the saints before john Viani, pudger pio, a number of them experienced these physical attacks beatings from the devil himself, and with this desire to frighten to dissuade them from their spiritual practices, anything to pull them out of their, out of their mind. So completely focused that they become upon God and so freed that they become from attachment to the things of this world, and material attachments, even such as what is going to be needed for the food of the day. And again, this tells us something important that, you know, as we enter into the spiritual battle, and as the heart is purified, that the spiritual battle can become all the more fierce, that the greater threat is one who has eyes only for God in the things of the kingdom, who has lost the attachment to the world and the things that give rise to the passions. And so the evil one will do everything within his power, even in the physical realm to try to draw a person away from the life that they've taken from the path they're on. And he thoughts about any of these stories so far. I won't ask if there's anything disturbing, so I imagine there, there has been, but okay. Letter B halfway down the page on 134. There is a mountain in Egypt, which leads to skedis, and which is called fair may. About 500 ascetics live on this mountain. Among them, there was once one by the name of Paul, an excellent monk, who throughout his ascetic life, observed this practice. He never undertook any work, did not engage in retailing handiwork, and accepted nothing from anyone except for his daily sustenance. He occupied himself constantly and unseasoned prayer. He had made it his role to say 300 prayers every day. After collecting an equal number of pebbles, he would place them in his lap and counted the prayers with them. When he finished one prayer, that is, he would throw one heble onto the ground. So this is sort of a little famous story, so you might want to mark this a little bit, just because it is something of the origin of the child key of the prayer road. That the way that they sort of involved the body, the self in the saying of the prayers, was to make use of these pebbles, of having them in their lap and then throwing them into a pile, as to help keep them focused. Not so much again on the counting, as it is to keep their focus upon the prayer itself. And then gradually over the course of time, we find that the prayer road, the chalk key, develop out of this. So it's one of the few places where I've actually come across this story, so I might want to mark it. He wants paid a visit to St. Marcarious the Great, who was surname political the citizen or patrician, either indicating that he was from the city of Alexandria, or opposed to St. Marcarious the Egyptian, his elder contemporary, or a reference to his gentility. Well, for one second. Okay. And setting them, Abba Macarius, I am in great distress. The servant of God Macarius then pressed him to tell him the cause of his sorrow. He replied in a certain village, their dwells of virgin, who has been practicing asceticism for 30 years now. I have been told of her that with the exception of Saturdays and Sundays, she does not eat at all. She eats every five days and says 700 prayers every day. When I heard this, I despair because although as a man, I surpass her in bodily strength, yet I cannot say more than 300 prayers. On hearing this St. Marcarious replied to him for 60 years now, I've made it my role to say 100 prayers and to work with my hands in order to provide my sustenance. I maintain regular contact with the brothers, and my conscience does not condemn me for having ever neglected anything. So if, in spite of saying 300 prayers, you are condemned by your conscience, it is obvious that your prayer is not pure and that although you are capable of praying more, you do not do so. So his heart is not pure in one way or another. I think either that he is not praying to the extent that God wills of him or that he's capable of doing. So Macarius tells him, I pray 100 prayers, and I focus on providing for my daily sustenance, I engage the brothers, and my conscience is free. And so saying to him, you know, I faithfully carry out my prayer role, and I'm not bothered by it. And so either he's bothered by the fact that he's not engaging deeply enough in his spiritual life, especially given the way that he had set it up for himself, or he's simply prideful, he's comparing himself to another. And especially comparing himself to one that he feels in his own mind is should is or should be weaker than him that he should be able to do more than her. And here she's saying, what was it 700 prayer, 700 prayers a day, and eating, you know, just a couple times a week. And so either he was comparing herself and so in his pride is Phil's diminished by it, and is seeking his counsel. Or he is being lazy or negligent and not embracing the grace that God has given him. He's not being diligent as he should be throughout the course of his day. So either way, the father reveals to him this elder reveals to him that his heart is not pure. And so he needs to examine what his motivations are, and what the will of God is for him in his prayer life. There's always a terrible danger in comparing oneself to another person in the spiritual life. And, you know, it's good to have examples to emulate, and to look to the saints and their writings and to be able to talk to confidants in our life. But every person's life is not the same, you know, different people carry different burdens have different crosses that they carry and have been are given grace to pray in a certain way. And some fast a lot, some maybe not as much, but we don't know what else is going on in their life and who or what they are attending to. And so we need to keep our focus upon God, and being as diligent and disciplined as we can be in what we, and also in accord with what we need, where our vulnerabilities lie. Now, sometimes there's, we will get into this further on about the particular passions. And, you know, we may have overcome certain passions, but there might be a handful of others that we've not attended to at all. And so again, it's another reason to keep our focus upon ourselves. We don't know the purity of heart of the other, and what they need or what they do not need. All we know with an clarity is what's going on within our own minds and arts. Spiritual directors and priests have to be very careful about this too, whether it's in the confessional or in giving spiritual counsel, you know, to recognize where the other person is what what are the realities within their life. What their strengths and weaknesses are, and allow that understanding to develop over the course of time, not to be quick to give counsel, or to create a rule for another person. Because you can do a great harm to an individual, and eventually dissuade them from this spiritual life altogether if you place too much on them, or if you don't challenge them enough, equally make them fall away from it because they see no fruit from it. So a person has to be persons where their spiritual father spiritual mother has to from experience be able to listen to the one who's coming to them. And again, this isn't something that they teach very well in seminary, you know, either about experience or about listening to the other, you know, that we aren't fixers. We're not trying to fix other people's lives. We're trying to understand who they are, the struggles that they have, you know, how they see Christ, and what is going to be a source of healing for them. You know, a physician who doesn't listen to his patients is likely going to miss the right diagnosis. I'm always impressed by the physicians in our day, because they're a rarity who actually listen to their patients. My mom has had the experience with, I think, dermatologists, where the young doctors, they're told you have, is it a 15 or 15 minutes slot. My mom asked this one to bandage a wound, you know, from having taken something off. And she said, I'm sorry, my 10 or 15 minutes are off. It's, and then, though, if you find a doctor who is getting yelled at by UPMC that's our main medical facility here in Pittsburgh or medical group getting yelled at by their boards and their insurance agents because they're spending 45 minutes or an hour with a patient. Those are the doctors to go to, because they're listening to you about your life, your lifestyle, what are the things that contribute to whatever health problems you might be having. It's always the best diagnosticians, and they're in their rarity, in our day, and, but the same is true in the spiritual life. You know, it's not one size fits all, and a spiritual father or mother has to be someone who remains silent. I'm just willing to listen, both to what is being said and what is not being said by those coming to them in order to get a sense of what they are really struggling with. And that can be frustrating to a person who comes and is hurting and saying, tell me what to do, fix my life. Well, as a spiritual father, you don't want to make it worse. The most I heard from my analyst in training at times was they're dropping their pen on the floor by accident or something like that, you know, and so it could, it could be, and I'm not saying that a priest or sister or spiritual in any way should be like that, but we can learn a lot there about listening on this very deep level. And especially listening through the depth of our own prayer, praying for the other that we might understand or see what we need to see. So where letter C is that correct. Yes, okay. From the same author. A certain aesthetic of themes, Dorotheos lived in the boondocks, five semia out of Alexandria. I was entrusted to him by Saint Isidor, the presbyter and guest master of the Church of Alexandria. For I had come to the latter originally when I was young and begged him to instruct me in the monastic life. The holy Isidor took me out of the city and led me to Dorotheos the ascetic. He handed me over to him and asked him to teach me the duties of a monk. Dalvar Dorotheus lived in great hardship. The whole day long and even in the very heat of noon day, he would gather rocks in the desert near the sea and build cells, which he presented to those who out of infirmity were unable to construct their own. I once asked him, Father, what are you doing at your age? You are killing your body in this severe heat. He replied to me, this, my body is killing me. I will kill it too. So, you know, this old man realizes that it often is the body that we struggle with. Again, the appetites or the desires or the passions that are often tied to them. And so, physical labor, humbling the body, either in one's obedience or in these kinds of work that he's engaged in or through the practice of fasting and sleep and food is a way of humbling that body to the point that we enfeeble it, but strengthen the soul and the process. Every day, he would eat six, a bread that is, again, 27 grams and sometimes a few wild greens and a drink about a cup of water. As God is my witness, I never noticed him stretching out his feet or falling on to a rush mat or a bed with the intention of sleeping. He would sit up the whole night and weave baskets out of palm shoots in order to provide his food, supposing that he was displaying such a set of now, because I was present. I learned from those who had known him very well from the beginning, since they had at one time been disciples of his, that he had practiced such a set of system, even from his youth. He never slept in a normal way, but only inclining his head a little and closing his eyes slightly for while working or eating, such that the bread often fell from his mouth as he treated on account of his dire need of sleep. So, I've always, I've found this more and more interesting over time. And, you know, I even came across something online today, and saying that there was a guy being interviewed and saying, what are the chances of somebody, you know, functioning well on five or six hours of sleep. And the guy said with his absolute certainty zero. And I think to myself, I don't know about that. I've read hundreds, it's not thousands of stories of these, not only desert monks, but the saints who discipline themselves, not for the sake of like worldly work. And you might have often heard it said by the saints that one hour of prayer is equal to three hours of sleep. That there's a restorative effect of prayer of this entering into the life of Christ on a deeper level that often does raise them up on on this supernatural level, where they could either go without food or go without sleep for longer periods of time. And again, in our health conscious society, where we can be hyper attentive to the body, even to the point of hypochondria, that the notion of somebody doing something like this. And it having being able to sustain themselves into old age and do physical labor, but also be healthy and mind, as well spirit would seem nonsensical. But someone who reads the lives of the saints and understands anything about the life of prayer can really nod their head and understand that, you know, being nourished upon, he was the bread of life, or having once thirst quenched by the living waters that Christ offers to us. And, you know, finding rest for our souls in Christ, the one who calls us to himself. You know that these are individuals who took the Lord at his word, in the deepest fashion, and so find themselves nourished in ways that we don't understand on the natural level. And it's only when we begin to taste something of the sweetness of that, and even in the smallest way of choosing prayer over the kind of restoration that we typically seek, whether it is sleep, eight to ten hours a day, or television, or food. You know, if once we begin to back away from those things, we can find ourselves being strengthened in ways that we have never known, and having a clarity of mind about relationships, our work, what it is that we want and desire, a freedom from anxiety, you know, in the trials of life. And so part of, I think what this is to cultivate is a desire for that that we might know what they came to know, not by necessarily imitating them exactly, but taking hold of that same spirit. And then we can cord him to stretch out a little on a rush map. He then said to me in sorrow, if you ever persuade the angels to sleep, you will hereby also persuade him who burns with zeal to imitate them. He sent me at the ninth hour, that is the third hour of the afternoon to fetch water from the well for us to drink. I saw an asp in the well. I ran back to him and fear and told him, Abba, we're going to die, for I saw an asp in the well. When we heard this he smiled a little, looked at me for some time and then quietly shaking his head said to me, if the devil decides to throw ass and snakes tortoises or other venomous reptiles into all the wells will you stop drinking water. He went out of a cell and when he had reached the well he filled a bucket on his own with water from the well, made the sign of the cross over the water, and was himself the first to drink of it. The sign of the crosses may he told me, the evil of Satan is powerless. So it's interesting immediately on, you know, following on the story of his, a great asceticism, then is this kind of fearlessness of the things of this world and a fulfillment of what Christ promises. You know, they will pick up, you know, venomous creatures and not not die. And, and so the sign of the cross has this extraordinary power. And, but often what is lacking is even that mustard seed of faith that really believes, really believes in that. We're like, we're more like the young monk that comes running back, you know, filled with fear and anxiety. How are we going to drink anything? You know, there's an ask in the well. Any comments or questions. From the drawn to con. Abba Daniel told the following story about Abba Arsenius. He once summoned my spiritual fathers Abba Alexandra and Alexandra and Abba Zolos, and humbling himself said to them, since the demons make war on me. And I do not know whether they seized me during my sleep I beseech you to struggle together with me tonight and observe whether I become drowsy while I keep vigil. So starting in the evening, one of them sat on his right, the other at his left without saying anything. And so subsequently related what happened. We went to sleep and woke up, but we did not notice him becoming at all sleepy. In the morning we saw only saw him breathe deeply three times. And at once he rose and said, yes, I certainly felt sleepy. And that he, we were unaware. So, you know, unable to see himself, whether the demons were warring against him, or leading him into sleep. You know, he wants these holy men to watch with him and pray with him, whether or not he fell asleep. It proves not to be the case, although he certainly felt sleepy, which I think would be true of anyone, you know, going on so little. But sometimes I think anxiety can get the best of us in this regard. And, and, but I think one of the ideas putting put forward here too is that demons at times will seek to make us sleepy at times of prayer. Whether it's through suggestion, or whatever it might be, or to be overly attentive to physical fatigue or pain, or whatever it might be. And so he is keenly enough aware that that could be the possibility that he wants to only individuals to watch to see what is if he's being attacked in such a way, filling himself sleepy at those times of prayer, especially later in the night. So, we have to be aware of that as well. You know, it's natural times that we should fall asleep in a relaxed state. But if it's happening every time we engage in prayer, we have to ask ourselves, you know, is there something else going on here? You know, and do I need to respond in such a way that I'm being more attentive to what's going on as I engage in prayer my posture, or whatever it might be so that I'm not drifting off. This is why they didn't sit down, or wouldn't allow themselves to lie down, because they knew it was a way of keeping keeping themselves awake. The same elevator related concerning of Arsenias that he always stayed awake the entire night. And when in the morning, he was compelled by necessity of nature to sleep a little while sitting. He would say to sleep, come here you wicked servant. He would then sleep for a little while, and immediately awaken. You know, every once in a while, they would realize, okay, I need a little bit to give myself a little bit in order to be able to function. And again, we have to keep in mind, you know, the life that they led, or the kind of labor that they were engaged into. And, you know, those who live in the world, and have certain tasks, you know, might need more. But again, those who are being sustained by prayer, as well as engaging in this particular level of labor are also going to be strengthened by. So, again, see it for what it is. But the Syrian said, I remain standing for 40 days and nights amid thorn bushes without sleeping in order to overcome sleep. So, thorn bushes, I know St. Francis did something similar to overcome lost, throwing himself into thorn bushes, I think at one point, but again, we're getting close to this next hypothesis. So, you know, hold it in mind, we're seeing what we're seeing here is experimentation with all the appetites and needs of the body. And then we're going to come in the next hypothesis again to the sort of leveling off of that in accord with wisdom and restraint that is necessary. The same Avobusarian said, for 40 years, I've not laying on my side, but have slept sitting down or standing up. This elder passed his life like a bird of the air without disturbance or anxiety. He acquired nothing on this earth, not even the slightest thing, neither books nor clothing, except for a single torn garment. He never went beneath a roof, but always a boat in the open air and desolate and uninhabited places where he struggled against the cold and the heat. And this way, he succeeded in transcending the needs of the body. It so happened that he once went into an inhabited region and coming upon a certain monastery sat outside the door and wept as if he were a survivor of a shipwreck. He asked why he when asked why he was weeping, he said, I am weeping for the wealth that I have lost and for the former glory and ability from which I have miserably fallen. When he was invited to go inside the monastery and to eat with the monks, but could not be persuaded they offered him bread saying to him, take this bread for now and whatever you have lost, God can restore to you again. As he took the bread, he sighed deeply and said, I do not know if I will be able to find what I lost, but I will not cease from seeking after it with all my strength. Thus did he finish his course. So what is the nobility that he lost in his mind, I think we are to ask in reading this, you know, is he really weeping over having lost the things of this world, or is he weeping over having lost a greater nobility and Christ that he had at a certain point. He had a time of greater zeal, where he didn't move and visit a monastery but remained in the desert in the open air. You know, was he constrained at some point, physically to seek out need in the monastery and so finds himself weeping over it. And then as to the end of the hypothesis. And so, you know, as we prepare for next week to hold it in mind. You know that what this is a preparation for and again this idea of the desert being a kind of laboratory, and a place of seeking to restrain the flesh and the passions. And so often it does reach this level of extreme Anthony writes his weeping sounds like da Vinci who lamented not using God's gifts more, but like Sarah no diverse rack who struggled to maintain honor. Yeah, I think in some some way that there was some virtue some depth of prayer, or something within the spiritual life that had just dissipated for one reason or another that he did not maintain that course. That he had been on. And, but next week, I think, you know, we'll keep these in mind but we'll be moving on to something that, you know, gives us a little bit more perspective for I think for our own life. Okay. So thank you all, and won't be close with an our father and then go get our one hour sleep for the night. And the father this on the Holy Spirit, Amen. Our father, who art in heaven, how will it be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us to stay our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those trespass against us and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen. The Lord be with you. I mean, I want to God bless you the father, the son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen. Go in peace.
